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Note to Self
"how naïve are we
to conceive thoughts
and beliefs
that a world which gives
while we only receive
owes more
to our wants and needs
oh, how I pity us."
It shows personification by saying the world gives, the world can't physically gives things to us but it shows that we as humans take away what the world has.

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Thomas Jefferson and the Tripoli Pirates

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Thomas Jefferson and the Tripoli Pirates

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"The nations of the Barbary Coast had preyed upon foreign ships for centuries, attacking ships in international waters both in the Mediterranean and along the northwest coast of Africa and the Iberian peninsula."
This shows imagery in mentioning some locations of the attacks, which gives a good idea of the area in which the pirates operated.

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"It was a good thing Jay Swanson was such a good player, Danny thought. Otherwise, there would be no reason for him to exist."
The author shows great first person point of view throughout the story. The way he shows the main characters thoughts inside his head is amazing.

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"She walked around with a nimbostratus over her head."

Strong word choice  relating to  something that could never happen in the story and that's super cool. -Denaiya Pendleton

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My heart stops, and I can't believe what I see. A face comes back into view on the port in front of me. It is not Xander.

This gives you a cliff hanger because this is how the book starts basically.

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Only this time the bodies of a dozen boys hung limp and bloody from the ceiling, suspended upside down, ancient ropes tight around pale ankles. They were all dead. And they were all screaming.
... ... ...
Once again, I LOVE the graphic stuff! It's SO creepy, which is perfectly fitting, considering that it's in the main character's nightmare. The last sentence is kind of abrupt, which just adds to the jarring effect that dead-and-screaming corpses should have.

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"we came to the middle of the bridge. on either side of us the cars hissed past; red on the left and white on the right, the lanes encased by thin metal trussing that stretched out from the walkway."
This shows imagery by describing what it looks like to help the reader see what the writer was making the character to see.

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Not to Self
" today my heart was ripped in two one half for me, one half for you take a half and keep it near
I have mine and will always be here
crossing paths before the end
once a lover, forever a friend"
The author is using metaphors to express what he was feeling like even if its not physical possible.

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Toyko Heist
the sketches shows a dragon, clouds and flowers.
helps me to picture and drawling

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"its so hard to talk when you want to kill yourself"
this shows you a little bit about how the character feels and shows characterization

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Dead End
"In the morning, Samantha made breakfast for the family. Katelyn sat at the table using crayons to draw a deer running across the road. By the time Samantha had finished the French Toast and the scrambled eggs, Gina still hadn't emerged from her room."
The author again uses imagery to describe the scene, and he also does this to start most paragraphs.

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Thomas Jefferson and the Tripoli Pirates

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Thomas Jefferson and the Tripoli Pirates

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"America had not yet elected Its first president, but it already had its first enemy."
This is an example of certain word choice, in which the author is showing that the US is still small and leaderless, but still in danger.

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"once upon a time, she would've made it fun." this is interesting to me because she is reflecting back to how things used to be.

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Butter "I couldn't believe this had only been my life for a few days." This shows how the character thinks of time and characterizes him.

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Kick
"Mr. Johnson, I presume," Judge Kelly said, his glasses lowering to his nose.

The advantages of this technique is that the vivid verbs helps describe precisely what a character is doing.

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The Killing Woods
"But this girl isn't the same," she told firmly. "Not the one you killed." "The same!" Dad wailed. "Same."
This example shows good punctuation and good dialogue between the characters which adds to the story and makes people want to continue reading it.

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There were still water birds taking their fastidious little steps in the salt water, where mossy trees dipped down as if to drink.

Simile and Imagery

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I distinguish that day that football and track have one major difference... team.

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"they don't come out smooth and in conjunction with your brain the way normal peoples words do; they come out in chunks as if from a crushed ice dispenser; you stumble on them as they gather behind your lower lip."
he uses metaphors to explain how talking feels for him

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I started with the wheezers and their gas masks, stitched into faces that looked so old, so decayed, that they could have belonged to corpses--black eyes like coal set into dark pits rubbed raw.
... ... ...
I LOVE the word choice here! It's extremely graphic and that type of gory stuff will usually (read: always) get me to pay attention. I can get a very clear picture of what those ghouls look like, especially with that last line.

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"...there's something drama queeny about your anti-drama queenyness"
I like the word choice in this because it kind of describes Tiny as a character just by the way he words it.

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Toyko Heist. The wind, the rain , my soaked converse sneakers. I blame it all on my dad. Its his fault I have waited from him for over an hour. Now I'm slogging downtown through a rainstorm, dragging my suitcase through puddles.
Helps imagine the scene.

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When suddenly a strangling outcry of death shattered her soul. It sounded like an avalanche within the force, an outcry of thousands upon thousands wiped out in an instant.
It uses a simile to compare how the outcry sounded and gives a better description.

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Butter
"Jeanie narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips, making her already pointy face look downright sharp" This is interesting to me because it provides a lot of imagery.

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Dead End
"Balloons dropped from the ceiling and champagne bottles were popped simultaneously. The ceremony had just concluded and the ballroom reception had just begun. All the tables were cleared by men in white jackets and black pants. A dance Floor Appeared."
This is an example of imagery, using descriptive sentences to describe the setting of this section of story

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"Okay, okay, okay, okay, see you after!" he says.
I like the repetition in this because in this case, it creates a sense of haste.

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Kick
My head was spinning and I felt sick to my stomach. I kept asking myself why I was in this place.

The advantages of this technique is that it is describing how this character felt and what was going through his head.

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"...his shot just before the sound of the buzzer echoed through the building."
This quote shows that the author has great use of imagery

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As I watched I got carried away by all the perfectly moving parts

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We the people only live on the top, like the bugs that live on the scum of the still water near the shore.

Example of a Simile

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"Anita Liberty was frustrated by the dearth of self awareness I her fellow classmates."
Strong word choice with "dearth" not a lot of people know what that means or have used it -Denaiya Pendleton

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"Want to play?"
this phrase is repeated a lot in the beginning of the story because the author wants you to remember the phrase

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100 Sideways Miles

"We were all about to witness a Nazi having a stroke."

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Note to Self
"Freak. I'm sad. Sorry for the downer.
I'll be fine.
Eventually."
The author is sharing his thoughts on how he feel about writing the heartbreak experience he had with short sentences getting straight to the point of how he feels.

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He draped his slick burgundy cape over the back of his chair.
This gives adjectives to help build up a better description of the man's cape.

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Thomas Jefferson and the Tripoli Pirates

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Thomas Jefferson and the Tripoli Pirates

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"A violent gale powered by westerly winds raised the Philadelphia.  the once-stranded ship, lifted off the reef by the rising tide, floated free."
This gives a good idea (imagery) of what the USS Philadelphia would have looked like coming off of the reef.

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The killing Woods
"I was in the compound...and she was...she was there and I..." Dad tripped on his words, stopped and tried again. "I didn't mean to...but the enemy, they were hiding...out there in the dark...all around."
This is a good example of dialogue between the characters which makes the story more interesting.

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Stupid Fast
Where to start?
Not in the '70s when Jerri was a little girl. Not ten years ago, when I found my dad dead in the garage, how about last November...football season.

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Perfect chemistry
Time to either back down myself or play the game. The problem is I've never backed down ..........not once in my life.
This is a good example of strong word choice.
There's a thin line between love and hate.

I've had it up to here with you

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"I'd put my money on a latter.
But if I'm wrong,
you'd even love my skepticism."

You can make the readers think about each word and picture the situation -Denaiya Pendleton

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The TIE fighters continued to fire, more often than not.
This gives a better description than just the fighters continued to fire.

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Killing Capes, Scott Mathy

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"You need anything?" I would nod. "Go jump off a bridge, Frank."

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Toyko Heist. The Sky is more November than June, charcoal- smudged clouds all bunching together.
its good descriptive detail

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The Killing Woods
"There was a film of tears wrapping her eyes."
This is a good example of being descriptive.

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Dead End
"Numb. Fractured. Sore. Confused. Angry. Guilty." I chose these sentences as they are a good example of using short sentences to show the pain of how the character is feeling.

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Butter
"That probably would have been enough- just a little website out there among millions- a clue for one or two classmates to find or something for a stranger to sympathize with."
I like it because  of the corrections that make it feel like a human is actually talking.

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When every link to the outside world is severed, time has no meaning. It ceases to exist other than as a dull memory, a vague recollection of what a minute used to be, an hour, a day. Sealed up tight so far beneath the ground, every single second was stretched out almost to infinity--each one a vast and empty abyss where time used to reign, an ageless aeon barren of significance and confidence.
... ... ...
This quote has a very vivid word choice that emphasizes the main character's isolation. I love the word choice and the feeling of hopelessness that I get from it.

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Tiny is like some gigantic sponge soaking up the pain of lost love everywhere he goes.
This is a great example of imagery and metaphor because Tiny obviously isn't literally a sponge but it gives a good visual.

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"Terrell Jamerson was basketball perfection."
This is a nice hyperbole because they are saying how good Terrell is but obviously, nobody is perfect.

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Kick
I kept my head down as I watched my beat up white Nike's clicking against the floor. I sat there shivering in the waiting room of the Bedford County Juvenile Detention Center.

The advantages to using this "descriptive technique" would be to help your writing paint a image in the readers head.

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They went out Lake Brandt Road and turned off just past the lake, following a road that wound down and up until they came to a white clapboard mansion that sprawled along the top of the hill.

This is a good example of imagery.

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"...I have a brief flash of memory as soon as I enter the bathroom stall of standing with Dara in our wet bathing suits, water pooling on the concrete,shivering and giggling after a long day of being in the sun, our fingers sticky with cotton candy, running ahead of our parents, holding hands, while our flip flops slapped on the pavement." She made a connection with the place she is now and what happened when she was younger at the same place.

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" The night began softly. My little sister Deborah, and I were lying in bed, closing our eyes, trying to fall asleep in the mid summer heat. For some reason, Deborah had been highly sentimental that day, hugging my mother and me, telling us she loved us. She did it time and again. I wondered what had come over her."

The short and long sentences cause suspense and shows me that my character is scared .

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"She heard Steward's heavy wheezing, and through the crack where the door hadn't quite shut she saw him adjust the pipes in the rack by the smoking stand and cast a glance over the decanter and glasses."

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"Cassia" he whispers. "I am giving you something you won't understand, yet. But I think you will someday. You, more than the rest. And, remember. Its all right to wonder"

Characterizes the character, thoughtfulness- giving the character something