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Why am I taking Sociology 1A this semester?

I am taking this class again after 18 years. I am changing my major to Nursing and I need to take the class to improve my grade from the last time that I took the class. I need to improve my chances of being selected into the program. I left my job as a CMA at Sutter Health  after being there for 5 years. I resigned beginning of this year to pursue my dreams of being a Registered Nurse. In short, that is why I am taking this class again.

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"Sociology is the study of human behavior. Sociology refers to social behaviors , society, patterns of social relationship. social interaction, and the culture that surrounds everyday lift."

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I honestly never knew that reading about Jeans and connecting it to how Sociologist would look at this would alter my outlook on Jeans as a whole. How jeans make us feel, the comfort that it brings when sliding into a pair. Also, the places that Jeans are made and how much they are sold for just from where they are from. Such as Jeans that are made in the U.S. are more likely to be more expensive than jeans that are made from China, which are usually cheaper. Sociologist also looks at how Jeans are made from cotton and the process that it takes to transform them into jeans. There are analysts that suggest that denim, the material that is used to make jeans are most often contaminated with toxic chemicals. I have never looked in depth or have thought about what drives me to buy and consume the food and drinks that I do. I often leave the house and buy new pairs of jeans weekly. I always feel as though I can never have enough comfortable jeans. I love the way it fits, I love the different designs, the fact that they are so affordable at the stores that I go to. When it comes to jean buying, I have an "it's never enough" attitude. I was unaware that when Levi's Jeans were made, they were made to be long-lasting, to protect workers that were working in hard labor jobs. When jeans were looked at as a working class clothing, many of the elites distance themselves from the people that wore jeans because it was considered a "hard labor," uniform. The rich and elite could not have anything or anyone connect them to doing hard labor work. The Elites started wearing impractical clothing, such as; bonnets, high heeled shoes, and corsets, in a way communicating that they didn't have to perform manual labor jobs.
In this chapter it also goes over three thinking frames; Material/Cultural, Structure/Agency, Micro/Macro.
I personally love going to get my coffee at Starbucks. When I do, I know that my friends are going to think that I can afford paying $5.25 for a coffee everyday. When I try to stop drinking Starbucks coffee, I see my group of friends from school drinking it and I don't want to feel left out. Then I go to the Danner Hall and buy a Starbucks coffee. I honestly never connected the fact that there are days that I don't feel like paying over five dollars for a cup of coffee. But due to the fact that it is a name brand coffee that gives me the image of being able to afford to drink that everyday that makes me buy it. I needed to fit in and stand out of my group of friends at the same time. Reading this has given me such clarity.
I tend to buy a lot of things that I don't necessarily need because other people in my circle of friends or family have it.

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I woke up in the morning and completed my morning routine. I always pick up my phone and order me a Green Tea Frap from Starbucks. My morning is not the same if I don't have a Starbucks drink in the morning. That first sip of my drink is just the best feeling ever. A day without my drink when I wake up late and have to rush to work, makes me so upset. I'm grumpy until I am able to go to Starbucks. I have been drinking a Starbucks drink consistently everyday since I was 25 years old. I am now 40 years old. After my morning Starbucks Green Tea frap, I went to Mc Donald's a purchased myself a a breakfast sandwich. It was delicious. Shortly after finishing my sandwich, I went to a DD's Discount store and went shopping. I spent about twenty dollars buying new shirts that I did not need. I feel as though I buy things on routine and not really because I need it. I get a lot of clothing at DD's for cheap, so I feel as though it justifies me buying something from there everyday. This is the only social interaction with other people that I have, other than my husband and my children. My need to buys something everyday is a new thing, it didn't start until we had the Covid-19 Epidemic Lockdowns. I think I have used it as a coping mechanism to make sure I don't run out of clothing and supplies at my home.

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Discussion and Reflection pg.26 The first thing I bought was...

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Discussion and Reflection pg.26 The first thing I bought was...

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The first thing that I ever remember buying was a pack of Juicy Fruit gum from the store. My family background was that I came from a poor family, my parents were immigrant farmers from their country, Cambodia and Thailand. We were on public assistance at the time and they so rarely ever gave us money. When they did, we were suppose to save it up. My parents had five children that they were raising. For some reason this particular day they gave us a dollar each. I begged to go to the store to buy some Juicy Fruit gum, I had just seen the commercial and it looked very appealing to me. I was about 7 years old. I was anxious and excited that I didn't have to ask my parents to buy me anything. It felt good. I took my money out, step to the cashier, he rang up the item, and I handed him the money. I bought the gum. I felt proud of myself. It had to have been the best tasting gum that I had ever chewed at that time.

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After reading this chapter, it gives me a different ways of looking at things. It explains a Sociologist as a Passion and not a Pastime. The part of this chapter that got me is, when he list the specific people who should stay away from Sociology, for example; "people who feel no temptation before closed doors, who have no curiosity about human beings, who are content to admire scenery without wondering about the people who lives in those houses on the other side of that river." I'm the opposite, I looks at people and wonder things about them all of the time. I wonder what motivates people to wear all black and have piercings on their bodies, why people chose to wear flamboyant hair colors, why they have tattoos that covers all their body parts. My mind is constantly wondering about people and what motivated them to do that things that they do. I think that I may be a sociologist!

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One of the most powerful part of reading this was the part was a quote was, "I have never felt that much anger before. If she had resisted, I would have killed her...The rape was for revenge. I didn't even orgasm. She was there to get my hostile feelings off on." (page 23)
For someone that has been a victim of a sexual crime, to hear a perspective from an offender is really disgusting, There are so many social factors that makes a person do what they do. When some people will be upstanding citizens and other may choose to go the criminal route.

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This was a good read for me, something that I can relate to...food! This chapter starts off by talking about food that are revered in some cultures are a delicacy and as a pest in others. It gives examples of Escargot, Spiders, Pufferfish, Horsemeat, and nose to tail eating. I have eaten Escargot and nose to tail eating before, which is eating every part of the animal. Especially with Poor Asian parents, we weren't allowed to waste any parts of the pig, chicken, beef..etc. My parents does not play when it comes to wasting food. This chapter also goes over a story of a woman that loves eating hamburgers. Stating that there are so many ways to eat a hamburger and that it is inexpensive. There's also, " New York Times journalist Mark Bittman who did his own investigation or the "true cost" of a burger. He speaks of the environmental cost, carbon generation, health cost, obesity." That does make you think about the real cost of a burger. There are so may problem or concerns brought in by the industry of beef. I was able to relate to a story in this chapter about a woman that was telling a story about when she was in second grade and how she brought homemade food to eat that was prepared by her mother. There were other students there and they were eating their lunches there also. Almost every student had a white bread sandwiches in the lunch room and an older lunchroom supervisor started making fun of her because she was socially deviance from the others. I remember a time were I was at school, about the same grade as this person. It was bring a food item from the house that you like eating. My parents had just went crawfish fishing and brought back a bucket of crawfish. I love eating crawfish. I took a crawfish and put it in my backpack for show and tell. The school that I went to was a predominately white school. I was about 1 of 4 minorities in this class. Half the class went up to show what they like eating. It was my turn, I went up with my backpack. I noticed that the pocket was unzipped, and it was not in the pocket where I left it. I heard a scream from the teacher as she stomped on something on the ground. It was my crawfish. I ran to it and picked it up and told her that she just stomped and killed my favorite food. I cried after picking up the mangled body of the crawfish and went back to my desk. Some students made fun of me, some were unbothered. The teacher apologized for killing my crawfish, she thought it was an insect.

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After reading about this Nacirema, (which is American spelled backwards) It goes about being invited to the tribes home and seeing things as if it was seen for the first time. He talks of shrines or chest that is built into the walls (medication cabinet) of these peoples houses. The box is filled with charms and magical potion without which no native believes he could live. (medication) The most powerful is the medicine men (pharmacists). I think that this is a clever way to write. It makes you think of what he is describing and see if you can figure out the language.

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Communication is usually thought to be with words, but for most of us communication is non verbal. There was an example given of a man Henry who had an appointment with Arthur and it was at 11:00 and Henry shows up at 11:30, Arthur took that as a unconscious sign Henry didn't the the appointment with him was important. That speaks to me in a way that I don't think that most people care about that are use to being late. I don't how many times I have waited for my husband in the almost 20 years I have been married to him to show up to an appointment that we may have, and he's late. His excuse is that his parents were late for everything and he doesn't feel it necessary to be early for anything. For my self, I was raised in a home that how you show yourself, is who you are. My parents were never late for anything. Matter of fact, they were at least 30 minutes early to every event that we had to attend. My husband says it doesn't mean that his lateness does not reflect his love and concern that he has for what we are doing. I completely disagree, when we set a time and a date for something and you are constantly late, if shows me that you don't care, that it doesn't matter to him.  Not a lot of use know how much nonverbal communication plays such a big role in our everyday lives. Eye contact is so important. "Eyes are used to communicate: dominant vs submission, involvement vs. detachment, and positive vs negative attitude."  (page.111) Our eyes is not like any other organ, it is the extension of our brain. In this chapter, it has an example of a couple that is having some problems in their marriage. The wife is consulting a psychiatrist because she feels like her husband is not interested in her anymore. " He is from New England and was brought up by parents that has taught him to control his emotions. She was raised in an Italian home where it was warm, volatile, and demonstrative. "(page. 116) It talks of how different their backgrounds were, she was more of a comforter and source of strength for him and he was more reserved as a husband, not emotional, not comforting to her emotional needs, the way that she needed him to be. It really made me think to how different my back ground from my husband was. He is more independent, he came from a broken home, him and his two brothers were self sufficient, basically raised themselves. With myself, my parents are together, my parents made sure that they were there for all five of their children. They supported us in every way. When I married my husband, he was head strong, independent, and wasn't an emotional person, but still a really good man. For myself, I felt like the lady in this chapter, I felt as though my husband is not affectionate as he could be, at times it made me feel as though he may not love me, but he does, I have to understand that how we are raised shapes a lot of who we are.

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Clark, Sympathy in Everyday Life 9/10/2020

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Clark, Sympathy in Everyday Life 9/10/2020

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What is Sympathy? " Feeling sorry for or with another person...basic of human society." (page. 118). There are a lot of interesting points in this reading that I didn't, or would have never have thought of. Sympathy credit was an eye opener. You see it everyday, I have even been guilty of that myself. Offering my condolences to people in stacking up sympathy credit for when I go through something. My most recent example was when my parents were recently diagnosed with COVID-19. After the initial shock of the news from my mom. I had prayed with my husband. Then  my next thought was to go to my therapist "Facebook" to announce the news. As if my social media friends can sympathize with what I had been going through. I had hundreds of " I'm sorry to hear," "Things will get better, " "rely on God," "I'm here for you if you need anything." I was essentially begging or wanting sympathy from others to not only help me through this hard time, but people were building their sympathy credit with me. The only thing for me to do was to show people that I was grateful for their comments and  positivity. There were times that I was on Facebook, when one of my 300 plus friends were having life crisis such as; divorce, deaths in family, loss of jobs, hopelessness, break ups, illness...etc My natural instinct is to tell them that I'm sorry for what they are going through and pray that God will help them with their problems. I was collecting Sympathy credit. In learning about sympathy credit I also read that just like any account you can over use your credit. It give examples of the boy who cried wolf. He had sympathy from the people. When he would cry wolf. After a couple times of him crying wolf, his credit depleted. The sympathy credit was essentially in overdraft, the trust was no longer there for him. Even when people are going through hard times, if its a continued problem or it last for too long, people risks receiving less sediments.
This chapter also shows how unequal things are, for example if a woman was having car problems, she would receive more sympathy then a man with car problems. He is suppose to be more knowledgeable with cars and maintenance. In the story about my parents with COVID-19 diagnosis, one of my friends checked up on me every other day. She had empathy for my situation and was very encouraging during those times. She earned a lot of credit with me, not only for that but that our relationship was a pretty close one. Recently, her husband was diagnosed with COVID-19, and is not doing well in the hospital. She did not tell anyone. I saw a post from her and text her that " I'm sorry for what she is going through, I sent my love and prayers to her husband. I was showing her the same amount of love and care she showed me with my parents. Unknowingly, I was giving back the Sympathy credit that she has been stacking up with me with her kind actions. Sociology is starting to make me think about things that I don't think that I would have ever looked at in that way. Its an interesting experience.

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Contrasting Durkheimian and Marxists Perspective page 50

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Contrasting Durkheimian and Marxists Perspective page 50

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Marx concept here was commodity fetishism,  which is particularly useful for our relationship with food." (page 36) Marx is basically saying that we as a whole don't necessarily want to know how our food was made or the labor that it took to form living, breathing chickens to what we consume which are chicken nuggets. An example that was used was Charlie and the Chocolate factory. He talks about the fact that the workers in the cocoa industries are children. Most of the children are enslaved. He puts that most of us has eaten chocolate in our lifetime, chocolate is a product of slaves and children workers. Durkheim on the other hand states that food is a Totem. It brings us together to function as a cohesive whole. I love mash potatoes and gravy. It makes me happy when I eat it and it reminds me of the holidays of my whole family coming together. In this chapter, it gives and example of Thanksgivings, One of my favorite holidays. I get to eat all the mash potatoes that I want to eat. In Marx eyes, I would know what he would say about potatoes. Maybe that farmer spend all day out in the sun to grow and harvest potatoes and I don't even see what the farmers do everyday for us to have fresh produce at the stores for us to purchase.

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Mandatory Post: Write something from modern culture the way that Minor saw it.

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Mandatory Post: Write something from modern culture the way that Minor saw it.

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I was invited to eat with the chief and his family, the chiefs wife was going to prepare a meal for us. I watched as she picked up a huge red bug out of the water, it was huge and it looked hideous. She then dropped it in the hot water. She cooked about five of those bugs for everyone. She then placed one of those cooked water critters on my plate. I was so scared of it, now its turned into a pinkish color. I was a little apprehensive but I ate it. When we were done eating, I noticed that the woman gathering  up all the plates and carefully placed it into a box the with a magically button made them clean., that left me scratching my head.  I was also invited to follow the chiefs wife for the day to she what she does in a given day. Her home was filled with magical boxes that clean. She gathered up all the the clothes on the floor and threw it into another magic box and added some magic potion in with the clothes also to enhance the cleaning magic. In the afternoon, we travelled to a shop. She sat down and another lady started touching the chiefs wife hands. She took a wood like object and scrapped it across her nails. The lady pulled out a box of claws. She then proceeded to connect the claws to the chiefs wife nails. She using a magic liquid to put the claws on to her nails. When the lady was done with the ritual she brought out a jar with blood in it. The red was so bright in color. She proceeded to paint the claws with the blood that was in the jar. The chiefs wife was excited with how her claw extension looked. Overall if was a strange day for me.

( I was invited to my bosses house for meal. She prepared lobster for me to eat with her family. After we ate she collected the dishes and carefully put it in the dishwasher. She proceeded o take me about for the day. She picked up clothes from around the house. She put the dirty clothes in the washer and put the detergent in and started it. After that we went to the nail shop. She say down and had nails done. The manicurist added acrylic to her names. After she put it on, she then pulled out the red nail polish and painted her new long nails red. )

Hope it was a good story. I surely tried my best!

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Mandatory Post: Does Good teachers lead to better learning?

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Mandatory Post: Does Good teachers lead to better learning?

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I think that you can't measure a good teachers in connection with better learning. I know that my son has some of the best teachers in his 8th grade classes and yet is not doing well in those classes. He struggles with ADHD and had a learning disability. It is hard for him to stay focused and on track. His teachers are good teachers and my son is a smart kid. There are factors and obstacles in his life that makes it harder for him to learn. Also a way that a teacher teaches is not always how his students learns. People learn in all different ways. Some are; Visual, Auditory, Verbal, Physical, Logical, Social, Solitary. A teacher may only teach in a way that helps out visual learners or auditory learners, what about the other learners? That is why you can't measure a good teacher and say that it is equal to better learning.

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APPENDIX: Advertising and Society Page 400-424

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APPENDIX: Advertising and Society Page 400-424

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In this chapter, it talks about advertising and how to appeal to the group that they are trying to reach. The book gives an example of whether or not student will apply to a college based on watching a commercial with classical music in the background or dance music. If I had to choose between a commercial for either music in the back ground and possibly applying for that school, I would chose the one with dance music myself. The people that heard the classical music felt like it was to expensive and sophisticated. The dance music in the commercial made the school seem like it was a party type of school. It also made it seem less expensive.
I think If I was to do my own research, I would do it on do they feel like order of birth with the children in a family and does it effect the responsibility over other siblings. Also does sex of the first child determine more responsibility over their siblings. I would start of with that question and do a small group of 30 people that I meet. 15 boys and 15 girls and give them a questionaire on the topic. First I would ask them if they have any siblings. If they do, I would give them one to fill out, if not, they wouldn't get one.
If someone handed me a questionaire, on that question, I would write that I am the second of five kids, that I am a woman and that I do feel like the sex and order of birth does matter in the responsibility level over young siblings. I would collect the data and make a graph on the information collected.

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Pages 29-43

In doing any kind of research, you have to come up with a question that you would like answered. That may be one of the most important part of the whole research. In this chapter, he goes over symbolic interactionism and the three major themes;
1. Humans being have a self, we think, we talk, we reflect on things. We think about other people and their motives. "making the self and object" (page 31)
2. People construct meanings and act on the basis of those meanings.  Its basically how we react to things within our own views. He gives and example of someone contacting someone physically. Some may see that as normal, others may look at it like a push or a shove, some people may even take that as a big disrespect (gang members) and you can possible end up dead for such an infraction.
3.  People take into account the reactions of others.
example: I have seen so many items at a store that I literally could have walked out with when a fight broke out in a Walmart. But, the only thing that I can think of at that very moment was how my mom would be so disappointed in me for doing that. She would call me an opportunist.
He also disgust divorce and why it is so prevalent in our society. How we have moved away from the traditions of family, children, taking care of the sick and our elders. Now it is easier to bring our elderly family members to a retirement home or a care facility.  Therefore it makes us not have "ties to bind " couples together. "Husbands and wives don't have obligations to hold them together and it is easier to just break up" (Henslin, page 33)

Further in the chapter, he tells the story of a girl names Renee, that gets raped. The story doesn't go out and says that she is raped, but common sense tells us that she has been raped.
He goes over the research model and the steps that it goes into a research steps.
1. Selecting a Topic to do the research on. Something that we would want to know more about.
2. Defining the Problem- We have to develop researchable questions.
3. Reviewing the Literature-  to do our research, to look to see what has been published about our topic.
4. Formulating a Hypothesis- A statement of what you expect to find based on your theory.
5. Choosing a research Method- the way in which we collect the data.
6. Collecting Data- you have to make sure that your data is both valid and reliable.
7. Analyzing the Results- after you gather your data, it is time to analyze them.
8. Sharing the Results- wrapping up the result, write a report of your findings.

With the story of Renee, I definitely am able to relate to her story. When you go through whether rape, molestation, any unwanted contact, it will effect you for a long time. Through research, we are able to see that most rapes that happen in the United States are by people that the victim knows. I personally know that to be true.

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Pages 63-72 Devah Pager

Would I hire an Ex-Convict? My answer would be, Strong maybe. It also depends on what the record was for. I'm not surprised with what I read about ex-convicts of color generally have a harder time finding employment. I have a lot of family members that have been to prison. Some of them for reasons such as; drunk driving, armed robbery to domestic violence. All have served their time and have been released from prison. Many of them have tried to walk the straight line. They have applied for jobs, with little success.
The statistics don't lie. Blacks with no criminal records gets a only 14% call back per application that they return, with a criminal record that number drops to 5%. There's a better percentage when it comes to white men. White men that do not have a criminal record have a 34% call back change. White men with a criminal record have a 17% call back rate. White men still have a higher rate of call back then black me without a criminal record. It continues to contribute to social inequality in this world.
I'm married to a black man and he tells me all the time that jobs are hard to come by when you don't have a criminal record. I see that all the time. He has family that have been applying for jobs, even in construction, where its almost "ok" to have a criminal background and even with experience, his family member has been overlooked by employers to hire someone that is white with a criminal record. Many of his family does go back to the life of crime, the only life that they know in desperation to provide for themselves. In every social problem, there are never clear black and white answers. For myself, I wouldn't automatically disqualify a person for a criminal record, especially if they are trying to change their lives and are hard workers.

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"Being the only Christian is and Non Christian family"

I have been called an outsider for more days then I care to remember. Simply because I am the only Christian person in my family of Buddhist. I have been made fun of and ridiculed for going against the grain of generations of Buddhist. I believe that one should be able to choose who they serve as far as religion is concerned.
I have never felt more like an outsider than recently are my grandfather funeral. I have made it known to my family years ago that I will go to the funerals but I will not be a part of any praying or chanting by the monks that are there. To me, there are spirits that can attempt to attach themselves to my husband, myself and my children. When the monks started chanting, we got up and walked away. We informed family that it is not a sign of disrespect, it is not what we believe and my parents understood, so I thought. At one point in the ceremony all of my grandparents children went up one by one with their mates and children to be blessed by the monks. They called my mom up and my family went and my mom called for me to go up to my grandfather casket, so that the monks can bless us. As my husband held my hand in support, I said "no mom, you already know where I stand." She was clearly upset. It was so hard to go against generations of family members looking at me with such disapproval. I know that my family believe in reincarnation. I know that they think that you can go to heaven after death with prayer from your family. I understand that people will believe what they want to. For me to go against my family and say that God is my Lord and Savior, was hard, even with the family being upset, I wouldn't change a thing.

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Page. 105 JCB

I went to Starbucks to observe people and how they interact and socialize with one another. To my surprise, there were chairs and tables outside of this Starbucks. With precautions given out by the Governor, regarding Covid-19, the inside of Starbucks is only open for customers for pick up or take out only. I went in to order my usual Venti Green Tea Frappuccino as I do everyday. I got my drink and went outside in the new patio area and sat down by myself. It was a slow day for dine orders. People did not want to get out of their cars. It was bad for my research, but a good thing at the same time, It gave me a little time to catch up with my reading for my class.
At their drive thru, it was pretty busy. I think that people were still surprised that there was actually a place to sit and relax outside.
I was excited to see two young ladies walk by from different directions and embraced one another. Clearly friends and very comfortable with each other as they locked arms and went into the coffee shop. About 5 to 8 minutes later they came to the patio area with their coffees. If I had to guess their ages I would say that they were in their early to mid 20's. One of the girls was Asian and her friend was White. The Asian lady was wearing blue jeans, a white t shirt and tennis shoes. They White lady was wearing blue jeans, a black t shirt and black sandals. I was dress almost exactly like the lady with a black shirt. They both sat down at the table right next to me. We were six feet apart, but I can hear their loud conversation from where I was sitting. They were definitely close friends. Their body language was as they had known each other for along time. The White lady was asking her friend how she has been, it has been a week since they have seen each other. She had also reminded the Asian lady that they use to meet up everyday, before having lives and relationships of their own.  They proceeded to talk about careers, school, family and pets, then it came to the subject of relationships and the Asian lady's love life. She has been dating someone for almost a year and was unsure about the relationship, as she drank her dark looking ice coffee, and dribbled a little on her white shirt. She took a napkin and tried to absorb the coffee with no change, there was a line of dark colored coffee down her shirt. "Great, she said, I am so clumsy." She then starts to talk about her relationship. She starts off the conversation after being distracted by the coffee spilling, "Where was I?" Oh yeah, that's right, She tells her friend that her boyfriend is a really jealous person and that he hates it when she goes out, especially with her friends. She states that, " He thinks that I am going to be influenced to cheat on him by any of my friends." She sounded like she was ready to end things with this person, but she didn't know how. She also told her friend that if he was not at work right now, that she would have not been able to come and see her friend.  Her friend asked if she was happy and she said, " No, he doesn't even want
" us" (her and the friend that she is out for coffee with) to talk." The her friend was not shocked at the comment. She sat back and looked at her friend and told her that she would support her decision, in whatever she decided to do. I felt kind of bad for the girl. Especially because I was looking at their every move and also the fact that I can hear everything that they were saying so clearly. The Asian lady stated that she already knows that she is going to end the relationship, but doesn't know what reaction that she will get from the boyfriend. Listening intently her friend took a butter knife and cut into the lemon pound cake. When she did that it told me that she was raised in a higher class type of family. It was also the way that she carried herself when she was sitting there. I would have taken that pound cake and crammed it into my mouth, as much as I could've in that moment, but that was me. Back to the two ladies conversation, The Asian lady looked at her watch and noticed that it was getting late. She said that he will be home in about thirty minutes or so and she had to get back to the house. She was obviously rattled. They both got up and her friend walk her to her car. They held hands by the car as a sign of support and they gave each other a hug. I didn't want to read into if the reason why the Asian lady was in such a hurry to go home was because she seem scared of her boyfriend. Unusually scared as if there are some signs of domestic problems between them. They both ended up getting into their respective cars and drove off. I finished my drink and got up and left. I enjoy people watching. I like to hear peoples conversations. I often drive by other cars, in traffic and see people talking and often wonder what they are talking about. This experiment was a little different. I hate to think that there are woman out there that might be going through some domestic violence and I can't do anything about it. The conversation between them was definitely uncomfortable.

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9/25/2020
3 EXAMPLES OF:
ACQUIRED STATUS
ACHIEVE STATUS

ACHIEVED:
Certified Medical Assistant
Mother
Wife

ASCRIBED:
Asian
Daughter
Woman

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Page.287 JCB

Material/Cultural: The Material objects in our lives are deeply linked to our sense of self. Our possession become invested with meaning and provide a key symbolic resource for communicating out identified to others. This relationship differs across cultural context.

Think about... What material objects are most significant to your sense of self, and how do you think they reflect the cultural values you are immersed in?

I am an avid purse collector since I started working. My favorite brand is Coach. There is something about buying a brand new purse that make me feel good about myself. Its not only that. Its the feeling of having the "latest" purse that just came out. The looks of envy that I get from girls that are my family and friends.
They call my the "Coach Girl," I have accepted that title. I rarely ever spend money on myself, but when it comes to Coach purses for a great price, I'm all over it. The purse that I get are from the Livermore Outlets. They are generally 50-75% off when
I see it. I don't tell anyone about the deals that I get on the purse. I want to keep the image of a person that afford expensive purses. When I was growing up, my parents had five kids. We wore hand me downs. If we were to ever get anything new, such as clothing or shoes, it would be on our birthdays or Christmas. I vowed then that I would never let anyone know that I came from a family with no money. My dad was a hardworking man and my mom was a stay at home mom. When I was younger, I couldn't see the sacrifice that my parents had to make. I just knew that my friends could afford the new clothes and the Jordan shoes. As I got older, I would go couponing and buy things at bulk. Even when I was single. I never wanted to know that feeling of going without again. I have amassed so many things such as: laundry detergent, toilet paper, water, cleaning supplies, tooth paste, bleach, dish soap...etc I save my family hundreds and hundreds of dollars in order to buy my Coach purses.  When I didn't have a Coach purse, I was made to feel like an outsider, that I couldn't afford it, or that my husband didn't seem me worthy of buying me expensive purses. I couldn't feel like that again.
In reading this chapter, when they spoke of kids and Pokemon cards, I saw my son, I can see the same thing is happening to him. Now that he is 13 years old, he is an avid Pokemon collector. He has about 2500 cards. They are not cheap. He started collecting the card 3 years ago at 10 years old. It all started when his friends had cards and he was not included in play because he didn't have his own cards. He felt so badly about himself that I tried to cheer him up. That didn't work. He brought up the fact that he felt rejected and not part of the crowd and I understood what he meant. I was also the same way when I couldn't buy my own clothing and had to wear hand me downs from my older sister. Then I bought him his first box of 5 packs of Pokemon card. After that, he has been working and doing chores for those cards. He wanted to make sure that he had the most card out of his friends. Within the birthdays and Christmas's his countless of aunts and uncles have not only given him hundreds of cards but hundreds of dollars to support his obsession. He has definitely created a cultural context where these cards are valued. We have spent to much of our life promoting these brands. Whether we knew it or not, these companies are winning big time with out financial support.

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Goffman, The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life.

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Goffman, The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life.

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page 135-145  9/27/2020

We often want to present ourselves in the best light possible. For myself, I use to go around my grandparents, I would go around them and be on my best behavior. I would greet them so sweetly while I run pass them. There were so many aunts and uncles that lived there, I always had to put on the best show ever, as far a behavior. I always thought that my aunts and uncles had their eyes on me, the whole time that I was there. But in reality, they were worried about their own kids and their own situations. I felt the act that we put on in pubic is pretty much wasted. I remember recently thinking to myself while I was out, I would wear shorts. For me, that was a big deal. I don't shorts. I hate the way that my legs. I have bruises and varicose veins that pops out. I kept looking at people that were looking down as if they were looking at my legs and judging me. My kids kept telling me that they were looking at something else, but it was the insecurities of how disgusted I felt about my legs that made me so paranoid that people were looking. Its like someone that has a pimple. People may not notice that they have one until they pop it and its bleeding or put a good size band aid on it. So what people are trying to avoid, they are actually bringing it to light and making it obvious for people to notice. "To summarize, then I assume that when a individual appears before others they will have many motives for trying to control the impression they receive of the situation. (Goffman, 145)

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249-264: Thompson, Handling the Stigma of Handling the Dead.  (HENSLIN)

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249-264: Thompson, Handling the Stigma of Handling the Dead.  (HENSLIN)

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9/28/2020

When I was in Medical Assisting School, my Biology teacher told me something that I would never forget. She told me that "as long as there are people out there that is sick and dying, I would always have a job." In reading about the business of death, it makes sense. With life, everyday that we live, we are closer to dying. That is inevitable. Recently my grandfather passed away. He was 96 years old. Police officers and Nurses were there to confirm his death. They informed the family that we will only have an hour before the people at the funeral home was going to be there to pick him up. Sure enough, right at the hour mark,  there were two men dressed professionally in black suits rolling in a gurney. They put my grandfather in the black body bag and zipped him up in there. The gave us their condolences and took my grandfathers body into the van to bring him to the funeral home.
I thought to myself, "Where are they bringing him?", "What were they going to do to his body?" "Will they take care of his body?" So many thoughts went through my mind. After reading this, It shows me the business of death and how funeral homes and workers have so much stigma attached to what they do. Making money off of peoples grief. In my parents country, a death in the family use to be handled by that deceased family members. Family, especially the woman would clean the body and dress the deceased. The coffin would be made by the men in the family, they also handled the digging of the persons final resting place. After the 3-5 days of celebration of life, they will bury their family members body.
Times have changed, family don't deal with the prepping of their deceased family members. I know about the teaching of Emotional detachment with the funeral homes. My friend worked at a funeral home for over ten years. She was told that she has to be emotionally detached from the situation. If she was to get emotional, that it would distract the grieving family. She had told me after all these years she still has to step out and take a breath. Especially anything that had to do with a child or babies. For myself, I have worked in the medical field for about the same amount of time that my friend has been working at the funeral home. I worked in the OBGYN Department. I have seen moms one day and gone the next, dying at child birth. I have see moms lose their babies at the end of their pregnancy. I was told my my doctor to not be so connected that I forget that there are other woman depending on us as a team to help them. Every business has their stigmas. Dealing with death is no different. We need to have people that also look at death as a job. Not all of us can do a job like that. I give them credit for handling dead bodies and prepping them for viewing and their funeral. Just like any business, I don't agree with charging so much money for caskets and trying to make things package deals just to mark up their services 400%. That is just wrong, it just makes me see why there is such a big stigma with this industry. Its all about the sale. They all have to remember that eventually, we will be on the other end of life and I truly believe that people will reap what they sew.

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 (JCB)  Chapter 5:  Shopping/Social Order

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 (JCB)  Chapter 5:  Shopping/Social Order

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Shopping for "we-ness":
Can you think of a time that you purchased something because you wanted to fit in with a group? How did this item convey your membership in a group? Did this purchase end up satisfying your desire for belonging?

I remember that my parents told me when I was starting to drive to think about what car I wanted to buy. My family was a "Honda" family. I really liked a Nissan. My parents had a condition that if you were to want a Honda that, they will help you buy one, as a gift. They did that with four out of their five children. I was the exception that did not want to buy a Honda. I wanted a Nissan. I saved up 2500.00 for my first car. My parents found nice Honda for me for 3000.00. I went ahead and purchased it. It made my parents very proud of me, since everyone in my family had a Honda, it made me part of the crowd.
Everyone in my family were so happy with my decision. We were one big Honda Family. I felt accepted into the group. After the purchase, I thought that I would feel better in buying the car, and being apart of the family. As if they would have disowned me for buying some other make car. I wanted to make a decision as a grown up. Even though I know that Honda's are good car. I just felt peer pressured into being accepted by the group. At the end, it was a great purchase. The car ended up lasting me for well over 10 years before I traded it in for another band new Honda at a dealership. I have been with a Honda since I started driving. I now have just upgraded from a 2016 Honda Accord to a 2020 Honda Accord.

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(H)      269-276: Meyer, If Hitler Asked You to electrocute a Stranger, would you? Probably

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(H)      269-276: Meyer, If Hitler Asked You to electrocute a Stranger, would you? Probably

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If Hitler asked me to electrocute a stranger, I believe that I would. Based on the simple fact that my parents raised me to respect authority figures to a fault. When my parents were living in Cambodia, They had to go through something very similar to what the Jews went through with Hitler. This man, for the lack of a better world, and the Khmer Rouge came into power about the mid 1970's, It was when the communist first became active in Cambodia. The Khmer Rouge was a brutal regime that rule over Cambodia. There leader was named Pol Pot. He wanted to create a "master race" in Cambodia. Killing Cambodians but the hundreds of thousand. My parents witnessed children killing their parents, parents killing their children, family members order to show their loyalty by killing whomever the soldiers hand picked to be executed. My parents were in refugee camps. Fleeing from being persecuted. My parents are terrified of authority figures. Especially what they are capable of.
My parents have always brought the memories of seeing people that they loved, shot and killed out animals in the street. My parents instilled in all five of their kids to never step outside the box and do as you're told by any authority figure, because that may be your life. I do see myself, if I was in Germany during the Hitler era, I feel as though I can electrocute someone. I know that it may sound horrible. It is one of those things, never say never. Never say that you would not do something so horrible until it's your life that hangs in the balance. In a lot of cases, just like my parents in Cambodia, if you don't conform, you die.

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9/30/2020

Name a situation where you have been effected by obedience to authority or group conformity.

I remember when my father fixed my car. He was so excited, he told me to "push it." What he meant by that was to take it on the freeway and speed and see how the car was running now. That was exactly what I did. I drove that car so fast on the freeway. I went about 100 mph. I also had a stereo system installed in my car also. So as I was speeding on the freeway, I also had my radio turned up. I was going so fast that I didn't hear the Sirens of the police car behind me. It took me a long time before I saw the flashing red and blue lights behind me. This would be the first time that I have ever been pulled over. I didn't even know where I was suppose to pull over. I went completely off the freeway and he use his intercom system on his radio to give me instruction on where to park. I was so scared. I rolled my window down and looked up at the shining of the flash light in my eyes. There was a police officer that stood about 6'6'' standing by my car. Just on looks alone her was intimidating in size. He asked me "Did you not see me following you?" I cried, I told him that I didn't see or hear his sirens. He said he followed me passing 3 exits before I noticed his flashing lights. He also informed me that he was calling for back up and that they would have arrested me if I didn't pull over. He said, "Young lady, you were going about 102 mph at your fastest." I continued to cry. He asked me for my license and registration. I was shaking, I was opening up every compartment in my car looking for it. I ended up finding it in my wallet. He went to his squad car and told me that he will be right back. He went to his car for what seemed like was years waiting there. Then he returned to the side of my car and said "I usually don't give people breaks, but I will give you a tickets and I will put that you were going about 85 mph. He stated that he remembered when he was young and excited about a car." He said that if he was to give me the ticket of my actual speed, I would have ended up with 2 points on my records automatically. I didn't know what that meant, I said said, "Thank you." and left. I was so scared. I didn't want to give him my license or registration, but being that he had the flashlight shinning in my face with his hand placed on top of his gun, I had no choice. That was my the time that I had to be obedient to an authority figure, and I feel a sense of panic when a police officer passes me.

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 (JCB)   Chapter 3:  Fast Food/Work and Economy

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 (JCB)   Chapter 3:  Fast Food/Work and Economy

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Does working in certain low wage setting feel better (less exploitative) when there are positive feelings associated with the employer?

I think that it does make a person feel better when working for an employer with a good reputation. I know that people use to always say to me that, "Man you work for Sutter Gould Medical Foundation?" I would be so happy to say yes. Sutter has had a great reputation in the community. I literally live down the street from the big building in Stockton.
My family would brag about me working as a Certified Medical Assistant there. We had a good community. Definitely a good place to work for. It wasn't the best pay, there were now unions for Sutter but, just working there made you feel good about yourself. A sense of "I made it!" Compared to the other MA jobs that I had prior to working at Sutter.
I know that there was a lot of people that were not happy at what we were making per hour. We have friends that worked at the competition down the street (Kaiser Permanente) that were making at least eight to ten dollars more an hour. They also had the same benefits as us. For me, I wished that I would have made more money. The benefits to me, was worth so much more. My health benefits covered for my family of four at no cost. Dental and vision together were fifteen dollars a check. Which honestly was nothing.
Working for someone with a great reputation it makes you appear a certain way. I use to wear my badge everywhere. It was my badge of honor. People use to ask me so many questions. It really made me feel good. Many people do apply and a small percentage of people get into my position after pre employment testing.

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(H)  411-424: Ehrenreich, Nickeled and Dimed

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(H)  411-424: Ehrenreich, Nickeled and Dimed

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Many of us wouldn't know how to survive off the bare minimum. Having to struggle to live off of very little.  A lot of my "middle-class" friends would be appalled at what my family use to live off of. After reading of how Barbara the author going undercover and leaving everything that she knows for her comfortable life and living for  month in low paying minimum paying jobs. She is a middle class journalists, entering the world of poverty. She allows herself to take Thirteen hundred dollars for her rent, food and other items that she may need, before she finds employment. She worked at a dinner and finds it hard to survive off of her wages and tips, so she gets another job, working for another dinner. She is balancing her life with these two minimum wage jobs. She is exhausted. She meets up with people at her jobs and tells us about their poor living condition. But she finds herself building a bond with these people. She talks to them and discovers that they are hard working people. Stuck in a "dead end, low skill job." She finally gets her dream job as a housekeeper for a hotel. She is cleaning rooms, bed stripping and vacuuming. It was hard work lugging a thirty pound vacuum around. She says that the house keeper picks up large trash to avoid vacuuming the floors. the bare minimum in cleaning.  The people that accepts the low paying jobs don't take these jobs because they want to, they take these jobs because it's a need.
Even living in poverty, many of the people that she worked with are unable to live in their own homes, some are in living situations that are not good for them because of toxic relationships that they are in. They aren't able to move out because with what little they make, it is impossible to live alone. She shows respect to the woman that are mothers, that have to pay for daycare, on welfare that are working to balance out a life for them and their families. She was doing everything for herself and she was exhausted. Trying to earn enough money to make it. I remember living in an apartment complex that were filled with families in the same situation as my parents. Immigrants, non English speaking, welfare recipient, working low skill jobs in the fields picking vegetables. There were a lot of bad things that were happening in that apartment complex. One of the good things was that everyone there were going through the same struggles. They understood how bad things were. When a neighbor had a little extra, they shared with one another. We use to have cookouts and get togethers once a month with different families making at least one dish for the event. That is that one thing that "Barbara discovered as a redeeming feature was that the most abject low-wage work-the camaraderie of the people who are, in almost all cases, far too smart and funny and caring for the work that they do and the wages that they're paid." (page 424) That is what I have learned a long time ago from my mom. She started from the " Welfare to Work Program" over 25 years ago, working at a hospital as a Housekeeper/Janitor. She has went through people mistreating her for being a low class citizen, barely speaking English, with
little education. She worked hard. She is an example of my biggest success story, from welfare, minimum wage job, to a house in the Spanos Area worth over four hundred thousand. I will always remember what she said to me. " You don't ever judge a person for what they do for work, no matter how disgusting, trivial, or little the job is. You don't know that struggles that they have been through to get there. Be grateful that they are there to do it. What you judge someone by is their heart." She definitely had a big one.

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(H)  497-507: Leidner, Over the Counter at McDonald's

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(H)  497-507: Leidner, Over the Counter at McDonald's

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From coming from more simple times as travelling with a group of thirty to forty people, as hunters and gatherers. We use to live as Nomads travelling to where the foods source was. To learning how to grow our own foods and domesticating animals. People started settling down in an area and making their living situations more permanent. People learned how to build tools, knives, metals, leading to surplus that lead to trading these items with one another. As technology grew, it became more of a society that had a surplus of items. Fast forward to today. The best example of how times have advanced over the years is the need for things right away. People have very little patience when it comes to getting their food. When before people use to to hunting for days without even catching animal to eat. Now a days McDonalds is the best example of getting your food fast and most of the times, correct. McDonalds takes the thinking out of work.  Every part of working their has been carefully calculated. From front counter with the register to the time that it takes to cook the fries, to how to smile or interact with the customers to make it a fast transaction. McDonalds strives to serve products of uniform quality. It always has to be the same, every time. My aunt use to work for McDonalds for 15 years. I would always see her dress exactly the same way leaving the house. She would have her uniform, wash, cleaned and ironed. She was a store manager for the company.
My aunt also went through the McDonalds University and graduated. I honestly thought that she was kidding. I have been eating McDonalds off and on for the last Thirty plus years. The service has always been the same and the food has never changed. The quality that they strive is above many companies that I know. To have a McDonalds University? That means that you take your business seriously to ensure that consistent quality with their service. There are always the exceptions of some stores that have Managers and employees that "sometimes" follows the McDonalds standards. Especially with the low pay and low kill position that they are in. To many its just a means to an end. Many people that works for McDonalds wants benefits and sick leave, but the jobs are considered part time. I like the way McDonalds is organized. With every big company, I know that the people looked at as expendable. No matter how good a person is working there. McDonalds have gotten to the point where things are so factory liked that anyone can be placed there to greet customers, make the good and run the stores. They have taken the thinking out of that job and from how I have seen employee treated, the value out of their workers.

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(H)   535-546: Wishard, Caught Between the Ages

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(H)   535-546: Wishard, Caught Between the Ages

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I remember being in class in High School and my teacher looking out to the  plus students that he was teaching and asking us if any of us spoke another language. Of course I lifted my hand up. There were more than half of us that did. I speak English, Khmer, Laos and Thai at the time. My parents did not speak the same language when they wed. My mom is Laos and Thai and my Father is Cambodian and Chinese. That's just a little of my back ground. My teacher, looked at us and said, "Don't you guys ever lose that!" He wanted us to keep our culture, customs, religion and language. He told us that the same morals and values are not being kept by families that comes to the United States from other countries. I honestly thought that he was kind of crazy a little. I have seen the shift of that in my family personally. My siblings are the only ones that fluently speaks our language. We all have children and there are ten grandchildren that my parents have out of there five children. There are no grandchildren that speaks any of the multiple languages that we speak. All of my parents children have gone on to marry people that aren't Asian. We are married  to Black or Mexican people.
My parents thought it would be easier for them to speak English because all their grandchildren were of mixed race and the primary language that spoke was English in the homes. When we were growing up my parents spoke their language to us because that's all that they spoke. That was all that they knew. So we ended up speaking their language. My parents would always take us around their family members that only spoke their language and that was how we learned. All the siblings feels bad that our children don't speak our languages or have the same Asian morals and values that we were taught. When I was young we bow to great our elders, we never touch our elders head, we didn't eat before our parents, we either ate as a family and talked about our day, or we ate nothing at all.
I have at least tried to teach this to my children, recently saw my 8 year old daughter walk pass my mom sitting at the dinner table and touched her head. I was so embarrassed, my slapped her hand and said, "You don't do that, it's disrespectful!" My daughter has been told many times that touching an elders head is a no no. My daughter started crying and my mom said, "That is why we are disappearing as people, with are value and beliefs because you all have married people out of our race and ethnic group." With my family I have definitely seen a shift of people my age speaking our language and to todays generation where it's slowly disappearing.
Something that also caught my attention in this chapter was the climbing rates of mental health issues . Mainly with the onrushing changes in the world. There are a lot to adapt to in such a little period of time. It that employers are concerned about now, "that they have to have that as a benefit. Its not the fastest component of corporate health insurance programs." (page 542)  "Suicide rates for woman has climb 200%, in the past two decades." (542) Teen suicide rates jumped 300% between 1960-1990." Books are written for eight and nine year old children advising them to recognize the symptoms of stress." (542) I have never seen so many kids since I was young on anti-depressants and ADHD medication either. The shift of more technology, robots and less of human beings is only going to get worst. The change is going to be to much for some to handle. People are taking God of out their lives and looking at themselves as Gods will not ever lead a good change.

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Mandatory Post: Look in our closet or our clothing that we have on to see what country that your clothing are from.

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Mandatory Post: Look in our closet or our clothing that we have on to see what country that your clothing are from.

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My closet is close to my bed. I hand picked 5 shirts and 2 pants and non of my clothing are made   made in the United States. The majority of my clothing are from China, Cambodia or Thailand. It goes to show us that items are being made cheaper in other countries. The reason why clothing is being made outside the United States is because of Cheap labor, people make below minimum wage per hour. There are no safety regulations, no overtime, no environment regulations. People are working in unsafe conditions. There are children that work in these sweat shops making clothes for pennies an hour or not being paid at all.
These big companies are getting big tax breaks in having clothing and items from other countries. For not too much longer, we are not going to have jobs. Everything is moving to a more technological world.

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Required entry: JCB p. 79 Corporate Ideologies

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Required entry: JCB p. 79 Corporate Ideologies

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The Corporate brand that I chose was Starbucks. Surprise! Actually, for me and anyone that knows me, that is not really a big surprise. I love Starbucks. The drinks are delicious and stores are clean and the customer service is also great, (most times). The Mission statement of Starbucks is, " To inspire and nurture the human spirit - once person, one cup  and one neighborhood at a time." Their Purpose statement is " To establish Starbucks as the premier purveyor of the finest coffee in the world while maintaining our uncompromising principles while we grow." Wow, now that is very deep. I never knew that they had either statements until I looked t up. The lessons that they are trying to teach is that they want to be an inspiration to our day. They want to treat each and every one of their millions of customers as important. Serving them and making sure that they are not only serving our bodies and our spirits also. From my family members that works at Starbucks, they always tell me that they love working for Starbucks. The pay is ok. It's definitely not minimum wage. The hours are given based on how the stores is doing and on peak selling times. My niece states that they hardest part about working for Starbucks is that no matter how she is feeling that day, she is not allowed to speak about anything negative. She is suppose to stand there, take orders and collect money with a great big smile.
If a customer is unhappy with her  performance and calls the store or main 1-800 number, she can be written up for not serving the best smile. She states that it is really unrealistic to be happy all the time, but that is what Starbucks is selling. Service with a smile, EVERY TIME!!!
Working at Starbucks is a thankless job, you have people who have crazy orders, like myself, that people have to get right. My niece loves working their because the quality, expectation and recognition that you get for people for working there. The name of Starbucks and their coffees are just like the name of McDonald and their hamburgers. They have maintained a reputation that is hard to beat. They are at the top of the market of the coffee game. Everyone who sees the clear cup with the green mermaid knows that they are getting great quality drinks. It is just common sense that if you want coffee you go to Starbucks.

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What do I think about fast food campaign demand for a $15-hour minimum wage and the right to unionize?

I have always thought that every one that works should be able to get paid a good, decent wage for that, The move of the "fight for $15," has really got me thinking do we actually benefit us to raise the minimum wage to $15-hr? I think that it doesn't. The more that you raise wages, the cost of living goes up. Everything will be more expensive. Gas, food, household items...etc. I remember a time where I paid $545-month for rent. that was in 2008 for a one bedroom apartment. 12 years later and a couple of minimum wage increase has brought that one bedroom to 1200-month. I recently asked my husband this very question about whether or not he agrees to bring the minimum wage to $15-hour? He said, " Heck No!" He says that the cost of living would sky rocket. its already hard to pay for things as it is right now. He says that minimum wage jobs are for kids that are in high school or fresh out of high school with not commitment, they are just going to school or just thinking about them and what they should do with their lives. He says that minimum wage jobs especially for fast food workers should not be for people that are trying to support a family. They are made for teenagers that are trying to make income for their high school essentials. Trying to pay for their clothing, prom, dates...etc. I agree with him in that aspect. I think that fast food jobs should be jobs that is for teens and young adults. It should not be a job for someone to invest in for long term and especially when raising a family. Raising minimum wages for jobs that is meant to young people get through school is not necessary. I don't think that unionizing fast food jobs is necessary either. It is not meant to be a long term, support your family type of job. It isn't, trust me, I have worked at Taco Bell Senior year and through college. I used it for income and not for something that I would depend on to build a future. I was not only a Crew member, but I also advanced myself into a manager role with the company. There were so much turn over with employees. Its not job that people take seriously or remain committed to, for long. I have worked in a fast food company and the main goal for myself was to work there, get a paycheck, pay for my schooling, get the experience to move onto a more career like position. Fast food work should be looked at as a stepping stone to the next position, and not a life long career commitment.

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"Sociologist Ray Oldenburg developed the concept of third place (1989) to describe spaces where people can get together to meet and talk, and contrasted then with the "first place" of a private home, and the "second place" of a workplace." (page 95)
Third place offers a place for people to hang out outside their private homes. Some examples of third place are barbershops, coffee shot and bars...etc.
There are mixed views of whether Starbucks is considered at third place. Some people may not go to Starbucks to talk to strangers and to meet new people. Bryant Simon's ethnographic experiences suggests that people go to Starbucks and uses it as a Second place. They go to meet people that they know, they uses Starbucks as a personal office with a clean bathroom. Students use Starbucks as a place to do homework and read their textbooks. I tend to agree with that. Although I have went to Starbucks and have seen random people starting conversations in line about the price of coffee and what is going on in the world, but when they get their drink of choice, the conversation ceases. For myself, I am that student that goes to Starbucks for the drinks and to read and study with little interruptions from my 2 children arguing. That last thing that I would like is to have a complete stranger start a conversation about politics or the weather. I love to be in public, to have time to myself to be alone. Simon's experience was to deliberately make conversations with strangers, but he found the process awkward and uncomfortable, as most of us would be, if we were in his position. "Simon's concluded that Starbucks "simulates" the ideal of a coffeehouse, but it doesn't produce genuinely open social interaction required of a Third place (page 97)." "To be a real third place, you participate by talking and listening; you don't just sit there, and it isn't just about you (page 97).

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(H)  376-382: Gans, The Uses of Poverty: The Poor Pay All.

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(H)  376-382: Gans, The Uses of Poverty: The Poor Pay All.

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"Sociologist have documented  that the poor confront social condition so damaging that their marriages are more likely to break up, they are sicker than others, their children are more likely to drop out of school and get in trouble with the lawn they are more likely to commit and to be victimized by violent crime. On average, they also die younger than most It is difficult to romanticize poverty when one knows what it's true conditions are (page 376)."

I have lived in conditions that have been mentioned in the above statement.  When your parents are poor, Immigrants from Cambodia, new to the United States, you don't get to live in an affluent community that you want to. Where we lived, the community was riddled by crime and violence. My parents sheltered us in our small apartment so we didn't have to see or deal with the negativity in the area we lived.
Everything that we had done as far as going grocery shopping or running errands would be all together and in the day time. I don't think that my parents ever left us at home by ourselves. When they left for work in the cherry fields, they would take all of us with them or they would take us to our grandparents house.
Even with out parents trying to shelter us from seeing what was going on, we knew the kind of place that we lived. There were pimps, drug dealers, prostitutes, car thieves...etc. Everyday, there would be a neighbors car missing or vandalized. My parents were done. We lived there for a year. My parents were able to be approved for a government program called Section 8 that helped low income families pay for a good amount of their rent. My parents ended up moving to the North Side of Stockton, CA. The neighborhood was better, the community was a lot more quiet.  It was night and day. We got to experience how it was to go out and interact with other children without fear or violence and crime.
Growing up poor, gives you a disadvantage on work and opportunities that it would if you were born into money. It also teaches you to be tough. I grew up in the "ghetto" which I would call it. It has made me appreciate that experience. It has taught me to be a stronger individual. Many of my friends that continued living their did eventually get into the crime and the degradation of their community, I know that it's hard. I also know that life is also about choices. My parents wanted better for their children. They chose to make sacrifices and get their children into a better neighborhood. They chose to stay strong as a married couple and compromise. Save what little money they had. They knew that living in that crime infested community that the odds of one or more of their children, doing drugs, dropping out of school, or being killed was high. They made a choice to take us out of that neighborhood and that changed our lives. I appreciate them for their wisdom and their sacrifices for the betterment of all of their kids.

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 (H)   383-394: Morris & Grimes, Moving Up from the Working Class.

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 (H)   383-394: Morris & Grimes, Moving Up from the Working Class.

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This Chapter was about socialization of Sociologists from working class backgrounds. Getting a look into their experiences and success of the things that they have accomplish. How being raised in a working class family and gaining success to middle class status left them feeling like they have been "caught in the middle."
I know that family all to well. My parents are from working class backgrounds. My father was a "Jack of all Trades" He has worked as a baker, a mechanic, a Iron worker, a construction worker, he's built homes...etc.
My mother is a housekeeper/Environmental Specialist at St Joseph's Hospital for over 25 years. I come from hard " Working Class" people.  Similar to these Sociologists, my parents stressed education as being the biggest thing that would advance me out of the working class into middle or high class status.
"Bourdieu (1984-1986) refers to family resources as the total volume of "capital" available for expropriation by a child. He argues that capital assumes three forms: economic, cultural, and social."
"Economic Capital: refers to material wealth or economic power."
When I was young, I never really understood why we went to the thrift stores to get our clothing or why I had to wear my older sisters clothing even though I was taller than her. She was a year older but I wanted my own clothing. My friends that had parents that had money would always ask me why I wore my sisters clothing and for the first time I was aware that it was not normal to do that.

"Cultural Capital: refers to a broad range of knowledge about the world within an individual lives."

My parents took education seriously. They never wanted to help me with my education as far as being a part of my learning. They felt that everything that I would need to learn would be shown to me while I was at school. They wanted me to succeed and I think that all parents want their children to graduate from school and to do better that what they did in life so that it can help them find a better job that them. For my parents getting good grades were everything. They wanted me to grasp the learning from what I was being taught so when I did start working I can be a better asset to my boss and the company that I work for.
"To many working-class parents, a "good" report card is equivalent to a satisfactory evaluation at work." (page 387)

"Social Capital: refers to the network of social connections (a social network) that can be mobilized by the family for it's use.
Social Capital is developed to build relationships and ties to help one another. In order to do this you have to be social and show good will.

Now that I have worked and put myself through school and make a decent paycheck for myself, and have gotten  myself a "career type"  job. I would  consider myself "middle class." I still feel as these sociologist do. They feels as though "It is much more difficult difficult, however, to "become" middle class -- to experience middle class existence that "feels right." (page 397). I feel as though people can always work hard and change their status or position from one class to another. It's that experience that they were taught prior to them attaining their goals that makes as though they are "caught in the middle." It's often easier to be content to live a life that you are use to than striving to change it and feel divided.

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(H)  395-406: Higley, The U.S. Upper Class

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(H)  395-406: Higley, The U.S. Upper Class

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How is it to be into a privilege? I wouldn't know the answer to that. When a person is born into an upper class family, their lives are basically set for them. They really don't have to worry about anything, nonetheless money. They don't have to decide what boarding school they go to, what Ivy league college to attend, what clubs to join while attending college, what religious group to be apart of and even how upper class parents announce their daughters at the Debutante Ball. In some cases friends are decided by families.  Their children are normally around one another. They go to the same private schools, play sports together and even attend social events and parties together. That is why the "Haves" increase their chances of marrying someone from the same pedigree and it also insures their will be a strong in business and finances. In doing so the also secure their connection and lineage of wealth.

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How has growing up in my social class effected my life?

I grew up in Lower Class family. I was born to two immigrant parents on welfare who were fieldworkers. I saw the struggles first hand.  There were times that the only food that we had would be the fisher caught by my dad that day. My parents also had a garden, they grew; cucumbers, lettuce, melons, peppers, onions, garlic...etc. In the backyard there was a whole lot of fruit trees also. We often got our vegetables and fruits from what they grew and harvested. With our clothes, my mom and grandmother, us to make out clothing. It they didn't make our clothes, we would get it from the thrift store. With only rare exception of when and if my father make a good pay from one of his many side jobs, we would buy new clothing from Walmart or other department stores. My parents would buy the clothing on the bigger side so we were able to wear it for a while and hand it down to the next child in line. Our dishes never matched. It was hard to find matching dishes at the thrift stores, but they did what they could. My parents didn't have a lot of money or material things but they were always there for all five of their children. They taught us how to work hard, obey authority, do good in school, so we can do better that what they did in life. They taught us love one another and were there to support us emotionally. As a mom of two kids now, I remember the struggling that I use to go through. I have promised myself to do better that what my parents did financially. I have always tried to give my children the very best of material things. I try to give my children the things that my parents never were able to buy us. I often have felt as though if I gave them those things; items, toys, electronics, phones, clothing...etc. It would mean that I loved them. The logic was to give them the latest toys and electronics items, not because they did well or the fact that they deserved it. It was just because I was able to. I have two spoiled kids. They expect to be given everything. Being from a poor lower class family still effects me until today. When my husband and I struggled financially, it would makes me physically sick. If brings me back to days when I was young. My husband works hard for our family in order to provide for us. For our family of four he makes well over the amount to be considered Middle Class. He is working so hard for me to pursue my dreams of being an Nurse. It took me five years to decide to leave a job where I was making over 55 thousand dollars a year to pursue my dreams. Being from the background that my came from, making that decision to have my husband be the only income was hard. It left me with a whole lot of trust issues. Financially we are partners. Now I have to be able to focus on my schooling. It left me with doubts on whether or not he will continue to carry the family financially by himself and for my family the still have what we need and want. Then I remembered that, I had to rely on God to be our ultimate provider for our family. I still may always live with insecurities on how I grew up, but it doesn't have to define who I really am or what I will end up being, a successful Registered Nurse!

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 "Wealth Inequality in the United States."             Provide your reaction to the video and explain it using what you have learned in this section of the course.            

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 "Wealth Inequality in the United States."             Provide your reaction to the video and explain it using what you have learned in this section of the course.            

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It's amazing how much the 1% of Wealthy American control so much of the National Income. "The Top 1% Controls 50% of the Stocks, Bonds and Mutual Funds. The Other 50% own only a 0.5%, they aren't able to invest, they are barely scraping by." I am not shocked from learning this information from the video, because we learned it in class and from our reading. The video tells about socialism where every Americans money are distribute evenly, but that won't work because, American's need working class Americans. The video also shows a average worker in a business would have to work over a month to make as a CEO of a company in  hour. Wow, that example really shows me how unequal the world really is. The rich is truly getting richer. The rich is truly getting richer, while everyone else around them are struggling. There are loop holes , tax breaks, and write offs that the rich get away with to help them get richer. The working class or Lower class are getting poorer. They are living off of minimum wage where the federal minimum wage is about 7.25/hour. Minimum wage has not kept up with inflation, Minimum wage has not gone up in over 13 years while food, gas and shelter has continued to rise in prices. People are finding themselves having to work more hours a week and still barely making ends meet. Now, people are having to work more than 50 hours a week to make it.
Working class are often still living around their family. It makes sense, they socialize more with their families because it is easier to live next to each other to borrow items, have social gatherings and help with child care. I don't think that there will ever be an answer to fixing the wealth inequality in America. The scales are leaning so much towards helping the rich and wealthy. Its a problems that has been going on for so long that just like every problem in the world, there are no one answer to fixing it.

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What is your favorite sport(s)? How many different social factors can you identify that have shaped your love of this sport? (e.g., educational institutions, natural sports culture, mass-media)

My favorite all time sports is Football. I am a " Die Hard" San Francisco 49ers fan. For my parents, it was extremely awkward for me to be a sports fan, all because I was their daughter. For them I was expected to stay in the house and learn how to cook and clean so I can make someone lucky man a good wife some day. Out of five of their children, I loved sports the most. Football would be my first sport that I love, followed by Basketball and then Baseball. I begged my parents to put me in sports, but they always told me that it was not lady like for me to go and play sports. My parents were very overprotective with their daughters, and they had three. We weren't allowed to go outside to socialize. They always told us that they had five kids and these brothers and sisters are all the friends that we needed. They were perfectly fine with my two younger brothers going out and make friends, but for the rest of us, we stayed in the house, cleaning or reading. So in the house we stayed. My older sister and I were the first two born. We stayed home almost the majority of the time. After the house was cleaned and the homework was completed, we were able to watch the television. What was always on at our house? Sports. My sister and I would sit and watch sports all day. At first we, despised it. We live in Stockton, and the only football teams that were playing on the channels that we had were the Oakland Raiders or the San Francisco 49ers. After a while of watching these team, I found myself rooting for the San Francisco 49ers. I love the color red. That was one of the reasons why I preferred to watch them. My sister chose to watched football, especially the 49ers was because they had a lot more cuter players. For me, any players a 49ers uniform was attractive. I remembered going to school and all I needed to see was that 49ers logo on another students school items and I would start talking to them and asking them if they had watched the game. I found myself doing that in almost every school that I went to. It was a conversation starter and also something that we had in common to talk about. Now I am a member of San Francisco Fan Page where we come together and discuss nothing but the 49ers and the games. We have a community of thousands of fans. We support each others obsession with our team. After a game, if we win, I will watch the highlights over ten times until we play next week. Ever since I was about 8 years old, to present day, at 40 years old, my love for "my team" has not wavered. My favorite saying from our group is, "Win, lose or tie, I love my 49ers, until the day I die."

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Sports/Race

Discussion: High-school heroes?

What sports were emphasized when you were in high school? Were sports optional or mandatory? Were there social boundaries between athletes and people who were not in sports?

When I was in high school, wow, can't believe that it has been two decades since I graduated! Playing sports was definitely optional. People signed up for it and they had try outs. You had to be athletically built. For my school, Bear Creek High School, It was football.  If you were a Jock, you scored a lot of points with people, but if you were a football player, you were the most respected and loved individuals on campus by students, teachers and coaches.  They were given "breaks" in things that they did that were wrong. Such as going off campus when we weren't able too. If they were caught doing fighting, they would only receive a warning. Teachers would be laxed in grading their assignments. I saw it all. I remembered it was my Freshman year. I saw a senior football player that was the star football player. He was signing school pictures for people. He thought he was going to make it to the NFL. I have never seen him play football. What I did know was that we did not even have a winning record. I went up to him and asked him for a signed picture also. I didn't know the guy but if he was going to the NFL like people were saying, I wanted a signed picture. He turned around and looked at me with such disgust. I them proceeded to ask him for a signed picture and he said, " These pictures are for my team members and friends, and that he would not sign one for me. I said to him, " I didn't want one anyways because the football team sucks anyways!" Then I walked away. People who were on any of the sports teams in my high school were always treated with the upmost respect. If you weren't in sports, you were treated like you didn't matter.

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(JCB)  Chapter 12: Music/Racism and Cultural Appropriation 10/27/2020

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(JCB)  Chapter 12: Music/Racism and Cultural Appropriation 10/27/2020

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How do you feel about music companies collecting and using information about your personal listening habits in order to a) target marketing efforts towards you, and b) build databases for understanding consumer preferences?

I honestly don't care about companies gathering my information on the music that I listen to. I prefer to have the "type" of music and artist be recommended to me. I also listen to Pandora's stand up comedian channel. I know that a variety of comedians names pop up to the type of comedy that I like. I know that companies are always collecting data on what we watch, what is popular, how many millions of people tune into a show. There is really no way to stop it.
I don't mind at all. I feel like its a service that is catering to my likes and dislikes and it makes recommendations based on that. My husband on the other hand does not like any kind of information gathered on him. He is especially against the Census, that is mandatory by law. There is something with the word mandatory that just does not work with him. I am not worried about companies collecting and using my information to target marketing efforts towards me. If it some service or item that I don't need, I am have the capability in saying no. The positive in collecting my information is getting me a play list of music and artists that I like.

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Melting Pot? What is that term used to describe? My interpretation of melting pot is a bunch of different races and ethnic groups being put into on big pot, figuratively, and being as one. That we would see everyone as equals. That is not the case at all. I learned when I was young that I was not an equal. I was a child born to Asian farm working immigrants. I was treated like an outsider by my peers, classmates and even my teachers when I was at school.
I use to believe and look at people like we were equals. My parents didn't really hate any race or ethnic groups, so I was not aware of such hate. I use to go to school and the majority of white kids would ask me if It was true, "Do you eat dogs?" That was what their parents told them. It wasn't off of seeing anything, but of what stories they have heard about South East Asians. I would look at them with such a surprise, I have never eaten anything but chicken, beef and fish. I was unaware of anyone in my family ever eating a dog. Some days I would go to school and hear, "Ching Chong" she eats dogs." Some kids would laugh and others would be quiet. They didn't approve of what the other kids were saying or how they were treating me, but didn't want to voice their approval because of fear of being rejected from the group.  I didn't understand why these children were being so mean to me. There were times that my teacher would hear the rude comments but never say anything to them. I assume because of the fact that they were white and she was white and that was why she ignored the bullying. From when I was young, I started seeing how not equal we really were. Fast forward some decades, and thing have gotten a little better for me. I met and married the love of my life. He is a black man. being in a relationship with him, I start to see a lot of mistreatment and social problems with that. Being in an interracial relations was hard. Both of our parents had to adjust to not only a new person in the family, but someone that didn't understand what it meant to be in the other persons race category. Being in my husband family, I have heard horrible stories of how they were mistreated living in the south in the 50's and 60's. Some of the stories brought me back to my childhood. The memories of being mistreated just for being different. In reading this Chapter, It made me think of a time when I was out with my mother in law, we were going to a restaurant. I went in first, the followed after me, she saw two white woman walking out and she opened the door for them. They looked at her and said absolutely nothing, as if it was her job. She yelled out to the two white woman whom she just opened the door for and yelled, "You're welcome!" She had followed them a little and they turned and looked at her and once again, said absolutely nothing. My mother in law is a woman that had no problem speaking her mind. She looked at the woman and said, "you are going to make me act my color today!" I looked at her and when I pulled her back into the restaurant, asked her, "What do you mean by that comment of  act your color?" She looked at me and said when a black person was acting ignorant or crazy, they associated it with their skin color, the white people use to think that we were loud, ignorant and was wild like monkeys and they associated that with our skin color. So when I use that sentence, I am basically saying to them if you want to see this so called loud, ignorant and wild animal, I'll show them how bad I can be. I learned two things that day from my mother in law. One, she is a woman that stands up for what she believes and I can respect that. Two, no matter how different our upbringing was, we tell the same stories of being mistreated for being who we were. No matter how many times I hear about being a melting pot society, I can't and won't believe it until we really are equals.

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This chapter is about a Jewish man that studies racism and interviews racist people. He shares his experience about being driving up towards the mountains in North Carolina. He was there to interview the white klans men who were minus there leader whom had been arrested. He was there for  a rally. When interviewing the men, they find out that he is a Jewish man and become really hostile and mean towards him, basically putting him in the same category as a black man. He felt out of place, he felt like he was defined as the "Jew" and he felt incredibly lonely. He continued to walk by himself, he was definitely isolated from the other Racist White men.
He recalls his interview that he did when he was in Detroit with these two young white men. He noted that he drove pass closed plants and manufacturing plants. He gives us a look into why plants being closed and work being few that young men would find themselves interested in joining a cause. The two Nazi youths were fatherless, there were high school drop out and they had no real education to fill these jobs that are being filled by more educated individuals. They ended up being a part of the Nazi movement to give them a sense of belonging and allowing them to be busy from seeing the real issues in their lives. He uses examples of its the same as a youth joining a gang. They are normally in the same situation. He brings up being a teacher and  hearing his students talk about being "color blind; they don't see black and white." (page 375) He feels that his students don't truly understand. He also states that we have all have a little racist in us. "We cannot live day to day without absorbing a certain amount of white racism into our thoughts. (We similarly absorb homophobia and sexism.)" He is right, we absorb the environment that we are in. I was raised to be around mainly Asian people. I have seen all the woman in my family do this, there is a black or Mexican people that walks by us and they clutch their purses. There have always done that since I was young. My mom talks about her friends being robbed by a black man. I remember that she spoke to my aunt and my aunt said, "All black people cannot be trusted." I grow up and subconsciously clutch my purse when a black man approaches me and my husband pointed out why did I do that? Mind you, my husband is black. I told him that I don't know. How I have seen my mom and aunts do that, has been embedded in me. I have been exposed to woman fearing of strange Black and Mexican men  walking up to them and having that be the first reaction. I don't think that I can ever say that I am color blind or treat other groups of people differently. I am Asian, and I treat other Asian groups differently. We are not perfect as human beings, but we need to strive to do better then what we do. We all have been exposed to some kind of hate, racism and discrimination. " It doesn't matter whether or not you or I called can call ourselves good folks. Our actions are what matters." So lets do our best to treat others the way that we would like to be treated.

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Required entry:  Ask yourself the following questions and then ask at least five other people (not in this class) the same questions.  Record the answers. There are additional following questions:  What is race?  What does it mean to say that race is socially constructed?    

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Required entry:  Ask yourself the following questions and then ask at least five other people (not in this class) the same questions.  Record the answers. There are additional following questions:  What is race?  What does it mean to say that race is socially constructed?    

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"Socially construction refers to the fact that many of the categories we use to make sense of the world are socially created, rather than naturally occurring or biologically inevitable. In part, this is because humans don't experience the world directly through our senses; as complex intelligent, social creatures, we create conceptual models or categories to make sense of the world around us."

I recently interviewed five of my  friends 5 of the same questions regarding race. Here are the questions and answers below.

1. What race are you?

I had three (including myself) that said that they were Asian. One stated she was Filipino and Italian. One stated that she was Mexican and White. Another lady states that she was Black

2. How do you know? How do you make that decision?

All interviewees answered that they know from their families.

3. How did you learn what race you are? Can you tell me about some of the early messages  you first received about race in general or your race in particular?

With the interviewees the answer was also family and family functions; such at parties, weddings, and funerals. They learn what their race and culture is all about. Family is forever. All that they had was they race and cultures. They were shaped by their family.

4. How do you decide what race other people are? Examples?

My interviewees knew what race people were by being around other races and cultures growing up. They knew by their celebrations. Their belief, morals and values. They knew because they were often the same race of people that were around one another.

5. How do other people decide what race you are? Examples?

A lot of my interviewees stated that people didn't really know what their races were because they were of mixed races. Most of my friends/interviewees were mixed with four or more races or ethnic groups.

When I was first ask what Race was, I always thought it was my ethnic group my belonged to. I use to always respond by saying that I'm Thai, Laos, Cambodian and Chinese, but that would be more of what Ethnic group do I fall in.
I never really thought of it in detail. The definition of "Race refers to physical difference that groups and cultures consider socially significant. Race does not have anything to do with biology. There are no genes that are common in all Blacks, Whites or Asians...etc.

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(JCB)  Chapter 7: Toys/Gender, Sex and Sexuality.

How much choice do children have in the toys available to them? What are the key factors shaping children's desire for toys? How might children resist or reinterpret the dominant messages of consumer culture in their play?

Children today have many toys available to them. They are grouped into the baby toys, boys toy aisle and girls toy aisle. I took my eight year old daughter to the toy sections recently and she the aisle for the girls toys were bombarded by pink and purple. It definitely got my attention. I was mesmerized by how neatly the toy section was. My daughter is very much a "girly girl," which basically means that she loves playing with make up. She plays dress up with her girl cousins. They love to take care of their stuffed animals. She is into fashion and hair. She is basically the opposite of her mother. She did very well in her last report card and I told her that I was going to take her to buy another Barbie as a reward. She saw this toy commercial which was a short one but, extremely effective. She was sold, she had to go to Wal-Mart to look for this Barbie doll.  It wasn't that she needed anymore toys with the mountain that was piled up in her room but a promise is a promise. We walked down the aisle together and I was in shock at how many more Barbie's there were to choose from. She ended up picking one and I paid for it. She has always been shown from other little girls in our family that they are girls, they are suppose to play house, cooking and cleaning. I tried to buy her a Barbie car and she was not happy. She stated that "boys played with cars!" Even if it was a hot pink car. She categorized everything pink and bright as girl toys and the Cars, trucks and video games to be for her older brother. This view also came from seeing the younger boys with their cars and video games. Family, the stores and the Commercials are big factors in shaping kids desire for toys. It doesn't only matter with toys but also with clothes and behaviors. When we are born our parents are going to have either a pink outfit or a blue outfit waiting for us to wear home. Now a days there are parents that chooses not to go with the traditional pink or blue but rather the black, white, yellow or greens. Family also teaches that stepping out of the social norms with need correction. I remembered when I was a young lady that my grandmother would pop me on my hand if I was to go over to the boys side and play with their cars and trucks. They would always step in and take the car our of my hands and give me a doll to play with. I hated that. I rebelled, I did not want to wear pink, I did not want to fix my hair and put bows on it and I didn't like playing with dolls. it was the same with my brothers, if my father was to see them playing with my dolls, he would spank them. He said that he didn't want any of his sons to become gay by playing with dolls.  With my parents, if I didn't play with the toys that were bought for you according to you sex, then we wouldn't play with any toys at all.

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What is your first toy you remember having? Using the insights you gained from this chapter, can you identify whether this toy taught you about your gender? What examples of gender policing can you remember from your early experiences with toys?

The first toy that I remember having was a Barbie. I hated it. My parents gave the girls Barbie dolls and the brother trucks and toy guns. They stated that girls were more feminine and should play with toys that will teach them how to be a proper lady and a mom when we get older. I learned very quickly that my parents were grooming their daughters to be moms in the future. I learned that my parents expected and trained us to cook, clean and take care of our siblings. We were suppose to do it all. Every toy that I remembered having through out my child hood was a "girlie" toy, dolls, kitchen sets, hair and make up sets...etc. I think that that was the reason why I fought so hard against conforming to what my parents wanted. I wanted to be a girl that loves playing with toy guns, trucks and video games. Every time my mom gave me a stuffed animal or dolls, I would trade with my brother for his toy cars and go and play by myself. My parents control everything involving our gender. They wanted us to act according to how we were born. They kept everything in order. If we stepped out of want was socially acceptable, they would be upset with us. I have literally dealt with and will continue to deal with that my whole life.

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Required entry: JCB p. 207 Toy Store Observation

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Required entry: JCB p. 207 Toy Store Observation

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On your own or in a group, visit a local toy store and take note of the ways that toys are gendered. How are the toys organized? How can you tell a toy is targeted toward boys and girls? Are any toys gender-neutral?

I went to Wal-Mart to observe the toy section to see how the toys were arranged. Well that was not the only reason why I was in the toy aisle that day, I took my two kids over to Walmart to see what they wanted for Christmas this year. I was basically killing two birds with one stone. My children and I was walking through the toy aisle and it was so colorful. It has been a long time since I have taken my kids to Wal-Mart, nonetheless the toys section. My Children are always with me at the Dollar Tree Store or the .99 cent Store. I don't believe in spending a lot of money on toys that they will most likely break within an hour. The only time that they will get toys that are over
twenty dollars is for their birthdays or for Christmas. Now that is a little back ground on what I do with my children. When we were in Wal-Mart, my children and I were walking through the toy section and you can see that there is a clear division in the aisle between the "boy" section and the "girl" section.  I went down the "boys" aisle with my son, there were so much blue and green the that aisle. They had hot wheels, Lego's, cars and trucks, Action figures and array different colors, shapes and sizes of Nerf guns. My son was so amazed at how much toys they had for him. Since he was a 13 years old, I allowed him to be in the boys aisle by himself and took my 8 year old daughter to the blindly pink girl aisle. As we were walking hand in hand down the girl aisle, we saw dolls such as Barbie's and Baby Alive, kitchen sets, LOL Dolls, make up sets, Doctor kits...etc. My daughter was in heaven. She loves pink, she loves make up things and also, she is very nurturing with animals and babies. Wal-Mart knows what they are doing with the way that their toy section was set up. After my daughter chose a stuffed animal, we walked down the baby section for the section for the two year old and under. I found that although they did have a lot of toys for boys and girls, this section was more so gender neutral. They had stackable rings, sensory toys, teething toys, blocks... just a lot of colorful toys that would appeal to a little kid. It was not obvious that it was for little boys or girls. I have walked down this toy section for a long time with nieces and nephews birthdays, but I never really looked at how the aisles were set up or maybe I didn't really care. I go there and see a blue section and automatically that it is the boys section, same with the girls, I see a overwhelming amount of pink and know that its the girls section. The colors that we attached to sex and gender is socially constructed, just like race and ethnicity.

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(H)  161-172: Henslin, On Becoming Male: Reflections of a Sociologist on Childhood and Early Socialization.

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(H)  161-172: Henslin, On Becoming Male: Reflections of a Sociologist on Childhood and Early Socialization.

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In this Chapter, Henslin states that our sexuality is a part of our social inheritance. He also states that masculinity and femininity is not based on our genetics but it is taught, we learn through socialization. He talks about how cautious his own parents were not to make a mistake that the colors that he wore. At those moments where people would say that he was the opposite of what his sex of what he was it would agitate his parents.
"It would force them to rethink their activities in proper sex typing. His parents felt like it was their obligation to make certain that their offspring is receiving the right start in life." (page 163)
His parents were concerned with behaviors, clothing and toys also. They wanted to make sure that he was playing with masculine toys. It had to be gender appropriate. He was given trucks, tanks and guns.  His parents really reminded me of my parents. When we would wear clothing that were not the feminine colors of the pink, purples, or rainbow colors. People would mistaken us for little boys. Back then it was just my sister and myself. My mom would keep our hair short, easier to manage and a lot of times when we were younger, they would always think that we were little cute boys. My parents would be so mad. When they took us shopping with them, we would always have on pink or purple dresses and people would still ask them why they had their little boys in dresses? I thought that was incredibly insulting. Just like toys were gender appropriate for James Henslin's parents. It was very important to my parents as well. We played with dolls, cooking set and make up. We were supposed to play dressed up. We played with toys that made us nurturing. It was to instilled in us to be good daughters, mothers and wives in the future. We were not expected to be rough, we were suppose to be dainty and "proper." The Boys were raised to be the strong and competitive with each other. Every game that they played they always kept score. There was always a clear winner or loser. For the girls we loved playing jump rope, grocery store, cooking, and games that didn't keep score, generally we took turn playing and helping each other with the other person needed help with the game. We didn't mind winning or losing didn't matter as much to us. I guess that is why we differ so much from on another. Boys and girls will always be raised with different expectations. I don't think that it is changing any time soon.

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  (JCB)   Chapter 11: Beauty/Ideology and Intersectionality and the beauty industry.

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  (JCB)   Chapter 11: Beauty/Ideology and Intersectionality and the beauty industry.

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"Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder," according to Margaret Wolfe Hungerford. Beauty is subjective. We all have our opinions on what is beautiful. It means that different people have different things that make them beautiful. It is what people are attracted to. Some people have the physical attributes, (in shape, beautiful body, face, hair,...etc) others see a persons confidence as being beautiful, many people have big hearts and have a beautiful personality and to many, that is beautiful. In Society, we based a great deal on peoples outer appearance. Woman, are suppose to be sexy, provocative, confident, oozing sexuality. Men, are suppose to be rugged, groomed, nicely dressed. Looks are a big part of seeing someone as being beautiful or not. We live in a world were there are unrealistic expectations on how a persons body should really look. We have our celebrity that are deemed the most beautiful people of the world. There are stars like; Beyonce, Kim Kardashian, Halle Berry, Blake Lively, Emma Watson...etc. They are just some of our beautiful celebrities voted for 2020.  I have a different outlook on what I think is beautiful in a person. I love getting to know someone. They don't have to have the best physical traits, but I love getting to know a persons heart. For myself, if your outer shell looks good and your personality or heart is not for good or genuine, It is a big turn off for me. The older I get, the more that I see that getting to know a person or judging a person only by the way they look has literally gotten me no where. Society wants that perfect image. When younger girls sees these stars in the movies and in person and they "appear" so perfect. They hair and make up is done, their clothing are expensive, name brands, they eat at the finest places, drive the fanciest cars, it's a lot to live up to. These woman, have a team of people that keeps them looking like that.  They have make up artist, hair stylist, personal stylist, team of cosmetic doctor to give them the body that they desire, if they weren't born with a big breast or butt, they also have a lot of money to be able to pay for these things.  But many young kids don't see that, so they strive to give themselves these unrealistic bodies.  One of the big things that I can think of is pregnancy, when a star/celebrity is pregnant she looks radiant, hair and make up are done, there are no stretchmarks, she barely gains any weight. Then when she has the baby, she is expected to get back to the size that she was over night, That is extremely hard to go and not all our bodies are the same. I remember thinking to myself that it was going to be that easy. I didn't have stretch marks before becoming pregnant, but when I did, it was a different story. I gains 45 pounds with my first pregnancy, I was diagnosed with Pregnancy Induced Hypertension and Gestational Diabetes, I had no energy, I had to be on bedrest, I had stretch marks everywhere. I felt so ugly, but when anyone asked my husband how I looked when I was pregnant, he would say that I was the most beautiful that he has ever seen me. At the end of the day, we can always strive to be like the stars that we see, or we can just learned to love ourselves for who we are, beautiful in our own unique way.

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(H)      173-179: Eder, On Becoming Female; Lessons Learned in School.

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(H)      173-179: Eder, On Becoming Female; Lessons Learned in School.

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In this reading, Eder, listened and watched young girls in a middle school interact with one another. She stated that "Preoccupation (with appearance) among American woman prevents them from focusing on more constructive aspect of themselves, such as who they are or what they are capable of accomplishing." (page 173)
I agree, we learn very early as young ladies that our looks are very important. Appearance matters so much and should be one of our main priority. She talks about cheerleaders during try outs are chosen on; "smiling, personality, bubbliness, appearance and attractiveness." (page 174) They learn real young that how people sees them is so important. I hate that schools do that, I do like that appearance is so important that for those young ladies that were chosen to be part of the cheerleading squad are made to feel ugly or overlooked. I think that for the young girls who are a little overweight or too skinny to have self image issues. There would always be the popular people that will make fun of those who weren't, they will always be groups of people that are the "nerd", the "jocks", the "cheerleaders", the "emo/goths", the "druggies/stoners...etc." These groups will never see eye to eye. I remember, when I was in middle school, the mean kids use to make fun of my weight. I didn't think that I was fat, but I wasn't skinny either. I thought that I was "normal", not by these kids standards. They make fun of my clothing, shoes and my weight, they said that I came from a poor family that couldn't afford the name brand clothing that they had. I was always made to feel inferior to them, and that was the things they said, I internalized it. By the time I went into High School, I had a full blown eating disorder. I had gotten really skinny. I tried it all, I rarely ate, sometimes when I ate too much, I would throw up. I took laxatives, I would exercise for so many hours each day that I would be consumed by seeing no fat on my body. I hit rock bottom, I took a good look at myself and saw that I was not happy. I saw a shell of my former self. I remember not eating for two days straight and getting so dizzy I fell and hit my head and bled with a little gash on the top on my head. I picked myself up and had to have a heart to heart with myself. Who was I doing this for? Why was I doing it? What did I hope to gain by being skinny for people who didn't accept or love me regardless. I worked my way back to building myself up. I started eating healthier, praying more, and I was finally doing it for someone that mattered, ME!

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  (H)      180-191: Thorne & Luria, Sexuality and Gender Children's Daily Worlds.

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  (H)      180-191: Thorne & Luria, Sexuality and Gender Children's Daily Worlds.

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Gender separation starts at an early age. Girls are usual sitting close to or around other little girls and the boys are normally surrounded by other little boys. Boys are more likely to play in games with rules and structure. They are normally the more athletic or the two sexes. They like playing and being more competitive where where are clear winners and losers in the game. They are at a young age and even into adulthood are playing sports. The separation among boys and girls. Boys tend to be a part of larger groups of other boys. They get in trouble as a group. Boys are more likely in their groups to use "dirty words" and flaunting it."Rule transgression in public is more exciting to boys in their group. Boys' groups are attentive to potential consequences of transgression, but compared with girls, groups of boys appear to be greater risk takes. Adults tending and teach children do not often undertake discipline of an entire boys' group; the adults might lose out and they cannot risk that." (page.182) Where as young girls on the other hand are more likely to be activity where there are no clear winners. They generally like to play hopscotch, jungle gym and jump rope. Girls are more supportive to their friends, mainly trying to build them up. When they have friends they will have a small intimate group of friends. They are the ones that mainly have a girl friend that is called her "best friend." " The smaller and more personal groups provide less protective anonymity than a large group of boys." (page. 186) I agree with this reading, as a girl I was also in a small intimate group. We did have that group of boys that always was into mischief. They would create chaos wherever they went. I believe it was Junior High, when I felt like the group of boys were the most disrespectful. They would pick on the weaker boys. The "sissy", the "nerd", the "gay one." Just people that weren't like them. I know that most of it's from being taught that boy are suppose to be strong, angry and that crying and weakness, was not ok. Girls are okay to cry, be caregiver and be soft and gentle.  Those traits definitely effects us from childhood to adulthood.

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  (H)      192-198: Tannen, But What Do You Mean? Women and Men in Conversation.

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  (H)      192-198: Tannen, But What Do You Mean? Women and Men in Conversation.

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I honestly don't think that men and women would ever speak the same language. After reading this chapter, it makes it more clear about what I suspected. I see so many things in this chapter that I do, knowingly and unknowingly that I do them. The reading is covered by categories. Apologies, we as women apologize too much. I have been been told that I do that a lot. I never use to apologize for anything. I never thought that I was wrong about anything. That type of thinking is not a right way to think either. Now that I am much older and wiser, I know that I am wrong for the things that I do that hurt people. I have gotten so use to apologizing now that I apologize for everything. Unnecessary things. I was pushing my cart through the store and a woman was blocking my way, I said "Excuse me," multiple times. She looked at me and moved to the side to let me through. I said "thank you and I'm sorry!" Why did I tell her sorry when she not only was blocking my way but took forever to move out of my way. It has been embedded into my mannerisms, I have tried my best to stop apologizing to no reason.
Criticism / Praise : I'm a gluten for punishment in this area also. As a women, I have a lot of insecurities. I am always seeking approval from my family. Being born into an Asian family when you can be disowned at a drop of a dime, have taught me that others happiness is for the most part above my own. Girls are constantly critique and criticized as a grooming process for when we become wives and mothers. So I have learned to seek approval for almost everything that I do. I have to constantly be the best at what I do to have my parents approval and love. It comes as no surprise that I brought that way of thinking into my marriage. I'm always, "how did it taste? Is the house clean enough? Did you like the what I bought your kids?...etc." I'm always giving my husband compliments on working hard for our family and he does, I just want to hear the same from him and 90% of the time he will say it after I ask him. The other 10% is full "What I could have done better." I have understood that when you ask a man for his thoughts, he will tell you. As a women I have to learn to accept that If I didn't want to know his opinion, I shouldn't have asked.
Thank You's: As a women I just want for my husband to thank me every little thing that I do for him and our children, is that too much to ask? Once again, I'm guilty, just like apologizing for things for no reason, I also say thank you for no reason either. I use to lead meetings at my job as a Certified Medical Assistant and I would thank staff for showing up to a mandatory meeting. Something that they didn't have a choice whether or not to show up. I feel as though mandatory or not, I always have to show people appreciation for the simple things.
Fighting: Men and Women also are very much different in this area. My husband is a fighter.
He would rather physically fight someone (not me) then get into an argument with a women (me).  As women, we are able to build up our husbands with our words or tear them down. We know just what to say just to push their buttons, to get them heated in a short period of time. Men can do that also, but I feel as a women the length and subject that we bring up is unlimited in what we will say to our partner. The longest argument that I have had with my husband was a whole day of just verbally attacking him. He ended up leaving the house to avoid hearing my mouth. I honestly would have did the same thing.
Complaints: When I complain I just want to be heard by my husband, but he looks at is as an opportunity to help me solve it, find a resolution. As a women, I just want some love and sympathy. For men, They hear our complaints and take it as an opportunity to solve "The problem." For myself, just to have him there to listen to my problems is good enough.
Jokes: I hear from people all the time that I am a serious person. When I was working, I use to hear that from patients all the time. I was the CMA for two Chiefs of OBGYN for Lodi and Stockton. It took a long time to be trusted to be in that position. Even before that, I was always a serious person concerning work. My husband and his friends can laugh, joke and poke fun of one another all day and that would be ok. As soon as they say something to me, I take it as a personal attack. Over the years I have learned to let my guard down and lighten up a bit, I have learned the sarcastic way of joking that my husband and his friends do and have thrown a couple of jabs in myself and it has definitely improved our relationship. "There is no "right" way to talk. When problems arise, the culprit may be style difference- and all styles will at times fail with others who don't share or understand them, just like English won't do you much good if you try to speak to someone who knows only French." (page. 198) We need to make sure that what is said is truly being understood.

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 (H)      341-348: Katz, The importance of Being Beautiful

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 (H)      341-348: Katz, The importance of Being Beautiful

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I was always told that beauty was in the eye of the beholder? I always wonder what that meant. So, I looked it up. I was given one  example; " beauty cannot be judges objectively, for what one person find beautiful or admirable may not appeal to another."  That may be true. My husband thinks that I am gorgeous, he tells me that I am beautiful, EVERYDAY! I also know that I have been told my guy friends that I am just average looking. They gave me an average of 6 or 7 out of 10. For me, I think that is pretty good. For the people that are the 10's the absolute beauties, they do get treated better than the average looking person. It varies from culture to culture also on what is considerate beautiful. Being that I was born into an Asian family, their idea of beautiful was under 120 pounds and very fair complexion. The lighter our skin color was the more "valuable" we were to our future husbands. The darker we were the more undesirable we were to future mates. In my family, my parents had five children, four children had tan or dark complexion and I was the only child that was light skin, so light that my parents called me "white girl." I was treated differently then my siblings. My parents treated me I was a little gold mine. I was the "pretty" one, I was predicted to be the most successful and the only one of my siblings that would ever be married. It was all based on the color of my skin. I always thought my siblings were beautiful and handsome. For the Asian community, it was only based on skin color. If people think that black people being judged and treated unfairly by white people. Light skinned Asian vs Dark Skinned Asian is real thing. It is hard on both sides. I hated being treated more favorable then my siblings, for no other reasons then having lighter complexion. If a person is beautiful they can essentially get away with anything. I have seen it personally growing up. I have seen it in schools and also in work.  I have seen a young lady  out of come into one of my jobs that I use to have and get hired, on the spot, with no experience, because she was beautiful. She also went up against a lot of more qualified individuals with more experience. She got the job. She was hired as a Cashier/Receptionist. She was not good. I worked and trained her for 3 months, she still didn't know what to do. The men that worked around her picked up the slack for things that she was not getting. Men went to the store and got her food, coffee, basically catered to her. She even got to the point where she didn't want to answer the phones.  I was hard to work with her. I have been at many different types of employment.
I have worked with many different supervisors and I can honestly say that 9 out of 10 times, if there are a lot of candidates that are up for 1 position, they will hire the most attractive man or woman for the job. Experience rarely mattered in those interviews, I know because I am usually there next to the Supervisors asking the candidates questions of my own.  When I hear people saying that looks don't matter, I know that it is not the truth. People can be attracted to so many things; sense of humor, personality, voice, talents, but for people to say that looks don't matter, is just fooling themselves, looks may not be the biggest factor for someone being attractive but, its still a factor. It matters more than people think.

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(H)      518-534: Miller, Women in the Military

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(H)      518-534: Miller, Women in the Military

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Whether it is woman getting into a big company and working her way up or being in the military, the respect level for her would never be at the level of a man. I'm not surprised by this reading. Women have always had to work harder to be equal to men. We are expected to be at home and be the nurturers, the cooks, the cleaners, the one that takes care of the children. People need to really take a good look at these times. Its definitely changing. Women work now and still if they have a family is expected to come home and clock into job number two. There are a majority of men in the military that does not want a women there. They prefer them to be on the base as nurses or cooks. The more traditional women role. Women that are in the Army are harassed by men. Sexually, Gender harassment, Gossip, Sabotage, threats...etc.  "Gender harassment refers to harassment that is not sexual, and it used to enforce traditional gender roles, or in response to the violation of those roles. This form if harassment also aim to undermine women's attempts at gaining power or to describe that power as illegitimately obtained or exercised." (page 520)
Women in the Army feel that gender harassment is more disruptive to their lives then sexually harassment. Woman that are in power when trying to give soldiers of lower ranks directions and orders are not listened as if they don't understand the direction of instructions or moving slowly, dragging their feet. It is not necessarily something that they can be reprimanded for because they are essentially still following orders, just slow with it. Men challenge women's authority and show them little respect then they would it it was a man that was in charge. It makes life difficult for women superiors in the Army, It leads women to being more hostile and having them remind the officers who they are.
Men in the military are often looking for the women to "mess up" they are always being looked at in detail in every order that they give. It is leading women to be exhausted and always being scrutinized everyday. They even give an example of women having to keep it together because they are setting the example for other women that are enlisting. They feel as though they can't show any weakness. Even Solders that committed suicide, because they were men, no big deal was made of the incident. They were "just men."
(page. 522) If that had been women that had committed suicide, " People would have asked whether women could handle the stress of deployment or separation from their families." (page 522)  Women deal with so much more harassment then men. They have to deal with rumors that are said about them. Rumors are the best way to destroy a women credibility. " Repeatedly I have heard that if a woman dates more than one man in the Army, she is labeled "a slut." If she doesn't date, she is labeled a "dyke."  (page. 522) You literally can not win. If a women works hard and rise in the ranks quickly, the men would have this perception that she has slept her way to the top.
Men are constantly trying to discredit the women, like it is their jobs to do so. Women in the Army also deals with Sabotage, of equipment and tools. Women mechanics would arrive at work to find heavy tracks taken off of  the vehicles that they were assigned. They would continue to fix it everyday until they earned their male counterparts respect. They would have not done that to them if they were men.
It goes to show me that no matter how women have advanced in society and being career women, doctors, lawyers, nurses, politicians...etc, that they are still being paid less for the same work that their male peers and co workers are being paid. They are still harassed and looked at as a sexual object, whether it be at work or in the military. Women only want to be be treated with the same respect with the same pay scale. We are multi-taskers, we can work, take care of home and family. Its sad that we feel like we have advanced as women only to be held back by sexist men in power. It's time that they know our worth!

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Required entry: JCB p. 330 Counting Beauty

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Required entry: JCB p. 330 Counting Beauty

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A Trip to the drugstore:

I went to CVS Drugstore in Stockton recently. As soon as I walked in the store was bombarded with Christmas items/decorations. To my right there was a sanitizing station, right as I continued down the walkway, there was the make up aisle. I see nothing but makeup, hair products and body wash. Mainly things for women to focus their attention, I know this, because that was exactly what I did. In the aisle on the right side there was women's perfume and men cologne. The aisles were a little cramped. I seen that the products were eye level to get an attention of a woman that is 5ft 6in or shorter. As I continued passed the self care items for women, I passed up the tooth paste, baby care aisle and cards section. All things that would appeal to a women. We mainly buys these items for the family. Everything that were being sold were somethings that a 5ft 4in woman can reach, I know, because that is my height. just looking on the right hand of the store, I was able to get make up, perfume, tooth paste, baby wipes and a birthday card for my sister. That really made it easy for my shopping trip. The make up alone had one of the biggest sections. It went the length of the wall of the store. We knew who the store was more focused on when it was constructed. Women. I walked around the store to see what the left side of the store had and it started with a coupon station, food and candy section that were lower then eye level and I think that was to appeal to children that will beg their parents to buy the candy for them. Going further along there are cleaning supplies, paper goods, over the counter medication, medical supplies as in alcohol, band aids, blood pressure cuffs, diabetic supplies. Along side that wall was incontinence supplies. adult pads, diapers and wipes. The left side could have also directed to the nurturers of the home. I go to CVS because my of children still being bedwetters at the age of 13 and 8 due to their medical conditions. I am always there picking up medication and adult night diapers also, I am there a lot, I rarely ever see men buying there items. If they are there, they are in there for quick items, mainly things for themselves. I feels as though the stores cater to a women based, we are the shoppers and the ones that take care of home, even if we work. They make the layout easy to read with the signs hanging above. The women sections are lighter in color, we have the pinks and the purples that draws the eyes to that section, we have been socialized to look for those colors. The toys and the candy aisles are put at eye level of young children and some adults also. It appeals to them and they have to have it. It is the same thing with being at the register, all the candy and at hip level of a normal adult. I had to back up to look at all the selection of goodies. The store knows how to appeal to their consumers. They set up their stores the same way and it works.

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(JCB) Chapter 8: White Wedding/Marriage and the Family

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(JCB) Chapter 8: White Wedding/Marriage and the Family

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Beyond white wedding:

I have not attended many weddings in my life, maybe five in the forty years of life. One of the memorable weddings that I went to was a wedding on my friend from school that was on her third marriage. What made it a memorable wedding was the guests and their reaction to the brides wedding dress. On the wedding day, my friend/bride wore this beautiful white wedding dress. She looked absolutely beautiful. I honestly didn't see anything wrong with her or her dress. Sitting at the wedding we were hearing chitter chatter amongst the guest. To the disapproval of her family and guests, who knew that she was on her third marriage. Wearing white was a big deal. When a woman wears a white dress on her wedding day it symbolizes that; she is innocent, pure, goodness and a virgin. The color is considerate to be close to perfection. It was definitely not for a mother of five children, whom was on marriage number 3. It was very frowned upon. I didn't understand what was the big deal. I didn't know that wearing a white dress actually symbolizes something. From my Asian culture, we would dress up in our traditional Asian colorful garments and silk. White was not really every an option for a dress.
My friends wedding was beautiful. Her wedding turned out nice, they reception with off without any problems. I sat at the reception with her older family members that continued to discuss her choice of dress color. She was essentially breaking that the norms of what color dress to wear for someone who has been married before. I also went to my cousins wedding and she was an 18  year old virgin that was arranged to be married to a 40 year old man business man. The two families came to an agreement that the unmarried man would take my cousin under his wings and take care of her as his wife. The family settled on twenty five thousand dollars as dowry and for him to pay for the whole wedding cost for him to marry their daughter. I have honestly never seen a family talk about money as if they were selling their daughter to the highest bidder. I was raised in the United States my whole life and I use to think that all marriages comes from a place of love. My parents met on their wedding day, but I thought it was only something that was done in their country. I talked to my cousin and asked her if she was happy with marrying someone that she didn't know. She was okay with the idea. She looked at it like she was paying her parents back for raising her and an honorable decision. On her wedding day, she was dressed in beautiful colorful Asian garment. The wedding in the Southeast Asian Culture last three to give days. There was a prayer day, a monk chanting day, a family blessing day and the reception day. It was definitely a process. Going to both of their weddings made me want neither one of these for myself. I had a court marriage. my husband and I married in my mother in laws house in the living room with 20 of our family members and had a small reception and I went back to school and my husband went back to work and we met up back at the house and went to bed. He wanting a big beautiful wedding and I just wanted to make it legal, he went with what I wanted. Smart choice.

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(H)  425-431: Coontz, The American Family

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(H)  425-431: Coontz, The American Family

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Sitcoms from the 1950's were made to look like a cookie cutter family. Things seemed to be a lot better then they are today, simpler times. The show always has the fathers working to provide for his family, the mom stays at home to cook, clean and cared for their children. The children went to school and listened to their parents. Parents rarely communicated with one another. Dads came home reading the paper and moms continue doing all the domestic work. Everything just looked perfect. I use to watch that show, when I was much older, watching the re-runs and I use to think to myself that this was the way family were suppose to be. Fast forward to the present. That family unit that was depicted is rare. Both parents are now working outside the home and men are helping more with their children, well at least more then previous decades. Children are left to go to school and become more independent. Mothers aren't doing everything for their children and family. Children in the homes are expected to pull their weight. Children are washing dishes, cleaning, vacuuming, helping with laundry, even cooking small meals. Even with mom's working full time jobs, they still come home and have to do the domestic things at the home also, its just hard to keep up with. Parents are so busy, the  are often left to their own devices. Kids today also have ways of connecting with their parents when they are gone with their cell phones. These cellphones are children driving force in this "new world." They are able to socialize with their friends and boys or girls that they are interested in romantically. Being alone and often unsupervised allows kids/teens to get into relationship and sex at a much earlier age.
When we take a look at teens today, we think that they are wild, out of control, opinionated. They seem to be getting pregnant at an alarming rate. I have worked in OBGYN for over five years, that seems to be the case with our teens patients visiting our clinics with STD's (sexually transmitted diseases) and pregnancies. I use to ask myself, "why are we as parents letting our children, have sex?" "Who are watching these kids?" "Why are we not realizing that these children are sexually active?" My mom use to tell me that kids today are sleeping with each other at a very young age. But in looking at history, there has always been sexually active teen and pregnancies. "The rates of unwed childbearing tripled between 1940 and 1958, but most Americans didn't notice because unwed mother generally left town, gave their babies up for adoption and returned home as if nothing had happened." ( page. 427) We are just noticing more of teen pregnancies because the young women are announcing their pregnancies and keeping their baby. It was the same with STD's, there is an obligation from the the Medical facilities, Doctors and Staff to treat and report these STD's.  " In the early 1900's, doctors refused to believe that the cases of gonorrhea and syphilis they saw in young girls could have been caused by sexual abuse. Instead, they reasoned, girls could get their diseases from toilet seats, a myth that terrified generations of mothers and daughters." (page.427) Things were just done differently in the early and mid 1900's. It was okay to rape your wife and get away with it because it was not punishable by law because you are married and it is not considered a crime. Parents were able to beat their children with belts and even going as far as giving them broken bones and if asked by a doctor, the excuse would be that they fell off of a tree. Which explains a lot. With laws today, we protect the battered women and children. There are men and women getting arrested for such crimes. Even though it looks worst then it was before, there are now laws set out to protect women and children that are being abused. It has also lead to a high divorce rate because women aren't tolerating it any more. They are more independent, they earn their own money, able to pay for things that they want, If they aren't happy in a relationship, they are not staying the way that they were. Life is to short to be unhappy and with women knowing that, they won't put up with anything less. With peoples life expectancy going up from the 40's to the late 70's people aren't settling in marriages that they can see spending a lifetime in. The divorce rate will continue to climb. Things have changed from decades ago' Morals, Values and family structures, compared to what it was, the change has only been for the better.

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Required entry: JCB p. 243 Wedding Dreams

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Required entry: JCB p. 243 Wedding Dreams

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When I was younger, I wanted to  have a beautiful wedding. I dreamt of me in a beautiful white dress, standing across from my future husband who always had his face blurred out at the alter. I thought marriage was about husbands loving and catering to their wives. I don't know where I got that fantasy from but, my parents didn't live up to that, having come from parents that didn't know each other, they met for the first time on their wedding day. Knowing that my parents wedding was not they way I pictured weddings and marriages to be , It make me look at weddings differently. My parents did not love each other when they got married, that knowledge alone altered my thinking of weddings and marriage altogether. If I were to arrange a wedding or have a "do over" of what I wanted, it would be on the beach. The them would be a "Sports Themes Wedding" I would be in a beautiful Red 49ers dress. Not overwhelming in 49er design but settle amounts of the 49ers symbol. I love being barefoot and I would like my guest to experience the sand between their toes. I would have it on one of the beaches in San Francisco. I would have our immediately family only, especially with Covid-19 going around. I have always wanted a small intimate wedding. When I got married to my husband it was in his mothers living room with out closest family members and our Pastor. I just would like to do things that I wanted, and move it to the beach. I don't like attention, I'm an introvert, I don't like going to restaurants that sing to people for their birthdays. So, keeping things small, would be ideal for me.  Big white weddings are expensive, and it doesn't appeal to me. To me, the more that you spend on a wedding does not guarantee that you will be married forever. I spend a couple of hundred of dollars getting married to my husband and we have been married for almost 20 years. I don't have anything to prove to anyone. If I could plan a perfect wedding "do over" it would be on the beach with my husband and closest family members. A wedding don't have to be expensive or extravagant to make a marriage last, because at the end of the day, if you aren't marrying the wrong person for you, it would have all been all in vein.

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(H)      277-286: Eating Your Friends is the Hardest: The Survivors of the F-227.

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(H)      277-286: Eating Your Friends is the Hardest: The Survivors of the F-227.

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After reading this story, it gives me a different perspective about such a tragedy. When I was younger,  my teacher told me about the Donner Party, were then it was explained to me that it was the same situation. There was a plane crash and the survivors eat the decease to live. I use to think that was so gross, who can do that to someone, dead or alive. Now that I am older, well, I still think that it is gross, but I understand why the survivors of the crash in the Andes did that. The leader had to sort of talk the rest of the people into doing it by changing their views on eating corps. Even at one point stating that it was their duties to survive that event. Canessa, the self impose leader, brought it up to his close friends as an idea. Eating the bodies was  okay. "The bodies were no longer people. The soul was gone, he said, and the body was simply meat- and essential to their survival. They were growing weaker, and they could not survive without food." (page 279)
Slowly but surely, one by one, they followed him. He was the first person that had to eat the flesh, and he did as an example. At first, it was hard for people to do, they still looked at the meat as people. I definitely can understand that. Its was a hard decision for the survivors, but when self preservation comes into play, I feel as though people will always choose to do what they feel as being wrong to survive. As were some that could never eat, because the were disgusted because it was people that they knew and also that they would be eating a human. After a while they started developing rules of what parts of the body that they would eat and not eat. "They refused to eat certain parts of the body- the lungs, the skin, the head and the genitals." (page 281)  I don't blame them at all. I don't think that I can ever eat a corps, nonetheless, the person head and genitals. That is beyond what I can imagine for myself. The survivor were eventually rescued, when they sent Canessa, Parrado, and Vinzintin to go search for help. We can always look at a situation like this tragedy and say "I would never do that, it's disgusting!" I completely agree. In the end it is for survival. Canessa, had to justify it was just eating meat and that they are no longer human. For me, whether a person is alive or dead, they are still human. Eating someone is the last resort to survival for the survivor, many of us would probably have done the same being in that situation. The best part of that statement is that we are blessed not to have been put in that situation where we would have to find out that answer.

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(H)      315-321: Zimbardo, The Pathology of Imprisonment.

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(H)      315-321: Zimbardo, The Pathology of Imprisonment.

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When we hear stories of prisoners being mistreated, we often think to ourselves that they are all harden criminals with no conscience, no feelings, no remorse about the crime that they have done. Whether it be armed robbery, molestation, rape, murders, assault, embezzlement, manslaughter, domestic violence...etc. To the world, the criminals being in prison is them paying their debt to society. They are getting what they "deserve," and to the family members of the people that they have harmed or killed, that may be true. There has been a lot of controversy with how the prison system has been treating the prisoners as if they are not even human, prisoners are beaten, sexually assaulted, use of excessive force, and kicked...etc. Those whom are in power in the prison, often mistreat the prisoners. They have the ability to put prisoners in lockdown or solitary confinement. "Solitary Confinement is a for of imprisonment distinguish by living in a single cells with little or no meaningful contact to other inmates, strict measures to control contraband, and the use of additional security measures and equipment." I can not imagine a life where I am put in a cell for so long, by myself, with no contact with other people for 23 out of 24 hours of the day. Alone in my thoughts. The silence would be deafening. A prisoner in the chapter was released from Solitary confinement after spending 37 months in there. 37 month? That is the equivalent over 3 years of being in a small space, by himself, not being able to have contact with anyone but guards that are there to give him his meals. It's no wonder people are going crazy. My uncle was in prison for over ten years, he was being harassed by fellow inmates and got into a fight that caused a lockdown and the guards put him in solitary confinement, in a small dark cell by himself for 5 days, he said that he was going crazy. He, just like most people in this world, need social interactions. He still haunted by memories of his time in prison. When asked about his experience he often drift off, as if he is back in prison and solitary confinement. He always talk about prison guards treating them like animals. He says as soon as the guards get their badges, it goes straight to their head. They become blinded by the power that they have over the prisoners. Even in an environment where people were screened to be a part of a mock prison study. 2 dozen people were picked. "Half were arbitrarily designed as prisoners by a flip of a coin, the others as guards. These were the roles they were to play in the simulated prison. The guards were made aware of the potential seriousness and danger of the situation and their own vulnerability. They made up their own formal rules for maintaining law, order, and respect, and were generally free to improvise
new ones during their eight-hour, three-man shifts." (316)  " At the end of only six days we had to close down the mock prison because of what we saw was frightening. It was no longer apparent to most of the subjects (or to us) where reality ended and their roles began. The majority had indeed become prisoners or guards, no longer able to clearly differentiate between roles playing and self. There were dramatic changes in virtually every aspects of their behavior, thinking, and feeling. In less than a week the experience if imprisonment undid (temporarily) a life time of learning; human values were suspended, self concepts were challenged, and the ugliest, most base, pathological side of human nature surfaced." (page. 317)
During this experiment, the people that were doing the experiment seen boys turn into treat others or prisoner like animals, the took pleasure in other peoples pain. Although it was a short experiment, it had a profound effect on the people involved. The prisoners were growing in hatred for the guards. The prison guards were consumed with power. It goes to show up that even in a mock situation that was (fake) people were still overwhelmed by their situation. So we can only imagine how it would be in a "real" prison. Power does things to even the more kindest of person.

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 (H)      322-334: Rosenhan, On Being Sane in Insane Places.

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 (H)      322-334: Rosenhan, On Being Sane in Insane Places.

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There such a stigma with being diagnosed with an mental disorder. I don't think you can look at a persons and just be able to tell if they are sane or insane. Just as looking at a person and knowing whether or not they had AIDS for instance. So many key factors goes into diagnose and treatment. If we were able to tell from the outside who looked crazy, most serial killers that have been committed these horrible murders are what people would think as "normal looking." They definitely remained under the radar for a long time before they were caught. In this chapter, there were 8 people that infiltrated different mental facilities. "After calling the hospital for an appointment, the pseudo-patient arrived at the admission office complaining that he had been hearing voices." (page, 325) Before entrance to the mental facility, they cease all symptoms of abnormality, other pseudo-patients showed nervousness and anxiety, so they won't give the staff suspicion of being a fraud. The pseudo-patients were in the facility taking notes, before it was in private so that staff would not see, but after the figured out that the staff were not interested in that they were doing or writing, they starting taking notes of events in public. The other patients were the only ones that were suspicious of the pseudo-patients. They believe that they were journalist, investigators or people that were there to audit the facility. They noticed the pseudo-patients and were paying attention to what they were doing. " Nursing records for three patients indicate that they writing was seen as an aspect of their pathological behavior. "Patient engages in writing behavior" was the daily nursing comment on one of the pseudo-patient who was never questioned about his writing. Given that the patient is in the hospital, he must be psychologically disturbed. And given that he is disturbed continuous writing must be a behavioral manifestation of that disturbance, perhaps a subset of the compulsive behavioral that are sometimes correlated with schizophrenia." (page. 330)
The pseudo-patient was indeed not insane or did he had schizophrenia, but to be label that has such a great effect on a person's life. Misdiagnosed of a disease can bring someone great job if found not to be true, as in something believed to be cancer and it was not. When someone is labelled, "Schizophrenic" "manic-depressive" and "insane." It's on them for life. Even when a patient is not crazy, just the mere label of being crazy, can cause people to think that they are and start acting that way. "Psychiatric diagnoses are rarely found to be error. The label sticks, a mark of inadequacy forever." (page. 332)

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  (H)      470-480: Hunt, Police Accounts of Normal Force.

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  (H)      470-480: Hunt, Police Accounts of Normal Force.

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Police Officers were taught in the Academy different types of forces to use in different situation with suspects. " In the formal world of the police academy, the recruits learns to account for force by reference to legality. He or she is issued the regulation instruments and trained to use them to subdue, control, and restrain a suspect. It threatened with great bodily harm, the officer learns that he can justifiably use deadly force and fire his revolver, Yet the recruits is taught that he cannot use his baton, jack, or gun unnecessarily to torture, maim, or kill a suspect. When the recruits leave the formal world of the academy and are assigned to patrol a district, they are introduced to an informal world in which police recognize normal as legal and brutal force." (page 471)
In a mans world, women are believed to be the weaker of the two. There is not difference in the police world. Women as assumed to be non confrontational. They are viewed as incompetent as "street cop," until they prove otherwise. Women have to work hard to be accepted by her peers. She has to show that she is equally or more aggressive then her male counter parts to get respect. A female officer in this chapter had entered a store that was being robbed. The suspect points his gun at her. She pulls her weapon and points it at her. He tells her that his partner has a gun pointed at the back of her head. She doesn't flinch and refuses to put down her weapon. Her sergeant enters the store and orders the suspect to drop his weapon and he did. She thought that she did the right thing. She was being looked at as incompetent. She should have shot the suspect. Many veterans said she "had a lot of balls," to have her gun drawn at him and not giving into the suspects demands. Other officers said that she made a rookie mistake, she should have shot the guy right away. Her peers were spreading rumors about her. Her sergeant said that she acted in a cowardly manner. She was sad and depressed. She vowed that next time she was going to shoot the suspect. She had a change in her thought that if she did that, that her peers would accept her.  Police officers tries to justify any excessive force on a suspect it the suspect physically or symbolically threatens the officers. " In one case, an officer was punched in the face by a prisoner he had just apprehended for allegedly attempting to shoot a friend. The incident occurred in the stationhouse, and several policemen observed the exchange. Immediately, one officer hit the prisoner in the jaw and the rest immediately joined in the brawl." Violation to the police property, such as uniform, car and hat, will be considered a symbolic attack. Recently, the United States have been protesting police brutality towards Black People and African American with the "Black Lives Matter Movement." Police officers are using any reason to use excessive force on black men and women. Black men are being pulled over and for simple traffic stops and they are being beaten or killed. I do believe that there are the actions of few police officers that are doing that. I don't think that "ALL" police officers are bad. They many bad seeds are definitely effecting the other police officers. I see it all the time, my husband is a hard working black man and I am an Asian woman, If we are together, when he is pulled over, we generally get let off with a warning. When he is by himself, I fear for him and my son and daughter. The police brutality is real. There are cops out here killing people. I pray that my children don't ever encounter a cop like that. I pray that my children will try their best to cooperate, even when people are, they are still dying. We live in a society where police officers are using excessive force all the time. They have something to prove to their peers. I have to teach my children that all people should be treated fairly and just because they wear a badge, that beating or shooting suspects out of anger or fear, doesn't make them right.

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For the next week take note of whenever you find yourself thinking or feeling someone else is “weird” or “crazy.”  Pick one or two examples and write a blog post that covers the following issues and questions:

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For the next week take note of whenever you find yourself thinking or feeling someone else is “weird” or “crazy.”  Pick one or two examples and write a blog post that covers the following issues and questions:

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I recently went to dinner with my friends, We have been friends for many years. We were eating at the table and one of our friend, leaned to the side and farted so loud and so long, while we were at the dinner table, eating out food. I thought to myself that it was utterly disgusting. My other friend and I looked at her and was shocked that she would do such a thing. I figured that it was because she was very comfortable with us and was able to be herself. The social norm was not to fart at the dinner table, especially when people are eating. Which reminded me of my dad. He says that burping and farting at the table shows people that their food was delicious. I was asking him which side that came from and her said that it came from his Chinese side. I don't know my Chinese side of the family, but I had always assumed that he did it that way because that was the norm for him and his household. My siblings and I use to laugh so much our stomachs would hurt. Even when we had guest over, that were close friends of his he would burp and shortly after, he would fart. It wasn't until we were teenagers that we told out dad that in America, it was rude to burp and fart. It was disgusting and smelled really bad. When my friend did that, It made me think of my dad. I looked at my friend as inappropriate and we informed her that we appreciate the fact that we are comfortable with farting and burping at the dinner table, but we need for her to step away when she is doing so. She laughed and never said that it was an accident. I believed that she did that to see how we would react. That would have to fall under the weird category for me.
Another incident that happened that I thought was "crazy" was that we are currently in a Pandemic. Covid-19 has been taking over the World. People are being diagnosed by the thousands, everyday. We are now moved back into the Purple Tier. The most restrictive Tier out of all of them. There are now even mask mandates that we have to put a mask on when we are in public areas to protect us and others from being sick.
I have really been keeping up with the mask wearing, sanitizing and hand washing. I am in the healthcare field and a mom of two, I'm use to it.  I took my children to "Black Friday" one of the biggest shopping days headed to Christmas. I was looking in a bin for back packs for my children. It was only two dollars and that was a steal. I saw out of the corner of my eye a woman looking the the same bin across from me. She coughed looking into the bin. The cough sound really clear to me, then she coughed again! I looked up and she had her mask pulled down where all you can see was her face with her make under her chin. She stood at least 4ft 11in, heavy set, Asian lady. I was so upset. I said, "Ma'am, you are coughing and you are not wearing your mask correctly!" She looked up and I had already walked away for her. She said that she only coughed into the bin of backpacks? Why? What I wanted to say, I couldn't because my children were around. I was honestly mad, just the disregard for other people. After I left, there were other that went to the bin and stood next to her as she did not have her mask pulled up properly as she proceeded to once again, cough all over the bin. The norm is that we as a country is suppose to wear masks. We need to be mindful of others when we are coughing and sneezing. The woman did not have a care in the world. She was freely spreading her germs everywhere in Wal-Mart.  I have to learn that I have to make sure that I have to take precautions with myself and for my family. I know that I have no control over other people and their actions. Wearing masks are our new norms in our society. Whether we agree or not, in order to go to a store to shop or to go to any business, we have to wear one. Not wearing one use to be an option, but now, it could mean your life.

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 (H)  446-460: Gracey,  Kindergarten as Academic Boot Camp.

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 (H)  446-460: Gracey,  Kindergarten as Academic Boot Camp.

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I have been in many Kindergarten classrooms. I have two children and a plethora of nieces and nephews before I even had children. I use to volunteer in their schools. I never associated the experience of being in the classroom with them, to them being socialized and trained to conform to the worlds standards. In this reading, He writes on Kindergarteners before that is the beginning of everything as far as education. They are taught their abc's and their 123's. They are taught their colors and shapes. The biggest thing that they are taught is to be different from home. If they are allowed to get away with acting up or stepping out of line from time to time, school is going to get them "trained" for their future. When the children are in school, they have to listen to the teacher. They are taught that they always have to respect and listen to authority figures. They have to walk in single file lines before escorted to their classrooms and when they are entering and exiting the school. The children from my memory of my children classrooms, would freeze when the school bell rung. They then were conformed to when the principal had to make the announcements they would stand still. The lead staff member would then blow their whistle and instruct the children, grade by grade to slowly move to the line with their teachers where standing. The lines went from kindergarten to the sixth grade. They would always start with the younger kids. If one of the children were caught running to their class line, they would have to stand next to the principal as an example of how "not to act," for the other children to see. It showed the other kids that they didn't want to be "bad" or a "rebel" by not listening to authority figures. Once the kindergarteners would walk with their teacher, they were told to have the line as straight as possible. The distance from one child to the next was an arm length. They reminded me of little soldiers. I always walked my daughter to class. I use to try to make conversations with her while walking by her side and she would always look at me like tell me that "we can't talk in line mommy." I would realize that I was also being socialize to the schools rules also. I would walk her to class and the kids would naturally take off their backpacks and jackets and hang them up at the class number that was assigned. I noticed that everything had a number. It was as if they didn't have names anymore, that they went by numbers as their identity. I started thinking about this reading and comparing it to my experience with my children. As we get older, we are numbers. I have to enter my social security number, date of birth, license number, school identification number, work /employee badge number...etc. As grown ups living in this world, we are identified by numbers. I started connecting that doing this socialization and  making these children conform at an early age is what the teachers were trained to do. Most of the times that I had gotten a call for my child was when she kept getting up, talking out of turn and not wanting to put her supplies away. She was setting the example of how not to act in a classroom setting. My daughter, even at the age that she is now, eight years old, was a "why?" kid.  Why do we have to do that? Why is that the right way? Why cant' I just do it this way? She was not easily "trained" by her teacher or anyone else to say the least. Slowly but surely, she eventually learned that her teacher was just trying to help her. We always remind her that she may not like following others, but in life, family, jobs...etc, she will not always like what she is being told or rules that she has to abide by, but that is how society works. We stress the importance of education. In this chapter, "the term education is used...to refer to a system if schools, in which specifically designated person are expected to teach children and youth certain types of acceptable behavior. The school system becomes a...unit in the total social structure and is recognized by the members of the society as a separate social institution. Within this structure a portion of the total socialization process occurs." (page. 448) Children basically are expected to learn routines and how not to question authority figures on what they are being taught. Teaching the kids how to be obedient. They will either conform and be "good students" or step out of the box and fight the system and be labelled as "bad students." It is always interesting to see the kids follow these same routines day in and day out. Even when the children would step out of line, they kept it within what was still permissible, not to go to far off course. After reading this chapter, I don't want my child to conform to their teachers and become a sheep waiting to be led around with not being able to really express their thoughts and concerns. On the other hand I don't want them to disrespect authority figures either and get the label or a rebel or a "bad" person. I am glad that my children to go school and get their socialization and training on school and how to become a decent human being in society and are also able to relay their questions and concerned to me, when they get home. I believe that they are pretty balanced children.

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Grand Theory and what would they say about illegal drug use?

Social Conflict Theorist would say illegal drug use is primarily a problem of structural inequality and class conflict and class issue. "Much drug use in poor urban areas results from the poverty, racial inequality, and other conditions affecting people in these locations." The lower class minorities would be more subject to doing drugs. They are the ones that are more likely to suffer negative consequences from illegal drug use. They are the ones that are most likely not able to get help for their addiction. The corner drugstores are in the poor neighborhoods, They sell alcohol, beer, and cigarettes, often time highly addictive to people in the community, keeping them addicted and living in those neighborhood.

The Symbolic Interactionism Theory would say that they illegal drug use is based on the person. It starts off with turning to drugs as trying it out and then it leads to using drugs on a bad day to cope with life. The drug usage eventually becomes addictive. Now it progressed to the person using it from time to time to everyday.

Functionalism Theory: Drug use is a part of society. It gives drug dealers a way to make a lot of money to support themselves and their families. It helps drug users get a "good feeling" from using drugs. Drugs can help with pain and provide other positive effects. It provides a way for people at a disadvantage to live. The criminal justice jobs; police officer, judges, parole officers, prison guards...etc. This theory looks at the whole picture of drug selling and drug abuse a contribution to a dysfunctional society.