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Being a toddler has to be rough. I can see my little two-year-old girl experiencing many emotions and becoming incredibly frustrated with her inability to fully communicate them verbally. While most of the time I am good at remaining calm and attend to her needs, there are times when my pregnant self will also join the frustration wagon and cry with my toddler. This observation led me to understand that I needed to be more proactive in learning to become regulated and model self-regulating for Zoe to observe and learn.

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Ever since Zoe could pick up a pen, it became evident that doodling was an easy way for her to connect with calm. Paint days at daycare are her absolute favorite and I am now a proud owner of many original pieces of artwork. Knowing about my child's affinity with art, which is also true about myself, made it natural for me to select art as the practice we could do together to help us deescalate overwhelming and frustrating daily situations.

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Since Zoe is still into eating random things, including markers, play-doh, and paint, I decided to do a little research into non-toxic paint that we could mess with in the less stressful way possible. I figured that any parent, anxiety prone or not, could benefit from knowing that the paint being used will not be harmful to the child in case it is swallowed.

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I briefly introduced the paint and drawing pad the night before day 1 to measure Zoe's level of interest. As expected her response was positive. I decided to do a full paint session the following day, including music, which you can see on the video. What I noticed was that Zoe was fully engaged, while I was a little distracted trying to document what was happening. I was also fully committed to knowing the whereabouts of the paint caps at all times, which was somewhat stressful. As a result, I can say that our first experiment was very enjoyable for Zoe, but her mother struggled a little bit with letting go of control. Once I was able to put the phone down and be with her as a participant, the experience became a lot more pleasant.

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I've made an effort to be mindful of her style and try to match it, for the most part. Zoe will typically find it amusing to paint over my doodles or to chase my paint tracks with hers as if we were playing a game of tag with paint, which is a play therapy intervention that I played with older kids. She is a natural at it and it always makes her giggle.

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Since it became clear that Aba (Dad in Hebrew) could also benefit from tapping into a more mindful state, Zoe and I decided to invite him for a session. Aba reported that his mood significantly improved after spending 2o minutes painting with his daughter. He also reported not feeling like he needed to be on his smartphone at that very moment, which is his biggest attention black hole. I was able to observe mood attunement between Aba and Zoe throughout that morning as a result of a single paint/music session.

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Boats and boating--Equipment and supplies

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Some days Zoe will be content with one page, some days she will need several pages. Like anyone else, it depends on her mood and her level of energy. Nonetheless, her eyes continue to glow the same way each time the drawing pad comes out to play. We are currently having two to three sessions each week. Sometimes we use it as a tool to help deescalate intense emotions and sometimes we engage "just because".

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"Why paint with only one had if I can paint with both?" appears to be Zoe's motto. Music appears to have a direct impact on how intensely she interacts with media. We do not use classical music all the time, and we definitely play a wild and random variety of music. I began to compile a playlist for her since before she was born in Spotify and I continue to add music to it as we go. I've been playing her music from that list since she was in the womb. However, there isn't a single song that beats "Baby Shark" these days.

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Session 12 was very productive and it came about after experiencing big emotions related to frustration. Zoe prefers to use glass cups over her (safe) plastic cups. When I refuse to give her a glass cup it typically leads to a meltdown. Once more, art saved the day. However, Zoe reacted strongly when I tried to include her name on the artwork. She immediately and emphatically said "no, no, no", and proceeded to write and scratch her name off. She was OK having mom continue to collaborate with her, but it was obvious that words did not have a place in this piece of work.

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We had Mia as a special guest for Session 15. Mia is Zoe's cousin and the are only 10 days apart in age. Zoe and Mia get along really well together. Zoe was having a rough day because she woke up abnormally early. Needless to say, I was also having a rough day because of the same reason. We did not have our tempera paint or art pad that day because we were out, so we had an improvised art session with a coloring book and some crayons that were provided by Mia's mom, AKA our hero. Zoe's mood significantly improved after having a coloring session with her cousin. In addition, Zoe needed extra hugs and cuddles that day, which helped us both regulate back to a balanced state.

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Our art pad is no longer sufficient for my little artist and she is now exploring body paint. I can officially say that I am no longer concerned with the tempera stick caps. As a result, we've lost a few colors due to drying out. Despite this inconvenience, I've learned that the world did not end and that we can and will manage without having a pink color stick. I also realized that as much as I wanted to document every session, I really enjoyed giving myself permission to be present and without an electronic device during most sessions.

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We are currently exploring new types of media and surfaces to paint on. Using a paintbrush provides a new layer of complexity that Zoe appears to enjoy. I am at awe at the level of intensity and focus she offers to each one of her pieces, regardless of what else is going on around us.

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This has been a wonderful experience. It made me feel more grounded and even more connected to my daughter. She now hands me blank sheets or pens and shakes her head in an assertive way that makes me understand that she is ready to paint. It also makes me feel more connected to my father, who is responsible for my love of art. I feel peace knowing that I am passing on this trait to my child and that they enjoy it as much as I do. I feel gratitude knowing that for now we can share a space of creativity and love, where we both just get to be and do.