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Gender relations are the way in which a group, culture or society defines rights, characteristics and responsibilities. Gender relations intersect and influence social relations like age, ethnicity, race, religion and many more. It also can be the way a person is expected to act. For example, a person might be expected to talk, walk, dress or react a certain way.

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Mullah suggested to Nana that Mariam should attend school and she responded with, "there is only one, only one skill a woman like you and me needs in life , and they don't teach it in school." (pg18) Nana didn't even think about letting her go. Mullah just wanted her to be able to have a good education. He talked to Mariam about it and she wanted to go too. She wanted to have an education and get to experience having friends and attending school.

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Jalils wives want to find a suitor for Mariam because they want to get rid of their husband's mistake. Jalil agrees to marry her off because he doesn't want Mariam to get hurt by his cruel wives. He is ashamed of Mariam and he wants to maintain his "good name". Fifteen-year old Mariam then had to marry forty-year old Rasheed, while her two half sisters are both fifteen and get to go to school. It upset Mariam to know he was just sending her off. "It did not escape Mariam that no mention was made of her half sisters Saideh or Naheed, both with plans to enroll in Kabul University." pg47

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After Mariam gets sent off to marry Rasheed, she is made to wear a burqa. He requires her to wear a burqa before it becomes a law. Rasheed wants full control over her. He tells her she has to wear it because "a woman's face, is her husband's business only." (pg.83) After handing her the burqa he tells her about all the women that come to his shoe shop wearing short skirts and makeup.

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While Mariam was cleaning Rasheed's room she got curious and decided to start searching through his belongings. When she opened the drawer she automatically saw a gun. She was shocked to find that, but she assumed it was for protection. Then, she kept looking and found some magazines filled with pictures of naked women. She was a little upset about finding the magazines because she suddenly started to overthink every thing Rasheed had told her about a man respecting their woman. She realized that when he said "A woman's face, is her husbands business only." (pg 83) he was lying.

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Rasheed abused Mariam physically and mentally, but he put her through a lot mentally. He got to her head so many times. Mariam would not let him see that he was hurting her because she did not want it to be any worse. Rasheed did not care about Mariam at all. He put her through an extreme amount of miscarriages. He did not care bout her well being all he wanted her for was a baby. Rasheed could not feel the pain Mariam was going through. Rasheed does not want her after he finds out she can not give him what he wants. Mariam feels as if it is her fault and she feels guilty.

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Rasheed physically abused Mariam multiple times. Mariam could never please him. He was always upset with her. He made her feel like she was never enough. one time in the story Mariam had cooked Rasheed rice and he said it was under cooked. He was very upset with her. She did not deserve the things he said and done to her. “His powerful hands clasped her jaw. He shoved two fingers into her mouth and pried it open, then forced the cold, hard pebbles into it. Mariam struggled against him, mumbling, but he kept kept pushing the pebbles in” (104).

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The things that happened in the book "A Thousand Splendid Suns" connect to the life that women today could live. Some men may treat their wives bad. Also some children may get sent off to marry. Not all women live a perfect life. Some women's husband's may get upset with them and think it's their fault for having a miscarriage. Some women may also get treated like slaves. There are many things that could make a connection with today's society.

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Gender relations is a theme that went on quite a bit throughout the story. Men treated women so poorly. The women did not treat the men wrong. They did not abuse them, yell at them, or make them feel like they were in the wrong. However men did not care about their wives feelings. They wanted them to be their slave. Men and Women were completely different. Most, if not all the time women had no say so. Everything was up to the men. The way they dress, the places they go, the food they cook, and so forth. This was a crazy book that made me realize women have it a lot easier these days.