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Hi please can someone help me, I dont trust anyone enough to tell them this.
When I was in grade 10 and for the first time in my life I felt atracted to a girl. Since the first time I saw her I felt something, but I ignored that feeling thinking that it's nothing and probably it's because she's pretty. I never told anyone about it. since then three years passed and I got into college. During these years I focused on my studies and I felt attracted to some girls on social media .Surprisingly My college had alot of lesbian girls and they all talk about it so openly. It was my first time around lesbian girls. I don't mean to offend anyone but during my first year I didn't really accept them, but when I did I started feeling attracted again , I started noticing girls more, wanting to hold hands, hug girls, but I always pushed that feeling away until today When I saw my friend looking at someone, I felt jealous , or I think I did. I couldn't concentrate in my class just thinking about the way she looked at her and the way I feel about it. During my whole life I thought that I am straight and that I would never feel anything to a girl, Im not saying that I like my friend in that way, I am just confused.I am trying so hard to push these thoughts away and convince my self that its nothing but I dont know what to do anymore. Why ?

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I hate to be ignored from the person that i loved.

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As a kid I grew up going to kindergarten, then grade school and then highschool. I lived my life following the path of what was accepted in society and continued school as a student because I believed it would lead to a good future. But it’s not always like that. Having following rules every since I was a kid and deciding on things based on what was accepted, I have now come to the conclusion that I can’t really decide for myself. I have hobbies, likes and dislikes but when it comes to major decisions I honestly can’t figure out what to do. When I think of a certain path or a job as my future career I keep thinking, will I be happy? is this really what I want? and the thought that hits me the most is... will I regret it.

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The life is not easy its like the exam from god to us  so we must take it as a lessons learn from it t and we must trust to God, when we facing difficulties in our life that really will gives us challenge and energy to continue life normally.

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you matter

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not confident, can't reach my goals

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I keep overthinking, stressing and crying

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Don’t need tell

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I can’t get out of the friendzone. I feel really bad, I can’t handle seeing the one I love with somebody else and act normal like nothing bad is happening and this breaks my heart alot. I always try not to cry and just smile and convince myself thay im okay but im really not, im so sad I can’t leave her and at the same time i cant be with her I really dont know what to do... I’m lost  i need someone to understand me, feel me and be with me. I just want to talk about it just to feel better, but no one is here for me, I have no friends and no one listens to me i feel sooo lonely and the only thing that i need is just a hug, is it too much to ask for?

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I have been suffering from anxiety for a long time, it’s horrible.

I used to get panic attacks in the middle of the class, people start asking what’s wrong, but it’s so hard to explain.

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I want to kill myself.

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I’ve been going through a harsh case of insomnia since I was 5 years old. I can’t stop my thoughts from hindering my sleep and it gets difficult for me to concentrate and remember things when I study..

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I deal with self-harm .. and i have suicidal thoughts sometimes ...

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You wish that you did not even exsest..you are trying to understand how life is to be positive as possible but you can’t and it gets worse..you feel jealous of those people who enjoy their lifes and acsepet it but they don’t deserve it.

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There are times I wonder if someone actually cares for me or remembers me at times. You know ask me how I've been and such. Unfortunately, it has always been me who starts a conversation. It's always been me who asks how they've been. Even keeping me in company never crossed their minds. I realized that maybe these were just friends who are empty and feed off me. Which is why I stopped caring about seeking attention from friends and focus on myself more. Ask myself how am I doing? Keep myself in company. Also temporarily be friends with others depending on how they've treated me. Not seeking for revenge though. Instead I'm finding a better me and hopefully better relationships despite what I've been through. In the end, being social is a part of our identity as humans since the beginning of time.

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I have been stressing out for over 8 years, it feels really bad and I hate it. Some times I wish I could die just to get eid of being stressed and I feel that bo one can feel it. Do not judge me believe it too hard

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I’ve been molasted when I was a child by distant family member. 

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I’ve been molasted when I was a child by distant family member. 

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it was really hard to swallow now im grown up..

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I want to kill myself.

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Although it may feel like you are sometimes. There is always someone around you who can help you feel better, wether it’s a friend , best friend or a family member. People who love you will accept you for who you are and will want to help you if something is bothering you, reach out and you’ll be surprised by how understanding someone is. You are not alone and you have so much strength within you to fight your own demons and to live the life you want to live.

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I’ll support you no matter what happens

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I’ll be your shoulder when you have no one 

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I’ll be your shoulder when you have no one 

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This is a lovely message and I support it whole