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Welcome to the ADHD+ Support, based in Chelmsford, Essex.  We are charitable organisation with a primary aim of providing information, support and services to those with ADHD and its many associated and co-existing conditions.  We are primarily run by volunteers who have a personal connection with these conditions.

Our work is with those who have or are in the process of obtaining a diagnosis of ADHD, their families, parents/guardians, and professionals, to help find and provide better ways to help cope with the day to day struggles.

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ADHD+ Support, ADHD+ Support, Essex UK, provide support to adults, children and their families with Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder, an Executive Function Disorder, and other related conditions.

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Support for Parents And Carers in Essex.

Our team of Peer Educators are all parents and carers. They all have lived experience of supporting children and young people with special educational needs and disabilities (SEND). They understand the journey and are here to help you navigate it, wherever you are and whatever stage you're at.

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Home | Support for Parents And Carers in Essex

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Autism Central is for families and carers of autistic people and those who support them. Autism Central is a peer support programme co-produced with parents, carers, and autistic people of all ages. We offers families education, coaching, and connection. Through resources, one-to-one peer support, and community events.

From 1 October, Anna Freud is proud to lead the delivery of Autism Central, commissioned by NHS England. Anna Freud is a world-leading mental health charity for children and families that has developed and delivered pioneering mental health care for over 70 years.

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Autism Central for Parents and Carers | Autism Central

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Autism Central offers a wealth of resources for parents, carers and personal assistants of autistic people in England – from articles and learning materials to signposting you to services and support in your local area.

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Essex Child & Family Wellbeing Service- See what the service can offer for children and families.

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A helpful signpost to services created by Essex Family Forum.

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Essex Local SEND Roadshows

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Help for families

We give families the confidence and skills to help their children. If you're concerned about your child's speech and language development, we can help.

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Speech and Language UK: Changing young lives

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Skip to content

We give families the confidence and skills to help their children. If you're concerned about your child's speech and language development, we can help.

We know that it can be hard to know where to start if you are worried about your child's development. If you think your child is having challenges with talking and understanding words, we are here to help you.

Our free resources and services can help with understanding what to look out for, how to get support and even some simple ways you can help your child at home.

Our progress checker will provide short questions you can answer to see how your baby or child is getting on with their talking and understanding of words.

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Help for families - Speech and Language UK: Changing young lives

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We give families the confidence and skills to help their children. Access our free resources and learn more about ways to encourage children's speech and language development.

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ACL Essex offers lots of courses to support parents with different needs. You need to register with ACL to sign up for courses. Some are in person; many are virtual. Upcoming courses include: Upcoming Online Courses:

Family Wellbeing: Starts 24/04/2025, 5 weeks, 19:00 - 21:00

Fussy Eating: 28/04/2025, 12:30 - 14:30

Keeping Safe Online: 28/04/2025, 19:00 - 21:00

Managing Anger In Young People: Starts 15/05/2025, 2 weeks, 09:30 - 11:30

Managing Big Emotions: 30/04/2025, 12:30 - 14:30

Positive Parenting: Starts 22/04/2025, 5 weeks, 19:00 - 21:00

Raising Girls: Starts 24/04/2025, 2 weeks, 09:30 - 11:30

Self-Esteem For Teens: 13/05/2025, 19:00 - 21:00

Sibling Rivalry: 20/05/2025, 19:00 - 21:00

Supporting Your Child - KS1 Homework: 13/05/2025, 19:00 - 21:00

Supporting Your Child To Sleep Better: 01/05/2025, 19:00 - 21:00

Talking So Children Will Listen: 25/04/2025, 12:00 - 14:30

Understanding Children's Anxiety: Starts 08/05/2025, 2 weeks, 10:00 - 12:00

Understanding Teen Stress: 06/05/2025, 19:00 - 21:00

Zones Of Regulation: 29/04/2025, 19:00 - 21:00

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Home: We are the largest provider of adult education in the county. Our aim is to provide learners with as many ways to flourish as possible.

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A link to the SEN Magazine, March-April 2025 issue

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A link to the SEN Magazine, March-April 2025 issue

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A really informative SEN Magazine with some interesting articles. This magazine comes out bi-monthly. This link takes you to the online version of the magazine.

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Music, Performing arts, Literacy, Transition, Down’s syndrome, SEND transport, Alternative provision, Supported holidays, Short breaks, Social anxiety, Driving tests, Outdoor learning, Equine therapy, Rebound therapy, Gatsby benchmarks, Post-16, Books, What’s new, CPD & Events, Resources and more

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What is challenging behaviour, and how the Challenging Behaviour Foundation can help.

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Claire

Malachy

Laura

The 2022 Learning from Lives and Deaths (LeDeR) report, which looks at the deaths of people with a learning disability and autistic people and aims to improve health and care, has been published. We send our condolences to everyone who has lost a loved one.

The government has published the final report by Baroness Hollins on the Independent Care, Education and Treatment Reviews programme, which aimed to move people with a learning disability and autistic people out of long-term segregation, alongside its response to this report

Charities and organisations have written to the Prime Minister about the omission of the Draft Mental Health Bill from the King's Speech

Do you support someone with severe learning disabilities and behaviours that challenge? We can help.

If you are involved in supporting people with severe learning disabilities and behaviours that challenge, we can help.

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Homepage for the Challenging Behaviour Foundation

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The CBF aims to improve the life opportunities and quality of life for people with severe learning disabilities and their families.

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The MAZE Group. Supporting families of children with additional needs.

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Our coffee mornings are free. These are hosted by Colchester Parent Support Group (in Colchester) and North Tendring Parent Support Group (in Harwich and Mistley).

The online content and videos are also free.

The MAZE Parenting Programme and SEND Programme are fully funded by the NHS Clinical Commissioning Group for North East Essex. This means we can offer our groups free of charge but must prioritise those parents whose GP surgeries are located within North East Essex.

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The MAZE Group | SEND Parenting Support Group in Essex

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Supporting families of children with additional needs. A special educational needs & disability (SEND) support group for parenting advice in Essex.

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Check-in with other parents at the MAZE monthly coffee mornings.

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Coffee Mornings | SEND Parents Support - The MAZE Group

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MAZE run special educational needs & disability (SEND) parenting groups with regular coffee mornings around Essex, in Colchester, Clacton & Harwich.

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The MAZE is a unique approach to SEND which offers insights into how children with additional needs experience the world.

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Our coffee mornings are free. These are hosted by Colchester Parent Support Group (in Colchester) and North Tendring Parent Support Group (in Harwich and Mistley).

The online content and videos are also free.

The MAZE Parenting Programme and SEND Programme are fully funded by the NHS Clinical Commissioning Group for North East Essex. This means we can offer our groups free of charge but must prioritise those parents whose GP surgeries are located within North East Essex.

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The MAZE Group | SEND Parenting Support Group in Essex

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Supporting families of children with additional needs. A special educational needs & disability (SEND) support group for parenting advice in Essex.

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A useful sensory awareness toolkit from Essex with some really good interactive links to explain what behaviours you may see, why they may be happening and what can be put in place to help. Proprioception is the word!

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St Peter's is proud to be part of the Multi Schools Council, and our Wellbeing Council attends MSC meetings. We are currently proud to hold the MSC Bronze SEND award and hope to move towards gold!

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Removing barriers, uniting differences, creating equality

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A useful and clear guide to support parents of children with SEND needs.

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Top tips, expert advice and fun activities to help you support your child's wellbeing and learning in a changing world. Parents, we've got you.

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ACL Essex provides a wide range of courses, including courses for supporting children and supporting children with specific needs. They run throughout Essex, in person and online. Many courses run at the Acorn Centre in Halstead, such as Sensory Challenges with Children and Managing Children's Big Emotions. You can create an account and filter your searches for specific classes or ring ACL Essex directly at 0345 603 7635, where you can talk to someone to find out where and how to book. Many of the courses are free and will bring together like-minded people.

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Overview of Local SEND Services: SEND Resource Van

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Overview of Local SEND Services: SEND Resource Van

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The Spectrum: A useful book for children to help explain the autistic spectrum

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The Spectrum: A useful book for children to help explain the autistic spectrum

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Zones of Regulation Activities Pack for Younger Children

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Zones of Regulation Activities Pack for Younger Children

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An introduction to the Zones of Regulation 

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An introduction to the Zones of Regulation 

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This is a useful book to read with children to help them understand their diagnosis and how everyone with a diagnosis is different.

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This is a comprehensive guide to supporting autistic girls written by Yellow Ladybugs.

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Our Autism Central Hubs offer guidance to families, carers and personal assistants of autistic people. All of our sessions are run by Peer Educators. These are parents or carers of autistic people, who are happy to share their knowledge and experience with you. They offer group and one-to-one sessions to help you and other parents and carers find the information and services available in your area. Hubs may also run events such as workshops, drop-in sessions, coffee mornings or virtual meet-ups.

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East of England delivered by Essex County Council

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Our Autism Central Hubs offer guidance to families, carers and personal assistants of autistic people. All of our sessions are run by Peer Educators. These are parents or carers of autistic people, who are happy to share their knowledge and experience with you.

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British Sign Language is the most common form of sign language in the UK. It was recognised as a language in its own right in 2003 and legally as an official language of Britain in 2022. “BSL is my first language; it’s unique as it is a rich and visual language. It can be used […]

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We invite you all to explore SignBank and the
visual language that is British Sign Language (BSL), the language of the Deaf
Community in the United Kingdom.

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British Sign Language - Learn BSL Online

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British Sign Language - Learn BSL Online

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Online BSL course, games, information & resources. Learn British Sign Language today.

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Action on Hearing Loss (formerly RNID) estimates there are 45,000 deaf children in the UK, with many more experiencing temporary hearing loss due conditions such as glue ear. Learning Makaton and/or British Sign Language can help children with special communication and language needs to express themselves and communicate with others.

According to research from The Communication Trust, it is estimated that 10% of all children have long term or persistent speech, language and communication difficulties. This is often known as speech, language and communication needs (SLCN):

7% of children have speech, language and communication difficulties as their main difficulty. This is also referred to as specific language impairment and is often severe and complex. There is no obvious reason or cause for these difficulties with language, although non-verbal skills are often well developed.

3% of children have speech, language and communication difficulties as part of another condition such as autism, hearing impairment, general learning difficulties etc.

Of these 3%, an estimated 1% of children have the most severe and complex speech, language and communication difficulties that prevent them from expressing their basic needs.

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Something Special - Using signs and symbols to communicate

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Action on Hearing Loss (formerly RNID) estimates there are 45,000 deaf children in the UK, with many more experiencing temporary hearing loss due conditions such as glue ear. Learning Makaton and/or British Sign Language can help children with special communication and language needs to express themselves and communicate with others.

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The Essex Local SEND Offer have a Facebook page which can help keep you up to date with the support that is available.
https://www.facebook.com/TheEssexLocalOffer

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Log into Facebook to start sharing and connecting with your friends, family, and people you know.

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40 Books with Positive Views of Disability

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40 Books with Positive Views of Disability

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A really useful guide to supporting your neurodiverse child.

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If your child is routinely waking in the night, it is important that they learn to self-settle rather than seeking a parent or joining a parent's bed. This can be difficult to enforce, and may be emotionally challenging, for both child and parent, but parents should remain firm and assertive.

If your child leaves their bed and seeks you out at night-time, try not to engage them in conversation, but lead them quietly and immediately back to bed. This may need to be repeated several times each night, but it is important that your child learns that they will receive the same response from you each time.

If your child is anxious, the use of a night light, cuddly toy or baby monitor may help them to feel safe and learn how to self-settle.

Praising your child in the morning for staying in bed at night can help reinforce good behaviour; this can be aided by the use of a reward chart or stickers, with a small token prize when a certain number of stickers/rewards have been won.

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Sleep hygiene in children and young people

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This information sheet from Great Ormond Street Hospital (GOSH) explains about sleep hygiene. The lead-up and routine around your child's bedtime is referred to as 'sleep hygiene'. Having good sleep hygiene can help your child both to settle to sleep and

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Support for Parents from Action For Children

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Potty and toilet training - Support for Parents from Action For Children

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Find out about when to start potty and toilet training, coping with potty training, and potty training at night.

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Essex Child and Family Wellbeing Service

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The West Essex Children's Continence Service works with families of children from the age of 4 years to young people up to the age of 18 that are registered with a GP in West Essex and have bowel or bladder problems that have not been able to be managed with the support of the child's health visitor or school nurse.

The aim is to offer support and strategies that allow the child/young person to become completely continent or become as independent with their continence issues as possible.

The service supports the children/young people with bowel and bladder difficulties. This include difficulties with failed toileting (after six months of trying), day time wetting, night time wetting, soiling/overflow and constipation issues.

The service also support children who require continence products because continence may not be possible due to medical issues.

The continence service is delivered from our local children's centres, clinics and hospitals around the West Essex area.
If you already have an appointment booked with our team during the current Coronavirus situation and you are unable to attend, before you consider cancelling, we are able to offer consultations over the phone during your booked time slot.
Please contact the administration 24 hours before your appointment on 0300 247 0122, Option 3, Option 1, ensure we have your correct contact details and they will advise the clinicians.

Information for Referrers

Children are referred into the service by a health professional, this is usually the child's health visitor, school nurse or general practitioner.

Referral Form:

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Children's Continence Service - Essex Child and Family Wellbeing Service

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The West Essex Children's Continence Service works with families of children from the age of 4 years to young people up to the age of 18 that are registered with a GP in West Essex and have bowel or bladder problems that have not been able to be managed with the support of the child's health visitor or school nurse.

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Supporting an Autistic Child with Toileting

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Supporting an Autistic Child with Toileting

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Teaching your child to use the toilet correctly can be a difficult task, whether they are on the autism spectrum or not. But if your child is autistic, the process of developing a toilet routine can take longer, and involve its own particular challenges. This guide provides some useful steps that will hopefully make your toilet training a success.

When to start

Choose a time when you have few engagements and are feeling relatively stress free. Some indicators of a good time to start are:

if your child has begun to become aware of needing to go to the toilet

if you notice changes in their behaviour patterns, such as appearing distracted or fidgeting when they are wet or have soiled

if they let you know when they need changing

if you have observed that your child is aware that they have started/finished weeing or pooing

if your child has shown an interest in using or used the toilet themselves without being prompted

if your child can avoid having a wee or poo accident for one or two hours at a time (ie has improved bladder/bowel control).

Developing a toileting routine

Remember that independent toileting is the ultimate aim and may take many months but there will be many small steps and successes along the way. As well as physical factors associated with toilet training, there are social factors to consider. It is rare for an autistic child to have the social motivation to want to be like mummy/daddy/friend and use the toilet. After using nappies for a number of years, your child might not see the point in starting to use the toilet. It's important to remember that all children are different and they will not all respond to the same teaching techniques.

Children on the autism spectrum often like routine. You can build upon this desire for predictability to develop a successful toilet training routine.

When changing your child's nappy, do this where the toilet is so they can start relating toileting activities to the bathroom.

Your child may behave differently than normal when their routine is changed so let everyone who cares for them know why there could be a change in behaviour. It is often easier not to use a potty as part of toilet training to avoid a possibly difficult change from potty to toilet.

Ensure everyone working with your child starts toilet training at the same time and follows your agreed approach. Send in any equipment to nursery/school which you use at home, for example a toilet seat they may use to make the seat smaller. Also remember to send spare clothes, plastic bags to put any wet clothes in and wet wipes. It is important that you have clear lines of communication during this time so having a home/school book to share concerns and successes is vital.

Observe your child over a few days to see when they do a wee or a poo. Identifying a regular pattern can help you take your child to the toilet with an increased likelihood of them doing a wee or poo. This then leads to positive reinforcement.

Continue to take your child at set times based on your observations. If they wet themselves at another time, take them to the toilet as quickly as possible and try to get them there so some of the wee goes into the toilet. Ignore the wetting and positively reinforce that the wee has gone into the toilet and continue the rest of the toileting routine.

Use a visual sequence beside the toilet to help your child understand what is expected of them, for example: trousers down, pants down, sit on the toilet, wee/poo in the toilet, wipe (you may need to show how many squares of paper to take), pants up, trousers up, flush toilet, wash hands. The sequence can either be in the form of photographs, pictures or the written word - whatever is most suitable and motivating for your child. You may need to create a way of removing or covering over each symbol as the step is completed to show that it is finished and to move on to the next step. There are some examples of visual supports on the Do2Learn website.

Make sure any pictures or instructions are very clear so there is no misunderstanding. For example, if you are teaching your son to stand and wee in the toilet, show an outline drawing of him standing and weeing in the toilet. If you are teaching sitting, show a picture of him sitting and weeing in the toilet.

Show your child a photo or drawing of the toilet and say 'your child's name, toilet', take them into the toilet, follow your visual sequence for undressing and sit your child on the toilet. Even if they do not open their bowel or bladder, continue to follow the visual sequence as if they had.

Use a laminated visual sequence above the sink at eye level for hand washing.

Teach toileting as a whole routine from communicating the need to go to the toilet, using the toilet, to drying hands, rather than just sitting on the toilet.

Keep the sequence of behaviours the same every time. Often when an activity is anticipated, the child is more receptive to it.

Concentrate on tackling one behaviour at a time; it's very difficult to change two behaviours at once.

Decide whether or not and how to praise your child for successfully following the toileting routine. Some children enjoy and respond to social praise ('well done', or a tickle), others respond better to an object. Some children find praise difficult and keeping a calm, structured routine with a preferred activity after toileting may work better.

Dressing and undressing

Dress your child in comfortable clothes they can easily manage themselves such as elasticated waistbands on trousers and skirts or dresses that are not too long.

Motivate your child to wear underwear by buying pants with their favourite cartoon or television programme characters on them.

Use 'backward chaining' to teach new skills. This involves breaking a skill down into smaller steps, teaching the last stage of the sequence first. So if you were teaching your child to pull up his trousers, you would pull them up to his hips and then he would pull them up to his waist. Next time, you would pull them up to just under his hips and he would pull them over his hips and waist. This is a particularly good way of teaching new skills as it raises your child's self-esteem as they have taken the final step of the task themselves to complete the sequence.

Hand washing

Follow the same steps each time: sleeves up, tap on, wet hands, squirt soap, rub hands together, rinse hands, turn off tap, shake hands, dry hands.

Stand behind your child and physically prompt them if necessary, slowly withdrawing.

Avoid using verbal prompts as your child can become dependent on these without you realising. Instead let your child refer to a visual sequence as a reminder.

You may wish to teach your child to use the cold tap only. Beware that if you teach them to use the hot tap independently at home, when they go into other settings and wash their hands, the water may be too hot and could burn them.

Boys - sit or stand?

When deciding whether to teach a boy to sit or stand to urinate, ask yourself the following questions:

Can they distinguish between when they want to wee and poo?

Do they have the co-ordination, focus and control needed to aim?

If they learn by imitation, is there someone they can watch?

If the answer to any of the above is 'yes', then they are probably able to be taught to stand to urinate. To start teaching them to aim, it can be useful to put a piece of cereal (preferably one they don't eat as this could lead to confusion) down the toilet so they have something to aim for and concentrate on. You can also purchase a variety of fun toilet target stickers online.

Bowel control

Bowel control is usually learnt after bladder control. Some children can find bowel movements very frightening and not understand what is happening. It can help to get a book with pictures to explain the digestion process.

Some children find the feel of a full nappy comforting, and may enjoy the sensory feeling of the weight of the nappy. Find alternative ways to replace these feelings so you can continue toilet training. Give your child a means of requesting the activity eg being wrapped in a warm, heavy blanket and fit it into their routine.

Sit your child on the toilet, keep the nappy on but with a hole cut in the bottom, slowly cut away the nappy each time until they are able to go without the nappy at all. To start with, they will still have the feeling of a security around their waist which in turn will enable them to feel relaxed enough to poo on the toilet.

Habit training

Some children are toilet trained through habit. Habit training is effective for children who may: lack awareness, not understand the significance or meaning related to physical sensations, be limited by decreased or absent physical sensations or have unsuccessfully tried toilet training before.

Habit training involves training the body to go at set times. Take your child to the toilet at set times throughout the day, every day.

As before, observe your child to discover the best times to take them to the toilet.

Make sure your child feels relaxed enough to open their bladder/bowels while they sit on the toilet. Having the tap running in the background can help enable your child to wee for example.

Sometimes having a toy to handle - not one which causes excitement - can be useful to both keep your child on the toilet and relax them. Keep certain toys/books for just when they are sitting on the toilet.

If your child lacks awareness or sensation, they may have to be taught a strategy before getting off the toilet, to avoid accidentally weeing on the floor. Encourage them to slowly count to ten out loud when they have finished weeing before allowing them to get up, or give them a sand timer to look at.

To help your child to independently manage their own toileting routine when they are older, you can buy watches which you can set to vibrate at certain times throughout the day. You can then teach your child when the watch vibrates, they are to go to the toilet.

Environment

Ensure the bathroom is a calm, relaxing environment to encourage independence and success with the complete toileting routine.

Remove all distractions which are not associated with toileting to help your child understand what is expected of them while in the toilet.

Make the bathroom as comfortable as possible, adding foot supports, side rails and a smaller toilet seat if necessary.

Encourage independence by ensuring that everything in the bathroom is at the right level for your child eg soap and towels.

Think about your child's sensory needs and make changes to reduce their anxiety. Does the soap smell too strong for them? Does the noise of the extractor fan bother them? Does the water temperature need to be adjusted? Is the lighting too bright?

Make sure your child can sit comfortably on the toilet with hips and knees flexed at a 90 degree angle and have feet flat on a secure object.

Night-time

Once your child is mostly dry during the day you will be able to start night-time toilet training.

Have a set bedtime routine which does not change with weekends or holidays.

Limit the amount your child eats and drinks before bed, having no fluid an hour before bedtime, but ensuring your child has enough fluid throughout the day.

Take your child to the toilet before they go to bed. They then may need to be taken once during the night. You could fit this in with your routine by taking them before you go to bed.

If they are unable to keep dry during the night, you may need to try different times in the night to take them.

Use products to protect bedding.

Schools and early years settings

Admission to school should not be refused simply because a child has difficulties with continence. A school that does this may be at risk of disability discrimination (alternative legislation operates in Northern Ireland).

Further tips

Giving a drink 10 to 15 minutes before toileting can help increase the chances of your child successfully doing a wee on the toilet but avoid giving too much as this creates an unnatural routine.

Decide if you are going to teach your child to shut the door as part of the whole toileting routine or only in certain situations.

Avoid using childlike terms for toileting as your child may find it difficult to change language later in life.

If your child has a fear of flushing the toilet, you may wish to remove this from the visual sequence and leave it until the end of the routine - after your child has dried their hands. They then may need to stand in the doorway while you flush the toilet and gradually stand closer each time until they are able to flush for themselves. Playing calming music to drown out the noise of the flush or explaining with pictures what makes the noise when the toilet is flushed may also help.

When your child is in a car, ensure they have a protector to sit on to stop the car seat from being soiled by accidents. Avoid drinks before long car journeys.

Be aware that some children will hold onto their wee/poo until they have their nappy put on, for example if they know they always have a nappy on before going in the car they may wait until it is put back to release their bowel/bladder.

A range of absorbent pants and swimwear for older children is available.

Once your child is toilet trained at home, you will want to teach them to use toilets when out. When visiting new places, show your child where the toilets are and use the same routine as you do at home. Use the same picture and toy or book they may have for toileting at home.

Some children smear their poo. Read our guide on smearing for strategies to try (link to new guide in behaviour section).

Further information

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Toileting - a guide for parents and carers

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This guide provides some useful steps to help make toilet training an autistic child a success.

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We're here for you

At Sleep Foundation, we combine decades of experience in sleep health education with comprehensive product testing and the latest in sleep research to put you on the path to good sleep.

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At SleepFoundation.org, we combine decades of experience in sleep health education with comprehensive product testing and the latest in sleep research to put you on the path to good sleep.

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Huge thanks to our corporate partner, Furniture Village, who has helped us to launch a brand new National Sleep Helpline to ensure that everyone has access to high quality, evidence-based advice regardless of age, ethnicity, background or income.
"We've always believed that sleep is equally as important as diet and exercise yet we know the UK is really struggling to sleep, particularly with the ongoing effects of the pandemic" says Charlie Harrison, Furniture Village Commercial Director. "From my work as a doctor, I know how great the need for a National Sleep Helpline is. It will make a huge difference to so many people." Dr Ranj, Furniture Village Sleep and Wellness Advisor
Working together to improve the nation's sleep.

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National Sleep Helpline - The Sleep Charity

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Who do I talk to if I can't sleep? The National Sleep Helpline can help with your sleep problems, 7pm-9pm, Sunday to Thursday, 03303 530 541.

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We have many people in our network who are looking for resources on how to talk to young people about Autism, neurodiversity and/or being Autistic in ways that are respectful and validating.

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Neurowild: Beautiful Illustrations to Explain Neurodiversity to all. 

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Neurowild: Beautiful Illustrations to Explain Neurodiversity to all. 

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From Emily Hammond of NeuroWild, “All Brains Are Different”, a beautiful conversation starter with neurodivergent kids or potentially neurodivergent kids to explore what accommodations they might need to feel safe and supported (view here: tinyurl.com/yc62csmz). Downloadable version here (tinyurl.com/37utrsef).

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When children attend school consistently they are more likely to do well in their work but also build strong relationships and feel connected with the school community. It also demonstrates reliability which will help prepare children for life beyond education and looks positive to future employers.

By law, parents are responsible for ensuring all children of compulsory school age attend school or are educated at home. If your child misses school for at least 10% of the time they will be classed as persistently absent, which is treated seriously (unless there is a valid reason such as serious illness). You will be considered to be breaking the law and can be fined or even prosecuted.

Types of absence

Unauthorised absence - when children miss school without permission, for example a birthday treat, a day trip, over-sleeping, taking a long weekend or shopping.

Authorised absence - only the headteacher can authorise absences. You must apply for permission every time and they may also request further evidence to support the reasons. The school should inform you of their procedure.

If your child is too ill to attend, you should inform the school and give them an idea of when they will return. It's important to stay in touch with the school about longer term illness so that they can work with you to minimise disruption to your child's learning.

Supporting good attendance

If your child is anxious or worried about going to school, ask the school for help. Every child is entitled to additional support to help them engage with learning and there will sometimes be named staff who have a specific responsibility for this.

School refusal

School refusal is often known as school phobia. For many children it's a temporary state, but for some families it is more serious.

Talk to the school as soon as you are worried. Find out if your child has unexplained absences or lateness that you do not know about - sometimes children do not behave at home and school in the same way. See if the teachers have noticed changes in mood or behaviour. Perhaps something has happened at school or there could be something bubbling under the surface that you are not aware of.

Don't jump to conclusions - you may think you know what the problem is but you need to talk to your child and the teacher. Try not to interrogate or blame and don't rush into decisions. Work together with the school and once you have come up with a plan, stick to it for at least half a term. It's important to have this consistency to increase your child's sense of security and give them a routine. It also gives everyone the chance to evaluate the success of the strategy.

There is further information on the law surrounding school attendance in each of the regions.

A child could be excluded for a number of reasons including breaches of the behaviour policy, or the actions of a parent but it's important to know that most schools will only exclude a child as a last resort. Your child can't be sent home unless it's formally recognised as an exclusion.

If your child is excluded the headteacher should notify you of the period of the exclusion and their reasons without delay.

They should also provide you with the following information in writing as soon as is possible:

The reason for the exclusion

The number of days the child is going to be excluded for, or letting you know that it is permanent

Your right to make representations to Governing Body about the exclusion, and how your child can be involved in this

How these representations can be made

Whether or not you are legally entitled to attend a meeting with the governors (and your right to bring representation or a friend if you are entitled to attend)

The days on which (during the first five days of exclusion) that your child must not be present in a public place

The decision to exclude permanently should be ​"in response to a serious breach or persistent breaches of the school's behaviour policy; and where allowing the pupil to remain in school would seriously harm the education or welfare of the pupil or others in the school".

What happens next?

Following exclusion, either fixed term or permanent, you may be entitled to attend a meeting with the Governing Body of your school.

If the exclusion is for less than five days you do not have a legal right to attend a Governing Body meeting. You can make your representations in writing, and the Governors must consider them, however they cannot direct the child to be reinstated.

If the exclusion is for more than five but less than 15 days and you would like to make representations, you should make these in writing to the Chair of Governors. The Governing Body must consider reinstatement of your child within 50 school days. If you do not want to make representations, the Governors are not required to consider reinstating your child.

If the exclusion is for more than 15 days or is permanent the Governing Body must consider the reinstatement of the pupil within 15 school days. You have the right to attend a meeting and make your representations in person and you are also allowed to bring a representative or friend to support you in the meeting. If the school is a local authority school, a local authority representative will also attend.

If the exclusion would cause a child to miss a public examination or national curriculum test the Governing Body must consider reinstatement of the pupil within 15 school days. The Governing Body should also, as far as reasonably practicable, try and review the exclusion before the date of the test or exam; however you still have the right to make your representations.

The Local Authority has a duty to provide education from the sixth day of the exclusion. It is recommended that you accept the school place offered by the local authority, even if you are not happy with the placement, as if you refuse the local authority's duty is discharged and the duty would then fall on you to home educate or find an alternative school.

Following the meeting

In the case of both a fixed term (over five days) and a permanent exclusion, if the Governing Body decides to reinstate a pupil, the school are under a legal duty to add an amendment to the child's educational record which indicates the exclusion was overturned.

If your child has been given a fixed term exclusion and isn't reinstated, there is no further right of appeal; however you are within your rights to make a formal complaint to the school to raise your concerns. The complaint should be made in line with the schools own complaints procedure.

For permanent exclusions you have the right to escalate the appeal to the Independent Review Panel. You have 15 school days from receiving the Governor's decision to lodge your appeal and the Governing Body should give you details of when and where you should do this. You should submit as much evidence as you feel is necessary to support your case.

You are also able to bring a claim of discrimination if you feel that the exclusion arose as a result of discrimination.

Independent Review Panel

The Panel should meet within 15 school days of receiving your application (however, they can adjourn if necessary). You have the right to make written and oral representations to the panel, and any evidence should be circulated at least five days before the review.

If you have requested a SEN Expert they can inform the panel of how SEN may have been relevant to the exclusion. If the SEN expert does not attend, but you have requested one, you can ask the hearing to be adjourned until an expert is available.

The Independent Review Panel will notify you, in writing, of their decision and the reasons for that decision. They cannot direct reinstatement of the pupil. They can send the case back to the Governing Body to reconsider their decision.

Even if you tell the panel that you do not want the child to return to the school, the Independent Review Panel should treat the case the same way. If the Independent Review Panel does not recommend the Governing Body reconsider their decision, there is no further right of appeal.
What happens if the Governing Body has to reconsider?
This does not guarantee that the child will return to the school. The Governing Body should reconvene within 10 days of the Independent Review Panel decision and should seriously consider whether the child should be reinstated, however the outcome could still be the same.

If the Governing Body offers to reinstate the pupil, you can refuse and an amendment will be added to the child's educational record to explain that the decision has been overturned, and the basis for the Governors decision.

If you do wish for the child to return, the amendment will be added in the same way and the child will be able to return, however the school may request you attend a reintegration meeting.

If the Governing Body refuses to reinstate your child, unfortunately the options to challenge this are limited. You cannot take it back to the Independent Review Panel, but you could consider legal action through Judicial Review. You would need to find a Public Law Solicitor in your area to try and challenge this.

For more information and guidance read the full Child Law Advice Service information guide or call their advice line on 0300 3305 485 or visit childlawadvice.org.uk

Encouraging positive behaviour

There are lots of reasons for difficult or challenging behaviour so if you're told your child's behaviour requires improvement, it's important to put aside your emotions, do some fact-finding, and work together with your child and their teachers to get the best outcome.
Listen to your child without judgement
Have open conversations with your child and listen closely to what they tell you. Let them talk freely about what it's like at school, and ask what goes well as well as what doesn't. Older children will be able to tell you in more detail, but try and encourage your child to focus on facts rather than emotions and opinions.

Wait until your child has finished before moving on to discuss what might make things better for them. Try to avoid saying anything that might (unintentionally) reinforce or make worse any negative feelings they have about themselves or school, like ​"you shouldn't feel that way" or ​"your teacher shouldn't do that".
Find out what the school expects
Once you've got a handle on your child's view of the situation, make an appointment to speak to their teacher. Prepare for the meeting by reading the school behaviour policy, so you'll have a good understanding of what's expected and how the school promotes positive behaviour for learning.

The relationship you have with your child's teacher and school will certainly affect how you feel about going in for this kind of meeting. If you're at all worried about it, read our tips for communicating with the school.
Talk to your child's teacher
Just as you had an open, non-judgmental conversation with your child, try and do the same with their teacher. Listen to what they tell you before asking questions or talking about solutions. Take with you some notes from the conversations you've had with your child, and a list of questions you'd like to ask. If you're not clear on what the school's behaviour policy is, or why they manage behaviour in the way they do, ask your child's teacher to explain their reasons.

There's lots of information that will be useful for you to share too, like a list of the things you do at home that support positive behaviour for learning, and some examples of any challenges you've faced in the past (or now), including what has, or hasn't worked.

Discuss any concerns you have about how school affects your child, for example if they're struggling with homework, reluctant to go to school, or showing any signs of anxiety or stress. If there's something going on at home that could be affecting their behaviour at school, like a sick relative or a house move, it's really helpful for teachers to know about it - any personal information you share will be treated with confidence.

In a nutshell, the more open the communication is between home and school, the easier it will be to work together to make school life happier for your child.
Promote positive behaviour at home
When your child does something great, like working hard on a project (not necessarily school-related), showing kindness to friends or family, or being persistent at something - let them know you've noticed their efforts by telling them so, and remind them they should be proud of themselves too.

Be a good role model. We can all have our off days, but don't underestimate the power of being a good role model for your kids. If you want them to be respectful, kind (online as well as in the ​'real' world), and feel positive about school, then make sure they see you behaving that way too. If you have rules in place, like doing homework before TV, or no phones at the dinner table, the whole family needs to stick to them.

Support their learning. Talk positively about school and let your child know you're there to support their learning at home, support them at exam time, attend parents' evenings, and (as much as you can) go along to other school events.
Seek expert help if you're worried
If you're worried that your child's behaviour isn't improving, or they're struggling to cope, make an appointment to speak to the staff member responsible for pastoral care at your child's school. If you're concerned there could be an underlying condition affecting their behaviour, contact your GP or other family health professional.

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When children attend school consistently they are more likely to do well in their work but also build strong relationships and feel connected with the school community. It also demonstrates reliability which will help prepare children for life beyond education and looks positive to future employers.

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See if you can set aside some time every day to talk to your little one about how their day went and what they're expecting from tomorrow. That way, you can help them anticipate any tricky situations and plan how they might behave. Bedtime is a great time to do this, as that's when kids' minds will naturally be digesting their day.

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How to help your child make friends at primary school

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Worried about how your little one will cope at big school? The start of term can be an emotional time for everyone, especially if your child is heading off to a new school.

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Every parent knows schoolyard friendships are important. Friends enrich our lives, boost our self-esteem, and provide the moral support we need when we're memorizing multiplication tables. Developmentally speaking, making a friend in school is every bit as important as getting an A. Learning how to form successful peer relationships is a critical skill for kids, and one that they will be using-and refining-all their lives.

But some kids have a harder time fitting in. Cornerstones of childhood interaction, like sharing a toy or engaging in make-believe, might elude them. While parents can't make friends for their children, they can help them develop and practice key social skills. If you see your child struggling to make friends or getting rejected by other kids, here are some steps you can take to help.

Building social skills

Social skills don't come naturally to all kids. Impulsive and hyperactive children often act in ways that stymie their strong desire for friendship, notes Mary Rooney, PhD, a psychologist who specializes in ADHD and disruptive behavior disorders. They often have trouble taking turns and controlling their anger when they don't get their way. More inattentive kids may act flighty or hover at the margins of playgroups, unsure of how to assert themselves.

If you notice that your child is struggling to interact with their peers, try some coaching at home. Emphasize taking turns and sharing during family playtime and explain that friends expect the same good behavior. Impulsive children will also benefit from practicing different strategies for settling peer conflict. Role playing can be very helpful here. Of course, as a parent you should also be careful to model good social behavior yourself when talking to family members and your own friends.

For kids who need more intensive guidance, experts suggest using "social scripts," or simple everyday conversations that kids can practice with their parents. You can work with your child's doctor or behavioral therapist to select appropriate scripts and develop a strategy for rehearsing and implementing them. Social scripts are especially helpful for children on the autism spectrum who need to deliberately learn key social skills, such as establishing eye contact and responding to the moods of others.

Finally, if your child has been having a hard time making friends, Dr. Rooney suggests setting up a meeting with their teacher. "Often kids will say 'everyone hates me,' but they may not be able to describe what's going on." Teachers can give a better sense of your child's peer interactions and suggest more positive classmates for after-school playdates.

Supervised playdates are a great way for children to build their social muscles. Dr. Rooney suggests that parents spend some time before playdates reviewing social cues with their children. Some activities for playdate-prep include:

Talk with your child about what it means to be a good host. What will your child do to make their guests feel comfortable?

Have your child pick out a few games in advance. How will your child know when it's time to move on to the next game?

Ask your child how they'll know if guests are having a good time. Are they smiling? Laughing?

As long as the children don't veer into play that's outright dangerous, let the playdate unfold as it may, recommends Jamie Howard, PhD, a clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute. Children learn from the natural consequences of their actions, which is why it's so important to let them practice socializing in a warm, supportive setting.

And when you review how it went, focus on the good behaviors you want to reinforce. "Kids are more motivated by praise than by avoiding criticism," says Dr. Howard. "Specific, labeled praise is most helpful. Instead of 'good job,' say, 'you shared very well with your friend.'"

Helping shy kids

Some kids are natural social butterflies while others need more time to warm up to new situations. Don't worry if your child is a little more hesitant in social situations. Expecting every child to jump in and be the leader of the group isn't realistic, so avoid pushing too hard. However, parents shouldn't make the mistake of keeping more tentative kids at home, either. Rachel Busman, PsyD, a psychologist who works with anxious kids, explains, "There's a difference between accommodating and enabling. For shyer kids we want to give them opportunities to meet new kids, but we want to help bridge the transition so they aren't too uncomfortable."

Dr. Busman suggests planning playdates at your house first, where your child will be most at ease. Clubs or other activities are also a good way to make friends because they provide built-in structure that helps minimize anxiety. If your child is reluctant to try something new, suggest inviting a friend they're already comfortable with to join in. As with any social skill, parents can help shy kids rehearse ahead of time for a situation that makes them nervous, like going to a birthday party or meeting a new group of people.

Every child is different

Dr. Busman notes there is also a difference between children who are shy and children who are simply more introverted and prefer spending their down time reading or drawing by themselves. "Different children in the same family can have different social limits and degrees of comfort. A child who prefers quiet time or being in small groups isn't necessarily avoiding other kids." But it's essential that more introverted children still get opportunities to make friends. Dr. Busman recommends knowing how much your child can handle and setting expectations accordingly. It's enough for some kids to find just one thing they like to do once a week.

Finally, it's important that parents not place too many of their own social expectations on children. Dr. Rooney advises keeping things in perspective. "Kids need just one or two good friends. You don't have to worry about them being the most popular kid in their class."

How can you help your child make friends?

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Kids Who Need a Little Help to Make Friends - Child Mind Institute

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What parents can do when kids struggle with social skills. How to help kids who need a little help to make friends and develop friendships.

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Are you worried that your child is having friendship issues? You may feel anxious that these are happening outside your control and concerned about the effect on your child's emotional state.

Learning social skills are just as important as learning to read and write and personal and social education is part of the curriculum. However, there are steps you can take to support and develop your child's social skills and confidence. Read the blog below to find practical, empathetic tips.

How does your child like to play?

Some children are naturally more introverted than others or prefer to play alone some of the time. Introverts enjoy the company of others but need time alone to recharge their batteries, finding constant company exhausting. If this is your child, let them have this time and try not to be anxious about it.

Similarly, some people prefer the company of just one or two close friends, rather than being at the centre of a large group. If this is your child, talk about the joy of having a couple of really good friends, rather than lots of 'friends' that you might not know so well.

How can I talk about these issues with my child?

If you do feel there is a friendship issue going on, talk to your child about it. If they say, 'I've got no friends,' or 'No one would play with me today,' ask, 'What do you mean?' Sometimes a child has fallen out with a key member of their friendship group during the day, which has naturally upset them and perhaps made them feel a little alienated. However, young children frequently make up as quickly as they fall out.

Reassure your child, talk through what happened and discuss positive steps they can take to make things better by using these cards.

Is your child struggling with friendships?

If so, keep talking to your child - but be careful not to give them a daily interrogation. Rather, be on hand to listen when they do want to open up about their day. The likelihood is that your child is struggling either because they themselves find social skills difficult to master, or because they're being treated unkindly by other children. You could try talking to them about what a good friend looks like.

What should I do if my child is being treated unkindly?

As a parent not being able to support and protect your children at school is hard especially when you suspect that your child is being treated unkindly. Approach the class teacher as soon as possible to talk through a plan to deal with this. It may be that things are not as bad as you think.

Most teachers have a pretty good idea of what is going on socially with the children in their class and they can keep a closer eye on your child for a while. They can also suggest appropriate children who can 'buddy up' with your child and support them.

Resist the urge to approach the parents of any child you feel is being unkind - this rarely works well, and it doesn't show your child the best way to deal with difficult situations.

How can I help my child with their social skills?

Social skills don't come automatically to all children, especially younger ones. Some children are naturally quite impulsive or lively. They have a strong desire for friendship but can struggle to control their reactions to others. This might be when they feel they've been unfairly treated or if they're losing control of the way a game is going. These cards can help your child to think about a range of situations and how their peers might feel.

Other children can be unsure how to assert themselves and have their voice heard, so may stay on the margins of group play and social activities.

These flashcards can help you to discuss with your child how a good friend might behave.

How can I build my child's confidence and social skills?

You can practise social skills at home and build confidence by helping your child to talk about what their best qualities are. You could also give opportunities for your child to practise taking turns, sharing and coping when things don't go their way, perhaps by playing a board game as a family.

Try to model positive reactions to difficult situations. You could also talk about why, as a family, you expect people to treat each other fairly, because you care for each other and want everyone to feel happy. Then explain that our friends expect the same.

How can role-play help children in social situations?

Role-play, with teddies, dolls, action figures, even toy cars, is a great way to explore different situations with young children. Act out some different responses to situations and their consequences, then discuss the outcome. For example, 'Teddy is mean to Rabbit because Rabbit has a toy he wants. As a result, Rabbit is hurt and cries, running to tell the teacher. Teddy gets into trouble and also feels sad'.

Talk about how Teddy can make amends for the situation by saying sorry and about what he could do differently next time.

What is a social script?

Just as adults may rehearse what they are going to say when meeting a new person or having a job interview, for example, it can be helpful for children to practise how they will respond to different situations.

These cards provide a range of scenarios that you can work through with your little one.

Playdates

You might want to invite one of your child's friends over for a play date. Beforehand, you could talk to your child about how to be a good host. What games should they play? It could be a good idea to plan something such as baking cakes, building a den or constructing a train set.

Talk to your child about what they should do if there's a disagreement or their friend wants to change the game. Then leave them to it. Children need to learn about the consequences of their actions, so resist the urge to interfere unless things are getting physically dangerous!

If you do sense tension is building up too much, break it up by suggesting a snack or an activity change. Once the friend has gone home, talk about what went well.

Model positive relationships yourself

If your child sees you interacting positively with your family and friends, they're more likely to do the same. Make sure that you keep interactions with your child positive too - don't put your own social needs onto them.

Most friendship issues sort themselves out. If you feel the problem isn't going away, it would be a good idea to talk to your child's class teacher for more support.

If you've found this blog about how to deal with friendship issues helpful, why not read one of our other blogs, such as this guide to children's mindfulness?
Black History Month: Facts About Famous Figures Back to School: Ten Free Spanish Activities and Ideas for Parents Easy Halloween Crafts for Kids
We hope you find the information on our website and resources useful. As far as possible, the contents of this resource are reflective of current professional research. However, please be aware that every child is different and information can quickly become out of date. The information given here is intended for general guidance purposes only and may not apply to your specific situation.

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Helping Your Child to Develop Positive Friendships

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Are you worried that your child is having friendship issues? You may feel anxious that these are happening outside your control and concerned about the effect on your child's emotional state. Learning social skills are just as important as learning to read and write and personal and social education is part of the curriculum.

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Occupational Therapy Essex is an independent occupational therapy practice specialising in working with children with sensory processing difficulties, Developmental Coordination Disorder/Dyspraxia, hypermobility, Autism, developmental delay and handwriting difficulties.

We work directly with families, with schools and with Local Authorities. Assessment and intervention is usually provided at schools in Essex, Havering and Thurrock.

Assessment can be provided informally to provide practical advice or as part of the Education, Health and Care Plan assessment process.

Every family or school can expect a personalised service and individual attention. Goals are set to meet each individual's priorities and are worked towards within agreed timescales.

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Independent Occupational Therapy Services in Essex

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Occupational Therapy Essex is an independent occupational therapy practice specialising in working with children with sensory processing difficulties, Developmental Coordination Disorder/Dyspraxia, hypermobility, Autism, developmental delay and handwriting difficulties. We work directly with families, with schools and with Local Authorities. Assessment and intervention is usually provided at schools in Essex, Havering and Thurrock.

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The National Handwriting Association is a charity whose aims are to raise awareness of the importance of handwriting and keyboarding as vital components of literacy, to promote good practice in the teaching of handwriting and to support those who work with children with handwriting difficulties.
SUBSCRIBE TO OUR NEWSLETTER

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Charity promoting good practice in handwriting

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Supporting individuals and families affected by dyspraxia/DCD

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Movement Matters UK

Movement Matters is the UK umbrella organisation representing the major national groups concerned with children and adults with coordination difficulties, a condition called Developmental Coordination Disorder (or DCD) and sometimes referred to as 'dyspraxia'.

Movement Matters was formed early in 2011 to act as an umbrella group to bring together the key bodies involved in Developmental Coordination Disorder/Dyspraxia in the UK.

This includes DCD-UK, the Dyspraxia Foundation, and the National Handwriting Association.

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Developemental Coordination Disorder, DCD, Dyspraxia, ADHD SPLD, support and information, Movement Matters

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Movement Matters is the UK umbrella organisation representing the major national groups concerned with children and adults with coordination difficulties, a condition called Developmental Coordination Disorder (or DCD) and sometimes referred to as 'dyspraxia'. Movement Matters was formed early in 2011 to act as an umbrella group to bring together the key bodies involved in Developmental Coordination Disorder/Dyspraxia in the UK.

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What is ADHD?

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects behaviour and concentration.

Children and young people with ADHD often seem unusually restless, impulsive or distracted. They may speak or act without thinking, struggle with organisation, find it hard to focus or appear to be always on the go. Some people with ADHD do not experience hyperactivity; this used to be called attention deficit disorder (ADD), though the term in no longer used officially.

ADHD is not a mental illness or a learning disability, though children and young people with ADHD may also have other conditions or experience mental health problems.

Living with ADHD can be very challenging, for children and young people as well as for their parents and carers. But the right diagnosis, treatment and support can make a big difference to a child's learning, life skills and relationships, as well as making family life easier. There is also lots you can do as a parent/carer to help your child manage the things they find difficult.

What are the most common symptoms of ADHD?

A child with ADHD may be:

easily distracted, finding it difficult to start or finish tasks

often unable to concentrate

often restless or fidgety

very talkative, often interrupting or blurting things out

impulsive, acting before considering consequences, prone to taking risks

easily angry or frustrated, struggling to deal with emotions

finding making or maintaining friendships difficult

disorganised, for instance often losing things or being late

lacking awareness of time

Every child or young person with ADHD is individual and they may not display all of these behaviours. And many of these traits and behaviours are typical in younger children, or can follow a traumatic experience - they don't necessarily mean your child has ADHD.

Age and gender can also affect how someone with ADHD behaves. This can make it harder to spot signs of ADHD, particularly in girls, who are more likely to be undiagnosed or wrongly diagnosed with other conditions.

Typically the symptoms of ADHD develop in early childhood and they may become particularly noticeable at times of significant change, such as starting or changing school.

What to do if you think your child might have ADHD

If your child frequently experiences some of these symptoms and it's affecting their day-to-day life, discuss your concerns with your child's GP. Before doing this, talk to your child's teacher and the school special educational needs co-ordinator (SENCO) about what they have noticed.

The GP may want to refer your child for assessment, as ADHD can only be diagnosed by a specialist such as a child and adolescent psychiatrist or paediatrician.

Sometimes parents are reluctant to pursue assessment. They may be worried about 'labelling' their child or about stigma, or they may prefer to watch and wait. These feelings are normal. But parents and young people who do seek diagnosis can find it helps them access the right support; understand and manage challenges; and identify individual strengths.

We have more information about getting support from the GP, CAMHS or school in our guide.

ADHD diagnosis, support and treatment

ADHD assessment is usually done through the specialist Children and Young People's Mental Health Services, commonly referred to as CAMHS.

Diagnosis is most commonly made in childhood, and in the majority of cases, symptoms affecting daily life continue into adulthood.

There is no single, definitive test for ADHD. Specialists will base clinical diagnosis on a combination of observations of your child; discussions and questionnaires (with you and your child); and information from your child's school.

They will consider how long the symptoms have been present; their impact on your child's daily life; and whether they might be due to another condition. The NHS states that approximately 60-80% of children with ADHD have at least one other condition (such as autism, dyslexia, dyspraxia, anxiety or behaviour problems), and your child may be given more than one diagnosis.

Support and treatment options

You and your child should be offered support and advice to help manage ADHD in their day-to-day life.

ADHD can also be treated with medication and/or therapies. These should be discussed with you when your child is diagnosed, and are set out in the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) guidelines on ADHD.

ADHD can be treated with therapies such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT). For more information about therapy, see our parent guide to counselling and therapy.

There are a number of types of medication. These are not a cure for ADHD, and many children do not take them, but they can help manage some of the symptoms. Medication must be prescribed and overseen by a specialist.

You may also be offered ADHD -focussed parent training. This does not mean your parenting is somehow wrong. It is designed to provide support and specific strategies and skills to help you and your child thrive.

Jack is still perennially late, disorganised and impulsive; but he's also energetic, original and creative. The medication is helping him make the most of all of that.

What you can do to support your child with ADHD

Be explicit and consistent about unacceptable behaviour, such as violence. Set appropriate consequences and follow them through, but try to stay calm in the moment to avoid escalation. Dealing with challenging behaviour can be very hard, and our parent guide has helpful advice.

Plan the day so your child knows what to expect. Maintaining regular sleep patterns, physical activity and mealtimes can help your child. Some people find dietary change and/or certain supplements helpful. But the NHS states that there is no clinical evidence for this, and medical advice should be sought first. Our young person's guide has helpful advice on sleep problems.

The impact of ADHD on your child's mental health

Any child or young person can struggle with their mental health and wellbeing, whether or not they have ADHD. This might be caused by things like family change, bullying, exam stress or a traumatic event.

But having ADHD may also mean your child has extra challenges - such as social difficulties, struggling to manage their emotions or getting into trouble at school - that leave them more vulnerable to low self-esteem, anxiety or depression.

Children and young people with ADHD frequently have other developmental or mental health conditions and it is important to ensure they have the appropriate support for these.

As a parent there is a lot you can do to support your child with their wellbeing and mental health:

encourage your child to talk about how they are feeling with you. Our starting a conversation guide has ideas for keeping communication open

if you feel your child may have a mental health problem or another condition alongside ADHD, discuss your concerns with their GP or ADHD specialist.

Working with school if your child has ADHD

ADHD is a special education need (SEN), and it may be referred to as a specific learning difference (SpLD). Your child is entitled to appropriate support to help them thrive socially and educationally. This could include potential adjustments in certain situations, such as extra time or rest breaks for exams, movement breaks in lessons, written instructions for tasks and a seating plan that minimises distractions.

Discuss the diagnosis and needs with the school's SENCO, taking a list of your concerns and background information to the meeting.

Your child may be entitled to an education, health and care plan (EHC plan) which details the support they need and how it will be provided. (The National Autistic Society has helpful information about EHC plans.)

Good communication between you and school can be really helpful in ensuring your child thrives in education and meets their potential. Our parent guide to support has more advice on talking to school or college.

ADHD in teenagers and beyond

If your child is a teenager or young person, their needs and the support you give may well be different from when they were younger. They may like to read our young person's guide to ADHD and mental health. But there are still many ways you can help.

Looking after your own wellbeing

Parenting a child with ADHD can sometimes be isolating, upsetting or exhausting. Sometimes parents feel judged or blamed by others (unjustifiably as parenting does not cause ADHD). It is entirely understandable if you are finding things difficult.

It's important to recognise the impact the situation is having on you, and think about ways you can take care of yourself - including getting support from other people so that you can take some time off. It's okay to ask for help when you need it, and to share your worries with someone you trust. We have advice on looking after yourself as well as your child.

Our son's challenging behaviour with ADHD had an enormous impact on the whole family, as we and his brothers bore the brunt of his anger.

Where to get further support

If you would to speak to a professional adviser or find out more about how you can support your child, these organisations can help.
While we take care to ensure that the organisations we signpost to provide high quality information and advice, we cannot take responsibility for any specific pieces of advice they may offer. We encourage parents and carers to always explore the website of a linked service or organisation to understand who they are and what support they offer before engaging with them.

This page was reviewed in March 2022. It was created with parents and carers with lived experience of supporting their child or young person with ADHD. We will next review the page in 2025. YoungMinds is a proud member of PIF TICK - the UK's quality mark for trusted health information.
Whether you love the page or think something is missing, we appreciate your feedback. It all helps us to support more young people with their mental health.

Please be aware that this form isn't a mental health support service. If your child is in crisis right now and you want to talk to someone urgently, find out who to contact on our urgent help page.

At YoungMinds we take your privacy seriously. If you'd like to read more about how we keep the information we collect safe, take a look at our privacy policy.

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ADHD Support For Your Child | Parents Advice Guide

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If your child is struggling to manage their ADHD, read our tips on what you can do to support them, how to get a diagnosis and where to find help.

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Building better futures for children with ADHD

UKAP recognises ADHD as a complex but treatable condition, which can have a profound impact on individuals, families and society.

We aim to support clinicians and allied professionals to identify and meet the needs of children and young people affected by this disorder. ADHD is now recognised as a condition that may cross the lifespan and there are multi-modal interventions for ADHD that can be delivered at every age.

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The UK ADHD Partnership supports clinicians and allied professionals to identify and meet the needs of children and young people affected by this disorder. ADHD is now recognised as a condition that may cross the lifespan and there are multi-modal interventions for ADHD that can be delivered at every age.

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The ADHD Foundation Neurodiversity Charity - an integrated health and education service.

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Essex Child and Family Wellbeing Service

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Essex Child and Family Wellbeing Service

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Essex Child and Family Wellbeing Service

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The Family Hub offer we provide and the outcomes we aim to achieve ensures all families within Essex are supported from before children are born up to the age of 19 or 25 for those with Special Educational needs.

We focus on making sure that everyone in Essex has the best possible start in life through having access to Free, high quality and easy access to services in your Community, School, Family Home or within a Family Hub.

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Welcome to your Family Hub - Essex Child and Family Wellbeing Service

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The Family Hub offer we provide and the outcomes we aim to achieve ensures all families within Essex are supported from before children are born up to the age of 19 or 25 for those with Special Educational needs.

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How to not need a holiday after the holidays

The holidays can be a stressful time for single parents, Natalie is a volunteer in our Wellbeing Digital Group and recently held an online workshop where she shared her 'go to' tools for managing the...

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We are Gingerbread, the charity for single parent families. We provide expert advice and practical support for single mums and dads in England and Wales.

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Hello! We empower and advocate for parents, carers and professionals who support children and young people with SEND. How may we help you?

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Special Needs Jungle provides parent-centred information, news, resources and informed opinion about SEN, disability, children’s health and SEN politics

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SEND Information, Advice and Support Service (SENDIASS) | Essex Local Offer

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A confidential and impartial information, advice and support service on issues related to special educational needs and disability (SEND). They can help with issues related to education, health and social care

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Welcome to Essex Autism Service - Essex Autism Service

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At Essex Autism Service we provide diagnostic assessments of autism spectrum conditions. for adults & children in Chelmsford, Colchester and around Essex.

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Self Pay Healthcare in Essex | Wellbeing

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We understand that a diagnosis of neurological challenges can often be the turning point in being able to access further support, and that obtaining a diagnosis can often be a lengthy process on the NHS. We are proud to partner with the NHS to offer both NHS and self-pay ASD and ADHD services to ensure that we can offer our support to as many people as possible. Autism and ADHD assessments are a key part of our offering that result in a thorough report and signposting to useful resources. Our consultant-led, multi-disciplinary team will work with you to provide actionable insights, no matter where you are in your journey, and offer expert advice to help you or a family member. Our ASD and ADHD services are suitable for both children and adults, meaning that it is never too late to be assessed.

Our services include:

At Wellbeing, it is our goal to make you feel at ease in our clinic venues, and to ensure that your experience is a positive one. The assessments that we provide are not a test with right and wrong answers, but a holistic approach that takes into account previous history, key concerns, and responses on the day.
We have created a new, dedicated website that goes into detail about the process of working towards a diagnosis of autism and neurodivergent conditions, and offers resources written by our clinicians to help you throughout your journey. For more information on our ASD and ADHD services, you can also get in touch with one of our team today.

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Autism Assessment | ASD Services in Essex | Wellbeing

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We understand that a diagnosis of neurological challenges can often be the turning point in being able to access further support, and that obtaining a diagnosis can often be a lengthy process on the NHS.

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Amazing Things Happen - by Alexander Amelines

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We are the UKs leading charity for autistic people and their families. Since 1962, we have been providing support, guidance and advice, as well as campaigning for improved rights, services and opportunities to help create a society that works for autistic people.

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On this page, you'll find information to help you support your child or young person with grief and loss. We've also got advice about where you can find grief support services.

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Guide Menu for Grief and loss

What is grief?

Losing someone we love and feel close to, or going through a bereavement, can be extremely painful. Grief is our natural response to this loss, and it is a process rather than an event.

Your child or young person, as well as you and other family members, may be grieving because:

someone in the family has died, like a parent, grandparent or sibling

their friend or someone at school has died

they have lost someone by suicide

someone they are close to has become ill

a pet has died or been lost

What does grief feel like?

Grief feels different to every individual child or young person. Our feelings around grief also change over time.

It's important to remember that there is no right or wrong way to grieve. It's okay to feel whatever emotion we do, and to process it in our own way. It's a time for being kind and patient with ourselves.

You might sometimes hear people talk about the 'stages of grief' or the 'grief cycle'. These describe some of the common feelings that people who are grieving can experience.

What are the 'stages of grief'?

1. Denial - for example, feeling confused, numb or in shock.

2. Anger - this might be towards the person who has died, or with the world in general.

3. Bargaining - for example, going over things from the past, or feeling guilty or anxious.

4. Depression - this might feel like intense sadness or loneliness about living without the person.

5. Acceptance - this might be feeling more able to live with our grief, rather than feeling we have 'got over it'.

It's important to understand that not everyone experiences all these things, and that we do not move through these stages one-by-one.

We might move forwards or backwards between them, or experience them in any order. Or we might feel different emotions.

Your child or young person might also experience some of the physical signs of grief. These can include:

waves of crying, which can sometimes feel like they come out of the blue

feeling unwell or sick

eating more or less than before

being extremely tired

finding it difficult to get to sleep

finding it difficult to concentrate, including at school

It's helpful to remember that it is normal for your child or young person to feel and experience these things after a loss.

Tips for talking about grief and loss

If your child doesn't want to talk

If your child or young person feels uncomfortable about talking, you could try starting a conversation while doing an activity. This can help them to relax by making it feel less like a 'big chat'. Have a look at our activity suggestions to get some ideas.

It's also okay to give them some space, especially with older children and teenagers. Sometimes it helps to just sit together quietly, or to offer a hand squeeze or hug. Reassure them that it's okay to talk to someone else they trust too.

You can find more tips about talking in our guide.

Helping your child or young person to cope with grief

Supporting your child or young person with a sudden death

When someone they're close to dies suddenly or unexpectedly, children and young people are likely to feel extremely shocked. They may find it impossible to believe that it's happened, or feel numb and empty. They might find it difficult to talk, or to eat or drink. They may experience physical symptoms like tummy aches, headaches and being extremely tired. These reactions are a normal way of coping with huge shock.

In the days and weeks after a sudden death, the most important thing you can do is provide safety and support.

Grief and loss support services

There are lots of organisations who provide counselling and other types of support to families, children and young people after a bereavement.

Sometimes, the grieving process starts before someone dies. For example, when we know they are ill and they are going to die soon. This is sometimes called 'anticipatory grief'. In pre-bereavement counselling, your child or young person can talk through their feelings and worries. Some hospices and other organisations offer this service. Speak to the professionals supporting your family to see what's available.

In bereavement or grief counselling, your child or young person will have a space to talk. They can also start to process some of their feelings around what's happened. You may be able to access this service through:

Let your child or young person know about the grief support services that are available to them via phone, text or online chat. You can find a list of support services below.

Over the longer-term, a counsellor or therapist can listen, provide emotional support and help your child or young person to make sense of their feelings. They can also support them to find ways of coping. You can find out how your child or young person can access counselling and therapy in our guide for parents.

If you have wider concerns about your child's mental health, it's a good idea to speak to the GP about next steps. They can find out more about what's going on and refer your child for more specialist help.

Looking after yourself

Supporting a young person who is grieving can be a very emotional experience. Take time to look after yourself and top up your own batteries when you can. If you are also grieving, things may feel overwhelming at times. Allow space for your own grief too. Remember that it's okay to ask for help from family and friends when you need it.

If you need support with your own grief, or you're struggling to cope, it's really important that you get the help you need. This will make you more able to be there for your child. You can access counselling, helpline support and support groups via the grief services listed below.

Useful helplines and websites

While we take care to ensure that the organisations we signpost to provide high quality information and advice, we cannot take responsibility for any specific pieces of advice they may offer. We encourage parents and carers to always explore the website of a linked service or organisation to understand who they are and what support they offer before engaging with them.

Help us improve our content

Whether you love the page or think something is missing, we appreciate your feedback. It all helps us to support more young people with their mental health.

Please be aware that this form isn't a mental health support service. If your child is in crisis right now and you want to talk to someone urgently, find out who to contact on our urgent help page.

At YoungMinds we take your privacy seriously. If you'd like to read more about how we keep the information we collect safe, take a look at our privacy policy.

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A guide to supporting a child or young person with grief, bereavement or loss, including information about finding grief counselling and other help.

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Children, young people and grief - Cruse Bereavement Support

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Children & young people experience the same sorts of feelings as adults when someone dies. But they may express them differently.

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Children and young people grieve just as much as adults but they show it in different ways. They learn how to grieve by copying the responses of the adults around them, and rely on adults to provide them with the support they need in their grief.
Further guidance that may be helpful:
How might bereaved children react and what may help?

Children and young people have a limited ability to put feelings and thoughts into words and tend to show feelings with behaviours rather than words. Reactions will vary greatly as children absorb and process information in different ways at different ages.

The following reactions are common, and are likely to settle over time with reassurance, acknowledging what has happened and their feelings, giving them clear and age-appropriate information, and keeping to normal routines.

Picking up on tension and distress

Children pick up on tension, distress or anxiety in adults, and may mirror this in their own behaviour. Even babies sense that something important is missing, and may cry more than usual. Children of all ages may be clingy or unsettled.

Appearing not to react

Children under 6 years old do not understand that death is permanent. Children cannot handle strong emotions for long periods, and may jump quickly in and out of grief ('puddle jumping'). When told that someone important has died, some children may look blank and ask 'can I play' or 'what's for tea?' They may have heard, but they are not able to process what that means yet. They may react later with sudden crying, outbursts, changes in behaviour or asking questions.

Asking questions and exploring what death means

Children may ask repeatedly: "When's Nanny coming back?" or "Where has she gone?" even though they've been told clearly what has happened. They may hunt everywhere for a 'lost' person, and so a clear explanation of what 'died' means may help. Children may play games where the person dies, or is still alive. They may seem fascinated with death, play-act about death or ask repeatedly about it. All of these are ways that children show that they are processing their understanding of what has happened.

Feeling anxious or insecure

When someone dies, a child's sense of safety is rocked. They may not want to leave you, and may cling to you or follow you everywhere. They may behave as if they are younger: being very quiet or tearful, having temper flare-ups, sucking their thumb, being reluctant to do things they used to do with confidence, or wetting the bed.

Try to keep to normal routines which will help them feel safe, and keep them informed about plans for the days ahead. Tell them who will take them to school or activities. If you need to leave them, tell them when you will be home, or who will be looking after them.
Include them in simple decision-making that affects them. If the person who died was ill, address any fears about the illness (for example that it is not catching), and reassure them that you are not ill and not leaving them.

Anger

Anger and other strong emotions are natural reactions to sad or shocking news, and some children and young people may not be able to understand or manage their own feelings. They may feel angry at the person who died, at family, at themselves or at the world in general.

It can help to tell them it is understandable for them to be angry, as long as they don't hurt themselves or anyone else. Safe ways to release anger include hitting cushions, vigorous physical exercise, messy painting sessions, or going outside to shout very loudly.

Another idea is a 'safe zone' where they can go to calm down. This could be a quiet corner with familiar items that help them to feel safe.

Looking after adults or feeling responsible

As children realise that death is permanent, they also become aware that it happens to other people including themselves. They may be protective and try to look after their important adults and siblings. They may feel that they were somehow responsible for the death.

Primary aged children may show 'magical thinking' where they think 'if I do this, Dad will come back'. They may behave very well to compensate for what's happened, or be less well-behaved because they feel angry or guilty.

Denying what has happened or taking risks

Bereavement can be overwhelming, and can bring huge changes, alongside other challenges that young people face as they grow up. They may want to forget or deny the death or how strongly they feel. They may feel 'what's the point?' with school or social activities. Some young people may be impulsive or take risks, in an attempt to get back some control in a life that for them currently feels very out of control.

What helps grieving children and young people

Every child is unique and will cope with the death of someone important in their own way. There is no magic formula but things that help include:

Clear, honest and age-appropriate information

Reassurance that they are not to blame and that different feelings are OK

Normal routines and a clear demonstration that important adults are there for them

Time to talk about what has happened, ask questions and build memories

Being listened to and given time to grieve in their own way

Further information

More about how children and young people grieve, and what helps:

Finding support

For many bereaved children and young people, they may get all the support they need from those already around them that they know and trust. However, some children and young people may need additional support depending on their situation.

Latest

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Short films delivered by our support practitioners giving guidance on a range of bereavement topics. Read more

A list of books and resources relating to grief and bereavement and what may help. Read more

Watch short films and read experiences of bereaved families and how support has helped them. Read more

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Supporting bereaved children and young people

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Children and young people grieve just as much as adults but they show it in different ways. Find out how you can help them and more about child grieving.

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Winston's Wish is the UK's childhood bereavement charity. We support children and their families after the death of someone important.

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Anxiety is one of the most common mental health conditions experienced by children and young people and can be devastating for the whole family. While it's normal for everyone to worry at times, anxiety disorders are much more serious and can significantly affect your child's life.

In 2020, research from the NHS discovered that the proportion of children experiencing a probable mental disorder (including anxiety and depression) has increased over the past three years, from one in nine (10.8%) in 2017 to one in six (16%) in 2020.

When exploring how Lockdown has affected children and young people's stress and anxiety, the Children's Commissioner found that smaller stressors - including anxiety about appearance, bullying and tests - have been overtaken with a particular focus on Covid-19 and its secondary impact on schoolwork, health, social lives and employment opportunities.

Our Neurodevelopmental Specialist, Emma Woodhouse, outlines some simple strategies you can use to support your child or young person if they are suffering with anxiety and help them feel more in control.

1. Ask: "Where can you feel it?"

Sometimes people find it difficult to identify their emotions. They may be aware that they don't feel 'good', but for some people it is hard to know whether that feeling is sadness, anxiety, frustration, or a combination of different emotions. If a young person struggles to identify the emotion, it may be difficult for them to describe or communicate how they feel.

We often experience anxious emotions in our bodies, like that uncomfortable feeling in your stomach lurch just before a big presentation. Children and young people are no different. Asking your child to point to where they feel their anxiety can help them to understand their emotions. It can also help to ask questions like what shape is it? What colour? Is it spiky or smooth? You could even encourage your child to 'draw' their anxiety.

Emma explains, "I think it's important for parents to think about their timing if they want to bring up sensitive topics like anxiety (or emotions more generally). The time that feels right for the parent might not be the best time for their son/daughter. It may be helpful to try and talk to them whilst simultaneously engaged in an activity (e.g. a walk, cooking something together, drawing / art, gardening). If they have watched a film or television programme featuring anxiety, it could be helpful to discuss that with them and hear their thoughts. It can feel more 'removed' and less 'threatening' if the conversations are more general, rather than specifically about their own anxieties."

2. 'Fire alarm'

Describing to your child how their anxieties are like a fire alarm can be helpful. You might say something like, "How many times do the fire alarms in the house go off but without a fire?" Helping them understand that their anxiety response is a way of their body, misguidedly, preparing them for a problem can help them understand that the response is often not needed.

3. Don't dismiss their worries

Many parents are struggling with their own worries, particularly during the pandemic. Your child's worries may seem minor in comparison, but it's important not to trivialise your child's fears. Even if their worries seem 'silly' or disproportionate to you, they can feel overwhelming for a child. Saying things like, "I can hear how worrying this is to you," allows them to feel heard and not judged. This will make them more comfortable in opening up to you.

Emma explains, "Sometimes it can be helpful to think about practical strategies and it is completely natural for parents to want to offer solutions for their child's problems. However, a child needs to feel heard if they are going to share their worries. I came across a quote several years ago and it stuck with me because I think there is a lot of truth in it: "The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply".

4. Empathise

Your child probably feels alone in their anxious feelings and might think they are the only ones who feel this way. This can be incredibly isolating. Depression often accompanies anxiety, so thinking of a time that you have also felt anxiety and talking about it can help your child feel less alone.

5. List their worries

Sit down with your child or young person to write down or draw a list of the things that worry them, however small they might be. Just remember not to judge. Come back a day or week later and see if any of those worries have come true. The likelihood is they haven't and even if they have, the consequences were probably manageable.

6. Seek help

Emma believes that avoidance maintains anxiety. "The more people avoid the things that make them anxious, the less confident they feel in their ability to cope when they face the anxiety provoking situation. Any steps to increase exposure to the anxiety provoking situations must be very gradual, otherwise they can feel too overwhelming. It is also important to consider the thoughts and feelings behind the anxiety."

There are lots of strategies that can help your child, and some young people may grow out of their fears. However, if anxiety goes untreated, it can stay with a young person as they transition into adulthood. Anxiety can prevent them from enjoying life to the full and may even prevent them from attending school or making friends. Professional help from a child psychiatrist or psychologist can be incredibly useful in helping your child to manage and overcome their anxiety. Treatment options differ for each child so getting a thorough assessment is the first important step.

Further Advice

At Clinical Partners, our specialist clinicians have years of clinical experience in tailor making the right support for children, young people and adults with Anxiety. To find out more about what's available, visit our Anxiety hub or call the team on 0203 326 9160.

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6 top tips for helping your anxious child

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Anxiety is one of the most common mental health conditions experienced by children and young people and can be devastating for the whole family. While it's normal for everyone to worry at times, anxiety disorders are much more serious and can significantly affect your child's life.

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When children are chronically anxious, even the most well-meaning parents, not wanting a child to suffer, can actually make the youngster's anxiety worse. It happens when parents try to protect kids from their fears. Here are pointers for helping children escape the cycle of anxiety.

None of us wants to see a child unhappy, but the best way to help kids overcome anxiety isn't to try to remove stressors that trigger it. It's to help them learn to tolerate their anxiety and function as well as they can, even when they're anxious. And as a byproduct of that, the anxiety will decrease over time.

Helping children avoid the things they are afraid of will make them feel better in the short term, but it reinforces the anxiety over the long run. Let's say a child in an uncomfortable situation gets upset and starts to cry - not to be manipulative, but just because that's how they feel. If their parents whisk them out of there, or remove the thing they're afraid of, the child has learned that coping mechanism. And that cycle has the potential to repeat itself.

You can't promise a child that their fears are unrealistic-that they won't fail a test, that they'll have fun ice skating, or that another child won't laugh at them during show & tell. But you can express confidence that they're going to be okay, that they will be able to manage it. And you can let them know that as they face those fears, the anxiety level will drop over time. This gives them confidence that your expectations are realistic, and that you're not going to ask them to do something they can't handle.

It's important to understand that validation doesn't always mean agreement. So if a child is terrified about going to the doctor because they're due for a shot, you don't want to belittle those fears, but you also don't want to amplify them. You want to listen and be empathetic, help them understand what they're anxious about, and encourage them to feel that they can face their fears. The message you want to send is, "I know you're scared, and that's okay, and I'm here, and I'm going to help you get through this."

Encourage your child to talk about their feelings, but try not to ask leading questions- "Are you anxious about the big test? Are you worried about the science fair?" To avoid feeding the cycle of anxiety, just ask open-ended questions: "How are you feeling about the science fair?"

What you don't want to do is be saying, with your tone of voice or body language: "Maybe this is something that you should be afraid of." Let's say a child has had a negative experience with a dog. Next time they're around a dog, you might be anxious about how they will respond, and you might unintentionally send a message that they should, indeed, be worried.

Let your child know that you appreciate the work it takes to tolerate anxiety in order to do what they want or need to do. It's really encouraging them to engage in life and to let the anxiety take its natural curve. We call it the "habituation curve." That means that it will drop over time as he continues to have contact with the stressor. It might not drop to zero, it might not drop as quickly as you would like, but that's how we get over our fears.

When we're afraid of something, the hardest time is really before we do it. So another rule of thumb for parents is to really try to eliminate or reduce the anticipatory period. If a child is nervous about going to a doctor's appointment, you don't want to launch into a discussion about it two hours before you go; that's likely to get your child more keyed up. So just try to shorten that period to a minimum.

Sometimes it helps to talk through what would happen if a child's fear came true-how would they handle it? A child who's anxious about separating from their parents might worry about what would happen if a parent didn't come to pick them up. So we talk about that. If your mom doesn't come at the end of soccer practice, what would you do? "Well I would tell the coach my mom's not here." And what do you think the coach would do? "Well he would call my mom. Or he would wait with me." A child who's afraid that a stranger might be sent to pick them up can have a code word from their parents that anyone they sent would know. For some kids, having a plan can reduce the uncertainty in a healthy, effective way.

There are multiple ways you can help kids handle anxiety by letting them see how you cope with anxiety yourself. Kids are perceptive, and they're going to take it in if you keep complaining on the phone to a friend that you can't handle the stress or the anxiety. I'm not saying to pretend that you don't have stress and anxiety, but let kids hear or see you managing it calmly, tolerating it, feeling good about getting through it.

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What to Do (and Not Do) When Children Are Anxious - Child Mind Institute

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How to help a child with anxiety? We bring expert parenting advice on assisting children to escape the cycle of anxiety. Learn what to do and not to do, anxiety treatments, and behavioral modification techniques.

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Place2Be is a children and young people's mental health charity with almost 30 years' experience working with pupils, families and staff in UK schools.

We provide mental health support in schools through one-to-one and group counselling using tried and tested methods backed by research. In addition, we also offer expert training and professional qualifications.

Why it's important

1 in 5

children and young people have a probable mental health condition, and many continue to have these problems into adulthood.

50%

of those with lifetime mental health problems first experience symptoms by the age of 14.

1 in 10
boys aged 5-19 with a mental health condition are suspended in some form from school.

Find out more about our work

How we help

Mental health support in schools

Our in-school mental health service supports the wellbeing of pupils, families and staff.
Find out more

Our mental health services in schools

We provide mental health services in schools that contribute to a whole-school approach to mental health.
Find out more

Counselling training and placements

Gain experience and skills with our child counselling training and placements.
Find out more

Place2Be is part of our school family. It is more than an office, more than a therapy room and more than a collection of counsellors.

Glyn Ellis - Headteacher, Haslingden Primary School

My daughter had become a different person - one we didn't recognise - but since counselling we see signs of our old loving daughter coming back.

Parent

If you have problems or worries you get a chance to talk to a person you trust. When I grow up I want to help children like Place2Be helps children.

Eight-year-old girl

Your support makes it possible

Thousands of vulnerable children and families depend on our work every single day. We simply cannot reach them without your help. There are so many ways to lend your support.

Place2Be's counselling service in primary schools has the potential to return £8 to society by improving long-term outcomes for each child.

Make a donation

How you can help

Fundraise for us

Raise money to transform children and young people's mental health. Browse ideas, tips and advice.

Get fundraising inspiration

Take part in an event

Run, cycle, walk. Trek to great heights or tackle some muddy obstacles. Take a look at our fundraising events.

Take on an event

Partner with us

See how your organisation can help us to support more children, families and school staff across the UK.

Find out more

Our impact

In the last school year

6,901

pupils were supported through one-to-one counselling.

33,327

pupils booked their own appointments o speak to our mental health professional.

After one-to-one counselling with Place2Be

76%

of children with severe difficulties show an improvement in mental health, according to parents.

64%

of pupils whose difficulties impacted their learning in class improved, according to teachers.

75%

of children and young people found it easier to make and keep friends, according to parents and carers.

Place2Be: mental health support in schools

Hear from children and teachers about the impact of Place2Be.

News & blogs

Eating Disorders in Children and Young People: a major public health concern

Clara Faria and Professor Tamsin Ford reflect on the impact of eating disorders on children and young people's mental health.

Read more

New report from NHS England shows increase in children experiencing mental health difficulties

Published today, the report reveals that 1 in 5 children and young people now have a probable mental health condition.

Read more

The BAFTA Roadshow with Place2Be arrives in North-West London

BAFTA and Place2Be team up to bring the BAFTA Roadshow to North-West London.

Read more

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Improving children's and young people's mental health - Place2Be

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Place2Be provides mental health counselling support and training to schools to improve the emotional wellbeing of children, young people, families, teachers and staff.

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Why is this happening?

How do I help them to learn to handle their feelings?

Where do I start?

As a therapist with 20 years of experience and a mom of 2, I create practical resources with an organized way to explore lots of different styles of coping skills.

Tons of ideas

Just as our children learn in different ways, they also cope in different ways - a "one size fits all" approach isn't helpful. There are tons of coping skills ideas you can explore through the products here.

Organized

We divide our coping skills up into different styles: Relaxation, Distraction, Sensory, Movement, and Processing. This allows children to explore strategies that fit with their personality.

Useful in different settings

These resources can work in a therapy setting, at school, or at home.

VISUAL REMINDERS

The Coping Cue Cards are visual reminders to use coping skills when they are having a hard time. These can be placed in a desk at school, on the fridge, or in a counselor's office, or Our Reset Space.

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Coping Skills for Kids has products and resources to help parents and professionals teach children healthy ways to cope with stress, anxiety and anger.

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YoungMinds | Mental Health Charity For Children And Young People

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YoungMinds are a mental health charity for children, young people and their parents, making sure all young people can get the mental health support they need.

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Talking about Mental Health with your Child

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Talking about Mental Health with your Child

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Southend, Essex and Thurrock Children's and Adolescent's Mental Health Service

Who are we?

The Southend, Essex and Thurrock Children's and Adolescent's Mental Health Service (SET CAMHS) provides advice and support to children, young people and families who are in need of support with their emotional wellbeing or mental health difficulties.

The service covers Southend, Essex and Thurrock and is open to young people between the ages of 0-18, or up to 25 for those with special educational needs.

Any child or young person experiencing mental health difficulties as well as any parent, guardian or professional can access the service for help and guidance.

There are lots of ways to access the service.

A child or young person can contact us directly

Any parent/guardian or professional such as a teacher, school nurse or GP can contact us on the behalf of the young person

When the service can help?

Everyone goes through ups and downs, but sometimes feelings or behaviours can start to get in the way of day-to-day living. When this happens, it might be time to seek some help.

We can support people with a range of mental health difficulties faced by young people, which can include:

Low mood

Anxiety

Obsessional thoughts

Sleep problems

Body image and eating difficulties

Behavioural and emotional difficulties

Trauma and loss

Parenting and family difficulties

These are some of the things we can help you with. If we feel SET CAMHS is not right to help your particular need, then we can put you in contact with a number of different organisations who might be more appropriate.

What the service can do

SET CAMHS offer a range of both individual and group talking therapies such as;

CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy)

DBT (Dialectical Behavioural therapy)

Trauma focused therapies

Play based therapies

Art and creative therapies

Psycho-dynamic therapy

Family therapy

Group Therapy

Medication

Journey through the service

Waiting times may vary but we aim to see people within 12 weeks. However, if you find that things become more stressful while you are waiting to be seen, contact us as soon as possible so we are able to provide support.

Useful online resources

MiLife

MiLife; is an online help service designed by young people from Essex with useful information and links to other organisations that work with young people.

Kooth

Kooth; is an online mental health service for children and young people which offers online counselling and emotional-wellbeing support.

For a full list of NHS approved online self-help services visit the website link here.

Important contact details

To contact the service between the hours of 9am-5pm, Monday to Friday, you or someone on your behalf can;

Call SET CAMHS: Freephone 0800 953 0222

Email: SET-CAMHS.referrals@nelft.nhs.uk

If you need urgent help or out of hours help; call NELFT out of hours: 0300 555 1200

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Southend, Essex and Thurrock (SET) CAMHS

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Southend, Essex and Thurrock (SET) CAMHS service provides emotional
wellbeing and mental health advice and support for young people and
their families across Southend, Essex and Thurrock.

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Chat Now Your login details have been used by another user or machine. Login details can only be used once at any one time so you have therefore automatically been logged out. Please contact your sites administrator if you believe this other user or machine has unauthorised access.

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Ten percent of the population are believed to be dyslexic, but it is still often poorly understood. With the right support, the strengths and talents of dyslexic people can really shine.

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Ten percent of the population are believed to be dyslexic, but it is still often poorly understood.

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SEND Family Bulletin - SEND Family Bulletin June Edition

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Essex Educational Psychology (EP) Service

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Essex Educational Psychology (EP) Service

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Many Essex EPs have specialist skills in areas such as autism, behaviour, literacy and mental health. An EP might be a good choice to help with significant learning or behaviour difficulties which are complicated, difficult to understand or have not improved with the support already in place.

Open to:

children and young people up to 25

families

pre-schools, schools and colleges

Parents and young people with concerns about their child's, their own learning or other psychological needs can contact the helpline.

An EP will listen to your concerns and discuss ideas, and help you consider what to do next.

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Essex Educational Psychology (EP) Service

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Many Essex EPs have specialist skills in areas such as autism, behaviour, literacy and mental health. An EP might be a good choice to help with significant learning or behaviour difficulties which are complicated, difficult to understand or have not improved with the support already in place.

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SEND (special educational needs and disabilities) resources, activities and support to help parents support their family.

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Essex County Council: Special Educational Needs and Disabilities (SEND) | Essex Local Offer

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