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Most new or expecting fathers wish they could be more involved at the birth or adoption of a child, yet many working dads lack the paternity leave (the time off from work given to new fathers at the birth or adoption of their child) they need to be with their family, while others are offered only unpaid leave.

The federal Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) covers about half of American workers and guarantees 12 weeks of unpaid leave. A handful of states also have laws requiring paid leave. However, most working fathers get no leave at all, leading advocates for fathers and families to call for stronger laws.
Desire for Paternity Leave
Research has consistently shown that most fathers want to play a greater role in their family's life. Almost all fathers rank their children as the top priority in their life, and three out of four want to spend more time with their children. A survey of 3000 working fathers found that almost 90% of them thought it was important for employers to the offer this important time off.

Yet the reality that many fathers face often doesn't match their desires. The majority of fathers take only one day of leave for the arrival of a new child and only a quarter take more than a week. Lack of paid leave, potential stigma and harm to a father's career all stand in the way of greater leave opportunities.
Paternity Leave Under the FMLA
The FMLA allows eligible employees to take up to 12 weeks of leave for reasons such as the arrival of a new child or to care for a pregnant spouse or sick child. This leave is unpaid, though employers are required to continue your healthcare coverage during your leave.

To qualify for leave under the FMLA, an employee must have worked for over 12 months for the state or federal government, a public school or private employer with more than 50 employees. In the last year, the employee must have worked 1,250 hours at the job and must work at a location with 50 or more employees within 75 miles.
State Laws Mandating Paternity Leave
Several states mandate paternity leave that is more inclusive than leave under the FMLA, including states with laws providing leave for care of partners and children in domestic partnerships and civil unions.

In 2004, California became the first state to require paid paternity and maternity leave for all employees. California's Paid Family Leave Insurance program covers part-time workers and employees of small businesses and allows workers to collect 55% of their earnings, up to a maximum amount, while on leave. Currently, New Jersey, Rhode Island and the District of Columbia also offer paid leave for fathers.
Proposed Changes to Paternity Leave Laws
Fathers who take leave can offer many benefits for a new family. Research has shown that men who help in caring for children after birth go on to divide family responsibilities more evenly between parents later in life; their children are more likely to have improved health. Mothers whose partners take leave have higher earnings and less depression, while men who take leave benefit from longer life expectancies.

Many advocates have called for expanding the laws because of these benefits. In 2015, President Obama called for the Department of Labor to investigate how California's paid leave system might be adopted by other states. Advocates for fathers argue that paternity leave laws should be expanded to ensure:

More Paid Leave: The lack of pay is the primary reason most fathers do not take time off. Only 10-15% of U.S. employers offer paid leave for fathers, and these are almost exclusively white-collar jobs.

Protection Against Stigma: Even when paid leave is offered, many men do not take advantage of it for fear that they will appear less dedicated to their jobs. Direct or unspoken disapproval from colleagues and superiors can prevent employees from benefiting from leave.

Guaranteed Job-Protection: Adopting policies that make sure fathers can return to their jobs after leave without job loss, demotion or other negative career effects.

Expanded Coverage: Allowing part-time and small-business employees leave access will help expand the benefits of leave to workers not currently covered under federal law.

Your Right to Paid Leave
As society becomes more open to respecting the role of fathers in the home with young children, many states and some individual companies are beginning to offer more generous programs. This has been a relatively new development so the laws are still changing.
Have Questions About Paternity Leave or the FMLA? Get Legal Help
If you have questions about workplace leave under state or federal law or believe that you have been wrongly denied leave or discriminated against because you took leave, consider contacting a family law attorney near you who can help answer your questions and protect your rights.

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Paternity Leave, FMLA, and State Leave Laws - FindLaw

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Most new or expecting fathers wish they could be more involved at the birth or adoption of a child, yet many working dads lack the paternity leave (the time off from work given to new fathers at the birth or adoption of their child) they need to be with their family, while others are offered only unpaid leave.

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1. It lays the groundwork for co-parenting and family stability
2. Kids reap the benefits early on and for life
3. It builds a dad's confidence
4. It supports gender equality in the workplace

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4 Reasons new dads need paternity leave 

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4 Reasons new dads need paternity leave 

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Historically, new dads didn’t have to worry so much about taking paternity leave. Time off after baby was a “new mom thing”. That was the norm Not anymore

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If you live in the U.S., your partner is entitled to the same post-baby leave as you-but most guys aren't getting to take their due time. Here's how to make it happen, plus the surprising ways paternity leave benefits the whole family.

You know when something's simultaneously shocking and obvious? Brace yourself: The Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA), which entitles most new moms to 12 weeks off work within Baby's first year, promises the same time off to dads (and in some cases, same-sex spouses, too). That means your S.O. can be home with you in those first all-absorbing months, or take over when you go back to work-hi, 24 weeks of zero day care.

If paternity leave has never crossed your mind (beyond a few vacation days after the baby arrives), you're not alone. And don't be surprised if your partner's human resources rep hasn't clued him in: 1 in 5 HR professionals in the U.S. is confused about the policy, according to one study from Boston College. Yipes!

Like maternity leave, dad's hiatus is usually unpaid. But if you can swing it (read on to learn how!), the mental and physical benefits paid out to your entire clan will be colossal.

While pregnancy and labor trigger caregiving instincts in moms (thank you, oxytocin!), a father needs quality time with his kiddo for his brain to shift into daddy mode, says Paul Raeburn, author of Do Fathers Matter? What Science Is Telling Us About the Parent We've Overlooked. One study found that tuning into his infant's cries connects pathways in Dad's brain related to social perception, bolstering his ability to forge and maintain relationships (a boon when he returns to work). For the little guy, early time with Pops is linked to better cognitive development. In another study, 6-month-olds who shared regular playtime with their fathers had more advanced vocabularies by age 3 than those who played only with mom, possibly because dads drop bigger words around bub.

For you: Women whose husbands take time off right away are less likely to be depressed three months post-birth, Spanish researchers note. And a 2014 study from the National Academy of Sciences found that having a partner at home boosts Mom's hormone levels of prolactin and oxytocin, stimulating breast milk production and letdown.

A 2012 Swedish law allowed dads to take up to 30 paid days off work in the first year of a child's life-choosing the days to be home based on when Mom needs the support. A recent study on the outcome of this law showed a 26 percent decrease in post-partum anti-anxiety prescriptions in the first six months after moms gave birth. The researchers also found a decrease in hospitalizations, specialist doctor visits and even antibiotic prescriptions. AKA, dad being available was healthier for mom and baby.

Paternity leave can do great things for your marriage, too, as Jim Stokes-Buckles can attest. The Massachusetts father of two took two months off after his first baby. "It gave me a feeling of equal partnership with my wife," he says. "I know I can do anything she can do with regard to the kids."

So, how can you make this magical time happen for your little tribe? Sidestep these four major (yet totally common) concerns using this advice from experts and dads who made it work. We can't promise it'll be easy, but we guarantee it'll be worth it.

We can't afford it.

It's terrible, but true: Women earn only 80.5 cents for every dollar a man does according to data released by the U.S. Census Bureau in September 2017, so going without Papa's paycheck may be a hardship. Add a tot who can set you back $14,700 per year, and it's no wonder that five out of six fathers in the Boston College study said they would take time off only if they were paid at least 70 percent of their salary.

That figure (or more!) doesn't have to be a pipe dream. More than 1 in 3 U.S. employers offers paid maternity leave beyond the amount required by law, up from 1 in 6 earlier this decade, according to new data from the Society for Human Resource Management. That number should continue to rise as more major corporate players improve their policies: Most recently, Microsoft said it will require companies that supply it with subcontractors to give those workers 12 weeks of paid parental leave. These workers will be guaranteed 66 percent of their wages or up to $1,000 a month for three months.

Outside of Silicon Valley, new state-wide regulations are also being put into place. In June 2018, Massachusetts became the sixth state to have a paid family leave law on the books. New parents get up to 12 weeks of paid time off to care for a sick family member or a new baby. Your guy should research benefits at his competitors and use them as leverage to push for similar perks, says Delta Emerson, EVP and chief of staff at Ryan, a tax services firm that instated more flexible parental leave. You can also check your state's laws at NCSL.org (navigate to "Employee Leave" under "Labor and Employment").

Another selling point for your partner to present to his boss: Offering paid paternity leave may improve a company's bottom line. Revenue and employee and client satisfaction all went up when Ryan implemented better work-life policies, while staff turnover decreased, Emerson says. If your guy is wary to advocate for change solo, he can start a fathers' group at the office-about 13 percent of companies surveyed by Boston College had one-to make the case together. Power in numbers!

If work's not budging on money, turn negotiations to time. Since paternity leave is more about bonding than recovering, many dads stagger their unpaid weeks, which may be easier financially than going three straight months sans pay. Or, consider just six weeks of leave for Dad. It'll slash the hit to the family bank account in half while still giving him invaluable hours with your new nugget.

He's worried about work.

When New York Mets second baseman Daniel Murphy missed opening day of the 2014 season to take paternity leave, radio host Mike Francesca ribbed, "You're a major-league baseball player-you can hire a nurse." Um, what?

Sadly, Murphy's not alone. "Men are punished more harshly than women if they take time away from work," says Tom Spiggle, an employment lawyer in Arlington, Va. Sure enough, caregiving fathers experience more mistreatment than their childless peers, finds a study from the University of Toronto.

Ben Eggleston, an auto insurance representative and new dad in Irvine, Calif., took his 12 weeks of FMLA leave to the tune of "friendly teasing from people at work, like 'Must be nice getting all this time off to sit home and relax,'" he says. But even a gentle jab may make a man question his decision. Tell hubs to take a cue from Murphy, who struck back with this one-liner: "Long after they tell me I am not good enough to play baseball anymore, I'll be a husband and a father."

Another problem: Your partner's co-workers may not respect his time off. "I had this romantic idea of paternity leave-that he'd be home with me and we'd swap who got up in the night," says Allison Evans, a new mom in Ohio, whose husband, Dave, took time off when their daughter was born. "But the people he worked with were like, 'You have a baby! Congrats-here's a gift card. Now can you come to this meeting?'" There's also pressure to be online: 45 percent of dads surveyed by Boston College checked email regularly while on leave.

To prevent getting glued to his laptop, your guy should discuss his leave with management as early as possible, Spiggle says. Battle pushback by presenting a list of accomplishments, adds Scott J. Behson, Ph.D., an associate professor at Fairleigh Dickinson University and founder of the blog FathersWorkandFamily.com. Remember, at the end of the day, you're legally entitled to the time!

In the case of requesting extras, such as staggered weeks off, a dad-to-be should define a plan of how he'll meet responsibilities, says Chris Duchesne, VP of global workplace solutions for Care.com: "Focus on measurable goals and the company's needs, not your own. How will this be a win for them?"

But sometimes, a dad's worst enemy is himself-especially if he's passionate about his job. As a surgeon, Dave Evans worked as many as 90 hours a week before his daughter was born. "All of a sudden there's this other more important thing in your life, and it's hard to adjust," he says. To help: Hubs can ask a work buddy to call with big news, so he'll feel connected without spiraling into an email black hole.

We can't agree on when he should take his leave.

You've figured out how to make paternity leave work-congrats! Now the question is when, since FMLA leave can occur anytime in Baby's first year. The optimal strategy, says No Regrets Parenting author Harley Rotbart, M.D., is to divide leave: a couple of weeks at birth, when moms need the most help; a few around three months, when mom usually goes back to work; and the rest between six and nine months, when babies interact more and become even more fun to be around.

You could also try scheduling some overlap. Eggleston's first week of paternity leave was his wife's last. "It cost a little more-we had to put our baby in day care one week sooner than if we had completely divided our leave," he says. "But it meant we could spend time together as a family." Whatever happens, fathers should be there for the first few days after delivery-and you should both resist the urge to invite everyone and their dog over for ogling. "Ideally Mom and Dad have a few days together to just figure it out, have fun and explore how to handle the baby," says Paula Levy, a licensed family therapist in Westport, Conn.

I'm having trouble handing the baby over.

It's normal if the thought of surrendering baby duties, even to your mate, has you breaking into a cold sweat. Behaviorists call it "maternal gatekeeping," and it happens when moms feel subconsciously threatened as caregivers. "I would always be thinking, You're doing this wrong," Allison Evans remembers. "I'd come home and think, That's a sleeper-she shouldn't be wearing that during the day." Resist this urge to nitpick.

"It's really important for mom to encourage dad, rather than insist that there's one right way," Levy says. Reprimanding hubby for using the wrong wipes or some other misdeed that won't actually harm your bambino can make him feel reluctant to pull his weight.

To fight the desire to critique everything your partner is doing (or failing to do!) with Baby, focus on keeping your friendship intact. Levy recommends locking in couple time the way you schedule gym visits: "The greatest gift you can give your kids is a strong marriage."

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Why New Dads Should Take Paternity Leave

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If you live in the U.S., your partner is entitled to the same post-baby leave as you-but most guys aren't getting to take their due time. Here's how to make it happen, plus the surprising ways paternity leave benefits the whole family.

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Should men be allowed to take paternity leave when a baby is born?