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If you really knew me, you would know that I have been blessed with a diverse host of top flight mentors/teachers. As a young child, my mother was my first mentor/teacher. She taught me how to think critically. She was into the Law of Attraction/Positive Affirmations/Scientific Prayer/Thinking Things Into Existence. As I have matured I have come to fully appreciate what an amazing blessing it was to be taught how to think critically about not just my actions, but my words and more importantly my thoughts while still a child. During my college years, I was taught my oral history by the great Aztec-Mexica philosopher and oral historian El Maestro Andres Segura of Tenochtitlan/Mexico City. Not a lot of folk have been blessed to know the truth of their oral history by one of the greats like I have. In graduate school, the intellectual global icon Cornel West was my advisor. Many admire C.West, but only a few have had the opportunity to learn so closely from such a treasure. There have been many other great teachers and mentors in my life and career including Robert Logan. To be blessed with so many world-class teachers/mentors both humbles me and drives me to want to help others by both teaching/mentoring and connecting others with great teachers/mentors.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I struggled with defining my culture because I don't feel I have one, necessarily. If you really knew me, you would know that I have been striving to make a place for myself in this world as a woman without a husband or children, which isn't somewhere I ever thought I'd be. If you really knew me, you'd know that I struggle with feeling like I am an imposter and am smart enough to be amongst you all.

If you really knew me, you would know that I often speak before I think and that's how I process, which is something I am working on. I am not trying to commit microaggressions and may realize them AFTER I have said them out loud, which may be harmful to others and which I hate. If you really knew me, you would know that I have gotten so much out of this work and I am not going to stop trying to be better and more mindful on all fronts.

If you really knew me, you'd know how grateful I am to work for an organization that's actually doing this work with their employees, and I am not going to take that for granted.

If you really knew me, you'd know how much I care about other human beings, truly, and how much it matters that I am working every day on being a better one.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I am not driven by recognition/accolades but purpose.  I strive to make each interaction with anyone purposeful.  My personal growth is enhanced by interactions with others and refelcting on the lessons learned.

If you really knew me you would know that I lived a pretty sheltered life from the trauma that growing up in the South (Mis could give with regards to racism but I am not oblivious to it.

The DEI work has really broadened my thoughts on microagressions and provided an awareness on my interactions with others as well as increased my ability to recognize them when on the receiving end.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I care very much about others and also about others’ perceptions of me. I love to be helpful and I am terrified of doing less than my best or less than is expected in any situation. Being a part of this group and of the DEI work has helped me reflect on the importance of authenticity and to value the open conversation that is provided in our teams and our spaces. Thinking specifically about micro aggressions, I can personally be better about guarding my fear of being wrong or making mistakes in order to fully open myself to learning and awareness.

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If you really knew me, you would know that while being raised in rural, eastern N.C. on a tobacco farm I learned the importance of hard work, family and supporting one's community. Education was the "equalizer" for me.

If you really knew me, you would know that I have learned alot about myself and our organization throughout our DEI journey.

If you really knew me, you would know that I have grown personally in knowing more about microagressions and the importance in "calling it out" when it is observed. The DEI training has allowed me the opportunity to examine my own perceptions.  I have learned the importance of being an ally and demonstrating empathy in circumstances and supporting our team members.

If you really knew me, you would know that one of the most powerful sessions for me was the, "danger of a single story". I believe these are the type of topics  we need to continuously discuss so we "do not rob people of their dignity and emphasize how we are different rather than how we are similiar".

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If you really knew me,  you would know that I often care for and watch out for everyone else around me and not do the same for myself. I am trying to practice putting my own oxygen mask on, but it is really hard for me.

If you really knew me, you would know I am not good at making small talk, not comfortable in groups where I don't know many people, especially talking about personal things.

As a result of participating in DEI, I have really learned to listen more and I am practicing speaking less. I am learning how to advocate for myself and others, to not be silent and also step out of my comfort zone. I have learned I must have conversations with my children, family and friends that I did not have growing up.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I never want to hurt other people in what I say or what I do and as a result I often choose to say nothing when it comes to discussing tough topics or sharing about myself.  Through the DEI work I have come to realize how important it is for me to speak, share, and trust that my team will support me and help me to understand if I say or do something wrong.  I have learned how important it is to hear all different stories and perspectives.  I appreciate the time that we have had and continue to spend learning about each other, making connections, and learning from each other.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I am extremely intentional about building relationship and putting people first, and I am not ever intentionally trying to cause hurt or malaise to anyone.

If you really knew me, you would know that I do not like to be the center of attention and an introvert at heart, and I am not trying to bypass conversations or avoid social interactions.  I am just not comfortable in them.

If you really knew me, you would know that I give everything my all and often do not feel that it is enough - I give grace upon grace to others but do not extend that same thing to myself.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I spent my youth struggling in poverty, dealing with an alcoholic father, and hiding the worst of it from my peers. It wasn't until my 30s that I felt secure enough to share the details with others, that I knew I didn't need to be ashamed of either struggle, and that I could be proud of breaking the cycle and accomplishing all that I have. I am not unsociable but rather very much an introvert. I need my alone time to decompress, reflect and gather thoughts for the next day. I am not avoiding group dinners or team bonding; I simply need the silent time as desperately as I need water.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I would never say or do anything to cause hurt, discomfort, or embarrassment to someone. As we have discussed microaggressions, I have found myself reflecting on times when I have done just that, and I am committed to being more aware of and sensitive to my words and behaviors. If you really knew me, you would know that I believe in the power of relationships and that the ability to connect with each other enhances our lives and improves our work. During our DEI work, I found that I share many similarities with others in our organization that I didn’t know of before our DEI work. That has reinforced my belief that we are all so much more alike in our human connections than different and that no matter how we appear to others on the outside, likely we have experienced (and may currently be experiencing) painful situations that have shaped us. In addition to our similarities, we also have unique differences, culturally and experientially. How wonderful when we can discuss those differences, celebrate each other, and honor our diversity.

As an organization we have Core Values that should be reflected in our practices.  As my friend Patrick often quotes from Maya Angelou, ‘Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better’. As an organization, our DEI work has helped us know better, so together let’s make sure we do better.

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If you really knew me you would know that I never really feel like I fit in. I am surprised and humbled to be with an amazing team at AVID, but not sure that my contributions are ever really enough.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I worry about a lot of things.  I am sometimes insecure and always working on ways to support employees and others.  I perceive myself to be kind at the same time that I recognize that others may see me as the CEO not as the listener that I strive to be.  I can appear confident because, people count on me for that strength.  I want others to know that I count on you as well.  I count on you to tell me how you feel and share your feelings and thoughts with genuine intent.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I am someone who is an even tempered person. I don't get overly excited about anything and I also don't get upset very easily. I take things as pretty standard, normal everyday life. I am very genuine with people and consider everyone my equal, no matter what status in life, what color they are or why they are different than me. We are all human and are all put on this earth as equals. I am not a person that will be the first to reach out to someone or make an effort to get to know someone, to me these should just be a natural meeting.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I struggled with my identity until late in my 30's, mostly because I was always surrounded by people or family who would remind me not to tell anyone about my partner because people would either judge or because it wasn't "normal."  I was very insecure in my 20s, you wouldn't know it though because I learned to code-switch really well so that I could fit in with what everyone wanted me to be.  I can say I tried to become all things to all people, but it wasn't until a very difficult experience in my late 30s that I had to confront my deepest insecurity and shame that I had been carrying around for so long that I finally learned to love myself completely and be comfortable in my own skin.  I call that my born-again moment, that truly brought me to my knees, and when I truly started having a relationship with Jesus.  Thanks to the Lord, I am super joyful now inside and out.  If you really knew me, you would know that I am a big believer in empowering others and capitalizing on everyone's strengths because I understand the power in recognizing what's valuable in each and every one of us, and I am not someone who is driven by ego, nor power nor money, I truly strive to be driven by the Holy Spirit and the walk Jesus intended for all of us.  If you really knew me, you would know  that I highly value communication and that I do not like it when people make assumptions, I am very much about having crucial conversations so that we all feel heard and valued.  If you really knew me, you would know that God comes first, then my family, then the world. :)  That does not mean I am going to try to convince you to have faith, but I will listen to you, respect you, and will joyfully have a conversation with you about the Lord if and when you're ready.  Just know that I will wear my faith loudly because who I am is all thanks to the Lord, so please don't think that it's because I am trying to force anything on you.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I am shy.  Many people choose not to believe this especially if they have seen me present.  If you really knew me, you would know that the person presenting is not me.  It is a character I assume or a place I go to become someone else.  I am not comfortable in social situations because I feel like I can never be myself.  I have been trained by our society to not be who I am.  This is changing (slowly), but as we say, “It’s gets better”.  Know it is not personal if I don’t want to hang out with you, go to dinner with you, or be your “friend”.  I’m very protective of who I let into my inner circle.  I have trust and control issues which affect how I interact with people.  Yes, I can fake it, but it causes great discomfort.  The perfect day for me is being alone and getting done what needs to be done.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I am someone who has worked very hard to get to where I am today. My sunny exterior is sometimes a front to cover my anxiety and my feelings of inferiority that stem from gowning up with a narcissistic and bipolar mother. You would know that my son suffers from the same mental health struggles. However, I am not someone who allows other people to dictate my happiness. I am learning to set boundaries and to maintain them.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I am what some might call "extra" but it is authentically who I am; I love to laugh, and do so loudly; My "extraness" and loud life cover deep rooted insecurities about not being good enough; I thrive in social situations and am 100% extrovert however because of that I also feel like I have to be "on" all the time and cannot have a bad day; I choose to find the good in situations because my anxiety manifests in focusing on the bad or the uncontrollable. If you really knew me you would know that I spent my formative years in a tiny town in Southwest Virginia where I learned the value of family and integrity and authenticity and hard work but because I wasn't born there I was always trying to fit in; If you really knew me, you would know that I genuinely love helping people become who they are supposed to be, showing them their talents and helping them hone them...I believe this is my calling. I will always do my level best to be honest because I was lied to for most of my life by the people who should have always had my best interests in mind. I am learning my place in this world, but am more comfortable in my own skin at 44 than I have ever been before, due to surrounding myself with amazing humans who want to be better and that feels good

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If you really knew me, you would know that I ________________________________, and I am not _____________________________.

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If you really knew me, you would know that I struggle with anxiety and abandonment that stem from things in my childhood; that I love to laugh and to watch comedy skits/movies/tv (although I am not an avid TV watcher); I absolutely dislike scary movies of any kind!; music is my muse and I have to listen to it every day - I literally know thousands of songs and lyrics as soon as the tune comes on; I am a loner and need time to myself to recharge, think and process - this is why I am not good at carpools (don't ask  - yes, I am driving separately)  - yes, I am not always on 1000 and I don't always want to be the center of attention - actually, I prefer the opposite - I like helping behind the scenes.; I process on my face a lot - give me time - I am making it have meaning to me and it is not always a response to you ( I am working on my poker face); I am a loyal person - once I got you - I got you & only you can impact that.  I am a woman of my word - it's my bond and I don't take the responsibility lightly.; I am NOT - defined by the things that HAPPENED to me.  I am so much more than the labels and categories I can be "boxed" into. I am NOT done learning and growing - so, be patient with me and when I make a mistake help me learn how to do it better or correctly the next time.