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A Message from a Black Mom to Her Son Reflection

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A Message from a Black Mom to Her Son Reflection

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This story made me feel very emotional. I recently discussed Martin Luther King Jr. with my second grade students, and explained to them that while a lot has changed in this country since the Civil Rights Movement in terms of equality, there is still a very long way to go. One student of color asked, “no offense, but are you white?” and it reminded me that racism and other types of hatred are taught, and it is partly my responsibility to teach my students to think the opposite. I have felt out of place before as a woman, but as a white person, I have not experienced racism.

I think very similarly to the mother in this story, especially with the sentiment that it’s so important to get to know children for who they are and believe in them, and love them. That is why I wanted to become a teacher, and even on hard days, I do my best to uphold that way of thinking.

There is still racism embedded into the US education system, where more urban and diverse school districts receive less funding than their suburban, white counterparts. As a white teacher in a Title I school with a majority population of non-white students, I have experienced parents of black children struggling with the recommendation of special education, or trusting that their white teachers are going to treat them equitably. The school to prison pipeline in the US education system has set up black students to fail, and it runs very deep. The biases, unconscious or not, are not something that all teachers are willing to look at, and inevitably they end up adding to the stigma and criminalization of black children. It is of the utmost importance that I work against my unconscious biases, and reduce the stigma.

I have read many articles and excerpts about experiences of black families and parents, and some novels that highlight racism in general, like “Such a Fun Age” and “The Hate U Give”.

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1. How did this story make you feel? When have you felt that way in you real life?

I felt a great deal of sadness for the injustices this mother felt and saw during her schooling and her desire for her son to have a different schooling experience. I, myself, have not experienced any of the injustices that black and brown children experience every day as they go to school. I have, however, experienced it as the mother of a black daughter. This story is a mirror for me because my daughter does have this experience when she goes to school each day. As the student of a predominantly white school, she has been unjustly searched and threatened by administration.

2. How alike or different are you from the mother in this story?

I am like this mother in many ways. While white privilege has allowed me to escape the inequities of society, I feel the desire for my daughter to have the same schooling experience I had.

3. What other articles or stories have you read with a similar message or theme?

I have read many, many stories about racism. A few of the novels include, "I am Ruby Bridges", "The Kite Runner", "Small Great Things", "Dear Martin", "The Hate You Give", just to name a few and countless articles.

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1)How did this story make you feel? When have you felt that way in your real life?

In this story it made me feel many different emotions, the main emotion that I felt was the one of sadness. This is because of what she had to go through when she was going to school, when she was younger she got bussed to school through white neighborhoods. She had to worry about what was going on. Now that she is older she has to worry about her children going through the same thing. I do not believe that I have ever felt this way, I was never put into a position where I had to change the way of living to go somewhere else.

2)How alike or different are you from the mother in this story?

I am not sure if I am alike or different from the mother, I know for a fact that I do not need to go through the same struggles as what she had to go through. So in all I feel like I am probably different from the mother.

3)What other articles or stories have you read with a similar message or theme?

I can not remember if there are any other readings that are similar to the message of this article. In all there is probably not a lot of articles that I have read that follows along with this theme.

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THIS IS MY GLOBAL FEEDBACK FOR THIS ACTIVITY... Check it out! 

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THIS IS MY GLOBAL FEEDBACK FOR THIS ACTIVITY... Check it out! 

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After reading this story, it made me feel a variety of different ways. First, I felt extremely sorry for the mother, not only because of the experiences she had to go through, but also because she had to worry about her son experiencing the same things. Im not sure there can be a more helpless feeling than knowing your child is being treated improperly for something completely out of their control, and not being able to do anything about it. However, the story also made me feel hopeful that we are, and will continue to make progress in society to ensure people do not continue to have experiences like this anymore. I have not had many, if any instances in my life where I was put in a position to feel this way. Because of this, I want to do everything in my power as a future teacher to ensure that as little people as possible experience something like this.

I believe I am like the mother in this story as I am willing to live with something that has happened to me as long as I can ensure it does not happen to the people I care about. If me having to experience something negative can give me the ability to ensure someone else does not go through the same thing, I am happy to be the one to experience it.

Finally, I have not read ant other articles or stories that have a similar message or theme.

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1. How did this story make you feel? When have you felt that way in your real life?

While reading this story, I felt deeply sad for the mother and her experiences with discrimination and misconceptions in education that she had to face. This story was very eye opening to the various realities and experiences individuals can have within an educational space, and that these experiences are crucial to take into account as an educator to create an inclusive and safe learning environment for all. I have been privileged enough to not feel like this many times in my own education journey. For most of my academic career, I have felt respected and validated in my performance as a student. However, a few instances have occurred in my college level science courses, mostly with my peers, where my ability to perform well in class was questioned based on me being a woman. In these instances, male classmates of mine would continuously look for errors in my work during study groups and question the accuracy of information I would present. This was in stark contrast to how these same individuals would respond when their male peers would provide suggestions or answers to questions and receive no push back or continuous investigation to prove them wrong.

2. How alike or different are you from the mother in this story?

With regard to educational experience, I am very fortunate to not have had to face similar struggles as the mother from this story. However, when looking at the hopes the mother has for her child, I feel as though we are very similar. I hope that as an educator, I can help create a learning environment where all students from various backgrounds feel seen and validated. I hope that all of my students feel inspired and valued within the classroom and that their abilities and accomplishments are celebrated. Additionally, as an educator, it is my responsibility and desire to prevent racial preconceptions and misconceptions within the educational setting, and provide an equal opportunity to learn for all.

3. What other articles or stories have you read with a similar message or theme?

At this time, I can not think of any stories or articles that I have read with a similar message or theme; however, I am excited to continue to learn from this course and engage with material similar to this to educate myself more on this topic.

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1. How did this story make you feel? When have you felt that way in real life?

1. This story really opened my eyes to the different realities that people (especially children in schools) have to deal with every day. My experience in schools growing up could be very similar to someone else, or it could be vastly different. It's these types of articles that really give me an awareness of those different experiences. One time when I felt this way in real life was when I was reading with a first grade student last year. I had worked with her class for a few days in a row, and she had been giving the teacher and me a hard time with behavioral issues and difficulty staying on task. As we were reading out in the hallway, she randomly paused and said, "Can I tell you something?" I replied, "Sure, what is it?" And she said, "I'm getting adopted soon and I'm very excited!" In that moment my eyes opened up to see her world in a whole different way. Suddenly her behavior from that week made total sense, and I tried to corral her excitement about the adoption and funnel it towards the tasks we were doing in school.

2. How alike or different are you from the mother in this story?

1. With regards to our schooling experience, we were very different. I was fortunate growing up to never really feel uncomfortable in school or like I didn't belong. Teachers were rarely surprised when I performed well, and they didn't overlook me. I never thought much of it in the moment, but reflecting on it now I can see how lucky I was. That being said, I do hope that when I eventually become a parent, I will share the desire for my child to be given every possible opportunity and be surrounded by people who want to see them succeed.

3. What other articles or stories have you read with a similar message or theme?

1. I honestly haven't read many articles on this topic, so none are coming to mind at the moment. That being said, I feel it is so valuable to hear about others' experiences, so I'm hoping to do more reading like this throughout this course!

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1. How did this story make you feel? When have you felt that way in your real life? This story made me feel a mixture of sad and angry, but hopeful at the same time. Sad because this has been and is the reality for most black students. Angry because of how the teachers spoke to/about the child, “one of the good ones” or crushing their dreams of being a musician. Hopeful because with every new generation of teachers, we have a chance to change this on the frontlines of education.

2. How alike or different are you from the mother in this story? I hope that I am alike in the sense of wanting to break the systems that allows for this behavior. My school is very diverse, and I try to be conscious of each student’s individuality and treat all the students equally regardless of race, sex, religion, etc. Different in the sense that this is something that I have never had to personally endure. As a white student growing up in a majority white school in 90s, this type of racial stereotyping was not directed towards me.

3. What other articles or stories have you read with a similar message or theme? I remember reading an article about how school districts in Baltimore have the extremely low reading and math scores. 77% of the students at one high school are reading on an elementary school level (some students kindergarten to 2nd grade reading levels). These school districts are majority students are non-white (the high school they used as an example was 94% non-white). It makes me wonder about how negatively the education systems are affecting Black and Hispanic students and if there is anything being done to combat this. If an entire major city in the US cannot provide a proper education to these children, I am scared to look at what smaller, more rural and poorer areas look like.

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This story made me feel quite sad, as I never want any of my students to feel the way that the mom felt in this story, or feel the fears that she has for her child in his future education.  My hope is that schools are changing today, as diversity increases, to become more inclusive learning settings, but I also know that there is more work to be done.  I have felt very similar ways in my life as someone who is Jewish.  I was lucky to grow up in a community with a lot of Jewish people, but once I went to Wisconsin for college, I experienced cruel antisemitism from classmates in my dorm.  I also feel this way currently in the school where I work, as I am the only Jewish person in the whole school, and the district does not give off for the high holy days or acknowledge my holidays like those of other religions, and a staff member also made a joke to me about Hamas, with another telling me how terrible it is what Israel is doing and that they are committing genocide after seeing my Jewish necklace.

In some way, I am quite alike the mother in this story, as I also sometimes fear for the safety of my future children in school.  I hope that they are not discriminated against for their religion, and experience acceptance by their peers and teachers.  I want my children to always be proud of their heritage and never feel invisible or valued less than others.

I have done a great deal of reading on the Holocaust, and many of the victim’s stories about growing discrimination before/during the war unfortunately portray the same message.   I also see some similarities with stories like To Kill a Mockingbird or The Day You Begin, which is a book about the diverse school experience that I heard read to children at my internship.  I hope to use stories such as these to instill a sense of understanding and acceptance in my students.

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I felt really bad for the mother in this story, she had to endure made-up, racial preconceptions that discriminated against her and assumed incompetence. It is sad that she has the same worries for her son going through school and although some things have changed since she was in school, her concerns are very real and there are people who still have these racial biases.

I have had the privilege to not experience these feelings often but I have felt this way in a couple of STEM courses I took in undergrad. My professors were often men who assumed incompetence because I am not masculine presenting. I was once called “stupid” by my computer science professor, was told to not go into coding, and he would often comment on how I was unteachable and a bad listener. This professor always insisted that women had to be paired with a man for his projects and despite my ability to do the work, he would often make comments about how well my partner was doing compared to me, it got to the point where other men in the class would stand up for the women but it also stopped me from taking any other coding courses at my college. Being a feminine presenting person in STEM I felt I had to work harder to show the depth of my knowledge and capabilities, which nobody should have to do. I was really lucky to have other people in that class who recognized the misogyny and tried to do something about it, especially since we were adults it was easier to take up space and push back against the power dynamic he was trying to foster. Unlike the mother throughout this story, she was a child when she was being discriminated against and made to believe that she was different and less than because of her skin color. She was not in a position where she could challenge the adults who were making her feel incompetent and different and now that she is a mother she is doing what she can to challenge injustice and discrimination for her child, in hopes that he will have a better experience in school.

I recently started reading the book, This Bridge Called My Back by Cherríe Moraga and Gloria Anzaldúa, which is a collection of writings by radical women of color. Many of the essays discuss real-life experiences where the women were discriminated against and highlights the struggles they faced due to their marginalized identities. The collection delves into the intersectionality of identities and how they are ingrained in the systemic oppression and liberation of women of color. So many of the stories are heart-wrenching, it is a powerful read that also offers strategies to transform political practices through activism and strengthening coalitions.

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This story made me feel sad as it went into the struggles that black students experience everyday. It is disappointing to see that people still have these views and biases. I hope as time goes on people will become more educated and form new and inclusive views of their students.

I have never had an experience like the mother in the story but I think it is a shame that students have these experiences. As a teacher I am determined to make sure none of my students feel this way in my classroom.

I would say that I am like the mother in this story because I want what is best for all my students. I want to see them grow and succeed. I really liked her statement “She saw something in me and encouraged me to develop my passion.” This is something I value as a teacher and plan on incorporating for all my students in my classroom.

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After reading this story, I felt sad in the sense that the mom felt invisible in the school that she attended. I felt as though no child should attend school feeling as though they don't fit in with the other students or feel discriminated against. I hope all future teachers and current will accept all students for who they are and help them to reach their full potentials.

I grew up in a primarily White town and went to public schools and I was typically one of the only Asian students in my classrooms. There wasn't much diversity in the school and town and I feel as though that many times I felt as though I didn't look the same as everyone else and felt different.

The mother in the story wants the best for her child and is hoping that her child doesn't experience the same things as the mother. I am similar in the sense that if I had a child of my own I would want the best for my child and for them to never feel invisible or like they don't have the same experiences as others

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After reading this story I felt as though no child should have to feel this way going to school.I felt sad and as though someone should have helped these children/students. I think what if my child faced these challenges everyday going to school, how would I feel? How would they feel? My thoughts ran in the direction that society should not have the power to make anyone feel that way.

In all honesty I can not remember a time in my life where I have ever felt that way but I know that there are people that are made to feel this way often.  I feel as though I would feel lost and helpless and not know how to help myself or others in that situation.  I imagine that if I have felt that way in one point of my life I would want to be near or surround myself with people who are in the same situation as I am so we can figure out a solution to the problem and maybe not feel so alone in the situation.

The mother in the story wants what is best for her child just as any mother would. This mother is hoping and praying that her child does not have to face the same adversity and prejudice that she did while she was growing up and in school. I think any mother in this situation would want the same thing this mother wants for her child. No mother wants their child to feel as though they are invisible or looked at just because they have different colored skin.