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Coaching has quickly become one of the most popular forms of professional development in North American schools. More and more, coaches are partnering with teachers to improve instruction to increase student achievement and well-being, without being evaluative or directive.

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Feedback has become completely integrated into all aspects of our lives. We go to a restaurant and give feedback after our meal. We take a class and give feedback for our teacher. We can even attend meetings and give feedback on how the meeting went. And of course, we give feedback on our how our managers are leading and how our team members are performing.

So what's the problem? Well, it turns out that people don't like feedback. When someone turns to you and says "I am going to give you some feedback right now," your brain certainly doesn't react with openness and enthusiasm. Your brain reacts with stress. People don't want feedback; they want attention. People don't want feedback; they want attention. Click To Tweet

The world of work is no different; team members are not looking for feedback from their team leaders, they're looking for attention. And yes, that attention can and should be focused on how to help the team member get better - but that's a far cry from feedback. That's coaching.

Imagine that your employee, the team member, is standing on one side of a fence. The difference between feedback and coaching lies on what side of the fence you, the team leader, are on. If you're giving them feedback, it's like standing on the opposite side of the fence, throwing a grenade over it, and covering your ears and running away after the damage is done. Hey, you've given them their feedback, now it's their job to perform better, right?

Wrong.

Team members don't want that. No one wants that. We all want the team leader to come to our side of the fence, look at the world from where we're standing, and tell us how to adjust from where we are to get better.

If you're going to give feedback, it has to come from a place of coaching. Nobody wants feedback, but everyone would appreciate being coached on how to course-correct to perform better. And maybe you want to give feedback, but you will never get the outcomes from it that you're looking for. Unless, of course, making your team member defensive is your desired outcome.

Your employees aren't asking you to tell them where they stand. They're asking you to tell them how to get better.
Clip courtesy of the 2017 Global Leadership Summit.

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Coaching vs. Feedback Thanks for taking the first step towards bringing Talent Activation to your organization! Please enter your information and select the checkbox below to receive new episodes from the blog directly to your inbox. Feedback has become completely integrated into all aspects of our lives.

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Everything we do is grounded in rich and rigorous research. Marcus Buckingham is the world's leading authority on turning talent into performance, and the research speaks for itself. Take a look.

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Perhaps this is a matter of semantics; but in my leadership consulting, I help managers identify the following nuances between coaching and feedback.

In the following discussion, 'feedback' refers chiefly to corrective or "negative" feedback. Appreciative or "positive" feedback in the form of honest praises, approvals, and compliments are just as essential as corrective feedback. As I've written in previous articles, great managers communicate corrective feedback and appreciative feedback distinctly instead of interspersing them in the form of "feedback sandwiches."

Differences between Coaching and Feedback

Coaching is preparative. Feedback is corrective.

Coaching focuses on possibilities. Feedback focuses on adjustment.

Coaching is about future behavior. Feedback is about past (and current) behavior.

Coaching is inquiry-oriented. Feedback is scrutiny-oriented.

Coaching stems from developmental needs. Feedback stems from judgmental needs.

Coaching is about assisting employees reach their goals for the future. Feedback is about helping employees understand what prevents them from reaching their current goals.

Coaching is about advocating optimal performance. Feedback is about reinforcing appropriate behavior.

Coaching is more about helping employees grow. Feedback is more about helping employees not fail. (Both coaching and feedback are about helping employees succeed.)

Coaching guides employees in the direction that suits them best. Feedback ensures that employees uphold espoused values and meet expectations.

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The Difference between Coaching and Feedback

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Perhaps this is a matter of semantics; but in my leadership consulting, I help managers identify the following nuances between coaching and feedback. In the following discussion, 'feedback' refers chiefly to corrective or "negative" feedback. Appreciative or "positive" feedback in the form of honest praises, approvals, and compliments are just as essential as corrective feedback.