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Another way of handeling

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Educating Nathan: raising a profoundly gifted child

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Another way of handling an extremely gifted child

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Another way of handling an extremely gifted child

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Inside The Mind Of Jaxon Cota An 11-Year-Old Kid Genius | NBC Nightly News

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A tiger mom episode in a restaurant

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'Tiger Mother' Rips Into Kid Over A-Minus- What Would You Do-  ABC News

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An article about a  child raised to be gifted by a tiger mom

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An article about a  child raised to be gifted by a tiger mom

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Some second-semester college seniors are content to phone it in. Lulu Chua-Rubenfeld, on the other hand, just completed a 90-page thesis on Jewish-American identity in early 20th century New York and a 10-page paper on the Shah of Iran.

"If I could be the kind of person who could let loose, I would. But I can't just blow off a paper," says the bubbly 22-year-old Harvard senior. "I don't slack - and that's part of Tiger Mom."

Seven years ago, Lulu was a 14-year-old high school freshman at the Hopkins School in New Haven, Conn., when her mom, Amy Chua, published her incendiary, best-selling 2011 memoir, " Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother."

Chua detailed her strict "tiger mom" parenting tactics with her two daughters, Lulu, a rebellious violin prodigy, and Lulu's older sister, overachiever Sophia, who was a Harvard-bound high school senior when the book came out. The girls' childhoods included a total ban on TV-watching, play dates and sleepovers. Chua wrote of how when Lulu was 4, she rejected her daughter's homemade birthday card for looking sloppy.

Lulu was ordered to practice the violin six hours a day, and both girls were required to play the piano flawlessly - or Chua would threaten to burn their stuffed animals. The merest hint of failure was met with name-calling: Sophia was "garbage," Lulu a "disgrace as a daughter."

Imperfection was not an option.

Now, Lulu is 22 years old, about to graduate from Harvard (where she currently maintains a 3.9 GPA) and feeling ready to take on the world - thanks to Tiger Mom.

"It was just as intense as the book makes it out to be, practicing violin six hours a day for years. It was absolutely grueling," says Lulu, speaking from her Harvard dorm. "She was an intense mom. Had I had the option of hours of violin every day or watching TV with my friends, of course I wouldn't have chosen [the former]."

In the book, she famously erupted during a family trip to Russia. Smashing a glass at a cafe, she bellowed: "I'm not what you want - I'm not Chinese! I don't want to be Chinese. Why can't you get that through your head? I hate the violin. I hate my life. I hate you, and I hate this family!"

Lulu recalls the fallout. "I think she was more in shock, because for her it felt like the culmination of a lot of stress and fighting. She started writing her book right after, I think literally in Moscow, as her outlet."

And yet Lulu stayed the course, continuing to practice violin, earning straight A's and even gaining early admittance into Yale, though she ultimately decided on Harvard ("There's no chance of running into my parents at a bar in Boston," she says).

'[My mom] gave me the tools to drive my own confidence ... I will definitely be a tiger mom.'

Shockingly, once she arrived at the Cambridge campus, her parents were completely hands-off.

"OK, we're going to get out of your hair now," Lulu recalls them saying shortly after they dropped her off with her suitcases.

"She's super uninvolved now. I don't think she even knows what classes I'm taking. She thinks her job is done and hopefully I've absorbed some of her lessons. Now I have to sink or swim."

While she found independence "exhilarating," it wasn't without its hiccups.

During her first semester, Lulu panicked over an ethics paper on Kant's concept of the categorical imperative and found herself slumped on her dorm's bathroom floor in tears. She called Tiger Mom.

"She was very stern with me," recalls Lulu. "She said, 'Pull yourself together because you know you can do this. Get off the bathroom floor and start writing.'"

Lulu wound up getting an A on the paper and in the class.

Later in her freshman year, she discovered her life had become source material for a child-psychology class.

To illustrate the fixed nature of temperament, a professor had highlighted an incident in her mother's memoir in which a 3-year-old Lulu stood outside her house, refusing to come in from the cold, after a clash over playing the piano.
"She would sooner freeze to death than give in," her mother wrote.

Lulu was outraged. She confronted the professor, demanding to know why she was made an example of. "I was like, 'You don't know me - you don't know if I've changed.' So I called my mom and she was like, 'Lulu, you haven't changed.' I'm still a rebel, right? I have to live up to my reputation," she says with a laugh.

And while students were curious about her upbringing, she doesn't feel she's been overshadowed by her overbearing mother.

"I feel mostly totally normal," she says. "I don't think I'm important enough for people to care."

"I really was a great violinist," she adds. "At Harvard, I'm not the best of anything - everybody's a genius here - but I never have impostor syndrome. I always feel like I deserve it, because I did work really hard."

She says all that heavy lifting in high school prepared her well for Harvard, where she can sleep all she wants and socialize with friends. Last year, she was president of the Sab Club, formerly known as Sablière Society, a longtime women-only club that went coed under her leadership.

"I feel much more relaxed now than I did in high school," says Lulu, who is single. "I go out, I have lots of friends. It's definitely a work-hard, play-hard mentality."

As she looks back on her college experience, Lulu has a newfound appreciation for her mother's brutal parenting style.

"People assume that tiger parenting would beget low self-esteem because there isn't that constant praise, but I think I'm exiting with a lot more confidence than some others, because my confidence is earned," she says. "[My mom] gave me the tools to drive my own confidence."

While she's still figuring out what she will do after graduation - she's considering law school and a move to New York City - she says she does know one thing.

"I will definitely be a tiger mom," she says. "It's not a blanketly bad thing to push. Sometimes it just means you really believe in your child."

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I was raised by Tiger Mom - and it worked

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Some second-semester college seniors are content to phone it in. Lulu Chua-Rubenfeld, on the other hand, just completed a 90-page thesis on Jewish-American identity in early 20th century New York and a 10-page paper on the Shah of Iran. "If I could be the kind of person who could let loose, I would.

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To the person who said "Im too a gifted kid"

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To the person who said "Im too a gifted kid"

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The difference between bright kids and gifted children

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The difference between bright kids and gifted children

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Parents who usually the first to recognise that their child is bright for his or her age, and then aren't sure what to do next - especially as "bright" is not necessarily the same as "gifted." Here the National Association for Gifted Children helps to explain the characteristics of gifted children.

There are many checklists of gifted characteristics. In general they contain several common elements. Compared to other children your child's age, how many of these fit your child?

Reasons well and learn rapidly

Talked early and has extensive vocabulary

Early or avid reader

Asks lots of questions and learns more quickly than others

Has a very retentive memory

Is extremely curious and can concentrate for long periods on subjects of interest

Perseverant in their interests

Has a wide general knowledge and interest in the world

Enjoys problem-solving, often missing out the intermediate stages in an argument and making original connections

Has an unusual and vivid imagination

Is intense and shows strong feelings and opinions

Concerned with justice and fairness

Has an odd sense of humour

Sets high standards and is a perfectionist

Loses interest when asked to do more of the same

Is sensitive (feelings hurt easily)

Shows compassion and is morally sensitive

Has a high degree of energy

Prefers older companions or adults

Judgement mature for age at times

Is a keen observer

Is highly creative

Tends to question authority

Has facility with numbers

Extremely good at jigsaw puzzles

No one will show all these characteristics, but very bright children will fit a significant number of them.

Some parents find it difficult to understand the difference between a bright child, and a gifted child.

The following table hopefully will show how to differentiate between the two

Knows the answers

Asks the questions

Is interested

Is extremely curious

Pays attention

Gets involved physically and mentally

Has good ideas

Has unusual "silly" ideas

Works hard

Plays around, yet tests well

Answers the question

Questions the answers

In the "top" group

Beyond any group

Listens with interest

Shows strong feelings and opinions

Learns with ease

Already knows

Needs 6-8 repetitions to master a concept

Needs 1-2 repetitions to master a concept

Understands ideas

Constructs abstract theories

Enjoys peer group

Prefers the company of adults or older children

Grasps meaning

Draws inferences

Completes assignments

Initiates projects

Is receptive

Is intense

Copies accurately

Creates a new design

Enjoys school

Enjoys learning

Absorbs information

Applies/manipulates information

Is a good technician

Is an inventor

Good at memorising

Good at guessing

Enjoys straight forward sequential presentation

Thrives on complexity

Is alert

Is keenly observant

Is pleased with own work

Is highly self-critical

What can parents and teachers do for the gifted child?

Gifted children often need more support than others, but this does not necessarily mean that they need more structured activities. Sometimes it means they need more freedom and a little more guidance instead.

More able children can be better supported by giving them:

Space to make their own contributions in situations that are open ended

The opportunity to take risks with the possibility of failure in non-threatening and well-organised situations

Contact with other people like them

A share of the teacher's time that is fair, focused and appropriate to their needs

Activities that require them to spend a balance of time both working with urgency and reflecting quietly on their work

Questioning structured to employ their higher-order thinking skills with similar answers to their questions

Minimal instruction when possible, allowing them to use initiative and problem solving skills

Opportunities to develop their work in directions they have chosen themselves

Encouragement to use a range of alternative methods and approaches and organisational and presentation techniques

Work set in ways that involve challenging creativity and imagination

Schemes of work that incorporate starting points for work sometimes with clear steps and sometimes open-ended

An appreciation that social and emotional maturity does not always equate with intellectual ability - asynchronous development

A range of teaching and learning styles - multiple intelligences

Time created to extend, enrich and expand - not to repeat

A range of differentiation and enrichment activities and strategies

The opportunity and time to research for themselves

Living with a gifted child: Having a gifted child is rewarding, exasperating and very hard work. Elaine Hook - herself a teacher - tells us the story of bringing up her daughter, Sophie...

Gifted children and friendships - why don't I fit in? Making friends can be hard at any age. But for gifted children - who don't always fit in easily - they can be harder than ever. Elaine Hook from the National Association of Gifted Children, and herself the mother of a gifted child, explains more....

Why girls bully differently - and what you can do about it: Social exclusion - "my friends won't play with me" - is one of the most common ways for girls to bully. And although it could be seen as just a typical part of growing up, it can lead to serious problems. So what can parents do?

Best homework websites: The Supernanny team has found the best online learning resources to help your child with his homework.

NAGC (the National Association for Gifted Children) is the UK's foremost membership charity that deals with all aspects of giftedness in children. Its Helpline can be contacted on: 0845 450 0221.

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Parents who usually the first to recognise that their child is bright for his or her age, and then aren’t sure what to do next - especially as “bright” is not necessarily the same as “gifted.” Here the National Association for Gifted Children helps to explain the characteristics of gifted children.

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Gifted schools in the United States | OurKids.net

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Discover, analyze, compare, and discuss the top gifted school options. Our United States-focused guide helps you find the right program for your gifted child.

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Anyone watching a group of children playing will see many differences among them. Many of the questions NAGC receives from parents are about children ages 8 and under who are performing at more advanced levels than their peers. After the initial excitement of watching a child learn, parents notice the disparities in children and begin to have questions - Is my child advanced?, How do I make sure there is a continued interest in learning?, and What happens when my child enters school?

There are a few stumbling blocks for parents and educators of gifted young children

Young gifted learners are a heterogeneous group where each child develops skills and abilities at different rates; so while one 4 year old may be able to add and subtract numbers, he may struggle to draw a recognizable house or take turns on the swing.

Teachers and schools are not trained to recognize advanced ability or be able to differentiate to serve this population of young children.

There are few opportunities for outside enrichment during the early years, especially in low-income neighborhoods.

How can parents and teachers nurture a child's interests and strengths?
What can preschool and kindergarten programs do?

Read NAGC's Early Childhood Position Paper

Early Childhood Gifted Education: Fostering Talent Development -- Explores developmentally appropriate talent development in young children at home and in school. An NAGC Select book.

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Anyone watching a group of children playing will see many differences among them. Many of the questions NAGC receives from parents are about children ages 8 and under who are performing at more advanced levels than their peers.