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According to Statistics Canada, in 2014 there was 4,254 suicides in Canada.

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Often times for people with high anxiety or depression, it can be hard to make and communicate with friends. Here is some tips for communicating with others.

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Here's some good tips for communicating effectively, that are useful to all relationships.
Use 'I'-statements

As you might've seen in styles of communication 'you-statements' put people on the defensive and often lead to a hostile response. On the other hand, 'I-statements' have the opposite effect. When we point the finger at ourselves (rather than the other person) and avoid blaming them, we usually get a more positive response. For example, 'I feel disappointed that you cancelled at the last minute' rather than 'You've let me down again'.

Clearly express how you feel

Mind-reading and assuming that others know what you want can create all sorts of problems. When you hint rather than make a clear statement, people don't always get the message. Similarly, when you ramble on rather than state your thoughts clearly, people may not get the message. So, if there is something that you need to say it's helpful to tell it as it is - don't hint.

Do it now

If there's an issue you need to raise or a situation that needs to be resolved, try to deal with it as soon as possible. The longer you leave it, the harder it gets, and the more tension builds up. The only exception to this rule is if you feel very angry, and you can't trust yourself to stay calm when you talk about it. In this situation, it's often a good idea to have a cooling off period before you raise the issue. Doing this prevents conflict and reduces the likelihood that you'll say things you'll regret. Take as long as you need.

Ask for clarification

Just as people can't always read your mind, sometimes it is difficult to interpret what someone else is thinking or feeling. If you're confused about the message you're receiving, the best thing to do is check it out with the other person. Asking for clarification helps to prevent misunderstandings.

For example, a friend seems withdrawn and you suspect they are angry with you. You say: 'You seem quiet - have I done something to upset you?' or 'Is everything OK?' Checking it out with them can help bring the issue to the surface (if there is one), then you can talk about it.

On the other hand, if there is actually nothing wrong, talking about it will ease your concerns.

Acknowledge your discomfort in raising an issue

If you feel uncomfortable raising a particular issue, it can be helpful to let the other person know this, for example: 'Look Sam I feel really awkward about bringing this up but...' or 'Alex, I need to talk to you about something and I'm feeling nervous about it. I don't want to hurt your feelings, but if I don't say anything, I think I'll continue to feel upset.'

By honestly referring to your discomfort, you lower the temperature, reducing the likelihood that the other person will become hostile or defensive.

Be aware of your body language

The way you speak - including the volume and tone of your voice, your physical gestures, and facial expressions, all have an important impact on how your message will be received. If you fold your arms in front of your chest, have a stern expression on your face or speak in an accusing tone, the other person is likely to feel defensive even before they have heard what you have to say.

On the other hand, an open posture, a calm voice, and relaxed body language helps the other person to feel at ease. This allows your message to be delivered in a non-threatening way. Here's an acronym that might help you remember good body language:

S - face the person Squarely

O - Open Posture, no crossed arms or fidgeting

L - Lean towards the person, not too much but just enough to show interest

E - maintain Eye contact, without staring

R - be Relaxed, don't fidget and be comfortable

Communicate positive feelings

Developing good relationships means being able to express positive feelings at times. We often assume that people know that we like them or appreciate what they do for us, so we don't tell them. However, people aren't mind-readers. If we don't tell them they don't always know (even if they do know, it's still nice to hear someone say nice things every now and then!)

Communicating positive feelings towards others lets them know that we value them and helps to strengthen relationships. Warm feelings can be expressed as a whole message. For example: 'Jo, the other day when I was upset you asked me if I was OK. It was really good to talk to you. I just wanted to say thanks - you've been a good friend.'

Alternatively, you can communicate warm feelings by making simple statements such as: 'Thanks for being there for me the other day' or 'You've been a good friend - I really appreciate it.' Your bill of rights You have the right to: 1. express your opinion 2. say 'no' 3. make mistakes 4. change your mind 5. disagree with others 6. ask for what you want 7. be treated with respect 8. not take responsibility for other people's problems.

Over to you

Expressing positive emotions Is there someone you value who could do with some positive feedback from you? What would you like to say to them? Remember that good communication skills can help us to have healthy relationships with people, avoid conflict and solve problems - so they're worth working on!

Tensions often arise in relationships when you avoid saying what you need to say, or when you communicate in a threatening or hostile manner. However, using effective communication strategies such as whole messages, 'I-statements' (see the effective communication and communication - getting the message across fact sheets) and the tips in this fact sheet can help you to resolve problems and disagreements in a reasonable and helpful way.

Acknowledgements

This fact sheet comes from: Taking Charge! A Guide for Teenagers: Practical Ways to Overcome Stress, Hassles and Upsetting Emotions. By: Dr. Sarah Edelman and Louise Remond, Foundation for Life Sciences (2005).

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Tips for communicating with your friend effectively - ReachOut | ReachOut.com

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Here's some good tips for communicating effectively, that are useful to all relationships. As you might've seen in styles of communication 'you-statements' put people on the defensive and often lead to a hostile response. On the other hand, 'I-statements' have the opposite effect.

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School can make things very stressful, and often times gives students feelings of anxiety. For extra help in school you could try going to a tutor, to help with schoolwork, and hopefully make things at school less stressful.

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We are the only in-home tutoring service that gives your child a personalized academic & mentorship plan.

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Ontario Shores Center is a public teaching hospital providing help and treatment to those with serious mental illness. It is a positive environment of care, compassion and inspiration to achieve a successful outcome for all patients.  The workers there use the best clinical practices and the most advanced research.

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Ontario Shores Centre for Mental Health Sciences

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Get the help you need WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU! Ontario Shores is developing its next 4 year Strategic Plan. Please visit planningfortomorrow.ca to share your thoughts about the future of mental health care.

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Here is a list of somethings to try when you are feeling lonely or upset.

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Although my writing often focuses on chronic illness, anyone can feel the pain of loneliness. I hope the tips in this article will be helpful for everyone:

1. Don't blame yourself in any way, shape, or form.

Trust me, it will only make you feel worse. Blaming yourself for how you feel is never skillful, productive, or kind. A host of causes and conditions have come together in your life to create this painful feeling. It's not your fault.

2. Seek relief from a non-human "friend."

There are lots of possibilities-a pet, comfort food, a favorite book or a nature show on TV, or even just sitting outside for a while. We can find solace in many things that ease the pain of loneliness. Experiment and see what helps you feel better.

3. Connect with a human friend if you can.

Think of someone who is always supportive or who simply makes you laugh, and give that person a call or send them an email. You may resist doing this at first because it can be hard to reach out to others when you're feeling lonely. In my experience, however, it's worth giving myself the little extra push that's needed to contact someone I can count on.

4. Do something creative, no matter how simple.

It need not be earth-shatteringly creative. Try a coloring book or a jigsaw puzzle, make a collage, or experiment with needlework of some kind. Or think outside the box and come up with something that is fun and soothing for you to do.

5. Help someone in need.

Helping others eases loneliness because it makes us be less self-focused. It could be an elderly neighbor or someone on a social-media site who might benefit from a supportive comment.

6. Call to mind others who are feeling lonely and send them kind and compassionate thoughts.

Wishing well to others who are lonely creates a special connection between the two of you. Even more, when you realize that you're not alone in your loneliness, you'll feel less lonely. At least, that's how this little practice works for me.

7. Visualize some place you'd like to be-a fun gathering, the seashore, a sporting event-and see if, just for a moment, you can feel happy for those who are there.

Feeling happy for others even when they're doing what you wish you could do can make you feel as if you're there with them, and that eases the pain of loneliness. Even if feeling happy for others only lasts a short time, it's soothing and healing-and amazingly, it can even make you feel happy! (For a more detailed explanation of this practice, see my recent post, " Feeling Happy for Others Can Make You Happy.")

8. Treat loneliness as an old friend who's dropped in for a visit (despite not having received an invitation).

This is a way of not resisting how you're feeling; resisting only makes you feel worse. Zen teacher Thich Nhat Hanh asks us to take care of our anger and other painful emotions. Making friends with how we feel is self-compassion in action. So take care of your loneliness as if it's an old friend. Sometimes I say, "Hello, loneliness. I see you've come to visit again for a while." When you let painful emotions into your heart with compassion, it disarms them and that takes away their sting. This eases your pain.

9. Remind yourself that life is not always fun, and that tomorrow is a new day.

Nobody gets their way all the time and-let's face it-life isn't always fun. This is true for everyone. The bottom line is that loneliness is one of those unpleasant moments in your life. That's all it is. In the words of Rainer Maria Rilke, "No feeling is final." If you can be patient with your loneliness, it's likely that by tomorrow, it will have eased a bit. Then, the next day, it's likely to have eased even more. All emotions are impermanent. They arise and pass, arise and pass.

10. Sing.

It's almost impossible to feel lonely when you're singing. I've tried it, and it works! Let your favorite singer keep you company as you sing along, karaoke style.

I know from personal experience that loneliness can be hard to bear. I hope this piece has given you some useful ideas to try.
© 2016 Toni Bernhard. Thank you for reading my work. I'm the author of three books. All of them contain more suggestions and practices for easing the pain of loneliness: All of my books are available in audio format from Amazon, audible.com, and iTunes. Visit www.tonibernhard.com for more information. Using the envelope icon, you can email this piece to others. I'm active on Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter. See also "How to Turn Loneliness into Sweet Solitude" and "10 Quotations and Reflections on Loneliness."

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10 Things to Try When You're Feeling Lonely

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Although my writing often focuses on chronic illness, anyone can feel the pain of loneliness. I hope the tips in this article will be helpful for everyone: 1. Don't blame yourself in any way, shape, or form. Trust me, it will only make you feel worse.

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Kids Help Phone is a 24 hour hotline with trained counselors who are trained in talking about many different problems teens face. The counselors do not judge you, they're just there to help.

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If you are ever feeling really depressed and suicidal, you can call the National Suicide Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255

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The Canadian Institutes of health research say that as many as 1 in 3 Canadian student have reported bullying. And although 38% of males and 30% of females reported being bullied, females are more likely to be bullied online.

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Depression can be a hard topic to talk to people about, but its better to talk to someone about it so you can get help.

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Sabrina Benaim - Explaining My Depression to My Mother

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The Refuge is a place of healing for those with severe depression. They evaluate each persons symptoms to come up with the best recovery plan, considering everyone's depression and symptoms are different. Their therapists are trained to deal with all different types of emotional pain.

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When you come to our center for treatment of your depression, our assessment team will perform a complete evaluation to gain further information about your symptoms so that we can determine the most appropriate treatment plan. While people who suffer from depression share certain symptoms, depression has numerous causes, co-occurring disorders, and effects, so each person's experience of the illness is unique. Depression is a complex disorder which, if left untreated, can cause great suffering. Often, physicians and mental health professionals recommend residential rehab like The Refuge so you have the opportunity to address your difficulties. We provide a safe environment for you to explore painful topics and deal with challenges depression has caused in your life. Our therapists are trained to deal with a multitude of problems and can help address your emotional pain.

Why Consider Residential Treatment at Our Center?

Chronic depression can become a serious problem, affecting your ability to make decisions, hold a job, attend school, and interact socially. In serious cases, depression can become so debilitating you may feel you can no longer function in major areas of your life. Sometimes, people attempt to self-medicate the symptoms of depression with drugs or alcohol or feel they want to hurt or kill themselves. Depression is commonly experienced with other disorders, notably anxiety disorders, and is frequently the result of trauma.

The complexity of depression and existence of additional symptoms calls for the special resources, a variety of treatment options, frequent monitoring, and support offered by residential rehab. At our center, we provide these services to ensure you receive the best possible depression treatment possible in a warm, nurturing environment. Residential treatment for depression is one of the most effective forms of intervention available as it allows you the opportunity to work through your problems while leaving the stress of your home environment. A residential depression treatment center allows you the opportunity to focus on what truly matters - recovery.

Our Rehab Philosophy and Benefits

At The Refuge, we always consider the entire person when we create a treatment plan, involving all aspects of what makes each client unique. We're constantly reevaluating our clients to make sure all his or her needs are met in a supportive atmosphere. As a holistic treatment center, we work closely with each client to guide him or her on the pathway toward recovery from depression.

Types of Treatment Offered at Our Center

The Refuge employs a number of treatment options for clients struggling with depression and/or co-occurring disorders. Each client admitted to our residential rehab center will undergo a number of assessments in order to make certain our treatment team understands how best to treat you. The medical examination will determine if you are struggling with medical complications while our psychiatric evaluation will diagnose any co-occurring disorders. Your treatment center team will take the results of these assessments and work with you and your loved ones to create a plan of care for your stay with us.

Medication may be used at the beginning of your stay to reduce anxiety and other symptoms. Some clients are able to be weaned off their medication as they learn more adaptive coping mechanisms. However, many of our clients who have depression may take antidepressants for the long-term to keep symptoms at bay. Medication usage will be closely monitored by your rehab center team and adjusted as needed.

Individual therapy is provided to address personal issues related to your depression and identify links between the depression and other co-occurring disorders. Our therapists use cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) which addresses errors or distortions in thinking, helping the person to challenge such thoughts and replace them with more adaptive ways of evaluating their world.

Group therapy is a common type of therapy we use at our rehab center as it allows our clients to bond, work together to solve problems, and process difficult emotions. You'll experience a number of types of group therapy. Process groups discuss issues related to a common theme or co-occurring problems such as trauma, substance abuse, or suicide attempts. Our skills-based groups focus upon topics like new coping strategies, re-entering social situations, risks for triggering depression, strategies related to dealing with co-occurring conditions, and relapse prevention.

Family therapy is an important aspect of depression treatment at our center as our clients are part of larger systems of loved ones, family, and friends who need to be included in the healing process. During family sessions, you'll have the opportunity to work with your loved ones to teach them about depression, the treatments, and progress you've made. We'll also allow your loved ones the chance to discuss ways in which your depression has impacted their lives.

Our rehab center offers a variety of experiential methods designed to complement traditional therapies. These therapeutic methods may include the following:

Continuing Care - What Comes Next?

As the time for your discharge approaches, you and your treatment team will sit down with your loved ones and create a plan of care for your continued treatment. Some clients feel they have made enough progress in our depression rehab center that they are able to return home with referrals and appointments for outpatient services and available community resources. Our expert treatment staff will help you guide you through the process.

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Learn about depression treatment at The Refuge. We treat substance abuse and mental health disorders, including depression, at our specialized rehab center. The Refuge, A Healing Place is a nationally recognized treatment center focused on trauma rehab and co-occurring disorders.

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Victims of bullying can call Canada's Bullying help line at 1-877-352-4497

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BullyingCanada is Canada's only wrap-around mental health service for bullied youth. We work one-on-one with them, their parents and local supports for as long as it takes to bring an end to the bullying and help them heal.

Our Lifeline: Bullied Youth Support Network provides a safe space for youth to reach out by phone, texting or email, for expert help in bullying intervention and to learn how to deal with bullies.

Our highly trained volunteer Support Responders and professional Counsellors work with children and youth to prevent them from being bullied, create lasting solutions and help them heal from the trauma of being bullied. We also deliver Empowering Youth Workshops at schools, community centres and sports clubs on recognizing and handling bullying.

Unlike any other charity, we help to bring kids peace again by working with their parents, teachers, school principal and guidance counsellor, their tormentors, local social services and even police when necessary. By working with their school and its school board, we ensure schools have a bullying policy and know how to enforce it.

Our team is passionate about empowering bullied kids and creating safe, inclusive environments for them to live in. We are here, day or night, to listen, provide guidance and give them the brighter future that they deserve.

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BullyingCanada - giving bullied kids a brighter future

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BullyingCanada is the only national organization that resolves bullying situations for Canadian youth by directly facilitating communication between bullied kids, their tormentors, parents, teachers, school boards, social services, and, when necessary, police.

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Anxiety is an overwhelming feeling of worry or nervousness, usually provoked by a social or stressful event. Anxiety disorders are among the most common mental health issues in Canada.