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I was finally in with all of the students. Then I was leaving. It sucked. I was finally at the point that I could go up to any student and help them with whatever they were working on. I learned many ways to how to, as well as few ways not to, handle a classroom of students with a different background than me. I also realize how patient I need to be with many of the students. Learning people's names is not enough to get to know them, or earn their trust. I cannot wait to go back to North next semester if I can. I plunged into the water unable to see what was inside, and I came out a Polar.

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Pushed back into the freezing water (Election Day)

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Pushed back into the freezing water (Election Day)

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I'm sure many people will talk about the election in their reflections, but it was a major event especially in high schools like North were the majority of students are students of color. The tension in the school was obvious. Walking to my first class students were in the hallway shouting "F*** Trump!" Being one of the few white people in the school I felt uncomfortable. Not because I was afraid of the students of color but because I knew they felt discourage and hopeless. I felt they may accuse me of voting for Trump or ask me questions about politics that I am ill equipped to answer. At the beginning of class I saw a power point the teacher had on the screen that just screamed cookie-cutter presentation prepared by the administration. My teacher did something at this point knowing she had to set the mood of the class and I thought she handled it very well. She told the class she had a presentation that the administration put together and she asked them if the wanted to see it, or if they would rather just talk about it with her. The class obviously did not want the presentation. We talked about it the whole class period and a lot of the kids were pretty upset. I had to explain my point of view as a few of the students did assume that because I was a white male I supported Trump. It taught me the importance of cultural relevance in the classroom. We can talk about it all the time in class but seeing in person really drives it home. The teacher and I let the students control the classroom and the conversation and tried to make them feel like they could talk to us about everything after I told them my point of view.

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I knew I wouldn't get help from the students, so I began learning their names. In addition to that I was not forceful with developing a relationship with them. I was coming into their world and barging through the door like I owned the place was a quick way to have these students reject you. Slowly but surely I was able to get these students to open up to me. I started small by just asking them questions if they needed help or how they were doing. The easiest students were the athletes. This semester North's football team won their division in the state competition. Every week I asked them how their team was doing and showed I was actually interested. The seemed to sense that I was genuinely interested and that was my in with them.  The loud, disruptive students I had no problem getting them to talk to me and ask me for help. The more difficult students were the shy and quiet students. They clearly distrusted me and wanted nothing to do with me. I made sure every day to ask how they were doing and it took awhile, but most of them eventually said good, or okay. It wasn't much but it was a start. The highlight of my semester was when one of the students I had been working on getting to know looked at me at the end of class and said have a nice day. This 4 word phrase, doubled the amount of words she said to me all year. It's strange how much this meant to me, but to me it meant I had finally reached her. It took more than half of the semester but I had earned some of her trust

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Nothing prepared me for the icy water of the polar plunge.

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Nothing prepared me for the icy water of the polar plunge.

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My expectations did not line up with reality in an way. On my first day I got to help out with a lab, and that was the last lab I helped out with all semester. The students, did not want to talk to me as I was a stranger. The picture below shows an almost every day occurrence where the students don't want to sit down and many of the students were constantly on their phones. I knew then I had a lot of work to do just to develop relationships with these students. They were rowdy, refused to sit still for an entire classroom and cursed incessantly despite the teacher reprimanding them every time they did it. On top of that the teacher was in her 4th year and while she seemed like she knew what she was doing, there were times were her inexperience showed.

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Walking into the school on my first day I didn't know what to expect. What I was hoping was that just like in Ayers book I had just started reading, the students would want to help me just as much as I wanted to help them. I wanted to establish a relationship with them where they taught me how to be a better teacher. That would end up being far from reality.  Also, being in a chemistry classroom I was hoping to be involved with labs every week or every other week.

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North Community High School is were I spent my semester helping in a sophomore chemistry classroom. This was always the first sight of the school for me.