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“I have learned the importance of survival and claiming the label of “survivor,” but I don’t mind the label of “victim.” Pg. 20

- In some way, Gay is accepting was has happened to her and is starting her journey to move forward. Yet she knows it is something she will never complete detach herself from. She knows in order to move on and progress in her life she has to mentally and emotionally accept the situation ad circumstances that occurred in her past, but also acknowledging that it did happen and that is something no one can take away. She wasn’t trying to relieve the hardship of what occurred but she also did not want to constantly have to live in the past and let that incident become her entire story. Gay knows she is more than that and while she’s not pretending it didn’t happen she knows in order to further herself and her journey she needs to process it, accept t, and be okay with being a victim.

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“I hate myself. Or society tells me I am supposed to… But I also like myself, my personality, my weirdness, my sense of humor.” Pg. 148
- This is the main idea throughout the novel that ties it all together. Gay is shining the light on what is not a surprise to many of us. The way society thinks they can tell us how we should act, look, or present ourselves. Being larger than “average” is looked down upon and cannot be considered attractive. Being ridiculously thin is considered to be healthy. We ignore all eating disorders because the only thing being focused on is how one looks. Not for what we have to say, our thoughts, our opinions, none of that is of importance nor displayed in society. Gay defies what society puts out and accepts that yes, she is a larger woman but yes, she does love herself for who she is and how she is. Yes, it is okay to like who you are even if society tells you that you are not “supposed” to be the way you are.

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“When you’re fat, no one will pay attention to disordered eating or they will look the other way or will look right through you. You get to hide in plain sight. I have hidden in plain sight, in one way or another, for most of my life. Willing myself to not do that anymore, willing myself to be seen, is difficult.” Pg. 196

- Gay points out that we let this type of lifestyle consume people because it’s overlooked constantly. We automatically link being skinny or thin as being healthy. It is never looked into that maybe just because one is skinny that they are healthy and that they have no eating disorders. I also believe that Gay used this quote as a way to hid herself from what she had gone through. She was easily overlooked and didn’t have to face anyone asking her anything personal because she was constantly being looked through. It was a way for her to hide under everything and avoid anything that would possibly bring up something she wanted to keep in the past and didn’t want to talk about. This is also when society is exposed as to what is really the main subject targeted. Not the eating habits that people have, but the way their body looks.

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“I feel like everything I do is being watched, scrutinized, judged. I deprive myself, to give the appearance of conforming, of making some small effort to become thinner, better, less of a family problem.” Pg. 230

- Gay highlights the way fat shaming affects your body both mentally and physically. In many times some don’t even realize they are doing so because they may think the person they are staring at or commenting about is not paying attention but in fact they are. It can be as simple as suggesting a lifestyle that is clearly not what they are used to or making comments that were completely unasked for. Gay displays the prime example of what it is like to be constantly reminded by society on how you’re supposed to look and how that only makes unhealthy eating habits that much easier to continue. The pressure that society puts on people and their bodies can be overwhelming to say the least and that is one of the many contributions as to how eating disorders and unhealthy eating patterns form. Gay shows how hard judgement can affect ones mind.

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“Sometimes, people who, I think, mean well like to tell me I am not fat. They will say things like, “Don’t say that about yourself,” because they understand “fat” as something shameful, something insightful, while I understand “fat” as a reality of my body.” Pg. 201

- Gay expresses how the word “fat” has always been seen as something mean and offensive. It is something many people refrain from using to describe someone no matter whether it is true or not. Most of the people that avoid or refrain from using the word are usually thin and believe that it is used as an insult. While those who are heavier set use the word and it does not bother them, they see it as defining themselves by not beating around the bush and being honest with themselves. So when it is used in front of people who are skinny they tend to see it as an insult because society has  taught us that the word “fat” has a negative connotation that sticks to it.

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“I was broken and numb to the pain of that brokenness, I ate and ate and ate, and then I was not just overweight or fat. Less than a decade later, I was morbidly obese and then I was super morbidly obese. I was trapped in my body, one I made but barely recognized or understood. I was miserable but I was safe.” Pg. 22

- Gay describes how she used excessive eating as almost a type of coping mechanism. She explained that she felt broken inside and food was her safety zone and the only thing that was there for her while she was going through the different emotions during this time. The more she ate the bigger she got, and the bigger she got the less she would recognize herself. She felt safe knowing that because her body was not what most people would draw their eyes to she knew she would not have to go through what she had gone through in the past. It was the only way she would feel secure and safe, food was the only thing she depended on. Gay looked for that comfort in food and invested herself into over eating whenever she felt lonely or torn as to what occurred.

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“What does it say about our future that the desire for weight loss is considered a default feature of womanhood.” Pg. 137

- This displays the way society works and what their main priority is. They teach woman to look a certain way and only focus on that. It is rarely ever glorified in the media that education is key and that women’s rights should be more than just having a “good looking” body with a slender figure. It’s been ongoing for years and personally, I believe, it just keeps getting worse. Not only is it a pressured topic in woman hood but it is now progressing into the minds of young girls and how women are “supposed to look”. It is so easy to associate woman and weight loss to be the only thing on their mind. As if that is their only priority to fit in with the beauty standards that are being upheld by the different outlets of society. It is very important to steer away from this stigma and enlighten younger girls there is more to life than having a nice body.