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- 5 paragraphs
- 3 body paragraphs
- restates the claim in the conclusion.

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Its a serious and formal tone

The student is treating this as if they are an expert on this topic

They only use words like our once.

They use lots of numbers and dates to provide information, especially in the second paragraph.

They have long sentences

Most are compound or complex sentences

They employ the use of commas primarily.

They don’t really, they approach this topic with a formal tone

Only use lesser formal language in places to reference the fact of certain history.

They also use the phrase some people, to refer to others.

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Begins by rephrasing prompt slightly

Finishes intro paragraph with one-sentence claim

5 paragraphs

Organized as intro, body, body, body, conclusion

Intro and conclusion short and concise

Body paragraphs much longer, 6-9 sentences

Ends with a restatement of claim

Very short conclusion, 3 sentences

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1. Introduction - What is the opening line like? How do they start?

-The writer begins with statements regarding growth from textbooks to cell phones

-Writer sets the stage with some background information about the advancements in technology, production, and population

-Claim is clearly stated and easy to identify

2. Paragraphs - How many are there? How did they organize them? How long are the paragraphs?

-There are five paragraphs

-There is an introduction, two body paragraphs, a conclusion, and a follow up paragraph after the conclusion

-The body paragraphs are much longer, they contain most of the evidence and sources

-Most paragraphs are at least six or seven sentences long(body paragraphs are longer)

3. Conclusion - How does the essay end?

-Writer restates the claim

-A follow up paragraph is added after conclusion

-Shares some of the writers own opinions

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throughout the essay the writer occasionally switched into 1st person and incorporated several "our's", "we's" and "I's".

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They use four of the sources, but reference some of them multiple times.

They integrate the source material by stating parts of the material within their point and then signifying which source that idea comes from after.

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They answer the prompt really well. And the essay was boring, but that is due to the prompt.

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They claim in the introduction that libraries could become more prevalent but they never tell us why and in the conclusion they just say that they could maybe stay prevalent. Overall the conclusion and body paragraphs prove a different point than the introduction.

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- Uses evidence from sources: A, B, C, D.
-Source C is most frequently used.
-Most citations were paraphrases
-6 total citations in their essay

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All body paragraphs have at least 2 pieces of textual evidence

Throughout they used 4 different sources

Used an interview, a calendar, an article, and a chart

They only summarized or paraphrased the quotes into their body paragraphs

The textual evidence was worded in their own words and the author made it flow nicely into their own commentary

Their commentary was added typically after the evidence

This analysis allows readers to figure out the meaning behind the textual evidence

It backed up what the evidence was saying

Their commentary connected how the textual evidence related back to their claim

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The writer used source C the most, and cited their source after every sentence that had specific information. They frequently gave background info before integrating the source.

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written with a formal tone, uses first person in the introduction to show the writers opinion

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They didn't put quotation marks around quotes
Very clear, very easy to read and understand -- handwriting was also very neat

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They used mostly simple sentences with varying lengths

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1. Introduction - What is the opening line like? How do they start?

The first sentences don’t mention the actual topic. The latter half of the introduction is good background information for the reader.

2. Paragraphs - How many are there? How did they organize them? How long are the paragraphs?

Five paragraphs that seem to be in order of sources. They get longer as the essay goes, roughly 7 or 8 sentences long each.

3. Conclusion - How does the essay end?

Brief restatement of the thesis, followed with the evidence they gave during the essay.

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The student writer has a relaxed yet still factual tone.

They use simple vocabulary and repetitive points

This makes the essay easier to understand.

It almost feels as though you are having a conversation with someone.

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The print was very clear and easy to read.

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The writer paraphrased the information from the sources used (they used 4). They integrated the information smoothly into their sentences and included analysis simply but thoughtfully to explain their arguement.

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--There is an intro, three body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
--The opening line talks about how people can observe how fast certain rates grow in different areas and this led to talking about technology. The writer believes libraries should adapt to today's times involving technology.
--The conclusion is short and states how libraries should stay relevant to society.

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The writer had a formal tone throughout the essay. A lot of compound sentences. Sentences had a variety of lengths.

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The author did a great job creating a claim that could be easily backed by the sources provided.

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INTRO

*Starts off with the general idea of the topic.

*doesn't start off with abrupt (keeps it basic).

*The general idea pulls in the reader without overwhelming them.

*Topic introduced well.

Paragraphs

*There are 5 paragraphs.

*The body paragraphs are significantly larger than the intro and conclusion.
*Paragraphs don't directly support the claim.

Conclusion

*The conclusion is short.

*Strong conclusion but it does not connect to the claim and evidence.

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the writer directly cites the sources when using evidence, often putting which source they used in parenthesis. for example, the writer will put (source C) at the end of a sentence in which they used evidence from source c to support their claim.

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Conclusion repeats the thesis at the beginning and then lists the subclaims (reasons). The essay isn't finished and ends mid-sentence.

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-the child sounds Like a librarian. Kinda monotone, not really into it. I get little passion due to the lack of any adjectives.

-the sentences are usually 2 and a half lines. Plenty of comas to extend their lengths, kinda feels like a list.

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the author took the prompt and well integrated it with their writing. Their claim was well written.

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They used 4 sources, citing them 6 times total, with source C being cited three times. They generally followed their evidence with analysis. Their analysis took up more room than the evidence.

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1. Introduction - What is the opening line like? How do they start?

They start with a strong claim that brings the reader into the essay with lots of questions.

2. Paragraphs - How many are there? How did they organize them? How long are the paragraphs?

There are around 5 paragraphs within the essay. They slowly bring evidence to each thing they claim in their thesis.

3. Conclusion - How does the essay end?

They close their essay by stating their thesis slightly different then before, the by stating their opinion they can round out their point.

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- they used 4 sources

-They paraphrased information within their argument (brought it in as specific evidence)

- commentary generally is both before and after a piece of evidence (sometimes only one or the other, but it isn’t consistent)

- commentary is elaboration/more detailed versions of subclaims

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the placement of verbs such as "lastly" give the illusion of finality despite the actual placement, thus giving the reader a sense of ease, and makes continuations far more accessible, and whilst I may be looking into this esseys specific wording far too much, i need to put something here.

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varied and interesting sentence structures

there doesn’t seem to be a standard sentence length

uses unusual sentence structures

lists things after colons

rhetorical questions

uses some longer sentences, some really short and simples ones

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reads kind of like a narrative

each paragraph generally starts in the past, and then makes its way to eventually projecting the future