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1- Using extremely simple language including ( big , a little bit ) we can transfer to ( enormous, quite..)
2- Don’t use But at the beginning of the sentence, we can use ( However, conversely..)
3- ( using the phrasal verbs) we can change them to ( stop , continuing, ..)
4- avoid using pronouns (I) and use some of stock phrases..

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1 in the past, it was hard to collect customer preferences. 2i would like to mention   3    4 they may end up be bankrupt?

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1.in the past,it could be hard to collect customer preferences.        2.shoule be mentioned                      3.nevertheless 4.   end up           5.this chat will be given two examples

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1. In the past， it was  difficult to collect customer preferences.
2. Big data in one of the most important technological advances will be considered in my later essay.
3. However,
4.

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1. In the past, it may be quite difficult to collect customer preference.
2. Big data is one of the most important progress made in technology.
3. Nowadays, it is convenient for fashion brands to know about consumer habits.
4. They probably will go bankrupt in the end;
5. The two examples will argument of the charts below...

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1.In the past, it was hard to learn/know customer preferences to some extent.
2.One of the most important technological advances I am going to introduce is big data.
3.However currently, it is extremely convenient for fashion brands to study costumer habits.
4.They may eventually bankrupt.

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1.In the past , it could be hard to collect the preference of customers.was- could be
2.
3. However, it is very convenient for fashion brands to study consumption habits.
4. end up--delete
5. this essay will discuss

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it can be said that the task of technology is contradiction, because of its great effect, however it may cause worse results.

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it can be said that the task of technology is contradiction, because of its great effect, however it may cause worse results.

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Break room 1
In my point of view, technology has benefits and drawbacks on the grounds that it is a marvellous idea in theory, whereas it is unacceptable in real life.

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To my opinion, technology is a double-edged sword , because it is positive in theory while it is not actually clear and could be a real pain.

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In my opinion， the question of technology is a double-edged sword because it is a great idea in theory but the sad reality is that it is not so clear and can be a real pain.

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Technology has both positive and negative sides, it is a good idea in theory but the reality is that it is not as clear-cut.

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it can be said that happiness and unhappiness for children using social media

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o

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The essay argues that why chirldren are happy or unhapy  using social media.

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The essay argues that why chirldren are happy or unhapy  using social media.

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it is discussed the reasons for children about

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one major consideration is that to recognize why children are happy or unhappy using social media.

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This essay examine the reasons for children are pleased or cheerless using social media

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One major consideration is why children are happy or unhappy using social media.

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One major consideration is why children are happy or unhappy using social media.

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The aim of this report to consider why children are happy or unhappy using social media.

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The aim of this report is to figure out why children are happy or unhappy using social media.

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One major consideration from the public is why children are happy or unhappy using social  media

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Aditionally, modern technology could be developed further.

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Aditionally, modern technology could be developed further.

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Furthermore, modern technology can be promoted further

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Futhermore, moreden technology may be developed further.

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Furthermore, technology could be better developed.

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Furthermore, modern technology can be developed better than earlier status.

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Besides，current technology can be better developed.

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Green ,Yuqing Zhang
Green ,Yuqing Zhang
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Green Yaoyao Xiong
Green Yaoyao Xiong
Furthermore, modern technology can 
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Blue, Jin Yan

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Furthermore, current technology can be developed significantly.

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Furthermore,current technology can be developed further

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Additionally /  Moreover       Probably be/ would be /may be

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Furthermore, modern technology can be more improved .

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Furthermore, modern technology can be more improved .

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Breakout room 5                                           Our assignment is to consider the reason of children's different attitude to social media. 

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Breakout room 5                                           Our assignment is to consider the reason of children's different attitude to social media. 

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Furthermore, technology can be more developed

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Breakout room8                    The essay argues that why chirldren are happy or unhapy  using social media.       

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Breakout room8                    The essay argues that why chirldren are happy or unhapy  using social media.       

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present-day/current/the latest/modern/new  technology,
newly/highly/strongly/well developed