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This stage lasts from birth to 18 months of age. During this stage, infants develop a sense of trust. The major question is "Can I trust my caregiver?". They develop this sense of trust by having their needs met. these needs include affection, food, and comfort. Should these needs not be met, they will develop a sense of mistrust. When a child develops a sense of mistrust, they may grow up becoming fearful, anxious, and often experience feelings of loneliness. (Cherry, 2022)

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Piaget's Stages of Cognitive Development

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Piaget's Stages of Cognitive Development

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An egocentric child is unable to view a situation from anyone else's point of view. The child assumes that everyone sees, hears, or even feels the same way as they do.

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During the preoperation stage, children cannot experience self-conscious emotions such as embarrassment or guilt as they are not able to distinguish themself from others (Santrock, 2021).

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This article goes more in depth of what self-conscious emotions are.

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Have you ever taken a second to pay attention to that little voice inside your head? The one that navigates all of us through our daily life?

Inner Monologue and Self-Talk ...

That little voice is often called our "inner monologue" or "self-talk". And paying attention to that voice can be crucial for identifying internalized shame and other self-conscious emotions. In this article, we will hone in on four self-conscious emotions that are often used synonymously, although they are quite different. We will take a look at what it means to practice vulnerability and why it's so important..

1. Shame

2. Guilt

3. Embarrassment

4. Humiliation

Why are they called "self-conscious" emotions?

To be "self-conscious" implies an ability to self-reflect and self-evaluate. Which, by nature, requires a sense of self, a set of values and/or standards, and the ability to compare oneself to others. Self-conscious emotions afford us the ability to relate to and judge ourselves against those around us. Additionally, these types of emotions allow us to have an awareness of how other people perceive us.

Definitions from the American Psychological Association (APA) Dictionary of Psychology:

Shame

n. A highly unpleasant self-conscious emotion arising from the sense of there being something dishonorable, immodest, or indecorous in one's own conduct or circumstances.

Shame is typically characterized by withdrawal from social intercourse-for example, by hiding or distracting the attention of another from one's shameful action-which can have a profound effect on psychological adjustment and interpersonal relationships. Shame motivates avoidance behavior, but also defensive retaliatory anger.

Guilt

n. A self-conscious emotion characterized by a painful appraisal of having done (or thought) something that is wrong.

Guilt often elicits a readiness to take action designed to undo or mitigate this wrong. It is distinct from shame, in which there is the additional strong fear of one's deeds being publicly exposed to judgment or ridicule.

Embarrassment

n. A self-conscious emotion in which a person feels awkward or flustered in other people's company or because of the attention of others.

For example, being embarrassed when observed engaging in actions that are subject to mild disapproval from others. Embarrassment often has an element of self-deprecating humor. And it is typically characterized by nervous laughter, a shy smile, or blushing.

Humiliation

n. A self-conscious emotion, similar to shame, that results from being disgraced or criticized.

Why is shame the most harmful self-conscious emotion?

It is important to pay attention to our shame because it is possibly the most detrimental emotion we experience. Shame doesn't motivate us to do better. In fact, quite the opposite. Shame triggers lowered self-esteem and prompts behaviors that reinforce a negative self-image.

Shame is a universal emotion, which means that as long as you are capable of experiencing emotions, you've experienced shame.

As a self-conscious emotion, shame incorporates the whole self and is often associated with feeling unwanted, inadequate, or unworthy of love. When we experience shame, it is common to also experience physiological symptoms. A dry mouth, the feeling that time is slowing down, a racing heart, twitching or tunnel vision - similar to symptoms that occur when we have a flight-fight-freeze response to something scary or traumatic. It's worthy to note that each person responds differently to shame.

What is the difference between Guilt and Shame?

Dr. Brené Brown is a leading researcher at the University of Houston and an expert in the field of shame, vulnerability, courage, and authenticity. Brown says, "Shame is a focus on self, guilt is a focus on behavior. Shame is, I am bad; Guilt i s, I did something bad."

Psychological research studies have consistently demonstrated a correlation between shame and a variety of mental health problems, including substance abuse, depression, eating disorders, aggression, low self-esteem and isolation. On the other hand, evidence has shown guilt to be inversely related to those problems - instead, guilt is correlated with motivation to change.

How do Embarrassment and Humiliation tie in?

The words "humiliation" and "embarrassment" are often used interchangeably. But the characteristics of embarrassment are: it's fleeting and we aren't alone - others have been there also. Humiliation on the other hand feels lasting, solitary and undeserved. Humiliation often stimulates a similar physiological response to shame (rapid heartbeat, sweaty palms, etc.) But with humiliation, we understand it is unmerited.

Embarrassment is brought on by ourselves, whereas humiliation is something that is brought on by others.

How can we reduce our feelings of shame?

Step 1:Try to be aware of and pay attention to your negative self-talk. We cannot address our internalized shame if we are unaware of it or unable to identify it.

Step 2: Identify whether or not your negative self-talk is concentrated on your behavior (guilt) or your whole self (shame). Work to recognize when you're feeling like you are "not enough".

Step 3: If you recognize that you are experiencing shame, attempt to identify your trigger(s). Ask yourself questions such as: Who have I felt this way around? What was I doing? What was going on when I felt this way? When did I feel this way? Where was I? Why might I feel shame about that?

Step 4: This part is absolutely critical. Brown's research has revealed that the most powerful anecdote for reducing feelings of shame is talking about it. You must tell your story to someone you trust; someone who is willing to practice vulnerability; and someone who will meet you with empathy.

Step 5 (Bonus): Practice positive self-talk!

When you catch that voice in your head putting you down, insulting you, or leading you to a fight, flight or freeze response - turn it around. For example, instead of that voice saying things like, "I haven't accomplished enough, "say something positive. For example, "I'll try to do better next time." Or say, "I have many accomplishments. And there is plenty of time to set and reach future goals."

Have you heard that forcing a smile can trick your brain into making you feel happier? Well, several research studies have proved this to be true. If we can trick our brain (so to speak) by faking a smile, then shouldn't playing the whole "fake-it-till-we-make-it" self-talk card, have some benefits?

How does vulnerability help to manage shame and self-conscious emotions?

Working on addressing and reducing our own internalized shame is not a walk in the park. It might sound simple, "Just share your feelings of shame with someone you trust." But we all know that some things are easier said than done. Here's the cold-hard truth... If you don't practice vulnerability, your shame isn't going anywhere. But, practicing vulnerability is generally uncomfortable, awkward, and sometimes even anxiety-provoking. Vulnerability is our friend who feels more like a 'frenemy'.

What does it mean to be vulnerable? Many people think being vulnerable means you exposed, weak, inadequate, or defenseless. However, people who practice vulnerability are usually courageous, brave, and often more resilient for doing so. Practicing vulnerability means revealing your authentic and true self. Flaws, mistakes, regrets, secrets and all.

It is a sincere, honest, and meaningful expression of your deepest thoughts and feelings to someone you trust. The evidence is irrefutable, human beings are hard-wired for connection with other human beings. And the driving force behind connection is vulnerability. Without vulnerability, it is simply not possible to build healthy connections with others.

So, go out there and be brave.

And be vulnerable.

Create meaningful connections with others. (Even if the connections are virtual!)

And pay attention to your self-talk. Train your inner-monologue to sound more like talking to someone you love and respect. Understand the difference between shame, guilt, embarrassment, and humiliation. And be patient and kind with yourself. Only share your story with someone who has earned the right to hear it.

Lastly, at the end of each day remind yourself, you will never be "not enough".

Resources:

The American Psychological Association (APA) Dictionary of Psychology.
Brown, B. (2007). Shame resilience theory. Contemporary human behavior theory: A critical perspective for social work.
Brown, B. (2015). Daring greatly: How the courage to be vulnerable transforms the way we live, love, parent, and lead. Penguin.
Brown, B. (2008). I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn't): Making the Journey from What Will People Think? to I Am Enough. Avery.

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Have you ever taken a second to pay attention to that little voice inside your head? The one that navigates all of us through our daily life? That little voice is often called our "inner monologue" or "self-talk". And paying attention to that voice can be crucial for identifying internalized shame and other self-conscious emotions.

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This stage lasts from 18 months to 3 years. In this stage, they develop a sense of if they can do things on their own (Ex: toilet training, food preferences, dressing themselves). They develop this by being provided opportunities to be independent. Should they not have these opportunities or not be supported in them, they will begin to doubt themselves and develop feelings of shame (Cherry, 2022).

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Piaget concluded that children go through two different stages in terms of thinking about morality. These stages are heteronomous morality and autonomous morality.

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This stage is during the preschool years. During this stage, they are learning “am I good or bad?”. They begin to try new things, often with imaginative play. They are able to develop a sense of security in their initiative to try new things when they are given the freedom to do so. without it, they develop feelings of guilt, and become afraid of trying new things. Excessive criticism can also create this feeling of fear and guilt (Cherry, 2022).

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During this stage, a child learns if they can feel confident in their ability to do things on their own and acheive their goals. Industry is reached as long as they are encouraged by their teachers and caregivers. If they are encouraged and supported in this time appropriately, they will begin to feel industrious. Should they be discouraged or not be able to acheive their goals and learn new skills, they may develop a sense of inferiority. This will lead to a lack of self-confidence and feelings of anxiety. (Mcleod, 2018).

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This stage occurs between the ages of 12 and 18 years old. They are learning about who they are and developing a sense of self and identity. Factors that go into a strong sense of identity include healthy relationships with others, self-confidence, commitment, and a sense of independence. Being able to form healthy relationships with others and being able to commit to a social group or even a career path can be extremely helpful during this stage(Cherry,2022) .

There are four statuses to Identity Development:
• Identity Diffusion - commitments to identity have not yet been made
• Identity Foreclosure - committing to an identity without exploring options, which is often due to pressures from others such as loved ones
• Identity Moratorium - seeking out options for paths in life and identity exploration
• Identity Achievement - when ones identity has been explored and then committed to. If this is successfully achieved, one will have a strong sense of self

Should a sense of identity not be achieved, one will experience role confusion. Role confusion can lead to commitment issues, a lack of a sense of self, a lack of self confidence, and poor mental health (Cherry, 2022)

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This stage occurs between the ages of 19 and 40. During this stage, one is trying to develop relationships with others. To be successful in this stage, one may develop intimate relationships with others and feel a strong sense of connection and fulfillment. Should one fail in this state, they will experience feelings of isolation. They often become lonely and may have unhealthy relationships with others with a weak support system. Isolation can be caused by fears of intimacy and connection, death of a partner, divorce, childhood abuse and neglect, and the inability to open up to others (Cherry, 2022)

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This stage occurs in mid to late stages of life, which is around 40 to 65 years or age. Generativity in this context means “ "making your mark" on the world by caring for others, as well as through creating and accomplishing things that make the world a better place” (Cherry, 2022). One is succeesful in this stage when they do things such as develop familial relationships, making commitments, mentoring, parenting, or contributing in some way to the generation below them. Those who are successful have feelings of fulfillment and contentment. Failing in this stage means stagnation. Stagnation can result in cognitive decline, poor health, negative impact on relationships, and an overall dissatisfaction with their lives.

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The final stage of life occurs between age 65 and death, and it is ones final outlooks on life. If one has acheived integrity successfully, they have a feeling of acceptance, peace, fullfilment and success with their lives. Should they not reach this successfully they will be overcome with feelings of despair. Despair can result in bitterness, regret, depression, and an overall feeling that their life was somehow “wasted”. Depression is one of the major results of despair, which causes feelings of loneliness, worthlessness, and sadness. To repair these feelings of despair, one can reach out to others, try new things, engage in religion or spiritual practice, or ask for professional help (Cherry,2022)

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Erikson’s 8 Stages of Psychosocial Development Explained

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Erik Erikson Stages of Psychosocial Development Theory

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Television representations of Piaget's Moral Development

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A child's peers have a large impact on gender development. A playground has been known to be called "gender school" due to the roles put in place when children play (Santrock, 2021).

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As a child goes through the cognitive development stages, gender schemas develop (Santrock, 2021). From a young age, children understand what is acceptable for each gender.

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Butler, S. [Sierra Butler]. (2015, March 3). Piaget’s stages of moral development [Video]. YouTube.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uH9bGgEGO3I

DeZalia, R. P. [Rebekah Phillips DeZalia]. (2014, October 31). PSY 241 - 13.1 piaget moral development

[Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W15lrtjtwJQ

McLeod, S. (2018). The preoperational stage of cognitive development. Simply Psychology.

https://www.simplypsychology.org/preoperational.html#:~:text=Egocentrism%20refers%20to%20the%20

child's,feature%20of%20the%20preoperational%20child

Sanford Behavioral Health. (2021). Shame and the self-conscious emotions. Sanford Behavioral Health.

https://sanfordbehavioralhealth.com/2021/01/30/shame-self-conscious-emotions/

Santrock, J. W. (2021). Life-span development (18th ed.). McGraw-Hill Education.

Stages of cognitive development. (n.d.). Psych-Mental Health Hub.

https://pmhealthnp.com/stages-of-cognitive-development/

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8 stages of development by Erik Erikson. YouTube. (2017, April 23). Retrieved September 30, 2022, from https://youtu.be/aYCBdZLCDBQ

Cherry, K. (2022, August 3). Understanding Erikson's stages of psychosocial development. Verywell Mind. Retrieved September 30, 2022, from https://www.verywellmind.com/erik-eriksons-stages-of-psychosocial-development-2795740

Erik Erikson stages of psychosocial development theory. YouTube. (2021, October 28). Retrieved September 30, 2022, from https://youtu.be/41h08L5n_Ls

Mcleod], [S. (1970, January 1). [Erik Erikson's stages of psychosocial development]. Erik Erikson's 8 Stages of Psychosocial Development. Retrieved September 30, 2022, from https://www.simplypsychology.org/Erik-Erikson.html