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This is a fantastic resource - you can book one-to-one sessions for support, attend group sessions and find brilliant resources on "why" this happens.

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"We were limited to where we could go because of his behaviour. He would accuse me of lying to him. He would wear me down and he would tell lies about me. If I asked him to brush his teeth, one day it would be ok, the next he would swear at me and refuse. He would spit at me, he punched holes in doors"

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Capa First Response | You are not alone - Capa First Response

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We support families and professionals impacted by child or adolescent on parent abuse.

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Hampshire and IOW Healthcare NHS Foundation Trust

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A guide for parents and carers

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ARFID - An introduction for Parents and Carers

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ARFID - An introduction for Parents and Carers

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Hampshire and IOW Healthcare NHS Foundation Trust

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CAMHS - Supporting a child with eating difficulties

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Hampshire and IOW Healthcare NHS Foundation Trust

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End Furniture Poverty does not provide furniture or grants for furniture and white goods, we are here to direct you to the right source of support for you.

If you are on a low-income and unable to afford furniture and white goods, there are a number of ways in which you can get help. Carefully read through the options and consider speaking to your local Citizens Advice to help you to submit applications.

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Get help with furniture - End Furniture Poverty

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Help finding furniture for families, individuals and support workers - please note we do not provide furniture ourselves.

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Find out what support is available to help with the cost of living. This includes income and disability benefits, bills and allowances, childcare, housing and travel.

Check benefits and financial support you can get

Answer a few questions to find out what support you might be able to get to help with living costs if you live in the UK. Check benefits and financial support you can get.

Scams

You may get calls, emails or messages that are pretending to be from a government service or an energy bill support scheme. If you get a message asking for your personal details (for example, bank details or passwords) this could be a scam. Report anything you think is suspicious.

Support available in England

This guide covers cost of living support available in England.

Support with income

Find out what support is available to help increase your income. This includes the Cost of Living Payment, Universal Credit and Carer's Allowance.

Support with bills and costs

Find out what support is available to help with bills and costs. This includes support with utility bills, support from your local council and Council Tax Reduction.

If you're 60 or over

Find out what support is available if you're 60 or over. This includes Pension Credit, discounted travel and how to check your State Pension.

If you're disabled or have a health condition

Find out what support is available if you're disabled or have a health condition. This includes disability benefits, the Disability Cost of Living Payment and support with prescriptions and health costs.

Childcare and maternity costs

Find out what support is available with childcare and maternity costs. This includes free childcare hours and free school meals.

Managing money

Find advice for managing money, including budgeting advice and debt support.

If you're finding things difficult

Find support if money worries are impacting your mental health or you're affected by domestic abuse.

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Find out what support is available to help with the cost of living: income and disability benefits, bills and allowances, childcare, housing and travel.

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Your child may be able to get free school meals if you get any of the following:

Income Support

income-based Jobseeker's Allowance

income-related Employment and Support Allowance

support under Part VI of the Immigration and Asylum Act 1999

the guaranteed element of Pension Credit

Child Tax Credit (provided you're not also entitled to Working Tax Credit and have an annual gross income of no more than £16,190)

Working Tax Credit run-on - paid for 4 weeks after you stop qualifying for Working Tax Credit

Universal Credit - if you apply on or after 1 April 2018 your household income must be less than £7,400 a year (after tax and not including any benefits you get)

Children who get paid these benefits directly, instead of through a parent or guardian, can also get free school meals.

Your child may also get free school meals if you get any of these benefits and your child is both:

If you do not qualify for most benefits (also known as having 'no recourse to public funds'), your child may still be eligible for free school meals. Ask their school or local authority whether they're eligible.

Infant free school meals in England

Your child will be able to get free school meals if they're in a government-funded school and in:

Tell your local authority if you also get any of the qualifying benefits. Your child's school can get extra funding if you do.

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Check if your child can get free school meals - and find out how to apply on your local authority's website.

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Childcare choices

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We provide practical support to people during their hardest moments and work with our community of food banks, partners, volunteers, and supporters to ensure no one needs a food bank to survive.

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Government guidance on getting an extra payment to help with the cost of living if you're entitled to certain benefits or tax credits

The Government have extended their Help to Save scheme for low earners until April 2025. The scheme offers a 50% bonus payment worth up to £1,200 over four years.

See information below for local and national support and advice relating to specific topics.

If you can't afford to buy enough food, you may be able to get some short-term help from your local Members make a small weekly contribution and receive food with a higher value than the same items would cost elsewhere.food bank. You will need a voucher to use a food bank. To find out where you can get a voucher, contact your local food bank or phone the Citizens Advice national phone service on 03444 111 444.

Community pantries provide groceries at a lower rate than shops and supermarkets. Access to the Community pantry is through membership.

Find your local food bank or community pantry

The Smart Living website has tips and ideas for making the most of the food you have and avoiding waste.

The BBC has a range of healthy recipes to help you Eat Well for Lessas well as £1 Mealsto help you prepare tasty, hot meals on a budget.

Debt and budgeting

The organisations below offer free, impartial advice on debt and budgeting:

Breathing space is a new government scheme which is designed to give you time to receive debt advice and find a solution to sort out your debt problems. Eligibility criteria apply.

Always make sure you are claiming any benefits you may be entitled to.

Gamcare offers support and advice to those affected by gambling, including specific advice regarding money management.

Economic abuse often occurs alongside other forms of abuse. Surviving Economic Abuse has information and advice as well as a Financial Support Line for victims of domestic abuse.

The NHS has practical advice on coping with financial worries.

Mind has practical tips on managing your money and improving your mental health

Money Savings Expert, supported by Mind, Rethink, CAPUK and others, have developed a guide - Mental Health and Debt - for people with mental health problems and those caring for them.

Mental Health and Money Advice has practical advice and support for people experiencing issues with mental health and money.

If you are receiving mental health crisis treatment and struggling with problem debt, the Mental Health Crisis Breathing Space scheme has been set up to create time and space for you to get the treatment you need, without having to worry about your debts growing or your creditors contacting you during your treatment. (Hampshire County Council residents can submit a referral form here).

If you need support with your mental health and wellbeing, there are many local and national organisations and helplines. See our Mental health information page.

If you are struggling to keep your home warm, and live in the Hampshire County Council area, visit the Hitting the Cold Spots web page or call the advice line on 0800 804 8601. The friendly Hampshire-based team will be able to provide a range of advice and assistance including one-off emergency fuel vouchers for pre-payment meters for people who meet certain eligibility criteria.

See information from Switched on Portsmouthabout help available for Portsmouth, Havant and Gosport residents. (See also SwitchedOnGosport)

See our keeping warm in winter section for more advice, energy saving tips and details of financial assistance that may be available.

If you are having problems paying your rent or are worried about mortgage or council tax payments:

Keeping your home warm in winter.
If you claim benefits, you may be able to claim discounts or grants to help heat your home. More about keeping warm in winter.

If you can't afford to replace something which is broken, or to pay for costly repairs, you could try visiting a Repair Cafe.

Repair Cafés are free meeting places and they're all about repairing things (together). In the place where a Repair Café is located, you'll find tools and materials to help you make any repairs you need. On clothes, furniture, electrical appliances, bicycles, crockery, appliances, toys, et cetera. You'll also find expert volunteers, with repair skills in all kinds of fields.

Find your local Repair Cafe
Further information from Ofcom.
The Department for Work and Pensions provides grants and short-term advances for people who already claim benefits, such as:

You can check you are receiving the right benefits:

Tax Help for Older People is a service from the charity Tax Volunteers providing free, independent and expert help and advice for older people on lower incomes who cannot afford to pay for professional tax advice.

Use the internet to search for reuse organisations that may sell secondhand furniture and appliances.
Here are some websites or organisations you could try:

Gumtree - for secondhand furniture and appliances for sale.
Emmaus Hampshire is a social enterprise which helps people out of homelessness.
The Community Furniture Project in Basingstoke sells a wide range of used furniture.
The Furniture Helpline in Alton provides affordable household goods, household furniture and white-goods at very low prices to those with a need.
Jacob's Well Care Centre aims to provide furniture to those in need in the Gosport area.
Search the Community Directory to find organisations that can help with furniture.

Charity shops, such as the British Heart Foundation,are also a good place to start if you want to buy secondhand goods for the home at affordable prices.
Some household waste recycling centres have sections where you can buy secondhand furniture.

Some charities provide financial help such as grants or subsidised care in a care home. Often these charities are concerned with particular groups or occupations.

Use the Search for Grants tool on Turn2Us to find out what charitable funds you may be eligible for.

The Simple Payment Plan was created for those in financial difficulty and who meet certain eligibility criteria.

Qualifying customers can choose from either a fortnightly or monthly payment plan that spreads the cost of a TV Licence over 12 months. This means you make smaller payments more frequently. The Simple Payment Plan offers flexibility if a payment is missed, as it can be spread across the remainder of the plan instead of having to pay double the amount next time. If payments are missed three months in a row, customers are removed from the Simple Payment Plan.

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Connect to Support Hampshire is an online information and advice guide and directory of services for adults with care and support needs who live in Hampshire.

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We are a baby bank located in Romsey providing new and pre-loved items to families in need. Our aim is to alleviate child poverty and promote the reuse of items through the simple act of redistribution.

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Turn2us is a national charity offering information and practical support to people facing financial insecurity. We help people gain access to welfare benefits, charitable grants and other support - online, by phone and face to face through our work in communities and the organisations we partner with.

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Debt advice | Free debt advice | National Debtline | National Debtline

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National Debtline is a debt advice service run by the Money Advice Trust. The Money Advice Trust is a registered charity: no. 1099506. A company limited by guarantee Registered in England and Wales: no. 4741583.

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CMA Connect, Fareham - St John’s Church Hall 5A Upper St Michael’s Grove Fareham PO14 1DN

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Free Debt Advice & Support | Debt Advice Line UK

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Struggling with debt? Get free, confidential advice from the Debt Advice Line UK. Fill out our quick form to get expert solutions, manage your debts, and regain financial control. Start today for tailored support.

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Debt Management Plans. Get A Fee-Free DMP From StepChange

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StepChange provides free debt management plans. Find out whether you’re eligible for a plan and how you can get one with the UK’s leading debt charity.

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Struggling with debt or worried about money? At CAP we offer free, confidential debt help, budgeting support and advice through local UK based churches.

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Budget Planner | Free online budget planning tool | MoneyHelper

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Discover our free online MoneyHelper Budget Planner calculator to gain a better understanding of your money coming in and out, and how to improve your finances.

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Our Storehouse provides good quality clothing, equipment, toys and food to individuals and families in need. Over 40 local agencies partner with us through a referral scheme to make this possible.

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£15 of food costs £5

Monday, Wednesdays, Fridays 9.30-12pm

Tuesdays 4pm-6pm

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Mental health training and consultancy is just one of the ways we are changing the experience of people living with poor mental health across the UK. By educating workplaces, we can create an open culture and break the stigma.

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Mental Health UK works across England, Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland to support people affected by mental health problems.

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National charity helping people with Anxiety - Anxiety UK

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Become a Member of Anxiety UK. We pride ourselves on being user led, with many on our staff and volunteer team having personal experience of anxiety.

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Essential support for under 25s

The Mix is the UK's leading support service for young people. We are here to help you take on any challenge you're facing - from mental health to money, from homelessness to finding a job, from break-ups to drugs. Talk to us via our online community, on social, through our free, confidential helpline or our counselling service.

Featured

The Mix. Registered charity number: 1048995

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Welcome to The Mix, offering essential support for under 25s.

Log in to submit your own content on our platform Your Voices.

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Welcome to The Mix, the online guide to life for young people in the UK.

Your Voices is a community-focused section of The Mix where you can share stories about your experiences on a specific issue. Upload your own videos, images, blog posts, and playlists to Your Voices and share them with your friends.

Don't have a Your Voices account? Sign up here to submit your own content.

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The Mix - Essential support for under 25s

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The Mix: 0808 808 4994 - Free information and support for under 25s in the UK. Get advice about sex, relationships, drugs, mental health, money & jobs.

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No Limits Advice Centre

No Limits Advice Centre

Given the continuing advice from the government for social distancing, we have made the difficult decision to close the Advice Centre to protect young people and our staff. This includes the DASH service and the Space 4 U service in Southampton and on the Isle of Wight.

Read more

We're still here if you need us

We're still here if you need us

We know this is a challenging time for many children and young people and we're still here to support you. You can call 02380 224224, email [email protected] or talk to a member of our team via our online web chat during our normal opening hours. Click here for the latest information on our services.

Find out more

Get Help

Get Help

No matter what's worrying you, we're here to help. All our staff are friendly and won't judge you or tell you what to do. We'll help you to make choices that are right for you.

Find out more

Tom's Story

Tom's Story

Tom was referred for counselling by his parents. He had a sister with disabilities and a recent diagnosis had a huge impact on the family. He was also very stressed with his school work. Counselling helped Tom lean some coping strategies and provide tools for managing stressful situations.

"The service was very kind and understanding. I felt I had support and someone to speak to and trust."

Find out more

About No Limits

No Limits is a charity offering free and confidential information, advice, counselling, advocacy and support to children and young people under the age of 26 in Southampton and Hampshire. Young people can come to No Limits for free support on a wide range of issues including housing, homelessness, debt, employment, relationships, sexual health, mental health and substance misuse. Support is offered at the No Limits Advice Centre in Central Southampton and through outreach work delivered in schools and colleges across Hampshire.

Find out more

We've helped

7,095

young people supported by No Limits this year

2,865

young people offered counselling

2,117

children and young people visited our Advice Centre

I've been coming here for over 2 years nearly and throughout all my issues with my partner No Limits has helped me so much, even through my prison sentence and now I'm finally sorting my life out they still don't hesitate to always help me. No Limits is 100% LEGEND

Nick

Latest News

We're still here if you need us

No Limits are still here to provide advice and support. If you are a child, young person or parent and you need support from a member of our team, you can phone 02380 224 224 or email [email protected]

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Given the continuing advice from the government for social distancing, we have made the difficult decision to close the Advice Centre to protect young people and our staff. This includes the DASH service and the Space 4 U service in Southampton and on the Isle of Wight.

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Hampshire Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS) are an NHS service that aims to help young people up to the age of 18 who are finding it…

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Support & recovery programmes for anxiety based disorders

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Mental health support in South London for young people (aged 14-35) struggling with unusual experiences, such as hearing voices or feeling paranoid.

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Voice Collective and the ACAMH 2022 Awards

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Supporting young people who hear, see, or sense things that others don’t.

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Some Law firms offer 30min free advice surrounding the legalities of parenting, including Court Orders

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About Find a Solicitor

Run by the Law Society, Find a Solicitor is a free service for anyone looking for information about organisations or people providing legal services in England and Wales that are regulated by the Solicitors Regulation Authority (SRA). Find a Solicitor takes data held by the SRA, which we adapt and add additional information to, and present through an easy-to-use search. While we try to ensure the accuracy of the information, the Law Society cannot accept any liability arising from your reliance upon it, or from the inclusion in it or omission from it of any data whatsoever.

Learn more about Find a Solicitor 

Law Society member support

If you need to amend any information about you on Find a Solicitor or wish to give other feedback about the website, please call 020 7320 5757 (Monday to Friday from 09:00 to 17:00 charged at local call rates) or email us.

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Run by the Law Society, Find a Solicitor is a free service for anyone looking for information about organisations or people providing legal services in England and Wales that are regulated by the Solicitors Regulation Authority (SRA). Find a Solicitor takes data held by the SRA, which we adapt and add additional information to, and present through an easy-to-use search.

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Email: Our email advice service is to provide clarifying questions or for initial legal advice. Email advice relating to education law Email advice relating to family law Callback service: You can book a callback from a member of our legal team, which is a paid-for service.

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We work with parents whose children are in need, at risk or are in the care system & with kinship carers who are raising children unable to remain at home.

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Family mediation helps you make arrangements for children, money & property following separation, and is available online. Find an FMC Registered Mediator.

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Guidance and resources on children and family law issues, including relationship breakdown and children in the context of divorce or separation, plus children in public law and cross-border disputes.

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Cafcass advises the family courts about the welfare of children and what is in their best interests

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Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service

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Support Group for Men - meet every Monday at 7pm in Eastleigh

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Use our map to find your nearest ANDYSMANCLUB group. All our clubs meet on Mondays at 7pm and any man over 18 can attend.

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Beat provides Helplines offering support and information about eating disorders no matter where you are in your journey.

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We support main carers of children and young people, as well as parents. You might be a kinship carer, legal guardian, foster carer, grandparent or sibling. If you are the child or young person's main carer, we want to support you. Our advisers are trained and experienced in supporting carers as well as parents.

If you are a family member or friend, but you are not the child or young person's main carer, see our online information for advice around how you can support them. You can also encourage their parent or main carer to contact us.

If you are a professional looking for information about supporting the young people you work with, see our resources for professionals.

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Parents Helpline | Mental Health Help for Your Child

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The YoungMinds Parents Helpline, Webchat and Email provide support and help for parents and carers worried about their child's mental health and wellbeing.

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"I was a bit scared of attending my first class, but I needn't have worried. Everyone was in a similar situation and very welcoming. I have gone from a sad, lonely widow with little hope for a life, to an outgoing sociable person who decided it was time for me to concentrate on myself. I will always support and recommend anyone in a similar need to contact Solent Mind."

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Solent Mind | Hampshire's leading mental health charity

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"I was a bit scared of attending my first class, but I needn't have worried. Everyone was in a similar situation and very welcoming. I have gone from a sad, lonely widow with little hope for a life, to an outgoing sociable person who decided it was time for me to concentrate on myself.

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We support LGBT+ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans and those questioning their sexual or gender identity) children, young people and their families in the UK.

All of our services strive to be safe and inclusive spaces for LGBT+ young people.

We provide direct support to LGBT+ children and young people around their gender and sexual identities. We also work with parents, carers and families.

Through our Positive Identities service we offer training to schools, professionals and community groups. Our training raises awareness of LGBT+ lives, promotes inclusion and tackles homophobic, biphobic and transphobic bullying.

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How we provide direct support to LGBT+ children and young people around their gender and sexual identities.

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The Mix - Essential support for under 25s

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The Mix: 0808 808 4994 - Free information and support for under 25s in the UK. Get advice about sex, relationships, drugs, mental health, money & jobs.

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Where to get urgent help for mental health - NHS

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Where to get urgent help for mental health - NHS

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you are not able to speak to your local NHS urgent mental health helpline

you need help urgently for your mental health, but it's not an emergency

you're not sure what to do

111 will tell you the right place to get help if you need to see someone.

You may be able to speak to a nurse, or mental health nurse, over the phone.

A GP can advise you about helpful treatments and also help you access mental health services. You may be able to refer yourself to some services.

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Where to get urgent help for mental health

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You may need urgent help for mental health for many different reasons. Some people call it a crisis, an emergency or a breakdown. It's important to know that support is available, whatever you're going through.

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Anxiety is a word we use to describe feelings of worry, fear and panic. As well as these emotional feelings, people with anxiety might also experience physical (body) sensations such as a racing heart, breathing fast, sweaty hands, dry mouth and feeling shaky. Many people also have "what if" or negative thoughts when they are anxious.

Anxiety is a normal human response to feeling threatened or in danger, even if that threat or danger is a thought, image or memory. We all experience anxiety from time to time. Anxiety can become a real problem if the thoughts, emotions (feelings) and physical sensations are very strong, happen even when there is no real danger or if it lasts for a long time.

Lots of people experience worry and anxiety although for some people it can impact on everyday life and get in the way of school/college, socialising and even home life. The types of anxiety that are most common but cause a lot of distress include:

Worries about what other people think of you or worries about being judged negatively and not feeling good enough

Worries about bad things happening to you or the people you love and care about

Uncontrollable constant worry about lots of things (like school, the future, health, world events)

Worries about your safety and health (including worries about germs and contamination)

Phobias (big fears) about specific things

Worries that you are responsible for bad things happening

Feeling the need to complete certain routines, rituals or behaviour to stop bad things from happening (commonly known as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)

If anxiety has become a problem for you, there is lots you can do to manage and cope.

Check out the 'what to do' workbooks which young people and families can use and can be downloaded from this page. These provide information and practical strategies to help you manage. It's important to remember we can't get rid of anxiety (or any other emotion) but we can learn how to cope and manage with it.

Worries and anxiety are common; everyone worries so it's important to remember you are not alone. Some worries may seem very real and very scary. Tell someone how you are feeling no matter what your worries are, even if you are worried about doing so. There will be someone who will listen and try to support you.

Although anxiety feels horrible, remember these feelings will pass and the physical sensations cannot harm you. Remind yourself that you have been anxious before, that those feelings passed, that you coped and were ok. If you need to, use activities, such as watching TV, spending time with friends, reading, making things and listening to music, to help manage until you feel a bit better.

You cannot avoid all the things that make you feel anxious so face your FEARs with confidence following these four steps;

Focus - rather than worry about the past, future or the unknown, focus on the present moment, the here and now

Expose - the more you face your fears the easier it will become to manage

Approach - the fear of experiencing anxiety is often worse than the situation you are avoiding. Face your fear and see for yourself that the situation probably isn't as bad as you are predicting

Rehearse - practice anxiety management techniques.

You can find lots of these on the Youth Anxiety website.

Struggling with Anxiety? Try on a new perspective - credit AnxietyBC

What Not to Say to someone with Anxiety

Guided Mindfulness: Passing Clouds - Dr Natalie Roberts

Guided Mindfulness: Leaves on a Stream

Introduction to Mindfulness

Mindful Breathing

Mindfulness for Emotions

Mindfulness Values Exercise

Mindfulness Body Scan

Struggling with Anxiety? Try on a new perspective - credit AnxietyBC

What Not to Say to someone with Anxiety

Guided Mindfulness: Passing Clouds - Dr Natalie Roberts

Guided Mindfulness: Leaves on a Stream

Introduction to Mindfulness

Mindful Breathing

Mindfulness for Emotions

Mindfulness Values Exercise

Mindfulness Body Scan

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Free anger management games for kids and teens

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The Red Beast: Controlling Anger in Children with Asperger’s Syndrome (K.I. Al-Ghani children’s colour story books)

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This vibrant, illustrated book offers an accessible, fun way to discuss anger management for kids with Asperger’s, including tips on taming the “red beast” within.

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Anger is a normal and healthy reaction when things don't go the way we expected, life feels unfair or people upset or hurt us. It can be a helpful thing - letting us know that something is wrong or not okay with us.

It's normal for children and young people to find it difficult to manage their angry feelings sometimes, and it's helpful to remember that the part of our brain that helps us do this doesn't fully develop until we're in our mid-20s.

Anger can become a problem for your child if it feels overwhelming or unmanageable, makes them unhappy, affects their relationships or is expressed through unhelpful or destructive behaviours - towards either themselves or other people.

Angry feelings and aggressive behaviour can be really hard to deal with as a parent, and can have a huge effect on family life. If you're going through this, remember that there is light at the end of the tunnel. There are things you can do to make the situation better, and places where you can find support if you need to. Here, we've got strategies you can use to help you respond and advice on when to seek further help and where to get it.

When I'm angry I feel a lot of self-hate and worthlessness. I also feel a build-up of energy.

What is anger like for young people?

Three clouds expressing different emotions. The first cloud is throwing punches outwardly (Outward aggression). The second cloud is throwing punches towards itself (Inward aggression). The third cloud is displaying a dull-like expression while surrounded by lightning bolts (Passive aggression).

If your child can't tell you in words, they will often use their behaviour to let you know how they're feeling. A young person who is feeling angry may:

be outwardly aggressive - acting aggressively towards other people, including shouting, hitting or breaking things

be inwardly aggressive - hurting themselves, for example by self-harming, or being very self-critical

be passively aggressive - withdrawing, ignoring people, being sarcastic or sulking

feel things in their body like a racing heart, feeling hot or tensing their muscles - for example clenching their fists

seem tense, unable to relax or easily irritated

find it difficult to concentrate.

An iceberg submerged in water, with the text 'When we seem angry or aggressive, there are often other feelings hidden under the surface'. The words Angry and Aggressive are displayed on the section of the iceberg above the water, and the words Worried, Hurt, Scared, Lonely, Stressed, Overwhelmed, Ashamed, Ignored, Sad are displayed on the iceberg below the water.

Underneath these behaviours, a young person who seems very angry may also be feeling things like fear, stress, sadness, hurt or worry - or might be struggling to cope with a difficult experience at school, at home or in another part of their life that they feel unable to talk about.

It can be helpful to remember that a person who's feeling angry a lot of the time probably isn't feeling very happy - and while it might not be obvious, what they often need is support. Supporting children and young people to put their feelings into words can help them to feel less overwhelming, making it less likely that they will need to act out.

For some young people, feeling more irritable or angrier than usual can be a sign that they are struggling with low mood, depression or anxiety - especially if it goes on for a long period of time without changing.

A young person describes what anger's like for them.

How can I respond to my child in the moment when they get angry?

How can I help my child manage angry feelings positively?

In a calm moment, try to explore what's making them angry, focusing on letting them talk and listening to what it's like for them. Trust your instincts about picking the right moment, and remember that you know your child better than most people.

You can find more tips on our guide to starting a conversation with your child.

It might help to text, write a letter, go for a walk together or do an activity while you're talking to help them relax. You could also try spending five or ten minutes checking in with them each evening to encourage them to open up.

Recognising the triggers and patterns that alert them to the fact that they're getting angry can help them to take action before it becomes overwhelming. Keeping a diary or journal may make it easier for both of you to think this through - and apps such as ThinkNinja (for 10-18-year-olds) and HeadSpace can help them to track their feelings. This video by Braive might also help you to understand how stress and overwhelming feelings can build up in a person's life.

Some young people will find relaxing techniques useful. This could be things like:

meditating

listening to music

colouring or drawing

taking deep breaths or doing a breathing technique

Teenagers might like to do this using a mindfulness or meditation app such as Headspace or Calm. Often, people who are feeling angry breathe in more than they breathe out - so a good trick is to focus on breathing out for a few counts longer than they breath in, which can help their body to relax.

Some young people will find active techniques useful. This could be things like:

punching a pillow

throwing a ball

ripping or screwing up newspaper

playing sport

running or going for a walk

Young people tell us it helps to:

think of the bigger picture: will this bother me in a year?

try and say why you're angry, and remember that time alone to calm yourself down is okay.

take some time to think about how your actions are affecting others, and try to remember people are usually trying to help you.

apologise if you have harmed someone - and if you have hurt yourself, apologise to yourself.

figure out why you reacted like that so you can recognise it next time before it's too late.

tell someone if they've made you angry, or talk to someone else about it.

remind yourself that the emotion is valid.

Our Parents Helpline team share advice on how to respond to anger.

Where can I find professional help?

It's a good idea to seek professional advice if:

your child's anger is consistently affecting their day-to-day life, wellbeing, mental health, relationships or experience at home or school - or the day-to-day life of your family.

you've tried strategies for at least four weeks and nothing seems to work, or their outbursts of anger feel unmanageable and last for a long time.

they are expressing their anger through destructive behaviours towards themselves or others - including self-harm or physically hurting other people.

There are different places where you can find help for your child. Your GP, your child's school and considering whether counselling or therapy might help are good places to start.

Your GP can discuss your concerns with you and, if needed, refer your child for more support - including Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS).

Sometimes, challenging or aggressive behaviour can be a sign of an additional need or developmental difficulty, such as autism or difficulties hearing or speaking, which your child may need specialist help with. If you think this could be the case, speak to your GP or your child's school to discuss whether they need a referral for an assessment.

You can find out more about speaking to GPs, finding a counsellor or therapist, accessing CAMHS, getting help from your child's school and finding local services on our guide to getting help for your child.

If your child becomes so angry that they are being verbally or physically aggressive and you feel unsafe, it's important that you reach out for help.

In these situations:

If it is safe for you and your child, remove yourself and any other family members from the situation.

If it's not safe to do so, and you feel that you or anyone else are at immediate risk of harm, warn your child that if the aggression does not stop you will contact the police.

Follow through if they do not stop. Call 999 if there is a danger to life or violence is being used or threatened. Call 101 if you want to discuss the situation with your local police officer.

Calling the police to intervene in a situation that involves your child is an incredibly difficult thing for any parent to have to do. However, this may be the only course of action if your safety, or the safety of other family members, is in question. You might feel worried about getting your child into trouble, but they won't automatically get a criminal record and it's important to put your safety first. The police can be supportive about responding to mental health issues and may be able to advise you about next steps.

Looking after yourself as a parent

As a parent or carer, we often put our children first, no matter how old they are - but it's so important that you remember to look after yourself too. If you have ever flown on a plane you may remember the flight attendant saying that in times of difficulty you need to put your own oxygen mask on before helping others - and the same applies here.

If your child is acting out, remember that it can be because they see you as a safe person who they can express their feelings with, trusting that you will love them no matter what - and that it isn't necessarily about you.

Use the family and friends around you - whether it's for a catch-up or having someone to watch the kids so you can have a break.

These are some things that can help you take care of yourself:

You might also find helpful...

Useful helplines and websites

While we take care to ensure that the organisations we signpost to provide high quality information and advice, we cannot take responsibility for any specific pieces of advice they may offer. We encourage parents and carers to always explore the website of a linked service or organisation to understand who they are and what support they offer before engaging with them.

This page was reviewed in April 2021. It was created with a parent or carer with lived experience of supporting their child or young person with anger. We will next review the page in 2024. YoungMinds is a proud member of PIF TICK - the UK's quality mark for trusted health information.
Whether you love the page or think something is missing, we appreciate your feedback. It all helps us to support more young people with their mental health.

Please be aware that this form isn't a mental health support service. If your child is in crisis right now and you want to talk to someone urgently, find out who to contact on our urgent help page.

If you need non-urgent information and advice about your child's mental health, you can use our Parents Helpline.

This form is anonymous. Please do not include personal details like your name or email address. As this form is anonymous, you will not receive a reply. If you would like us to reply, you can contact us instead at ymenquiries@youngminds.org.uk.

We only monitor responses during working hours, Monday to Friday.
At YoungMinds we take your privacy seriously. If you'd like to read more about how we keep the information we collect safe, take a look at our privacy policy.

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If you need support to respond to your child's anger or aggression, read our tips on how to respond and where to seek further help.

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Home > Moving Up Moving up Emotional resilience for new school adventures Moving up and changing school is a big change for children and parents or caregivers. It’s a new stage of growing independence and separation – and ‘togetherness’ may look different. Fears and worries are normal as well as excitement, as with each stage […]

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Guidance and resources on children and family law issues, including relationship breakdown and children in the context of divorce or separation, plus children in public law and cross-border disputes.

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National Association of Child Contact Centres

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National Association of Child Contact Centres

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Search & filter child contact services in your area

NACCC centres and services have an accreditation process which shows that they have agreed to work to approved national standards, ensuring that families using those services are safe and well cared for. For centres in Scotland, please contact Relationships Scotland.

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Find a child contact centre in your area. NACCC child contact centres and services have an endorsed accreditation process which shows that they have...

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Over 16,000 highly trained volunteers support the delivery of our service. Our volunteers come from a range of backgrounds and find volunteering rewarding, challenging and fun. We have a range of roles in local Citizens Advice and Witness Service, want to find out more?

Our volunteer opportunities

Find your local Citizens Advice

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Online free advice from Citizens Advice to help you find a way forward, whatever the problem. Our research enables us to campaign on issues affecting people's lives.

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Families Need Fathers | Because Both Parents Matter

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Home | Families Need Fathers | Because Both Parents Matter

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Empowering Families: Children thrive when they maintain positive relationships with both parents, even after separation or divorce.

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Helping young people age 5-25yrs when someone gets sick

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Talking with Children about the Serious Illness of a Family Member Article posted by Bright Horizons on June 15, 2021

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Talking with Children about the Serious Illness of a Family Member

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It is important to tell your children when a family member has a seriously illness. It is important for your child to understand the concept of death.

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Parental Controls

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Most games consoles have internet access, which means your child can go online and chat with other players or make in-game purchases. On many consoles there are parental controls which allow you to manage which features are available to your child. On some devices you can:

turn off chat functions to stop your child from talking to people they don't know

restrict games based on age

turn off in-game purchases, or set a limit.

Check the website for the console your child has for a parents section and details of features. Some games also allow you to change settings for that individual game.
PlayStation Family Management
On PlayStation consoles you can set up a Family Manager account which allows you to manage different accounts for different children/users. Within this you can manage a range of features, such as restricting communication with other players, restricting content, setting play time controls and set spending limits. See all the features available for PS4 and for PS5.

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If you're worried about what your child's searching for or seeing online, we can help you to set up parental controls and keep them safe.

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Is WhatsApp safe for my child?

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What is WhatsApp?
WhatsApp is one of the most popular instant messaging apps, used by over 2 billion people in 180 countries. It allows you to send and receive messages, as well as make voice and video calls. You can connect with people individually or join group chats where lots of people can contribute. All you need to set up a WhatsApp account is a phone number.
What age rating is WhatsApp?
The app is rated 16+.
Features of WhatsApp
To connect you with others, WhatsApp checks your phone's address book for other users and automatically suggests these as your WhatsApp contacts. It also updates your WhatsApp contact list whenever your phone contacts sign up to the app. This is an optional feature, and you can switch it off, but this puts limits on the app's functionality.

When you are using WhatsApp, certain information is shared with your contacts:

Status - this allows you to share updates on your profile in the form of text, photo, video, or GIF that disappears after 24 hours.

Last seen - this tells your contacts what time you last used the app.

Online - this tells your contacts if you are currently using the app.

Read receipts - this allows users to see if the message has been sent, delivered, and read.

Through the privacy settings in the app, you can help your child control who can see this information.

The new 'Communities' feature allows users to connect multiple groups together under one umbrella to organise group conversations on WhatsApp, meaning that thousands of users can join a community. A WhatsApp community, unlike a group, is a collection of related groups under one roof.

WhatsApp makes use of certain features that are focused on the privacy of its users. Some of these key features are:

End-to-end encryption - this means that only people within the chat can read or listen to what is being sent. WhatsApp cannot view these messages, and they cannot be remotely accessed by police or government, and they can't be seen by hackers. This means that the message privacy is more secure, but also means they can't be monitored for illegal activity.

Disappearing messages - this is an optional feature that allows you to set messages to disappear 24 hours, 7 days, or 90 days after sending. This setting can be applied to all chats or selected ones. It is important to remember that messages can still be saved, screenshotted, or forwarded before they disappear.

View once - this feature allows you to send photos and videos that disappear from your chat once they've been opened. The image or video that you send cannot be saved, shared, or forwarded and you can see when it has been opened (if you have read receipts turned on). The image or video expires after 14 days if it is not opened.

Live location - this allows you to share your real-time location for a certain amount of time with other users in an individual chat or group. You can stop sharing at any time but the people you shared it with will still be able to see your last updated location.

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Explore our WhatsApp guide to ensure privacy settings are being used.

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Is Snapchat safe for my child?

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Tips to help keep your child safe on Snapchat
1. Make sure they sign up with the correct age
Set up your child's Snapchat account together to make sure they sign up with correct age. This will automatically enable settings that help to limit unwanted contact from adults and access to certain features.
2. Talk to them about how to feel good on social media
Children and young people can face lots of different pressures online. Use Childline's advice about How to feel good on social media to help give them the tools to manage their wellbeing online.
3. Set rules around friends
Before your child starts using the app, talk to them about who they can be friends with on the app. Tell them to come to you if they receive a friend request from someone they don't know.
4. Know where to report
There is a chance that your child could come across inappropriate or upsetting content on Snapchat. If this happens, you should report it to the platform. To report a Snap or a story, press and hold on it, then select 'Report Snap'.
5. Talk about what is ok / not ok to share
Ensure that your child knows what personal and private information is, and what is, and is not, appropriate to share online.
6. Explore the safety features
Read below about the 10 safety features that are available, like privacy settings and 'Snapchat Family Centre'.

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1. Make sure they sign up with the correct age Set up your child's Snapchat account together to make sure they sign up with correct age. This will automatically enable settings that help to limit unwanted contact from adults and access to certain features. 2.

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A young carer is someone aged 25 and under who cares for a friend or family member who, due to illness, disability, a mental health problem or an addiction, cannot cope without their support. Older young carers are also known as young adult carers and they may have different support needs to younger carers.

What might a young carer do?

Practical tasks, like cooking, housework and shopping.

Physical care, such as helping someone out of bed.

Emotional support, including talking to someone who is distressed.

Personal care, such as helping someone dress.

Managing the family budget and collecting prescriptions.

Helping to give medicine.

Helping someone communicate.

Looking after brothers and sisters.

How many young carers are there?

The 2011 Census identified 177,918 young carers in England and Wales. One in eight of those were aged under eight.

Scottish Government recognises that there are at least 29,000 young carers in Scotland.

This is widely believed to be the tip of the iceberg, with some estimates suggesting that as many as one in five schoolchildren are young carers (University of Nottingham 2018), with this number increasing during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Being a young carer can have a big impact on the things that are important to growing up

Young carers are already likely to have significantly lower educational attainment than their peers.

With the added complications of COVID-19, young carers have missed out on even more school than before and urgent support is needed if they are not to be left behind their peers.

Caring can also be an isolating experience but having the right support in place can give young carers a better chance of succeeding in all parts of their lives.

How we support young carers

Young Carers Action Day

Young Carers Action Day is an annual event led by Carers Trust. It raises awareness and calls for action to increase support for young people with caring responsibilities. On Young Carers Action Day 2022, we are calling on all governments across the UK to commit to taking action to reduce isolation for young and young adult carers including access to short breaks, These are important in providing much-needed freedom from caring responsibilities, as well as reducing isolation and promoting wellbeing.

Specialist services for young carers

Carers Trust helps young carers to cope with their caring role through specialised services delivered by its network of local carer organisations across the UK. They are independent charities. Activities offered include:

Activities and breaks.

Peer and community support, including young carer groups and peer mentoring schemes.

Information, advice and guidance, including one-to-one support and age appropriate information.

Emotional support.

Advocacy.

Brokerage and support planning.

Training in subjects such as health and safety, wellbeing and life skills.

Supporting families and young carers to apply for appropriate benefits.

Emergency planning support.

Whole family support.

Engaging young carers in informing service development.

I think I might be a young or young adult carer, where can I go for support?

The responsibilities of young and young adult carers vary greatly, so you may be eligible for support, even if you don't feel like you do a lot of caring. If you think that you might be a young or young adult carer, get in touch with your local carer service. Support workers will be able to ensure that you receive the support you need.

Find your local carer service

There are also lots of organisation that can support young carers with a range of issues.

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A young carer is someone aged 25 & under who cares, unpaid, for a friend or family member who cannot cope without their support.

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Being a young carer: your rights - Social care and support guide

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If you are 18 or under and you care for someone you are entitled to help and support.

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A carer is anyone who helps somebody (usually a relative or friend) who needs support in their day to day life due to illness, frailty, disabilities or mental health or substance misuse problems. This is an unpaid role, and is not the same as someone who is paid, provides care professionally, or through a voluntary organisation.

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Helping your child with anger issues - NHS

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Helping your child with anger issues - NHS

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Anger is a normal and useful emotion. It can tell children when things are not fair or right.
But anger can become a problem if a child's angry behaviour becomes out of control or aggressive.

Why is your child so angry?

There are lots of reasons why your child may seem more angry than other children, including:

seeing other family members arguing or being angry with each other

friendship problems

being bullied - Anti-Bullying Alliance has information on bullying

struggling with schoolwork or exams

feeling very stressed, anxious or fearful about something

coping with hormone changes during puberty

It may not be obvious to you or your child why they're feeling angry. If that's the case, it's important to help them work out what might be causing their anger.

Read talking to your child about feelings.

Tackle anger together

Team up with your child to help them deal with their anger. This way, you let your child know that the anger is the problem, not them.

With younger children, this can be fun and creative. Give anger a name and try drawing it - for example, anger can be a volcano that eventually explodes.

How you respond to anger can influence how your child responds to anger. Making it something you tackle together can help you both.

Help your child spot the signs of anger

Being able to spot the signs of anger early can help your child make more positive decisions about how to handle it.

Talk about what your child feels when they start to get angry. For example, they may notice that:

their heart beats faster

their muscles tense

they clench their teeth

they make a fist

their stomach churns

Anger tips for your child

Work together to try to find out what triggers the anger. Talk about helpful strategies for managing anger.

You could encourage your child to:

count to 10

walk away from the situation

breathe slowly and deeply

clench and unclench their fists to ease tension

talk to a trusted person

go to a private place to calm down

If you see the early signs of anger in your child, say so. This gives them the chance to try their strategies.

Encourage regular active play and exercise

Staying active can be a way to reduce or stop feelings of anger. It can also be a way to improve feelings of stress, anxiety or depression.

For older children or young people, this could be simple activities, such as:

a short walk

jogging or running

cycling

Read more about physical activity for children and young people.

Be positive

Positive feedback is important. Praise your child's efforts and your own efforts, no matter how small.

This will build your child's confidence in their ability to manage their anger. It will also help them feel that you're both learning together.

When to get help for anger in children

If you're concerned your child's anger is harmful to them or people around them, you could talk to a:

If necessary, a GP may refer your child to a local children and young people's mental health services for specialist help.

CYPMHS is used as a term for all services that work with children and young people who have difficulties with their emotional or behavioural wellbeing.

You may also be able to refer your child yourself without seeing a GP.

Read more about where to get mental health support.

Further help and support for anger in children

For more support with anger in children, you could phone the YoungMinds parents' helpline free on 0808 802 5544 (9.30am to 4pm, Monday to Friday).

Other sources of help and support include:

If you have older children, find out more about talking to teenagers and coping with your teenager.
The Health for Teens website also has more about anger management

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Advice on how to help your child deal with anger in a positive way.

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The Ministry of Defence has announced that there will be a full UK-wide rollout of the Wraparound Childcare Scheme (WAC) from Autumn 2022.

From the start of the 2022 autumn term, WAC funding will be available to all eligible Service families with children aged 4 to 11 years, who are in school or being home schooled in the UK. If eligible, personnel can claim up to 20 hours per week of funding for each child that is attending before and after school care during term time. Wraparound childcare is also known as 'Out of School care' in Wales and 'School Aged Childcare' in Scotland.

The news comes after the WAC scheme was piloted at various sites, including Catterick Garrison and Woolwich, with over 1,800 children benefitting from the scheme.

Major General Paul Griffiths, The Army's Director Personnel said "The new WAC scheme is a positive step forward in providing the support our people need to continue to meet the demands Service life places upon them. It will directly support our drive to give our people more choice in how they live their lives and ensures those who remain mobile have access to the childcare they need."

What should you do now?

Every child that personnel want to claim WAC funding for must be recorded on JPA and must have a Tax-Free Childcare (TFC) account.

If your child(ren) is not recorded on JPA and/or you do not have a TFC account, Service families should take the following steps now:

1. Record your child(ren) on JPA.

2. Read information about TFC accounts by visiting Tax-Free Childcare on GOV.UK.

3. Check if your family will financially benefit from having a TFC account or a salary sacrifice childcare voucher scheme, including the Armed Forces Childcare Voucher Scheme (AFCVS (Sodexo vouchers)). You cannot have both at the same time. To make an informed decision about which scheme suits your family best, use the childcare calculator on GOV.UK. Please be aware, if you choose to leave the AFCVS, you cannot re-join it.

4. Apply: If you choose to claim WAC funding, you can create a TFC account for your child(ren) on GOV.UK

Where can I find out more?

Keep an eye on our website and social media pages, we will be updating these with further details as we receive them. Service personnel can check the Defence Intranet or Defence Connect for further announcements and more information as it becomes available.

POSTED ON 21 JULY 2022

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Wraparound Childcare - full UK roll-out approved - Army Families Federation

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The Ministry of Defence has announced that there will be a full UK-wide rollout of the Wraparound Childcare Scheme (WAC) from Autumn 2022.

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Self-Harm Questions - 'How do I help my daughter to stop cutting?'

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What not to do if your child is self harming

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What not to do if your child is self harming

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What not to do if a child is self harming

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Experiencing a mental health/ emotional crisis means feeling unable to cope with overwhelming or upsetting thoughts and feelings. Crisis is different for everyone. There may be different triggers and different ways in which people experience crisis- there is no right or wrong way to think or feel when in crisis. Not everyone who engages in self-harm behaviour is in crisis and not everyone who engages in self-harm is suicidal. Not everyone who experiences suicidal thoughts or urges engages in self-harm and they may not appear to be in crisis.

Situations that might trigger or contribute towards experiencing a mental health or emotional crisis for children and young people:

Relationship difficulties or conflict and arguments with friends, family or partners.

Bulling/ teasing/ harassment (verbal, physical, emotional, financial, sexual); direct or indirect.

Abuse (verbal, physical, emotional, financial, sexual, neglect); direct or indirect
Being in or worrying about being in trouble.

Having multiple demands/ having too many things to process, manage or do
Being a carer and or having increased responsibilities.

Stressful or traumatic life events which can be sudden, unexpected or expected such as accidents, injury or illness, bereavement, family breakdown or change in living circumstances.

Physical health illness or pain (to self or other)

Change or transition (e.g., school)

Perceived or real failure/ not meeting expectations or hopes

Build up of difficulties or long term

Extreme fatigue

Drug and alcohol misuse

Self-Harm
Self-harm involves the act of doing something to cause harm or omitting to do something which in turn may cause harm (such as not taking prescribed medications).

There are many forms of self-harm.

There are many reasons why a young person may engage in self-harm and each individual episode of self-harm may have a different trigger or reason. The most important thing to know about self-harm is that it is purposeful and meaningful; it serves a need or function.

Self-harm can be a very secretive behaviour as if often associated with feelings such as guilt and shame which can make it hard for someone to share how they are feeling and what they are doing. Here are some signs to look out for;

Unexplained cuts, bruises or cigarette burns on the body. These marks could be anywhere on someone's body.

Unexplained blood stains on tissues, sheets or clothing.

Keeping themselves fully covered at all times, even in hot weather.

Self-loathing and low self-esteem; blaming themselves, thinking they're not good enough or expressing a wish to punish themselves ; making statements of worthlessness or hopelessness.

Becoming very withdrawn and not speaking to others.

Unusual weight loss or weight gain, or changes in eating habits. A young person may try to hide this by wearing loose clothing or being secretive about eating.

Evidence of vomiting in toilets, wash basins, showers or baths (drains may become blocked).

Suicide
Suicide is the act of intentionally and purposefully ending one's life.
A lot of young people may experience thoughts about wanting to harm themselves or end their life, particularly when in crisis or they experience a distressing life event.

It can be difficult to notice if a young person is experiencing thoughts and urges or even making plans to end their life, particularly as suicidal thoughts and urges can occur suddenly, unexpectedly and impulsively, especially among adolescents.

Some signs include but are not limited to;

Withdrawing from friends, family, responsibilities, commitments and previously enjoyed activities.

Low mood and or irritability which is uncharacteristic.

Uncharacteristically reckless behaviour.

Disinterest in maintaining personal hygiene or appearance.

Poor diet changes, rapid weight changes.

Appearing distracted or agitated.

Poor sleep.

Alcohol or drug misuse.

Expressing or appearing hopeless; failing to see a future or appearing to give up or be disinterested in their hopes, dreams, goals or ambitions.

Believing they are a burden to others.

Saying they feel worthless or alone.

Talking about death or wanting to die

Steps to take if a young person is in crisis or makes a disclosure of self-harm or suicidal intent:

Protect time and space to listen to them without interruption; think about the setting you are in.

Listen calmly, without judgement or rushing to solutions (unless it is an emergency and requires immediate intervention).

Validate the emotion, not necessarily the behaviour.

Provide information about where or how to access appropriate support.

Encourage young people to make safe, informed decisions.

Don't make promises you can't keep

Making a crisis and coping plan with a young person:
Every young person could benefit from having their own person crisis and coping plan, whether they are known to experience episodes of crisis or not. A crisis and coping plan can be completed by anyone but should always be done with a young person.

A crisis and coping plan should consider the following;

What it looks like when the young person is well, coping and functioning at their usual level.

What early warning signs begin to show when a young person is struggling.

What signs indicate when a young person is in crisis.

What some of the triggers or contributing factors might be for a crisis.

An action plan of what to do when the early warning signs are showing.

An action plan of what to do when in crisis

For a copy of a coping and crisis plan you can use with a young person click on the download below.

To watch a video of someone completing this coping and crisis plan with a young person click here: https://youtu.be/Ls8i391_aCc

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Experiencing a mental health/ emotional crisis means feeling unable to cope with overwhelming or upsetting thoughts and feelings. Crisis is different for everyone. There may be different triggers and different ways in which people experience crisis- there is no right or wrong way to think or feel when in crisis. Not everyone who engages in self-harm behaviour is in crisis and not everyone who engages in self-harm is suicidal. Not everyone who experiences suicidal thoughts or urges engages in self-harm and they may not appear to be in crisis.

Situations that might trigger or contribute towards experiencing a mental health or emotional crisis for children and young people:

Relationship difficulties or conflict and arguments with friends, family or partners.

Bulling/ teasing/ harassment (verbal, physical, emotional, financial, sexual); direct or indirect.

Abuse (verbal, physical, emotional, financial, sexual, neglect); direct or indirect
Being in or worrying about being in trouble.

Having multiple demands/ having too many things to process, manage or do
Being a carer and or having increased responsibilities.

Stressful or traumatic life events which can be sudden, unexpected or expected such as accidents, injury or illness, bereavement, family breakdown or change in living circumstances.

Physical health illness or pain (to self or other)

Change or transition (e.g., school)

Perceived or real failure/ not meeting expectations or hopes

Build up of difficulties or long term

Extreme fatigue

Drug and alcohol misuse

Self-Harm
Self-harm involves the act of doing something to cause harm or omitting to do something which in turn may cause harm (such as not taking prescribed medications).

There are many forms of self-harm.

There are many reasons why a young person may engage in self-harm and each individual episode of self-harm may have a different trigger or reason. The most important thing to know about self-harm is that it is purposeful and meaningful; it serves a need or function.

Self-harm can be a very secretive behaviour as if often associated with feelings such as guilt and shame which can make it hard for someone to share how they are feeling and what they are doing. Here are some signs to look out for;

Unexplained cuts, bruises or cigarette burns on the body. These marks could be anywhere on someone's body.

Unexplained blood stains on tissues, sheets or clothing.

Keeping themselves fully covered at all times, even in hot weather.

Self-loathing and low self-esteem; blaming themselves, thinking they're not good enough or expressing a wish to punish themselves ; making statements of worthlessness or hopelessness.

Becoming very withdrawn and not speaking to others.

Unusual weight loss or weight gain, or changes in eating habits. A young person may try to hide this by wearing loose clothing or being secretive about eating.

Evidence of vomiting in toilets, wash basins, showers or baths (drains may become blocked).

Suicide
Suicide is the act of intentionally and purposefully ending one's life.
A lot of young people may experience thoughts about wanting to harm themselves or end their life, particularly when in crisis or they experience a distressing life event.

It can be difficult to notice if a young person is experiencing thoughts and urges or even making plans to end their life, particularly as suicidal thoughts and urges can occur suddenly, unexpectedly and impulsively, especially among adolescents.

Some signs include but are not limited to;

Withdrawing from friends, family, responsibilities, commitments and previously enjoyed activities.

Low mood and or irritability which is uncharacteristic.

Uncharacteristically reckless behaviour.

Disinterest in maintaining personal hygiene or appearance.

Poor diet changes, rapid weight changes.

Appearing distracted or agitated.

Poor sleep.

Alcohol or drug misuse.

Expressing or appearing hopeless; failing to see a future or appearing to give up or be disinterested in their hopes, dreams, goals or ambitions.

Believing they are a burden to others.

Saying they feel worthless or alone.

Talking about death or wanting to die

Steps to take if a young person is in crisis or makes a disclosure of self-harm or suicidal intent:

Protect time and space to listen to them without interruption; think about the setting you are in.

Listen calmly, without judgement or rushing to solutions (unless it is an emergency and requires immediate intervention).

Validate the emotion, not necessarily the behaviour.

Provide information about where or how to access appropriate support.

Encourage young people to make safe, informed decisions.

Don't make promises you can't keep

Making a crisis and coping plan with a young person:
Every young person could benefit from having their own person crisis and coping plan, whether they are known to experience episodes of crisis or not. A crisis and coping plan can be completed by anyone but should always be done with a young person.

A crisis and coping plan should consider the following;

What it looks like when the young person is well, coping and functioning at their usual level.

What early warning signs begin to show when a young person is struggling.

What signs indicate when a young person is in crisis.

What some of the triggers or contributing factors might be for a crisis.

An action plan of what to do when the early warning signs are showing.

An action plan of what to do when in crisis

For a copy of a coping and crisis plan you can use with a young person click on the download below.

To watch a video of someone completing this coping and crisis plan with a young person click here: https://youtu.be/Ls8i391_aCc

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Managing Self-Harm - Hampshire Safeguarding Children Partnership

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We help all those affected by domestic abuse by providing innovative and unique services. We work to ensure that victims are supported to recover and perpetrators are supported to change their behaviour.

Do you need support and advice or safe and secure accommodation?

We offer a confidential support service, simply call or email today:

If you are in an emergency situation

If it is unsafe for you to speak on the phone, after dialling 999 just press 55 for the silent solution.

You can also text 999.

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We help all those affected by domestic abuse by providing innovative and unique services. We work to ensure that victims are supported to recover and perpetrators are supported to change their behaviour.

Do you need support and advice or safe and secure accommodation?

We offer a confidential support service, simply call or email today:

If you are in an emergency situation

If it is unsafe for you to speak on the phone, after dialling 999 just press 55 for the silent solution.

You can also text 999.

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We help all those affected by domestic abuse by providing innovative and unique services. We work to ensure that victims are supported to recover and perpetrators are supported to change their behaviour.

Do you need support and advice or safe and secure accommodation?

We offer a confidential support service, simply call or email today:

If you are in an emergency situation

If it is unsafe for you to speak on the phone, after dialling 999 just press 55 for the silent solution.

You can also text 999.

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We help all those affected by domestic abuse by providing innovative and unique services. We work to ensure that victims are supported to recover and perpetrators are supported to change their behaviour.

Do you need support and advice or safe and secure accommodation?

We offer a confidential support service, simply call or email today:

If you are in an emergency situation

If it is unsafe for you to speak on the phone, after dialling 999 just press 55 for the silent solution.

You can also text 999.

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We’re there for parents when they need us the most, because childhood can’t wait.

Making a difference in Hampshire

Number of Children Supported

Number of Families Supported

Volunteers Supporting Families

Number of Children Supported

Number of Families Supported

Volunteers Supporting Families

Volunteer Training

Home-Start Hampshire is a local charity supporting parents who are going through challenging times. Trained volunteers work alongside families to give compassionate and confidential support, tailored to each family. At the heart of Home-Start Hampshire is our...

Kenwood cookery project

Over the past six weeks we have been running a cookery course in the Havant. The parents on the cooking course have learnt to cook a selection of meals from scratch: soup, dog-in the-hole, bolognaise, curry, crumble and sponge-cake!  Many parents had no cooking...

Loves Labours Lost

Join Home-Start Hampshire for this Open Air Shakespeare Production at the stunning riverside location of Bucklers Hard performed by The Villagers Open Air Shakespeare Group . Pre play entertainment by Singing group Intersection.  Date: Sunday 17th July 2022...

Being a parent, whatever your situation, can be very challenging. Many parents feel exhausted and overwhelmed by the stresses of family life. For some parents it’s a particular struggle because they are also coping with issues such as post-natal depression, their or their child’s illness or disability, isolation or multiple births.

That’s when parents need support. That’s when Home-Start Hampshire can help.

A trained volunteer is carefully matched to a family, visiting regularly and offering emotional and practical support.

This support is a simple yet effective way of enabling families to get back on track.

Please take a moment to browse through the pages of this website to find out more about our service or how you could offer your support to the charity.

Maybe you could make a donation or hold a fundraising event on our behalf. Click here to find out more.

Looking for the news?  Please visit our news page

We work with you to build on your strength and give you the support you tell us you need.

By volunteering a few hours each week you can transform the lives of children and their parents in the community.

A child’s early years are the most important. Home-Start wants to make sure those years count. Can you help us?

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You can use the buttons below to quickly locate information about this organisation. Click on a button to go to the relevant page.

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April is international month of the military child Find out more here ENTER NOW our Through Our Eyes photo competition Find out more here Supporting all children of our British Armed Forces Little Troopers is a registered charity supporting all military children who have parent(s) serving in our British Armed Forces, regular or reserve.

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Are you feeling sad or worried about school?

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Are you feeling sad or worried about school?