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http://www.showme.com/sh/?h=hqfNQAK

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http://www.showme.com/sh/?h=Ynpn3GC

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1. analysis - why text all the way??!. use diagrams. like what you have done previously. put diagrms in table and describe it.

2. you have a concept of 'jumping geometry but u did not explain about it at all. break the the criteria of your concept.

3. you have all models but your models are explaining about your architect's work rather then your own concept. of course u have to reflect the architect's style, but u need to adapt it to yr own concept not to mimic 100% of the architect's style.
plus point: you have a very detail explanation using diagram and description - thats good way of explaining.

4. now concentrate on yr concept of jumping geometry and explain in detail on what is about and how u adapt the architect's style to this concept. then u apply to the manipulation through  the assigned techniques .

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1. models are unique, looks  exactly like zaha hadid's style but i dont see the imaginary identity of a cube at all. it looks like u straight away design a final outcome. u need to retain the identity of the cube, not necessary to look like a cube but at least we can see the imaginary cube identity. or else it just like youre  are imitating zaha's building. of course you need to reflect the architecture style but in yr own way of understanding (concept) and through manipulation of cube.

2. final model suddenly is a cube which totally contrast from the study models. must have some sense of standardization.

3. diagrammatic explanation quite ok but compose clearly ( neat and tidy)

4. 3rd and 9th model has way smaller scale. should have approx. some size as others so it'll look proportion to the rest.

5. your categories of content are clear: where you separate it to background,philosophy, style and concept. just to improve on workmanship

6. not 10th artwork ya. 10th model

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1st board - make it less text, explain   your concept in diagram or mindmap. what are the criteria of the concept.
analysis, again translate understanding in diagram maner like the manipulation ( see shawn ng's group). good diagram for the form manipulation. design elements,principles should be part of the table.

2. your concept/idea is ok, but to elaborate the criteria of the concept for example, vast open, visual privacy? eliminate vis a vis ..etc and this criteria that you mentioned will be applied in your manipulation.

3. your direction is quite clear, in terms of translation concept to your manipulation, but u only emphasize your visual privacy and some visual permeability in your cubes, the other criteria that you mentioned in yr concept should be applied also, or else you can set  2 criteria for each 3 cubes.

4. for the interlocking part (first 2 cubes in left column),u did more stacking than interlocking. pls improve on that.

5. subtraction n addition 1st cube, u can subtract the outer layer but dont just throw it inside. Arrange the internal part and show addition as well.

6. model is not the best esp the brown board model

the rest pls refine. improve on yr diagram and overal composition.

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1. please elaborate your idea of irradiation in detail. diatortion is ok, but what is the criteria of distortion, provide diagram to explain your idea. 'keyword' part is kind of contradict with "materialistic' are u trying to explain about the material or what? maybe the info you have there can be combined with the concept.

2. analysis to present on diagram manner (refer to shawn ng's group).
3. cube: You have a different concept for each cube but not reflected in your concept explanation in the the first.
how is flexibility is related to distortion? how is twisted and crossing is explaining distortion. you have to make it clear. another one  is how is the emotions and thinking is explaining distortion?- curve and wavy means limitation?
4. you outlook of models is just average, need to refine. the translation/the technique that you used also quite confusingespecially the "subtract+addition" and "interlocking technique". pls meet me after break to discuss abt your model.

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1. analysis ,way better than previous tutorial but your writing and sketches overall are very poor.
2. idea  good! quite clear when you
explain it in diagram and descriptions. its just you have to choose between "chaos and calm" or "mayhem" as your concept or direction because for mayhem its totally disorder and chaotic, there's no calm in it.

3. diagram  explanation for cube is lacking but its a good start. u need to explain how each cube reflect your concept and u must show how from a cube it is transformed to the final model (in diagram)
4. cubes are all still basic and raw. to detail out and show the essence of your concept according to the technique

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theres part 2 for the feedback but i couldnt upload. pls come and see me after break

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1. deep content. good
2. nevertheless, u need to explain the concept of "organised chaos" in the detail. i dont see that at the moment. break down the component or the criteria of the concept in mind map or diagram so we can use that as a reference when looking/examine at your cubes.
3. change transformation to "manipulation idea"  and concept to "concept idea" . switch place for both "manipulation idea" and "concept idea". your idea explanation must come first then the explanation abt the manipulation idea. (left to right). the diagram that you use (the thumbnail sketch) should be differentiated between "manipulation idea" and "concept idea". maybe in terms of colour taht u used or border or gap oretc. currently it looks like one flow of explanation. i didnt know that its 2 different explanation at first.

4. always interact/collaborate your sketches/diagram with descriptions. don't separate left and right. (can refer to haiqal's group/evian's group/andrea's group) that is more efficient for clearer understanding.

5. i like the fact that u did not mimic  or imitate the direct style of daniel's libesknd(sharp edges), instead you extract the style and create your own idea (good translation)

6. model composition, try to make it balance left and right. it looks a bit chaotic, or maybe thats the intention im not sure. make sure u have gap between one cube idea and the other (it looks very pack!)

7. perforated part -i suggest u maintain the same two perforated pattern for the two cubes.
8. perforated model should be more 3d rather that flat piece (planes)
9. perforated solid? looks just solid
10. solid model is too raw/basic. to refine and detail out according to concept.