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Dialogue-Action-Dialogue

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Marty will do anything to save his new friend Shiloh in this Newbery Medal-winning novel from Phillis Reynolds Naylor.

When Marty Preston comes across a young beagle in the hills behind his home, it's love at first sight-and also big trouble. It turns out the dog, which Marty names Shiloh, belongs to Judd Travers, who drinks too much and has a gun-and abuses his dogs. So when Shiloh runs away from Judd to Marty, Marty just has to hide him and protect him from Judd. But Marty's secret becomes too big for him to keep to himself, and it exposes his entire family to Judd's anger. How far will Marty have to go to make Shiloh his?

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Marty will do anything to save his new friend Shiloh in this Newbery Medal-winning novel from Phillis Reynolds Naylor.When Marty Preston comes across a young beagle in the hills behind his home, it's love at first sight-and also big trouble.

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Hi Writers,

Thanks to my friend, Mrs. Shepherd, I learned how to make choice boards on Google Slides. To give you more choices as writers, I created a revision choice board. This board is interactive and you can choose what you want to learn. I can't wait to hear how you revise your writing.

You want to click on the boxes on the choice board, not the play button.

Here is the link to the revision choice board.

I hope this choice board helps you make something wonderful today. Please share your writing with your teachers. I would love to see it too - Padlet Board.

Happy Writing!

Tammy Mulligan co-authored It's All About the Books and Assessment in Perspective with Clare Landrigan. At work, you can find her teaching and collaborating alongside elementary teachers and kids. At home, you will find her in the garden, with her family, working with her therapy dog, or hiking in the woods. View all posts by Tammy Mulligan

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Grades 2-5 Writing Camp with Hoppy and Ranger: Session 34

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Hi Writers, Thanks to my friend, Mrs. Shepherd, I learned how to make choice boards on Google Slides. To give you more choices as writers, I created a revision choice board. This board is interactive and you can choose what you want to learn. I can't wait to hear how you revise your writing.

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From Crafting Writers K-6 Elizabeth Hale

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Moving from an entry to a narrative.  Use the moves you know whenever you are writing!

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Moving from an entry to a narrative.  Use the moves you know whenever you are writing!

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I am here to share with you a fun unit we just finished up, adding and editing dialogue in our writing.

I have some extremely creative writers this year, which is a teacher's dream come true! We all know that writing can be such a scary thing to teach sometimes because of how open-ended it is and because all of our students come to us with such varied prior knowledge and experiences with writing.

We started our dialogue unit by looking at our own writing and realizing that we needed to put said to bed. This means that students needed some help not only punctuating their dialogue, but also varying their dialogue tags. In the past, I have done lessons on said is dead, but this year, we talked about the importance of not actually killing said. The word said is important and should be used in student's writing. Without it, their dialogue tags may make their writing a bit too wordy, so it is perfectly acceptable to use it every so often.

To begin the unit, we created this anchor chart together as a class. We flipped through some picture books that had dialogue and thought about why authors put dialogue in stories.

We then read the book, Yertle the Turtle by Dr. Seuss together as a class, and every time my students heard a synonym for said, they gave me a thumbs up.
**Here are more picture book ideas that I have used in the past to teach this unit.
After reading Yertle the Turtle, we then created a class thesaurus full of words that are synonyms for said. Students used the dialogue tags from Yertle the Turtle, and I also asked them to stretch their thinking to other stories they have either read or written in the past. Below is the list they came up with:

My students wanted to keep going with their synonyms, but I had to cut them off at some point!

Students were to then go back to their own writing and edit the dialogue tags to put said to bed.

While conferencing with some students, I noticed this quick doodle in one of my student's notebooks. Ha!

At least he was paying attention to the lesson, right?!

On the next day, we looked through more picture books and chapter books to come up with the rules that writers use to punctuate and edit dialogue. You can read more about that lesson in part 2 HERE.

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Writing Dialogue Part 1 - Young Teacher Love

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I am here to share with you a fun unit we just finished up, adding and editing dialogue in our writing. I have some extremely creative writers this year, which is a teacher's dream come true! We all know that writing can be such a scary thing to teach sometimes because of how open-ended it is and [...]

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Using mentor texts to teach: elaboration, onomatopoeia, setting.

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Cynthia Rylant is the author of more than 100 books for young people, including the beloved Henry and Mudge, Annie and Snowball, Brownie & Pearl, Motor Mouse, and Mr. Putter & Tabby series. Her novel Missing May received the Newbery Medal. She lives in Lake Oswego, Oregon.

Suçie Stevenson is the acclaimed author and illustrator of more than fifty books for children and is best known as the illustrator of the popular Henry and Mudge books by Cynthia Rylant. She lives on Cape Cod, Massachusetts, with her little cocker spaniel, Gracie.

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For Henry and his big dog Mudge, summer means going on a picnic in the park, taking a bath under the garden hose, and going to the top of the big green hill. Copyright © Libri GmbH. All rights reserved.

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Teaching sentence structure, leads, variety in sentence length.

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A special movie tie-in edition of R.J. Palacio's #1 New York Times bestseller.

Over 8 million people have fallen in love with Wonder and Auggie Pullman, the ordinary boy with the extraordinary face, who inspired a movement to Choose Kind and an upcoming graphic novel White Bird - on sale 10/1/2019!

This special movie tie-in edition features an eight-page full-color insert with photos from the film, a foreword by the director Stephen Chbosky, an afterword by R.J. Palacio, a behind-the-scenes look at the making of the movie with anecdotes from the cast and crew, and a family discussion guide.

August Pullman was born with a facial difference that, up until now, has prevented him from going to a mainstream school. Starting 5th grade at Beecher Prep, he wants nothing more than to be treated as an ordinary kid--but his new classmates can't get past Auggie's extraordinary face. WONDER, now a #1 New York Times bestseller and included on the Texas Bluebonnet Award master list, begins from Auggie's point of view, but soon switches to include his classmates, his sister, her boyfriend, and others. These perspectives converge in a portrait of one community's struggle with empathy, compassion, and acceptance.

"Wonder is the best kids' book of the year," said Emily Bazelon, senior editor at Slate.com and author of Sticks and Stones: Defeating the Culture of Bullying and Rediscovering the Power of Character and Empathy. In a world where bullying among young people is an epidemic, this is a refreshing new narrative full of heart and hope. R.J. Palacio has called her debut novel "a meditation on kindness" --indeed, every reader will come away with a greater appreciation for the simple courage of friendship. Auggie is a hero to root for, a diamond in the rough who proves that you can't blend in when you were born to stand out.

Join the conversation: #thewonderofwonder, #choosekind

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A special movie tie-in edition of R.J. Palacio's #1 New York Times bestseller. Over 8 million people have fallen in love with Wonder and Auggie Pullman, the ordinary boy with the extraordinary face, who inspired a movement to Choose Kind and an upcoming graphic novel White Bird - on sale 10/1/2019!

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Born and raised in New York City, Jane Yolen now lives in Hatfield, Massachusetts. She attended Smith College and received her master's degree in education from the University of Massachusetts. The distinguished author of more than 170 books, Jane Yolen is a person of many talents. When she is not writing, Yolen composes songs, is a professional storyteller on the stage, and is the busy wife of a university professor, the mother of three grown children, and a grandmother.

Active in several organizations, Yolen has been on the Board of Directors of the Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators, was president of the Science Fiction Writers of America from 1986 to 1988, is on the editorial board of several magazines, and was a founding member of the Western New England Storytellers Guild, the Western Massachusetts Illustrators Guild, and the Bay State Writers Guild. For twenty years, she ran a monthly writer's workshop for new children's book authors. In 1980, when Yolen was awarded an honorary Doctor of Law degree by Our Lady of the Elms College in Chicopee, Massachusetts, the citation recognized that "throughout her writing career she has remained true to her primary source of inspiration--folk culture." Folklore is the "perfect second skin," writes Yolen. "From under its hide, we can see all the shimmering, shadowy uncertainties of the world." Folklore, she believes, is the universal human language, a language that children instinctively feel in their hearts.

All of Yolen's stories and poems are somehow rooted in her sense of family and self. The Emperor and the Kite, which was a Caldecott Honor Book in 1983 for its intricate papercut illustrations by Ed Young, was based on Yolen's relationship with her late father, who was an international kite-flying champion. Owl Moon, winner of the 1988 Caldecott Medal for John Schoenherr's exquisite watercolors, was inspired by her husband's interest in birding.

Yolen's graceful rhythms and outrageous rhymes have been gathered in numerous collections. She has earned many awards over the years: the Regina Medal, the Kerlan Award, the World Fantasy Award, the Society of Children's Book Writers Award, the Mythopoetic Society's Aslan Award, the Christopher Medal, the Boy's Club Jr. Book Award, the Garden State Children's Book Award, the Daedalus Award, a number of Parents' Choice Magazine Awards, and many more. Her books and stories have been translated into Japanese, French, Spanish, Chinese, German, Swedish, Norwegian, Danish, Afrikaans, !Xhosa, Portuguese, and Braille.

With a versatility that has led her to be called "America's Hans Christian Andersen," Yolen, the child of two writers, is a gifted and natural storyteller. Perhaps the best explanation for her outstanding accomplishments comes from Jane Yolen herself: "I don't care whether the story is real or fantastical. I tell the story that needs to be told."

copyright ? 2000 by Penguin Putnam Books for Young Readers. All rights reserved.

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Celebrating 30 years of the beloved classic Owl Moon from renowned children's book author Jane Yolen and Caldecott Medal-winning illustrator John Schoenherr! Late one winter night a little girl and her father go owling. The trees stand still as statues and the world is silent as a dream.

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"Because" by Mo Willems (read by Von Morgan, Richardson Park Elementary School)

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PDF: Print and have students read as writers. Identify ONE skill you would like to develop. This piece can be used many times for many different things.

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Six New Narrative Picture Books for Your Mentor Text Basket + a Giveaway

I've been thinking a lot about the mentor texts we share with students at the beginning of the school year. In most classrooms, the school year begins with narrative writing. As I mentioned in my April 2019 post, "Curating an Array of Mentor Texts," I think it's important to use a variety of mentor texts that will match both the reading and writing abilities of students. It is critical to providing a variety of texts to meet students' needs if we are committed to differentiating instruction.

Summer is nearly upon us. While we spend time relaxing and renewing ourselves during summer vacation, many of us reflect on the school year that has passed and think about ways to freshen up our practice for the following school year. Just as we revisit our teaching practices, we can reflect and refine the mentor texts we share with students in minilessons, writing conferences, and strategy lessons.

In "Inclusive Mentor Texts: Teaching Writing with a Social Justice Lens," I shared some questions to consider when selecting books to share for writing workshop. While I hope you'll read the whole post, here are some of the questions, which Melanie Meehan adapted from Social Justice Books, to help teachers think about cultural awareness when selecting picture books to share with kids in writing workshop.

Click on the image to enlarge.

I want to help you get started on your quest by sharing some newer picture books (most of which create cultural awareness) that can serve as exemplary mentor texts to lift the level of students' narrative writing.

by Mo Willems and Amber Ren

Publisher's Summary: Mo Willems, a number one New York Times best-selling author and illustrator, composes a powerful symphony of chance, discovery, persistence, and magic in this moving tale of a young girl's journey to center stage. Illustrator Amber Ren brings Willems' music to life, conducting a stunning picture-book debut.

A Few Craft Moves You Can Teach Young Writers: The Way We Are Known Ending; Developing Setting/Creating a Sense of Era Lead; Movement of Time and Place; Pacing; Precise Nouns; Punctuation to Create Voice (e.g., commas, dashes); Repetition; Vivid Verbs;

Publisher's Summary: "On reunion morning, we rise before the sun. Daddy hums as he packs our car with suitcases and a cooler full of snacks. He says there's nothing like going down home."
Down home is Granny's house. Down home is where Lil' Alan and his parents and sister will join great-grandparents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. Down home is where Lil' Alan will hear stories of the ancestors and visit the land that has meant so much to all of them. And down home is where all of the children will find their special way to pay tribute to family history. All the kids have to decide on what tribute to share, but what will Lil' Alan do?

A Few Craft Moves You Can Teach Young Writers: Character Details; Dialogue Advances the Story; Circular Ending; Hyphenated Words; Internal Thinking; Combination Lead (i.e., developing setting/meeting the characters); Power of Three; Setting Details; Show, Not Tell; Varied Sentence Lengths.

Ojichan's Gift by Chieri Uegaki and Genevieve Simms

Publisher's Summary: When Mayumi was born, her grandfather created a garden for her. It was unlike any other garden she knew. It had no flowers or vegetables. Instead, Ojiichan made it out of stones: big ones, little ones and ones in-between. Every summer, Mayumi visits her grandfather in Japan, and they tend the garden together. Raking the gravel is her favorite part. Afterward, the two of them sit on a bench and enjoy the results of their efforts in happy silence. But then one summer, everything changes. Ojiichan has grown too old to care for his home and the garden. He has to move. Will Mayumi find a way to keep the memory of the garden alive for both of them?

A Few Craft Moves You Can Teach Young Writers: Back Matter (i.e., translations and pronunciations of Japanese words); Strong Character Development; Code Switching; Dialogue That Advances the Story; Combination Ending (i.e., final action/wraparound) Developing Setting Lead; Movement of Time and Place; Precise Words; Show, Not Tell; Varied Sentence Lengths;

Publisher's Summary: Washed ashore alone, a tiny sea otter pup needs help! Soon, a rescuer is there, to take her in and keep her warm and fed. The pup faces challenges in her new life without her sea otter family. But with the love and care of her rescuer, she flourishes in her new home. Inspired by a true story, Pup 681 is a heartwarming and hopeful tale about family and love.

A Few Craft Moves You Can Teach Young Writers: Author's Note; Back Matter (i.e., fact sheet); Combination Ending (i.e., accomplishments/advice to the reader); Heart of the Story Unfolds Bit-by-Bit; Setting Details Lead; Interesting Print Layout; Punctuation to Create Voice (e.g., dashes, ellipses points, varied end punctuation); Speech Bubbles; Varied Sentence Lengths.

The Snow Lion by Jim Helmore and Richard Jones

Publisher's Summary: After moving to a new home, Caro wishes she had a friend, but she's too shy to meet the neighborhood kids. With a little imagination, however, Caro finds the Snow Lion. Together, they have all kinds of fun racing, climbing, and playing hide-and-seek. But when the boy next door asks Caro to come play, Caro isn't so sure. Then, the Snow Lion has an idea! Making new friends isn't always easy, but it is always worth it in the end.

A Few Craft Moves You Can Teach Young Writers: Dialogue to Advance the Story, Wraparound Ending; Setting Details Lead; Interesting Print Layout; Punctuation to Create Voice (e.g., ellipses points); Varied Sentence Lengths; Vivid Verbs.

Publisher's Summary: "Misery loves company," Mama says to James Otis. It's been a rough couple of months for them, but Mama says as long as they have their health and strength, they're blessed. One Sunday before Valentine's Day, Reverend Dennis makes an announcement during the service- the Temples have lost everything in a fire, and the church is collecting anything that might be useful to them. James thinks hard about what he can add to the Temple's "love box," but what does he have worth giving? With her extraordinary gift for storytelling, McKissack-with stunning illustrations by Harrison-delivers a touching, powerful tale of compassion and reminds us all that what is given from the heart, reaches the heart.

A Few Craft Moves You Can Teach Young Writers: Dialogue That Advances the Story; Connecting with the Reader/Discovery Ending; Internal Thinking; Taking Readers Into the Past Lead; Movement of Time and Place; Precise Words; Punctuation to Create Voice (e.g., commas in lists, dashes); Strong Character Details.

Once you get these books - and others - in your hands, check out Melanie Meehan's posts about pathways for narrative writing! Click here to read part one and click here to read part two.
Giveaway Information:
This giveaway is for a copy of each of the following books: Because, Going Down Home with Daddy, Ojichan's Gift, Pup 681: A Sea Otter Story, The Snow Lion, What Is Given from the Heart. Many thanks to Henry Holt, Hyperion, Kids Can Press, Peachtree Publishing Company, and Schwartz & Wade for donating a copy of each of these books for one lucky reader.

For a chance to win these six books, please leave a comment about this post by Friday, June 7th at 11:59 a.m. EDT. I'll use a random number generator to pick the winners, whose names I will announce at the bottom of this post, by Sunday, June 9th.

NOTE: You must have a U.S. mailing address to enter this giveaway.

Please be sure to leave a valid e-mail address when you post your comment, so I can contact you to obtain your mailing address if you win. From there, my contacts at each of the above-mentioned publishers will ship your books out to you. (NOTE: Your e-mail address will not be published online if you leave it in the e-mail field only.)

If you are the winner of the book, I will email you with the subject line of TWO WRITING TEACHERS - NEW NARRATIVE PICTURE BOOKS. Please respond to my e-mail with your mailing address within five days of receipt. Unfortunately, a new winner will be chosen if a response isn't received within five days of the giveaway announcement.

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Six New Narrative Picture Books for Your Mentor Text Basket + a Giveaway

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I've been thinking a lot about the mentor texts we share with students at the beginning of the school year. In most classrooms, the school year begins with narrative writing. As I mentioned in my April 2019 post, "Curating an Array of Mentor Texts," I think it's important to use a variety of mentor texts that will match both the reading and writing abilities of students.

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Spicing Up Revision

With the New York City sun glinting through the windows of the large annex room of Riverside Chapel, I patiently sat and watched the other teachers gather their belongings and shuffle toward the exit. The presenter in front, having just finished his session, stood bent over a worn leather briefcase, packing up some papers. I stood up and approached him. "Carl?" I quipped. Looking up, Carl made eye contact with me. "Oh, hi there," he said. I continued, "During your session today you mentioned a little about your revision process...could I ask you a quick question?" Since this man was none other than teacher/writer/speaker Carl Anderson, I thought I'd make the most of this opportunity to ask my question. "Yes, of course," he responded. I explained to Carl that as a middle school literacy coach I had become aware of teachers using the comments function on Google docs to "confer" with writers. I wondered what he thought of this practice. "Well," he began, "it's fine...as long as the writer already knows how to do whatever you're asking. But if they don't already know how to do it, they need you to teach them how." Carl went on to explain that while writing his most recent book, A Teacher's Guide to Writing Conferences, his editor had sometimes been able to just tell him to do something- like remove x amount of words (the equivalent of a Google comment). But she had also had to teach him things he didn't know. For example, she couldn't just tell him, "Make this part sound like a handbook." Since he hadn't written a handbook before, teaching- and conferring- was required.

Returning home from the Teachers College Reading & Writing Project Reunion in New York City later that day, I thought a lot about what Carl had taught; especially as it related to revision. As a classroom teacher, I certainly remembered telling some of my writers things like, "Add more detail," or "Be more descriptive." While these phrases were well-meaning, I would not exactly consider them...well, very specific or concrete strategies my writers could already employ independently. As I look back now, I can see now that more specificity- more teaching - was likely needed.

During the revision phase of the writing process, I find that many writers will often 'tinker' rather than really revise for meaning. Perhaps you've see similar behaviors in your middle school writers? For example, during revision, writers might change a word here and there and call that "revising." It's difficult for them to think, "What am I really trying to say?" As teachers, we strive (and struggle at times) to impart the idea to our writers that revising is so much more than tinkering! We want our students to think bigger when it comes to revision. We want them to understand that revision is about rethinking, reworking, rewriting perhaps whole sections- or even an entire piece!- of writing.

Because the question of "What am I really trying to say?" drives all writers.
The Revision Game
Earlier on that same Saturday, I had attended a workshop session on revision led by writer and staff developer Pablo Wolfe. During his workshop, Pablo expertly suggested a few helpful tips on ways we might teach middle school writers to become more independent and purposeful. I wrote about some of those tips here.

In addition, Pablo offered a small template for conversation (in a conference or small group) that I've paraphrased below:

TEACHER: "What do you want your reader to feel or think?" Teacher elicits answer from student.

In whatever way teachers choose to hold this conversation with writers, the purpose here is that it can provide kids a revision goal for the day. Once they have an idea of how they will rethink, rework, or rewrite a section or piece to answer the questions above, writers can forge ahead with a goal for meaningful revision in mind.

As a follow-up to support writers, Pablo also suggested that teachers consider adding a game-like feature to students' revision work: He called it "The Revision Game" (see image here):

These cards (which include argumentative and informational writing) can be found by clicking here. Pablo suggested cutting the cards out and allowing students to select randomly. This "game" can provide an avenue or goal toward revision work! But we must remember what Carl Anderson said: "... if they don't already know how to do it, they need you to teach them how." For example, if a student draws a card that says, "You could try adding dialogue that helps us understand the character better," and the student doesn't know how to do that... this may not be helpful. So another way to utilize these cards might be in a more heavily scaffolded way, with teachers demonstrating and or explaining with an example from a mentor text or teacher-created text.

Many of you may just be getting started with school, while others find themselves already several days or weeks into the new academic year. I'm hoping this post provides a couple of possibilities to add to your teaching toolkit as you look ahead to the coming days or weeks. Some of your writers might benefit from some fresh ideas around revising!

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During the revision phase of the writing process, I find that many writers will often 'tinker' rather than really revise for meaning. Perhaps you've see similar behaviors in your middle school writers? Read on to learn a few tips for spicing up revision!

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An Elaboration Tool for Self-reflection and Revision

"Show don't tell," we say over and over to students.

It's harder than it sounds, though, maybe for multiple reasons. First of all, sometimes writers DO tell. Sometimes, we just need to relay some information or make a scene go by quickly. As early as fourth grade, we have lessons that involve the differences between scenes and summaries. Summaries can be important in the narrative writer's tool bag because if we're going to slow down important parts, then we have to speed up non-important parts, and that involves telling and not showing.

Another issue that complicates the showing/telling conundrum is how do you really do it? Show don't tell is trickier that it sounds. Working to make this concept become more visible for students, I teach them that there are four main elaboration strategies when they are writing narrative pieces: action, description, dialogue, and inner thinking.

With this chart in place, I introduce them to a "tool" that has these four strategies on it.

My challenge to myself and then to students is to go through their pieces, sometimes an entire piece and sometimes just in sections, and tally the number of times any of the strategies appear. In the example below, I used a story I've been modeling for a third-grade classroom about Cally who decided that she really wanted bangs and took matters into her own hands.

With this chart in place, students helped me with a reflective critique about my developing story. The tallies revealed places where I overdid a specific strategy as well as places where I maybe underdid a strategy. We had some great conversations about balance and whether stories need to have an equal number of strategies or if it's okay to have some outweighing the others. We agreed that there are times when these strategies need not be equal, but our job as writers is to be intentional. "You just need to know," one boy said, and his classmates agreed. The tool below is from the middle part of one of their stories when the main character breaks her arm.

"The action is so important in that part that it's okay to have so much action compared to the other three," one student declared- a sophisticated reflection about elaboration and its role in story.

While this chart and tool is specific to narrative writing, there's no reason it couldn't be tweaked for information or opinion writing. Just as narrative writing has concrete strategies for elaboration, so do the other genres. For information writing, elaboration strategies could, depending on your grade level, include facts, small stories, comparisons, description, or explanations. Likewise those strategies for opinion writing could be giving examples, explaining examples, using quotes, statistics, or facts, and addressing the other side.

Whenever we can make abstract concepts seem more concrete for our students, we create pathways of growth for them, and whenever we can encourage revision, the better for students. After all, revision is the process that makes writing better- for all of us.

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An Elaboration Tool for Self-reflection and Revision

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"Show don't tell," we say over and over to students. It's harder than it sounds, though, maybe for multiple reasons. First of all, sometimes writers DO tell. Sometimes, we just need to relay some information or make a scene go by quickly. As early as fourth grade, we have lessons that involve the differences between scenes and summaries.

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When I was a kindergarten teacher the first words, letters, and sounds written by my students were an entryway for celebration. What had once been oral stories, pictures, and scribbles would begin to take shape and carry symbolic meaning. The students' desire to create books radiated with motivation and as their understandings unraveled so did the readability of their work.

As I watch my third-grade students transition into the year, honoring the first words remains relevant. Students often equate hard work with time and quantity.

"Look, I filled a page!"

"I worked for ten minutes straight!"

Validating the time, effort, and quantity of their writing is important however it is also important to show them that flexibility within the writing process is what makes our first words meaningful in the end.

Starting the year with the mindset that our first words hold with them open ended possibilities allows a new entryway of celebration, revision. Moving from kindergarten to third-grade a few years ago was exciting and eye-opening. Revision with five and six-year old writers was somewhat effortless. Stories were short. Making changes was fun because we used highlighters, tape, and add-on (spider legs) which were new and exciting tools. I've found, some third-grade students equate revision with a simple cross out or changing said to a fancier word. Anything beyond a few changes can initially appear overwhelming. I mean my goodness, they spent all this time drafting, and now changes are needed? I learned quickly to encourage revision as an opportunity. My writers had to understand that revision was not just something you do near the end but anytime. Even when you least expect it!

Here are three tips I've used to help students move past seeing revision as a check mark on a list and instead, a cyclical process that is always available to any writer.

TIP ONE:

Ideas are like journeys! Get your first words on the paper but remember, they are your first words, and need not be your last.

TIP TWO:

Writing is messy! Show students examples of how messy it can be, acknowledging that it is their masterpiece. Artists paint over paintings all the time! The result is almost always a better depiction of their vision.

TIP THREE:

Write, Stop, Read, Ask

Be a flexible thinker and revise as you go. Teaching writers to write, stop, read, and ask can be a helpful routine to establish creating students who meet revision with thoughts, words, and ideas.

As I end the second week of a new school year, I am reminded that these first words are still important. The importance of the words I choose to say in response to their work is equally important. I want to ignite the spark of motivation for my students to carry on, start over, or begin a new piece. I hope to light up my writers this year.

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Three Tips to Avoid Overcommitting to First Words: Revision

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When I was a kindergarten teacher the first words, letters, and sounds written by my students were an entryway for celebration. What had once been oral stories, pictures, and scribbles would begin to take shape and carry symbolic meaning. The students' desire to create books radiated with motivation and as their understandings unraveled so did the readability of their work.

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Revision needs to have a sense that a window of possibility is still open to allow another draft in (17).

-Jeff Anderson and Deborah Dean

Last month, I conferred with a fifth grade writer who drafted a "personal narrative" that read more like an informational piece. He was supposed to be crafting a personal narrative, but it was clear didn't know what made something story-like. Once he realized he hadn't written in the genre his teacher assigned, we talked about what makes something a narrative. I used a mentor text that showed clear story parts and talked about it having a problem and a solution. Then, I asked him to use some of what he had already written when to revise his writing in the genre his teacher assigned (using a storytelling voice). He looked at me as if I was giving him the choice to choose between cutting off his arm or cutting off his leg. He was so wedded to what he had written that he couldn't imagine it being revised. I touched-base with his teacher after our conference and discovered revision wasn't something that was really being taught in the classroom. As a result, I encouraged her to do some revision work with the entire class so revision, which most writers find challenging, wouldn't feel so scary.

Jeff Anderson and Deborah Dean have a new book that deals with revision in grades 4 - 10. Revision Decisions: Talking Through Sentences and Beyond is a professional book that will help students realize that reseeing, reformulating, redesigning, rethinking, recasting, reshaping, and retweaking isn't so scary. In fact it can be fun! (Yes, I wrote FUN!)

Writing is messy. As teachers we need to provide our students with opportunities to see our struggles as writers. When students see us revise (i.e., rewriting, throwing out chunks of text, adding new parts), they'll come to understand that revision is a natural part of the writing process.

Great writing usually doesn't pour out in first drafts. All writers need time and space to revise sentences, paragraphs, or whole pieces of writing multiple times to get it right.

As teachers, we orchestrate situations that cause talk and problem solving. We create an environment where tussling and playing with words is routine rather than rare. Through interaction and conversation, we create flexible writers who can easily teach with today's changing writing landscape and can also be imprinted with unchangeable truths about writing and how we compose (4).

I had a bunch of questions for Jeff and Deborah. I hope their responses get you excited about their book, which is a must-have if you'd like to help your students become more adept revisers.

Q: Tell me a bit about how you got the idea for Revision Decisions.

A: We were both interested in the 2007 Writing Next report, particularly the findings on the importance and success of sentence combining. We both had interest in grammar, which made that section of particular interest. We ran into each other at different conferences and started talking about the idea of a book. It grew from talk and emails. The idea of play and risk and talk took shape. We had a lot of metaphors for play at first and had an initial title of Combining Conversations. The book-as books will do-evolved, but it started with common interest.

Q: What is the biggest thing you want teachers to take away from your new book?

We hope teachers will take away the big idea that writing and revision require an abundance of talk and lots of trying out of/playing with ideas. The skills associated with writing take time to develop, but giving students lots of practice where it's okay to take risks and make mistakes and find success is essential to that growth through time.

A: Some teachers are hesitant to provide as much student-talk and discussion time as you call for in Revision Decisions. What would you say to convince them of the importance of ample time for children & young adults to work together and talk about the revision process?

We need to consider that students may not be aware of how the words they write actually sound. By talking out our revision attempts, we build the sense of sound that is essential to effective writing. In addition, we provide an intentional structure so that purposeful talk and the magic happen. Short spurts of talk start before longer ones do. Facilitating talk is an investment that pays off.

Q: On that same line of thinking, how can you help teachers create classrooms full of students who are capable of doing this high-level revision work in collaboration with each other?

A: The lessons in Revision Decisions progress in such a way that students experience revision moves thorough demonstration, guided practice in groups and pairs, and then finally they apply the skills to their own writing. We were intentional about structuring the lessons so that students have support and structures and language for successful classroom talk and application so that they will be ready to work independently. One issue we saw with earlier sentence combining books is that this gradual release wasn't always addressed.

Q: Why is the DRAFT acronyms so powerful?

A: DRAFT is easy to remember and it applies at multiple levels-it's about the concrete things revisers do. Each letter gives writers a discrete action or option they have to make writing better. And in both large and small situations they apply. Before a writer can delete paragraphs and move around larger sections of writing they have to know those acts, and DRAFT gives teachers manageable chunks to teach. In the end, they all the options start to blend together, but first we have to know our discrete options.

Q: Would you explain how Revision Decisions helps teachers move students towards the grade level standards set forth by the Common Core?

A: The CC in elementary levels actually asks students to combine sentences, but in general we are working with creating effective sentences-and that's a part of the CC for all levels. Depending on the grade level, teachers can use and model lessons that apply to standards appropriate for the grade level they teach. We have worked with elementary teachers, grades 2-6. The grade two teachers were using a simplified version from the book-combining only two sentences. But we talked about what their students needed-to use commas with intro elements. We found some sentences to combine that specifically allowed teachers to give students practice with that comma work in authentic ways. The same thing applies at other grade levels: teachers can adapt and select to meet their students' needs and the CC standards for their grade level.

Q: Talk about the work of de-combining. How do you create examples for kids like the ones we see on the practice pages in the appendix (e.g., pgs 142, 145, 146)?

A: This is the most fun, almost like a puzzle. And upper elementary, middle school, and high school students also find it fun. The secret is to see how many basic ideas are really embedded in a single sentence and then give each one its own sentence. Students take a sentence apart to its most basic elements and ideas. And they took pride in finding and creating more kernel sentences than we could. The key is seeing what the sentence is saying-and that's why it's such good work for students to do, too. De-combining aids both comprehension and composition.

Q: You talked about the application of this work on pages 54-55. Can you say more about how long teachers can expect it to take upper elementary students, middle schoolers, & high schoolers to apply this work to their own reading and writing lives?

A: The thing we love about application is that this work applies to all levels-and can be adapted for the needs of students. We can choose more involved sentences or simpler ones. We can choose sentences that give general practice with sentence fluency or we can find sentences that have the potential to teach our students a specific construction, such as appositives. We have examples of that in the book. And the more adept students become with these practices, the more they will apply them to their writing.

This is a gradual process. It will take time. That's one thing we have to remember about many effective instructional practices: they take time to work. I think of peer feedback-it takes time for the full effects to be seen. We don't give up because the first time we ask students to give feedback they aren't very good at it. Instead, we keep at it. That's how we see this work. It is cumulative, and the kind of talk students need to develop takes time. Eventually, the kind of talk seems natural, and the structures we have practiced start to show up spontaneously or in first drafts.

Q: What one change can teachers make that will move their students towards more purposeful revision?

A: Encouraging students to make more than one try and then talking out the two (or more) versions to feel the effects. Like talk, revision can be and often should be generative. This teaches students from the inside out to consider more than their first attempt and to talk things out.

Q: What is next for you as both writers and educators?

A: We are looking forward to presenting about Revision Decisions together.

Debbie: I have had an interest in nonfiction for a long time. I have a couple of projects I'm just beginning with that interest. One deals with helping teachers engage students in more varied and interesting (and authentic) nonfiction writing. The other is actually where I'm trying my hand at my own informational writing.

Jeff: I am excited to be traveling around the US and even New Zealand this spring, talking about Revision Decisions. I am putting the finishing touches on my first middle grade novel, tentatively titled, Luke Veracruz and the Chocolate Emergency (Sterling, Fall 2015). I am also in the beginning stages of taking my invitational grammar work to grades 1-5 in a book with the working title of Patterns of Power.

Thanks for having us your show. 😉

GIVEAWAY INFORMATION:

This giveaway is for a copy of Revision Decisions: Talking Through Sentences and Beyond. Many thanks to Stenhouse Publishers for donating a copy for one reader.

For a chance to win this copy of Revision Decisions, please leave a comment about this post by Monday, November 17th at 11:59 p.m. Eastern Time. I'll use a random number generator to pick the winners, whose names I will announce at the bottom of this post, by Tuesday, November 18th.

Please be sure to leave a valid e-mail address when you post your comment, so I can contact you to obtain your mailing address if you win. From there, my contact at Stenhouse will ship your book out to you. (NOTE: Your e-mail address will not be published online if you leave it in the e-mail field only.)

Comments are now closed.

Thank you to everyone who left a comment about Revision Decisions. I used a random number generator and Susie's commenter number was selected. Here's what she wrote:

I love the DRAFT acronym. That, alone, makes me want to dig into this book. Last year, Main St. in the little town where I taught was in the process of a huge makeover. I spent a lunch period outside taking pictures of the construction. Then we were able to use it as an analogy all year. "Revision is like Main St. It was fine and functioning before, but people had a vision for how it could be better. So,right now it's really messy. There's dirt and cones and torn up sidewalks, and blocked lanes. But, we can start to see how it's going to get better, with tree parks in the center, bigger sidewalks, etc. " it was right outside our window....a "concrete" image of revision.

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Revision Decisions Blog Tour: A Q&A with Anderson and Dean

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Revision needs to have a sense that a window of possibility is still open to allow another draft in (17). -Jeff Anderson and Deborah Dean Last month, I conferred with a fifth grade writer who drafted a "personal narrative" that read more like an informational piece.

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There were only three more days until Ms. Teacherby's* third grade class was going to hold a publishing party to celebrate the amazing work they had done on their information books. Over the course of the past month each child had drafted several different books, and had chosen their favorite to revise, edit, and publish.

I was visiting the class as a consultant and as a researcher. I was a familiar face to the kids, having visited many times. I had seen the entire writing process unfold in their classroom across the past few weeks. "What are you working on? How's it going?" was my usual question to start a conference or a conversation with kids, but today, since it was near the end of the unit, I was asking something different. "What are you publishing?" I asked. "Do you know what's happening on Friday?" "Who will be reading your book?" I asked.

Almost every kid answered something along the lines of, "Huh?" or "What is publishing?" or "I don't know."

It soon became apparent that kids didn't have a clear sense of where they had been , or where they were going in the writing process. Ms. Teacherby caught on to this too, and we both were equally surprised by this revelation. The thing that we thought was most obvious, most central to writing workshop (writing process and publishing), was unknown to the kids.

At the end of the workshop, Ms. Teacherby and I gathered the kids and together created a chart to map out all the work they had done, from the beginning of the unit, to the upcoming publishing party.

Afterward, without students, we brainstormed different ways to help kids in the future understand how a unit would go, from the beginning, instead of waiting until the end.

Ways to Help Students Understand the Writing Process (and how a unit of study unfolds):

Create anchor charts together with the kids, for each part of the writing process for that unit (generating ideas, drafting, selecting a piece for publishing, revision, editing, publishing)

Set a date for the publishing party early on, and remind kids of it frequently. (Do a countdown to publishing each day)

Include more discussion of the entire writing process in each writing conference, instead of just the work the child is doing that day.

Retell the "story" of the unit periodically, summarizing what parts of the writing process have already happened, and what will happen next.

Show kids how to make their own personal plan for their writing, using the writing process.

The personal planning, we realized, was a huge missing piece. The kids were accustomed to the teacher essentially telling them what to do each day, rather than thinking ahead and planning for themselves. There was choice. They had lots of strategies to choose from, but they were living day-to-day, not really aware of what was to come next.

That's where Writing Calendars come in.

With a personal writing calendar, each kid can see what is going to happen in the unit of study, and has the power to adjust it. Even if all the kids' plans look somewhat identical to start, the act of writing down the plan, and then returning to it in conferences to adjust has huge potential for helping kids learn planning, decision making, thinking ahead (all key to executive functioning), and taking ownership over their own work.

Of course, a single strategy is not going to be effective for all students. Even adult writers can tell you that some of us are "planners" (people that benefit from and even enjoy planning out our work), and some of us are "pantsers" (people who benefit from and prefer writing day by day without a plan, going by the "seat of their pants").

A writing calendar is something you might try with your whole class, or perhaps just a small group or a few individuals who would benefit from having a better understanding of the overall writing process, and how a unit of study unfolds.

Once a calendar has been created, you can use it as a tool in many ways.

In a minilesson, you can suggest changes or adjustments that your whole class might make to their calendars.

In a mid-workshop interruption, you might suggest kids take out their calendars to self-assess where they are and if they need to make any changes to their plans.

In a conference, you can ask students to share their calendar with you, and make changes to their plans together.

In an end -of-workshop share, you might share a few examples of personal calendars.

Whether you are a "planner" or a "pantser" yourself, introducing personal writing calendars to your students might be just the thing you need to help students have a better understanding of the writing process.

*Pseudonym

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Personal Writing Calendars for Each Student

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There were only three more days until Ms. Teacherby's* third grade class was going to hold a publishing party to celebrate the amazing work they had done on their information books. Over the course of the past month each child had drafted several different books, and had chosen their favorite to revise, edit, and publish.

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Use slates, notebooks or paper to try out new moves. Share out and then have students try it out in a piece they have already written. **Not all will use it right away. Share the writing of those that do-end of lesson, on a bulletin board, on a chart.

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Choose a piece of text that exemplifies what you want children to try. Put it on the smartboard or make individual copies for students to share. Have them work with partners to identify what they notice. Share out. Try it out in their writing notebooks. Keep a list of the moves you have taught visible.

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Crafting Writers: K-6 Elizabeth Hale

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Show Not Tell

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Revising a story: Tips for young writers

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Authors Kate DiCamillo and Katherine Paterson discuss the Writing Process

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Rick Riordan: Three tips for young writers

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Please click here if you are not redirected within a few seconds.

Images
ELA Anchor Charts: Revision: View Your Writing Through Different ...

krzmarzickm.blogspot.com

Images may be subject to copyright.

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Please click here if you are not redirected within a few seconds. Images ELA Anchor Charts: Revision: View Your Writing Through Different ... krzmarzickm.blogspot.com Images may be subject to copyright.

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Teaching Kids About Revising (Writing Workshop Lesson)

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Importance of drawing and talking out stories-rehearsal.

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Kindergarten:  Use to write and talk about stories

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Grades 4-8

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Add in!

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Borrowed from Open Library

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Shortcut : Donald Crews : Free Download, Borrow, and Streaming : Internet Archive

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See what's new with book lending at the Internet Archive

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Writers Revise Through Drawing - Language Arts, Writing, Pre-K - Kindergarten

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S-A-I-D
Does the story include
Setting
Action
Internal Thought
Dialogue

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Use for dialogue and internal thinking

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One cool friend : Buzzeo, Toni : Free Download, Borrow, and Streaming : Internet Archive