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1) some of them had clear examples some were confusing.
2) majority of them were weak
3) by taking things they know and/or experienced before
4)make sure you have all three major parts of the essay

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1)  They have different examples and some thesis's are stronger than others.
2) each writer had a different thesis statement but the last one was very confusing and all over the place.
3) they had different mind sets on their examples while some where strong and some were weak.
4) think your writing through and dont rush it, plan it thrugh and not write whatever comes to mind.

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1 Plan ahead and prepare for the essay by forming a structure. 2 They were weak and the writer doesn't understand the importance of a strong thesis statement. 3 With things they seem to enjoy or admire. 4 To plan and structure before tackling the prompt.

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The last essay was weak and they stayed with one only subject and did not have an example.But the other essays were pretty good and had all the info as to the conflict, thesis, thesis statement, conclusion, and last but not least the example on the prompt of the essay.

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The last essay was weak and they stayed with one only subject and did not have an example.But the other essays were pretty good and had all the info as to the conflict, thesis, thesis statement, conclusion, and last but not least the example on the prompt of the essay.

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Evelyn Ramirez

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1) One of the writers did not include a thesis statement, and another writer did not have a clear example.

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1) One of the writers did not include a thesis statement, and another writer did not have a clear example.

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2) They were not very strong in my opinion.
3) By using celebrities and things around them.
4) Make sure to include a strong thesis, example, and power sentence.

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1- the essay wasn't that weak and i actually dont think the thesis statement wasn't that bad but of course they can do better.

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1- the essay wasn't that weak and i actually dont think the thesis statement wasn't that bad but of course they can do better.

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1- the essay was weak
2-the thesis were all different
3-By using real life situations

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1-the essay was weak because of different opinions
2-they had a good essay with strong a strong thesis
3-they used examples related to the thesis
4-try to summarized everthing up

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2) they have different thesis
3) it is based on reality

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2) they have different thesis
30 itz based on reality

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      Amarion Atkins                                     1)Everyone has a different style and opinion.2)It is very strong,and complete.3)By thinking of movies and things that happen in real life.4)Keep on what you are doing .

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      Amarion Atkins                                     1)Everyone has a different style and opinion.2)It is very strong,and complete.3)By thinking of movies and things that happen in real life.4)Keep on what you are doing .

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each essay wasn't that bad in my opinion but some were better than others.

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1. The writers have different styles of writing.
2. Some of the the writers had a lot of details in their essays. They also had very stong power sentence and very good thesis'
3. They used the correct words that connected the examples to the thesis'.
4. Just continue to write and write and let people judge them and practice and practice and you'll get better.

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1. The essay was weak and didn't have a strong thesis.
2. He got everything and had a strong thesis and good example.
3. Had a good thesis and lacked a good example.

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1) All the writers have a different way and style of writing and their ideas are nothing alike.
2) Some thesis statements were weak and others were decent but when it came to the examples all writers started writing about different things or just kept repeating over and over.
3) I feel like they developed their examples quickly out of the blue because none of them were clear nor on task.
4) I advice them to keep on writing and go over the principles of writing and also to take the time to think over their thesis, examples and power sentence better.

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1.) all authors have a different style of writing
2.) have different thesis
3.) they based it on real life
4.) need more examples

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1. The writers have different styles of writing.
2. Some of the the writers had a lot of details in their essays. They also had very stong power sentence and very good thesis'
3. They used the correct words that connected the examples to the thesis'.
4. Just continue to write and write and let people judge them and practice and practice and you'll get better.

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They all have different  writing styels and different topics to talk about. I have noticed that they have different thesis statments.

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1) They all have different writing styles and examples.
2) They all have good to excellent writing styles.
3) The first two essays developed their example  really well, but the last one needs a better example.
4) They need better more concrete examples.

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1. 1. writer has a conversation with someone, it's not uncommon for their mind to wonder. 2. They’re thesis statements are really strong 3. They use the correct way to word what he rights and uses the examples well done. 4 . To practice there writing to get better at writing and know how to write essays

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1) The writers have different writing styles.
2) Some writers had a lot of depth in their essays. They also had a strong thesis and an excellent power sentence. Some had a good thesis statement, but lack a cohesive example. Some writers didn't even have a good thesis statement.
3) They used more historic examples like MJ, and Ben Franklin, etc.
4) Use spellcheck and make sure you don't go off topic. Also make sure your thesis statement and examples are clear.

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1) They all used different writing examples and styles. 2) I noticed that some of them used a lot of depth and had very strong thesis while others were very weak and just didn't really have a clear statement of what the thesis was. 3) They used real world examples, more historic, with Michael Jordan and Benjamin Franklin etc.4) Make sure to not get off topic and to make your thesis statement clear and to provide strong examples that give depth to what the question is asking.

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1)

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1. some actually used examples and used details to go in depth about their thesis 2.they were strong and normally at the first paragraph 3.they stared talking about different cases 4.use spellcheck

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1) Different examples and writting styles
2) Some are weake while others are strong
3) by buliding up facts around them
4) be more specific  and more sophisticated sentences

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1) All the writers are very different in the way they right and the way they organize their stories.
2) I noticed that some stories were very hard to find the thesis and some were very strong.
3) They all pretty much developed their examples by saying what it was and then connecting it to the thesis in the power sentence.
4) I suggest trying to organize their stories an little better and to make sure they have a strong thesis and a clear power sentence.

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1) each essay wasn't that bad in my opinion but some were better than others. some had thesis while others didn't. and they a;; have an example.
2) some writers had a thesis and others didn't. and one wasn't strong.
3) they developed their ideas by what the prompt was about.
4) for them i would say have a stronger thesis, and make more sophisticated sentences.

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1)  Something was missing and missing a thesis
2)  Third one had a week thesis and the 2nd had a better one
3) Essay 2 had a good and they should try to connect more.

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They all had similar though different structure .

one did not have one
second one had said something else other than the thesis statement
third was good
supported their thesis
revise and edit even if you are positive with your work.

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they have examples and giving out about one thing and well they told stuff but it didnt went to go in both

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they have examples and giving out about one thing and well they told stuff but it didnt went to go in both

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1. number one essays are when the person doesn't add a strong or understandable thesis
2. when they have a strong thesis but no example or weak example
3. strong thesis an example but its weak not much explanation or the conclusion doesn't go with the thesis
4. when the person has a strong thesis and a strong example or examples and the conclusion goes with the  thesis

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1)The essays each had something missing like for example 1 was missing a thesis and
2)One didnt have one and 2 had a good thesis and the third one had a weak thesis
3)Essay 2 had a good example that supported the thesis and the others had jumbled up examples
4)I think they should all try to connect their thesis and examples together more better.

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1) The essays varied in quality. Some had a good thesis and others had no thesis. Also, some had a very clear example while others had no example.
2) The thesis statements were either really strong and clear or really weak.
3)  They developed their examples by seeing what the prompt was about and finding something that matched it.
4) I would recommend revising and editing to make sure everything is precise.

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1) some have no thesis some do
2) one didn't have one, second didn't support it, and the third one was great
3)supported their thesis
4)practice makes perfect

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1. Each essay either has an a good example, no thesis, or a very weak example that doesn't connect with the prompt.
2. the first essay had no thesis the second one didn't have a good example and the third one had a good thesis.
3. they tired to find an example that connects with their thesis.
4. use a graphic organizer or something like that for them to see if everything looks clear.

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#1-the stories show good thesis bad ones good examples and bad thesis 

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#1-the stories show good thesis bad ones good examples and bad thesis 

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#2-The first on didnt have one the second had a good thesis but didnt back it up the 3rd one was good
#3-they took their thesis and found things that connects to example
#4-too make everything clear dont rush

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#1- one of the writers had a good thesis and example but another example had none of both.
#2- each thesis statement was unique though one of the essays didn't have one.
#3-  a couple of the essays stated many examples and one had a clear example that fit the prompt.
#4- I would plan out my essay first so i know that I have all the components to at least make a three on my essay.

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 1) The first one did not have a thesis statement, the 2nd one had a good example , and the 3rd one had a good thesis but not a strong example. 

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 1) The first one did not have a thesis statement, the 2nd one had a good example , and the 3rd one had a good thesis but not a strong example. 

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2) The 1st one had no thesis at all.  The 2nd one explained why taking risk is important but didn't have a because (example Why is taking risk important?= Answer which is > Taking risk are important because they are important to a person's success) instead of Taking risks is important to people's success. The 3rd thesis statement is good it explains in the story due to the thesis statement that taking a chance when a problem comes up is not a bad idea because you never know what will happen and you could learn from your mistakes.

3) 1 developed the example by showing how michael jordan took a chance trying out for the basketball team and made something of himself because he took a chance. 2 developed the example by explaining how Benjamin Franklin took a risk and how he developed lamps because sometimes risk taking is a good idea . 3 developed the example by having just a good thesis and letting the reader know that taking a chance is not always a bad idea.

4) Writer 1) You need to make sure next time you have a thesis statement, because you would've had a higher score you did a great job on the example tho.
Writer 2) You did a great job on everything and just keep up the great work.
Writer 3) You did a great job on your thesis statement, but your example was not as strong if your example was strong you would've made a three instead of a two.

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#1 had a kind of good thesis but not so much of a good example.

#2 a great thesis with good sentences and great examples.

#3 weak thesis it wasnt good at using examples. It developed over the risk, choices. Too much information that wasnt needed.

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#1- they had a good thesis statement but not not an example.
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Essay #1
The author asked questions and answered using his example. - The thesis was strong.- They developed the example by showing the causes and effects of them. -Make your indention's to start a paragraph more clear.
Essay #2
The thesis was good.- They developed and example by looking at a famous person who made an impact.- I would say you did a good job and just to check the way you put words together.
Essay #3
The thesis was weak and there wasn't a specific example they focused on.- He didn't connect the many examples to his weak thesis.-  focus more on setting the base to your story by your thesis and finding a better example.

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ESSAY # 1
- Strong thesis but lacked explanation in its example
- developed examples through telling the cause and effect of why chances are difficult and important
- Be careful on picking your examples

ESSAY # 2
- Strong thesis with good examples + power sentence to emphasize the message
-  developed example through defining what taking chances are by a person who made great impact.

ESSAY # 3
- weak thesis that made the example all over the place.
(no concise example)
- author had a difficult time telling the readers the relationship between its examples and its thesis.
- Know the differences between a thesis, extra info and etc.

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#1 essay does not have a thesis statement , poor handwriting, and  incompetently organized. Even through the writer has the concrete example
#2 essay have successfully fulfill all of the requirement to make a 3 : good and straight to the point thesis, strong and specific example and a power sentence to connect his/her example to the thesis
#3 essay's structure is different to the we that we were taught : the thesis in the conclusion instead of the introduction,  and the writer did not include a concrete example

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1) #3 didn't have an example, #1 connected the thesis to real world examples, #2 used mainly a historical example to enforce how you can use the thesis to improve your life

2) #1 had a poor thesis when compared to the others, while #3 correctly assessed the essay and wrote a thesis that helped the structure of the whole essay, #2 was fine, strong thesis but weak in other areas

3) #1 used a real-world example to enforce how not following the thesis will cause you problems in life, #2 used a historical example to show how the theses has provided good for others, #3 didn't have a example

4) #1 should improve there thesis to follow their example more precisely while trimming the example to one key point, also they should put a power sentace
#2 No improvement is needed, #3 work on a power sentence and put in a power sentence to improve the  essay

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1. The essay was weak and didn't have a strong thesis.
2. He got everything and had a strong thesis and good example.
3. Had a good thesis and lacked a good example.

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1. he had a good thesis but his example was very weak they should have farther supported the example.
2. he got everything

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1 - The whole essay was very weak and there was no concrete thesis statement.
2 - This essay was really good, they had a strong thesis, example, and power sentence.
3 - The third writer had a good these but didn't have a concrete example.

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the first essay was horrible with no real thesis and no examples, the second essay was actually better with more in thought examples and the last essay was just like the first one but with better thoughtful examples

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1-It was very weak reagrding the whole essay, especially the thesis.
2- the second writer has a strong thesis and example
3- the third writer had a strong thesis but lacked a good example

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(1) the writers used different strategies (2) their thesis statements were different on essay 3 the thesis statement is really weak and was not concrete (3) they developed their examples by answering and supporting their thesis statement (4) i would advice them on working on developing their examples because most didn't support the thesis statement and in essay 3 didn't had an example

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essay 2-3 hd a thsis while 1 didn't

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essay 2-3 had a thesis but essay 1 does not have one

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The first essay did not have a thesis while the other two did.

The first two had an example while the last did not.

Only the second had a power sentence.

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1: the first essay only had an example. thes second essay had a thesis statement and an example with a power sentence inside. the last essay had a thesis statement but no example
2: they didnt have ‘because’ in them
3: the first and second essay had examples that was related to the prompt
4: your thesis statement is crucial in the essay because it is the one short sentence that summarizes your essay

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1)The first one had no thesis statement, but had a good example.The second writer had a thesis statement, a good example, and a good power sentence.The third writer had a good thesis statement, but had no concrete example.
2)The first writer's didn't even have a thesis statement. The second writer's thesis statement was short, but to the point.And the third writer's thesis statement was more wordy, but listed benefits.
3)The first writer's writing didn't have a good example and it was all over the place, and didn't have a thesis to connect with.The second writer's example  connected with the thesis statement and helped back it up.The third writer's didn't even have a concrete example, but had a good thesis statement.
4)I would tell them to have a good thesis before coming up with an example, so you can make your example  relate to the thesis.

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1) The first writer did not have a thesis, but the second and third writers had a thesis. Also, the first and second writers had a concrete example, but the third writer did not. Additionally, the second writer had a power sentence.
2) They didn't use 'because' but they still had a  thesis statement.
3) The first and second writers thought of an example that related to the prompt. The third did not have an example.
4) You should always have a strong thesis statement and an example that relates to the prompt.

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1. The first writer didnt have a thesis statement but did have a good example. Plus, it wasnt in essay format
2. The second writer had a trifecta, thesis statement, power statement and a concrete example
3. The third writer had a thesis statement and power sentence but did not have a good example so the essay wasn't very specific

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1) The First writer did not have a strong esssay with many issues in their writing. The second writer had a strong essay with a thesis statement and example.
2) That some did not follow through with the way that anessay is usually taught. Therefore, it effected the outcome of their essay.
3)

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1. The first writer didn't have thesis statement and that is a no no. The second writer had a thesis statement, example, and power sentence so that was good. The third writer had a thesis statement and a power sentence, but didn't have an example so it was just a very broad piece

2. I notice that the first writer didn't have a thesis statement at all. The second writer had a short thesis statement but it was straight to the point. The third writer had a lengthy thesis statement, but it did get the point across.

3. I think all of their examples somewhat connected to the prompt.

4. My advice would be to just check that they have the must haves for a good essay.

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1) They have a different form of writing and they have different ways they introduce their story.
2) The writer's thesis statement wasn't how you normally write it.
3) They develop their example by building up to it by using sentences to tie the example and they essay to the story.
4)Advice I have is that they should do a story plan and make sure that everything marches and connects.

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1. The second writer was strong with their thesis and example and the first was weak with on their example
2. They didnt use the word because like we usually do but they still had a thesis
3. If you have a concrete example then you will get a higher score
4. Make sure you have a thesis statement that connects to the example and a power sentence that also connects to the example and thesis

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1. The first writer doesn't have a concrete example or thesis while the second has both.
2. The writers thesis statements didn't have a because reasoning.
3. They developed their examples by connecting the prompt to the example.
4. They should keep in mind the 3 non negotiables.

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1) One of the writers had a thesis, concrete example, and a power sentence. Differently, some had only a thesis or none. 2) Some were written in a different format than what we were taught. 3) Some thouroughly explained their example and related it back to the thesis. Some had no concrete example or didn’t develop their examples as well or they didn’t have one at all. 4) Focus on choosing a thesis statement and build on it with details and a concrete example. After that, relate it back to the thesis with a power sentence.

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1) They did not all have a power sentence.
2) Some of the writers wrote their thesis statement in a different form than we were taught.
3) One of the writers did not give a strong example, but rather a topic. And some did not go into complete detail about their example.
4) I advise the writers to always make sure you have a strong thesis, example, and power sentence before they submit it to ensure you get the best score possible.

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1)one of the writers thesis statements were in the middle of the essay
2)They were straight to the point and doesnt have to be in the beginning of essay
3) they connected throughout the essay and explained how it connects to the thesis
4) Make sure you have a concrete example and connect it to the thesis statement and the rest of the essay

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1. the writers of essay 2 ha a power sentence that combined

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1. The second writer was strong when writing their example and thesis while the first and third writers were weak on making their point across.
2.As long as your thesis is clear and connects to the prompt you'll get a good score.
3. the more clear the example is the more it pushes you to a higher score.
4. stick with a good simple thesis statement and make sure the example connects with it.

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1. The Writers 1&3 Did Not Provide A Concrete Example, While 2 Had A Strong Thesis, A Concrete Example, And A Good Power Sentence.
2. Thesis Statements 1&2 Was Not Clear And Concise, And Was Not Supported Well.
3. Essay 2 Had Most Details Pertain To Their Thesis Statement And Supported The Thesis Statement
4. I Suggest Thinking Of Your Example Before Developing A Thesis Statement.

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1. One of the writers has a power sentence, thesis, and example. The other just had a thesis. While the other had nothing.
2. The more specific the thesis, the better the score.
3. The ones with the more specific examples clearly explained their example while the others had their example everywhere, with no specific area.
4. Find a example or choose the one that will give the most information for your body instead of using all of them.

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1) The first and third writers failed to include a thesis, power statement, or an example, while the second one had all three.
2) They all included the benefits of taking risks, but the first and third writers provided a weak thesis.
3) The first one developed no example. The second essay gave a thesis, explained their essay, and then connected them.
4) I advise the first and third writers to learn how to better explain their ideas via writing.