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to made the film seem more interesting
sound can affect the mood of the audience

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A/an/the:
https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/540/01/
http://esl.fis.edu/grammar/rules/article.htm

3rd person sing.:
https://en.islcollective.com/resources/printables/worksheets_doc_docx/present_simple/present-simple-positive/7097

Sourcing info:
https://www.middleweb.com/25179/how-we-learned-to-cite-our-sources/

In-essay corrections:
-Research "how to write a conclusion"

-show me the topic sentence for your body paragraph. Does it agree with the rest of the paragraph? Fix it.

-you still need to source your information

-future tense verbs

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-View the errors (highlighted)
-Correct and explain each error on the sheet given to you

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-More facts
-More examples
-More statistics
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxNvUWN3vYk

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My essay didn't have a strong structure and also the information is not enough. I think i need to change my boby paragraph to be more organize and detail. Also for the introduction and conclusion, they need to be stronger, and link to my body paragraph.

the final draft compare to the first and the second is better. because the first draft i have is not even in essay form. And also some of the ideas i did' t explain well. for the second draft, i have a starter and ending, but they are not explain what the topic is about. Also for the second one i don't know much about what i need to change. So when there is more comment for the second draft, then i know much more about which sentence or which idea need to improve to make it better.

My essay is still not the best it can be, because i didn't use many fact, and also the structure is not good.

In future  when i write an essay, i probably will plan first. so it will be more organize, and clear.

-------------------------------
-Why do you say you are ready to submit your essay again, but at the same time you say that the essay is still not the best it can be?

answere: because i need more time to do some research about the Reddit first. I don't really know about the Raddit, so when i write the essay i can just write the little fact that i already know.

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-What was your essay lacking? What did you need to change?
-How do you feel about your final draft, compared to your 2nd draft and 1st draft?
-Is your essay complete? Is it the best it can be? How do you know?
-How will you consider these things when writing future essays?

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what I can improve is to made this in essay form, and separate the paragraphs, and also need some more key words to made my information more clear. I also need some more facts with more details and more organize with the structure. To have a better introduction to hook my body paragraph.

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Good= she had a points from information that we learned.
Improve=Use some key words(maybe, I think, just because I don't know what to write, so just be aware.)

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Reddit has a unique discussion system. In your response, explain how discussion takes place on Reddit through the upvote/downvote system. You will discuss the pros and cons of this system. You will focus on the drawbacks, describing the ways this system can be abused, and discuss the ethical issues involved.Be sure to provide examples in your response, and think "outside the box" -- what are some other ways Reddit's voting system can influence discussion or be abused?

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Reddit has a unique discussion system. In your response, explain how discussion takes place on Reddit through the upvote/downvote system. You will discuss the pros and cons of this system. You will focus on the drawbacks, describing the ways this system can be abused, and discuss the ethical issues involved.Be sure to provide examples in your response, and think "outside the box" -- what are some other ways Reddit's voting system can influence discussion or be abused?

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End with an image:
Writing that describe a picture of scene.

End with an action:
Use action word to describe what you are doing.

End with reflection
To let readers know what you fee.
Reflection can tell a thought, or what happened.

Ending with dialogue:
talking at the end

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It was a cold day.--telling
The water on the ground froze in to ice. The sky was gray. People trembled under the tree with wind blowing through the leaves.It was so frigid, that even the tress seemed to shiver in the cold wind.--showing

It was a hot day.--telling
Today, people were sweating a lot. The water on the ground were evaporating by the heat from the sun.The dog under the tree stretch out his tongue. Everyone was drinking cold water, but the heat from the sun warmed up the water.

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It was a cold day.--telling
To day was a freezing day, the water on the ground freeze in to ice. The sky was gray. People tremble under the tree with wind blowing through the leaves.--showing

K: -- Try: "It was so frigid, that even the trees seemed to shiver in the cold wind" . The first sentence is more telling. Cut it out!

It was a hot day.--telling
Today is a hot day. People keep sweating. The water on the ground evaporating by the heat from the sun.The dog under the tree stick out his tongue. Everyone is drinking cold water, but the heat from the sum warm up the water.

K: First sentence is more telling. Cut it OUT! Pay attention to PT verbs!

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The Hiking was terrible. But the sight was beautiful. While we are hiking I can smell the the scent of the trees. I can hear the rustle of wind blowing through the leaves. The mountain we climb was extremely high. The ground was rough with stones on it.

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Taste: The faint taste of salt on the breeze.
Smell:The first smell of the sea through a car window.

Touch: The feel of cool cotton sheets on a summer night.
Sight:The scar on his chin that only shows up in a certain light.

Sound:The cry of the fox sounded like a child in terrible pain.

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2016.11.28--Things I need to work on for next time

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2016.11.28--Things I need to work on for next time

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1.To discuss one topic in one paragraph
2.Mark the source in every facts I have found

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2016. 11.21--What should I change the essay to make hit better

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2016. 11.21--What should I change the essay to make hit better

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1.Make sure my paragraph discuss one main idea.
2.Source all my fact
3.To write solution in paragraph from

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2016.10.24--How should you adapt your speech to different audiences?

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2016.10.24--How should you adapt your speech to different audiences?

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1.If I am talking to a stranger, I will be nice and show respect to them.Because I know nothing about  him/she, I don't know what kind of people he/she is.And people normally wants other to be nice and respect.
Example:"Hello, can you please tell me where ISA school is?"

2.If I am talking to a foreigner, I will also be nice and show respect, but I talk as slowly as I can, and try to make my sentence as easy as I can.Because they are foreigner, they are not familiar with the language I speak.
Example:"Hello,how are you?"

3.If I am talking to my friend, I will talk in a very free, and relax way. Because they are my friends, I know them very well, and we have knew each other many years.
Example:"Hey, how is your day!"

4.If I am talking to my parent, I will talk in the same way as my friend,but with a little bit respect. Because I live with them, familiar with them.
Example："Mom, what are we going to eat tonight"

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2016.10.17 -- What kind of expression did the Pickwell kids have on 
their faces when they saw how Maniac Magee was running? Use one of your 
vocabulary words, and explain.

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2016.10.17 -- What kind of expression did the Pickwell kids have on 
their faces when they saw how Maniac Magee was running? Use one of your 
vocabulary words, and explain.

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The expression Pickwell kids have on their faces when they saw how Maniac Magee was running is a look of puzzlement or suspicious.

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2016.10.17 -- What was dinner at the Pickwell home like? Describe.

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2016.10.17 -- What was dinner at the Pickwell home like? Describe.

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At the dinner time, Mrs.Valerie Pickwell whistled,and everyone was waiting for dinner.There are many people there,so only a Ping-Pong table was big enough to seat them all.They eat spaghetti every third night.

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2016.10.14 -- Four sentences using the facial expression vocabulary

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2016.10.14 -- Four sentences using the facial expression vocabulary

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Sentence one:He frowned at me in the school.
Sentence two:He shows his puzzlement face to everyone in the class.
Sentence three:He acts suspiciously when he is doing his homework.
Sentence four:People glare at others when they are angry.