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What are your responses for your journal entries this week?

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If you have any problems with this let me know. You should be able to go back and finish. Make sure to read over what you have written. Check for errors.

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Hi I am going to write why I   disagree  with the Holocaust. To find out  why I disagree  with the Holocaust read on.

The reason I disagree with the Holocaust is because he killed 17,000,000 Jews, handicapped people ,Polish people,Serbs, and Catholics.The author stated,"form 1933 to 1945 six million  Jewish people (one million were children) were murdered by Hitler's Nazis party."He killed almost every one the ones he didn't have killed were people with blonde hair and blue eye's.

Rebekkah,
I need more from you Rebekkah, I know it is in there, but I need you to let it come out. This whole week we have talked about the pieces of what an opinion/argumentative writing should have. You are missing a conclusion. You have to have that. If I must be honest you should have more than one reason why you disagree with Hitler.
Remember in your introduction you have to at least have 3-5 sentences. We will be working on introductions and how to make them stand out from the rest this week. Make sure you are listening as we learn more about these. I do appreciate the fact that you indented. I would love for you to share with others how you did that instead of me sharing all the time little tricks.
Next week, please make sure you have all of the parts you should have in your writing. I look forward to reading a phenomenal piece from you next week.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Ms. Ray I disagree with the Holocaust because what Hitler did to the Jewish people and other races was wrong because he wiped out at least 4 or more races according to what I've seen in the book and what also goes with what I've read but here's why I hate the holocaust Hitler the man himself killed woman, children, baby's, toddlers, and men now your probably thinking Jenit why would they kill men they could be useful to Hitler for doing work and labor for free like slaves use to and the answer to that is simple Hitler sometimes kills men because they have disabilities and sicknesses and the rest of the men who didn't have disabilities he would keep and use as slaves and I absolutely didn't like that he experimented on them did tests on them and killed them by acid gas or something like that I also didn't like the fact that women watched their babies die right in their arms but at least those dead women, babies, children, toddlers, and men could at least rest in peace and the other 11 million people that died.

Jenit,
Thanks for sharing with me this week on padlet! I love see you work on your typing skills as well as working more with technology.
There are 3 MAJOR things we need to fix when you are doing this on the computer. You need to indent, use punctuation, and have author's based evidence. You have to have paragraphs. When you have paragraphs it lets the reader of your work know that you are changing your thoughts. You have to have these, it also helps the reader to know what you are writing about in your introduction and that you are ending your writing in your conclusion. I also told you to go back and review your periods. I am not sure if you forgot, but you only have ONE period in this whole writing piece. You must have punctuation at the end of your sentences to show a complete thought. Please go back and put these punctuation marks in ASAP! The third thing is that you have to have evidence from the text you are given to use. That is one thing that will separate your writing from a 2-3 or a 3-4. The major standard in 5th grade is for you to be able to quote accurately from the text. Did you do that in the writing piece. What would you give yourself on this piece of writing?
Last thing, remember you need to put a comma after someone's name. That is a comma rule of having a sentence and directing it to someone specifically. So, there should have been a comma after "Ms. Ray," because you were directing your writing to me so that I would read it. Do you know what I mean by that?
Overall, your piece was well written piece, but it would have been even better if you would have addressed the issues I wrote about in the  previous paragraphs.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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I disagree with the Holocaust . Because, what Hitler did wasn't eve nice that is one of  the reasons that I disagree. Now my mom said that blonde headed people with blue eyes he didn't  kill. Still I really don't agree with him. Because he still killed Jewish people and Polish people also and Catholics, Serbs, handicapped people. Plus he would take groups  of people and put them into a big oven. And, cook them alive then do science tests on them.
The second reason I disagree with the holocaust. Is because Hitler blamed the Jewish people for winning WORLD WAR 1. Now I am about to write something from the text. ''He believed that Jewish people were less human''. So I was just reading that he has a book called ''Mein Kampf''. But he wrote that before he became the ruler of Germany.

Zoie,
Thanks for sharing this week! I love that you shared on pallet and did your homework on here. It will totally help you out on the Milestones with typing.
Remember in order to get a 3 or a 4 on the Milestones you have to have an introduction and a conclusion paragraph. Those are essential. You did give me reasons and explanations/examples/evidence to explain why you did not disagree with Hitler. However, remember if you are quoting from the text you must write: In the text the author stated, "______." The 5th grade standard they are looking for in your writing is the ability to quote accurately from the text. When the standards says accurately that means you have to do it just like we have learned or they will see it as that you have not mastered the standard. Does that make sense?
Always make sure to go back and reread over what you write as a writer. Many times we can miss things in our writing that we could have corrected if we would have went back over it and reread through it.
Thanks for sharing with me this week.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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KANYE NELSON                                                                                                                    

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KANYE NELSON                                                                                                                    

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Hitler

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I am going to write about whether I agree or disagree with the Holocaust. I do not agree with the Holocaust. Here are some reasons why.
The first reason of why I don't agree with the Holocaust is millions of innocent people were murdered. Next, is Hitler hated people that he did'nt even know. According to the author,"He began to make laws that did not allow Jews to have any rights."  Innocent children were killed to. Hitler also thought one race was better than another race. According to the author,"In his book ,he wrote about himself becoming ruler of Germany, and he would then rid of the Jews."
In conclusion,I wrote about whether I agree or disagree with the Holocaust.

Kaelah,
Thanks for sharing your writing with me this week! I love seeing you all write your journal entries on the computer. It is such great practice for what is to come.
You had a good introduction and you stated your opinion/assertion. That is the most important thing to do when you are writing an argumentative piece of writing. However, within your writing you stated, "Here are some reasons." If you put an "s" on the word reason that states you are going to write more than one reason. However, you only wrote one reason. If you only meant to write one be careful on pluralizing nouns, because that will confuse the reader. Another thing to think about in your writing you stated that Hitler hated people he didn't even know and then your evidence stated that Hitler made laws, so that the Jews did not have any rights. Be very careful with this because your reason was a good reason; however, the text evidence did not support your reason. Your text evidence has to support your reason. If not then it is like throwing any old piece of text evidence in your writing. When the text evidence matches your reason, then your writing will flow. As writers we want our writing to flow when readers read it.
I am glad that you remembered to put a conclusion in your piece this week. Remember though you must have 3-5 sentences in your conclusion.
I am also telling everyone to reread over what they are typing to share. When you do this you will be able to see what mistakes you are making in your writing. Rereading over what you write is so important because it allows you to fix things that you may need to fix in order to make your writing clear to the readers.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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I'm going to type weather I agree with holocaust or not.I disagree with the holocaust. I will give you reasons why I disagree with the holocaust.     The first reason is that Hitler killed 17,000,000, Jews, handicapped people(special needs people),Polish people,Serbs, and Catholics. In the text the author stated,'From 1933 to 1945, six million Jewish people (1 million were children) were murdered by Hitler's political party,Nazis.That's horrible what Hitler was doing to those  poor people.I feel bad for them.   The second reason is that Hitler blamed the Jews for loosing WW 1 Hitler thought that the Jews were dirt.Hitler thought the Aryan race was the perfect race.that meant that you had to

William,
I am a little concerned with this piece because it seems it is not finished.   Is it finished?
Remember  even though you are typing on a computer you still      have to indent and have paragraphs. What could have made your writing stronger what are you missing? If you had to grade this writing what would you have given yourself?
When you are writing a piece of writing on the computer you don't say I am going to type, you say I am going to write about ....... It is just like when you are handwriting a piece of writing you just don't say, "I am going to be telling you about blah," because you are not talking to them, but you are writing to them about what you are going to tell them all about.
Just for future reference, weather refers to actual weather outside like sunny or hot. The correct word you should have used was "whether".
This piece was on topic, but it could  have been so much better if you would have added the things that I mentioned and that I know you know to do usually.
Thanks for sharing with me this week.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Dear Ms.Ray, I am going to talk about why I don't agree with the Holocaust. read on to see my reasons.
First, the first reason is that from 1933 to 1945 Hitler and his Nazis party killed over 6 million Jewish people (1 million were kids). Does Hitler know that the Jews are God people. In the text the author said,"from 1933 to 1945, six million Jewish people (1 million were children) were murdered by Hitler's political party, Nazis."

Lastly, Hitler killed over 17 million innocent people(6 million were Jews). In the text the author says," It is believed that 17 million innocent people were murdered."

In conclusion, I talked about how i disagreed with the Holocaust. Hope you enjoyed.

Will,
Thanks for sharing with me on Padlet this week. The biggest thing I need you to do for this piece is to go back and reread what you are writing about. You have to do this. Once you do you will see the mistakes that are so minute in your writing and then be annoyed with yourself because you usually don't have these tiny mistakes. Go back over this and check out what I am talking about.
A question I  have about your writing is that you told us the reasons you disagree with Hitler. But in your explanation you didn't explain why Hitler killed, so may Jews or people period. Why did he kill so many innocent people?
Remember, you don't have to put "Hope you enjoyed" in your writing, people in formal writing jus want you to write to answer the question that was asked for you to answer. (I love it at the end when you are writing it in a letter format to me. Unfortunately, on the Milestones, they don't want the pleasantries. Just remember that.) Remember you introduction and conclusion should at least be 3-5 sentences long. I am going to show you all this week how to make your introductions and conclusions logger, so make sure you pay close attention to that lesson.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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01/11/2017  this is my                   writing about why i      disagree the first reason why i disagree is why is the way why hitler did the people like that ,he put them in a gas room and killed them,Basic on what the author said hitler put 6,000 people in the gas room ,and tit them on fire,and swep them up.           The next reason why i disagree is

Shanquavus,
Man, this sure is bumming me out this week to see all of these unfinished pieces of writing and all of these capitalization and punctuation errors. What is up with you guys?
You guys are not reading over your writing and you are missing the tiniest detail, but most important details in your writing. You have to have quotes "" if you are quoting from a another piece of writing. That let's the readers know that you have found that information from somewhere else and that you did not say it yourself.
Next week, please make sure to finish your writing and write like I know you know how to. Just because we are doing it on the computer doesn't mean that you throw out what you know you are suppose to do in your writing out the window.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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The mouse was about to be sucked in the vacuum cleaner but he made the noise and the motorcycle went zooming. Ralph was away from the vacuum cleaner and safe. Ralph had broken Kieth's promise .Kieth was going to leave in a few days. Ralph  needed more food for his family so they wouldn't starve Kieth was going to bring 10 peanut butter and jelly sandwhiches for his family to eat.

Ralph was on his way down stairs when the maid found him and covered him in a basket.  Ralph was chewing holes in the towels. Ralph finally escaped . But where was the motorcycle he had lost it in the basket. Ralph had to go get it. What was he going to do go get it and risk his life or leave it there. TO BE CONTINUED...............

Charon,
This has to be yours. I meant to ask you on Friday, but I forgot. If is not yours, please let me know and I will change the name of the person it belongs to. But I think last time I read your journal you were the one writing about this same topic. Thanks for sharing this week with me.
You did a good job with indenting the  second paragraph I am not sure if you didn't mean to or not in the first paragraph. You did a fabulous job with summarizing the chapter(s) or sections that you read in your book this past week. I do enjoy how you leave the to be continued. That is a great way to get your readers excited about what is going to happen next. It is very similar to like a cliff hanger. Major thing to work on here is reading back over what you have written and making sure you catch and errors. Remember  if you start a sentence with what, why, where, or when you are going to have to have a ? question mark at the end of the sentence. Check out the last sentence of the 2nd paragraph to see what I am talking about. Other than that you had a great summary about what you have read so far.
I would like to see you responding to some of the social studies prompts just so I can see what you can do if you are given that to be tested on. Plus practice makes perfect! The more you do it the better you become at it.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Hi I am going to talk about whether or not I disagree or agree with the Holocaust. But anyway I disagree with Holocaust because .....  Read on for more info.

The first reason I disagree with this is that  he murdered  more than 6 million people and 1 million was children. The author said'' From 1933 to 1945. six million Jewish people (1 million were children) were murdered by Hitler's political party, Nazis.'' He also hated Polish, Catholics, Serbs, and Handicapped people. That just wrong what Hitler did. It was even 17 million and they were innocent too. The author said'' It is believed that 17 million if not more innocent people were murdered.''

The last reason is Hitler only like one kind of race blonde hair and blue eyes or Aryan race. The author said'' There was one race Hitler thought was superior and that was the Aryan race or people with blonde hair and blue eyes.'' He wrote a book called , Mein Kampf. He wrote about him becoming ruler some people think it couldn't happen but he became ruler and getting rid of Jews. He destroyed business and homes of Jewish. The author said '' He didn't stop there, he even organized attacks on businesses and homes of Jewish people.''  he fired and vandalism homes. That was called Kristallnacht or Night with Broken Glass.

In conclusion, you have read why I disagree with Hitler, how he only like two kind of people, and what he did to the Jewish. So I wonder do agree or disagree with Hitler?  I hope you enjoyed my opinion. What yours?

Ja'Cayla,
Thanks for sharing with m this week. I love how you were able to make your writing shine on Padlet this week. The picture was a nice touch as well. I love when you guys get to explore with technology and make your writing your own.
I know your first paragraph is your introduction and this week I am going to help you all work on hooking your readers into what you are reading about  using the introduction paragraph. I am seeing this with everyone, so we need to fix it.
Your second and third paragraph you did really well with giving your reason and then giving evidence to support your reason. I also love that I could hear your voice and how your truly felt about the issue that happened. Remember when you are quoting from an article or text to put a comma after the word the said, "___." A major part of the 5th grade standards is that you can quote accurately from the text. It easier to quote accurately when we are handwriting something; however, make sure you still include the punctuation when you are typing. If you can do it with a pencil you can do it when you are pushing keys.
Your conclusion paragraph was well written. I loved the way you asked the readers for their opinion about what they are reading about. That was a nice touch. Be careful especially on formal writing when you say, "I hope you enjoyed my opinion." Not that your opinion does not matter, but the reader already knows how you feel about the issue. You don't want them to like yours, but you want to give them enough reasons and evidence that it persuades them to believe or have the same opinion that you have. That's what it takes for a lawyer to win a court case. The lawyer has to provide enough evidence or proof to make the jurors believe that the person on trial is innocent or guilty. Do you understand what I mean?
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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I am going to be telling you why I do not agree with the bombing of Pearl Harbor. If you do not know where Pearl Harbor is it is located in Hawaii and is where the U.S.S Arizona is.  Here are three reasons why I do not agree with the bombing of Pearl Harbor.

First of all we didn't even want to be in the war, and we did nothing tot get bombed! Japan attacked us for no reason other than to get us before we got them. We wanted to stay neutral.The author states,"The United States tried to avoid being in the war and wanted to remain neutral."

Second of all they killed  thousands of innocent people. They killed a lot of the sailors . Japan also destroyed all but three of our battle ships. The author states,"Approximately 1,100 sailors on the U.S.S Arizona were killed, which lies at the bottom of Pearl Harbor." the author also states, "All but 3 of the U.S  ships were destroyed."

Third and finally, Japan made a big enemy and added the U.S to the war. Japan added an entire country to the war and in a way Japan showed weakness cause when we joined the Japans big allies Italy and Germany joined in . The author states," This attack united  America together, and on December 8, 1941, the United states declared war on Japan because of there actions." The author also states," Japan allies , Germany and Italy, declared war on the United States three days later."

In conclusion, I do not agree  with the bombing of Pearl Harbor. I do not agree with it because Japan killed thousands of people at the bombing of Pearl Harbor. They made a big enemy. America  wanted to stay neutral and they made us start the war anyway. These  reasons  explain why I do not  agree with the bombing of Pearl Harbor.

Kendyl,
Thanks for sharing with me this week and adding the photo as well. Love to see you learning new technology! The photo is a nice touch to explain what you are writing about this week.
You had a really good piece of writing this week. I am going to teach a lesson tomorrow (Tuesday) or Thursday about making our introductions better in our writing. But overall yours wasn't too bad. You did a fantastic job giving evidence to support your reasons of why you disagree with Japan for bombing the Pearl Harbor, a territory at that time that belonged to the United States.
The biggest thing with typing on the computer that I am seeing with everyone is that people are not reading over what they are writing and look at your punctuation. You have to be really careful when typing because we can mess up with spacing, commas, and quotes, and capital letters.  I am going to be talking about  to do certain things on the computer tomorrow too, because I want to make sure everyone knows short cuts to get to certain things on the computer.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Hi Today I'm going to type whither I agree with Hitler or disagree with Hitler well I disagree with Hitler here are so reasons why.
The reason I do not agree with Hitler because one Hitler and the Nazis killed from 1933 to 1945, six million Jewish people 1million were children and they were murdered by Hitler's political party the Nazis he also killed polish people Catholic, Serbs,and handicapped people . When he captured them he put them in this place that looked like a large shower it came out gas after they would put them on fire and bring in the next group
The second is that they lock people in these apartments that had theese thing that are called the hero they had bobwire around it.People were glad to get out they would line all of them people up and say," y'all are going to go to a better place." but they didn't they went to the  resignation camp where they all will die some of them will die some won't. They would pick man that were not weak if they find out they were weak or hurt they will die.
In Conclusion I do not agree with Hitler cause what he did was wrong why would he kill six million people and one million kids .

Keniyah,
Thanks for sharing with me this week about you view on Hitler. you have a good piece going here, but the biggest thing that I need you to work on are the basics like, punctuation and capitalization. We all usually catch this when we are writing with pencil and paper, but when we type we forget certain things. You have to read back through your work to make sure you can understand what you are writing as the writer. I need you to reread everything you type. When you reread it, it allows you to see the mistakes you may have made when you are writing and helps you to see if what you wrote makes sense.  If you can't understand what you wrote and you are the one who wrote it, then those readers who read your work are not going to be able to understand what you wrote.
You did have a introduction and a conclusion. Love that you had the 4 essential things that an opinion piece needs to have. I can tell you were totally listening this week in writing. I am going to help you all with writing introductions and making them stronger this week in writing. So that will help everyone.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Do you  agree with the holocaust? No I do not here are some reasons why I do not think what Hitler thought and did.First,he killed people that was not the religion he thought,Second treated people poorly and disrespectful. Third hitler was a serial killer and killed any person who did not have blue eyes blond hair and a Germain.
Hitler was a psychopath he thought he could make the world better but just made it worse.Who ever was a different religion then him he would kill you and if you were not the things he wanted he will kill you and not in a good way.Hitler would send you to a concentration camp and you were not feed much or they did not give you anything to drink.The most saddest thing is he would kill kids and babies and millions of people in gas chambers.The would put you in this gas chamber shut the door and you think it's a shower but it's acid gas. It will burn you and kill you if you survive which is not a good chance they will shoot you straight to the head. In the text the author states, "The concentration camps were horrible some of the camps even had gas chambers." "They use these chambers to kill a mass amount of people at one time." "Poisonous gas would then be released into the chamber killing everyone up to 6,000 Jews could be killed at one time in the same chamber." This is so sad .

Hitler took a lot of people and did not treat them with respect. He would take the man above the age of 12 and keep them for work if under that age he will kill you. He did not feed them or give them something to drink he took their clothes. You slept with four people in one loft with alot more. Also half of the time to death they were not treated right. In the text war war two major events in battles the author states," The people were forced into hard labor if you were showed signs that you were weak you were quickly killed or you were left to die of starvation ."

Why would he kill people without blue eyes blond hair and is Germain. Hitler thought they would make beautiful children together. And make the world a better place but killing alot  of people. He saw that they were going to be a perfect race even though he has brown hair and not even German. In the text World war two major events and battles The author states, "he actually wanted to get rid of the weaker people and then have Aryan race to Breed,by creating the perfect race in people."

This is why I think the Holocaust is wrong because of Hitler in it and doing all of this to innocent people.

"To Miss Ray" I know I'm not supposed to number it but I could not somehow I know I'm not supposed to do that on the Georgia milestones.

Alaina,
I think you have it on bullets. I took them out for you. ;) I know that you know better, lol.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray
Alaina,
You did an amazing job in your introduction! Loved how you specifically stated your reasons as to why you disagreed with Hitler. You had a few mechanical issues with comma issues after the word "no" and the transitional words. Which we need to fix those, but overall it was an amazing job. Each paragraph had your reason and then the text evidence/examples/explanation. I can tell you were really listening to me this week when we learned about the correct format for opinion writing. So good job on this week's piece.
The only other thing I wanted to say about this piece is for you to read over the what you write. When you reread over what you write you are able to see you errors. I usually read my writing out loud, so that I can make sure I fix any errors that I may have made in my writing.
Thanks for sharing with me this week! You totally rocked it! The more you do this the better you will get.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Hi am going to be talking about if I agree or disagree  with the holocaust, I disagree with the holocaust because, Adolf Hitler he kill people who did not have blonde hair or blue eye and german I think that is wrong so wrong because he had brown hair and brown or black eyes he kill anyone in his path the author stated,"The Word holocaust means sacrifice by fire.From 1933 to 1945, six million Jewish people (I million were childern) were murder by Hitler's political party. Jewish, Polish, Catholics, Serbs,and Handicapped people. Believed that 17 million if not more innocent people were murdered."

Last reason , Hitler

Kenah,
This sure is bumming me out this week to see all of these unfinished pieces of writing and all of these capitalization and punctuation errors. What is up with you guys?
Next week, please make sure to finish your writing and write like I know you know how to. Just because we are doing it on the computer doesn't mean that you throw out what you know you are suppose to do in your writing out the window. You had the makings of a really good piece, but you didn't finish it.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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I am going to talk about why I disagree with the Holocaust. I have three reasons why.

The first reason is because 17 million people died in the holocaust. They did nothing to Hitler. So why would he do all of this?  According to the text,'' It is believed that 17 million if not more innocent people were murdered.'' That is the first reason.

The second reason is that he blamed the Jewish people for losing WWI. So your blaming another country for your country for losing a war. According to the text,'' Hitler blamed the Jewish for Germany losing the World War I. He believed that the Jewish people were less than human.'' That is the second reason.

The last reason is from 1933 to 1945, six million Jewish people, one million being children were murdered. Why would you kill one million children. According to the text,'' From 1933 to 1945 six million Jewish people (one million being children) were murdered by Hitler's political party, Nazis.'' That is the final reason.

Hope you enjoyed my opinion piece on why i agree or disagree with the Holocaust. Hope you enjoyed it

Khalil,
Thanks for sharing this week! You did a really good job at responding to the prompt this week. I love that in each paragraph you included your reason and text evidence to support your reason.
The biggest improvement that you could make on this piece would be to extend your introduction. Alaina, did a really good job this week of writing her introduction. With her assertion or opinion she also included her reasons, but she didn't go into specifics with having evidence in the introduction. We are also going to work on introductions this week focusing on opinion writing introductions. That will help you as well, so make sure you pay attention to what we are discussing and how to improve your introduction.
By the way before I finish up my response. Were you not sure how to indent? I need to explain this to the whole class, but I will tell you on here as well. If you can't use the "Tab" button to help indent, then all you need to do is to hit the "spacebar" FIVE times and that will serve as that you indented on the computer. I have notice this with a lot of people's writings on here, just help me to remember to tell all the others. Knowing certain little tricks will come in handy if you ever need it.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Do you agree with the holocaust? I don't  because what Hitler did was awful. Here are my two reasons why I disagree

My first reason is that he physically killed Jewish people,catholic people,polish people,serbia people and handicap people. 17 million if not more people were killed. 6 million Jewish people died 1million were children. The author stated,"From 1933 to 1945 6 million Jewish people(1million were children) were murdered by Hitler political party,Nazis

My final reason is that he put people in to chamber told them they were going to take a shower. What he really did was her had poisonous gases come out the shower caps ,and he made them get naked the author said,"Then the soldiers would leave and lock them up in the gas chambers.Poisonous gas would then be released into the chamber ,killing everyone. Up to 6,000 News could be killed at one time in some of the chambers.

In conclusion, Hitler was a very mean man that killed people for no reason. Hope you enjoyed!

Kaley,
I love the way you started out your introduction with a question. That is a fantastic way to hook the reader who is reading your writing. To enhance your introduction, you should take a look at Alaina's introduction this week in her writing. She listed the reasons why she disagreed with Hitler. The way she did it was an amazing way to have a powerful introduction. We will be learning more about introductions this week, so make sure you are paying close attention on how to make your introductions better in your writing.
You did indent on the first two paragraphs which I was excited about; however, you let me down on the 3-4 paragraph. Remember you always have to indent at each paragraph. It let's the readers know that you are changing your thoughts or talking about one thing and then moving on to talk about another.  Also, when you are quoting text evidence make sure that end the quotes. (Check out your second and third paragraph.) Remember in your conclusion it has to be 3-5 sentences. We will be talking about how to make our conclusions stellar, so make sure you listen up, that way you can make your conclusions better too.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Hi today I am going to tell you do I agree with the Holocaust? No I do not agree with the holocaust. The reason why I do not agree with the Holocaust is because what Adolf Hitler did like he started the Concentration Camp, and 17 million people died and they were innocent, he killed Jewish people, Catholics, Serb, and handicapped people.                                                                                                                        Second reason, is that he blamed the Jewish people for Germany losing WW 1. Because he thought that they were less than human. The only race he thought was right was Aryan people with blonde hair and blue eyes. The only thing he actually wanted to do is to get rid of weaker people and to keep Aryan people.

Third reason, is that Hitler made laws that Jews people did not have any kind of rights. Hitler did was on the night of November 9,1938 he destroyed so many Jewish people home and business it was called the ''Kristallnacht'' or ''Night of Broken Glass''.

Hitler tricked the people cause he said when he did a speech saying that he would make the place a better place, make life easier, get all of the people that  was living in the Ghettos make them get out of there so they can have a lot of space. But when they fell for it they voted for him, and when he took them to the Concentration Camp they knew there life was OVER. Then when he brought them there they was about to starve to death because of starvation. Hitler will double trick them and say oh you people haven't even taken a bath in a long time come on so you can was up, he would bring 6,000 Jews in there and say come in you and the other people can take an bath he would walk out and lock the doors and turn on the gas chamber and the gas was made with mustard seeds.

In this last paragraph when I was in 3rd grade my sister told me about what Hitler did and how he started the Concentration Camp. He was a very sick man what he did to children and adults.

Thank you for listening for what I had to say and hope you enjoy.

Celeste,
Thanks for sharing with me this week about your opinion about Hitler. I love that you indented! You have got that down to a t! So excited to see that in your writing.
We do have a few things that we need to fix though next time you write an opinion piece. Remember your introduction paragraph must be 3-5 sentences and you have to state your opinion/assertion. Your first paragraph should have been broken into two paragraphs with the first paragraph stating just your opinion and your reasons. Then in the rest of the paragraphs like you did above you state the reason and then give examples, text evidence, or explanations. However, a major standard in 5th grade is that you can quote accurately from the text. So you have to know that on the Milestones they are going to expect to see text evidence in your writing. Next time you do a writing piece make sure that you have text evidence. You did an amazing job with giving me examples and explanations, but you have to have text evidence. (You just have to!!!)
Make sure you don't say, "in this last paragraph" the reader will know it will be the last paragraph by it being the last paragraph. Does that make sense? Always check back over your work by reading it aloud or reading over it. When you do this, it will help you to catch your mistakes in your writing.
If you had to score this writing piece of yours, what would you give yourself?
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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I am going to talk about what how Hitler and what he did people that    Did not have blond hair and blue if u Did not have blond hair and blue eyes he would kill u or put you in a  place where you. Did not have that much food and he wood take your clothes and give them to soldier for  clothes and you had little food. and  then you only had your under were the women would have to go to this place that's like a oven it would eat your skin and if your still alive you would be set on fire. If you where little you would be keep for the camp to become a slave. girls you Thank its gonna be good but its not and you gonna wish you stayed at the ghetto. And if you where in the ghetto you would be put in a little room with six different family and if you wanted to go to sleep you had to go to sleep on each other person or the dirt and if you where handy cap u where went into the oven with the women and Hitler was inspired by this man name something I forgot for what he did in another country and that's why Hitler was the man he is back then Hitler was a bad man he killed over 1.5 kids and somebody killed him I was glade somebody killed Hitler for the bad things he did to people and kids and some men where keep alive to do science stuff on him and Hitler killed people and kept they shoes if you where young boy you would be killed if you where 11 you would be kept for something. Hitler was not the person that had blond hair and blue Hitler was a person that had black hair and brown eyes and if you where a kid that was at the age below 11 you would die with the girls to die Hitler was bad man that did not like jewish  people they had to hide form Hitler and his troops they would hide in a basement or they would hide in the a with there family in a big in the house and some got caught and they would be bring to the place the women died because of they where I don't no. Hitler  thought they should die. hope you enjoy my writing pie

Antwan,
Man, this could be a really good piece, but there is one thing it is man or lacking. PUNCTUATION!!!! There is only a few periods, without punctuation you can stop or pause when reading your piece. This is why have punctuation is important, in order to read this you would have to read all of it in one breath. Can you do that? Because I cannot at all!!!
The other thing that this piece needs is capitalization at the beginning of sentences. But you don't know when to capitalize at the beginning of a sentence if you don't have punctuation.
My question to you and some others is do you guys know how to capitalize and use punctuation keys when you are typing, because
I  know that can be confusing if you are not use to it. I will be going over some shortcuts this week on how to do certain things when you are typing, so make sure you are listening.
What would you give yourself on this piece of writing? What else are you missing? Write me back and let me know.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Today I'm gonna tell you guys some information about Hitler.... to start me off I do not agree with the Holocaust.                                               Adolf Hitler was born 20 April 1889 in Braunau am Inn, a town in Austria-Hungary ( in present day Austria), close to the boarder with the German Empire. He was one of the six children born to Alois Hitler and Klara Polz (1860-1907)

Ma'kayla,
This sure is bumming me out this week to see all of these unfinished pieces of writing and all of these capitalization and punctuation errors. What is up with you guys?
Next week, please make sure to finish your writing and write like I know you know how to. Just because we are doing it on the computer doesn't mean that you throw out what you know you are suppose to do in your writing out the window. You had the makings of a really good piece, but you didn't finish it.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Dear Ms.Ray

I am going to be writing about the book, The Eiffel Tower- Fun Facts. This book was really interesting because I LOVE Paris and The Eiffel Tower. I  want to go there some day so I was excited to find this story.

First, do you know when the Eiffel tower was constructed? I do! In 1889. The author stated,'' It was constructed in 1889 to  commemorate  the centennial of the French Revolution and to flaunt France's industrial prowess before the world.'' So they made a beautiful landmark just to flaunt their industrial prowess. Another fact is, do you know who they named the Eiffel tower after? I know that too! Gustave Eiffel. Why you may ask? Well the author said,'' The Eiffel Tower was named after Gustave Eiffel a French civil engineer who is credited with the design of this tower.''

Second, The Eiffel Tower used to be the tallest, man made land mark in the world until another came as the author stated,'' It measures 1,050 feet in height and held the record for being the tallest man made structure in the world for almost 40 years before being out shined by the Chrysler Building in New York.'' That is pretty impressive for a man made building. Something else, is that it weighs SO much. As the author stated,''It is made of iron, and weighs about 10,000 tons.'' That is so heavy for being the second largest man made structure in the world.

Third, you know how iron will rust from chemicals and oxygen, well to keep their precious land mark looking good, they have to paint the entire Eiffel Tower as the author stated,'' It is painted after every seven years to protect from rust. About 50 tones of paint is used to paint the entire tower. It is painted in three shades of brown, darkest at the bottom and brightest at the top.'' That is SO much paint. I mean who ever gets paid to do that must make lot of money.

In conclusion, The Eiffel Tower is well cared for even to this day. It was made for a interesting reason.I can't wait to tell you more about it when I will do the rest of the book next week and maybe the week after too.

Love <3 <3 <3

Aubrey Y.

Aubrey,
Thanks for sharing with me this week! It was very interesting to learn about the Eiffel Tower. Have to say this is probably your BEST writing piece this year. I was so impressed by your writing. You had text evidence, an introduction, indenting, and a conclusion. You did a spectacular job on citing the evidence correctly in your writing and it went what you were telling the readers about. So IMPRESSIVE!
I can't believe that they actually have to paint it every seven years. I would so not to do that job. You would have to not be an acrophobic. (Quiz bowl  word, lol) Can you imagine how long it would take? Whew, that would be such a hard job to do!  I enjoyed reading your journal entry this week. I can't wait to learn more.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

P.S. When we are typing what do you do to titles of text that you are reading?

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No, I strongly disagree with the Holocaust. Do you agree? Well , I don't cause they burned people on fire ,put people in gas Chambers ,and locked you in the ghetto.

One of the ways the Holocaust killed people where to burn them alive. The author States ,"While others were thrown into ovens or open burning pits some where given to the care of Nazi doctors." To make that even worse they slept over 6,000 body ashes away and went to kill 6,000 more people.

The worst one by far is the gas chambers,one of the worst parts was when they lied and made people believe that they were taking showers ,but in reality they were about to breathe poisonous gas. The author stated," poisonous gas would then be released into the chamber ,killing everyone."

The ghetto is a word that we use now that mean something totally different than what it was used back in the 1940s. The ghetto was used in the 1940s to explain a home that had 50+ people living in it you where also barbed wired in ,so you couldn't escape. You where left with little food and little water,so you would starve to death.
The author States," If you showed that you were weak you were quickly killed or you were left to die of starvation."

So, those are my reasons why I don't agree with the Holocaust.

Ms. Ray I didn't mean to post the first one I would never do that. I had trouble with the app yesterday ,so it would not let me back out of it and delete it.

Alannah,
Thanks for sharing with me this week I enjoyed reading your writing! You are fine, I kind of figured that after I saw your most recent post. We need to fix it though, maybe explain it to me tomorrow what it is doing.
You did a great job writing this week. I loved your introduction because you stated your reasons as to why you disagreed with what Hitler did. We are going to be working on introductions this week to help you write them, so that they engage the readers from the first word. Make sure you are paying attention, so you can learn how to take your introductions from good to great.
The biggest thing to work on this week is for you to go back and reread over what you write. By doing this it will help you to find your mistakes that you may have missed while you were writing it.
I am also going to tell you keyboarding tricks to help you when you are typing.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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I disagree with the Holocaust because Adolf Hitlerwas supposed to be a leader,he didn't like people that didn't have blonde hair and blue eyes,and hated Jewish people.The says ,"The Holocaust was one of the most terrible events to ever occur in our world's history."What I am about to explain is going to backup what that says.

The first reason is that Adolf Hitler is supposed to be a leader. Based on I read ,"It began January 30,1933 when Adolf Hitler was the leader of  Germany.From 1933 to1945, six million Jewish people were murdered by Hitler's  political party,Nazis." That is sad how you are supposed to be a leader but are killing people. I am pretty sure leaders are supposed to help people to prevent being killed.

The second reason is that he did not like people who didn't have blonde hair and blue eyes .In page 3 the author said," There one race whom Hitler thought was superior and that race was the Aryan race or people with blonde hair and blue eyes."That is being racist to me .

The final reason is that he hated jewish people .From reading I know that ,"From 1933 to 1945,six million Jewish people were murdered by Hitler' political party,Nazis." Why did he kill so many people.

In conclusion, he wasn't acting like a leader,hated people that didn't have blonde hair and blue eyes,and killed many Jewish people.

Tiki,
Thanks for sharing with me this week! I love that you have the paragraphs and indenting for the most part. (I will be showing you all some key boarding tricks this week to help you all with your writing.) I love how you told me your reason, then gave the text evidence, but you didn't stop there you went and on to talk about your feeling about the reason. I love being able to hear your voice in your writing. I can feel the emotion behind the words.
The biggest thing that I need you to fix is for you to reread what you write. The wording in the first paragraph is a little confusing or discombobulated. I know you would have caught this if you would have reread what you wrote.
We are going to be talking about introductions and conclusions in the weeks to come. So make sure you are listening to gain some new knowledge to make your intros and conclusions POP!
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

P.S. Don't forget that intros and conclusions have to be 3-5 sentences.

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Dear Ms.Ray

I will be telling you more facts about the Eiffel Tower from the book The Eiffel Tower-Fun Facts. I did not tell you all the author stated last time.

First, you know that they have to clean the Eiffel Tower. I know what you are thinking. How much cleaning supplies do they need to clean the Eiffel tower? It is the second largest man made building in the world (read my last entry to find out more). The author stated, "It takes over 4 tons of dusters & cleaning rags, 400 liters of detergent, and 25,000 bin bags to clean the Eiffel tower." So, do you want to know something cool? Have you heard of magic? Well lets just say the Eiffel tower has magical powers. I bet you are wondering what I mean. Well the author stated, "The heat of the sun causes the Eiffel tower to grow 6 inches."

Second, I love the pictures of the Eiffel tower at night. Why you may ask? Because the Eiffel tower Is covered in lights as the author stated, "There are more than 5 billion lights on the Eiffel tower." I have always wondered how people get to the top of the Eiffel tower. The information from this book made me believe that you would be bewildered at the results as the author stated," The Eiffel tower is 108 stories with 1,710 steps. However, tourists can only climb to the first platform. There are two huge elevators to take the tourists to the upper platforms." Since we are talking about the elevators. How about I tell you how far they go in a year? As the author stated," These elevators cover a distance of around 103,000 KM in a year, Which is about 2.5 times the circumference of the entire earth."

Third fact I'd like to share. The Eiffel Tower is more than just a tall tower. Did you think  it was just a tower? No, it is a very famous one. Many places are in the Eiffel tower as the author stated," The tower also houses two restaurants, several buffets,  a banquet hall, a champagne bar, and many unique gift shops." That is many places to see! But when can you see them? Any day you want to. The author stated," It is open for tourists and visitors 365 days a year."

In conclusion, the Eiffel tower has facts about it that not many people know. I did not know some of them so explore the things that interest you.

Love <3<3<3

Aubrey Y.

Dear Aubrey,
Your last piece is going to be hard to TOP, is was a breath of fresh air, I fell in love with it!!! But let's take a look at what you wrote this week...
The first thing that stood out was that you remembered what you were to do to a title of a book!!! Woot-Woot!!! You are so right, it has to be in Italics. However, the introduction POPPED off the page last week and this week it kind fell flat. It didn't intrigue me like it did last week when I read the introduction for this week. Make sure to watch the video on Wednesday with  the sub ad pay attention to the part in the video about the HOOKS and how you can get readers of your work to say, "Wow, this kid can write! I have to read more!!!!" If you need to watch it again it is on my YouTube channel.
The second, third and fourth paragraph was on POINT!! I could not have written it better myself! I loved hearing your voice in your writing, the details and the text/author based evidence was amazing. It was great!!! My ONLY improvement would for you to change out the repetition of "the author stated" you don't want  keep repeating the same thing over and over. We call that redundant and if our writing becomes redundant our readers will get bored. (WE can't have the readers of our work being BORED!!!)
I am teaching a lesson in the YouTube video about this and I give other things you can use besides writing the author stated.
I love the last sentence in your conclusion!!! Those kind of statements are what they are wanting on the Milestones in your writing. Another way to say what you said is, "So take a chance and dive into the things that interest you." (Am I telling you to literally dive into Paris? No, not at all! It has nothing to do with a pool or diving, lol.) The only improvement that could be made about your writing piece is that you include 3-5 sentences about what you stated in the introduction. We will be working a lot more with conclusions next week. So pay attention closely nohow to make your conclusions leave a lasting impression on the ones who read your work.
<3<3<3,
Ms. Ray

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Aniyah,
Thanks for sharing with me this week. I like how you uploaded your journal entry on here through a photo.
You had an introduction, reasons with text evidence, and a conclusion. You also had indenting and you did state your opinion on the issue.
However, their were sentence errors that could have been fixed if you would have read over what you wrote. You guys have got to reread what you write, before books are turned into books they are read over and over to check for errors of all kinds.
Another thing to look at is how you put all of the reasons in one paragraph. You have to split up the reasons in multiple paragraphs. Each time you have a new reason and evidence, you have to have a new paragraph. A person who did this really well this week was Alaina. (Kendyl and Alannah did it well too!) Look at their writing, that is what I am wanting and what they will expect on the Milestones.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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What happened on D-day? Well I am hear to explain what happened. Here is some background information on World War2. World war 2 happened when Adolf Hitler was trying to take of Asia. We got involved when Japan bombed Pearl Harbor.

First, a wave off army man jumped out of a plane in the middle of the night and landed in the German's territory. They started to capture bridges. Also the allied forces dropped thousands of dummies to trick the dummies.The author states,"First, a wave of paratroopers jumped during the night and landed behind the enimy lines. While behind the enimy linesthe were to destroy and capture bridges. They also dropped thousands of dummies to confuse the Germans."

Next,the Allied powers dropped thousands of bombed on some old the German defenses.The author states,"Next thousands of planes dropped bombed on the German defenses." The war was absolutely crazy.

Then, warships started to bomb beaches from the sea. At the same time the French were cutting telephone lines and destroying bridges. The author states,"Then,eat ships began to bomb beaches from the water. While that was happening the French Resistance cut the Geman telephone lines and destroyed bridges."

Finally, the main the main forces invaded. Then over 6,000 carrier ships came with troops and weapons. Omaha beach was invaded. The author states," Finally, the main force invaded next. Over 6,000 ships carrying troops, weapons,tanks, and extra equipment landed on the beaches of Normandy. While Normandy was being taken, the Omaha and Utah beaches were being invaded by America troops."

In conclusion, D-day was definitely a long , hard,painful, and very top secret. It was very complex as you see we had a lot of steps to win. That is all about the steps it took to do D-day

Hey,
Thanks for sharing with me this week! You did a great job hooking the reader's attention with your question you asked in the introduction. I do like how you gave the reader some background knowledge or schema.
Remember to check over your information, Hitler wasn't trying to take over Asia, he was trying to take over Europe, whereas Japan was trying to take control of Asia. When you are writing informatively, you have to make sure you have the information you are sharing is valid, or true.
Also, in your paragraphs you had great transition words or lining words at the beginning of your paragraphs. I noticed that you didn't indent was there a reason or was it a glitch with Padlet? Just let me know, I think I remember you saying something to me about it. But, I can't remember if that was you or not. In that first paragraph, make sure you are specific next time because if someone didn't know what troops landed, they would have no clue that is was the Allied forces. With informational writing you have to remember that people may not know what you know, so you have to be specific in the details, does that make sense?
Don't forget when you are quoting that text evidence make sure you change up what you say when you say "The author states". You want to have a variety and not repetition.
Your conclusion was well written, you did have 3-5 sentences. We will be working on writing well written conclusions next week.
Please make sure you ALWAYS read and check over your works. There were some simple errors that could have been avoided. Overall, your piece was well written, I would have given it a 3. What do you think you would have received on it?
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Today I am going to write about what happened on D-Day.  This is one of the important parts of history. It started on June 6th, 1944.

The Allied forces all attacked Germany's troops on the coast of Normandy, France. Over 150,000 soldiers attacked Germany's troops.
According to the text,'' The Allied forces (Britain, America, Canada, and France) all attacked Germany's forces on the coast of Normandy, France. Over 150,000 soldiers attacked and gained victory that against Germany."

The invasion of D-Day was planned for months, but was almost canceled because of bad weather. Even though there was bad weather, General Eisenhower agreed to attack. Because of bad weather the Germans did not think they would attack. According to the text,'' The invasion of D-Day was planned for months, however, it was almost canceled.

Khalil,
Thanks for sharing with me this week! Your introduction could have had a HOOK, for the first sentence. Remember you want to grab the readers attention with the first sentence. You want them to say, "WOW, this kid can write!!" You have to make them ooo and ohhh! In your introduction you could have given the reader a little bit of schema on this topic. You have to remember, people who are reading your work, don't know what you know.
You had a great start in your writing, but I felt as if the piece wasn't finished. This left me a little bummed. Remember ito get a n order to get a 3-4 you have to have a conclusion included in your writing to be awarded the points for having a conclusion.
What would you have given yourself as a grade for this piece of writing?
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Today I'm going to type about what happens on D-DAY and I will tell you what happened.
D-DAY was the invasion of Normandy it happened on June 6,194  over 150,000 soldiers attack in gained Victory against Germany the invasion of the D-day was playing for mouths however it was cancelled due to bad weather. General Eisenhower who fought and led Americans a great to attack because of bad weather.
Now I'm going to tell you how they fought . The first wave of parachuters jump during the night to the enemy's line and then they drop dummies to confuse and tricked the Germans.Next, thousands of  planes drop bombs on Germans defense then the warships should begin to bomb the beaches from the water.  Then they cut the phone lines and bombed the railroads.
In Conclusion, what happened on D-Day was they planes a war to attack the Germans then paratroopers jump out the airplane at night at the enemy lines and dropped dummies to confuse and trick the Germans then thousands of planes will bomb Germans defense the warships will bomb beaches and they will cut the phone lines and bomb the railroads.

Keniyah,
Thanks for sharing with me this week! Remember what we learned today about having those amazing HOOKS, that is what I need from you in that first paragraph. You have to hook your reader into what you are going to tell them about and that introduction has to be 3-5 sentences. So, as we practice in class how to write these amazing introductions apply it in your writing to me weekly, alright? Don't forget about saying you are going to type or tell, YOU have to say I will be writing about because you are writing your response to the question that was asked or to the prompt that was given to you to write about.
You did a fantastic job recounting the events that happened on that day and I love that you added the picture below. However, if you are going to write a informative piece like this, what do you have to have to make what you say true or valid? (ANSWER: Text/Author's Based Evidence) On the Milestones they will expect your opinion or informative piece to have text evidence, mostly because that is a MAJOR 5th grade learning target that we have to learn. By the end of 5th grade, you have to be able to quote accurately from the text. In order to get a 3-4 on the writing part,  you have to have TBE/ABE.  You wrote this sentence in your first paragraph, which by the way is a fantastic sentence!!! But to write this sentence correctly you need a ;(semicolon) in front of however and a ,(comma) behind the word however when you use it in a sentence. (You will learn this 10-12th grade and in college, but I wanted to teach it to you now since I saw it in your writing.) I wrote the correct version of your sentence below:

D-DAY was the invasion of Normandy it happened on June 6,194  over 150,000 soldiers attack in gained Victory against Germany the invasion of the D-day was playing for months; however, it was cancelled due to bad weather.

For you conclusion you did a good job as well, because you restated what you wrote about, loved seeing you do that! :) Thanks again for sharing, I enjoyed reading your writing this week.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Ms. Ray
Today I will be talking about a book cause its something that I have never done before and also I want to try something new for once so the story's is actually a five nights at Freddy's novel so I'm gonna make it short #itsover500pages  so its a bright sunny day there's a party going on in a restaurant named Freddy fazbears pizza a kid named crying child is looking at kids celebrating a private party while starring at the party and kids and a guy named William Afton murders the child the soul of zed child was still alive that got transferred into an animatronic named puppet in a future pizzeria but lets go back in the past to the party the crying child was starring at so William Afton went in the pizzeria and went into spring lock suits (animatronic suits that humans can fit into and pretend to be animatronic suits) so he went into the spring lock suits and murdered 5 more children then one of the animatronics named Fredbear accidently bit another child and he got his frontal lobe bite off he went to the hospital and he ended up coming back in the fourth version of the GAME and that's were I'm going to stop for today cause I think I have more than two pharagraphs.

Jenit,
Thanks for sharing with me this week about what you were reading about. It sounds like an interesting read.
Biggest problem with this piece, there is NO PUNCTUATION or CAPITALIZATION! I may need to get Antwan o talk with you about this because he fixed his beautifully this week. You only have one period in this whole piece of writing. You say you think it is 2 paragraphs; however, you only indented one time, so technically based on what you wrote it is only one paragraph. Dude, we can't write like this you have to go back and check over your work! I need for you to go back and edit this piece, putting the correction punctuation and capitalization in this writing. It does bum me out, because I know what you truly can do! Please fix this writing this week, so I can see what you can truly do as a writer. Think like this every time you write, if this were on the Milestones how would I write this? What would you have given yourself if you had to grade this piece of writing on the Milestones.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Kaelah,
Can I tell you how much I LOVE your introduction this week! It is 3-5 sentences, you explained what you were going to write about, and gave the reader of your writing a little bit of schema about what they were about to read about? (THIS MAKES you VIP status in your class with Jordan this week! WOOT WOOT!) I really like that you said I am going to write, and that you did not say talk, tell, say, or said.
You started your first paragraph out strong. Remember "the second event" needs a comma after event because that is a transition/linking word(s) you are using to transfer the reader of your writing your next paragraph. The biggest issue I am see in this paragraph is the text/author's based evidence. You had a great intro to the text based evidence. However, the text evidence has to match what you said above it. Did you write about the places they bombed above your text evidence? The reason it has to match because it helps your writing to flow when a reader is reading it. Same with the second paragraph, by you not saying that some of the paratroopers were dummies and this was done to confuse the Germans, your text evidence could be taken to mean that all of the paratroopers were dummies. Does that make sense?
Next week, we will be working a lot more on conclusions in our writing and having them have 3-5 sentences. Just like you did an amazing job in that introduction, you have to do the same in the conclusion to give the reader of your writing a final thought of, "That kid can write, I can't forget their piece, it was phenomenal."
I enjoyed reading your writing this week. Totally impressed how you uploaded your word document on here by the way! NICE! :)
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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This week I read a book called,"Babushka's Doll" by Patrica Polacco. The story is about a girl named Natasha that is not patient for her grandmother."Grandmother push me on the swing.''she said, but she was too busy too push her on the swing.A little later she got hungry,''Babushka,I'm hungry.''When babushka was done,she told Natasha ,''Now we can eat.'' when she took the kettle from the high shelf,she saw a little doll next to it.''Is that your doll babushka?'' ''Yes dear it was my doll.'' ''Did you play with her all the time? ''No dear just once only once''. Natasha was done with her soup she asked,''Can i play with the doll now?'' Babushka took it down from the shelf .'' I am going to the store for groceries you can play with the doll until I get back.''So she did.As soon as the door closed the little doll jumped up and started to dance. For a moment Natasha was scared, but then the doll said,''Come on Tash let's go out and play!'' They started running until Natasha couldn't run no more,''Come on Tash let's play.'' If the doll told Natasha to do something she would do it. ''I want to go on the swing.'' ''HIGHER'' then the doll said,'' Now I want to eat.'' Natasha made tea and soup,but the doll spilled and splooshed it all around she began to laugh but then cried,''AHHHHHHHHH My dress is all dirty !!!!!!!!!''She washed it and ironed it and then put it back on the doll.''You didn't do it right it's all wrinkled!'' ''I'm just a little girl.I WISH YOU WERE A DOLL AGAIN!!!'' Then babushka came back, ''My darling girl what is wrong'' she told what happened,but the doll was just a doll.''From now on you can play with her any time you want.'' ''No thank you babushka once is enough.'' babushka picked up the doll and whispered,''Looks like you had quite a day.'' The doll winked and went back on the shelf.

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Today I am going to tell you what happened on D-Day and I will tell you more...

What happen on D-Day is that the invasion of Normandy happened on June 6,1944.What happen was that France all attacked Germany forces on the coast of the Normandy France. Over 150,000 soldiers attacked and gained the victory that they had against Germany.

Next,  a wave of paratroopers had jumped at night and landed behind the enemy line. When the enemy line had been destroy key targets and then they capture bridges. And then the Allied Forces drooped fake dummies that was dolls and they would dress up the dummies and drop them and they would have clothes on and have parachutes, and the Axis Forces would shoot the dummies. he Allied wanted to confused them and better yet they did tricked them.

My conclusion is that what happened on D-Day is that planes  dropped bomb on German. Warships begin to bomb the beaches from the water. While all of this was going on what happen was that French cut the German telephone lines and destroyed the railroads.

Celeste,
Thanks for sharing this week with me on Padlet! I love seeing you guys use the technology!!!
Alright, you know I have to say something about that introduction because we were talking about it all today!!! LOL. You are not talking to someone when you are writing like this, so we CAN'T say the words tell, say, or talk! We have to say words like writing or sharing. We also talked today about those introductions having 3-5 sentences and those amazing hooks. You had a little bit of a hook when you put the ...(ellipses) in that introduction. (That was smooth!)
You did a good job of writing what about what happened on D-Day. However, it is missing something to make what you are saying true or valid. (HINT: TBE/ABE) You guessed it! You have to have that text/author's based evidence to support what you are saying, so others will believe you. You have to have it in your writing and make sure that you know how to do it correctly! Because on the Milestones that is what they are going to be looking for in your writing of your opinion or informational writing piece. I know you can do it and that you know how to do it. (I have seen it in your writing before. The more practice you have at it, the better you become at it. Let me see you do it in your writing.)
Your conclusion was well written, but if you could have included one of the sentences that Kendyl wrote in hers or even if I could take both of your conclusion and put them together, you guys would have a well written conclusion. It would be one of the best I have seen so far this year. Next week, we will be learning more about how to write conclusions and make yours POP of that page, so that the reader who is reading your writing is stunned by how well it is written! So make sure to pay attention and hang onto every word when we learn how to make those conclusion breath-taking! :)
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Today i'm going to talk about  D-day lets begin.      D-day was the day Allied   forces attacked Germany's forces and it was at coast of Normandy there where 150,000 solider that attacked and won against Germany. The allied forces something went wrong in the war Germany tried to do something they tried to take over the neighboring county and they did it they took over neighboring county then they took over France, and then they took over great Britain.  And the troops gathered together to get there weapons to fight and they attacked German with a air strikes with a lot of increased bombings. On the Germans they did it on railroads,bridges,airfields,and other places they bombed to stop Germany form advancing. The Germans new that something was bigger and was going on because they saw the soldiers  gathering and the additional  air strikes  and bombing that was taking place daily. The Germans  did not no what to do they thought they where going to attack pas de Calais which was in the Normandy.  The invasion of D-day it was planned  for months however it was cancelled and it was going to be due  because of bad weather General Eisenhower who led the Americans agreed to attack because of the bad weather the Germans thought they where not going to attack so they where not prepared for what was will happened next. The soldiers  jumped during the night behind the enemy lines they destroyed the key targets and they capture  bridges Allied forces also dropped thousands of dummies to trick and confuse the Germans too. next thousands of planes dropped bomb the Germans defenses then warships begin to bomb warships they begin to dropped it in the water while all of that was going the french resistance they cut the telephone line and destroyed there railroad  the troops invade over 6,000 ships carrying troops,weapons,tanks,and extra stuff and some stuff landed on beaches.united states lost there lives that day but they did finally succeed at taking Omaha.                                               hope you like you my writing.

Antwan,
The first thing I noticed about your writing this week was the fact you TRULY listened to me last week about the capital letters and punctuation  at the end of a sentence!!! :)   I may need you to help someone and show them how you changed your writing from last week to this week, okay.
However, you did take the text I wrote and changed some of the wording, but much of what I wrote you copied from the text you were given.  If you do what you did above on the Milestones, they will give you a grade of CT, which stands for CopiedText. A really easy way to stop copying from the text is to read a page, close the book, and then retell what you read in your own words. Does that make sense? I want you to understand how to do this like I suggested you to, because I don't want them to score your writing as CT. Get in the practice now of reading a page, closing the book, and then write about what you read. Then once you finish, open it back up, read a page, close the book, and write about what you read. Keep doing this until you are finished. You can only use the book for Text/Author's Based Evidence. Next week, try this strategy to help you not to copy the text, okay? I am looking forward to see what your true writing looks like, I can't wait!!!
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Charon Vincent Th Mouse And The Motorcycle

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Charon Vincent Th Mouse And The Motorcycle

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Ralph left the motorcycle there how was he going to tell Keith. He told Keith  was mad he didn't even want to talk to him.  Keith was leaving in 3 more days how was Ralph going to get food for his family?

Ralph went to find an aspirin for him down stairs. Ralph got caught by the maid!!!!!Oh No! Ralph was shook in vine trees on the side of the hotel. How was Ralph going to get back in?  To Be Continued...............

Charon,
Alright man, this a little weak for me this week. I need for you to give me more in your own words. What I want you to get in the practice now of reading a page, closing the book, and then write about what you read. Then once you finish, open it back up, read a page, close the book, and write about what you read. Keep doing this until you are finished. Try this for me this week if you are going to write about what text your are reading. I would like to see how how your writing changes from this week to the next week.
I did enjoy the expression of the characters that you used. I think that is a good way to show how your characters feel in the text about an event that has happened.
I look forward to seeing you use the strategy I discussed above in your writing for next week.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Dear Ms.Ray,
Today I am going to talk about D-day. Read on to here about it.
Hope you enjoy.

First, D-day happened on June 16, 1944. D-day was an attack on German forces in Normandy, France. It was the turning point of World War 2. In the text the author said," The Allied forces all attacked Germany's forces on the coast of Normandy, France. This victory was the turning point of war.

Second, a lot of paratroopers had jumped out of planes and landed behind the enemy line. When the enemy line destroyed key targets and then they capture bridges, and then the Allied Forces dropped fake dummies that would be dressed up as actual solders and they would fall and look like real soldiers and the Germans would shoot them and thank they where real people, so the Allied powers tricked Germany.

In conclusion, I talked about D-day and what happened. The Allied powers really did trick Germany. Hope you enjoyed.

Will,
Finally, I know!!! LOL, I have finally gotten to your piece to respond. I do apologize for doing it so late.
Remember what I said about talking, you aren't have a conversion with the person who is reading your work, so you can't say "tell". You have to say "write, writing, sharing". Don't forget to leave off that hope you enjoy. I love seeing that in your writing because that means you are proud of your work and you want me to be happy with what you wrote. However, the Milestones people aren't as warm and fuzzy as I am, they just want to see if you can WRITE based on what they read of yours. For that introduction, it is really weak. Think about what we learned today in class. Use one of those HOOKS to grab your reader's attention. You have to on the Milestones or you will be forgettable. You have to grab the reader's attention and make them think, "Dude, this kid is legit, he can WRITE! That's how you do it!!" In your journal for next week, make this introduction of yours JUMP off the page at me!
The first paragraph was looking great, until I got to the end and noticed you didn't have an ending quotation marks!!! Man, you so know you have to have those closing quotation marks at the end of your text/author's based evidence. The way to fix that is to slow down, and check over your work by reading through it. You will find those mistakes that you have if you will reread what you write. One of the major standards/learning targets in 5th grade is for you to be able to quote accurately. You didn't on this part, that one little closing quotation mark will tell someone you don't know how to do that standard. When I know you know how, you were just rushing. But you see when they read your work, they don't know you like I do, they don't know that you were rushing and didn't check over your work. So you have to think about things from the point of view of the person who is reading and grading what you wrote about. You need to have text/author's based evidence more than one time in your writing, it lets the reader of you work know, that you know what you are talking about because you quoted from the text more than once!!!
For your conclusion you could have given more and told me more about what your wrote about. You have to have 3-5 sentences. I did enjoy how you said the the Allied Powers tricked Germany. If you would have given me more of those types of sentences your conclusion would have been stellar!  What would you rate yourself on this piece of writing?
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Reading-Writing Journal for week of 1-23-27-2017

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Reading-Writing Journal for week of 1-23-27-2017

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Write 2 paragraphs in your homework journal about the social studies passage/book (TOPIC-Descriptive/Informational: Explain the cause(s)  of the Cold War.) or write a 2 paragraph summary about what you have read about  in a  book that you are reading. It is due on Friday.

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Today I will be writing to you about what I read in my book called " Gallagher Girls". I have read almost the intire series and it is about spies. In the previous books Cammie has found out the members of the circle who they are and where that live.

So, Cammie has found out that Preston Winters has nothing to do with his dad's business which is of course the Circle. Someone just tried to kill Fannie and her mom is doing therapy for and injured teacher. The teacher is named Joe Solomon.

Then, Cammie's mom almost got caught helping him because anyone who is not Zack Cammie's boy friend or her close friends Bex or Macy doesn't know that Joe Solomon is alive. They don't know because he almost got crushed by a mountain.

That is what I have read. If you enjoyed some of this it is called "Gallagher Girls ".
It is for all ages even my mom likes it.

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Ralph had to leave it their or he could risk his life. Ralph left the motorcycle there.  When he told Kieth he was irate at Ralph he didn't even want to talk to him.

Ralph went to find an aspirin for him. Kieth was still irate with Ralph but Kieth forgave hm. Ralph went to go get the motorcycle he got it he got caught. Is this the Ralph? TO BE CONTNUIED............

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Today I am going to inform you the causes of the Cold War. So pay attention and read.
First is the Proxy War, countries and the sides had earned support from the superpower. The Soviet Union or the United States. But the Korean War, Vietnam War, last the Yom Kipper War are the example of the Proxy war.
Second, even after the war the Allied Powers destroyed the Soviet Union because the leadership under Joseph Stalin and spread of between the Soviet Union and the other Allied Powers and then the Cold War was born.
Third, the Arm Race was next. It was the United States and the Soviet Union. They both had super powers and they were competing  with each other like they was going to war. They both had the good weapons to use. Both sides spent billions of billions of dollars on the nuclear bomb.
Fourth, the Space War. The Space War was when the USS and the USSR competed . In 1955 the Space Race began when both countries announced to the world that they would be sending satellites into orbit in the space.
Last, the Red Scare, The Bay of Pigs. First the Red Scare is this man and he wanted to find people that was communist and if someone says someone is communist he would get them and ask them questions  and try to make them say that they are communist and 10o through 100 percent they would go to prison. Next is the Bay Of Pigs, it was to prevent communism from taking controls in the Americas.
My Conclusion is that the Cold War was a longer period of conflict from 1945 until 1991.

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1/26/17 January . 26th ,2017

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Dear Ms.Ray,
Do you know what caused the Cold War? Well I do, and I am going to write to you the causes of the Cold War. Read on to see the causes...
To Begin with and Lastly,(there was only one reason in the book) Communism. Communism is where one leader is able to take stuff away (examples: clothes, houses, money)and that happened in the Soviet Union and the Allied powers tried to stop it. Based on what i read the author said,"even after the war, the Allied powers distrusted the Soviet Union because of the leadership under Joseph Stalin and the spread of communism. This distrust caused tension between the Soviet Union and the other Allied powers and the Cold War was born.
In conclusion,  now you should no what caused the Cold War. Communism was terrible it even lead to the Berlin wall or the Iron Curtain.

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Dear Ms.ray,
Do you know what caused the Vietnam War? It was caused by a communism government in North Vietnam and a Democratic government in South Vietnam.
First, North Vietnam wanted to expand Communism into South Vietnam. That would have been bad for South Vietnam. North Vietnam won, so since North Vietnam won the spreed of communism spread into all of Vietnam. So now Vietnam is now a Communist country.
In conclusion, I talked about what caused the Vietnam war and who won. So now Vietnam is a communism country

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The Third Wheel  by: Jeff Kinney
Today i will be Typing about the Third wheel  by: Jeff Kinney.also all about what goes on in the book ,so yeah i hope you enjoy!

In The book Diary of a wimpy kid third wheel Greg goes to a dance with a girl named Abigal but, Rowely came along so he was the third wheel. Abigal and Rowley became bf and gf after the dance. in the end you can see that Rowely Changed lot because of Abigal.for example: the way he comb's his hair and the way his shirt look.He even Ditched Greg at lunch to sit with Abigal.

alright so enough about Abigal and now to Greg and Rowely.
At lunch Rowely and Greg sit at the lunch table ,and blow bubbles in thier Chocolate milk. Also in the Book greg got startled when he saw his uncle gary at the door. He was their because he needed a place to stay after he used all his money to buy out a guys t shirt shop. he didn't know their was a typo until it was to late ,and the guy was no were to be found.Also Rowely Ran For Social Chairs person because it sounded cool to him.

Ok so lets review on what i typed about. I typed about Rowely Abigal Greg and Uncle Gary. have a good night everybody.

P.S Mrs. Ray i did this at 9:17 at night. Your Welcome

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Dear Ms.Ray

I am going to be writing about the book What Do They? Veterinarians. The book was very interesting because I have always wanted to be a vet so having the facts from this book has really helped me better under stand what a vet dells with.

There are certain reasons you should bring your pet to the vet like is they will not eat, always sleeps, or will not go to the bathroom. For instance the author stated, ''You notice that your dog has been sleeping a lot lately i think he is felling well. You tell your mother. Mom bends down to look at the dog. I think you are right she says. lets take him to the veterinarian to make sure.''

You know when the animal first comes it always does not like you after a while it will have to learn that you are here to help her/him just like the author wrote, ''Treating animals takes practice. Animals may not understand that the vet is they to help them. They might try to bite or runaway. Vets also need to be good with pet owners. They try to answer the owners questions.''

Vets do not always see dogs,cats,hamsters,rabbits, and birds.. They also see uncommon pets. On page 3 the author wrote, ''Vets might see dogs, cats, and birds. Some people have uncommon pets though. These might be lizards or ferrets. while other vets treat cows, goats,sheep,chicken,or horses.''

in conclusion, from what i have written or typed about i hope this will help you see that it is not all fun and games for vets. stay tuned for my next piece so you can read about the rest of the book.

LOVE<3<3<3<3
Aubrey Y.

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I read about Ever After High the story book of legends. legacy year is about high school students preparing to follow there parents footstep. To know more about it read my next 3 paragraphs.

Legacy year is about this girl Raven Queen not wanting to follow her mother steps becoming the next Evil Queen. If Raven do not sign the story book of legends she may vanish. Raven dose not want to poison Apple White. Raven is not evil like her mother she is kind like her father. Raven does not know what will happen to her if she dose not sign the story book of legends.

Apple white daughter of Snow White yearns for  Raven to sign the story book of legends. Apple White are good frriends,but Raven not wanting to sign the story book of legends might change that. Raven and Apple are getting ready to sign their books. All of the sons and daughters of a prince, princess, and villains.

In conclusion would love talk about my rating for this book. I would give the book 5 golden stars. It was very entertaining especially the long chapters. The genre of my book is fantasy or traditional literature .

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Today I will be talking about the Vietnam war. The war causes its located in southeast Asia it borders china and it runs  to north Cambodia and runs to west and Laos to the east. I say where was the cause of the war the Vietnam war was a proxy war  that was fought to spread Communism. The north Vietnam and south Vietnam looked the same so you could not tell them apart so they did not no if you where on there side and north Vietnam was supported by republic of the county china and the united states supported south Vietnam. South Vietnam  wanted there rights and the north wanted some one like Hitler and the united states joined the proxy war  but north Vietnam was good at  traps the united states did  not no that the united states lost the war after world war 2 they belonged to France after world war japan took over the Vietnam after world war 2 they wanted to be a free state   and the allied forces said they should belong to French. And the person that asked united states for help is chi Minn  so he tolled the southeast Asia something. In1954 they lost a battle to the Vietnamese it was a loss that made still their troops out of the Vietnam their country was supposed to unit in 1956 so however the united states did not want the  country to be a communists county so they helped Ngo become a president  in the south Vietnam president Richard Nixon decided to stop the war on july the South Vietnam was now a communists country.

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Today I will be writing the causes of the cold war. First, the Korean War. The second and last cause is the Space Race.

The first cause I am writing about is the Korean War. It was between North and South Korea. North Korea wanted all of Korea to have a communist type of government. That means that only one person controlled everything in the country. South wanted all of Korea to have a democratic type of government. That means that the citizens have power too. They were in an argument and couldn't agree, so they fought. The U.S. helped South Korea and the Soviet Union helped North Korea. They signed a treaty that said they could keep both of the type of governments. According to the text,''  Based on the treaty, both parts of Korea would remain independent from each other and a buffer zone was placed to prevent any other wars from happening.''

The second cause I am writing about is the Space Race. The Space Race is when the United States and the Soviet Union were trying to get the first person to do something in space. The Soviet Union beat us in the first person to orbit the Earth. However, we landed the first person on the moon. Based on what I read,'' Yuri Gargarin was the first man to orbit the Earth in the Russian space craft, VostokI.''

That concludes my essay on the causes of the Cold War. The Korean War. Then the Space Race.

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The cold War was not an actual war it was a competition against the soviet union and the U.S. the first part of it was supporting north and south Korea the south supported by the U.S. and the north supported by the soviet union A.K.A Russia that all was with the proxy wars then next came the arms race a war with atomic, nuclear, and HYDROGEN BOMBS and missiles coming out of the floor and making cities go BOOM after that the space race, the space race was to see who could get to orbit the earth in a full circle and who could get to the moon first then comes big ''Arguments''  the iron curtain blocked people from west berlin to get to east berlin to get freedom from communism and have a democracy annnnnnnd that's it for this 2 paragraph thing so byebye

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Do you know the book Dork diaries? I'm reading it so here is a quick summary of it and what it is about.
It all started when Nikki was in the shower and her sister wanted to go to the bathroom but she really wanted to get her baby doll. Then Nikki got a phone call that she thought was an excuse or just coming in the bathroom. But it was her crush on the phone inviting her to his birthday party. She Rushed out the bathroom. With soap suds all over her then she realized it was really him Nikki chaster through the house. An finally got the phone back from my sister.
The next day there was a sign up for an ice skating fundraiser for fuzzy friends and her friends want to her to join together as a group Nikkis Friends finally convinced her to come because at first she said no. Well then later Nikki heard McKinsey girl from school in the stall bathroom in the bathroom talking about that she was joining the fuzzy friends fundraiser on ice skating and Nikki didn't like McKenzie at all. Nikki was so close to backing out of the fundraiser but do you want to help fuzzy friends.
That is my summary on dork diaries I hope this gave you that a vantage of wanting to read this book.I think it's good so far it alot  about dramma.

That's all I read to this book gives me four points and it will get me halfway to My goal.

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Dear Ms. Ray

I am going to be writing about the book Reindeer.  By: Dee Phillips and is a informational text. After reading the book I will tell you some facts from the author.

First, Reindeer are also know as caribou. A caribou is any of several North American subspecies, ecotypes, populations, and herds of the species reindeer. As the author stated,'' Reindeer are also know as a caribou.''

Second, Did you know that reindeer lose their antlers after each year just like the author stated,'' A reindeer loses and grows a new pair of antlers after each year.'' Even though  they lose their antlers male and female lose their antlers at different times for instance the author stated,''  Male reindeer lose their antlers in winter. Female reindeer lose their antlers in the spring.''

Lastly, Something very cool about reindeer is that they spread their hooves an that keeps them above the snow as the author stated,'' They spread their hooves and act as snow shoes.''  I have never seen snow shoes before but I know that they look like tennis rackets on your feet.

In conclusion, Reindeers are not mythical creatures.

<3<3<3

Aubrey Y.

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Today I'm going to talk about the cold war lets begin. The cold war after world war two ended American and Soviet Union went in to the cold war they started to compete to each other to think there  soviet union the best this is how it started. The proxy wars where to countries that fought other countries and the two cities where south Korea and north Korea the United states supported south Korea and soviet union supported north Korea the north Korea state wanted a  person like Hitler to run they state. The south Korea wanted a person to run their state  and the wanted their right  people form north Korea looked liked the same as south Korea so if they got in to a war the people form north Korea could shoot the people form south Korea. The to states fought in Korea because the soviet union went for north Korea and the untied states went for south Korea and the war was between these to countries they did not resolve much because the two countries where divided. The leader of north Korea was  the person that lead north Korea was young-kun and he was the president  and the chief the president of south Korea and  south Korea did not have a person to run their countries like north they had one like Hitler.  The Soviet union put the Frist man throw space and the united states put the Frist man on the moon then we started to brag in their face and say ha we beat Yall  at this  and then they after the then a new person became president and somebody asked him to set miseals at them. And then the new president of the united states new there was going to be a war between them and the he said we got to meat the person Be for  they go to war on may 12,1949   they toerdown the wall and 277,000 flights came in. The space  was when you send people in to space and soviet union set the Frist person around the earth and his name was Alan Shepherd and I it started on February 20, 1962.

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Today I would like to share what I read this week. I read a book over the Cold War. The cold war mainly talks about this war against the Soviet union and the United states. it all started when the allied powers started to disbelieve the soviet union. In the text the author stated, "Even after the war, the Allied Powers distrusted the Soviet Union because of the leadership under Joseph Stalin and the spread of communism." In my assertion I think that we should not have been in any more wars and should enjoy the little bit of our time doing more parties for the ones who served in the war.

In my second paragraph I would like to talk about the Proxy War. The Proxy war is any type of war that was fought against other countries. In the text the author stated, "Proxy Wars were wars fought between other countries, but each side received support from one of the superpowers." In this booklet there are six different states that fought in the Proxy war and they are : United States vs Soviet Union , Korean War vs Vietnam war, Yom Kipper and Soviet Afghanistan. I think I would have pretend that I trusted the Soviet Union. Actually, I really do not know if I would pretended because I was not there.

In conclusion I have enjoyed lessons one and two. I doubt that I would want to go in another war back to back. I also wanted to maybe share my assertion with if I think there should be a war I think it was just unnecessary to have a war again.

Jordan,
Thanks for sharing with me this week. I agree with what you said about the United States, I know that they were trying to stop the spread of communism, but I don't think the w

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What is the Veotnam war?Today I will be writing about the Veotnam War. I willing be explain what it was. This proxy war was extremely tragic.Short story we failed to stop the spread of communism . Know if you read on you will find out what happened.

First of all Veitnam was part of France but after World War 2 it was owned by the Japenies. Veitnam wanted to be their own country. Northern Vietnam was communist but the southern part of Vietnam did not want to be communist.They spilt into two separate contries.The author states,"The Vietnam war was fought between the North's communist government and the South's government."

Next we entered the War.We didn't fight as much because the president of the U.S. would not allow us to fight. In the text the author stated,"The U.S. was limited and was not allowed to attack Northern Vietnam from 1965-1969."

Lastly we exited the war. That means that southern Veitnam lost the war. The author sted in the text,"President Richard Nixon decided to end the U.S encolvment in the war." It was very tragic.

In conclusion the Veotnam war was very tragic. I mean we lost and Vietnam was communist because we backed out of the war. This has been my writing peice on the War.

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I'm writing about DORK diaries Tales from a NOT-SO-Popular Party Girl. This book was by Rachel Renee Russell. The genre of this book is Realistic fiction. I'll write the shortest summary I can do.

There was a Halloween dance coming up, and Nikki had no one to go to the dance with. Nikki's BFF's, Chloe and Zoey, said they should say there dates were the band members and say they would be busy all night, so they could all hang out together. Nikki disagreed and said her idea, which was dress up like bags of trash join the clean up crew for the party and have cleaning supplies as dancing partners.
her BFF's said it was lame.

A few days later, Nikki's mom told Nikki to take her little sister, Brianna, to her recital. Nikki knew Brianna didn't want to go to her recital, because she hated ballet. then Nikki said her mom made her take ballet to when she was Brianna's age. Nikki says she also hated ballet. After Brianna's recital, a woman walked up to Nikki and asked if she could paint the ballet students faces for the Halloween party she was making for them. She also said her niece said that Nikki was the best artist in her school. Then the woman gave Nikki $150. Then nikki agreed to paint the ballet student at the ballet students Halloween party.

A few days later Mackenzie (A.K.A Nikki's enemy), messed up everything for the Halloween dance, just because  Brandon wouldn't go to the  dance with her. The people that were left to set up the Halloween dance including Nikki, were going to have a meeting to cancel the dance. Then her crush, Brandon asked her to go to the dance with him if there is one. At the meeting, the people decided to make the best Halloween dance ever!

On Halloween, nikki realized she had to wear a rat costume at the ballet student's Halloween party, paint ballet students faces, go hang out with her friends as bags of trash, and spend the dance with Brandon in a Juliet costume, all at the same time on this day.
Everything truly worked for her until the kids that were the ballet students followed her to the Halloween dance, and Mackenzie blew her cover. Nikki ran out of there crying, but Brandon comfort her and the party wasn't over, so  Brandon, Chloe, Zoey, and Nikki all hung out together for the rest of the Halloween dance.

In conclusion, Nikki had to do a lot of task on Halloween, and couldn't do them all. Then got caught and everything went wrong, but in the end everything worked out.

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Today I am writing about the Vietnam War. The Vietnam War was a proxy war. That means that the United States and the Soviet Union helped one side of a battle. It was from November 1, 1955 to April 30, 1975.

Vietnam is located in Asia. North Vietnam was wanting a communist government and South Vietnam had a different type of government. According to the author,'' The Vietnam war was fought between the North's  communist  government and the South's government.''

This communist man named Ho Chi Minh and his rebels fought the French. Ho wanted the U.S. to help out, but he was a communist man and we don't support the communist governments. This is when we joined the war. According to the author,''  A revolutionist and communist Ho Chi Minh and his rebels began to fight the French. Ho wanted the United States to help, but the United States didn't want to help Ho spread communism in Southeast Asia. This is when the United States wanted to interfere, and in 1950 they sent aid to the French in Vietnam.''

President Nixon ended  the United States's  involvement in the war. The United States had failed from stopping Vietnam from having a communism government. According to the author,'' President Richard Nixon decided to end the U.S. involvement in the war. The U.S. has lost the war and failed in stopping the spread of communism.''

That concludes my essay about the Vietnam War. The U.S,. lost the war. They also failed to stop communism in South Vietnam.
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hope you in joy

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The Vietnam War was a war caused by democracy and communism there was once a problem that North Vietnam and South Vietnam had it was their democracy North Vietnam had a communism government and South Vietnam had a Democracy the north wanted to change the government in the south to communism and the south wanted to change the government in the north to a democracy but the more fighting that Vietnam had the more wars that Vietnam had so Vietnam had a war that was like a proxy war south Vietnam was supported by the united states and north Vietnam was supported by the soviet union A.K.A. USSR A.K.A Russia A.K.Aception, so this is the end of the ten paragraphs but there's a little bonus the Vietnam war was also called THE SECOND INDOCHINA WAR it was also known as a proxy war and a COLD WAR-ERA

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Ralph was shook into the vines on the side of the building. How was Ralph going to get back in luckily Keith was at a picnic,but his parents couldn't see him. Ralph found a ambulance truck and rode in it back inside.

Keith told Ralph he'd be leaving in a few days ,so Ralph told Keith to bring five peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.Keith said okay and agreed so he got them for him and Keith was on his way to camp. Ralph told them this needs to last a couple of months but they were so greedy that they ate it all in one week ,so Ralph had a decision to make go risk his life to get food or starve..........To Be Continued JUST KIDDING HE DIDN'T GO GET THE FOOD BECAUSE SOMEONE DROPPED A PB&J ON THE FLOOR.

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Hi I am going to inform you  about the Vietnam War.
First, Vietnam is located in Southeast Asia. And its borders China to the North and Cambodia to the west, Laos to the east.
Second, just like the Korean War the Vietnam was a proxy war that fought to top spread the communism. The Vietnam War was fought between the North's communist government and the South government. The North Vietnam was supported by the Republic of China and the S.U.
Third, Before WW2, the Vietnam was a colony that belonged to France. During WW2, Japan took control of Vietnam. They wanted to be a free country but the Allied Powers agreed that it would still belong to the French.
Fourth, Ngo Dinh Diem get elected in the South it was at this moment that the United States would become involved and entered the Vietnam War.
Last, President Lyndon Johnson wanted to help build up the Southern Vietnamese troops  in order for them to be strong enough  rather than the U.S winning the war for them. The U.S troops  were limited  and not allowed to attack Northern Vietnam from 19865 till 1969 that is was four years too.
In conclusion, That the U.S had lost the Vietnam war and 58,220 United States soldiers died.

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The long haul  by: Jeff Kinney
Today I will be Typing About The long haul by Jeff Kinney .I will by typing about the main event's in the book so, i hope you will enjoy my typing piece.

First of all in the book Greg and his family go on a trip. there wasn't enough room for all the stuff to fit in the car so, they brought there boat and, put some of there stuff in the boat.They went to a Motel and the next day Greg could not watch TV because his brother Manny was asleep.By then he was still sleepy so, he sleep in the closet. the reason he did not sleep on the floor is because his other brother Rodrick was on the couch cushions So, you could say he was one step ahead.

Second of all the Beardo's. When Greg was in the closet trying to sleep he heard a noise and i was coming from out side his door.
it was 3 kids ,so he confronted them and, while he was doing that Mr. Berado came out the door. Greg ran then he got in his room but Mr. Beardo didn't see which room he went in to and ended up knocked on the wrong door. that means Greg got away.

Third of all The water park,And Manny. When Greg and his family went to the water park they got some good chair's.Although Greg got away with it The Beardo's took their chair's when they left for 5 minute's . Greg family saw then they left and tried to get their stuff but they lost the key
So, they accused the beardo's of theft. They later found them on the road but, then they took a left turn but, there was a purple van behind them.they thought it was the beardo's but it was 2 Spanish men. they had a flat tire at the time and needed a ride but they couldn't talk in Spanish. Instead they tried to show them but didn't understand. Then Manny suprised everyone by speaking in perfect Spanish. Next thing they knew they were offering them a ride. They thought Manny pulled through for them but he took them to the petting zoo to get a pig.
in the end Greg found the key to the locker THE END

After that I hope you enjoyed my typing piece about the water park,Manny,The beardo's,and the trip. Have a good night every body!

My YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC-_DnexjO06MFHZkW8ORPg
My other YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAc5aVx132xx7D5xH8TKv6g

PLZ Sub!!!

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Today I'm summarizing the goal of Martin Lurther King jr speech. The name of the speech "I Have a Dream".

The "I Have a Dream" speech goal was for all people to be treated as equals. No matter the race. For example African-Americans, they were treated unfairly or as second class citizens during that time.

Martin Lurther King jr won a nobel prize because of this speech.
he tried best to end segregation and this speech really help this happen.

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This month is black history month and Martin Lurther King is apart of black histor month. Today I'm going to summarize a speech made by Martin Luther king Jr. The name of the speech was "I Have a Dream".  --------------------------------------------------------------------The goal of the speech was to say he wanted every race to be equal. For there would be no more segregation to separate the races.                                                             --------------------------------------------------------------------His speech quote said,"I have a dream that my four Children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."

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Ralph was shook in the vines. Ralph saw a ambulance truck ,and drove it inside the tires got stuck in the crack. On the elevator Ralph got loose from the crack but how was he going to touch the elevator button. Luckily Matt was at the counter and he pressed the button for Ralph.

He got back and gave the aspirin to Keith was still mad that was my favorite motorcycle. I know said Ralph how can I make up. Can you try and get my motorcycle back . Ralph was stunned by the news Ralph said no news is good news........ Is Ralph Going To Get The Motorcycle????????????? TO BE CONTINUED........

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I have a dream. That was by Martin Luther king. This was one of the biggest speeches he had ever made. Today you will be reading how it made an impact on the Civil Rights movement.

One of the biggest impacts is the way it impacted was the March on Washington. The author stated, "Anyone who knows anything about the 1963 March on Washington for jobs and freedom knows the setting in the shadow of the Lincon monument, for the Rev. Martin Luther king Jr. " That was one of the big things that made a difference.

Also one of the impacts is the inspiration it have to those people living in segregation. In the text the author states,"That was 50 years ago and 250,000 people gathered on the National Mall." That was no it inspired them. If that many people show up it is going to make a difference.

In that one speech it inspired thousands of people. It also inspired the March on Washington. I have now told you some of the ways that the speech made an impact.

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Today we will be talking about Thur good Marshall. Thur good Marshall      was born in July 2, 1908 Thur good Marshall and he lived in Mary land and he studied law Howard  university. And Thur good Marshall was not only the first Black American to be on the Supreme court some people didn't no that his mother was a slave. And he was fighting for black people rights and and black people did not no have the new things like withe people. Did like schools that withe people had stage and gym and another stage and a lunch room. And the black people had 1 rooms and that was a stage room and a gym room and a lunch room and Thur good  Marshall  was the lawyer of the brown and board of Education and he was the leader of the NAACP and some times the President would pick there friends  but he didn't he picked Thur good Marshall he said i wont him to be on the supreme court and he was and i forgot his mother did not get to go to school and they spelled his name like thourgh and he said that though it was to long then he change it  to Thur good Marshall and he john F. Kennedy  was lee harvey oswald
this is my peice.

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The Mask by: Aubrey Y.

Once upon a time there was a girl named Faith Jones. She was 17 years old almost 18. She had a neighbor named Jake Walker he already turned 18. She has had a crush on him since they were in Carter Wood Elementary. They have been best friends every since but she felt stronger but thought he would never like her because her family HATES Jake they say he is a bad kid. I don't know why they think that he is really sweet and smart and funny they just judge him by what he looks like. He has dirty blonde hair with blue and green eyes. he always wheres a black hoodie with pink words that say Extreme Sports. My family would never let him be with me. Until the unspeakable happened it all started when my friend Nicole Brook through a Masquerade Costume party. We decided not to tell each other what we were wherein or what we are going as. I went as Cinderella with a white and blue dress and a silver,blue, and white mask. On the night of the party i met some one he went as Prince Charming with a gold,black,white,and brown costume with a white and gold mask. I felt a connection i have never felt with Jake it was true true true love as we danced we went out side to grab some chocolate to eat it we had to take of our masks he went first as he lifted up his mask a million things were going through my head. As he lifted it i was in shock it was Jake's twin brother Jack. I could barley talk as i stated to he interrupted "So are you going to take yours off." He said in a soothing voice. "Uh...y..yah." i said hesitant I started to lift my mask slowly as i did I saw Jake. I couldn't let him see me with his brother so i turned away and ran towards him as i did my mask fell off. "Wait i don't even now your name.'' He yelled. As he knelled down to grab my mask. ''Jake!'' i yelled surprisingly. ''Huh.... oh Faith hey where is your mask?'' He asked ''It is right here silly wait my mask fell off.'' I said panicking "OH NO OH NO what if he come over here to see his brother he will know!" i whispered under my breathe "What?" he asked puzzled "Huh... oh nothing" i said trying to play it off"alright then you ready to go i will drive you home it is 11:50?'' he suggested. " Oh it is 11:50 yah lets go" I said as i held his hand

TO BE CONTINUED.....................

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Dear Ms.ray,
I am going to be writing about why Martin Luther King Jr's words really do make a difference in his speech to end segregation. The first reason how words make a difference is that he got shot because of what he said. The second reason is that he said he wanted people to be judged by how there character is not by the color of there skin.
First, the first reason that words make a difference is that Martin Luther King Jr. got shot because of what he said and what he meant. That meant the person who killed him must hate him and love segregation. In a Power point I found online the author said,"Dr. King was shot in 1968 as he stood on a motel balcony in Memphis, Tennessee."
Lastly, the last reason is that he said he wanted to tell people that he wanted people to be judged by the character of people not the color of there skin. I think the thing that started this hole mess was crazy. I mean why would they do that? In the Power point I read the author said,''My children will not be judged by the color of their skin."
In conclusion, words can make a difference because it gives you something to think about. His words made me think that a person can change how they act but they can not change the color of there skin.

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This is about story about a girl named Ruby who copeies a girl name Angela . Read the book to see what happens next...

Yen, this is NOT what you are to do. This is called plagiarism. I want a hand written summary from you over two paragraphs by you.
-Ms. Ray-

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go to the link it looks beter

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Yes, words make a difference.My reason are that he had a dream  wanted his children to live in a nation where they are not judge by it skin color and we are not satisfied until we are free difference. He was a important part of the Civil Rights moment. So, do you think Martin Luther King made a difference?

To begin with is that he wanted his kids to live in a world where everywhere you was treated equal. He also wanted little white boys and little white girls to join together with little black boys and black girls as brothers and sisters. MLK wanteds all men to be treated equal. Martin Luther King Jr. wanted no rasist or segergation. So, do you know any of Martin Luther King Jr. dreams ?

My final reason is that he is not satisfied until Afican Americans are free. We are not satisfied until Mississippi can vote. MLK is not satisfied until our children are not ripped from there dignity because of signs that say '' For Whites Only''. MLK said when will we ever be satisfied . So, are we satisfied now ?

In conclusion, I have wrote to you about MLK dream for America and are we satisfied yet. The main idea is that '' I Have A Dream''  speech. So Martin Luither King Jr. words do make a difference. Do they make a difference to you ?

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Dory and the Real True Friend by: Abby Hanlon
Today I am going to inform you about a book called Dory And The Real True Friend.
First,  Dory is scared to go to school on her first day and she wonders will she make any new friends. Because last year she  bought Mary to her school and then one day Mary said she needed  to go to the bathroom but mainly she like playing with the soap and then she asked the teacher can she go to the bathroom and the teacher said ''NO'' but that time she really had to use the bathroom and then she wet her pants and that time the teacher didn't have to go to the bathroom cause she knew that she was going to play with soap but she really had to go to the bathroom.
Then, Dory went to school and she was lonely at first but then on the carpet and tried to get close to this girl name ROSABELLE  and the reason why I said that cause she thought she could dress better than her but then she wasn't she wanted to be her Best Friend and after a few hours later they went out to recess and then Dory asked her ''How did you get your dress so poufy''? Rosabelle says I use six different shirts. And then after that they went in, it was time  to go and then the day was over and  Dory mother came and she yelled ''Bye best friend'''. Then Rosabelle smiled but Dory mother said '' You already have a best friend and school just started. '' Yes I do''.

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TOPIC:
Use evidence from the Civil Rights book 3 this week to compare and contrast the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the Voting Rights Act of 1965  or Pretend you were in a public school when they were integrated, write a narrative to tell what it was like during the Civil Rights Movement.

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yen nguyen

Yen, this is NOT what you are to do. This is called plagiarism. I want a hand written summary from you over two paragraphs by you.
-Ms. Ray-

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HI Mrs.Ray I did my homework on word

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Dr. Martin Luther King-Posted by Ms. Ray 

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Dr. Martin Luther King-Posted by Ms. Ray 

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"I Have a Dream Speech" by Dr. Martin Luther King spoken at the March on Washington for better pay, better jobs, equality, and freedom.

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Martin Luther King, Jr. I Have A Dream Speech

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The Story of Martin Luther King-Kid President

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The Story of Martin Luther King-Kid President

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Check this out! So inspiring!
Posted by Ms. Ray

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The Story of Martin Luther King Jr. by Kid President

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my reading homework

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June 12,1954
Hi, I am Penny Johns my mom just enrolled me at a new school, since the schools are no longer segregated. Now I will be going to Sunny Vile elementary. My mom says to be careful I think I will be just fine.

June 20,1954

Today is my first day I am ready a little scared but ready. I have meet a girl like me. She doesn't talk much but I understand new school with white people so I get it. I hang with her though she is cool we talk in the bathroom since it is only African Americans.

June 25, 1954

I just want to leave this school people always call me darkie or colored. It makes me feel like i don't belong here. Everyone always splashes me with water and pushes me to the ground and remark "This is where you belong." I just watch and I see people not coming back I don't know why. That is not all. Even though we are together I feel like we are apart. The white students make us drink from a different water fountain and go to a different bathroom from them. I tell my mom but she just answers "It is for an education just show them who you are." So I will I am going to listen and show them who the real Penny Johns is.

June 30,1954

This was a bad day I wanted to show every one that I was not going to stand for other students to be putting segregation in a nonsegregated school so I showed them well sort of. It all happened like this a little white girl named Tiffany White with frizzy blonde hair an green eyes and a sassy and rich girl voice walked over and said " Um, what are you doing here in the white hall blackness like you go in the colored hall down stairs." Wow! That was a first blackness man that was rude. So I declared "Well my next class is down the hall ,and I already have my books from my locker down stairs. Besides if I do hang out down in my hall I will be late for class. So NO I am staying here." It didn't go very well she slapped me then I pushed her and it ended up with me in the principles office. What happened was she saw a teacher coming and she layed on the ground,started to scream, and fake cry. So the teacher thought I bet her up didn't even care that I was bleeding and sent me to the principles office.

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July 20, 1954

I think I had a pretty well day today. Lets just say two words "new and friend." It all happened like this. A girl named Michelle Black a white girl came down to our hall. I was getting stuff out of my locker and she came over to talk to me(surprising i know!). She had a soft ,but sweet voice as she asked, " Could I hang out with you um... Johns?" Um.. it's Penny and why would you want to hang out with me? She looked embarrassed as she whispered," Well my ex-friends were bulling me and they um.. banned me from hanging out with them. Well some people were saying that you are super nice and fun. So I wanted to know if I could hang out with you?" I looked at her puzzled as i thought about it. So I asked "Did Tiffany White Make fun of your last name Michelle?'' She held her head down. Her actions told a million words. "Sure you can hang out with me Michelle!" She smiled and it lite up the whole room. I called over Ruth he came running. "What! What! Is this girl trying to hurt you!" He yelled. No she is going to hang out with us today is that OK. He look suspicious as he asked "Why would she want to hang out with us?"  I whispered, '' Tiffany was making fun of her last name. It's Black and Tiffany's is White you can see why." He understood, Yah you can hang out with us."

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Directions:
Write 5 or more paragraphs in your homework journal about one of the topics from the social studies passages.

TOPICS TO WRITE ABOUT:

Use evidence from the passages this week to write an informative-constructive writing piece to explain the event that happened on 9/11/2001

Pretend you were a fire fighter during the event on 9/11/2001, write a narrative using imagery to tell what it was like on that day).

Write a comparing and contrasting constructive response about President George W. Bush and Barack Obama.

Respond to this opinion prompt and answer the question below: Do you agree with the United States being involved in the Persian Gulf War/Operation Desert Storm?

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Based on a true story of my Grandmother, during the Civil Rights Act.

The high schools and colleges were integrated, though not any middle schools or elementray schools had a single black in the schools.  When I was in the high school band and traveled to Alabama, we weren't aloud to perform. Rocks and bricks were thrown at our bus because we were black coming from black schools.

It was my freshman year of college and I decided to go to Tift College in 1968. Tift College was a all white female school. I wanted to learn more about whites.

While I was there, only two of the students were African Americans besides me. There was also a Korean girl. The Korean girl fited in better than we did because she was almost as light as a white.

People liked touching my hair because it had a different texture to it than their hair was. Some of them looked at me like I was crazy. Some of them invited me to church but,  the pastor would not allow me to enter the church in fear of loosing his members because I was of a different color.  Some of the students told me that I was different from what their parents told them, and if I went to their home town I would be stoned.

I was an A and B honor role student until I  kept getting C's in chemistry. I was in the drama club at the college. I auditioned for a part and was selected to play  as a boy in a drama called "The Florist Shop". People said the drama was great and I was fantastic.

At the end of the year I decided to transfer because I was failing Chemistry and I didn't want to flunk out. I was still one of the first African-Americans to attend Tift college.  All that I learned from the Whites was that we were all still the same. Even with our different colored skin we were still  people and had a lot in common.

Aubrey,
This is such a fantastic piece of writing! I LOVE every word of it. You did a great job interviewing your grandmother and retelling the story of hers through her perspective. I am in just in awe of your writing piece this week! Way to go!
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Hi, I am Daisy and I am African American. Yesterday the supreme court just said that African Americans can go to any public school. Well, I am going to school today in Rose elementary. So you are gong to find out how it goes with me.

So, I just got into the school. I tried to talk to a white girl but she just completely iced me out. I just tried to go to the bathroom and just got charged to use it by two eighth graders. I had to pay to go to the bathroom but right after me came this white sixth grader and she was not charged.

I just met my teacher. Her name is ms.Florez. She is white and very nice to me. I introduced myself to the class and they all moved away from me when I sat down. I heard one of the girls say," look at her. SHe is so strange looking. With all of that braided black hair."

After that class, I met Mr. Smith. He was horrible to me. While all the other kids did math,I was in the corner wearing the dunce cap writing an essay on segregation and why its right. I felt like and dunce.

My last class was horrible. It was like entering the worst snow storm ever. Nobody looked at me, talk to me, or even sat beside me. This boy said,"She is so ugly. Why did they even let her in the school?" The boy beside him agreed and said," She just needs to go back to her old shack." It made me  almost cry. I went to the bathroom and bawled my eyes out. Then I heard foot steps and a few little sniffles. When I stepped out and saw a girl named Scarlet. She was just like me. She had dark skin and long black hair. We started talking and she had a similar experience with Mr. Smith. It turns out she just moved on my road. When I went back to class I had to do a math problem on the board. I made a mistake The teacher through his lunch left over lunch at me.

I am finally home. "Mom two of the teachers were horrible to me. This boy said that I was ugly and that I didn't belong there",I said. " Well if you let them make you  upset you will be sad and depressed. Don't let them make you upset." When my dad came home from work he hugged me and told me," You are not ugly . You are just as good as them and don't ever let anybody tell you different."

Kendyl,
Thanks for sharing with me this week! I enjoyed reading your journal entry for this week.
Thank you for rewriting the ending of your story.  It didn’t feel complete until you changed it. You just cut it off. I love the ending now because you are teaching the reader a lesson through Daisy’s experience. The Milestone reader’s love for a narrative to show morals, lessons, or themes in the writing.
However, there is something I need you to check over and that is your commas when you are writing complex sentences starting with a subordinating conjunctions and compound sentences with a simple sentence + ,/Coordinating Conjunctions (FANBOYS) + simple sentence. There were several people this week that had issues with these small errors. Remember you are expected to use a variety of sentences, but they must be used correctly! In your writing next week make sure to address these issues.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Kenah,
Thanks for sharing with me this week! I enjoyed reading your writing this week.
Girl, please tell me I am not seeing "u" for the word "you". What is up with that? We are NOT texting!!! Do you remember what I said the week before break? We do not use text lingo when writing academic writing or on the MILESTONES.
You did a good job giving me a reason why you agreed with Rosa Parks. You had a great reason: she was standing up for herself and what was right. However, that second paragraph is one LONG sentence. It should be broken up in to more than one sentence. Go back and read that paragraph and fix it. You did the same thing with the conclusion paragraph. Remember the conclusion has to be 3-5 sentences.
Did you have a problem with indenting? Let me know, I want to help you. I opened it and the 2nd and 3rd paragraph was indented, but not the first. Did you just forget to indent on the introduction or did you have a problem with it? Just let me know either way.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Hi, my name is April and I am not like others I am African American with long hair ,and I am going to a public integrated school. I am kind of petrified to see what everyone thinks of me what if I don't fit in ...I guess I will have to see tomorrow.

Today was the first day of school. It was weird the teacher never called on me and never gave me anything. Even when I walked in the room everyone was whispering mean things about me. At lunch the African America kids went to the table in the corner and the white kids ate in the middle ,but I  really didn't have a problem with that .  when I went to my last class of the day I met some friends  angel and may. they were just like me the had a bad day to ,but we knew it would get better.

When I got home I had a long conversation with my mom about school. Also I had a lot of homework to do, but surprisingly it wasnt hard.  I will just have to see what will happen tomorrow.

(You need a comma after the word today, lunch, and also. You also didn't capitalize the last 2 sentences of your 2nd paragraph.)

Alannah,
Thanks for sharing with me this week! I enjoyed reading your writing this week.
The biggest thing about the piece are the small errors. However, these small errors can build to become big ones. I noted the comma errors I saw that need changing and the capitalization at the beginning of 2 sentences. But that first sentence is about to make me stroke out, lol! Are you trying to list items in a series? If not then you need to break those sentences up or combine them by making them compound sentences or complex sentences. By the time we take the Milestones you will have to be a master at those standards of being able to correctly write a compound sentence, complex sentence, items in a series with commas, and vary up the sentence structures in your paragraphs. Make sure to start working on this in the next writing pieces to come.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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I am so happy that the supreme stated it was   unconstitutional    for most school be based of your gender. I was at a speech today at the Lincoln Memorial giving a speech there was thousands of people there. I   want this segregation  to end.

I stated my opinion at the speech I Have A Dream Speech was my best speech ever. I am going to keep fighting for segregation to end in the United States. I am about to take my wife out to eat suddenly I hear a gun shoot. Martin Luther King Jr. died April 4  1968. MLK Died at the age of 39. He was killed by James Earl Ray.

Charon,
Thanks for sharing with me this week!
Charon, we have got to enhance this writing. In order for you to get a 3 or 4 on the Milestones, you got to step this up. I know you can do it, because I have seen it in your writing before. From here on out you need to treat every writing piece like it is the Milestones. If you do, it will help you get a 3 or 4 on the Milestones. Practice makes perfect!!! This piece was a good piece, but good is an antonym to the word great. I want your writing pieces to be great!!
Just for future reference, the title of a speech is in quotes ("I Have a Dream Speech") when you use it in writings like this.
Because you change voices in your writing at the end, which I LOVE how you did that, you need to indent the 4th-6th sentence to start a new paragraph to let the reader of your writing know that you changed the writing from first person to third person. Do you understand what I am saying by that?
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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today I'm going to talk about john f. Kennedy.  He was the president of the united states and he was going to imgrat everything  and he was the president form 1961 to 1963. I no that dose not sound like a long time he was killed by lee Harvey Oswald and then he was killed by jack Ruby and somebody hatted john F. Kennedy Lyndon B. Johnson hatted  him but it sound a little fishy I think  he paid lee Harvey Oswald. But after john F. Kennedy was killed and  Lyndon B. Johnson became president and he had to stick with the deal. And john f. Kennedy put Thur good Marshall even that Thur good Marshall was African American and he was not only  the first black African American. He fought for African American right and he was the lawyer for the brown and board of something and he won and  then they all came together like Martin Luther King said and that's the point where the key to all of this and Martin hade hope and dreams that this will   and it did now Martin look down on us and see how we get along and I'm glad that happened because we would still have have rascim but there is some    are still going on  Ms. Ray told me that and that's all for today.

Antwan,
Dude, where is that punctuation and capitalization at? I want you to go back and add it in for me, before I read the rest of this. Do it as soon as possible!
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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Jacob,
Thanks for sharing this week with me!
You have an okay writing piece for this narrative writing this week. But the simple errors are so distracting. My biggest thing I need you to fix in this piece is to capitalize the word "i". All throughout your writing it isn't capitalized. The rule for this is, if "i" stands alone you have to capitalize it in writing!  (i'm= I am, so it has to be capitalized I'm.)
Remember if a number is 10-0 you have to write out the number word. If it is 11 to infinity, then you can just put the numeral. Just a reminder about that.
I do LOVE how you used the word serene to mean calm in your writing this week and that you were using some figurative language-simile. However, the word serene is out of place with the last sentence when you are trying to describe the boy's glasses. Remember what I said to Aubrey Young and Khalil about those things.
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

Jan 1/1954

There is only 1 word to sum this day up -=Horrible=-  My teacher yelled at me.Also i had to move schools. I know nobody now.I wonder what might happen to me at the new school?

Jan 2/1954

School is so much worse I wish I stayed. This school is serene and all ,but i was bullied by this guy named Bill Hinson.When he hit it stung like a wasp's sting.It stung for about 1hour and 12 minutes ,but I was fine after that. Also he knocked my tray over at lunch. I dont think that was very inviting ,for my first day anyway.

Jan 3/1954

Today i had about 9 white people surround me at recess on the brown bench. They started to hit me i dodged the first 3 hits but they just kept on coming. they stopped when my teacher saw them. i think that's just cause there racist or at least i hope. i Don't want them to think i'm a bad student. a Black African American helped me up. he had Black hair as dark as space. and some serene glasses the color of a tiger's skin.

My -=+YouTube+=-
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAc5aVx132xx7D5xH8TKv6g WIP
My Other -=+YouTube+=-
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC-_DnexjO06MFHZkW8ORPg

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July 30, 1954

Today was a day I will never forget. I will not be the only one who will never for get it. The whole school will especially Patrick McClellan.  Patrick was running unopposed as the school president so he will automatically win if no one runs against him. So I thought that was unfair. So I automatically told Ruth and our new friend Michelle. You will never believe what they said. "You should totally run against him I would vote for you and all the African Americans(I love how she does not call us blackies, blackness, colored, black,brown, or negro) would too." I totally agree with Michelle you need to run you would be so good." You really think so! "I think you would have all the African Americans votes" "I agree with Ruth you would." So I did I ran against him only because  there are an equal amount of whites as there are African Americans in the school so this was fair. When the votes came in I WON I got 700 out of 1,000 votes. Patrick only got 300 votes out of 1,000.I am so thrilled! I could just scream.

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June 16, 1954

About a week ago the Supreme Court aforementioned that an African American like me can go to any school I want. So, I am attending to Vineville Academy. My first day is tomorrow. I can't wait.

June 17, 1954

Today was my first day of fifth grade and it was abhorrent. I got pushed around all day by an agglomeration of white people. I had to pay to get water and I didn't import any money to school. Luckily, it was unrecompensed to get lunch. African Americans had to masticate this juice with a bunch of vegetables in it. They said it was called soup. The white people got to masticate this delicious looking thing with cheese and red circles on it. Thats called pizza.

June 21, 1954

My whole week was like what I written on Monday, abhorrent. We ate soup all week. They these things called hot dogs, noodles, and this one annoying kid named Ramen claims he is gonna make a brand of noodles named after him. I doubt it though. I am going to paint a picture of what happened before this whole intergrated thing happened and when people started showing signs in the air.

Khalil,
I love that you applied what we were learning in class to your writing! That makes my heart, so happy because I know you are listening to what I am saying to make your writing better. However, do you remember me explaining to you before the break about your word choice? You have to be careful because you have to make sure that you understand the meaning of the word and that you are using it correctly in your writing.
Other than that, I enjoyed reading your writing this week and loved how you used the word abhorrent!!! :) Thanks for sharing this week!
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

The .''Painting'' (It's not an actual painting)

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Aubrey,
I love that you applied what we were learning in class to your writing! That makes my heart, so happy because I know you are listening to what I am saying to make your writing better by using figurative language. However, do you remember me explaining to you before the break about the way you worded that character's eyes? Remember I told you it made me hungry. You have to be careful because you have to make sure that you word the simile correctly so that what you are meaning to say is not misconstrued or confused by your reader, like I did.
Other than that, I enjoyed reading your writing this week and loved how you used figurative language in your writing :) Thanks for sharing this week!
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

July 10,1954

Hey I am back and today was the best day ever, people might say. I was on the floor getting yelled at by Patrick McClellan he was saying that I was staring at him and made it a big deal, and started beating me on the ground. I'm not saying I wasn't staring at him. It just wasn't at him. It was at his best friend Ruth Sam he is an African American with Fluffy, soft, and dark as night black hair and his eyes were as brown as chocolate chips. He was so nice but his friend wasn't obviously.Well as he was pummeling me on the ground a teacher came and saw him doing it. He tried to blame me but the teacher wasn't that dumb and did not believe him. So he had to go to the principles office and his friend Ruth came over with a towel and hot tea we talked for a while, and became friends.It turns out we have a lot in common.

July 15,1954

My friend that i met my first day here moved away i only have Ruth now.All the kids say she moved because of me.Did she? I don't know if she did or not. It is pretty unexpected for her to leave in the middle of the school year.

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Keniyah,
Thanks for sharing with me this week! I enjoyed reading your writing this week.
The biggest thing about the piece are the small errors. However, these small errors can build to become big ones. But that first sentence (2nd-4th paragraph) is about to make me stroke out, lol! (I said the same thing to Alannah, check her comments below!)  Are you trying to list items in a series? If not then you need to break those sentences up or combine them by making them compound sentences or complex sentences. By the time we take the Milestones you will have to be a master at those standards of being able to correctly write a compound sentence, complex sentence, items in a series with commas, and vary up the sentence structures in your paragraphs. Make sure to start working on this in the next writing pieces to come.
Also, I am confused why you, Khalil, and so many others when you all wrote about eating lunch at the integrated school, you all said that the white students (NOT kids because that is a dead word!) had better food than the African American students. This can't be because under Brown vs. BOE everything in the public schools were equal. During this time and up until the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the Voting Rights Act of 1965, the public schools were the only places where students were treated the same. (We will talk about this more this week. There were many people that did this.)
Sincerely,
Ms. Ray

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PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA

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President George W. Bush Jr.

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George W. Bush Differentiated Reading Passages

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The United States in the 20th and 21st Century

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The United States in 20th and 21st Century

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Persian Gulf War or Operation Desert Storm

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Persian Gulf War _ Operation Desert Storm Differentiated Passages

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September 11, 2001