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Is mental health an issue for teenagers?

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Is mental health an issue for teenagers?

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Yes,

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Kids and teens are constantly changing. They grow up quickly and before you know it, your giggly, energetic toddler is a teenager who sleeps until noon. As we grow, it's normal to change as we learn new things and our bodies transform into our adult selves. But with all these changes going on, how can we tell which changes are normal? At what point should we start worrying that our child's tantrums or teenager's mood swings are more than just "growing pains?" It can be hard to tell. The truth is, for many kids, these sudden changes aren't just a part of growing up-they're symptoms of a mental illness.

What is it?

Mental illnesses are surprisingly common in children and youth. About one in seven young people in BC-or 14%-will experience a mental illness at some point. Many mental illnesses-between 50% and about 70%-show up before the age of 18, so they can have a huge impact on a child's development. Mental illnesses can affect how well kids do in school and how they form relationships with other kids and adults. Mental illnesses, if not treated early, can be disruptive enough to a kid's normal development that it can affect them for the rest of their lives. Below are some common mental illnesses that affect children and teens:

Anxiety disorders are the most common illness to affect children and youth. About 6% of kids experience an anxiety disorder at some point. Anxiety disorders can cause kids to be extremely afraid of things or situations to the point that it interferes with daily life.

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) affects just under 5% of BC children at any given time. ADHD makes it very difficult for kids to focus their attention. A child with ADHD is also more impulsive and harder to settle down than other children.

Conduct disorder affects about 3% of BC children. It leads children to be extremely aggressive and destructive toward other people, pets or property. They may also seem like they don't care about important but basic rules, such as by doing things like regularly skipping school or running away from home.

Depression is a mood disorder that shows up most often during the teenage years. About 3.5% of young people in BC experience depression. Depression can affect a child or youth's attitudes and emotions, making them feel unusually sad or irritated for more than two weeks at a time.

Psychosis is a condition that involves loss of contact with reality. It affects 3% of the total population but most often appears later in adolescence and early adulthood. It can be seen on its own or with many of the illnesses mentioned in this info sheet.

Bipolar disorder is a mood disorder that may affect up to about 1% of young people. It usually starts during the teenage years, but in rare cases, it may be seen in younger children. Bipolar disorder can cause a young person's moods to change back and forth between extremely high moods, called mania, and extremely low moods, called depression.

Eating disorders are less common in young children, but the risk increases with age. Anorexia affects up to 1% of young males and females aged 15-24, and bulimia affects up to 3% of young people in Canada. Eating disorders involve a distorted body image along with seriously harmful behaviours to manage food and weight, making it difficult to nourish oneself properly.

Schizophrenia affects about 1% of the total population, and usually shows up between the ages of 15 and 25. Schizophrenia makes it hard for people to think and speak in an organized way. It can also cause people to lose touch with reality.

Suicide often goes alongside a mental illness. Suicide continues to be the second leading cause of death among 15 to 24 year-olds in BC, after motor vehicle accidents. Suicidal thinking or attempts are also common. A BC survey found that in one year, 5% of youth had made a suicide attempt and 12% seriously thought about suicide.

Who does it affect?

Just as with adults, mental illnesses can affect kids and teens from all family types and cultural backgrounds. Kids and teens in certain situations, though, can be at higher risk for mental illnesses and may also face additional barriers to getting help. Some of these situations include:

Young people with a family history of mental illness

New immigrants and refugees

Aboriginal children and youth

Young people who've gone through a major life change such as moving to a new city or new school

Young people who have faced or witnessed trauma, including abuse

Gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender youth

Young people with substance use problems

Could my child have a mental illness?

It can be hard to tell the difference between normal changes as a child grows, and the symptoms of mental illness. Has your child:

Shown sudden changes in their behaviour? (e.g., an active child becomes quiet and withdrawn or a good student suddenly starts getting poor grades)

Suddenly changed their feelings? (e.g., a child may show signs of feeling unhappy, worried, guilty, angry, fearful, hopeless or rejected)

Started avoiding places or situations that others don't routinely avoid?

Recently complained of physical problems like frequent headaches or stomach aches, problems eating or sleeping, or a general lack of energy?

Started suddenly keeping to themselves?

Started to use (or is using more) alcohol or other drugs, especially when alone?

Shown signs that they're having trouble coping with regular activities and everyday problems?

Shown little regard for the feelings or property of others?

Expressed terror or disgust over their weight, or changed how they eat, in unhealthy ways?

Started making odd or repetitive movements beyond regular playing?

Deliberately hurt themselves or talked of suicide?

If your child is showing one or more of these changes, and it's impacting their daily life, the best thing to do is talk to them about how they're feeling and then talk to your family doctor to rule out other explanations. Then, it's important to connect to other supports in the school and community. Keep in mind that all talk of suicide must be taken seriously.

What can I do about it?

Unfortunately, only one in four kids and teens in Canada who need mental health treatment can get it. There are many reasons for this. Parents and caregivers can have mixed feelings about getting their children help for their mental illness. They may worry about being blamed for their child's change in behaviour, or they worry about what treatments may be tried. Mental illnesses can be frightening, and many people worry what others will think if they talk about their experiences. The good news is that mental illnesses can be treated successfully, and early treatment can help reduce the impact of a mental illness on your child's life. The kind of treatment that works best for your child will depend on your child's needs. Talk to your doctor to learn more about the different options.

Counseling:

Cognitive-behavioural therapy-Helps young people recognize and change thinking patterns and behaviours that are not good for their mental health

Family therapy-Can help you look at what you can do as a family to help your child through their mental illness, and manage behaviours.

Interpersonal therapy-Helps young people to feel more comfortable interacting with others.

Educational interventions-Can help your child by teaching them ways to manage the time in the classroom.

Medication:

There many different types of medications that are being prescribed to kids including medications for mood, for anxiety, for psychosis, and for ADHD. If you aren't comfortable with your child taking medications, then express your concerns to your doctor. They can explain which medications, if any, would be right for your child and go over the benefits and risks of medications with you. For young people, medications are usually not the first type of treatment considered. If they're suggested, they are usually meant to work in connection with other treatments or supports.

Support groups:

For teens, groups of others who've gone through or are going through what you're going through (sometimes called peer support groups)

Groups for family members of someone with a mental illness, including children, to meet other families in similar situations

Where do I go from here?

Many parents and care providers want to get help for a young person with mental health problems, but don't know how or where to do it. Navigating the range of services in BC for child and youth mental health-including support from your child's school, family doctor, and Ministry of Children and Family Development child and youth mental health team-can be difficult. Resources to help you find help, available in English only, are

AnxietyBC
Visit www.anxietybc.com or call 604-525-7566 for information, tools, and community resources on anxiety. You'll find resources for parents of children who experience anxiety problems, including video, information, strategies to try at home, and tips for talking about anxiety with children. You'll also find AnxietyBC Youth, a site for young people. For AnxietyBC Youth, visit youth.anxietybc.com.

Resources available in many languages:
*For each service below, if English is not your first language, say the name of your preferred language in English to be connected to an interpreter. More than 100 languages are available.

© 2014

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Kids and teens are constantly changing. They grow up quickly and before you know it, your giggly, energetic toddler is a teenager who sleeps until noon. As we grow, it's normal to change as we learn new things and our bodies transform into our adult selves.

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What does an emotionally healthy person look like?

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What does an emotionally healthy person look like?

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Most of us pay close attention to our health and treat threats to our physical well-being as soon as they occur. We dress warmly when we feel a cold coming on, we apply antibacterial ointments and bandages to cuts and scrapes, and we don't pick at scabs as they heal. We sustain psychological injuries just as often as we do physical ones, but we are much less proactive about protecting our psychological well-being than we are our physical well-being. Adopting the following seven habits, and "treating" common psychological injuries when they occur, will help protect your mental health and improve your emotional resilience.
1. Gain Control After a Failure
Failure distorts our perceptions such that our goals seem more out of reach and our capacities seem less up to the task. Once we feel as though there is little we can do to succeed, we become demoralized and lose our motivation. Adopt the habit of ignoring this misleading gut reaction and make a list of the many factors related to your goal that were in your control-effort, preparation, planning, different approaches you could have taken, etc. Then, consider how you might go about improving each of these factors. Doing so will not only combat defeatist misperceptions, it will drastically improve your chances of future success.
2. Find Meaning in Loss and Trauma
One of the main factors that distinguishes those who thrive emotionally after experiencing loss or trauma from those who do not is their ability to eventually find meaning in their experiences and to derive purpose from them. Of course, doing so takes time, as does the process of grieving and adapting to new realities. However, adopting the habit of searching for ways to recognize not just what you've lost, but what you've gained as well, will allow you to develop new appreciation for your life and the people in it, to make important changes, and to find value, meaning, and purpose even if you lacked them before.
3. Disrupt the Urge to Brood and Ruminate
When we brood over distressing events we rarely gain insight into them. Instead, we replay upsetting or angering scenarios in our heads, which only increases our urge to brood and makes us feel worse. ( Read more about the dangers of brooding.) Therefore, despite how compelling the urge to brood is, adopt the habit of disrupting the brooding cycle as soon as you catch yourself ruminating about the events in question. The best way to do this is to distract yourself with a task that requires concentration -such as a game of Sudoku, trying to recall the exact order of the stations on your bus/subway line, or watching an absorbing show.
4. Nurture Your Self-Esteem
Our self-esteem fluctuates such that we feel better about ourselves some days than we do others. But many of us become self-critical when we're feeling bad, essentially kicking our self-esteem when it's already down. To improve your mental health, adopt the habit of regarding your self-esteem as an "emotional immune system" that needs to be nurtured back to health when it's ailing. ( Read more about that here.) The best way to heal damaged self-esteem is to practice self-compassion. When you have self-critical thoughts, consider what you would do if a dear friend had similar feelings. Write out what you would say to them in an email if you wanted to express compassion and support. Then read the email as if they had sent it to you.
5. Revive Your Self-Worth after a Rejection
Rejections are so hurtful that we often try to make sense of our emotional pain by finding fault in ourselves. Our reasoning is that if we hurt so much, we must be really weak/pathetic/a loser/unworthy/fragile/unlovable, etc. Rejection hurts as it does not because there's something wrong with us but because of how our brains are wired. ( Read more about that here.) The best way to ease emotional pain and revive your self-worth after a rejection is to adopt the habit of affirming aspects of yourself you value, qualities you possess that you find meaningful (e.g., loyalty, compassion, creativity, or a strong work-ethic). Make a list of such attributes, choose one or two and write a short essay about why the quality is important to you.
6. Combat Loneliness by Identifying Self-Defeating Behaviors
Chronic loneliness is much more common then we realize and it has a devastating impact on our emotional and physical health. (Read how loneliness can shorten your life-expectancy.) The problem is that once we feel lonely, we often act in ways to minimize the risk of further rejection by unconsciously engaging in self-defeating behaviors and sabotaging opportunities to make new social connections or to deepen existing ones. The best way to combat loneliness is to adopt the habit of identifying and challenging such self-defeating behaviors. Make a list of excuses you've used to avoid taking the initiative in social situations- I won't know anyone at the party so why go?; They don't call me so why should I call them?; They're probably too busy to meet up; I can't just introduce myself to a stranger at a cocktail party. Now make a list of people whose company you've enjoyed in the past (go through your phone book, Facebook friends, and Email contacts) and reach out to one or two each day to initiate plans until your social calendar is full. Challenge yourself to avoid using excuses from your list when you feel anxious.
7. Shed Excessive Guilt by Repairing Damaged Relationships
Excessive guilt occurs when our actions or inactions have harmed another person (most often a close friend or relative) who has not forgiven us for our wrongdoing. Such situations usually have more to do with the inadequacy of our apologies than with the inability of the other person to "let go" of their hurt. Indeed, the crucial ingredient an effective apology requires-and the one we most often miss-is . For the other person to truly forgive you, adopt the habit of conveying effective apologies when you've done wrong. To do so, make sure the other person feels that you totally "get" how they felt as well as how they were impacted by your actions ( read more about rendering effective apologies here). Once you've expressed adequate empathy, the other person is much more likely to feel your apology is sincere and to convey authentic forgiveness. Your guilt will dissolve soon thereafter.
Copyright 2013 Guy Winch

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The 7 Habits of Highly Emotionally Healthy People

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Most of us pay close attention to our health and treat threats to our physical well-being as soon as they occur. We dress warmly when we feel a cold coming on, we apply antibacterial ointments and bandages to cuts and scrapes, and we don't pick at scabs as they heal.

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Are emotions bad? Which ones? If I didn’t have “bad’ emotions, what would life look like?

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Are emotions bad? Which ones? If I didn’t have “bad’ emotions, what would life look like?

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Wherever I teach in the world, I find people were raised to show only good emotions and hide the others. We were told that good leaders, good friends, and good parents show optimism, enthusiasm, compassion, pride, and a good sense of humor.

We also learned that emotions such as disappointment, fear, anger, and guilt drain everyone's energy, hurt other's feelings, and spoil a good time. They are called negative or bad emotions. You should keep them to yourself.

I would like you to consider a different view of emotions. All emotions are a part of your human experience. You can't experience joy without sorrow, peace without anger, and courage without fear. Life is richer when we allow ourselves to move through the dark as well as the light. The late Israeli leader Golda Meir said, "Those who don't know how to weep with their whole hearts don't know how to laugh either."

All humans in every culture laugh, cry, and express emotions through facial expressions and posture. We cry, we kiss, we groom each other, we bicker, we defend, we cuddle, we console, we beam with pride, and we beat ourselves up with shame based on our needs to connect socially and be appreciated by others.

Your emotions affect your communications. When people can't read you, they don't feel safe to share what is on their mind or they become agitated for no apparent reason. If you are good at hiding your emotions, you create the experience of talking to a blank wall, which creates anger, frustration, or fear in others. If people sense you are angry, afraid, or disappointed, they may feel angry or afraid in response. Poker faces confuse more than calm others.

Additionally, nonpositive emotions can motivate productive behavior. They might trigger great change when channeled in positive directions. It is better to learn to recognize your emotions, so you can use them to explain your behavior and express your needs, and to channel your energy in a positive direction.

Put your nonpositive emotions to good use

Let's look at the light side of a few dark emotions. Keep in mind that your reactions to these emotions could be destructive. Other times these emotions serve a higher purpose.

Guilt - Stanford University researchers Rebecca Schaumberg and Francis Flynn found leaders who showed a tendency to feel guilt were rated as the best leaders on 360 degree-feedback assessments.¹ Guilt may motivate a desire to do well and make decisions beneficial for the group even if at a personal cost. The light side of guilt is compassion, care, and generosity.

Anger - You might use your anger to launch a big change in your life. Many great things have happened based on the power of, "Oh yeah, I'll show you." If the anger prompts you to speak up when uncomfortable, to take a step into the unknown, or to prove you can accomplish something you weren't sure you could, then anger is a force for good. The light side of anger is passion, courage, and determination.

Fear - When your brain senses a threat, your ability to focus is heightened. Many people say they work better under pressure. In truth, their creative capacity weakens, but they better block out distractions, hone in on the task at hand, and work faster. You should work this way in spurts so you don't burn out, but the light side of fear is focus, intensity, and alertness.

Disappointment - When you don't get what you expect from your work, people, and even yourself, you might feel angry and disappointed. What didn't you get that you really wanted, or that you thought was promised to you? What did you hope or dream for? What are you not getting from the situation that you need, such as respect, achievement, or autonomy? When you discover what you expected to get, you might ask for what you need. If you realize your dream won't come true as you had hoped, you might allow yourself a few days to grieve the loss so you can then move on. The light side of disappointment is the ability to accept what is and then move through suffering to freedom or discern what you need to ask for to move forward.

Boredom - Boredom can reflect a lack of challenge, meaning you need more to stimulate your mind. Sometimes it's good to peacefully do nothing for short spurts so your brain has a recovery break. Other times, boredom can be a sign you are not fully utilizing your strengths. When researching my book, Wander Woman, I found many people feel a soulful agitation that can lead them to accomplishing great things. When you feel bored, try to envision your desired future instead of allowing yourself to be distracted by what is in front of you. Consider talking to a coach or good friend who supports your journey to help define the world you are seeking to create for yourself. Your bouts of boredom and restlessness may not end, but at least you have a vision or purpose to pursue as you wander. The light side of boredom can be found when you are prompted to take on new challenges, explore what makes work meaningful, and make decisions that serve your strengths and dreams.

Take time every day to pause and ask yourself how you are feeling and what you need to do differently, if anything. If you are stuck, seek help to uncover the source. Then you may be able to determine how you can channel what you feel to a positive outcome.

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Wherever I teach in the world, I find people were raised to show only good emotions and hide the others. We were told that good leaders, good friends, and good parents show optimism, enthusiasm, compassion, pride, and a good sense of humor.

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A person’s condition with regard to their psychological and emotional well-being.

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Most people believe that mental disorders are rare and "happen to someone else." In fact, mental disorders are common and widespread. An estimated 54 million Americans suffer from some form of mental disorder in a given year.

Most families are not prepared to cope with learning their loved one has a mental illness. It can be physically and emotionally trying, and can make us feel vulnerable to the opinions and judgments of others.

If you think you or someone you know may have a mental or emotional problem, it is important to remember there is hope and help.
What is mental illness?
A mental illness is a disease that causes mild to severe disturbances in thought and/or behavior, resulting in an inability to cope with life's ordinary demands and routines.

There are more than 200 classified forms of mental illness. Some of the more common disorders are depression, bipolar disorder, dementia, schizophrenia and anxiety disorders. Symptoms may include changes in mood, personality, personal habits and/or social withdrawal.

Mental health problems may be related to excessive stress due to a particular situation or series of events. As with cancer, diabetes and heart disease, mental illnesses are often physical as well as emotional and psychological. Mental illnesses may be caused by a reaction to environmental stresses, genetic factors, biochemical imbalances, or a combination of these. With proper care and treatment many individuals learn to cope or recover from a mental illness or emotional disorder.

To hear personal descriptions of mental illness visit http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/feelslike

Warning Signs and Symptoms

To learn more about symptoms that are specific to a particular mental illness, search under Mental Health Information or refer to the Mental Health America brochure on that illness. The following are signs that your loved one may want to speak to a medical or mental health professional.

It is especially important to pay attention to sudden changes in thoughts and behaviors. Also keep in mind that the onset of several of the symptoms below, and not just any one change, indicates a problem that should be assessed. The symptoms below should not be due to recent substance use or another medical condition.

If you or someone you know is in crisis now, seek help immediately. Call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) to reach a 24 hour crisis center or dial 911 for immediate assistance.
In Adults, Young Adults and Adolescents:

Prolonged depression (sadness or irritability)

Feelings of extreme highs and lows

Excessive fears, worries and anxieties

Dramatic changes in eating or sleeping habits

Strange thoughts (delusions)

Seeing or hearing things that aren't there (hallucinations)

Growing inability to cope with daily problems and activities

Numerous unexplained physical ailments

In Older Children and Pre-Adolescents:

Inability to cope with problems and daily activities

Changes in sleeping and/or eating habits

Excessive complaints of physical ailments

Changes in ability to manage responsibilities - at home and/or at school

Defiance of authority, truancy, theft, and/or vandalism

Prolonged negative mood, often accompanied by poor appetite or thoughts of death

Frequent outbursts of anger

In Younger Children:

Changes in school performance

Poor grades despite strong efforts

Changes in sleeping and/or eating habits

Excessive worry or anxiety (i.e. refusing to go to bed or school)

Persistent disobedience or aggression

How to cope day-to-day
Accept your feelings
Despite the different symptoms and types of mental illnesses, many families who have a loved one with mental illness, share similar experiences. You may find yourself denying the warning signs, worrying what other people will think because of the stigma, or wondering what caused your loved one to become ill. Accept that these feelings are normal and common among families going through similar situations. Find out all you can about your loved one's illness by reading and talking with mental health professionals. Share what you have learned with others.
Handling unusual behavior
The outward signs of a mental illness are often behavioral. A person may be extremely quiet or withdrawn. Conversely, he or she may burst into tears, have great anxiety or have outbursts of anger.

Even after treatment has started, some individuals with a mental illness can exhibit anti-social behaviors. When in public, these behaviors can be disruptive and difficult to accept. The next time you and your family member visit your doctor or mental health professional, discuss these behaviors and develop a strategy for coping.

Your family member's behavior may be as dismaying to them as it is to you. Ask questions, listen with an open mind and be there to support them.
Establishing a support network
Whenever possible, seek support from friends and family members. If you feel you cannot discuss your situation with friends or other family members, find a self-help or support group. These groups provide an opportunity for you to talk to other people who are experiencing the same type of problems. They can listen and offer valuable advice.
Seeking counseling
Therapy can be beneficial for both the individual with mental illness and other family members. A mental health professional can suggest ways to cope and better understand your loved one's illness.

When looking for a therapist, be patient and talk to a few professionals so you can choose the person that is right for you and your family. It may take time until you are comfortable, but in the long run you will be glad you sought help.
Taking time out
It is common for the person with the mental illness to become the focus of family life. When this happens, other members of the family may feel ignored or resentful. Some may find it difficult to pursue their own interests.

If you are the caregiver, you need some time for yourself. Schedule time away to prevent becoming frustrated or angry. If you schedule time for yourself it will help you to keep things in perspective and you may have more patience and compassion for coping or helping your loved one. Being physically and emotionally healthy helps you to help others.
"Many families who have a loved one with mental illness share similar experiences"
It is important to remember that there is hope for recovery and that with treatment many people with mental illness return to a productive and fulfilling life.

Other Resources

Mental Illness in the Family: Part 1 Recognizing the Warning Signs & How to Cope is one in a series of pamphlets on helping family members with mental illness. Other Mental Health America titles include:

Mental Health America offers additional pamphlets on a variety of mental health topics. For more information or to order multiple copies of pamphlets, please contact Mental Health America

External Resources

Find a Local MHA Affiliate

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administraton (SAMHSA)
Phone 800-789-2647

National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH)
Information Resources and Inquiries Branch
Phone 301-443-4513

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Mental Illness and the Family: Recognizing Warning Signs and How to Cope

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Most people believe that mental disorders are rare and "happen to someone else." In fact, mental disorders are common and widespread. An estimated 54 million Americans suffer from some form of mental disorder in a given year. Most families are not prepared to cope with learning their loved one has a mental illness.

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What message is society telling us about mental illness?

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What message is society telling us about mental illness?

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Changing The Way Society Understands Mental Health
Come see Theo Bennett speak at the 2015 NAMI National Convention in San Francisco during the Opening Session on Tuesday, July 7.
It's no secret that mental health is routinely treated differently than physical health, but sometimes it's difficult to understand how or why this affects us. This disparity can take many shapes and forms, ranging from negative societal perceptions to discrimination in health coverage for mental health. Consequently, this unequal treatment of mental and physical illnesses leads to unequal results.

If we don't recognize mental illnesses as physical health issues, then we will never get people the treatment that they need. One of the few certainties that I have learned from living with a father with bipolar disorder is that mental health is just as important as physical health. In fact, mental health is physical health; the two are inseparable. It baffles me that many people continue to make a distinction between the two.

In an effort to better understand the subtlety of mental illness, I have sought out opportunities that have changed both my life and my perception of mental illness. I went from reading articles online in my free time to doing hands-on research about the physiological development of mental illness at Dr. Renee Reijo-Pera's Stem Cell Institute and the Center for Mental Health Research and Recovery at Montana State University.

While our current generation of medication and treatment can be frustrating at times, I have seen how learning more about the underlying biochemical pathways holds great promises for the future. My journey has also become an adventure all across the nation advocating for a more humanistic perspective of mental health. The ability to speak up and share what I've discovered with people and the chance to connect with others in similar experiences have been some of the most fulfilling experiences in my life.

Ironically, the same fluidity and complexity of mental disorders that I find so fascinating has prevented those same disorders from gaining societal acceptance in the same way that physical illnesses have. They are just as real, but they are sometimes more difficult to understand. The social stigma that those living with mental illness experience essentially stems from this fundamental lack of understanding of mental disorders as physical illnesses. This is what makes living with mental illness so hard and is something that we all need to recognize to a greater extent, myself included.

Initially, I dismissed my father's illness as simple craziness. In a manic state my dad hallucinated that he was dealing cards with Christ's apostles and during his crippling depression he couldn't lift himself from his bed for weeks. Even though my dad's physical reality didn't match my own, it was naive to ignore the fact that there are people behind these diseases, and that their illnesses don't encapsulate their personalities. If I dismiss you as crazy, then how can we start a dialogue? We need to begin by empathizing and loving those who we don't fully understand. Whether this takes the form of a quick post on social media or a late-night conversation with a loved one in desperate need of support, simply speak up. Speak out. Be heard. Show love. Listen well.

This change doesn't come easy. In fact, it was only through understanding the complexity of my father's mental illness that I gradually came to learn-through trauma, confusion, and grief-more about myself and the human condition than I had ever thought possible. My experiences with mental illness in my family challenged me to become a more compassionate and patient individual; through my father's precipitous highs and seemingly endless lows, our collective vulnerability created an incredibly strong emotional bond between us.

From my personal experiences, my biggest takeaway has been that a fundamental difference between mental progress and debilitation comes from understanding your current situation. The thoughts and worries we all experience are real and important regardless of whether our situation conforms to others' ideas of mental health. If we can accept our current state, then we can begin to move forward. Mental wellness is not a mind over matter issue-nobody claims it is-but it does involve a certain level of acceptance.

At the end of the day, however, I'm still a young, confused teenager trying to process what mental illness really means to me and my family. My greatest fear, however, is not that I am hopeless to change our society's perception of mental illness, nor that I can't adequately solve the world's disconnect between mental and physical health issues. Instead, I fear that we possess a voice and a power to effect change, and yet we fail to speak out and bond together as equals.

If nothing else, everyone reading this can simply increase their familiarization with those living with mental illness around them to broaden their spectrum of receptive comfort. Hearing the stories of others can widen our capacity for love if we only allow ourselves to learn from a wider variety of experiences. We have all been given a voice and the ability to listen, please use these gifts to start affecting the way we perceive mental health.
Theo Bennett is a freshman studying neuroscience at Brigham Young University. Although he barely knows what he's doing next weekend, he has always aspired to be a part of the much needed change in the American mental health care system.

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Changing The Way Society Understands Mental Health | NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness

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Come see Theo Bennett speak at the 2015 NAMI National Convention in San Francisco during the Opening Session on Tuesday, July 7. It's no secret that mental health is routinely treated differently than physical health, but sometimes it's difficult to understand how or why this affects us.

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What influences make me to feel the way I do?

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What influences make me to feel the way I do?

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The people around you, how they treat you, why they treat you that way.

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A few years ago, I wrote a book called 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do. I've received thousands of emails over the years from readers telling me which "thing" they struggled with the most. The struggle people seem to be able to relate to most, is number two-- mentally strong people don't give away their power.

It's something we all do sometimes. Maybe you let your co-worker's bad mood ruin your day. Or perhaps you let someone's criticism damage your self-image.

Any time you allow someone to have a negative influence over the way you think, feel, or behave, you give them power over your life. It will rob you of the mental strength you need to reach your greatest potential.

Sometimes, it's obvious when you give up your power. Losing your cool and doing something you regret is a prime example.

But it's also possible to give up your power in more subtle ways. You might not even realize you're doing it.

Here are 10 ways you might be giving away your personal power without even realizing t:

1. You give in to guilt trips.

If you change your behavior because someone tugs at your heart strings, you give that individual power over you. Speak up, stick to your word, and don't give in even when someone tries to play on your emotions.

2. You allow someone else's opinion of you to dictate your self-worth.

Some people won't like you and some people won't like your choices. You don't have to let their opinions affect how you feel about yourself, however. Feeling bad about yourself based on what someone says or how that person feels about you gives that person too much power over you.

3. You don't establish healthy boundaries.

You decide who to allow into your life. If you grow resentful of people who take up too much of your energy, it's a sign you aren't setting clear boundaries. Establish clear physical, emotional, and financial boundaries.

4. You complain about all the things you have to do.

You also get to choose what to do with your time. You aren't forced to go to work, see the doctor, or attend a family gathering. There will be consequences if you don't do some of those things, but they're still choices.

5. You hold grudges.

A grudge won't diminish the other person's life, but it can wreak havoc on your own. Holding on to anger from the past allows an individual to occupy space in your life. That's not to say you need to allow toxic people into your life--you shouldn't. Just don't waste your mental resources on them.

6. You change your goals because you were rejected.

Giving up after being rejected gives an individual the power to determine what you'll do with your life. Whether you got passed up for a promotion or turned down for a collaborative project, don't give up. Just because other people don't recognize your potential doesn't mean you can't succeed.

7. You set out to prove someone wrong.

When someone doubts you, it can be tempting to set out to prove them wrong. Make sure your purpose is about your desire to succeed, not about convincing people that you're more valuable than they gave you credit for.

8. You let other people bring out the worst in you.

You're going to run into people who have the ability to bring out the worst in you. These individuals may provoke you to say things you regret or pressure you to do things you wouldn't normally do. Stay true to your values and refuse to let others have a negative influence over you.

9. You invest time into talking about people that you don't like.

Every minute you spend thinking about someone you don't like, or complaining about someone you don't want to be around, is 60 more seconds you give that person. Dwelling on negative people allows them power over your mind.

10. You work hard to avoid criticism.

Feedback from others can be instrumental in helping you become your best. If you value other people's input too much, however, you may avoid doing anything that could lead to criticism. It's impossible to live your best life when you're focused on pleasing people.

How to Take Back Your Power

If you notice that you're giving away your power, you're not alone. Everyone does it sometimes. The good news is, it's never too late to start taking back your power.

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10 Ways You Might Be Giving Other People Too Much Power Over Your Life Without Even Realizing It

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A few years ago, I wrote a book called 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do . I've received thousands of emails over the years from readers telling me which "thing" they struggled with the most. The struggle people seem to be able to relate to most, is number two-- mentally strong people don't give away their power.