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Since 2016, this group of young people, ages 15-25, have shared their voices and lived experiences to steer, influence and advise the work we do. As well as advising on AET materials and strategy, Panel members speak at events, co-deliver training and support autism education networks.

Find out how this group of young people are supporting, co-producing and advising the AET.

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Helping you support autistic children and young people since 2007

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Winston’s Wish supports bereaved children, young people, their families and the professionals who support them.

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Winston's Wish is the UK's childhood bereavement charity. We support children and their families after the death of someone important.

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Child Bereavement UK supports children and young people (up to age 25), parents and families to rebuild their lives when a child grieves or when a child dies.

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We help children, young people, parents, and families to rebuild their lives when a child grieves or when a child dies.

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from British Dyslexia Association

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Children who are dyslexia often find typing easier than writing. This programme will assist them with their typing skills.

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Learn how to touch type with the BBC Dance Mat Typing game. It’s a fun introduction to touch typing game for kids and covers levels 1, 2, 3, 4.

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Dyslexia support at home

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Practical advice booklet

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Try out some mindfulness ideas

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No Worries! is an interactive self-care activity book for children aged 7+ to colour and doodle their way to happiness, calm and confidence.

The encouraging and simple activities and exercises tackle anxiety, sadness and stress; children will enjoy using their creativity to combat negative feelings, work out why they feel worried and how to put stress back in its place through writing, colouring, doodling and drawing. Featuring the charming and quirky illustrations of Katie Abey, a UK-based illustrator.

Her quirky pictures will keep the reader entertained and focused as they work through the book, or simply dip into the pages for ten minutes of calm colouring.

Part of Mindful Kids a thoughtful new range of activity books for children from Studio Press. Includes an introduction and notes for grown-ups by consultant Dr. Sharie Coombes, Child & Family Psychotherapist. Dr Sharie Coombes is a former primary teacher, headteacher and local authority adviser who retrained as a child and family psychodynamic psychotherapist, neuropsychotherapist, solution-focused therapist, and specialist paediatric hypnotherapist.

Sharie gained a doctorate in education from the University of Brighton in 2007 and is an expert in the therapeutic use of linguistic patterns. Alongside a busy private therapy practice in Brighton, she has worked part-time as a child, adolescent and family psychotherapist at the NHS Tavistock Clinic in London with adopted and fostered children, young people and families.

She now works with the psychosocial team in the British Red Cross Refugee Support and International Family Tracing team.

Sharie has 2 adult children.

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Dr. Sharie, Ed.D, MA (PsychPsych), DHypPsych(UK), Senior QHP, B.Ed. Coombes

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No Worries! Mindful Kids : An activity book for children who sometimes feel anxious or stressed

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No Worries! is an interactive self-care activity book for children aged 7+ to colour and doodle their way to happiness, calm and confidence. The encouraging and simple activities and exercises tackle anxiety, sadness and stress; children will enjoy using their creativity to combat negative feelings, work out why they feel worried and how to put stress back in its place through writing, colouring, doodling and drawing.

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Adults and children

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Physical development lesson clips f

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Early Development - Physical Development - Specialist - Oak National Academy

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Free online specialist video lessons and resources

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Find out more about dyslexia here, where you will find expert articles and videos.

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A story which helps to explain the needs of children with dyslexia.

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Spellings

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Letter Reversals...they are a major cause for handwriting concern by most parent's standards. Here we are covering information about writing letters backwards and what is normal for letter reversals in development. We also have some great tips for addressing common letter reversal struggles and even reversal activities that can help with visual perception handwriting struggles. Read on!

Letter b and d reversals: These specific strategies cover letter b and d reversals.

Letter p and q reversals: You'll find more specific letter reversal information in this post on reversing letter p and q.

Also check out these activities to work on backwards letters.

Writing Letters in Reverse

Do letter reversals mean dyslexia? Not exactly! Dyslexia means problems learning to read, spell, and write. However, there is much more to reversals than what meets the eye, and should be assessed before jumping straight to the conclusion of dyslexia. Be sure to read our resource on Dyslexia and occupational therapy for more information.

One creative tool to support the skills needed for this area of development is our new color by letter worksheet. Just print and go and work on letter identification and matching skills.

Check out all of our letter formation worksheets for more free printables to target letter forming.

Letter Reversals Normal Development

Reversals are age appropriate up until 7-8 years of age!

That's right! Letter reversals are normal up to a certain age range. And when kids write letters backwards it is actually typical development in handwriting skills. Working on letter reversals in occupational therapy (and other visual perceptual areas) can be a common occurrence for school-based OTs...but just because kids are writing letters backwards, it doesn't mean there is a true problem indicating a need for intervention.

It takes our brains that long to integrate all the skills needed to form a letter correctly and automatically during written expression. Skills needed range from phonetic awareness, ability to imitate pre-writing strokes, automation of letter formation, and higher level cognitive skills for multi-tasking.

Some kiddo's develop these skills faster than others. Some kiddo's struggle with these skills and may receive support services such as occupational therapy or pull out services with their school's reading specialist before age 7.

Services provided before age 7 are typically preventative and because the child has shown struggles in the foundation skills needed for reading and writing, such as phonemic awareness, challenges with pre-writing strokes and shape formation (visual motor integration), poor fine motor skills, dominance concerns or underlying vision concerns.

What is a letter reversal

The term Letter reversals refers to several things related to reversing letters in reading or writing:

Writing a specific letter backwards, when they replace a letter with another such as forming a letter b as a d or a letter p as a letter q

Writing a letter upside down or flipped, such as forming a u as an n

Reading a letter backwards, as when kids replace a d with a b

Writing letters backwards as when kids write letters h, n, s, z, etc. in a mirror image

Transposing letters or switching the order of letters when writing

Reversing or writing numbers backwards

Common Letter and Number Reversals

So, knowing that it is quite common developmentally, to reverse letters and numbers up until age 7 or 8, it can also help to know which letters are commonly reversed in writing.

Letter Reversals List

These letters and numbers are often times transposed for one another:

It's easy to see why the letters and numbers listed above are often reversed. They all contain similar pencil strokes. For children that are just learning to write, spatial integration can be still developing. Kids are getting the muscle memory in place can replace one letter or number for another.

These letters are often written backwards:

Each of these letters has a starting point at the top and pencil strokes that then go into a different direction. Children that are still developing handwriting skills are establishing the motor plan for direction changes with the pencil. The can sometimes "guess" the correct direction which results in letters being written backwards.

Numbers that are commonly written backwards include:

Each of these numbers also have a direction change which could easily be confused.

In many cases, working on letter and number formation so the muscle memory is established with fix reversal issues. Using multisensory formation activities helps to establish that motor plan.

Phonetic Awareness and Letter Reversals

The current theory among the educational community is that reversals start with phonemic awareness. If a child is lacking phonemic awareness, they may struggle with letter identification and spelling needed for fluent written expression. Similar struggles may also be seen with numbers, resulting in a negative impact on math skills.

In my clinical experience, I have found that children with high rates of ear infections and PE tubes (ear tubes) struggle with sound awareness. If the kiddo is unable to hear the sound of the letter clearly and consistently, it leads to poor sound awareness.

I have also found that children with difficulties with attention and auditory filtering often pair the wrong letter sound with wrong letter. This is important to note in sessions as it may require remediation by a speech therapist or reading specialist if available. Here is more information and activities for auditory processing.

While phonetics play a large role in reversals, many other foundational skills may influence whether a child will struggle with reversals or not.

Hand Dominance and Letter Reversals

Hand dominance is typically fully developed by five years of age. Right at the same time most children are learning and mastering the formation of letters and numbers. It also coincides with the start of kindergarten, or formal education where children who are struggling may be noticed for the first time. Writing with both hands can be a common struggle and an indicator of hand dominance challenges.

Children with handedness issues, whether it's mixed dominance or delayed development of dominance, are more likely to struggle with left versus right tasks.

This plays into reversal concerns as many of these children cannot consistently discriminate left from right, leading to b's and d's, p's and q's being flipped. Often times, they are unable to recognize that they have made the mistake as their brain is registering the letter as they meant it to be.

Letter Reversals and Visual Processing

Vision is can be one of the biggest challenges facing children who struggle with reversals. Chances are, they have had an underlying vision concern that goes unaddressed or unrecognized during the critical learning period of letters and their sounds.

You will find much more information on visual perception in our free visual perception lab series.

(Children in the U.S. typically begin to learn letters and sounds between 3 and 4 years of age when they enter preschool programs. Curriculums now expect children to know their letters, sounds and how to write them upon entering kindergarten.)

Due to their vision deficit, the child may not consistently see the same image of the letter each time, or may not see the letter that is being taught due to "wandering" eyes or poor abilities to focus on the letter. The kiddo now has a poor foundation from which to build on, due to difficulties with recalling from their visual memory what the letter looks like, and pairing it with the correct sound.

To add to vision deficits, vision is not just what we see, or how the eye's work together. It is also a motor task of taking information in with the eyes and reproducing an image, or in this case, letters on paper. This skill is known as visual motor integration and also plays a role in reversals.

Here are free visual perception worksheets that can address a variety of visual skills.

Visual Motor Integration and Letter Reversals

Visual motor integration allows us to write, draw and paint freely. To do all of these things, we go through a set development of producing pre-writing strokes and basic shapes in imitation to freely producing them from our memories and eventually becoming automatic. Here is more information and activities related to visual motor skills.

Most children learn to imitate these strokes and shapes at a young age from top to bottom and left to right. However, some children do not learn it this way or their brains are not "wired" to follow this pattern of development.

Children who deviate from this pattern may have difficulties with reversals as they struggle to learn and integrate letter stroke combinations in the correct order. When this happens, they struggle to write fluently and reversals may begin to appear.

Signs of poor visual motor integration skills that could lead to reversals include:

Segmental Drawing-drawing a shape one stroke at a time instead of integrated

Bottom to top orientation when drawing

Right to left orientation when drawing

Difficulties crossing the midline during drawing tasks

Rotation of the paper to adjust for angle execution

Failed attempts to imitate basic shapes after the child has stated what the shape is

Executive Functioning and Letter Reversals

Executive functioning skills refer to our higher level thinking that includes attention, multi-tasking and memory, among many other skills. Writing requires all of these skills to be working at their best. If a child is struggling with any of these skills, they may demonstrate reversals and poor overall handwriting.

Reversals and poor handwriting may be the result of the child being unable to recall the strokes of the letter, the sequence of the strokes, what the letter looks like, where to start the letter, how big to make the letter, what each letter sound is, how to spell a word and complete their thought.

Oh, and lets add in that they have to remember how to hold their pencil correctly. For a kiddo who is struggling, this is a CHALLENGE.

There are so many more things that go into writing that may lead to reversals then what I have listed, but are too many to list out.

The main concept of executive functioning is that if the child cannot make it all work together, from fine motor to phonemic awareness to visual motor, they are more likely to struggle with reversals in their work.

Letter Reversal INterventions

It is important to recognize that reversals may be the sign of underlying deficits with foundational skills and should be addressed when they are noticed. The sooner that these underlying deficits are addressed the better off the kiddo will be. Once a child has had a long enough time period to practice incorrectly, it will be that much harder to break the "bad habits" and correct the reversals.

You will find many letter reversal interventions in this blog post.

This resource on letter b and d reversals is a helpful read on how specifically to work on these commonly reversed letters. You'll find multi-sensory writing strategies to address b-d letter reversals.

2. Try "building" letters to establish the motor plan needed to create muscle memory. Use different colors to help children see the ways that the pencil moves when writing letters and numbers. This letter construction activity explains more about this process. This letter building strategy, paired with other forms of multi-sensory handwriting and teaching letters in groups based on the ways the pencil moves can make a big impact.

Addressing some of the other co-existing issues discussed in this article can be a start.

3. Address the motor planning in handwriting necessary for letter and number formation. Strategies that develop motor planning skills utilizing multi-sensory approaches can help with letter reversal.

With handwriting practice of letters with visual, auditory, and kinesthetic sensory channels at the same time, the weaker channel may be reinforced (Berninger, 2000).

Multi-sensory letter reversal strategies include:

4. Work on visual perception with toys and games, and activities to address specific visual perceptual skills or visual motor skills.

5. Use cursive writing in some cases. Here are creative ways to teach cursive and our entire cursive writing series.

6. Gain a better understanding of visual processing and all of the "pieces" of the vision puzzle that play into letter reversal and other concerns by joining thousands of other therapists, teachers, and professionals in the Visual Processing Lab.

7. Use this Vision Screening Tool to identify and address specific vision concerns such as letter reversals.

8. Try some of these activities to address visual motor integration and eye-hand coordination.

9. Try rainbow writing.

Have concerns? Talk to your child's teacher or occupational therapist to address your concerns.

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Letter Reversals and How to Fix Them - The OT Toolbox

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Try these letter reversal strategies to help kids who write letters backwards. Understand what's really going on behind letter reversals in writing.

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If your child is, or may be, dyslexic then we have information, resources and training available to help you to ensure that your child is able to reach their full potential.

You can also find information in our Supporting a Child or Young Person: A Guide for Parents booklet on how to support your child at home, working with your school to secure a diagnosis and support, and what support the law entitles a young person with dyslexia to and how to access it.

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Information, resources and training to help parents ensure their child can reach full potential.

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150 Sensory Ideas

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Special Education and Inclusive Learning

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150 Sensory LEarning Ideas for home-schooling or remote learning EYFS or SEND pupils

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Make sure your child is in the right space to start learning.

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Make sure your child is in the right space to start learning.

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These can be useful to help your child understand the order of activities that they need to complete.

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These can be useful to help your child understand the order of activities that they need to complete.

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12 Amazing Superpowers of students with ADHD 

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12 Amazing Superpowers of students with ADHD 

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The positives of ADHD are numerous and mighty - creativity, empathy, and tenacity, just to name a few. Here, readers share their amazing superpowers.

Thinking positive to find the plus sides of adhd.

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Problem solving skills are a positive about ADHD.

2 of 13

Children use their creativity to build a fort.

3 of 13

A teenager consoles a friend, using her gift of compassion.

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Girl with snorkel by family unpacking van shows her sense of humor.

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The word impossible is written on a chalkboard, with the "im" crossed out, because those with ADHD have perseverance.

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A woman is very observant and employs her keen sense of observation.

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A mom holds her child while also ironing - multitasking is a strength for those with ADHD.

8 of 13

A man is very focused on writing in his notebook. Hyperfocus is a positive trait of ADHD.

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A group of young children are running with endless energy, another positive trait of ADHD.

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A father and son play airplane together. Their seal for life is an ADHD superpower.

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A green apple in a group of oranges illustrates differences. Kids and adults with ADHD are very accepting.

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A road sign has an arrow pointing to Right and another toward wrong. Those with ADHD have a strong moral compass.

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Dough Disco for parents

Looking for ways to combat boredom with your children at home? Dough Disco is a great activity for children and parents. It combines learning and playful fun with loads of YouTube follow along videos to get you going from scratch up to some of our more advanced moves.

Encourage creativity, develop the muscles needed for early mark making and writing and make some wonderful memories for the whole family - Dough Disco will help you with all these things!

Here are some of our "at home" Dough Disco videos that use our basic moves to get you started with your Dough Disco journey:

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Dough Disco is a popular fine motor skill exercise created by Shonette. Can be used to improve brain and muscle development.

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Ball Skills

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Body Awareness

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Balance Activities

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A folder of resources to help children discuss and process their worries

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This page contains affiliate links, read the disclosure statement Inside: Kid tested strategies used by child therapists for calming anxiety, including ideas to calm down, books to read and videos that can help
It's happening again. Your daughter is frustrated and stomping away down to her room, slamming the door and in general "has her cranky pants on". You say calm down, but she yells back "I don't know how to do that!!!"

We tend to tell our kids to "calm down" without ever giving them explicit directions on how to deal with stress and anxiety. Here's a collection of the best tools and tips I've found to teach children how to calm down and relax.

Sometimes you'll need a quick way to help your child calm down and you don't have much with you. Maybe it's when you're out at Target or stuck in traffic. These tips will come in handy at those times:

Imagine your favorite place - it's like taking a mini vacation wherever you are

Think of your favorite things

Name animals alphabetically (alligator, bear, cow, dog, etc...)

Squeeze Something (play dough, clay, silly putty, your fists, a stress ball)

Get a Cold Drink of Water

54321 Grounding - go through each of your 5 senses

1. Put your arms straight out in front of you, palms facing out.

2. Put one hand over the other at the wrists and interlace your fingers.

3. Swoop your hands and arms toward your body and then place your interlaced hands on your chest.

4. Cross your feet at the ankles and put your tongue on the roof of your mouth.

5. Stay still for one minute.

It's great to have a big list of coping skills to try when your child needs to calm down. Here are two more short lists of ideas for calming down at home or at school.

From Imperfect Families - Strategies to use at home

From Encourage Play - 10 Strategies to Help Kids Calm Down at school or home

People usually roll their eyes initially when they hear "breathing is important". But I will continue to say it and explain why. It's so simple, yet has such a big impact on your body's physiology.

When you and calm and relaxed, your body is in "rest and digest" mode. You breathe normally, your heart rate is lower and your muscles are relaxed. However, when stress or anxiety or anger occurs, your body automatically switches into "flight, fight or freeze" mode. Your muscles tense up, your heart rate increases and your breathing becomes more shallow.

Taking deep breaths, instead of shallow breaths, is one way to tell your body to get back to resting and digesting. That's why deep breathing is important!

Luckily, there are some fun ways to teach kids deep breathing techniques

Things to use

Things to say

Breathe in like you are smelling a flower, breathe out like you are blowing out birthday candles

Arms up and breathe in, arms down and breathe out

Pretend your belly is a balloon. Breathe in and make the balloon bigger, then breathe out and make the balloon shrink.

Videos to watch
4 - 7 - 8 Breathing by GoZen
Breathing at Sea Otter Cove from Stress Free Kids

A Coping Skills Toolbox is a kit that you create to help your child calm down when they are upset, anxious or worried. In order to get the most benefit from this, you should create this kit before an issue occurs. When your child experiences anxiety, then they can pick out an item from their Coping Skills Toolbox. This is one of my favorite ways to help kids learn to calm their anxiety.

Here are some other fantastic ideas for what to put in a coping skills toolbox/calm down kit from And Next Comes L

You can create a place specially designed to allow to calm down in a few steps

Find a spot and make it cozy (ask your child for help with that - maybe they can place a favorite blanket or stuffed animal inside)

Add calming tools

Explain how to use it and practice before

When they are starting to escalate, catch it early and give them a calm reminder about their calm down spot

Use the following phrases as a way to support your child, let them know that you're going to support them and help them in any way that you can.

"I'm here for you"

"Talk to me and tell me what's going on"

"How can I help?"

"Together, we can work on this. We're a great team"

"I love you"

"Do you want a hug?"

Here are some more ideas of what to say to calm an anxious child.

From Go Zen - 49 Phrases to Calm an Anxious Child

From Lemon Lime Adventures - What to Say to Calm an Anxious Child

Did you know there are podcasts with stories for children? Usually the hosts have a soothing voice and the stories tend to be pretty short. Your child can listen to these podcasts as a way to have some down time.

There are scripts you can read to your child to help them relax and calm down. Slowly and carefully read the words as your child listens and follows the instructions. Check out Inner Health Studios list of scripts you can use with your child. If you prefer not to read a script, there are ones that are pre-recorded.

There are also scripts to practice mindfulness with children. Eline Snel has written a great book on Mindfulness with Kids, Sitting Still Like a Frog. Here are the several scripts that can be used from that book!

Annaka Harris also has several pre-recorded scripts to help kids practice mindfulness

Confused about how to introduce mindfulness to kids? Check out these resources:
Simple Ways to Introduce Mindfulness and Meditation to Children 11 Simple But Effective Ways to Teach Mindfulness to Kids
What you need:

I've used empty soda bottles, empty water bottles, glass jars and plastic containers. Use whatever makes sense for you and your family. For instance, for the calming jars the kids have in their room, I used a heavy duty plastic bottle. I didn't want them to accidentally knock over a glass jar in the dark - that would be a huge mess!

I've had the best results when I've used warm water - it makes it easier for the water and paint to combine.
Glitter Paint
I prefer using glitter paint (or glitter glue) instead of glitter because then I'm not cleaning up glitter for weeks at my house after we make them :-)

To make your jar, add glitter paint to the bottom of the jar until it just covers the bottom of it. Add warm water. Put the cover on and shake to help the ingredients combine. Once you are satisfied with the look of your jar, then you can super glue the lid shut so it doesn't spill. In a pinch, I've also used duct tape to secure the lid.
Watch Make a Simple Calming Jar from Coping Skills for Kids on YouTube Wet Ingredients
Sometimes you want the glitter/other items to stay afloat longer or for a shorter amount of time. Here are some different ingredients you can use as the wet ingredients.
Dry Ingredients
To see several other ways to make calming jars, take a look at what Preschool Inspirations did.

One of the first things I always like to do with kids if they are struggling is to start using visuals. When you're stressed and anxious, it's harder to read and take in information. Visuals are easier.

I like to keep calming cue cards in my children's coping skills toolboxes so that they can make a decision about what coping skill they can use. Sometimes pulling out a list is too much in the moment. You can make your own cue cards.

1. Take several index cards or small pieces of cardstock

2. On each one, write or draw one coping skill

3. Hole punch the cards and place them on a keyring (to make them extra sturdy, you can laminate them)

4. Put them into the coping skills toolbox for easy access

Using visuals is a powerful way to help kids. When kids are overwhelmed, sometimes it's hard for them to figure out what to do. By having cue cards, your child can have a visual reminder of what calms and relaxes them.

To make things a little easier, I've created ready to use coping skills cue cardsfor you. There are four different sets: Calming, Physical, Distracting, and Processing. If you'd like all 4, I created a set where you can download them all together.

If your child is anxious, they may also be having a difficult time getting settled for bedtime. Here are some ideas to help your child get settled at bedtime.

PINPOINT WHAT THE FEAR IS

One of the most important things to do is to figure out exactly what is causing the anxiety. Is it fear of the dark? Is it a worry about something in the closet? Is it monsters? Is it spiders? Figuring out the cause of the fear will help you come up with ways you can help your child combat it.

REARRANGE THE ROOM

Are there particular spots of the room that seem to be darker or cause more fear at night than others? Go into the bedroom during the day with your child and talk about the spots that make your child nervous. Try moving night lights and furniture around for a more calming room arrangement.

TRANSITIONAL OBJECTS

If your child has a hard time separating from you, try a transitional object. This is a special item that helps your child feel comforted. It helps them feel like part of you is still present even when you're not there. It could be something like a stuffed animal or a special stone or necklace, or a sweatshirt of yours. The object isn't what matters, it's what the object represents. They can keep it and hold it all night long to help them relax and go to sleep.

Find more strategies here: 12 Kid Friendly Strategies to Calm Anxiety at Night

Looking for some calming guided meditation to help get to sleep at night? Try one of these: Best Guided Meditations for Sleep.

Whenever I sit down and talk with someone about their coping skills, one of the first
things I ask is if they have tried writing about it. Why do I always start with journaling as
a way of processing through difficult feelings?

It's easier to write about than talk about hard things

Journaling helps you process what's happening.

It's convenient.

It's not graded

It can help you solve a problem

It can help you re-frame your thinking

Looking for a journal for a child or teen? Check out Big Life Journals!

General Anxiety

The Coping Skills for Kids Workbook by Janine Halloran. This book has over 75 strategies for kids to try to help them manage their stress and worry. This book also includes colorful worksheets to help kids learn more about their anxiety and what they can do to manage their stress.

Wilma Jean the Worry Machine by Julia Cook I love that when Wilma Jean's physical reactions are described, they're also illustrated. When is says she has knots in her stomach and her knees lock, her stomach really looks like it's tied in a knot and there's a real lock around her knees. I love the activity she does with her teacher, going over worries she can control and worries she can't, it's a great way to help kids manage their anxiety.

David and the Worry Beast by Anne Marie Guanci David's anxiety is a beast, and the more anxious he gets, the bigger it grows. David learns to control his thoughts, and his beast shrinks. There's also a couple of pages for parents and kids in the back.

When My Worries Get Too Big by Kari Dunn Buron This book is wonderful! There are several pages where kids can add in their own thoughts, worries and what helps them relax. This book also uses the 5 point scale to talk about stress and different ways to manage it.

What To Do When You Worry Too Much by Dawn Huebner, PhD This book goes through several ways that can help kids manage anxiety, including setting a time for worries, thinking about things that make you happy and resetting your body with activity or relaxation. There are some interactive places in this book, where a child can write down their worries, draw some images of things that might help, etc.

What To Do When You're Scared and Worried by James J. Crist This is one of my favorite books for kids to help them deal with anxiety. Near the beginning of the book is a checklist that helps kids narrow down what they are anxious about. The beginning of the book covers the basics of what anxiety is and how to help manage with coping skills. The next section of the book goes into detail about different types of anxiety kids might experience, including Separation Anxiety, Phobias and Panic Attacks.

Separation Anxiety

The Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn Classic about managing separation anxiety when kids start school. My daughter's kindergarten teacher read this on our visit to school the first day.

When I miss you by Cornelia Maude Spelman This is perfect for little ones who have a hard time dealing with the fact that they are away from their parents during the day. It suggests a couple of things they can do to help and reassurance that parents will come back at the end of the day.

Wemberley Worried by Kevin Henkes Poor Wemberley worries about everything, and then she gets really worried when she is about to start school.

This E-Course offers you instant support from a Child Therapist.
You will get:
12 Videos that are quick and bite size

14 Exercises that will expand on the skills taught

6 Cheat Sheets that will serve as a reference
Along with the course you get:
Access to the instructor for ongoing support

Downloadable PDF versions of all lessons

Lifetime access to the course

More from Coping Skills for Kids about Anxiety in Children...

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Calming Anxiety - Coping Skills for Kids

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Inside: Kid tested strategies used by child therapists for calming anxiety, including ideas to calm down, books to read and videos that can help

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Inside: Kid-friendly coping skills used to help manage anger, including safe ways to express anger, books to read and videos that can help. This post contains affiliate links. Learn more.
It's starting again, as usual, right after your son gets off the school bus. He is frustrated from things that happened during the day, and now he's yelling and stomping around the house. You're feeling overwhelmed and don't know what to do next.
How do you help an angry child?
Here's a collection of the best tools and tips to teach children how to manage their anger in safe and healthy ways. Let's start with some quick, safe ways to help kids express those feelings.

Looking for more quick ideas to help kids express their anger?
Stop sensory meltdowns by hanging upside down 5 simple ways to help children calm angry feelings 10 more ways to help kids manage anger A Different Way to Respond When Your Child is Aggressive
We need to help our kids understand and expect that they will experience a variety of feelings as they go through life, including anger. It's normal to feel angry at times. It's what you do with those feelings that matter.

Here's a great reminder from Imperfect Families that anger is a feeling too.

When a child is in fight, flight or freeze mode, they can't process information as well as when their body is in rest and digest mode. This is not a teachable moment, and they can't take in a lecture at this point. Your goal is to get them through this rough moment. It's best to keep talking to a minimum. When you do speak, make sure you use a neutral, calm, and quiet tone. Keep it short and repeat the same phrase. Repeating it is helpful because they aren't processing information and words as they usually would. Repetition makes it more likely that they'll hear what you are saying.

Phrases that you can say at that moment:

"I'm here for you."

"I love you."

"I want to help you."

"Let me know when you're ready."

"You are mad; I get it."

"I understand."

Looking for some more inspiration for phrases to say? Check this out:
26 Phrases to Calm and Angry Child
When some kids get big feelings, they destroy items around them - rip books, throw toys, etc. If that's the case for your child, it may be helpful for you to set up a safe spot where kids can go when they are angry. In that space, take everything out that can be destroyed or thrown that might injure someone or damage property. If you have more than one floor, set up a safe spot on each level of your home.

If you aren't in the safe spot when your child is dealing with big feelings, move harmful objects out of the way and try to get them to that safe place.

It may make sense to set up their room as a safe place too. We found this helpful when our son was dealing with a lot of angry feelings. We moved his toys and his bookshelf to a different room in the house so he could still play with them. The items that stayed in his room were those things that wouldn't hurt him or us. We did this to keep everyone, including him, safe. And as time went on, and he had better control of his emotions, we were able to add things back to his room.

How to Make a Calm Down Spot at home
Calm Space in Schools
One of the best things you can do is work on teaching coping skills kids can use before things escalate to epic proportions. The trick is practicing when they are in a calm and relaxed mood, not in the moment when they are angry.

Identify Triggers

Start by talking about what's making them angry. Help them identify those triggers, so you both know for the next time. Is it a particular school subject that makes them frustrated? Perhaps being hungry or thirsty? Are their specific noises or locations that are frustrating?

help kids identify where they feel angry in their body

Sometimes, kids don't know they're angry until after the explosion has happened. Help them identify the signs their body gives them that they are feeling angry. Over time, they'll start to recognize that feeling and ideally use a coping skill before things get too overwhelming.

Explore what other emotions they may be feeling

When kids are angry, there are usually other feelings that they are experiencing too. But anger is easy to see and often hides different feelings that lie below the surface. It's sometimes referred to as the "Anger Iceberg." It takes a bit of time to figure it out, but when your child is in a calm place, talk about what other feelings may be hiding underneath their anger.

Read more about the anger iceberg here.

Identify and practice coping skills

Now that they know what causes those big feelings and how to identify them, help them figure out ways to deal with those feelings in safe and healthy ways. Go through the coping skills checklist and have kids check off the skills that work for them, cross off the ones that don't and circle the ones they want to try.

Identify one coping skill your child would like to try. Take a few minutes during the week and have them practice a coping skill they may be able to use next time. For example, if they are going to try using shapes for deep breathing, have them practice before, so they know how it feels. The idea is to have them practice, so they know what it feels like to do it when they are calm.

Using coping skills to deal with big feelings will not go perfectly every time. Learning to manage anger is a work in progress. Little by little, with practice and time, kids will get better at it. Encourage them when they make safe and healthy choices. When they don't, continue to work with them to figure out better steps they can take the next time.

Use a Feelings Thermometer

Using a feelings thermometer can help kids make the connection between their feelings and their coping skills. Here's how you can make an anger thermometer.

How to Make an Anger Thermometer:

Have the child pick out three colors, one for each section of the thermometer and color it in. Then talk about each section.

Ask what it looks like when they are just a little angry, at the bottom of the thermometer. Do they sigh loudly, growl, etc.?

Then move on to the middle section of the thermometer. If they are medium-sized angry, what does that look like? Does their voice get louder? Do they stomp their feet, etc.?

Finally, talk about what it looks like when they are experiencing big anger at the top of the thermometer. What does that look like? Is it yelling, throwing things, etc.?

It isn't always easy for kids to do this. If they are having a hard time identifying what the behaviors were, I tell them what I noticed the last time I saw them get angry. Or, if I haven't seen them angry, I'll give them a prompt to help them, like "When some kids get angry, they yell, is that something you do?"

Once we go through and identify behaviors on the thermometer, then we work on identifying coping skills they can use to calm down. Some examples include getting a drink of water, taking deep breaths, shredding paper, or taking a break.

Make sure they have coping skills that will help them at each level of anger. It's essential to have a variety of coping skills for each level because not all coping skills will work all the time. For some kids, taking a drink of water can help calm them down when they are just slightly angry. However, when they are furious, getting a drink of water won't help. They need to do something different at that point, like take a break.

When Sophie Gets Angry, Really, Really Angry by Molly Bang Poor Sophie has a hard time managing her anger when she has to share gorilla with her sister. It's a visually appealing book to show how big her feelings get and how it looks when she calms down again.

When I Feel Angry by Cornelia Maude Spelman This is part of "The Way I Feel" series. It explains how different things can make you angry, and that feeling angry is an expected part of life, but it's what you do when you're feeling that way that matters.

Cool Down and Work Through Anger by Cheri J. Meiners M.Ed. Another great book that talks about how anger affects your body and suggesting safe ways to express yourself.

Angry Octopus by Lori Lite and Max Stasuyk A great book that actually is a progressive muscle relaxation and deep breathing script for kids. It's wonderful!

Don't Rant and Rave on Wednesdays by Adolph Moser It mentions the consequences of having unchecked anger, and acknowledges that adults struggle with this too. A large part of the book explains different strategies kids can use to express anger in a safe way, which I think is fantastic.

How to Take The Grrrr Out of Anger by Elizabeth Verdick and Marjorie Lisovskis I love using this book for kids who are having a hard time managing being angry. I typically read one chapter at a time with the kids and work on some of the strategies listed in the book.

What to Do When Your Temper Flares by Dawn Huebner This book has lovely illustrations and goes through "anger dousing" methods.

Happiness Doesn't Come from Headstands by Tamara Levitt. This is a beautifully illustrated book all about growth mindset and resilience. Leela wants to do headstands and is getting frustrated, and believes the only way she can be happy is if she does headstands. With the help of a friend, she shifts her focus from what she can't do to what she can and focuses on the journey, not the singular goal is doing a headstand.

The Secret to Clara's Calm by Tamara Levitt. This is another beautifully illustrated book that demonstrates the power of mindfulness in managing big feelings. Clara has a bad temper and has big reactions to small problems, but then that leads to kids not wanting to be around her anymore. She works on learning how to be mindful and manage her big feelings with the help of a bird named Brodhi.

Chillax!: How Ernie Learns to Chill Out, Relax and Take Charge of His Anger by Marcella Marino Craver This is a graphic novel, perfect for the tween set.

It's common for parents to struggle with staying calm when their child is angry. As a mom, I know that's tough, especially when your child is having a difficult time. But it's important to learn to do it. You have to get yourself calm before you can help your child. One of the best ways to help your child is to make sure you stay calm yourself.

Use Self-Talk

Here are some phrases that may help you as you are working with your angry kid:

They're having a hard time, not giving me a hard time.

Share my calm, don't join their chaos.

I am in charge of staying calm, no matter how my child is acting and behaving.

All feelings are OK. My job is to help my kid manage them.

I can remain calm, and be a good example for my child.

Be the thermostat, not the thermometer.

TAKE Deep Breaths

If you're getting upset and about to blow up, try deep breathing. I know, it sounds hokey, but it makes a difference. When you are feeling overwhelmed, your body can go into fight, flight, or freeze mode, but in situations like these, you want to stay in rest and digest mode. By taking deep breaths, you're signaling your body to go back to rest and digest mode. Expand your belly as you inhale, and contract your belly as you exhale. Try taking several deep breaths before you take steps to intervene.

Use a grounding technique

If you're overwhelmed, sometimes it helps to do a grounding exercise to calm yourself down.

FIND your support system

Know that you are not alone. Read what this mom has to say about parenting an angry child. If you don't have a support system, then it's time to find one. Here are some ideas for both in person and online support groups to help you.
In Person Support:
There are lots of places you can get support in person. One resource I love is the National Alliance on Mental Illness. They offer Family Support Groups, which meet regularly. They also offer a 12 week class for parents by parents, called Family to Family Support. Search for your local NAMI chapter here.

Having support for your child outside of your family can be a lifesaver. Talk to the school, teachers and coaches to help support your child during a difficult time. Sharing knowledge about what strategies work, and how you child responds in different environments is invaluable information.

You can also seek help from a licensed therapist to help support you. It's great to have someone to talk through the tough situations you are experiencing. If scheduling an in-person meeting is tough, you can see therapists online at sites like betterhelp.com. Some kids also benefit from seeing their own therapist. Read this to get a little more information about when you should seek outside help for your child.
Facebook Groups:
Did you know you can search for groups on Facebook to find others who are struggling with similar issues to yours? Here are some active Facebook Groups that have been helpful for families.
Note: You may need to apply to some of these groups in order to be added.
Support for Sensory Needs

Raising Poppies

Happy Sensitive Kids Community

Modern Parenting

The Neighborhood, Imperfect Families

The World's Okayest Parents
Coping Skills for Kids Group
As your son continues to stomp and growl, you take a few deep breaths and say to yourself "Be the thermostat, not the thermometer." Then, in a calm voice, you say to your son "I'm here to help. I love you."

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Inside: Kid-friendly coping skills used to help manage anger, including safe ways to express anger, books to read and videos that can help. This post contains affiliate links. Learn more. It's starting again, as usual, right after your son gets off the school bus.

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Lexia Core5® Reading® is a research-proven, blended learning program that accelerates the development of fundamental literacy skills for students of all abilities in grades pre-K-5. Following a rigorous scope and sequence, Core5 provides explicit, systematic instruction through personalized, adaptive learning paths in six areas of reading.

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Making Sense of Sensory Behaviour (parents)

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National Autistic Society
Autism Education Trust
ADHD Solutions
ADDitude
British Dyslexia Association
Mind Charity
Coping Skills for Kids
Twinkl resources
BBC
NHS
Lexia
Hive
Inclusive Teach
Pathway 2 Success
The OT Toolbox
TES Resources
Nessy
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Child Bereavement UK
Oak National Academy
Dragonfly Impact Education
Movement Matters
Mentally Well Schools
Leicestershire County Council

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Sensory Storytime

Here are some children's books to help talk about autism with your child:

We're Amazing, 1, 2, 3! (Written by Leslie Kimmelman. Illustrated by Marybeth Nelson.)

My Brother Charlie (Written by Holly Robinson Peete and Ryan Elizabeth Peete. Illustrated by Shane W. Evans.)

The Girl Who Thought In Pictures: The Story of Dr. Temple Grandin (Written by Julia Finley Mosca. Illustrated by Daniel Rieley.)

Ethan's Story: My Life With Autism (Written by Ethan Rice. Illustrated by Crystal Smalls Ord.)

Different Like Me: My Book Of Autism Heroes (Written by Jennifer Elder. Illustrated by Marc Thomas and Jennifer Elder.)

Autism Is...? (Written by Ymkje Wideman-van der Laan. Illustrated by Rob Feldman.)

All My Stripes: A Story for Children With Autism (Written by Shaina Rudolph and Danielle Royer. Illustrated by Jennifer Zivoin.)

Tacos Anyone? (Written by Marvie Ellis. Illustrated by Jenny Loehr.)

My Friend With Autism (Written by Beverly Bishop. Illustrated by Craig Bishop.)

Cooper and the Big Apple (Written by Camille Cohn. Illustrated by Riley Cohn.)

Hello, My Name Is Max and I Have Autism: An Insight Into the Autistic Mind (Written and illustrated by Max Miller.)

Slug Days (Written by Sara Leach. Illustrated by Rebecca Bender.)

A Friend Like Simon (Written by Kate Gaynor. Illustrated by Caitriona Sweeney.)

Uniquely Wired (Written by Julia Cook. Illustrated by Anita DuFalla.)

Leah's Voice (Written by Lori Demonia. Illustrated by Monique Turchan.)

I Love Being My Own Autistic Self! (Written by Landon Bryce.)

It's an Autism Thing - I'll help you understand (Written by Emma Dalmayne)

Susie Spins (Written by Emma Dalmayne)

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Kids Zone

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Helping you support autistic children and young people since 2007

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15 tips for parents

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Top Tips Supporting Children with ASD (1)

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We are the UKs leading charity for autistic people and their families. Since 1962, we have been providing support, guidance and advice, as well as campaigning for improved rights, services and opportunities to help create a society that works for autistic people.

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Part one: images to help your child with their home routine

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Part two: images to help your child with their home routine.

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About Us

ADHD Solutions CIC is an independent not for profit community-based initiative set up to support children, young people and adults who have ADHD and other co-existing neurodiverse traits, their families, and the professionals that support or work alongside them.

Our Services

We deliver a range of high-quality client centred holistic services. We work collaboratively with family members, professionals and practitioners to reduce the stigma and promote an appreciation of the positive aspects of ADHD. We teach practical strategies and interventions that can be adapted for use in all settings and throughout life. All our programmes build knowledge, understanding and confidence allowing individuals to take back control and with support, achieve their full potential. Vist the pages below to find out more information about the services we offer.

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Please note, whilst we try and maintain our services as free access to families, depending on our funding at the time of your referral to us, some may require payment or a contribution to access.

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Working with the best funders and supportors

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About Us ADHD Solutions CIC is an independent not for profit community-based initiative set up to support children, young people and adults who have ADHD and other co-existing neurodiverse traits, their families, and the professionals that support or work alongside them. Our Services We deliver a range of high-quality client centred holistic services.

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Books about ADHD for children and parents

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Books about ADHD for children and parents

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