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To be honest, I was very distracted while watching the video.  I was more focused on the illustrations than what the message was conveying.  However, I did gather a few takeaways.  When having crucial conversations, it is important to keep your opinions, facts, and stories separate.  Sometimes our opinions can come across as facts.  The article mentioned how sometimes we are quick to make snap judgments after only receiving a little bit of the information.  I used to be very guilty of this.  As a result, I would constantly be on an emotional roller coaster because I would be content, then I would receive a tid bit of information that would make me upset/frustrated/sad/etc.  After gathering all of the facts I would then be embarrassed that I made such a snap judgment before gathering all the information.  Currently I do a much better job at trying to see everyone's perspective and gathering all the data rather than being so quick to react. This situation has not come up specifically with my mentor, but if it does in the future I will make sure to gather the facts and keep those separate from my opinions and my stories.

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This topic is of particular interest to me.  Effective communication is something that I have always struggled with.  Prior to crucial conversations, I envision how the conversations will go.  In these scenarios, I am confident, prepared, and I get the results that I am looking for.  However, once I am actually in the middle of these conversations, I frequently find that I am not as confident as I should be, I have compromised more than I wanted to because I don't want to "rock the boat", and I have created stories in my mind as to why the other person is acting/speaking the way that he/she is.  As a result, I find that many of my conversations do not end with the results that I want.
As a result, as I move forward, I intend to implement some of the strategies that were mentioned in the video and written about in the article.  I particularly want to focus on changing my attitude.  Because of my previous failures with crucial conversations, I have developed a belief that these conversations will not be productive or satisfying.  I feel as though I am doomed before I even begin.  However, by approaching these conversations with the belief that I will be successful,  confident, and not so quick to judge, my experiences may have a different outcome.  It reminds me of the saying, "Fake it till you make it".  This strategy will be difficult to implement in the beginning but should make these conversations easier and more effective in the future. As a result, I will be happier with the outcomes of these crucial conversations and my mentorees will also benefit from the effective communication that I am developing.

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When I first started watching this video, I didn't understand what it was about and it was moving so fast. Iwas trying ro read and listen and see what the drawings were and it was too much. I didn't like it.  It is a good example of doodling. I had to stop and pause the video and also rewind it, to understand what the video was teaching. What I learned from the video is the definition of a crucial conversation  A conversation where stakes are high, opinions vary, and emotions run strong.  It then gives some suggestions of ways these conversations can be successful.  All important information is exposed in the dialogue and nothing is hidden from the other in the conversation.  The important end to these conversations is that you get what you want for yourself, for others and for the relationship between the two in the dialogue.  Each party has to be willing to put aside emotion and listen to the other.  This also goes along with the article.  We need to understand what others facial expressions mean and read their body language along with what they are saying. The author also wants a listener in these conversations to watch for silence and violence.  If either of these occurs in the conversation, you need to reestablish mutual purpose again and this will make the other person feel safe again.  Then continue with your conversation. They need to know that you care about what they have to say. A person needs to say something like, "I don't mean to offend you," If you are the person who feels that they are not safe, then you have to tell yourself that the other wants to work things out or does not mean to hurt you.
I feel it is important that when you have these conversations that you keep in mind what your purpose is and to watch for clues that tell you the other person in the dialogue does not feel safe. If this happens, you need to use the tools given to put the conversation back on track. If you know how to do this you will be able to obtain the initial goal you started with.

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Wow, that’s a lot of visual information to take in with the verbal in this video. It was difficult for me to follow because of this. In “re-watching” I opened a google doc to type ideas while it was on, which cut out a lot of the chatter.

While trying to having an important and meaningful conversation with your mentee it is important to keep a few tips and tricks in mind. When you are entering a high-stakes conversation you want to keep yourself in check. What are you truly trying to communicate? What is the most important to the least important talking point? How can you keep these straight and to the point.

It is very important to be able to recognize when someone starts to shut down in a situation that involves crucial conversations. Look for these two components: silence or violence to help gauge effective understanding. If someone starts to shut down, how are you able to bring them back to the table to participate in the conversation?

Are you ‘skilled at dialogue?’ If yes, make certain you are allowing the other person to share their thoughts and feelings  in a variety of ways. Summarize what they’re saying with heart. Focus on the main goal you are trying to share. Keep a constant assessment with how the conversation is going.

In future conversations with my mentee it is important to remember the common goal. Understanding that mutual respect and purpose are the key to communicating and teaching best educational practices is important to any conversation. I am an admittedly emotional person. I feed off of those around me and worry that this would affect conversations with a mentee. How can I keep this in check? By constantly re-assessing the point of the crucial conversation and sticking to my key purpose.

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I had a hard time following the video.  After it was done, I reread the illustration and that helped for me to understand a little better.  Then I played it a third time with close captioning on so I could focus on what was being said.  What I got out of both the video and the article was the importance of knowing what you really want for self, for others, and for the relationship.  Be sure to start with the facts and not your story which may or may not have all the facts.  Encourage others to share their facts.  And maintain mutual purpose and mutual respect if the dialogue starts to become unsafe.  (Silence and violence.)
I thought that the article was interesting in how you can "fool" a person into thinking you are more confident that you really are by : Using body language (turning torso towards the person);  taking advantage of others snap judgements of you (smile , reveal your teeth when smiling, and maintaining eye contact); adjusting your attitude by being grateful for what you do have and comfortable with what you do not; maintaining perspective - is it your lack of confidence or your lack of information; and finally, be consistent at all times.

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The video was very hard to follow because there was so much going on in the background. One takeaway that I had from the video is to make sure there is a safe environment and relationship. It's important to not make someone angry or hurt by what we say. The article had some interesting points in it. While reading it, I realized that my face shows my emotions pretty frequently. Depending on what my face says, people may not be convinced that I feel the same was and my words sound. It can also make people feel like they are an inconvenience to me. It's not that I try to make people feel that way, my face will just look that way sometimes. It is important to allow your body language to speak for you. Show trust and engagement so the person talking to you can recognize that you are interested in what they are saying. It is also important to keep the other person's perspective in mind. We need to recognize if we have a lack of information or a lack of confidence. The way we handle those two situations are completely different!