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The Rubric can be completed separately in five sections as you work through each Focus Area, or all five sections can be completed together for a full implementation review. After completing the rubric, you can set goals and create a plan.

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Students share experience being labeled gifted and talented.

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Many educators work hard to make students feel that the classroom is a place of learning, and that means making mistakes, rethinking strategies, and learning from setbacks. Based on Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck's work on growth mindset, teachers encourage students to see their intelligence as something malleable, that changes and grows, not a fixed asset assigned at birth. Despite the popularity of these ideas in education, there are still systemic practices and requirements that undermine the message at every turn.

Stanford education professor Jo Boaler has been one of the most outspoken advocates of growth mindset, particularly in math education, where students often have fixed mindsets about their abilities. Boaler says she has seen the damage in adults and students who believe they don't have "math brains" or that they'll never be good at math. To counteract these negative messages, Boaler encourages teachers to use open-ended, visual math tasks, and to mix content with mindset messages. She's even created a website, YouCubed, with videos, research, and classroom activities to help teachers get started.

Boaler teaches Stanford students, high achievers who often felt they had to be perfect to get into one of the most selective universities in the country. Through personal conversations with her students, Boaler began to see how being labeled "gifted" or "smart" as children stunted even these bright and successful young people. When growth mindset was still a fairly new concept in the education world, many teachers of gifted children saw its potential with that population, who often feel they've gained a special status for being smart. It's not uncommon for gifted students to fear failure more than other students because they feel they have more to lose.

Boaler made a short video with Citizen Film of Stanford students reflecting on how they were labeled as students. It's hard to feel sorry for Stanford students, many of whom have had amazing opportunities not offered to peers precisely because someone recognized them as smart, but their experiences do call into question the practice of labeling in the first place.

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Students Share The Downside Of Being Labeled 'Gifted' | KQED

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Many educators work hard to make students feel that the classroom is a place of learning, and that means making mistakes, rethinking strategies, and learning from setbacks. Based on Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck's work on growth mindset, teachers encourage students to see their intelligence as something malleable, that changes and grows, not a fixed asset assigned at birth.

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Student account

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A co-valedictorian for West Aurora High School's Class of 2018 is asking the school board to end the valedictorian system because it causes "unhealthy pressure" on students.

The valedictorian and salutatorian system honors the two graduating seniors with the highest grade point averages.

Sofia Partida, who is also a student member of the board, asked the board to end the system.

"It causes extreme pressure early on, not just in your junior and senior years but even starting in middle school years," Partida said. "There's this idealization of being valedictorian which causes unhealthy pressure. It's important to push yourself but only to a healthy extent."

Partida said beyond the pressure students feel, the status of valedictorian isn't a true depiction of the academic success of a student.

"I don't look at people in my class and think that I worked harder than them. I look around and feel like everyone worked as hard if not harder than I did," she told board members.

Partida said the pressure of working toward valedictorian and salutatorian is compounded once "word gets around" at home and school about the students selected for the honors.

"It's a lot of weight to bear," she said.

She said the status does not necessarily impact a student's chances to get into the college of their choice.

"It doesn't impact your college experience or really your future at all. The kids who persevere through their whole high school careers - take honors classes and stay up late to get everything done - are still going to get into good schools and have the motivation to be successful," she said.

"This is more about giving students more liberation in their senior year and not so much stress over something that doesn't have so much effect on your life anyway," she said.

School Board member Allyson Herget said the topic of doing away with the valedictorian system has been talked about over the years.

"Maybe we can start really doing something more about it. Getting some more students involved, getting input from different groups in the community. I know other districts have stopped the practice of valedictorian and salutatorian," Herget said.

Some districts in the area have went away from the valedictorian system to the Latin Honor System, which honors the top 10 percent to 20 percent of a graduating class based on grades.

She said the board is willing to look at a change to the current system at West Aurora.

"It could be something that has served its purpose and now it is time to move on," Herget said.
Linda Girardi is a freelance reporter for The Beacon-News.

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West Aurora asked to change valedictorian system due to 'unhealthy pressure' on students

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A co-valedictorian for West Aurora High School's Class of 2018 is asking the school board to end the valedictorian system because it causes "unhealthy pressure" on students. The valedictorian and salutatorian system honors the two graduating seniors with the highest grade point averages.

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Article with link the book with scientific research

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Why valedictorians rarely become rich and famous - and the average millionaire's college GPA was 2.9 Why your good grades won't help you change the world
These are just a sampling of some of the articles published after Eric Barker released his book, Barking Up the Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong.

As stated in the book:

"There is little debate that high school success predicted college success. Nearly 90 percent [of valedictorians followed in one study] are now in professional careers with 40 percent in the highest tier jobs. They are reliable, consistent, and well-adjusted, and by all measures the majority have good lives. But how many of these number-one high school performers go on to change the world, run the world, or impress the world? The answer seems to be clear; zero."

Before looking at what the research showed, it's worth questioning some of these working assumptions. First, much of the research cited in the book is from one study released over 20 years ago. Second, is it reasonable to use "changing the world, running the world, or impressing the world" as the benchmark for valedictorian success? Aren't they putting enough pressure on themselves even as teenagers? And finally, maybe we shouldn't be quite so dismissive of people who are reliable, consistent, well-adjusted, successful, and happy. Those sound like pretty good outcomes to me.

But the book does raise some interesting points about exactly what's required of a student to become a valedictorian, and just how those traits do and do not translate to the real world.

Barker lays out two primary reasons for his claims that valedictorians don't reach the same top-of-the-class success in life after college.

First, schools reward students who consistently do what they are told. They're told that earning top grades in rigorous classes is the most important factor in college admissions. They're told that rising to the very top of their class is a noble pursuit. And while it may not be stated explicitly, I imagine they receive consistent messages that doing these things will have a far-reaching impact on their likelihood of success long past the release of their grades this semester. It's not surprising that high-achieving kids will pursue the very achievements defined by the adults who supposedly know what we're doing.

And second, Barker points out that school rewards the student who is a generalist and can earn A's in every subject, rather than the student who has a true passion or expertise that dominates their time. That seems like a reasonable point to me. If you want to be a valedictorian, you can't get so swept up in your love of playing the cello or learning karate or reading books that it gets in the way of earning top grades. Even an academic passion can't really dominate your time. No matter how much you may want to dive in and learn even more about European history or Shakespearian plays or calculus, the pressures of your other classes-and your commitment to earning A's in all of them-dictate exactly how much time you can afford to spend on any one interest.

So, what's a smart, reasonable reaction for a student at or near the top of the class who might read this study and wonder if all their time and effort are worth it?

First, students should never discount the value of the traits required to earn top grades. You've got to be goal-oriented. You have to work hard. You have to be disciplined, focused, and able to manage a reasonable amount of stress. Those are good qualities to have no matter what your measure of success now or later might be. Those traits, much more so than whether or not your GPA stays perfect, are what will ultimately have the most influence over your future success. The right behaviors are a lot more important than the specifics of the outcomes.

But it's also important to occasionally take stock in your personal fulfillment, engagement and happiness. While you're earning these top grades, make sure you also regularly consider:

Do you have a favorite subject?

Do you have a favorite teacher?

Do you get enough sleep to function?

Do you have good relationships with your family and friends?

If asked to name three positive things that happened to you yesterday, could you do it?

Do you generally wake up looking forward to the day?

Can you name at least one subject you really wish you could learn a lot more about (doesn't have to be academic)?

Do you regularly enjoy activities or hobbies that have nothing to do with getting into college?

Are you excited about the opportunities that are waiting for you in college?

Have you had at least one good laugh in the last week?

If you regularly consider those questions (or others like it) and find you're responding with too many no's, it's worth considering the extent to which your pursuit of all A's, all-the-time, is responsible.

Extremes are rarely a healthy, responsible, sustainable path. I wouldn't recommend that a student blow off school entirely so they can pursue their love of video games any more than I would endorse a student whose pursuit of a perfect GPA has left them anxious, sleepless, and depressed.

But if you make the laudable decision to spend the time and energy required to get top grades, be thoughtful about exactly why you're doing it. You're better and smarter than "everybody told me to."

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What happens to high school valedictorians?

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Why valedictorians rarely become rich and famous - and the average millionaire's college GPA was 2.9 Why your good grades won't help you change the world These are just a sampling of some of the articles published after Eric Barker released his book, Barking Up the Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong.

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UCLA Mindfulness Awareness Research Center

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UCLA Mindfulness Awareness Research Center

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The Mindful Awareness Research Center (MARC) is a partner of the Norman Cousins Center for Psychoneuroimmunology within the Jane and Terry Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior at UCLA.

The mission of the Mindful Awareness Research Center (MARC) is to disseminate mindful awareness across the lifespan through education and research.

This class lays the foundation for students to understand basic principles of mindfulness, develop a personal meditation practice, and to apply the principles in their daily life on an ongoing basis.

MARC Offices Winter Closure

The MARC offices will be closed from December 19, 2020 to January 3, 2021. During this time, new pre-recorded class starts will be postponed to begin on January 4, 2021.

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UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center, Los Angeles, CA

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The Mindful Awareness Research Center (MARC) is a partner of the Norman Cousins Center for Psychoneuroimmunology within the Jane and Terry Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior at UCLA. The mission of the Mindful Awareness Research Center (MARC) is to disseminate mindful awareness across the lifespan through education and research.

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**Great links within this article to other sites with professional information**

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The animated movie " Inside Out " tells the story of a young girl, Riley, who has to leave her familiar Midwest life behind when her family moves to San Francisco.

Characters depict her primary emotions - Joy, Fear, Anger, Disgust and Sadness - and the inner conflicts they cause her, as well as her parents.

[See more about the movie on the imdb page for Inside Out.]

[Inside Out photo from Facebook.]

The movie was named "Best Animated Feature" at the 2016 Oscars.

[The clip in my video above is from the Inside Out Trailer 2 UK - Official Disney Pixar.]

In her review for Counseling Today magazine, Erin Shifflett writes:

"A person's mind is a mysterious labyrinth of thoughts, feelings, memories, ideas and compulsions; the mind of a young girl is likely even more complex.

"Disney-Pixar's latest animated offering, Inside Out, bravely delves into that intricate world in a way that effectively captures the nuances of the way people feel and think-and maybe helps them understand why they act the way they do sometimes.

"Developed with the guidance of University of California, Berkeley psychologist Dacher Keltner, the film tells the tale of Riley, an 11-year old whose family relocates from Minnesota to San Francisco.

"Through the move, Riley loses her friends and beloved hockey team and is forced to transition to a place where pizza is served with broccoli as a topping and the cool girls in school wear eye shadow, much to Riley's surprise."

Shifflett describes the role of the "five emotions operating at Headquarters (Riley's brain): Joy, Sadness, Disgust, Fear and Anger. ...

"The importance of Sadness and, indeed, the other less pleasant emotions such as Fear, Disgust and Anger, is highlighted multiple times throughout the film when their roles and functions are explained."

From Emotion, personified: What "Inside Out" gets right about mental health By Erin Shifflett June 25, 2015.

[Image from Screen Rant review.]

Also see related article Counseling goes to the movies By Bethany Bray
"Movies can be a hit-the-nail-on-the-head portrayal of life, including mental health struggles and relationship problems that counselors hear about on a daily basis."

Inside Out was named "Best Animated Feature" at the 2016 Academy Awards.

Producer and director Pete Docter said in his acceptance speech:

"This film was really born from watching our kids grow up, which is not easy!

"Anyone out there who's in junior high, high school, working it out, suffering - there are days you're going to feel sad. You're going to feel angry. You're going to feel scared. That's nothing you can choose.

"But you can make stuff. Make films. Draw. Write. It will make a world of difference."

From Inside Out Wins Best Animated Feature, ABC.

Inside Out (Blu-ray/DVD Combo Pack + Digital Copy)

~ ~ ~

Psychologist Dacher Keltner researches how emotions impact our lives.

See quotes and video in my article Dacher Keltner on positive emotion and living a good life.

One of his books: Understanding Emotions by Dacher Keltner, Keith Oatley, Jennifer M. Jenkins.

~ ~

Related articles and resources:

Facebook / Emotional Health and Creativity.

Emotional Intelligence To Be Creative.
Emotions both enhance and impair higher cognition
Morty Lefkoe on how our strong feelings get conditioned - What causes anxiety and other negative emotions can result from the meaning we unconsciously attribute to events in life. And meaning can be changed. Morty Lefkoe, an expert on changing limiting beliefs, explains how classical conditioning can work against our emotional stability.

Creative Expression and Healing
Creative expression can transform our painful reactions to traumatic or difficult experiences, providing a way to give voice to painful feelings. Charlize Theron is an example...

Healing and art: Helping our emotional health through creative expression
In her article Creativity, the Arts, and Madness, Maureen Neihart, Psy.D. notes, "There are numerous examples of artists who used their work to save their minds. For example, Anne Sexton..."

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Programs, books, articles and sites to improve your emotional wellbeing.

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Inside Out and Emotional Health | The Creative Mind

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The animated movie " Inside Out " tells the story of a young girl, Riley, who has to leave her familiar Midwest life behind when her family moves to San Francisco. Characters depict her primary emotions - Joy, Fear, Anger, Disgust and Sadness - and the inner conflicts they cause her, as well as her parents.

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Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning

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A few ways to help build social-emotional intelligence.

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We're in the midst of a historical first. The first generation of children raised entirely on smartphones, the iGeneration, is facing a skyrocketing mental illness rate, and studies suggest that too much screen time is to blame. In fact, suicide in teenage girls is the highest that it's been in over 40 years. What can we do to protect our children? Science tells us that children and teens with high EQ have lower rates of mental illness, so the answer is to improve emotional intelligence ... but that's not always easy when kids are glued to a screen.

Here's how to improve emotional intelligence in your teenager, regardless of her screen addiction:

#1: Establish Routines for Unplugged Time

Implement a household-wide (this includes the adults!) routine for going unplugged. Banning smartphones entirely is impractical, especially when they're such a key part of communication these days, but you can limit screen time by scheduling routines together so everyone gets a break from scrolling through social media.

For instance, try limiting phone use during family time, whether that means watching TV together or going out for mini golf. You can also limit phone use during homework time, though this isn't necessarily a household-wide approach. It's important that you make an effort to minimize screen time yourself, so your teen doesn't feel like he's being unfairly singled out.

#2: Counter-Balance Tech Time

Smartphone time can naturally balance itself out when you implement other activities into your child's routine. Talk to her about her interests, and help her get involved in clubs, classes, or teams that she wants to try. Every hour that she plays lacrosse or volunteers at an animal shelter is an hour that she's not looking at her phone, and instead connecting with the world and building emotional intelligence via social exposure.

#3: Promote Healthy Living Habits

You can't have emotional health without bodily health, and it's all too common for teenagers to sacrifice sleep and food for smartphone time.

Try to discourage smartphone use at bedtime in favor of relaxing activities, such as reading, meditating, or using Headspace. At the dinner table, keep your phone turned off and ask that your child does the same, so you can focus on eating mindfully instead of eating while staring at a screen.

When he's fully rested and properly nourished, his brain is in a better place to make and foster emotional connections and related skills, such as self-management and emotional regulation.

#4: Model EQ

The best way to teach EQ is to model it, and modeling it means practicing it yourself. Talk to your kids about the importance of learning EQ subskills such as empathy and mindfulness, and then let them see it in action. You can start by:

Using smart conflict resolution, such as "I feel" statements.

Communicating assertively and clearly, e.g. when you have a disagreement with your child over the level of cleanliness in her room, don't get frustrated and walk away; instead, negotiate a cleaning schedule with her.

Practicing positive mirroring by pointing out strengths and gifts, such as his thoughtfulness or her ability to listen empathetically.

Expressing compassion and empathy for others, both in person and while watching TV or movies together.

If you have a teenager who's glued to a screen, it's time to start practicing and supporting EQ at home, and hopefully counter-balance the mental health effects of excessive smartphone time. However, it doesn't make sense to stop at home when teenagers spend the majority of each day at school. It's clear that there's a need for social and emotional learning programs at schools, so our children know how to improve emotional intelligence before they become victim to excessive screen time. Call your school district today; give your child the start he deserves.

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The iGeneration: How to Improve Emotional Intelligence in Screen-Addicted Teenagers

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We're in the midst of a historical first. The first generation of children raised entirely on smartphones, the iGeneration, is facing a skyrocketing mental illness rate, and studies suggest that too much screen time is to blame. In fact, suicide in teenage girls is the highest that it's been in over 40 years.

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Social and emotional learning (SEL) equips students for 21st century jobs.

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Don&#x27;t get left on the shelf ... brush up on your collaboration, communication and problem-solving skills Image: REUTERS/Eric Gaillard

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Ten 21st-century Skills Every Student Needs

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Skills required in the 21st-century for students are quite different from the past. Check out 10 skills that a student should have in the 21st-century.

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Advancing the science and practice of character development so that all students can reach their full potential

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Lesson Activities for handling and recognizing different emotions. 

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Lesson Activities for handling and recognizing different emotions. 

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Does a great job describing the importance of Social Emotional Intelligence.

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Daniel Goleman: Emotional Intelligence 101 - Oprah's SuperSoul Conversations - Podcast

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Do you have a good sense of how others see the world? Psychologist, journalist and best-selling author Daniel Goleman discusses his ground-breaking research on emotional intelligence. Daniel expl... - Listen to Daniel Goleman: Emotional Intelligence 101 by Oprah's SuperSoul Conversations instantly on your tablet, phone or browser - no downloads needed.

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5 Ways to Incorporate SEL in Middle School

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5 Ways to Incorporate SEL in Middle School

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Social & Emotional Learning (SEL)

Social and emotional learning is more than a side curriculum-it should be woven into everyday activities throughout the school day.

As a new teacher nearly a decade ago, I was handed a curriculum for social and emotional learning (SEL) and instructed to teach it twice a week during advisory. I did so as best I could. My middle school students were ethnically diverse, but in ways that didn't match the students in the videos. My students dealt with very different racially charged terms, being that we're in Hawai'i. We had been given a research-based curriculum to combat a rise in complaints of bullying, but the curriculum was not culturally relevant to our students.

It was only when I was brave enough to go off-script and engage with my students about the terms they heard thrown about at recess, the insults they endured, and the cutting remarks they admitted to saying about one another that we were able to stare directly into our own biases and grow our own social awareness.

I began to wonder what could I do in my content classroom to promote relationship building and responsible decision-making. Middle level students need to practice these skills more often than twice a week.

Since then I've learned that SEL is ideally more than a curriculum-it's a set of thoughtful strategies embedded into everyday classroom activities and norms. In the best-case scenario, students should be given multiple opportunities throughout the school day for practicing self-awareness and self-management, increasing social awareness, building relationship skills, and making responsible decisions.

SEL is not the practices themselves-the connected practices collectively build and contribute to SEL skills. SEL is ideally interwoven into classroom practices such that it would be hard to tell SEL activities apart from other routines. I'm currently an assistant principal, but I used several practices in the classroom to achieve this interweaving, and I'll use them again next fall when I go back into the classroom.

5 Ways to Seamlessly Incorporate SEL in Class
Courtesy of Jill Fletcher
Paper tweets: I used a paper and pencil version of Twitter in class, an exercise in which students would initially connect with a friend, an acquaintance, and a classmate with whom they rarely spoke. Sometimes I used this for formative assessment, but it also worked as an SEL break-students wrote and discussed anything they wanted with their peers. I didn't read or assess this writing-it was solely for students.

I often had students write whatever they wanted as their initial "tweet," and then respond to the three peers they were "following." Sometimes I had them respond to as many peers as they wanted. One of their favorite steps was adding heart stickers to their favorite comments.

I also created my own profile, which students could use to ask me questions, which I would answer aloud. This was a comfortable form of engagement for introverted students.

Check in before you check out exit passes: Last year, I starting using exit tickets daily to ask students questions like: How are you feeling? What's new with you? What do you want to share with me? I was surprised by how many students wrote that they were sad, bored, or upset when they seemed engaged and outwardly happy, but at least asking these questions allowed me to address their emotional needs more quickly and more often.

After doing this for just a few weeks, I got to know my students really well, much faster than I had in previous years. Several students wrote to say that their favorite thing about my class was that I checked in with them every day and they were able to tell me how they were feeling.

Group one-pagers: In groups of four to six, students would create a sheet called a one-pager with their team name, group favorites such as food and movies (or any other favorites you'd like to ask them about), and a symbol to represent each member of the group. They also listed their favorite meme.

I had students do this on large poster paper, and it served as a kind of group flag. I would take a picture of each poster and post them around the room-the posters themselves would have taken up too much space, but it's very important to give students in the middle grades a sense of identity and belonging.

Relationship-building one-pagers: Students also created one-pagers about one of their peers or an adult on campus. On a piece of white printer paper, they would draw an image of the person and write their name, and then ask three peers for positive quotes about that person. Next they would draw three funny or meaningful images, and share two inside jokes or memories of the person. Then they would write a thoughtful, made-up definition of the person's name. Finally, they created a border in writing around the page with three or four adjectives to describe the person.

Observing my students creating these one-pagers was simply exquisite. Some of them selected security guards, others picked educational assistants, and of course, many chose their peers. At the end of the assignment, students delivered their one-pagers to the person who inspired them. It was touching to see the many tears from adults who were surprised that students appreciated them.

Student-led end-of-quarter celebrations: I gave students the freedom to create class-bonding celebrations. They selected themes, created potluck sign-ups, made invitations, and set up activities like a cupcake-decorating challenge or group craft projects. Some of the most memorable activities were a karaoke party with a strobe light, a fashion runway walk-off using materials like garbage bags and paper bags, a school-wide scavenger hunt, an escape room challenge, and a blindfolded makeup challenge.

This was an assignment, not just a party. I gave my students a rubric and examples of successful celebrations. I made clear that I expected them to create a bonding activity in which all class members would want to participate, and from start to finish the celebration could take up no more than 30 minutes. If we had a lot of time to plan, we would also invite other teachers and even the principal to celebrate with us.

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5 Ways to Incorporate SEL in Middle School

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Social & Emotional Learning (SEL) Social and emotional learning is more than a side curriculum-it should be woven into everyday activities throughout the school day. As a new teacher nearly a decade ago, I was handed a curriculum for social and emotional learning (SEL) and instructed to teach it twice a week during advisory.

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Academic Tenacity: Mindsets and Skills that Promote Long-Term Learning

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Academic Tenacity: Mindsets and Skills that Promote Long-Term Learning

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Read a report summarizing the research on non-academic factors like growth mindset, grit, and self-efficacy that allow students to work harder and smarter over time. (Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, 2014)

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Grit: the power of passion and perseverance | Angela Lee Duckworth

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Grit: the power of passion and perseverance | Angela Lee Duckworth

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Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance | Angela Lee Duckworth | TED

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How to Foster Grit, Tenacity and Perseverance: An Educator's Guide

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How to Foster Grit, Tenacity and Perseverance: An Educator's Guide

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The Brain Basis for Integrated Social, Emotional, and Academic Development

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The Brain Basis for Integrated Social, Emotional, and Academic Development

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This research brief from the National Commission on Social, Emotional, and Academic Development explores how emotions and relationships drive learning and are a fundamental part of how our brains develop. Authors Mary Helen Immordino-Yang, a professor of education, psychology and neuroscience at the University of Southern California and a member of the Council of Distinguished Scientists, and Linda Darling-Hammond, the president and CEO of the Learning Policy Institute and a co-chair of the Commission, explain how emotionally safe and cognitively stimulating environments contribute to brain development; how brain development that supports learning depends on social experiences; and how sensitive periods in brain development align with opportunities for learning and needed supports. The brief draws from the research base to suggest basic principles for educational policymakers and practitioners.
Access Footnotes to the report here

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The Brain Basis for Integrated Social, Emotional, and Academic Development - The Aspen Institute

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This research brief from the National Commission on Social, Emotional, and Academic Development explores how emotions and relationships drive learning and are a fundamental part of how our brains develop.

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Massachusetts Consortium for Social-Emotional Learning in Teacher Education (SEL-TEd)

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Research in neuroscience has proven that the brain has "plasticity," meaning it can grow new synapses through repetition. Research has also identified that different areas of the brain control various functions.

As a crucial example, severe negative emotional reactions are located and stimulated in an evolutionary-older part of the brain around the reactive amygdala, while patience, elevated comprehension, empathy and understanding are functions of areas of the brain that evolved later in human development.
Emotions strongly influence physical reactions as well, literally changing body chemistry according to whether the emotions are positive or negative. Stress, for example, has a profound impact on the body's (and brain's) biochemistry. Even a moment of stress triggers hormone secretions that we experience as unpleasant if not painful.
Responses include the familiar-to-everyone increased heart rate and blood pressure, muscle tension, and sinking feelings in the stomach. You know personally how hard it is for you to focus or take in information if you are in an anxiety or anger state.
Neuroscience further demonstrates that the higher cognitive part of the brain shuts down under stress - literally goes dark on brain scans while the reactive part of the brain linked to negative emotions lights up.
Consider then what happens to a child under stress from peers, or from a feeling of general "unsafety" in life or school, or from feelings of inadequacy. The child broods with - if not acts out - feelings he or she does not know how to manage, during which the reactive part of the brain has taken over from the learning part.

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Research in neuroscience has proven that the brain has "plasticity," meaning it can grow new synapses through repetition. Research has also identified that different areas of the brain control various functions.

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Get access to files anywhere through secure cloud storage and file backup for your photos, videos, files and more with Google Drive.

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Response to Intervention | RTI | RTI Resources | Intervention Central

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Intervention Central is the leading resource for Response to Intervention (RTI) tools and resources, including academic and behavior interventions for classroom management.

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How to Build Resilient Kids, Even After a Loss

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How to Build Resilient Kids, Even After a Loss

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Sheryl Sandberg: How to Build Resilient Kids, Even After a Loss - The New York Times.pdf

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Story about perseverance for students

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Fictional story about empathy and service (for students)

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Fictional story about empathy and service (for students)

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Strategies for Students With Scattered Minds

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Strategies for Students With Scattered Minds

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Imagine a team without a coach guiding players toward working together to execute a winning strategy. Imagine a company without a leader to make sure that employees across departments are equipped and organized to collaborate on continually improving products and increasing sales. Imagine a marching band without a drum major to lead musicians through their complicated maneuvers while staying on beat.

The brain's executive function network performs in the same capacity as a coach, CEO, or drum major: directing one's thinking and cognitive abilities toward setting goals and planning to achieve them, establishing priorities, getting and staying organized, and focusing attention on the task at hand. Now imagine trying to perform those abilities if your brain's executive functioning system wasn't working effectively -- no coach to develop a game plan, no CEO to help you organize your resources for accomplishing your goals, no drum major on which to maintain your learning focus.

That's the challenge facing students with attention deficit disorders, who in effect struggle with executive dysfunction. As a former classroom teacher and school psychologist, Donna worked with many youth who had great difficulty with various executive functions, including:

The ability to inhibit behavior, which often resulted in impulsivity, an abundance of movement, and difficulty following instructions

Initiation and planning behavior, the lack of which made it hard for students to get started on classroom work and assignments and maintain their focus on learning tasks for the duration required to complete them

Working memory and the ability to selectively maintain attention on information needed to complete a learning task

Cognitive flexibility, or the ability to recognize when it may be useful to adjust one's thinking and action based on new information

As we noted in our post Strategies for Strengthening the Brain's Executive Functions, children and youth can be taught to develop their executive functioning to become more successful self-directed learners. Explicit instruction about executive function and how to improve it is especially useful for students with learning challenges, as they can benefit the most from learning to rein in and consciously direct their "scattered minds."

Executive Function "Workouts"

Practical instruction to help struggling students hone executive function offers potential dual benefits. First, students will be better prepared to improve their performance in school and, later, on the job. Second, you can reduce classroom management issues by teaching these students strategies to avoid distractions -- and to create fewer distractions for classmates. If you need to guide youth with attention deficits, put these strategies to work in your classroom:

"Just a moment, let me think." Students who exhibit poor impulse control often benefit from additional adult support, including one-on-one strategizing about ways to overcome habits like blurting out an answer without thinking it through or behaving in ways that distract other students. For example, you might suggest that an impulsive student repeat the question either out loud or silently before answering. Maybe you'll agree on a "secret word," a password that you can say to remind the student about using his or her executive function abilities. Incorporating regular opportunities for movement into lessons can also help students reduce impulsive behaviors and stay focused on learning.

Start with the end in mind. Initiative, defined as readiness and skill in taking action, applies many aspects of executive function to maximum impact in school, work, and life. To help students develop initiative, guide them to establish their clear intent for a learning project as the first step in setting out a concrete plan to complete the task. Then if they start to go off task, they can revisit their clear intent: "Is what I'm doing now helping me to achieve my goal?" Breaking down learning tasks into a series of instructions is another useful strategy that models for students a step-by-step approach to direct their attention toward a small, discrete action that will move them closer to accomplishing their clear intent. Each little success along the way -- clicking another item off the to-do list -- can help keep students focused on big goals.

Learn to remember. Researchers working with students with attention deficits found that training to improve working memory (PDF) helped them avoid distractions and improve school outcomes. A variety of strategies have been developed to bulk up working memory. We've found that teachers and students alike enjoy and find useful a recall activity that we call Memory Pegs, which employs association to enhance memory. To help students recall the names of the first ten U.S. presidents in order, for example, guide them to say the names as they tap "pegs" on their body in descending order: George Washington (head), John Adams (shoulders), Thomas Jefferson (heart), all the way to number ten, John Tyler (toes).

Consider more options. Cognitive flexibility is a form of higher-order thinking that students can apply in creative problem solving and in weighing the pros and cons of multiple alternatives. Students with ADD may grab on to the first idea or answer that comes to mind. You can teach students to map their options with a graphic organizer that places the problem or question in the middle and encourages them to surround it with two or more solutions -- and the more the merrier. Option mapping reinforces that there is often more than one way to solve a problem or think about a concept. That in itself is a useful example of executive function at work!

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Strategies for Students With Scattered Minds

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Imagine a team without a coach guiding players toward working together to execute a winning strategy. Imagine a company without a leader to make sure that employees across departments are equipped and organized to collaborate on continually improving products and increasing sales.

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Charito is the Dean of Student Services at Lake Washington Girls Middle School, a small independent all-girls school in Seattle's Central District. Their mission is to empower girls to be strong in Mind, Body, and Voice - and they live that mission in everything they do. She teaches an innovative course called "Fuel for Thought," designed to support students in developing stronger executive skills, interpersonal skills, and self-regulation.

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Inspiration

Name: Charito (Rosario) Sotero de Menezes
Cohort: Mindful Teacher Class of 2016
My work with kids: Dean of Student Services
School: Lake Washington Girls Middle School
Location: Seattle, Washington
Connect with me: Instagram or email rosariosotero@gmail.com

I've worked with adolescents for 30 years, and the incidence of anxiety and depression in my students has risen alarmingly in the past ten years.

What inspired you to start practicing mindfulness?

I've worked with adolescents for 30 years, and the incidence of anxiety and depression in my students has risen alarmingly in the past ten years. I was inspired to do more to support and empower the teens I work with.

Since I never ask students to do something that I wouldn't do myself, I knew I had to practice mindfulness. I've always been surrounded by people who practiced meditation, but I never found a practice that I connected with. What surprised me is how much mindfulness changed me - how I engage with myself and others. Many people noticed a change after I started studying and practicing. I believe it's because I became kinder to myself and more compassionate towards others. I'm still working on it and am better some days than others, but the fact that it has a spotlight in my mind is a big deal.

What surprised me is how much mindfulness changed me - how I engage with myself and others. Many people noticed a change after I started studying and practicing. I believe it's because I became kinder to myself and more compassionate towards others.

Tell us about your own teen years.

There was always a tension between wanting to fit in and being myself. I grew up all over - born in Miami, lived in NJ, CT, Colombia and Brazil, then returned to the U.S. in high school. I was always friendly, a rule follower, athletic, a good student but not a superstar.

Because I moved around, came from a different ethnic background than the majority of my peers, and was not always in the know about what was "in," I never felt like I quite fit in socially. I had a different world view and didn't buy into group norms just because everyone else did. I worked hard to own my identity and be true to myself, but I'd be lying if I said that this tension didn't wear on me and chip away at my self-confidence.

Did you ever have doubts about teaching mindfulness?

I love teaching. In particular, I love teaching about the connection between brain development and function, how we navigate the world (stress, focus, bias, etc), and mindfulness. When I first started practicing with my students, I wasn't sure if there would be any carryover outside of school.

Then a parent shared that their child had had a medical crisis outside of school. When she was surrounded by paramedics, scared and stressed, she decided to practice her mindful minutes to get through it. I wasn't even sure that this student had been listening in class! Having a student who was new to mindfulness turn to her practice under duress was a reminder of the importance of this work.

What do you hope your students learn from you?

I have worked the entirety of my career with middle schoolers. They are dynamic, complex, creative, and passionate about the world. I see their power and their potential daily...it's exciting!

What I hope they've heard is:

1) Be kind and compassionate to yourself and others. Meeting discomfort from a place of compassion will often have a bigger impact towards change than judgement and isolation.

2) Own your own truth. Embrace every unique little piece of who you are with confidence. The drive to meet an arbitrary idea of what is "normal" or "cool" is a self-imposed barrier to potential.

3) Give attention to joy! Empathic joy is as valuable as empathic sorrow, engage in it! Notice it! Experience it! Challenge the idea that joy is "fluff." Joy, gratitude, and compassion build resilience.

4) Connection is the key to making change. It is tempting to hunker down and only engage with people that look, think, and act like like you. There is relief and comfort in this...I get it! However, to effect change, I have to see myself in you and visa versa - in order to do that I have to get to know you.

5) Stand by what is right - even when that is the hard thing to do. I will stand with you.

6) Dance, sing, be goofy! Someone can only make you feel embarrassed if you give them permission to.

7) I love my students... and I will sit alongside them as they work through difficult moments and celebrate achievements.

Can you share a favorite lesson with us?

I love teaching about the brain! When we can connect our biology to our experience in the world, we can more fully engage with everything around us.

We dig into this in Fuel for Thought, a course designed to support students in developing stronger executive skills, interpersonal skills, and self-regulation. Students learn about brain development, improve their study skills, and I introduce them to the practice of mindfulness.

A favorite activity is when students act out the stimulus-response process as a neural pathway. After they learn about the anatomy of a neuron, we demonstrate how a pathway works using their bodies, pencils, and a bell.

Have students line up side by side - they should face the same direction and spread out enough that they can extend their arms slightly. You can have one long chain/circle or several rows (pathway).

Give each student a pencil (neurotransmitter) to hold in their left hand except for the last person in line.

Give the last person a bell or buzzer to hold in their left hand.

Have each student hold their left hand (neuron) with the pencil hovering above their neighbor's empty right hand. There should be a gap (synapse) between their hands.

Get Set Up

The teacher creates a "stimulus" (squeeze, tap, pinch etc) in the empty right hand of the first person in the chain. That "stimulus" starts a chain reaction.

When the receiver feels the stimulus they release the pencil in their left hand into the right hand (neuron) of the next person and so on.

When the last person receives the pencil they ring the bell (response)!

Add a "Stimulus"

It's especially fun to divide the class into two "pathways" trying to get a message to the response person at the same time, make it a race, and do it with your eyes closed!

Can you tell us about a time in your life that you really leaned into your practice?

Half way through the Mindful School's year-long certification program, a person very close to me was the victim of an assault. Watching their suffering and supporting them through this time was one of the most challenging things I have ever done.

My practice was essential during this time for me and for them. When there was nothing I could do, I practiced heartfulness. When I was feeling out of control, I practiced. When they couldn't sleep, I guided them through a meditation until they did.

My cohort and the year-long program helped me stay centered and practice self-care. I've learned to trust the present and not surrender to the past. While the impact of their assault continues to unfold, our friendship, and practicing mindfulness has given us some peace and an anchor to rely on.

Who is one of your greatest supporters?
Thanks Charito for sharing your story! If you're interested in sharing your own story with our community here, or if you want to learn more about joining our community, simply reach out to us at community@mindfulschools.org. We love hearing more about your experiences and what you're learning.
My husband Márcio is a long-time meditator. His continuous encouragement and enthusiastic interest kept me going as I developed my personal practice. He believes deeply in the benefits but always gave me space to figure it out on my own. Because he's a pediatric neurologist, he always answered my questions about the neuroscience behind meditation, and was excited and curious about what I was learning!

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7 Mindful Practices for Middle Schoolers - Mindful Schools

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Charito is the Dean of Student Services at Lake Washington Girls Middle School, a small independent all-girls school in Seattle's Central District. Their mission is to empower girls to be strong in Mind, Body, and Voice - and they live that mission in everything they do.

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How to Model Perseverance in the classroom

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How to Model Perseverance in the classroom

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We all know students who seem to give up quickly and appeal for our help, even when the task is appropriately challenging, or students who are reluctant to even start a task that seems challenging and instead opt to sit and wait until we check in with them. These behaviors can halt progress and feel frustrating for both students and teacher.
Clearly, students don't always come to school knowing how to move from "This is too hard" to "This may take some time and effort but I can do it." That means we need to teach them strategies such as positive self-talk, taking a couple of deep breaths to calm themselves and then returning to work, choosing a different approach, or asking a partner a clarifying question.

Interactive Modeling is a powerful Responsive Classroom practice used to teach students the skills, strategies, and procedures they need for success in school. You can use Interactive Modeling to show students how to use a paintbrush, sound out words, or take care of the class pet. And you can also use it to teach them higher level academic skills and behaviors, such as how to persevere through challenging academic work.

Modeling Perseverance Strategies

As the following examples for primary and upper elementary grades show, Interactive Modeling is a good way to teach students how to persevere because it shows them what perseverance looks and sounds like and gives them immediate opportunities for supported practice.

Interactive Modeling is a straightforward, seven-step process used to teach children skills, strategies, or procedures that you want them to do in a specific way.

1. Briefly state what you will model, and why.

2. Model the behavior exactly as you expect students to do it. (Don't narrate unless you need to "show" an internal thinking process.)

3. Ask students what they noticed. Prompt them to notice essential details.

4. Invite one or more students to model the same way you did.

5. Again, ask students what they noticed.

6. Have all students practice.

7. Provide feedback.

To learn more, see Interactive Modeling: A Powerful Technique for Teaching Children.

Primary Grades Example

1. Say what you're going to model and why. "Remember when we played 'Rumpelstiltskin' at Morning Meeting today? That's a fun game, but it's also kind of hard. And you figured out how to help yourselves through the hard parts. Sometimes our schoolwork is challenging, too. And just as you figured out how to help yourself during 'Rumpelstiltskin,' it's important to learn how to help yourself when you feel frustrated with your work. I'm going to show you one way to help yourself when your work feels hard."

2. Model the behavior. "Watch what I do and say as I try to figure out how to understand this math problem." The teacher models reading a short problem and beginning to draw a picture to visualize it. Then he gives the sign (a finger pointing to his head) that he's going to do a think-aloud: "This is that kind of problem we've been doing where a number is missing. I don't know how to draw this and I'm frustrated." He takes a few deep breaths. "OK. I feel calmer. I can figure this out. Maybe I can use cubes instead of drawing."

3. Ask students what they noticed. "What did you notice me do when I got stuck on my work?" The students name what they saw and heard. The teacher prompts them if they missed anything important.

4. Invite a student to model. "Jocelyn, can you model taking a couple of deep breaths and talking to yourself in a calm way? Watch Jocelyn and notice what she does."

5. Again, ask students what they noticed. "What did you notice Jocelyn do when she got stuck?" Students name what they heard and saw.

6. Have all students practice. "As you work on your math tasks, pay attention to any times that the work feels hard. Then think about what you saw and heard when Jocelyn and I got stuck. After math, we'll talk about how you helped yourself. Sometimes, you'll still need my help, and that's OK too."

7. Provide feedback. As students work on their math, the teacher checks in with them. When he sees them using a calming strategy, he reinforces their behavior: "Amir, it looks like you took a deep breath and tried the problem a different way. You're remembering what we practiced!" And if he sees a student struggling, he reminds them what to try if they're stuck.

At the end of math class, he asks reflection questions: "Did any parts of math feel hard today?" "What did you try when math felt hard?" "How did that feel?"

Upper Elementary Grades Example

1. Say what you're going to model and why. "Challenging work can be exciting and can help us learn, but it can also feel frustrating. I'm going to show you a strategy to use when you get stuck on a problem so that you can keep going and feel successful, even if it's hard."

2. Model the behavior. "Watch what I do and say as I work on this math problem." The teacher models beginning a math problem and then gives the sign (a finger pointing to her head) that she's going to do a think-aloud. "Hmmm, this doesn't seem to make sense. Ugh, I get so frustrated when stuff doesn't make sense." She takes a couple of deep breaths. "This feels hard but that's OK. I'll reread it slowly out loud this time." She then returns to the problem.

3. Ask students what they noticed. "What did you notice about how I worked on that problem?" The teacher listens as students name what they saw and heard. She prompts them if they missed the self-talk she used to get through the tough part.

4. Invite one or more students to model. "Who would like to demonstrate taking a couple of calming breaths and using positive self-talk, just as I did?"

5. Ask students what they noticed. "What did you notice Marcus do as he worked on the problem?" The teacher takes a few observations then digs deeper: "How will doing this help Marcus?" she asks.

6. Have all students practice. "Now we're going to continue working on math problems. As you work, pay attention to any time that you struggle and remember what you saw and heard. During our reflection later, you'll have a chance to share what you did to work through the challenging parts."

7. Provide feedback. The teacher checks in with students as they work and reinforces their positive efforts; when they seem stuck, she reminds them what to try. At the end of class, she asks a few reflection questions: "What helped you today when you were stuck?" "What will you try tomorrow if something is challenging?"

Supporting Students as They Use the New Strategies

Once you've done the initial teaching through Interactive Modeling, students will need continuing opportunities to practice using perseverance strategies. Here are some ways you can support them.

Display the strategies. Try creating anchor charts listing the strategies you've modeled. One chart might list all the strategies; another might list a few key details about one of the strategies, such as phrases students could use in their self-talk.

Use positive teacher language. Reinforcing language lets students know what they're doing well so they can continue to make improvements. And before students begin challenging work, reminding language helps them remember what they can do to help themselves. Here are some examples to get you started:

An Empowering Message

Teaching students how to persevere when they feel stuck sends them an empowering message: that they can grow to be independent and confident learners. Using Interactive Modeling to teach perseverance strategies lets students observe exactly how to use the strategies, practice right away, and receive immediate feedback on their efforts. That clarity and immediacy will help ensure their success in learning how to work through difficulties not just in their schoolwork but in other challenging classroom situations as well.

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Teaching Perseverance? Try Interactive Modeling | Responsive Classroom

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We all know students who seem to give up quickly and appeal for our help, even when the task is appropriately challenging, or students who are reluctant to even start a task that seems challenging and instead opt to sit and wait until we check in with them.

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Kids face new experiences all the time. Making changes, like trying something new or starting healthy habits, can test even the most seasoned grown-ups. So how do you teach kids to motivate themselves in the face of a challenge?

That's where the power of positive self-talk comes in. Whether you're trying to get your child to try a new sport so they can be more physically active or remind yourself that you can make healthy food choices, positive self-talk can give your family the motivation you need to succeed.

It can build your family's confidence that you can indeed make healthy changes. If you teach your kids about positive-self talk and how to do it, it can give them the ability to change feelings of "I can't" to "Yes, I can."

What Is Positive Self-Talk?

Positive self-talk is a way people can encourage themselves. Tell your kids that lots of professional athletes use it to keep themselves motivated, confident, and focused on their goals and what they want to achieve. It helps them succeed. For example:

NFL quarterback Tom Brady has been known to say: "Try the best you can."

Beach volleyball Olympic gold medalist Kerri Walsh Jennings says: "Breathe, believe, battle."

You kids may feel better to learn that everyone has doubts - and even pro athletes have setbacks. Positive self-talk can help them keep going. World-class skier Lindsey Vonn says: "When you fall down, just get up again."

Let kids know that using positive-self talk takes practice. Just like they need to run and play to make their muscles and heart stronger, practicing positive self-talk helps their minds get stronger so they can make healthy choices.

"It's very important that your child sees that they always have a way to influence the outcome of things with their own effort, and how they look at things," says parenting expert Laura Markham, PhD, a clinical psychologist and author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting.

When Can Kids Use Positive Self-Talk?

One of the best times is when something seems too hard or makes them nervous. When doubt creeps in, teach them they can do something about it.

Continued

The first step is to recognize negative thoughts. Maybe your son wants to play soccer and you think playing a great way to encourage a life-long love of being physically active. But recently he's been having a hard time and you've heard him say, "I always mess up when I try to pass. Nobody's going to want to play with me. I won't make the team this year. Why try?"

As an outsider you may be able to see that's pretty extreme and not likely to happen. You want to teach him to recognize when he's saying and thinking negative things so he can find motivation to keep going.

However, sometimes recognizing negativity can be tricky, especially if it's something that you or your kids do out of habit.

How Do You Recognize Negative Self-Talk?

Negative thoughts tend to be sweeping, all-or-nothing statements that jump to conclusions. There are certain words that are flags for negative self-talk.

Listen for "I can't," "I never" or "I always."

"I can't score any goals!"

"I never have fun because I don't play well!"

"I always look bad. I'm the slowest one!"

When your kids say things like this, stop and talk to them. Then you can help them find more positive thoughts to think and say instead.

How Can You Help Your Kids Come Up With Positive Thoughts?

When you hear them say something negative, take a three-step approach: Find out what's wrong, reassure them, and help them choose a positive statement to say instead.

First, ask why they said what they did. You may learn they are focused on something they "messed up." Or maybe another child said something mean, like "You're slow."

Reassure them that you love them. Then:

If another child said something mean, try putting that in context. Say, "They must have had a bad day or feel bad about themselves."

If they feel that they "messed up," remind them that they'll have another chance to try again and that there are plenty of things they do well.

Continued

Next, ask them to say something positive about themselves. They can repeat those positive and encouraging things to themselves anytime they are about to try something new or difficult. These positive statements can become confidence-builders. For example, "I'm strong and a good teammate."

He could say this each time he is about to step onto the soccer field or when he feels himself getting nervous.

You can also teach kids to put a positive spin on things if they don't succeed.

Instead of: "I messed up that pass, I am terrible."

Have them try reframing it like: "That pass didn't work out like I wanted. I'll practice passes and try again next game."

"You're teaching your child that while you can't always control what happens to you, you can control the way you see it, and that changes what happens next for the better," says Markham.

Sources

SOURCES:

Laura Markham, PhD, clinical psychologist, author, Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting.

Arizona University, Sports Psych News: "Self-Talk."

Australian Sports Commission: "Listening to the Voices in Your Head: Identifying and Adapting Athletes' Self-Talk."

LindseyVonn.com.

Mental Health Foundation of Australia: "Embrace the Future Resilient Youth: Positive Self-Talk."

Indiana University: "Positive Self-Talk Takes Work."

Saint Louis University: "Positive Self-Talk to Decrease Test Anxiety."

The Telegraph: "Tom Brady: New England Patriots' 'golden boy' living the American Dream."

The University of British Columbia: "Building Confidence: Positive Self-Talk."

Women's Health: "Olympians share their personal mantras."

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How to Teach Your Kids about Positive Self-Talk

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Kids face new experiences all the time. Making changes, like trying something new or starting healthy habits, can test even the most seasoned grown-ups. So how do you teach kids to motivate themselves in the face of a challenge? That's where the power of positive self-talk comes in.

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Each of us has a set of messages that play over and over in our minds. This internal dialogue, or personal commentary, frames our reactions to life and its circumstances. One of the ways to recognize, promote, and sustain optimism, hope, and joy is to intentionally fill our thoughts with positive self-talk.

Too often, the pattern of self-talk we've developed is negative. We remember the negative things we were told as children by our parents, siblings, or teachers. We remember the negative reactions from other children that diminished how we felt about ourselves. Throughout the years, these messages have played over and over in our minds, fueling our feelings of anger, fear, guilt, and hopelessness.

One of the most critical avenues we use in therapy with those suffering from depression is to identify the source of these messages and then work with the person to intentionally "overwrite" them. If a person learned as a child he was worthless, we show him how truly special he is. If while growing up a person learned to expect crises and destructive events, we show her a better way to anticipate the future.

Try the following exercise. Write down some of the negative messages inside your mind that undermine your ability to overcome your depression. Be specific, whenever possible, and include anyone you remember who contributed to that message.

Now, take a moment to intentionally counteract those negative messages with positive truths in your life. Don't give up if you don't find them quickly. For every negative message there is a positive truth that will override the weight of despair. These truths always exist; keep looking until you find them.

You may have a negative message that replays in your head every time you make a mistake. As a child you have been told, "You'll never amount to anything" or "You can't do anything right." When you make a mistake-and you will because we all do-you can choose to overwrite that message with a positive one, such as "I choose to accept and grow from my mistake" or "As I learn from my mistakes, I am becoming a better person." During this exercise, mistakes become opportunities to replace negative views of who you are with positive options for personal enhancement.

Positive self-talk is not self-deception. It is not mentally looking at circumstances with eyes that see only what you want to see. Rather, positive self-talk is about recognizing the truth, in situations and in yourself. One of the fundamental truths is that you will make mistakes. To expect perfection in yourself or anyone else is unrealistic. To expect no difficulties in life, whether through your own actions or sheer circumstances, is also unrealistic.

When negative events or mistakes happen, positive self-talk seeks to bring the positive out of the negative to help you do better, go further, or just keep moving forward. The practice of positive self-talk is often the process that allows you to discover the obscured optimism, hope, and joy in any given situation.

Authored by Dr. Gregory Jantz, founder of The Center * A Place of HOPE and author of 30 books. Pioneering whole-person care nearly 30 years ago, Dr. Jantz has dedicated his life's work to creating possibilities for others, and helping people change their lives for good. The Center * A Place of HOPE, located on the Puget Sound in Edmonds, Washington, creates individualized programs to treat behavioral and mental health issues, including eating disorders, addiction, depression, anxiety and others.

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Each of us has a set of messages that play over and over in our minds. This internal dialogue, or personal commentary, frames our reactions to life and its circumstances. One of the ways to recognize, promote, and sustain optimism, hope, and joy is to intentionally fill our thoughts with positive self-talk.

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How to help students learn from failure

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Too often, students -- and teachers -- believe learning comes from success, when in truth, it's as likely to be the product of failure. Knowing what doesn't work is a powerful weapon as we struggle to think critically about the myriad issues along our path to college and/or career. As teachers, it's important we reinforce the concept through our teaching strategies that learning has many faces.

Here are ten teaching strategies to teach through failure:

What's the Mulligan Rule? Any golfers? A mulligan in golf is a do-over. Blend that concept into your classroom. Common Core expects students to write-edit-resubmit. How often do you personally rewrite an e-mail before sending? Or revise instructions before sharing? Or have "buyer's remorse" after a purchase and wish you could go back and make a change? Make that part of every lesson. After submittal, give students a set amount of time to redo and resubmit their work. Some won't, but those who do will learn much more by the process.

Don't Define Success as Perfection

When you're discussing a project or a lesson, don't define it in terms of checkboxes or line items or 100 percent accuracy. Think about your favorite book. Is it the same as your best friend's? How about the vacation you're planning -- would your sister pick that dream location? Education is no different. Many celebrated "successful" people failed at school because they were unusual thinkers. Most famously: Bill Gates, who dropped out of college because he believed he could learn more from life than professors.

Education pedagogists categorize these sorts of ideas as higher-order thinking and habits of mind -- traits that contribute to critical thinking, problem solving, and thriving. These are difficult to quantify on a report card, but critical to life-long success. Observe students as they work. Notice their risk-taking curiosity, how they color outside the lines. Anecdotally assess their daily efforts and let that count as much as a summative exam that judges a point in time.

Let Students See You Fail

One reason lots of teachers keep the same lesson plans year-to-year is they are vetted. The teacher won't be surprised by a failure or a question they can't answer. Honestly, this is a big reason why many eschew technology: Too often, it fails at just that critical moment.

Revise your mindset. Don't hide your failures from students. Don't apologize. Don't be embarrassed or defeated. Show them how you recover from failure. Model the steps you take to move to plan B, C, even X. Show your teaching grit and students will understand that, too, is what they're learning: How to recover from failure.

Share Teaching Strategies for Problem Solving

Problems are inevitable. Everyone has them. What many people DON'T have is a strategy to address them. Share these with students. The Common Core Standards for Mathematical Practice is a good starting point. Mostly, they boil down to these simple ideas:

Act out a problem.

Break problem into parts.

Draw a diagram.

Guess and check.

Never say can't.

See patterns.

Notice the forest and the trees.

Think logically.

Distinguish relevant from irrelevant info.

Try, fail, try again.

Use what has worked in the past.

Post these on the classroom wall. When students have problems, suggest they try a strategy from this list, and then another, and another. Eventually, the problem will resolve, the result of a tenacious, gritty attack by an individual who refuses to give up.

Exult in Problems

If you're geeky, you love problems, puzzles, and the maze that leads from question to answer. It doesn't intimidate or frighten you, it energizes you. Share that enthusiasm with students. They are as likely to meet failure as success in their lives; show them your authentic, granular approach to addressing that eventuality.

Assess Grit

Success isn't about right and wrong. More often, it's about grit -- tenacity, working through a process, and not giving up when failure seems imminent. Statistically, over half of people say they "succeeded" (in whatever venture they tried) not by being the best in the field but because they were the last man standing.

Integrate that into your lessons. Assess student effort, their attention to detail, their ability to transfer knowledge from earlier lessons to this one, their enthusiasm for learning, how often they tried-failed-retried, and that they completed the project. Let students know they will be evaluated on those criteria more than the perfection of their work.

Let Students Teach Each Other

There are many paths to success. Often, what works for one person is based on their perspective, personal history, and goals. This is at the core of differentiation: that we communicate in multiple ways -- visually, orally, tactally -- in an effort to reach all learning styles.

Even so, students may not understand. Our failure to speak in a language they understand will become their failure to learn the material. Don't let that happen. Let students be the teachers. They often pick a relationship or comparison you wouldn't think of. Let students know that in your classroom, brainstorming and freedom of speech are problem solving strategies.

Don't Be Afraid to Move the Goalposts

Even if it's in the middle of a lesson. That happens all the time in life and no one apologizes, feels guilty, or accommodates your anger. When you teach a lesson, you constantly reassess based on student progress. Do the same with assessment.

But make it fair. Let students know the changes are rooted in your desire that they succeed. If you can't make that argument, you probably shouldn't make the change.

Success is as Much Serendipity as Planning

Think of Velcro and post-it notes -- life-changing products resulting from errors. They surprised their creators and excited the world. Keep those possibilities available to students.

Don't Reward Speed

Often, students who finish first are assigned the task of helping neighbors or playing time-filler games. Finishing early should not be rewarded, or punished. Sometimes it means the student thoroughly understood the material. Sometimes it means they glossed over it. Students are too often taught finishing early is a badge of honor, a mark of their expertise. Remove that judgment and let it be what it is.

I leave you with five of my favorite quotes about failure. If you have one, please share it in comments:
"Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently." --Henry Ford "I've failed over and over again in my life. That's why I succeed." --Michael Jordan "I haven't failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that don't work." --Thomas Edison "We learn from failure, not success." --Bram Stoker "Success is the ability to go from one failure to the next without loss of enthusiasm." --Winston Churchill
has been teaching K-8 technology for 15 years. She is the editor/author of over a hundred tech ed resources including a K-8 technology curriculum, K-8 keyboard curriculum, K-8 Digital Citizenship curriculum. She is an adjunct professor in tech ed, CSG Master Teacher, webmaster for six blogs, an book reviewer, Editorial Review Board member for Journal for Computing Teachers, CAEP reviewer, CSTA presentation reviewer, freelance journalist on tech ed topics, and a weekly contributor to . You can find her resources at

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Teaching Strategies: Let Students Learn From Failure

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10 teaching strategies to teach through failure.

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Parents tend to see their mission as helping their kids succeed. But there's a growing realization among teachers and other professionals who work with children that kids increasingly need help learning how to fail.

Not learning to tolerate failure leaves kids vulnerable to anxiety. It leads to meltdowns when the inevitable failure does occur, whether it happens in preschool or college. And perhaps even more important, it can make kids give up trying-or trying new things.

That's why Michael Jordan, one of the world's greatest athletes, has spent years preaching the importance of losing. Jordan has spoken extensively about how perseverance and resilience in the face of challenges on and off the court are what have made him a winner.

Unfortunately, as the world puts increased pressure on kids to be winners, and parents feel compelled to enable them in every way possible, we're seeing more and more kids who become distraught over even the smallest misstep.

Take Sara's son John, who started taking piano lessons at 6. "Every time he played a wrong note he would pick up the music booklet and hit himself on the head with it!" she says. "His piano teacher said she'd never seen a kid who was so hard on himself. I told him when he made a mistake to treat himself the way he'd treat his younger cousin, that no one can learn if someone's being mean to them, and that he wasn't allowed to be mean to himself."

When Alicia's daughter Sara was 14, she became so distraught over not getting into a selective high school, while friends did, she began to self-harm. "It was so terrible: the pressure, the disappointment," says Alicia.

Clearly, distress or frustration tolerance is an important life skill to master. When it comes to school, "the ability to tolerate imperfection-that something is not going exactly your way-is oftentimes more important to learn than whatever the content subject is," says Dr. Amanda Mintzer, a clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute. "Building that skill set is necessary for kids to be able to become more independent and succeed in future endeavors, whether it's personal goals, academic goals, or just learning how to effectively deal with other people."

So how do parents teach kids to fail? Dr. Mintzer offers a multistep process:

First, show empathy

Empathize with your child; see that she's in distress. "Don't just say, 'It's okay, you'll do better next time,'" Dr. Mintzer says. "It's invalidating to brush off a child's feelings of frustration and disappointment." Instead, parents need to change their language: "I see you're really disappointed, I know you really wanted to do better."

Make yourself a model

You can explain that failure is a part of life and happens to everyone, even you. You could share examples of "failures" you've had. "Parents can model how to handle their own disappointment," such as losing out on a promotion at work, Dr. Mintzer says. "Kids aren't necessarily exposed to the reality that life includes mistakes, missteps, and even failures. As much as everyone likes things to go according to plan, it's important to teach our children that it is also okay when they don't."

Make it a teachable moment

A child's failure is a chance for parents to teach acceptance and problem-solving skills. You and your child can try to come up with what she could do the next time for a better chance at success. For instance, could she study differently or talk to the teacher about any problems she's having before a test?

"It's a balance of acceptance and change," Dr. Mintzer says. "It's about accepting that the situation is what it is and building frustration tolerance while also asking, 'Can we change something in the future. Can we learn from this?'"

The minefield of social media

At the same time, kids need to know that sometimes when we fail or face disappointment, there's not a lot we can do about it in that moment; we have to accept it as a part of life and move on. Dr. Mintzer notes as an example the minefield that is social media.

Say a girl's friends tell her they can't hang out with her and then she sees them together on Instagram or Facebook.

"That really hurts," Dr. Mintzer says. "There are lots of emotions: frustration, disappointment, sadness, anger. How does she deal with that? Calling friends and screaming at them only makes things worse. She could ignore it and pretend she never saw, but that's not going to make her feel better or change what happens in the future."

So how can a parent help her accept what happened? The girl might be able to get more information to make herself feel better. Perhaps she can talk to these kids in a calm way, telling them that she saw the photos and her feelings were hurt. Maybe she'll discover a reason behind it. But she may not get an answer she likes, or get one at all.

That leads to another life lesson: Sometimes we get left out, sometimes we aren't liked, and we have to learn to cope with that truth without making the situation worse. Dr. Mintzer notes, "A lot of these skills are needed for interpersonal relationships."

Step back and allow kids to fail

It can be very tough to watch your child fall down but she can only learn how to handle disappointment through trial and error. As books like The Blessings of a Skinned Knee and the newly released Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed emphasize, parents must stop hovering. Otherwise, they rob children of the very experiences that require problem-solving and set them on the path to resilience and the confidence to take on new challenges.

Therapy can help

If a child can't function because of a fear of failure, therapy may be called for. Even if a child doesn't have an anxiety diagnosis, she may be frozen with anxiety. When that happens, Dr. Mintzer says, with what's called exposure therapy, "we slowly expose them to things that aren't perfect."

For instance, parents will complain that homework takes forever because a child will repeatedly rip it up and start over. "We're teaching kids that it's okay to misspell a word and keep going," she says. "In a session we might have them write a paragraph or two and make as many mistakes as they can, including sloppy handwriting, to get them used to the idea that it 's not the end of the world."

"We're saying," she adds, "'We're going to practice making mistakes. We know, it's uncomfortable for you, and we also know that with practice, you can learn how tolerate it.'"

Parents have more ways to help their kids move beyond failure.

When Alicia discovered Sara's self-harming, she tried to set her up for success by enrolling her in a small, private school. She also got Sara into therapy and tried to give her the time and support to "figure things out," allowing her the chance to feel proud of herself when she did.

Alicia says Sara, now about to start her junior year, "just told me she's so glad she went there instead of one of the selective enrollments. At the time, it seemed to her like a huge failure to be rejected by those schools. But she's much happier now, no self-harming and displaying resiliency."

Learning to fail can be painful. But kids will only succeed if they can acquire the skill to handle whatever life throws their way.

Read More:
What to Do (and Not to Do) When Children Are Anxious
12 Tips for Raising Confident Kids
How to Help Kids Who Are Too Hard on Themselves

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Help Kids Learn to Fail | Building Self-Esteem in Children | Child Mind Institute

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Parents tend to see their mission as helping their kids succeed. But there's a growing realization among teachers and other professionals who work with children that kids increasingly need help learning how to fail. Not learning to tolerate failure leaves kids vulnerable to anxiety.

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My students never know what to make of my "I hope you fail" lecture. After years of teachers asking for the right answers, they aren't accustomed to someone highlighting or requesting the wrong ones.

Students' failures tend to linger, creating mental baggage that interferes with learning. Lifting the burden requires us to address failure head-on and encourage students to accept it as a natural part of getting educated.

Here's how teachers can help students see the benefits and advantages of making mistakes:

Don't let ideas become precious

Student benchmarks have become more complicated, forcing students to transcend content knowledge and develop critical-thinking skills. This means more guessing, which can be intimidating for students.

In a discussion with Scientific American podcaster Steve Mirsky, Arizona State University physicist Lawrence Krauss recently pointed out that real-world problems are "not solvable exactly" and that students must be able to change the course of their thinking for a variety of reasons. The flexibility and the stick-to-it-iveness of facing failure head-on are fundamental to long-term student success.

While educators have to ensure that students have the right content and support to avoid chronic failure, it is just as important to embrace mistakes as an inevitable part of education. Adopting a "fail faster" attitude makes students more likely to do the difficult work we ask of them. Often, even their failures tell us something about their understanding.

Give students permission to get things wrong

Our culture is so focused on success or perfection that we miss the benefits of failure. To encourage students to accept failure as essential to progress, I share with them a decontextualized Samuel Becket quote: "Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better."

I also show them a video on game design by Extra Credits that reinforces the "fail faster" ethos. Both the quote and the video help students see something really essential to education: We are going to mess up, and that's OK.

In her piece " 5-Minute Film Festival: Freedom to Fail Forward," Edutopia author Amy Erin Borovoy compiled a set of videos and articles on the subject of failure. Paraphrasing John Dewey, Borovoy reminds readers that "a true thinker learns as much from failures as from successes." Incorporating these short videos as monthly or weekly reminders can be a great way to start "how have we failed and what have we learned" discussions with students.

Make failure another chance to get it right

Using a technique called "Effective Failure," educators can work failing faster into the classroom. In my writing class, I often ask students to volunteer samples of their best or worst writing. This lets writers illustrate their understanding that a sentence, transition, word choice, or paragraph construction has failed, and it inspires a sincere interest in better writing. An astronomy instructor I work with asks students questions and then, in small groups, has them explain their thinking to their group, saying, "Explain your answer to your neighbor and try to convince them you're right."

In this exercise, each student at the table becomes an expert hashing out truth. Then the teacher asks students to share their answers. These answers, especially the wrong ones, help her identify student misunderstandings and clear them up immediately.

Incorporating failure into class design prevents students from being too afraid to answer. It also ensures they aren't more invested in being right than understanding the problems they're trying to solve.

Take a few risks

Students who integrate mistakes into the educational process are prepared for the feedback that helps them grow. A classroom that thinks this way provides an additional bonus for teachers: Once unleashed from our own struggle for perfection, we can take risks ourselves. In fact, we must take risks, get feedback and be ready to incorporate failure.

Students are not the only ones who can learn from their mistakes.
Monica Fuglei is a graduate of the University of Nebraska in Omaha and a current faculty member of Arapahoe Community College in Colorado, where she teaches composition and creative writing.
Learn More: Click to view related resources.

You may also like to read

Tags: Mid-Career Teacher, New Teacher, Professional Development

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Why Students Need to be Comfortable with Failure

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My students never know what to make of my "I hope you fail" lecture. After years of teachers asking for the right answers, they aren't accustomed to someone highlighting or requesting the wrong ones. Students' failures tend to linger, creating mental baggage that interferes with learning.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.readable_text
My students never know what to make of my "I hope you fail" lecture. After years of teachers asking for the right answers, they aren't accustomed to someone highlighting or requesting the wrong ones.

Students' failures tend to linger, creating mental baggage that interferes with learning. Lifting the burden requires us to address failure head-on and encourage students to accept it as a natural part of getting educated.

Here's how teachers can help students see the benefits and advantages of making mistakes:

Don't let ideas become precious

Student benchmarks have become more complicated, forcing students to transcend content knowledge and develop critical-thinking skills. This means more guessing, which can be intimidating for students.

In a discussion with Scientific American podcaster Steve Mirsky, Arizona State University physicist Lawrence Krauss recently pointed out that real-world problems are "not solvable exactly" and that students must be able to change the course of their thinking for a variety of reasons. The flexibility and the stick-to-it-iveness of facing failure head-on are fundamental to long-term student success.

While educators have to ensure that students have the right content and support to avoid chronic failure, it is just as important to embrace mistakes as an inevitable part of education. Adopting a "fail faster" attitude makes students more likely to do the difficult work we ask of them. Often, even their failures tell us something about their understanding.

Give students permission to get things wrong

Our culture is so focused on success or perfection that we miss the benefits of failure. To encourage students to accept failure as essential to progress, I share with them a decontextualized Samuel Becket quote: "Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better."

I also show them a video on game design by Extra Credits that reinforces the "fail faster" ethos. Both the quote and the video help students see something really essential to education: We are going to mess up, and that's OK.

In her piece " 5-Minute Film Festival: Freedom to Fail Forward," Edutopia author Amy Erin Borovoy compiled a set of videos and articles on the subject of failure. Paraphrasing John Dewey, Borovoy reminds readers that "a true thinker learns as much from failures as from successes." Incorporating these short videos as monthly or weekly reminders can be a great way to start "how have we failed and what have we learned" discussions with students.

Make failure another chance to get it right

Using a technique called "Effective Failure," educators can work failing faster into the classroom. In my writing class, I often ask students to volunteer samples of their best or worst writing. This lets writers illustrate their understanding that a sentence, transition, word choice, or paragraph construction has failed, and it inspires a sincere interest in better writing. An astronomy instructor I work with asks students questions and then, in small groups, has them explain their thinking to their group, saying, "Explain your answer to your neighbor and try to convince them you're right."

In this exercise, each student at the table becomes an expert hashing out truth. Then the teacher asks students to share their answers. These answers, especially the wrong ones, help her identify student misunderstandings and clear them up immediately.

Incorporating failure into class design prevents students from being too afraid to answer. It also ensures they aren't more invested in being right than understanding the problems they're trying to solve.

Take a few risks

Students who integrate mistakes into the educational process are prepared for the feedback that helps them grow. A classroom that thinks this way provides an additional bonus for teachers: Once unleashed from our own struggle for perfection, we can take risks ourselves. In fact, we must take risks, get feedback and be ready to incorporate failure.

Students are not the only ones who can learn from their mistakes.
Monica Fuglei is a graduate of the University of Nebraska in Omaha and a current faculty member of Arapahoe Community College in Colorado, where she teaches composition and creative writing.
Learn More: Click to view related resources.

You may also like to read

Tags: Mid-Career Teacher, New Teacher, Professional Development

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Why Students Need to be Comfortable with Failure

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
My students never know what to make of my "I hope you fail" lecture. After years of teachers asking for the right answers, they aren't accustomed to someone highlighting or requesting the wrong ones. Students' failures tend to linger, creating mental baggage that interferes with learning.