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My Final Reflection Video Part 2! I hope that the next set of Language In Service Interns find what makes them excited & motivated. I think that is the most important aspect of the internship: to learn what makes you excited and what it connects to!

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My Final Reflection Video Part 1

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I hope to get to travel here at some point too. I love Thai food, and would love to experience the culture as well!

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S1E3 of Egg & Bloom centers around Latin America in terms of women's reproduction. This episode is called "(re)Productive Seedling" We explore women's reproductive rights, women's reproductive health, and more!

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My favorite state! If I could go anywhere right now, I would go to Acadia National Park. There, I would a hike, and find a mountain to sit atop. In my head, mountaintops are the ideal location to write. I also hope to live here in the future as a professor.

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Don't be so hard on yourself & stop trying to do everything. If life was a build your own breakfast bar, you would not pile sausages, pancakes, eggs, and home fries onto your plate. You would make an educated decision. That is to say, you would choose what made the most sense to do in the short term and the long term. What would keep you the most full? Eggs or waffles? What goes the best together? Certainly not, eggs and pancakes as that would be an odd combination. All the while I am writing this I am thinking about the Williams Inn that had a lovely build your own breakfast bar! Based on that stream of thoughts, do you understand why the way you are living now can be potentially detrimental? Each day you work from morning to night and put the weight of the world on your shoulders. Love, you are not Atlas. This life is yours; this body is your; this path is yours. Why make it so challenging to the point where you do not enjoy the moment?

I believe that you were to stop putting pressure on yourself to do everything at this very moment and live the life you want to live, then you will end up where I am today. Living in Brunswick, not New Brunswick, Maine, not even a five minute drive from Bowdoin College where you take your kids to the art museum on days off when you are not teaching from a naturally lit lecture hall. You can end up in this place if you prioritize your intellectual growth, your personal health, and your genuine love for learning. I promise you that living your dream life of lifelong education & learning is in reach. But don't forget to live in the moment and enjoy the experience. Take a deep breath, Zoe. You can't live without oxygen. Just like how you can't live without properly nourishing yourself with reading, creating, and communicating with people.

Once you start living in this mindful, healthful, and happy way, you will gain many important experiences such as learning how to go deeper into tasks, to specialize, and how to better reach a flow state. This summer is going to be an important one. You are going to learn how to work full time and time management. You are going to be doing real research and developing your future passions. However, before you can do that, you need to take your finals and complete final projects. No half a**ing your work. I know that you so easily do it and get by, but you actually putting in that effort is going to change not only your studying habits, but your understanding of the world around you. Also, you are going to feel really good once you finish everything after putting all that hard work into it!

Today, I still think of the pandemic whenever I hear Joanie Mitchell or Taylor Swift's albums like Evermore. Or when I occasionally go to Christie Hoffman Park when visiting Mom and Dad. That feeling of isolation though has dissipated completely. I am constantly surrounded by students or other faculty or other humans to chat with and hug on the occasion. Also, peanut butter reminds me greatly of the pandemic along with miso salmon. I can't eat peanut butter and oatmeal without getting slightly nauseous as the memory of having that in my stomach while swimming is so powerful. Whenever I hear the word Zoom my skin tends to get a bit itchy. Whenever I hear the word asynchronous my eyes start to tear up. Unfortunately, it seems that some torments never dissipate.

I hope that your main takeaways from this will be to prioritize yourself and live life to get you where I am today. I promise that it is more than feasible if you take a deep breath and step back. You need to know what is truly important, or should I say essential, for you to survive & make a difference. Much love from myself to you & best of luck with the end of Spring 2021!

Yours truly,

Thirty-Nine-Year-Old Zoe

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Prompted Piece: Letter to Your Past Self Written in Spring 2041

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Dear Nineteen-Year-Old Zoe, Don't be so hard on yourself & stop trying to do everything. If life was a build your own breakfast bar, you would not pile sausages, pancakes, eggs, and home fries onto your plate. You would make an educated decision.

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The location of Rutgers University. The place where I plan to grow over the next three years. I am so excited to attend and continue learning about the world and myself. This opportunity for education is one that I plan to cherish and make the most of!

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My fall semester started over the summer of 2020. I reviewed chemistry material because I wanted to be prepared for class and not be utterly confused. The last time I took chemistry was AP Chemistry in sophomore year of high school (about three years from writing this). My mind could not remember that material quite well. However, the material that would later be in my general chemistry 2 class at Rutgers was what skimped out on as I got lazy within the last few weeks before school. Once, I started class I realized that I was going to have to do more work than I expected. General chemistry 2 is not a class that one can go to class and do well in. For me at least, I needed to review material daily to grow my understanding. That class along with introduction to honors hispanic literature were the most challenging for me. Those two classes helped me realize what the college work load is and how I can study for it to achieve my goal of a high GPA!

Taking online classes during COVID was hard for me during senior year (last spring). I did not have motivation and instead floated by. Honestly, I am still unsure of how my six AP exams went well. That time period feels as if I was in a fever dream due to the stress and uncertainty from choosing college. Without the college decision uncertainty, I was able to focus during my first semester of college. I figured out my daily plan of studying and a good organization system. How did I end up finding a lab and two internships in my first semester? I reached out to people through emailing, one of my strengths. My outgoing spirit led me to speak with many people finding the best opportunities for myself and tons of advice. I got to speak with deans in the Honors College along with upperclassmen. This helped me to know that I was on the right track and create a support system for myself of people that I could go to when I had questions. For example, multiple upperclassmen who are in the Honors College and Douglass Residential College were great mentors for me. I also grew a few relationships in organizations (ex: HC Media Team and One Health) and classes (Chemistry and Microbiology Seminar). The experience of building these relationships is one that I am incredibly grateful for during this virtual time.

I want to include a few sentences about what I want to improve for this coming semester. My attention needs to be more direct as I finally stifle my habit of multitasking. If I have three goals for the day, it will streamline my day. I also would like to do my school work in a more mindful way where I am ahead of the game and know why I am doing everything. With my learning itself, I need to dive in to actually understand the material rather than memorizing information. This gift of education is something that I want to take advantage of.

Something that added to my school year was my foundation. By foundation, I am referring to the daily healthy routines. For me, it included exercising daily by going for a run, walking, doing yoga, core exercises, biking, and swimming. During the last month, I developed the morning routine of meditating when I wake up. Meditation clears my mind, and in those moments I become aware of all the thoughts circulating in my head. My diet is what my parents cook (organic, gluten free, and less processed), however, I do not think I eat healthy yet. I still overeat sometimes, but over the last few months I became more aware and appreciative of my body. My final foundation is journaling daily. This connected me to my thoughts and slow me down. It increased my gratitude for the experience I had and gave me tangible reference to look back on for this crazy year.

Choosing what to pursue formed the most difficult challenge for me this semester. With organizations, preprofessional activities, summer programs, and scholarships, I had many options to choose from. My initial urge is to do everything and anything. However, I create focuses to direct my activities based on my passions. Moreover, I told myself to only chose 3-5 organizations, by providing this number it helps me forge a limit for myself. Gaining the focus of applying for a MD/PhD program gives me a deeper direction where I am motivated in every activity I do so that I can combine my love for researching, education, and interpersonal care.

What did I learn this semester? I learned about Spanish literature, medical sociology, and how cool microbiology is! Hispanic literature taught me about literature and Spanish itself. Medical sociology exposed me to all the demographical facets that influence health. My microbiology seminar helped me realize how engaging science is for me. This drove me to want to combine my curiosity for science and love for working with others through MD/PhD programs. These classes along with the tutoring others pushed me to understand the importance of speaking. Furthermore, vocally sharing complex ideas with people who have different levels of education is a goal for me because at the moment I have room for improvement.

Lastly, I wanted to mention where my organizational system is. My system for the fall semester was chaotic. I switch from google calendar to Notion to my bullet journal with variations of all three trying to use each for every activity. Now, I plan on using a tribrid with Notion, my bullet journal, and google calendar. Notion will be used for weekly, months, and seasonal goals (long term engagements) along with my record of meetings and media. In addition, Notion includes the ability for me to create a vision board and tables for all my projects such as applications, this blog, and more. My bullet journal will serve as a daily activity log where I will write my three activities for the day, what I am grateful for, one thing I learned, and what media I took in. Google calendar where hold my meetings, classes, and other time activities.

Thoughts for this coming season, spring semester 2021, I want to use my tribrid system, be mindful in my education, and retain a strong health foundation.

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First Summit Reached: First Year Fall Semester Low Down

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My fall semester started over the summer of 2020. I reviewed chemistry material because I wanted to be prepared for class and not be utterly confused. The last time I took chemistry was AP Chemistry in sophomore year of high school (about three years from writing this).

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In the future, I plan to visit this country. My cousins live here, and the country is beautiful. Also, I heard that Lord of the Rings was filmed here, and I happen to be in a relationship with someone who greatly loves Lord of the Rings.

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The first time I travelled to the West Coast was in second grade. It was also my first time seeing the Pacific Ocean. I loved dipping my feet in the bay and looking at the tidal pools. My cousins live there so my family wanted to say hello! We went to Lego Land and it was quite warm for March.

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The summer of my junior year, I flew on a plane alone to England to meet up with an old friend! It was intimidating being a sixteen year old woman flying alone, but I figured out how to navigate things and felt really independent.

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Yizhou, are first guest of Egg & Bloom, is from China. I am so grateful to have her on the podcast to share her experiences with womanhood. Check out S1E2 "Let's Grow With Yizhou" for more information.

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My Mom's Birthplace. To learn more about this & me as a person, give S1E1 of Egg & Bloom a listen. That episode is called, "A Love Letter to All Women." I hope you enjoy.

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We are creating an ongoing conversation on womanhood, specifically women's health and the transition from girl to woman! The episodes will alternate between the grow (narrative) and cafe date (chat).

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Welcome to the place where I grew up. I spent most of my life here, exploring nature, exploring the libraries, and exploring relationships!