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Which scenes make good/best use of dialogue, why is it effective?

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Which scenes make good/best use of dialogue, why is it effective?

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Hero - Thomas Jackson
Antagonist - Carlos Clown

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Bolton International Film Festival - FilmFreeway

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Intention - Venna plans to go out with her friends, living her own life.
Obstacle - Venna and her brother become a part of their parents troubled past when a strange figure comes to haunt them, changing their lives forever.

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Intention - Purl wants to be a friend and fellow member to the team she is a part of at work.
Obstacle - The other employees don't want her to be a part of the team because of how different she is.

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Intention - The mum gets her disabled son a three-legged dog so that he doesn't feel alone and can have a friend.
Obstacle - Her son doesn't like the dog because of it's disability.

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An Animated Story of a boy who hates his disabled dog

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Intention - Pip goes in to train to be a guide dog for the blind.
Obstacle - She is clumsy and the other dogs don't like her so she struggles with the training.

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They're clear on what they're saying, confident, explain their company in a simple but understandable way. They involve the judges, showing examples of what their company offers and are confident and give clear responses to the judges questions.

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Best Pitch Ever!  Mainstage Travel Dragon's Den Series 11 Episode 7

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They're not confident in their idea once the judges ask questions, pauses in responses and generally don't have full confidence in the idea. Confusing the judges with not telling them important information straight away.

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Partnership on the rocks after "shambles" pitch is torn apart by Dragons | Dragons' Den

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Robert and Emma's living room.

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Location Recce Robert and Emma's living room

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Robert and Emma's living room

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Robert and Emma's kitchen.

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Location Recce Robert and Emma's kitchen

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Robert and Emma's Kitchen

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Park - Josh and Emma's meeting place.

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Park - Josh and Emma's meeting place.

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Field - Robert and Emma's picnic spot.

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Field - Robert and Emma's picnic spot.

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Josh and Emma's Flat.

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Josh and Emma's Flat

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For Park and Flat

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For Countryside

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For Robert and Emma's house

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23rd

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24th

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26th

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Idea generation was easy for me, as months before starting FMP I wanted to film Betrayal, but had no idea when to. So soon as FMP came along, I knew Betrayal would be great for it as I'm passionate about the idea.

I did have two other ideas, one a horror film about the Sandman, and the other an action comedy about a hitman who hates killing people and gets sick every time he does.

Choosing the idea I was going to make was easy, although the horror and action-comedy shorts did interest me, I was no way as passionate about those as I was with Betrayal. So I knew straight away that I wanted to go through and make Betrayal.

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Writing up the context itself for the pitch was pretty easy for me. With a bit of help from Katherine about what to cover in the pitch, I was able to bring together a strong PowerPoint presentation including everything to do with Betrayal, from plot, characters and message to music, visuals and timings. I also made sure all of these points had something to do with either the audience or fit to the film festivals requirements.

Actually pitching the idea is what I worried about as I get very anxious talking in front of a group of people and I feared my mind would just go blank and I wouldn't have anything to say. But I wanted to do well for the film. So, after I finished making the presentation, I spend 3 times a day going through what I would say, as I didn't want to take in cue cards, knowing I would spend more time looking down at a piece of paper than actually talking to people, so I went through it a lot so I would know what to say off-by-heart.

The day it came to pitching the idea I was still very nervous, so I went through my pitch a few times to keep everything in my head. Just before my pitch I tried to stay as positive as possible, and went around talking to people in the class to keep that attitude.

Even though during my pitch I was still anxious, I feel like I hid it very well. Out of all the other times I did presentations in front of the class, I believe that pitch was the best thing I've done. In past presentations I rushed a lot as I wanted to get it over and done with, but for the pitch I just tried to stay calm and I took my time on each point, saying everything I could for the film.

My pitch did go better than I expected so I think I knew I was going to get a distinction, although I was still worried that how I pitched it wasn't as good as the information in the pitch itself and would possibly bring me down a grade, which made me happy to find out that it didn't.

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When writing the first draft script, I hadn't done character profiles and the only character I knew a lot about was Robert, with him being my favourite character. With not knowing much about the other characters, I did depend on the play a lot to get an idea on what the characters would say to each other. This however didn't help bring the characters personalities to life. After feedback on how to make the plot and the characters personalities and goals in the film, I went on to write character profiles before starting the second draft.

The 2nd and 3rd draft were already a lot better than the first. From the character profiles it made it a lot easier to know how characters would talk and respond to situations. The 3rd draft was when I reordered the script scenes, most of the script is in reverse, but I put in the most important scenes first so the audience won't be confused. So I made sure the scenes that showed Robert's sociopath personality came in early on, as well as mention to his and Emma's son, as well as make it clear straight away everyone's relationship to one another.

I told a lot of feedback and advice into consideration when it came to the final draft. Firstly, the idea of having the plot in a loop, so the beginning was also at the end so that audience's know that's the whole story, I really liked the idea and added it in, as its something very different from the original play. I got feedback on Josh's reaction to Emma being pregnant, as his response was too casual and it didn't reflect his personality or feelings towards Emma at all. I decided to take the advice of using actions instead of dialogue for Josh in the scene as I believe it reflected his character better. I also took advice on when the affair is revealed between Emma and Robert. As in other scenes, Emma makes it clear that she doesn't want Robert to find out, so doesn't make sense that she just blurts it out. So instead I took the advice of Emma acting uncomfortable when Robert asks Emma questions about the letter, and then Robert reveals to Emma that he knows. It fits a lot better with the characters and I like the idea a lot, again making it different from the play.

The main thing I worried about with the script is how long it was, the first draft was 18 pages when the film can't be any longer than 15 minutes. What helped me solve the problem was by listing out what is important and what the audience learns in each scene. From there, the scene between Robert and Josh was taken out, as the audience already has an understanding of their relationship even without this scene.

Even though it took a lot of drafts to get the final draft, it was definitely worth it as I am very proud of my Betrayal script and I believe it's the best script I've written yet.

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With how many times I've done pre-production, it felt like an easy routine going through it all and making it. However, I knew from past experience that with long shot lists, I got easily confused while directing on what shots were going to be filmed. So to ensure that won't happen, I made 3 separate shot lists for each filming day and included everything I possibly could in order to make it easier for me when filming.

For a while we, as a crew, was struggling on two locations. All the other location recces were down easily as the locations had been used before so it was only a few details on the paperwork that had to be changed. But, we were struggling on a location for the flat and for Josh's house. We were supposed to be using a friends house for the flat, as her living room was on the second floor so it looked like a flat which was perfect, however it was made unavailable short notice. Finding a house location for Josh was cut, after the scene which included that location was cut, so that ended that problem. And then co-producer, Kelsey shortly after found another location for the flat.

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Day 1: Yesterday's filming didn't go as well as I hoped. In the first scene we didn't have our DP, so I was left to work on the camera, which is never a good idea. It then took longer to get to our second location than I expected so we were a little behind schedule. In terms of the actors, they both did perfectly and their performances of Emma and Josh were as I envisioned. We were down on a few props but we managed to improvise quite well. Really, soon as we got to the second location, I knew things weren't going to go as planned, we had 3 hours to do 3 scenes and between those scenes the actors had to have outfit changes and Kelsey and I had to change up the location a bit and go through shots. Ultimately, I knew things were going to be rushed. Looking back at the footage, all though all the shots are good (expect for the ones I did, of course, a few of the takes are over-exposed), almost through all the takes, you can hear static from the mic. We took quite a few takes, so hopefully we have enough to cut between shots so there's no static in any of the audio when edited.

Day 2: Filming today went a lot better. Although it was very windy and the weather kept switching between cloudy and sunny, the day went well. As Kelsey set up for shots, I went through the script with Ben and Dory and they did several read-throughs. I talked with Dory about how Emma would feel when Robert asks her about the letter from Josh, and I talked to Ben about Robert's sociopath behaviour. They both captured the characters very well and very happy Ben did my favourite character justice. Also, after knowing what the audio was like from yesterday, I ensured that we did more than 3 takes for each shot, so that we have more footage and audio to work from in editing.

Day 3: Today's filming went very well, even though we didn't start filming until 12 because the DP and script-supervisor was late, I still kept the production day going and did several read-throughs with the actors. I kept to the same routine as Sunday, I did a lot of takes in case the audio messes up again. I did a lot of talking with the actors about how their characters behaviours are around each other, especially when it's all three of them in a scene. The actors took everything on board very well, they even added little bits to their characters which added their own personal touch, which I liked as it let them explore their characters. Definitely think todays filming was the best of the three days.

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Film Submitted

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Film Independent Future Filmmakers - FilmFreeway

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Film Submitted

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SA.FI.TER. PUGLIA ON THE ROAD - FilmFreeway

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From the 3 film festivals I chose, the overall brief from them was to submit a short film that is 15 minutes or less that is of the drama genre and is made by UK/international pre-university students with appropriate copyright clearances with music etc. Betrayal fits to this brief as it is under 15 minutes, it is a drama about the characters relationships. Us as filmmakers are pre-university students in the UK and have used appropriate copyright clearances with copyright free music and crediting the artist.

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With there being sound issues during filming, I made sure while logging the footage, in which takes there was issues and where. I also added in logging where there was acting issues, camera issues, good takes and moments and the locations and situations. I did forget to add the take numbers and scenes which I will remember to do next time but I still managed to navigate all the takes with the locations in the descriptions.

I didn't put the footage into a first edit straight away. I first put the scenes into individual edits to ensure that all of them work well with the audio problems we had, which most of them did. From there, I then put all the scenes in the correct order and added a simple scene card between each scene. I then added the music which really helped bring the film together as an emotional drama piece. After having feedback on the first edit, the main thing I needed to change was the scene cards, as well as some audio levelling and a bit of colour grading. I knew for the scene cards that a calendar-type animation would be good to show the audience the change in years. I was aided in coming up with the idea for the final scene card and how to make it because I never really used After Effects but from there I kinda got the hang of it and made up the scene card animations. After adding in the new scene cards, fixing the audio levels and fading bits of audio into each other so you don't hear the edit cut and a bit of colour grading, I was happy with the edit and exported it.

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Strengths - Directing, my communication with actors has improved and with being passionate about the film, I went through the characters a lot with the actors way before filming started so that by the time we did film, the actors knew exactly how their characters would respond in the situations. Communication with DP, Kelsey, has also improved. I too went through the shots a lot with her before filming and explained how I wanted each shot I wanted, so during filming I just had to say the name of the shot and it quickly got set up and I didn't have to change anything myself.

Weaknesses - I think most of my weaknesses were internal. We did have issues with finding days to film at the start and I struggled a bit to figure out when filming would be available but I did manage to get it sorted. However, when I am in that kind of situation I do get easily stressed, which then makes it harder to figure things out. So I need to try to improve on keeping things under control and staying calm in a producers standpoint.

Opportunities - Cast. It's only in recent productions that I've been working with actors. Working with actors has given me the opportunity to write more complex characters in my scripts and to have several characters who can audition for the roles. I know 5 actors, but they are friends with a lot of other actors, so with knowing them it also gives me the opportunity to work with new actors. Betrayal is the first film I've worked on with professional actors, so it's given me the opportunity to know what it's like to direct a short film with actors and the overall set environment.

Threats - Time and weather. The first day of filming, time was a big threat, it was a long work to set and the actors were tired and we had 3 scenes to film so I felt the threat of time to get everything done quickly so that the actors wouldn't get fed up and we would finish on time. The second day of filming, weather was a threat with the wind, we ended up having to go to a different area of our set so the wind wasn't so loud.