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I come from a family of so many creative souls. Members of my family are artists, musicians, writers, singers, and so much more. Due to this, I have always been inclined to create as that is much of what I have witnessed growing up. I always feel impacted by my family whenever I work on my own art.

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The decision I made to pursue being an artist full time was made due to fine arts educators I have had in my life. My high school theater directors impacted me more than I ever thought was possible, but I have realized over and over again that I would not be where I am (and even possibly not doing theater at all) had I not met and worked with them.

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In the work that I do presently and will continue to do, I always want my culture and blackness to show. My Blackness is who I am, and I care to showcase it through my art. Not just to prove a point, but to be able to encourage others who look like me. A value of mine will always be uplifting and telling black stories.

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As a Black person, I continuously am seeing the works of the white figures in theater history. However, my mind and body will always be more impacted by the works of those who look like me. It's important for me to be able to see works of those who experienced things like I do, who have been discriminated against, and have had to fight due to their black and brown skin.

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Whenever I tell people that I am a BA Theatre and Dance major, I'm always asked "what are you going to do with that?" Everything. I'm going to perform, I'm going to write, I'm going to do every technical aspect. I will be a well-rounded individual with experience in every area. I refuse to allow myself to only know one thing.

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A goal I have for the work I continue to do, is to have an impact on others. On people who look like me, people who have been afraid to speak, or just people. I admire people who have impacted others with their work and led them to do something positive. That's what I want to do. What I will do. I will be a platform and light for others to look up to.

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Currently, as a student at a huge university, there are many other students who I can look at for inspiration, assistance, or just companionship. At this time of my life where I am now branching into the real world and the start of my career, this is so important. I want to work on being present with them. Any of these students can help me just a little, and I hope I can do the same for them.

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Time flies. We always hear that. I hear it nearly every day. I need to continue working on staying in the moment and using the present to create my ideas, as there is no better time than now. Reminding myself of how time can just rush by assists in keeping me from procrastinating my art, and continuously pushing towards it.

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I am a huge believer in everyone having limits and boundaries that people should not cross. I have my personal ones that I have been getting better at establishing, especially in my creative work environments. No one can put out their best artwork if their needs and limits are not being heard. Limits are something I will always honor and value.

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As a Black person, I have felt the need to be quiet for majority of my life. Whether it be about my issues, my ideas, or anything, I have rarely felt like I had the ability to speak in my life. This i especially true in the world of art and performance. The constant fear I have of my ideas not being accepted, or that speaking about my opinions on how my people are portrayed in various forms of media have held me back. But that is not something I can continue to do.

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I am someone who believes in affirmations. This one directly relates to the idea of being present and goes against the idea that the present is something to be scared of.

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Though this is literally just writing, it reminds me of myself. I write myself notes and reminders on sticky notes, which I then put up in my room. This is so I can look at them and be reminded of the important things.

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Pipeline by Dominique Morisseau is the first show I have been in that was written by a Black playwright. My senior year of high school. It took so long. This play will always have a special place in my heart.

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"Black is Beautiful", and that includes our artwork.

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When I saw this, I just felt a sort of connection. Like, in terms of theater, there is not a specific dream job for me. As long as I'm working in the theater environment, it's a dream job. SImple as that.

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This movie, along with Get Out, inspired so many black artists. Jordan Peele has become an inspiration for many Black artists, and I want to be the same way for others.

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This article is one that I related to heavily to when reading, the journey to appreciating my culture and background. On the journey to loving my Blackness, I found the courage to include it in my art.

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​It's done. It only took six hours, but it was worth it. My new long braids really do look beautiful. A lot better than I thought it would, to be honest. I never would've thought that I would do it, fifteen-year-old me would be so shocked. But that was the misguided-me, the self-hating-me, the bend-over-backwards-for-white-people me. And that girl died a long time ago.

I grew up in Apex, North Carolina, probably the whitest place on earth. It's probably the exact definition of suburban America, if I'm not mistaken ( click here if you don't believe me). I was surrounded by whiteness everywhere. There was no diversity at all in this small country town. It affected me so much that I began to idolize them; I worshiped their fair skin and softer hair and despised my own. Once, when I was just about eight years old, I dared uttered the words "I wish I was white." My mother had a fit, but it didn't change anything.

Soon I started to view my skin as a burden more than a beauty. I did everything I could to loosen the ties to my identity. So when people said I was black I'd correct them and say I was Ethiopian, as if the KKK would be able to tell the difference. My apprehension seemed to be rewarded with praise. People would tell me I'm pretty for a black girl or that "I don't talk like them " (to this day I'm still not sure who "them" is). As more and more people said these things, the more and more I came to appreciate it, not only that but I became proud of it.

​Now, I know I'm not the only one with this type of story, I've come to know a lot of people especially those who are African/biracial that did what I did. It's almost like a defense mechanism; blacks are constantly being put down and misrepresented so we try to do everything we can to not become victims of that hate. I find this even more prevalent in the Ethiopian community; I know plenty of kids that I watched grow up say things like "I'm not black, I'm Ethiopian" or they say things like "blacks are lazy" just to uplift themselves.​It wasn't until recently that I realized my entire southern life has been filled with racism and discrimination, and that I've been white-washed to believe otherwise. Once I realized the plight of the modern black women, I started to be more vocal about it. I voiced my concerns about the current system and the racism that's intertwined with it. Then I started to dig deep into my own identity. I learned about the parts of black history that they don't teach in schools. I started listening to more pro-black music and watched more pro-black movies. Through this insight I felt more liberated. I stopped damaging my hair and went natural. Through this I started to feel more at peace with myself like I wasn't living a lie anymore. That's what happens when you become woke; you're more you.

Now I could stand here and criticize this practice, but what really interests me about this problem is how badly we want to separate ourselves from being black. Why is it that from such a young age, we learn that blackness is something to be ashamed of? Not only that, but we must do everything in our power to hide our blackness by assimilating to what white people find "acceptable".

It took me a while to realize how messed up that is. But evidently I did. The inconsistencies and the fallacies began to add up. So much so that it seemed illogical to hate myself for wearing the beautiful ebony armor that I've been gifted with. I grew to learn how beautiful my blackness is, and how the complexion of my skin and the curls in my hair were so unique that it should be celebrated instead of put down. I grew to understand our complex history and I started to truly appreciate black culture. I fell in love with the music, the style, the art, and the hair we can never leave out the hair.
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Photo Courtesy of Lidia Abraha

Words cannot even begin to describe how relieved I felt once I started to embrace my blackness. For once, I felt like my body was my own; a temple that's been defaced, burnt to the ground, and scared, but my own nonetheless.

I finally feel like I have control over my identity, and I can embrace every inch of my blackness and femininity without seeking approval from anybody.

Every black person has their own journey to loving their blackness. But the journey is much more unique for black women. For some reason, there's this hammering pressure for black women to conform to eurocentric standards of beauty, and a pressure to act a certain way that brings comfort to white people. Despite us knowing that the pressure's there, and how dangerous it is, we still conform to it. And that, will never cease to amaze me.

I, too, am victim to the self-hate perpetuated by images in media and a lack of strong black female role models in my life. But I will not let that stop me from loving myself and every inch of my blackness. Because being black is TRULY a blessing; I just wished I had realized it sooner.

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​It's done. It only took six hours, but it was worth it. My new long braids really do look beautiful. A lot better than I thought it would, to be honest. I never would've thought that I would...

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A sentence I wish I had heard a lot earlier than I did. Luckily, people have begun to let me know that this is true. It's helped me immensely.

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This image kind of is like my family and the educators I have had. They have helped build the ladder for me to climb to success, and it is still in the midst of being built. They are still continuously supporting me.

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This image is sometimes how I feel when I make art that is true to myself. It feels like I can feel the presence of my family and ancestors, almost as if they are guiding me in telling stories.