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Fatima Solovjova

Going online for the first time

In 2002, at home, I started to learn how to use a PC and the internet. I do remember that it was one of my most exciting experiences because, in the beginning, I could not make heads or tails of it.

The first time, when I used the internet, I opened Yahoo search, instead of Internet Explorer, and typed the keywords. I do not remember what exactly I searched for, but when information came on, I do remember feeling that I had. I was in ninth heaven even waiting for the webpage on screen for me it takes a while.

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My first home in London.

My first home in London was in East Ham, near Brampton park.
My friend helped to find it and sort out some issue regarding tenancy agreement.
It was a lovely property on the first floor. There were two bedrooms, a living room, one bathroom with a toilet and a small kitchen.
First thing what I did when got key in my hands I cleaned all the house. My daughters helped me.
In the beginning, the life in this property was quite good: freshly painted accommodation, a lovely neighbour on the ground floor and quite an area.
After a time my property started the show a real face.
Mould comes out from painted walls, the heating system didn't work properly, but the worst thing happened to me when my neighbour changest.
A new couple, who lived on the ground floor argued to much, drunk and smoked weed. A lot of time police was involved to sort out problems with them. Most funny is that police didn't do anything to sort out the problem, they closed eyes in existing problem and gave for my family advice - "try to find other property and move from this house". It was the first time in this country when I become disappointed in police and it leads to losing trust in the police in future as well.
Finally, for our health and safety, we decided to change the house. But till now I feel sorry for people who come in this property after us. They will find " lovely" neighbour, freshly painted walls to cover mouldy places and disinterested landlord.

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Fatima S
At this extraordinary time when everybody has to stay at home, we are facing big challenges.
During the lockdown, some people's lives are going slower than before and they are really happy about that. They are having more time for rest, EW for learning, for family and additional time for indoor hobbies.
On WW-pre the other hand, they are forced WW to decrease their movement and their lifestyle led to approach the kitchen more often then they need [CONFUSED]. Sorry, but we will not speak here about exercises and workouts. Yes, it's good for health, but in fact, most of the people don't do that and a lot of lockdown victims become lazy and overweight. All these negative things can affect the immune system and particularly their mental well-being.
In my opinion, PUN/MWs it is extremely important to find a balance between rest and "stomach needs" and of course to stay WF in good health physically and mentally.
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COMMENTS
Really well done. This is a well written piece which is purposeful and has humour. It is clear. There are some very good grammar constructions well controlled.  Do this under exam conditions.
CORRECTED COPY
ACCURACY 5
EFFECTIVENESS 5
[TEACHER MARKING TIME -DRAFT- 5 MINS]

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Fatima Sol*

I am finding that studying during lockdown is really beneficial to me.
I am not rushing to class after work in the mornings by bus or train. Life is going differently during the last weeks. I am connecting to ART a zoom class every Tuesday and Friday every week. I am doing it with huge joy. I am noticing that online classes are much productive. They have less WF no essential talks and distractions. I have to mention that PRE for my independent study a time I am changing as well. I am studying on time, PUN which is WW best to me. Before WW lockdown I can't do that. I was tired and overwhelmed of my duties to family, work and society and it affected my health too. During the lockdown, I am having plenty of rest and I am sure my individual study is going in positive progression.
Lockdown is adding in my life flexibility and productivity.
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COMMENTS
I am so pleased with this clear and interestingly expressed piece of work. It is full of reflections and opinions with some humour too. Well done Fatima.
ACCURACY 4
EFFECTIVENESS 5

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My first home in London was in East Ham, near Brampton Park.[CAP]
My friend helped to find it and sort out some issues [NUM] regarding [ART]a tenancy agreement.
It was a lovely property on the first floor. There were two bedrooms, a living room, one bathroom with a toilet and a small kitchen.
[ART] The first thing which [WW] I did when I [MW-PRO] received the key in my hands -[MW-V] I cleaned all the house. My daughters helped me.
In the beginning, our[EW-ART] life in this property was quite good: freshly painted accommodation, a lovely neighbour on the ground floor and quiet [SP] area.
After a time my property started to WW "show" its [WW-PRO] real face.
Mould came [VT] out on [PRE] painted walls, the heating system didn't work properly, but the worst thing happened to me when my neighbour moved.. [WW- VT]😜😛😘
A new couple, who lived on the ground floor argued too[SP] much, [P UN-CON] drunk and smoked weed. A lot of time [ART]the police have been [SVA] involved to sort out problems with them. [ART] The funniest thing[MW] is that ART]the police didn't do anything to sort out the problem.[PUN]
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COMMENTS
Well done Fatima, You have made an interesting description of what turned out to be a nightmare rather than a dream home. I have only marked the first part as I had asked for two paragraphs only. When you have done the corrections I shall mark the rest of it.
CORRECTED GRADE
Accuracy: 4.5
Effectiveness: 5