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Describing the Behavior and Why the Behavior is Considered Deviant

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Describing the Behavior and Why the Behavior is Considered Deviant

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Being involved in your child’s upbringing is profoundly important, and that should go without saying. Whether it pertains to academia, relationships, or hobbies, it’s important for children to be monitored as they navigate through life’s numerous obstacles and challenges. The problem lies when parents demonstrate an approach that’s too controlling, where there’s too much monitoring. It lies when parents monitor every homework assignment that their child has, monitors every text that their child sends, every hobby that they enjoy. This is what is termed “helicopter parenting”, where the parent hovers over every aspect of their child’s life to the point where the child has no autonomy. This type of parental behavior can negatively affect childhood development in a variety of different ways, and some parents may be unaware that they’re exhibiting these behaviors. Therefore, I decided to research this topic and apply class concepts to this outlandish method of parenting so that everybody will have a better understanding.

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From a perspective of Adler’s ABC’s and 3 S’s, behavior and selection apply the best regarding helicopter parenting. For one, the parents are engaging in a deviant, outlandish act by hovering over every single aspect of their child’s life which explains how it’s deviant from a behavior standpoint, and two, the parents are intentionally choosing to engage in this parenting style, within their own control, which is why the selection component works best here.

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Blemishes of individual character would apply to helicopter parents because people would notice their over-controlling mannerisms in public. For example: If a kid was working on his homework with his mom in a coffee shop, and she was being overly critical out loud and correcting every miniscule mistake, people would probably be giving her a side-eye, and some people may even intervene. Regarding the type of stigma, helicopter parents have a discreditable stigma because unless they’re around their kids, people would never know if they’re helicopter parents or not.

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The social constructionist/relativist conception applies to helicopter parenting because the entire concept of helicopter parenting could mean different things to different people. For example, one person from the same culture as the mom may see the overly strict and hovering approach with her son and his homework as completely normal; whereas another person from a different culture in the same coffee shop may see that behavior and may be in complete shock.

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Robert Merton’s Strain Theory suggests that people tend to obtain an emotional strain while in the pursuit of societal goals that are difficult to reach and thus turn to deviant means as a result. From the perspective of helicopter parenting, the parents may see the extremely high expectations that society places on individuals in order to reach success in various domains of life which causes emotional strain and baggage on themselves. As a result, they approach parenting with a sense of being overly involved in every aspect of their kid's life because in their minds, it’s the best way to prepare their children for society’s strenuous standards. Regarding adaptations, innovation is the most applicable in this case because while the parents accept the goals and standards of society for their children, they use the illegitimate means of being excessively involved, rather than a healthier moderate approach.

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How These Deviants View Their Own Behavior

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How These Deviants View Their Own Behavior

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People may see a helicopter parent being overly critical and authoritative pertaining to their child in public and might think that it’s just a one-time aberration of a child that has just been misbehaving or a parent that’s in a bad mood, but it’s much more nuanced than that. Helicopter parents have profoundly authoritarian general parenting styles, so they therefore see it as a deviant career that’s a necessity for their children until they become adults or even potentially beyond.

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Helicopter-parenting has a variety of impacts on children in society that can be harmful, and, believe it or not, somewhat positive. According to a 2012 empirical study by Padilla-Walker and Nelson examining the effect of helicopter parenting on child well-being, “children of helicopter parents appeared to see their parents in terms of a relationship high in guidance, involvement, and emotional support but likewise acknowledged a lack of autonomy being granted them by their parents” (Padilla-Walker & Nelson, 2012). Results from another 2014 study from Schiffrin and colleagues that looked into the effect of helicopter parenting on the well-being of college students found that “Helicopter parenting was related to lower feelings of autonomy, competence, and relatedness”, and “A lower sense of autonomy and competence was related to depression” (Schiffrin et al., 2014). On the positive side, children of helicopter parents will rarely feel isolated or without guidance from their caring parents; however they are likely to be left without a sense of autonomy, which could affect their decision-making and mental health as they emerge into adulthood where they have to start transitioning towards an independent lifestyle.

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Goffman. Erving, Stigma: Notes on the Management of Spoiled Identity. New York: Touchstone (Reissue edition). 1986. 2 ISBN: 978-06716224422

Padilla-Walker, L. M., & Nelson, L. J. (2012). Black hawk down?: Establishing helicopter parenting as a distinct construct from other forms of parental control during emerging adulthood. Journal of adolescence, 35(5), 1177-1190.

Schiffrin, H. H., Liss, M., Miles-McLean, H., Geary, K. A., Erchull, M. J., & Tashner, T. (2014). Helping or hovering? The effects of helicopter parenting on college students’ well-being. Journal of child and family studies, 23, 548-557.