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The Kübler-Ross model of Death is a well-known theory developed by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross that describes the five stages an individual goes through when confronted with an approaching death that will occur to themselves or a loved one (Leishman & Moir, 2009). These five stages are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. This model from Kübler does not intend to serve as a strict linear path, it instead aims to serve as a framework for understanding grief and spotting patterns within individuals who are exhibiting signs of grief (Tyrell et al., 2023). To begin, when first hearing about one’s upcoming death or experiencing a loss, one may try to deny or refuse to believe this information. By refusing one’s reality, this allows the individual to continue to live in their own reality where death has not occurred or is taking place. Living in one’s own reality can result in the individual continuing to act as if nothing is wrong, which is normal as it gives one an appropriate amount of time to recover, however, constant denial may result in one never being able to come to terms with one’s grief (Leishman & Moir, 2009). Secondly, people may use anger as another response which can be beneficial for some. For instance, individuals may have sudden outbursts towards family members, hospital-care workers, or even a religious figure. Although some may find it soothing to release their anger in this way, anger may result in isolation, loneliness, or even abandonment (Leishman & Moir, 2009). Bargaining is the next stage in the Kübler-Ross model. In this stage, individuals may find themselves in the position of begging with a god above to either delay one’s death, or negotiating to bring back a loved one. Depression is a coping mechanism that typically follows after experiencing the three previous stages. Individuals may fall into this state while experiencing feelings of sadness, fatigue, or dejectedness (Tyrell et al., 2023). Finally, acceptance is the last stage of the Kübler-Ross model. Individuals in this stage are able to accept their reality, whether it be their upcoming death or the loss of a loved one. It is important to note that most people will not follow all stages of grief listed in the Kübler-Ross model. They may skip over a stage, or experience different emotions than what is listed on the model, such as yearning, anxiety, or even disbelief. Some individuals may even repeat stages before they are fully ready to move on.

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Grief is a normal and healthy reaction that one will go through after experiencing the loss of a loved one. One may even experience grief after losing a cherished item or their job. Grief is a common response to loss, however, everyone will experience grief differently. For example, someone’s religion, culture, or upbringing are some factors that may affect how one expresses grief. Grief is a unique experience to each individual as people will go through different stages. A prolonged amount of grief, however, may lead to detrimental effects on one’s health. Furthermore, coping with grief can take many forms. It can range from journaling to expressing your current grief with a family member and letting yourself cry. While there are positive ways to cope, there are also negative coping strategies, such as seeking alcohol or harmful substances, that people may turn to. Grief is an important process to acknowledge and learn about as it helps us grow as individuals, along with teaching us to readapt to our environment and resume our life roles after the loss of someone close.

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As stated earlier, while it is healthy to express grief, experiencing a heavy amount of grief for a long time may negatively effect one’s overall health. Complicated grief, or persistent complex bereavement disorder, deviates from the normal grieving process as individuals with complicated grief experience prolonged painful yearning and longing (Nakajima, 2018). This disorder involves heightened and intense feelings of grief, which may interrupt an individual’s daily routine. Some other symptoms of complicated grief include emotional pain, persistent fixation on thoughts and memories of a deceased person, being unable to accept the reality of the loss of a loved one, and struggling to imagine a purposeful future without the deceased person (Nakajima, 2018). The prolonged period of time that these symptoms linger is what makes complicated grief differ from normal grief after the loss of a loved one. Though there is no known cause of complicated grief, some risk factors for developing this disorder include an unexpected or violent death, death of a child, social isolation, or a traumatic childhood experience (“Complicated Grief”, 2022). Additionally, there is no clear way to prevent complicated grief, however, talking about one’s own grief with others, having a support system, and taking bereavement counseling after experiencing a loss are a few options to consider as it may reduce the chances of it developing, especially if you are at risk (“Complicated Grief”, 2022). Complicated grief is not the only disorder related to abnormal grief as there are other conditions with overlapping symptoms. Being able to acknowledge and differentiate these types of grief allows one to be able to better support others who are dealing with grief, or even ourselves.

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Overall, there is no specific path or pattern to follow when it comes to processing grief. What works for most may not work for others. People will emotionally grieve in ways that they find most comfortable, such as expressing feelings of anger or being in denial for some time. Grief is a unique process and comes in many stages, and may even develop or deviate into a different type of grief, such as complicated grief, depending on certain risk factors. It is important to teach ourselves and others about the grief process (including strategies to cope effectively) if we wish to support ourselves, family members, friends, and others who may eventually go through or have gone through the experience of losing someone. Lastly, being there for our loved ones while they are still alive and well should be our main priority in this day and age. Anything could happen at any time, so it is crucial that we cherish every moment that we have with those we love.

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Leishman, J. L., & Moir, J. (2009). Perspectives on death and dying. M & K Publishing.

Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research. (2022, December 13). Complicated grief. Mayo Clinic. https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/complicated-grief/symptoms-causes/syc-20360374

Nakajima S. (2018). Complicated grief: recent developments in diagnostic criteria and treatment. Philosophical transactions of the Royal Society of London. Series B, Biological sciences, 373(1754), 20170273. https://doi.org/10.1098/rstb.2017.0273

Tyrell, P., Siddiqui, W., Schoo, C., & Harbenger, S. (2023, February 26). Kubler-Ross Stages of Dying and Subsequent Models of Grief. National Center for Biotechnology Information. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK507885/

Wein, H. (2022, July 26). Coping with grief. National Institutes of Health. https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2017/10/coping-grief

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While the Kübler-Ross model is more widely accepted, there are still other models of grief which differ from Kübler’s model that offer further perspectives on how individuals may experience and express grief. Some other models of grief include Bowlby and Parkes' Four Phases of  Grief, Worden's Four Tasks of Mourning, and Wolfelt's Companioning model. The Bowlby and Parkes’ model by psychologists John Bowlby and Colin Murray Parkes takes inspiration from the Kübler-Ross model and describes four stages of grief: shock and disbelief, yearning and searching, disorganization and despair, and rebuilding and recovery (Tyrell et al., 2023). This model also emphasizes that experiencing grief is not always a linear path, similar to the Kübler-Ross model. Next, Worden’s Four Tasks of Mourning is a model of grief created by William Worden that uses tasks instead of stages which an individual who has experienced a loss or is facing death must complete (in no specific order) in order to be able to fully heal and come to terms with one’s loss (Tyrell et al., 2023). For some individuals, they may find themselves repeating certain tasks before they are truly ready to heal. These four tasks described by Worden are accepting the loss, allowing oneself to feel and express grief, resuming all roles or hobbies that one previously was engaged in before encountering a loss, and redirecting one’s emotional energy into engaging in new activities and participating in pleasurable experiences (Tyrell et al., 2023). Lastly, Alan Wolfelt's Companion model emphasizes the importance of expressing one’s grief in order to heal from experiencing a loss, however in this model, there are no tasks because it does not aim to resolve one’s grief (Tyrell et al., 2023). Wolfelt also notes that a bereaved individual is typically supported by another individual who takes on the companion role and supports the bereaved during their time of grieving. These few models of grief aid in expanding upon the Kübler-Ross model with different perspectives and input in order to fully capture the grieving process.

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Coping with grief can vary from each individual when it comes to strategies to utilize. For instance, while some prefer to talk about their feelings, others would rather do things instead of talking, such as taking a walk, going for a swim, or painting (Wein, 2022). One strategy to help cope with grief that should be considered is talking with others or a support system, such as friends or family, about one’s current grief. Talking about our own grief allows us to face our reality and be comforted by the person we are expressing ourselves to. Additionally, we may even talk to a bereavement counselor about our grief, which is also another strategy. Seeking grief counseling allows one to communicate to professionals who are educated in this topic and can provide an individual with valuable guidance. Seeing a grief counselor should be considered if an individual’s grief is causing some issues such as difficulty sleeping, a loss of appetite over a long period of time, or suicidal thoughts. Moreover, taking care of yourself can help in coping with loss. Eating and exercising regularly are simple ways in which one can take their mind off of their deceased loved one. Some may even consider alcohol and drugs as a way to cope, however, these are only temporary solutions that can only worsen one’s health with no positive outcomes. One last strategy is joining a support group, either online or in-person. Finding a community of people who share a  similar experience to you can be therapeutic as it shows that you are not alone. These are only a few strategies listed, however, there are still several strategies out there that people partake in as a way to effectively cope with grief. Finding a healthy strategy that one is most comfortable with can aid in positively recovering from the loss of a loved one.