# data[].attributes.body
If you are struggling with managing

your child's behaviour please let us

know and someone will let you know

what we can offer.

Call your local Family Hub

Or Complete referral form and

comment you would like someone to

call you about the workshop. Click

here: nland.cc/fhreg

ALSO SEE CHILD'S MENTAL HEALTH

SECTION FOR MORE SERVICES FOR

OLDER CHILDREN

# data[].attributes.body
Adolescence is the second most rapid

period of brain development after the

first few years of life. Teenage brains

are reshaped in this period, and

hormonal and developmental changes

have a natural impact on how young

people feel about their world as well

as how they express themselves.

Understanding your teenager's brain

can help you to understand and read

their behaviours and how you might

best support them in this critical

period. The relationship you share

remains one of the most important for

nurturing their wellbeing and helping

them to thrive as kind, sociable and

resilient people throughout their lives.

Click here or go to inourplace.co.uk.

Use Code HADRIAN to get free

access

# data[].attributes.body
Child criminal exploitation

Child criminal exploitation “occurs where an individual or group takes advantage of an imbalance in power to coerce, manipulate or deceive a child into taking part in… criminal activity, in exchange for something the victim needs or wants, and/or for the financial advantage or increased status of the perpetrator or facilitator and/or through violence or the threat of violence.”

“They may still have been criminally exploited even if the activity appears to be something they have agreed or consented to.”

# data[].attributes.headline
Criminal Exploitation Video - County Lines

# data[].attributes.subject
Criminal Exploitation Video - County Lines

# data[].attributes.body
Child exploitation is when someone uses a child for financial gain, sexual gratification, labour or personal advantage.

Using cruel and violent treatment to force a child to take part in criminal or sexual activities often leads to physical and emotional harm to the child, to the detriment of their physical and mental health, education, and moral or social development.

“The exploitation of children can take a number of different forms and perpetrators may subject children and young people to multiple forms of abuse at the same time, such as criminal exploitation (including county lines) and sexual exploitation.”

# data[].attributes.body
Northumberland County Council has partnered with the Solihull Approach to sponsor FREE online courses developed by psychologists and professionals.

These courses are designed to help you understand your child’s feelings, as well as focus on your own feelings as you go through life as a family. You will also learn to understand the changes in your child’s development and how to make the most out of each relationship.

We wholeheartedly recommend these courses – they are for everyone, for everyday parenting. They don’t tell you how to parent, that’s up to you. Instead, they give you a framework for understanding what might be going on and space to think about how you want to respond.

# data[].attributes.body
https://solihullapproachparenting.com/online-courses-northumberland/

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.provider_name
Solihull Approach | Parenting - We're all about emotional health and wellbeing!

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
Online Courses | Northumberland - Solihull Approach | Parenting

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
Online courses: SOLIHULL APPROACH FREE Online courses for residents of Northumberland Northumberland County Council has partnered with the Solihull Approach to sponsor FREE online courses developed by psychologists and professionals.

# data[].attributes.body
Solihull Approach online courses for parents, parents-to-be, carers, grandparents and teens!

(FREE) Understanding the impact of the pandemic on your teenager

(FREE) Understanding the impact of the pandemic on your child

1a. Understanding pregnancy, labour, birth and your baby

2. Understanding your baby

3a. Understanding your child

3b. Understanding your child with additional needs

4. Understanding your teenager's brain

5. Understanding your brain (for teenagers only!)

6. Understanding your feelings (for teenagers only!)

7. Understanding your child's feelings (a taster course)

8. Understanding your child's mental health and wellbeing (accompanies 3a and/or 3b)

9. Understanding your relationships

Urdu: 1. حمل، درد زہ، پیدائش اور آپ کے بچے کی تفہیم (Understanding pregnancy, labour, birth and your baby)

Urdu: 2. اپنے بچے کو سمجھنا (Understanding your baby)

Urdu: 3. اپنے بچے کو سمجھنا (Understanding your child)

Urdu: 4. اپنے نو عمر بچے کے دماغ کو سمجھنا (Understanding your teenager's brain)

Polish: 3. Zrozumieć swoje dziecko (Understanding your child)

Modern Standard Arabic: 1. فهم الحمل والمخاض والولادة وطفلك (Understanding pregnancy, labour, birth and your baby)

^Modern Standard Arabic: 2 افهم طفلك الرضيع (Understanding your baby)

Modern Standard Arabic: 3. فهم أطفالكم (Understanding your child)

Simplified Chinese: 3. 认识您的孩子 (Understanding your child)

Somali: 3. Fahanka ilmahaaga (Understanding your child)

Modern Standard Arabic: 4. افهم دماغ المراهق (Understanding your teenager's brain)

Bulgarian: 3. Как да разбирате детето си (Understanding your child)

Polish: 1. Zrozumieć ciążę, poród, narodziny i Twoje dziecko (Understanding pregnancy, labour, birth and your baby)

(FREE) Understanding your preterm or sick baby in hospital

(FREE) Understanding your preterm or sick baby now you're home

1b. Understanding pregnancy, labour, birth and your baby: for women couples

# data[].attributes.body
Growing up in today's world means that teens are even more tempted than ever to try alcohol and drugs due to the accessibility of these products. Honest, open discussions with your teen about alcohol can help support decisions and create safety plans so that this can be done in a safe manner. Ideally though, it is best to encourage your teens to stay away from drugs.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
It can sometimes be difficult to find out what support is available in your local area, or to know how to talk to professionals about what’s going on for your child.

Parents in similar situations have found that these four things can help:

1. Make a note of your concerns

2. Follow up after appointments

3. Explore other options while you're on a waiting list

4. Talk to other parents

# data[].attributes.body
If somebody physically hurts you, or verbally abuses you, that’s bullying.

Bullying can be a one-off or it can go on for a long time. And bullying can happen to anyone.

# data[].attributes.body
homophobic bullying based on your sexual orientation

racist bullying because of your skin colour or ethnicity

religious bullying because of your beliefs or faith.

sizeist bullying referring to your body size

sexist bullying focusing on you being of the opposite sex

cyberbullying targeting you online, often anonymously

bullying because you are different

# data[].attributes.body
If your child is anxious about school, or they are unable to go to school, YoungMinds have advice on supporting them and working with the school and other services.

It’s normal for children and young people to feel worried about something that’s happening at school – for example, when starting a new school or during exams. Sometimes, however, school can become challenging, stressful or distressing over a much longer period of time.

If your child is feeling anxious about school, or not able to go, it can be exhausting for both of you. Mornings in particular can become really stressful for the whole family, as you try to juggle your child’s feelings alongside the need to get them to school and get on with your other responsibilities such as work. Even if you manage to get your child to the school gate, you might know how difficult they’re going to find the day – or know that you’ll be facing the same problem tomorrow morning.

School Anxiety and Refusal | Parent Guide to Support | YoungMinds

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.readable_text
It's normal for children and young people to feel worried about something that's happening at school - for example, when starting a new school or during exams. Sometimes, however, school can become challenging, stressful or distressing over a much longer period of time.

If your child is feeling anxious about school, or not able to go, it can be exhausting for both of you. Mornings in particular can become really stressful for the whole family, as you try to juggle your child's feelings alongside the need to get them to school and get on with your other responsibilities such as work. Even if you manage to get your child to the school gate, you might know how difficult they're going to find the day - or know that you'll be facing the same problem tomorrow morning.

If you're in this situation, we've got advice to help you explore what's going on with your child, make changes at school that can help, and find the support you need if your child can't go to school.

Young people can feel anxious about school for lots of different reasons. They might be worried about making friends or fitting in, find schoolwork or lessons confusing, feel pressured to learn in a certain way or find their relationships with teachers difficult.

Sometimes, going through difficult experiences outside of school - such as bereavement, an illness in the family or being a young carer - can also make it harder for a child to feel settled at school.

For some young people, the school environment isn't right for them, and trying to fit into it can create a huge amount of stress. This might be the case if they are struggling with their mental health, or have a neurodiverse condition or Special Educational Need (SEN) such as autism, ADHD, dyslexia or dyspraxia. This can make the school environment anxiety-provoking and exhausting, especially if their condition or need is undiagnosed or not being well supported.

Young people might show they're feeling anxious about school by:

not wanting to get up and get ready

saying they can't go

worrying a lot about small issues, such as having the right equipment for a lesson

feeling sick, or having stomach aches or headaches

not sleeping well

not doing schoolwork, or their grades dropping

being angry or upset, or acting out - at school or at home

withdrawing - seeming low, quiet or depressed

It's often difficult for your child to articulate the problem. They may be in a heightened state of stress and not know why or feel able to explain. Your child probably wants to feel able to be in school, just as much as you want them to be there. In many cases it just doesn't feel possible.

Sometimes it can be difficult to work out what's making your child feel anxious, and the first step is often helping them to identify exactly what's worrying them. Once you understand the problem, you'll be in a much better position to make changes that can help.

Young people can find it hard to explain what's causing their feelings, and might not be able to answer direct questions like 'what's going on?' Using an anxiety iceberg can help to open up the conversation - giving you a more relaxed way of exploring together what's causing their anxiety.

Watch our video to find out how to make an anxiety iceberg with your child.

If you're making an anxiety iceberg with younger children, you might want to draw images on the iceberg, or encourage them to write simple words. With older children and teenagers, you can ask them to write key words and phrases on the iceberg, or do this as a mind map, with 'school' in the middle and all the things they're finding difficult around the outside.

Through this exercise, you might identify worries such as arriving at school, finding the environment noisy or overwhelming, finding lessons confusing, feeling lonely through the day, or feeling uncomfortable during specific subjects.

Once you understand what's going on for your child, you can use their anxiety iceberg or mind map to communicate with the school and ask for specific changes.

Follow these steps to start a conversation with the school:

Here are some examples of things you can ask the school for:

Remember that even though this situation can be really tough for you and your child, it's a good idea to maintain a positive relationship with the school. Recognise the support they're offering and any changes they're making. This will help you work together to make things better for your child.

Building a relationship with the attendance team at my son's school was hugely helpful, we were talking with them each day.

If your child isn't going to school at the moment, it might feel incredibly stressful and tiring. You might be worried about when they will be able to get back to school or the impact on their education. Or you might feel overwhelmed because you're juggling this alongside work and other family commitments. Things are probably feeling tough for your child too.

During this time, it's important to keep working with teachers and other staff to try strategies that can help your child get back to school. Keep encouraging them to take achievable steps towards attending too. When the right support is in place, it's often easier for a young person to get back into their usual routine if they can return to school as quickly as possible.

If your child's anxiety about school has built up to the point where they can't go, it's a good idea to get them some professional mental health or SEN support. Find out how to do this further down the page.

Alongside requesting professional help, try to:

The school's SEN and attendance policies should be on their website. Knowing what these are can support you during meetings with the school.

This can help if your child is unable to go to school for a longer period of time and you need to ask for more support, including provision of alternative full-time education.

Encourage your child to get up, do some studying and stop for lunch at the same times they would if they were in school. This will make adapting back to school easier. Explain to your child that if they cannot go to school, they will need to study at home - at least until alternative arrangements are put in place. Ask the school to help you facilitate tasks and activities your child can do and use online resources such as BBC Bitesize.

Not going to school could leave your child feeling really isolated. Make sure they stay connected to the outside world by seeing friends and family, doing activities they enjoy and getting outside for walks and exercise.

Speaking to friends online can be really important if your child is feeling isolated at home. Sometimes, however, you might notice that your child is spending lots of time gaming or on their phone, and that this is getting in the way of important daily activities like spending quality time with family, learning, or sleeping and eating well. If this is becoming a problem, have a look at our guide to gaming or guide to social media for more information and advice.

Local authorities must provide alternative education if a child of compulsory school age is unable to attend school over a longer period of time. If your child cannot attend school because of a mental or physical health issue, the local authority should provide an alternative as soon as it is clear that they will be away from school for more than 15 days (either consecutively or over time). Find out how to request alternative education.

Getting back to school after weeks or months may feel extremely difficult for your child, but you and the school can help make it more manageable. Here are some things you can do to help:

Set small, achievable targets, such as visiting the building outside school hours or attending one lesson.

Request a home visit from a school staff member so your child can check in while feeling safe, see that the school cares and discuss any strategies that might help them.

Ask for a reduced timetable, with regular reviews to discuss building back up at a manageable rate.

Discuss changing classes or sets if your child thinks this would help.

Focus on qualifications needed for what your child wants to do next, perhaps dropping a less relevant GCSE to reduce stress.

My son wasn't questioned about his absence when he did feel able to pop in for favourite lessons, helping to ease him back into full days of education.

If your child is struggling with anxiety and it's affecting their day-to-day life, learning or relationships, it's a good idea to find some professional support. Speaking to the GP and finding them a counsellor or therapist are two good places to start. You can find more information about GPs, counsellors and other mental health services in our guide to getting support from mental health services.

If there is no other obvious reason for your child's inability to attend school, they may have an undiagnosed Special Educational Need (SEN) such as dyslexia, autism or ADHD.

If you think this is the case:

Speak to the school's SENCO or your GP to ask for a referral for an assessment.

While you are waiting for an assessment, you can also ask the SENCO to refer your child for support from other professionals, such as an Educational Psychologist or Speech and Language Therapist. These professionals can identify specific needs and make recommendations for additional support the school can put in place - even if your child hasn't had a formal diagnosis yet.

SEN support at school
If your child is diagnosed with SEN, extra support and adjustments should be put in place at school to help them attend and learn. This is called SEN support, and should be available within the school's existing resources. Speak to the school's SENCO in the first instance about how the school will support your child.
Education, Health and Care (EHC) plans
If you do not think your child's needs can be met by the school's existing resources, you can ask the local authority to carry out an Education, Health and Care needs assessment (EHC needs assessment). If the local authority decides your child needs additional support, they will then make an Education, Health and Care plan (EHC plan). This outlines how the extra support they need will be provided. Find out more about EHC plans.
Your Local Offer
Your Local Offer is the information, support and services available for young people with SEN, and for their parents and families. You can find out what support is available in your area by going to your local authority's website and searching for their Local Offer.

While we take care to ensure that the organisations we signpost to provide high quality information and advice, we cannot take responsibility for any specific pieces of advice they may offer. We encourage parents and carers to always explore the website of a linked service or organisation to understand who they are and what support they offer before engaging with them.

We have more tips and advice on supporting your child with school, and information about how you can get in touch with our Parents Helpline.
This page was reviewed in December 2022. It was created with parents and carers with lived experience of supporting their child or young person with school anxiety. We will next review the page in 2025. YoungMinds is a proud member of PIF TICK - the UK's quality mark for trusted health information.
Whether you love the page or think something is missing, we appreciate your feedback. It all helps us to support more young people with their mental health.

Please be aware that this form isn't a mental health support service. If your child is in crisis right now and you want to talk to someone urgently, find out who to contact on our urgent help page.

At YoungMinds we take your privacy seriously. If you'd like to read more about how we keep the information we collect safe, take a look at our privacy policy.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
School Anxiety and Refusal | Parent Guide to Support

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
If your child is anxious about school, or refusing to go to school at all, read our tips and advice on how you can support their mental health.

# data[].attributes.body
If your child is struggling and they are currently going to school or college, it can help to be open with the school about what’s going on and what support your child needs.

You can do this by getting in touch with any member of school staff – such as their class teacher, form tutor, head of year, the SENCO (the school’s coordinator for special educational needs support), or a member of the pastoral team.

It may be important to make sure your child has some control over the information that’s shared about them at school – for example by discussing with them who they would feel most comfortable for you to speak to in the first instance.

# data[].attributes.body
CPVA is defined as “Any harmful act or behaviour by a child aged 10-18yrs, whether physical, psychological, emotional or financial towards a parent/guardian or carer”. CPVA was previously referred to as Adolescent to Parent Violence and Abuse (APVA).

CPVA is not just a young person being a ‘stroppy teenager’

# data[].attributes.body
CPVA may present as a single violent incident, but is more likely to be a pattern of behaviour including damage to person or property, threats, stealing from the parent, humiliation or verbal abuse.

Child to Parent Violence and Abuse (CPVA) is recognised nationally as an issue which relates to safeguarding both adults and children.

# data[].attributes.body
Relationships are complicated and we all have an internal model of relationships based on our own experiences. Everyone's is different. It is made up of: our relationship with our parents/caregivers, relationships with peers, and childhood experiences. ​

​

This can then go on to impact our future relationships- romantic and friendships and also how we parent.​

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
Teenagers need independence and parents need to help encourage their teens independence as they move into adulthood.​  Parents need to understand the ways that they can encourage their teenagers to be more independent.​

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
Questioning sexual orientation or gender identity can be a normal part of growing up.

It is completely normal for children and young people to question and explore their gender & identity as they grow, change and have new experiences.

# data[].attributes.headline
Experiences that can Impact Children's Ideas about Relationships:

# data[].attributes.subject
Experiences that can Impact Children's Ideas about Relationships:

# data[].attributes.body
​

Abuse- emotional, physical, sexual, neglect (direct or witnessed).​

Loss and bereavement- Changing house, moving schools, loss of an important person, family member or pet.​

Grooming​

Bullying​

Parent Substance Misuse​

Parent Mental Health ​

Emotional availability of parent​

Parent relationship dynamics.

# data[].attributes.body
Growing up can be a tricky time for teens and can come alongside a lot of confusion. It is important to sit down and have honest conversations with your teens, especially around difficult topics such as 'consent'.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.headline
My Child has shared their Sexual Orientation and/or Gender Identity with me...

# data[].attributes.subject
My Child has shared their Sexual Orientation and/or Gender Identity with me...

# data[].attributes.body
Coming out is something the majority of LGBTQIA+ (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans, Queer, Intersex, Asexual plus) people experience in their lifetime. It isn’t just a one off event and many people will feel the need to come out many times.

When or if a LGBTQIA+ person comes out to someone it means that they trust you enough to tell you about their identity. They could be telling you about their sexual orientation (some examples of different sexual orientations are bisexual, gay, lesbian or asexual) or their gender identity (examples of gender identities are; transgender-different from their assigned gender at birth, non-binary-gender non-conforming or gender diverse).

It is different for everyone and if a young person comes out to you then it could be a scary experience for them. What is important to remember is that acceptance for who they are will mean everything to them. You don’t need to know everything about what they are experiencing to be supportive, and it is understandable that you may be wary of saying the wrong thing or not understanding what they are going through. You can show support by thanking them for sharing and if you or your young person need further support there are local as well as regional and national organisations that can help. A positive coming out experience can make all the difference to a child or young person.

# data[].attributes.body
As we know teens go through so many changes in their adolescence and this can be difficult for parents because your child can seem to change overnight.​

As your teens are moving into the world of adulthood it is important to respect their choices, still have boundaries in place but respect their opinion. ​

This is vital when expecting them to respect your choices as a parent.

# data[].attributes.body
A film by Northumberland Domestic Abuse Service.

It's normal to look at the world through rose-tinted glasses in the early stages of a relationship. But for some people, those rose-tinted glasses turn into blinders that keep them from seeing that a relationship isn't as healthy as it should be.

# data[].attributes.body
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LO3i1EJE6DI

# data[].attributes.headline
Practical Tips for Listening to your Teen...

# data[].attributes.subject
Practical Tips for Listening to your Teen...

# data[].attributes.body
​

Create a safe environment.​

Put your phone down.​

Listen to and let your child vent. ​

Be attentive.​

Be aware that your child could be hiding his true feelings out of fear, embarrassment, anxiety, or something else. ​

Listen between the words. ​

Recognise and confess when you don’t have the energy to be a good listener and agree to restart the conversation.​

# data[].attributes.body
Teenagers just need a sounding board, not a solution

Just like we do as adults, they may find the best relief from simply talking to you about their worries and problems. Most problems feel better when they’re spoken about and talked through, rather than kept inside, where they can be made to feel bigger or worse than they are.​

​

Teenagers are looking for empathy.

A lot of teenage worries and concerns can’t actually be solved. We can’t fix the breakdown of their latest romance, intervene in their friendship problems, or do anything about the back-to-back math's and history exams they have next week. But having difficulties is nowhere near as bad as feeling like you're completely alone with them.​

​

Teenagers sometimes just need a a vote of confidence.

It can be difficult for parents not to steam in with suggestions and solutions, but this can communicate to teenagers, that “you can’t fix this problem, but I can”. This can feel to teenagers like a vote of no confidence in their skills and resilience, when often they just want reassurance from you that they’re capable of handling life’s challenges.​

# data[].attributes.body
Mood swings and behaviours could be as a result of depression, anxiety, stress, or worries.​  It is important that your child feels they have a safe space to express their problems.​

As a parent it’s important you stay calm and consistent whatever mood they are in. ​They are much more likely to come to you when there are issues if you can do this.​

​

If your teenager does open up to you, let them lead the conversation and listen to what they have to say ~ without being judgmental.

# data[].attributes.body
Listen very carefully and try to understand where they are coming from. ​This approach has much more power than you realise. ​ Then Repeat their thoughts back.​

​

*It is helpful for teenagers to hear their thoughts and feelings reflected back to them so they can try to solve their own problems.

# data[].attributes.body
​

Do not judge your teenager​

Try not to assume you know what's wrong​

Be clear you want to help​

Be honest ​

Help your teenager think for themselves​

Pick your battles with your teenager​

Try not to react to angry outbursts​

Help your teen to feel safe​

Ask the right questions

# data[].attributes.body
​

It's often said that communication is the key to a healthy relationship.​

​

Effective communication with your ​

teenager can help you both feel happier and more connected in your relationship, and more confident about having difficult conversations and resolving conflicts.​​

# data[].attributes.body
Being a parent is one of the toughest but most rewarding jobs in the world. ​​Sometimes you have to take the good with the bad!

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.headline
Introducing a Balance that Helps Them...

# data[].attributes.subject
Introducing a Balance that Helps Them...

# data[].attributes.body
There are many things that you can do to help your child develop independence:​

Show your child love and support.​

Respect your child’s feelings and opinions.​

Set clear and fair family rules.​

Help your child develop skills for decision-making.​

Give your child opportunities to practise being independent and responsible.​

Work through conflicts constructively.​

# data[].attributes.body
This distance between you and your teen may cause you to feel insecure and frustrated at times ~ They are becoming more independent and responsible, but if may feel like they are growing away from you.

# data[].attributes.body
When in a relationship, it's a sign of verbal, emotional, or physical abuse if they;

Get angry when they don't drop everything for him or her?​​

Criticize the way they look or dress, and say they'll never be able to find anyone else?​​

Stop me from seeing friends or from talking to other guys or girls?​​

Want me to quit an activity, that I really enjoy​​

Raise a hand when angry, they may hit out.​​

Force them to go further sexually .​​

# data[].attributes.body
Here are some courses that are delivered across Northumberland.  Please click on you local area to find out what is available to you, in your area.

Courses may run virtually or within a building, you may be part of a wider group with other parents and carers.

# data[].attributes.body
Add 'At a glance booklet' to the pathway groups and the request for service link.

# data[].attributes.body
Anti-social behaviour is described as behaviour that may not always be a crime but behaviour that can cause harassment, alarm and distress to a community or actions that may have an impact on people’s quality of life. Some examples of anti-social behaviour include shouting, swearing, fighting, harassment, criminal damage. It is important as a parent that you tackle this at the earliest point. Below are some useful resources and information to support you in tackling that behaviour.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
Every child is unique and as a result grow up to be completely different with their own personalities. Children raised in the same household can grow up to be completely different to one another in terms of interests and personalities. Likewise, people born and raised in completely different households can grow up to have remarkably similar personalities.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.headline
What is not anti-social behaviour? (ASB) - need to finish

# data[].attributes.subject
What is not anti-social behaviour? (ASB) - need to finish

# data[].attributes.body
It is important to understand what is and what is not anti-social behaviour, young people are perceived as being the main perpetrators of ASB however, it is important to understand the distinction between typical teenage behaviours and nuisance...

Young people playing in the streets is not classes as anti-social behaviour.

Young people congregating in groups

Young people playing football in the street

# data[].attributes.body
If we are always -

Permissive: Children will grow to have a lack of self discipline, poor social skills, be demanding, insecure and unaware of boundaries.

Uninvolved: Children will struggle with emotional skills, social skills and attachment.

Authoritarian: Children will have low self esteem and poor social skills.

Authoritative: Children will be independent, self reliant, well behaved and less likely to engage in ASB.

# data[].attributes.headline
Advice and Guidance for the Public around ASB

# data[].attributes.subject
Advice and Guidance for the Public around ASB

# data[].attributes.body
If your child is struggling with their mental health and needs some support, you may be feeling really worried as a parent. Talking to your child about their mental health can be incredibly tough, you may feel that you do not know what to do, say or how to act. Remember that you and your child are not alone. Below are some helpful resources to help you as a parent have those difficult conversations.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
https://www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/articles/zy3yf82?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=mental-health

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.readable_text
According to charity The Mental Health Foundation, mental health problems affect around one in six children and include things like depression, anxiety and conduct disorder (a type of behavioural problem). The charity says eating disorders and self-harm also commonly occur in children.
A Parents' Toolkit opinion poll, commissioned in partnership with parenting website Netmums, revealed that nearly 1 in 3 parents have noticed a deterioration in their child's mental health over the 6 months before being polled and while 50% of parents would ask a health practitioner/teacher or other qualified expert for help - of the respondents who said their child has experienced challenges with their mental health - 37% said " I have experienced barriers in seeking help for my mental health issue in my child.

How you can support your child's mental health

1. What to do when you're concerned about your child's mental health

You may have noticed changes in your child - changes of mood, altered sleeping patterns, withdrawal from family life and/or friendship groups. These could be signs that they're experiencing anxiety or other issues around their mental health.

If you're concerned about your child's mental health, you can speak to their school or GP. The GP may refer your child to Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS), which provides specialist care from psychologists, psychiatrists, nurses and social workers. Between 2020-2021 the average wait for mental health services in England was more than two months.

Here are some things you can do whilst you and your child are waiting to access these services.

- Keep speaking to your GP

Your GP will be able to regularly listen to your child, discuss your own concerns and suggest local services that may be of help. Don't be afraid of going back to your GP if you feel you need more support and advice.

- Speak to your child's school

Arrange to meet the pastoral team at your child's school, or encourage your child to seek out and speak to them. They might be able to help make school easier or less pressured for your child.

- Look into local services

Local charities can be a good source of support. Search online for nearby support groups and charities. Alternatively, national mental health charity Chasing the Stigma runs the ' Hub of Hope ' website, which allows you to search easily for local mental health charities.

- Try and stay healthy

Where possible, try and encourage your child (and your whole family) to eat healthily, get some exercise and a good night's sleep. If they're having trouble sleeping, gentle activities like reading, walking or drawing and art may help them to relax.

2. What to do in a mental health emergency

According to the NHS, a mental health emergency is when your child feels like they may seriously harm themselves or someone else, they feel suicidal or are in extreme distress. There are different services you can access, depending on the severity of the situation. They are listed below from less severe to the most severe scenario.

If your child is under 19 and needs to talk to someone, they can call Childline on 0800 1111. Or they can text YM to 85258 for free 24/7 support. You can also call the YoungMinds parents helpline.

Call a local NHS urgent mental health line

These helplines in England are free and can offer 24-hour advice and support for your child. You can speak to a mental health professional about your child and get an assessment to help decide on the best course of care. In Scotland NHS24 has links to services, while people in Wales can access these helplines and in Northern Ireland there is Lifeline. To find one local to you, type 'local urgent mental health' into your search engine.

If you cannot speak to your local NHS urgent mental health helpline or you're unsure what to do, call 111. This number is for when you urgently need help for your child's mental health, but it isn't an emergency. You may be able to ask for an emergency appointment or speak to a mental health nurse over the phone.

If your child or someone else's life is at risk, call 999. For example, if they've taken an overdose or seriously injured themselves, or if you don't feel you can keep yourself, your child or someone else safe.

This is really important. The NHS website states: "A mental health emergency should be taken as seriously as a physical one. You will not be wasting anyone's time."

3. General tips for helping your child through a mental health crisis

Try to remain calm and positive with your child. Remember to be kind to yourself too - if you do lose your patience, apologise to your child and forgive yourself. Every child is different so you'll need to tailor your actions depending on the age of your child and their particular circumstances.

Keep everyday routines going where possible. Be realistic about what you can achieve. Talk to your child and agree with them about how best to let the important people in your child's life know what is happening with them.

Keep it simple, a day at a time in manageable steps, so today is better than yesterday. Focus on what helps and avoid what doesn't. Try and stick to the plan, making sensible changes as you go along. Make a plan for emergencies too, so that you all know what to do if it's needed.

It's important to listen to your child, rather than necessarily offering advice. Follow your child's lead and encourage them to share so that they know you really understand. Speaking less and listening more helps you understand how your child feels, and helps them know you realise what they're going through.

Take care of your own wellbeing so that you can be there for your child, especially when everyone is having a hard time. Talk to other adults about your worries and frustrations, but try not to overshare with your kids.

For more advice on looking after your family's mental health, there are some useful tips in this series of animations Families Under Pressure, developed by King's College London, South London and Maudsley NHS Foundation Trust and The Maudsley Charity.

There are other helplines, textlines and online services available that you and your child can look at together:
This article was published in October 2021

More from BBC Bitesize Parents' Toolkit...

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
Mental health first aid kit for parents: Who to ask and what to do

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
If your child needs help with their mental health, here are some tips from our parents' mental health first aid kit to help you access professional help and support your child.

# data[].attributes.body
Padlets are great resources as they make the perfect one stop shop for all the information you require. Check out the padlets below for further information on a specific area.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
https://nlandeducation.padlet.org/gill_finch2/SORTED

# data[].attributes.body
https://padlet.com/nies1/EHENorthumberland

# data[].attributes.body
https://padlet.com/ncmh/zascdo51alseo47n

# data[].attributes.body
The internet is and can be a fantastic resource for all ages which provides information and entertainment alike. However, there can also be a dark side to this and it is important to be aware of the signs and know what to look out for when keeping your child safe on the internet.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
Adolescence (the teenage years) is a time for growth spurts and puberty changes.
Growth spurts may result in a growth of several inches over a couple of months and then nothing for a short time or vice versa.
Puberty will see your child go through physical changes as a result of hormonal changes in the body. These changes can occur at different times in different children.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
Many people believe that human brains are fully developed by the time a young person reaches 13 (the teenage years). However, this is not the case! Throughout the teenage years, unused connections in the thinking and processing part of the brain are 'pruned' away. Meanwhile, other connections are strengthened - helping the brain to become more efficient.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
Sleep is an essential function in everybody's life as it provides time for our body and mind to recharge - helping us to feel refreshed and alert. Sleep helps to keep our bodies healthy and allows our brain to function properly throughout the day.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
Being a teenager can be hard, and parenting one can be just as tricky! This padlet aims to provide you will all of the information you need to help you understand what your teenager is going through as well some strategies and advice to help them along the way.

Last updated: 25/04/23

# data[].attributes.body
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dLuEY6jN6gY

# data[].attributes.body
Notice any changes in our children's behaviour

Communication is essential, especially listening

Check age limits.  Have parental controls and privacy settings, spending limits and passwords.  Set age restrictions for Netflix and YouTube to restrict content available. (Use net-aware.org - will tell you official age rating and what young people use each app for.  It will also give it a rating of how safe the app is for young people and tips on how to stay safe online.)

Limit time spent on screens and encourage activities away from screens!

Teach them how to stay safe online – not to give out personal info and what to do if something goes wrong online. (Don’t use scare tactics - e.g telling them a scary video is circulating TikTok.  Research shows this doesn’t stop young people looking and in fact makes them more curious).

Listen to the apps they talk about and find out more about them online.  Find out about new apps.

Be aware of online grooming and online bullying that may take place and know where to go for support (Think U Know, School, Early Help Worker, Police).

# data[].attributes.body
1. Noise
2. Stress, anxiety, worries
3. Exam stress
4. Friendship worries
5. Insomnia
6. Night terrors
7. Blue light- gaming, television and phone.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
What is Puberty? Decoding Puberty in Girls

# data[].attributes.headline
Information, advice and guidance - Talking to your child about sex

# data[].attributes.subject
Information, advice and guidance - Talking to your child about sex

# data[].attributes.body
Establish a realistic bedtime and stick to it every night, even on the weekends.

Maintain comfortable temperature settings and low light levels in your bedroom.

Keep a comfortable sleep environment by ensuring you have the best mattress, best pillows, and best sheets for your sleep preferences and body type.

Consider a “screen ban” on televisions, computers and tablets, cell phones, and other electronic devices in your bedroom.

Abstain from caffeine, alcohol, and large meals in the hours leading up to bedtime.

Refrain from using tobacco at any time of day or night.

Exercise during the day; this can help you wind down in the evening and prepare for sleep.

# data[].attributes.body
​

​To help you cope with the emptiness that you may be feeling, focus on non-parenting activities that you find fulfilling.
​

You should do things that make you happy like going for a walk, reading a good book, seeing a movie with a friend, or  joining a group.

# data[].attributes.headline
Additional  Resources for Parents & Teens

# data[].attributes.subject
Additional  Resources for Parents & Teens

# data[].attributes.body
https://www.youngminds.org.uk/

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
YoungMinds | Mental Health Charity For Children And Young People

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
YoungMinds are a mental health charity for children, young people and their parents, making sure all young people can get the mental health support they need.

# data[].attributes.headline
Apps Parents Should Know About! (Insert Image)

# data[].attributes.subject
Apps Parents Should Know About! (Insert Image)

# data[].attributes.body
https://padlet.com/ncmh/zascdo51alseo47n

# data[].attributes.body
​

Communication is key- you won't be able to monitor everything your teens do online but you can take safety measures such as parental controls and have disussions about how to keep themselves safe online and what to do if they feel at risk.​

Set an example- if you want your teen to spend less time online, make a joint or family contract and be prepared to set a good example, by taking time out from your phone as well.​

Try and get a knowledge of the Apps your teen is using and make sure that you have boundaries in place to keep them safe such as: limited time on devices, where they can use devices, only adding friends they know.​

# data[].attributes.body
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yvw7QGytgNQ

# data[].attributes.headline
Advice and Guidance to the Public around ASB continued

# data[].attributes.subject
Advice and Guidance to the Public around ASB continued

# data[].attributes.body
Family hubs provide families with a single access point to integrated family support services for early help with social, emotional, physical and financial needs. Each family hub is bespoke to its local community while incorporating three key delivery principles: access, connection, relationships. Family hubs provide support to families from conception until the age of 19 (or 25 for young people with special educational needs and disabilities).

# data[].attributes.body
It is illegal to give contraception to under 16's?

False

Contraception services are free and confidential, including for people under the age of 16. If you're under 16 and want contraception, the doctor, nurse or pharmacist won't tell your parents or carer, as long as they believe you fully understand the information you're given and the decisions you're making.

A child under the age of 13 cannot give legal consent to sexual activity?

True

According to the Sexual offences act 2003 Under 13’s are deemed unable to consent to sex. So, it’s irrelevant whether or not the child consented to the act - it is still an offence.

The age of consent for gay men and women is 18

False

16 for both. From January 2001 the age of consent became equal for gay men, lesbians and heterosexuals. The age of consent for all is 16 in England, Wales and Scotland, Northern Ireland (from 2009). In 1967 the age of consent for gay men was set at 21 and in 1994 lowered to 18. During this time there was no age of consent relating to lesbians

Two 15 year old's who are engaged in consensual sexual activity are breaking the law.

True

However, there are different degrees of criminality in sexual situations – creating a grey area in terms of the law. For example, two 15-year-old teenagers who have sex with each other just weeks before their 16th birthdays are much less likely to be prosecuted than a 25-year-old man who has sex with a 15-year-old girl.

# data[].attributes.body
Family Lives is a resource for parents to get information, advice and guidance

https://www.familylives.org.uk/

# data[].attributes.body
Mental health support for parents:

https://www.tmnorthumberland.org.uk/

https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/nhs-voluntary-charity-services/nhs-services/how-to-access-mental-health-services/

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/mental-health-problems-introduction/support-services/

https://www.time-to-change.org.uk/mental-health-and-stigma/help-and-support

https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/getting-help

# data[].attributes.headline
Self Care ~ what Will You Make Time For?

# data[].attributes.subject
Self Care ~ what Will You Make Time For?

# data[].attributes.body
Further reading and advice:

www.internetmatters.org.uk

www.NSPCC.org.uk

www.Thinkyouknow.co.uk

www.CEOP.police/safety_centre

www.nationalonlinesafety.com

https://www.internetmatters.org/schools-esafety/parent-online-support-pack-teachers/

https://www.childnet.com/resources/online-safety-activities-you-can-do-from-home/for-7-11-year-olds/

Check the age that your children have said that they are on Facebook and other sites, as if they put incorrect age at some point, they may be 18 on fb (when not really) and see inappropriate content

Useful information:
-CEOP – child exploitation and online protection

Click Ceop if you want to report something online – you cannot remain anonymous.

CEOP does not deal with bullying – report bullying to NSPCC - Net aware.  NSPCC site NET AWARE will give you information on Apps

-Sexting – Under 18ys it is breaking the law if sending sexual images to others

# data[].attributes.body
https://www.northumberland.gov.uk/Children/Northumberland-Local-Offer-SEND-0-to-25-years/Preparing-for-adulthood/Friendships-and-Relationships.aspx

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
'Tricky Friends' - Northumberland Safeguarding Adults

# data[].attributes.headline
Support Available from the following Services;

# data[].attributes.subject
Support Available from the following Services;

# data[].attributes.body
Pride Action North

You can call/email for support to young people and adults who identify as LGBTQIA+ or questioning their sexual orientation or gender identity. Pride Action North are based in Ashington but work across Northumberland and surrounding areas and can help in the following ways;

· one off chats with members of their wellbeing staff team,

· 1-1 support to family members and young people,

· counselling services

· social events

· youth groups

· Inclusivity training to businesses and schools

Human Kind

Provide Young people who identify as LGBTQIA+ in the North East with practical support and advice LGBT+ North East – Humankind (humankindcharity.org.uk)

Barnardo’s Positive Identities Service

The Barnardo’s Positive Identities Service provides support to children, young people, families and professionals around sexuality and gender identity. We work with young people who identify as Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans, and other related identities (LGBT+), those who may be questioning their gender identity and/or sexuality, and their families and other professionals supporting them, empowering them to support young people with their identity. Barnardo's Positive Identities Service – Supporting LGBTQ+ children, young people and their families.

Gender Identity Development Service

The Gender Identity Development Service (GIDS) is a highly specialised clinic for young people presenting with difficulties with their gender identity. The website provides advice and signposting, as well as details of how to get referred into the services. About us - Gender Identity Development Service (gids.nhs.uk)

Think2Speak

Think2Speak is a national organisation however run online support groups as well as WhatsApp groups to support families and young people across the UK LGBTQ Support for Families I Safe Spaces to Talk and Share — Think2Speak CIC

Mermaids

Mermaids supports transgender, non-binary and gender-diverse children and young people, as well as their families and professionals involved in their care.

Kooth

Kooth is a national organisation that is a free, confidential mental health support service designed to support individuals, particularly young people, in managing their mental well-being. Offering 24/7 access to online counselling, self-help resources, and peer support, Kooth helps users navigate through life's challenges with a safe, judgment-free platform. Whether seeking immediate emotional support or looking for guidance through structured self-help tools.

# data[].attributes.headline
Information Advice and Guidance to Help Young People Understand ASB

# data[].attributes.subject
Information Advice and Guidance to Help Young People Understand ASB

# data[].attributes.headline
Information Advice and Guidance to Help Young People Understand ASB continued

# data[].attributes.subject
Information Advice and Guidance to Help Young People Understand ASB continued

# data[].attributes.headline
What to do if your teen is having sex...

# data[].attributes.subject
What to do if your teen is having sex...

# data[].attributes.body
1. Talk to them openly and honestly about it. Show respect and treat them fairly - don't dismiss their feelings.

2. Encourage them to practice safe sex and access contraception.

3. Have a discussion around expectations and boundaries. The importance of consent is a topic which must be discussed

4. Stay calm!

# data[].attributes.body
1. Start to grow taller
2. Begin to grow hair in different places
3. Start to sweat more
4. Have greasier skin
5. Get greasier hair
6. Have an interest in exploring relationships and sexuality
7. Experience the puberty brain (a rollercoaster of emotions and mood swings).

# data[].attributes.body
Even though your teenager thinks they can make grown-up decisions on their own, they can’t.​

​

Your teenager needs you to help them think through all of their decisions and worries and support them to find their own solution.​

​

Don’t worry about being perfect the first time, or every time. You’re human and so is your teen. ​

​

If you’re struggling with a really challenging subject, tackle it in a series of small talks instead of one big one. ​

​

If a conversation gets derailed, take a deep breath – and get back on ​the right track the next time.  ​

​

Remember, build bridges ~ Not walls

# data[].attributes.headline
Advice and Guidance for Parents & Carers around ASB 

# data[].attributes.subject
Advice and Guidance for Parents & Carers around ASB 

# data[].attributes.headline
Advice and Guidance for Parents & Carers around ASB continued

# data[].attributes.subject
Advice and Guidance for Parents & Carers around ASB continued

# data[].attributes.body
https://www.safewise.com/resources/parental-control-filters-buyers-guide/

https://www.techradar.com/uk/best/parental-control

# data[].attributes.body
https://livesafe.org.uk/young-people/knife-crime/