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"You were the product of the great love that two wounded souls have found."

Gottlieb's daughter and son in law were both broken people. Growing up they each had their struggles they had to overcome. I think they were able to be glued back together when they found each other, and finally healed when Sam was born.

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"Being different is not a problem. it's just being different. But feeling different is a problem."

Your perspective on the world is very malleable. The way you feel can alter it so much. The way people act towards you can also alter it. I think that's the point that the Grandfather is trying to get across with this particular letter.

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https://www.autismspeaks.org/what-autism

This article talks about what autism is and the basic facts about it. People often confuse being on the spectrum with other disorders and it's incredibly important to differentiate them.

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Autism, or autism spectrum disorder (ASD), refers to a broad range of conditions characterized by challenges with social skills, repetitive behaviors, speech and nonverbal communication. According to the Centers for Disease Control, autism affects an estimated 1 in 36 children in the United States today.

We know that there is not one autism but many subtypes, most influenced by a combination of genetic and environmental factors. Because autism is a spectrum disorder, each person with autism has a distinct set of strengths and challenges. The ways in which people with autism learn, think and problem-solve can range from highly skilled to severely challenged. Some people with ASD may require significant support in their daily lives, while others may need less support and, in some cases, live entirely independently.

Several factors may influence the development of autism, and it is often accompanied by sensory sensitivities and medical issues such as gastrointestinal (GI) disorders, seizures or sleep disorders, as well as mental health challenges such as anxiety, depression and attention issues.

Signs of autism usually appear by age 2 or 3. Some associated development delays can appear even earlier, and often, it can be diagnosed as early as 18 months. Research shows that early intervention leads to positive outcomes later in life for people with autism.

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What is autism spectrum disorder (asd)? Click here to read the definition, learn about different types of autism and how to help autistic kids.

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Gottlieb was a psychiatrist, author, radio talk show host, husband, father, and grandfather. He was in a tragic car accident that left him paralyzed from the neck down. He spent the rest of his life in a wheelchair as a quadriplegic. Throughout his life he has experienced great loss and pain, but used these experiences to grow and become a better person. When his grandson was born, Gottlieb decided to write him letters about different lessons.

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"So your job is simply this: trust your instincts, remember your secret pact, and reclaim the wisdom you have always had."

I liked hearing the grandfathers idea of the secret pact. When a child is born, God places his finger upon the child's lips and says "Shh," which transfers all of God's wisdom or knowledge that the child will need in his life.
In Sam's case, the knowledge and wisdom he will need is about his autism, learning to live with it, and accept it.

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Dr. Gottlieb discusses Sam and the books he wrote. He shared stories of him and emphasized the importance of being kind to each other. He stated,  "Sam's soul has always been kind."

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Gottlieb talks a lot about the concept of altruistic love, or unconditional love. It's a specific love in which care, tenderness, and affection is freely given while expecting nothing in return.

Gottlieb is a great example of altruistic love. In terms of his sister, his wife, his daughter, and his grandson. Affection and care just pour out of him.

It's a rare thing to have, in my opinion, and one would be lucky to experience it.

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Daniel Gottlieb had his auto accident in 1979. That year over 51,000 people were killed. Compared to the most recent tallies, in 2018, around 36,500 people were killed from car accidents. Thankfully cars are getting progressively more safer, more actions are being taken, and less people are getting in car accidents.

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Gottlieb stresses to Sam that it's okay to not know the answer to a question or a problem. That's a part of life. You can't know everything. Gottlieb tells a story of how a listener asked him a question on his talk show and his response was "I don't know," and with this response people were reminded of the importance of not knowing everything and admitting you don't know.

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Gottlieb mentions in the book how he has a talk show on the radio. This talk show was called "Voices in the Family" and it was a mental health call-in radio show. I think this helped him understand and cope with the fact that he became a quadriplegic. He was able to talk freely and answer questions. As he helped others heal, i believe this helped him heal as well.

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After reading this book, I sat for awhile and thought about what Sam would think after reading it. He was four when Gottlieb finished the book, so Sam was not at the age to read it let alone comprehend the significance of what his grandfather was sharing with him. I wonder how these letters have shaped Sam's life. How would Sam's life have turned out if his grandfather never wrote him.

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Sometimes, actually most of the time, we are scared of being judged for what we are feeling and thinking. We have many questions and we don't know whom to turn to. This book not only answers your questions but it makes you realize that it's okay to be different and it's okay to be comfortable in your own skin.