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Hey Sarah! I also did a golden line for my response in a different Padlet! I think it is a great thing to have more positive feedback for students! I like how you ask them to sort of model this sentence for the rest of their revision as a away to put them towards adjusting the other sentences in their work without explicitly stating it!

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I also chose the Praise, Question, Polish method! This seems like a great way to encourage students without editing their paper too in-depth.
While we chose the same method, it appears we took very different approaches. I would like to know more about what you mean in your "question" section, as special education is only mentioned twice in relevant situations. I think the writer would benefit more with a little more detail, so they can know specifically what to adjust.
I had a similar thought with your "polish" section, as a student practicing their writing skills may not understand what you mean by "make the sentences flow more." They may not understand how to do this, where to incorporate this change, or even see the issue with choppy sentences. Again, I think a little more specificity would be super helpful for students.
This was my first experience with Praise, Question, Polish and I can see this being a useful tool in any classroom!

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I really liked this response because it is firm in noting the things that could improve but they are stated in a way that is encouraging and shows that you are there to support the student through the revision process. Sometimes I am hesitant to say "we" or "let's" because I want students to feel like they own the work, but if it makes them feel like you are on the road with them I think it can be very helpful. (I wasn't sure if we were commenting or connecting.)

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Praise: I can appreciate the purpose of this prompt. I can feel the passion and drive that Marta has by reading the prompt.
Question: Can we dive a little deeper into what she will learn through this position- so readers can connect with Marta?
Polish: Lets clean up fragment sentences and look for way to elevate the writing through improved vocabulary.

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Praise: Marta puts a lot of detail into this subject. I can tell that they have a lot of passion and are very knowledgeable about the subject!

Question: How can Marta organize this information in a way that sounds less choppy?

Polish: There are some grammar issues and there isn't any variety in the length of their sentences. In order to make this section more polished, Martha should fix the grammar issues.

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Praise: I appreciate the passion Martha has for working with special needs students! This warms my heart to read, and I believe the prompt did a fantastic job explaining who Martha is.
Question: Is this camp a specific age group? Is Martha wanting a career focused in this field?
Polish: While analyzing the paragraph I noticed it is a little choppy. A suggestion I would say could be adding commas and transitions so the sentences flow more easily.

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Golden Line: The camp is a special camp for children with physical and mental disadvantages.
This is a great line because it is complex, unlike many of the others, and has no spelling errors. I would encourage you to make other great sentences like this one during your revision!

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Praise: I like all the examples that Martha has about what she is passionate about. Martha talks about the camp and the kids she works with  which is a good addition that isn't what she does with her family but an actual hobbies she has.
Question: Is she attending this camp because of her future in special education or because it is fun for her? Or both?
Polish: Something that might need to be fixed the flow of the paragraph. It seems very choppy and more like a list. Just use commas next time and maybe dive in more to each activity, like what part you play in running the camp.

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Praise: I appreciate all the specific examples given and the depth with which you went into the explanation of Marta's career choice. Specificity can be important in telling a good story!
Question: How can you further analyze why these specific experiences are related to Marta's career choice?
Polish: Focus on subject-verb agreement. I see three big moments where you have a single subject and a plural verb or helping verb.

I praised the details because a lot of students don't use those when they write, especially on seemingly simple topics. I asked about analysis then to take that skill a step further and ask the student to make clear connections. I put SV agreement for "polish" because it was the most distracting grammar error to me and was relatively consistent. It is important to see positive feedback because if a student is constantly hit immediately with the negative they can lose motivation or assume they are bad at writing and not want to do anymore. We need to know that some things are working. This feedback can make the student a better writer because it can help them build on their strengths and turn them into something even more successful. It also helps them narrow their revision focus to something specific and manageable.

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Praise: Marta shows passion for this subject and it is very heartwarming to hear. It shows her character and personality.
Question: How does special education affect Marta? Does it revolve around the kids, disadvantages, etc.?
Polish: So many grammatical issues that it is hard to read. Subject-verb agreement issues, tense issues, and simply words that are not needed.

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Praise: I appreciate the detail provided about Marta! In this short paragraph, readers have learned several important facts about who she is and what she does.
Question: How can you add more variety to this story? Can you use more colorful adjectives to describe the kids at camp or Marta? Can you edit the sentences to make them less choppy and create a smoother flow?
Polish: Take a moment to review your paragraph. I notice a few grammatical errors throughout, but I think you could fix these if. you combed through the paragraph a few times. Be conscious of verb tense as well: "they goes bowl" should be "they go bowling."

This feedback allows the student to re-read their paragraph, acknowledge grammar mistakes, and highlights an aspect they did well. This will provide positive feedback because there is no negative language included and I begin with praising an aspect of the story. In the "question" section, I encourage her to develop the writing to a greater level without directly telling her what she did wrong. This way, she is encouraged to improve her writing without hearing negatives.

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Praise- I liked all the information given.
Question- why is special education mentioned multiple times?
Polish- lots of grammar mistakes and I would try to make the sentences flow more.

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In this Padlet, we would like you to look at one of the prompts and use one of the strategies below to edit or craft the prompts given. Explain your corrections, why it is important and how it will provide positive feedback for your students to become stronger writers. Some of the writing strategies to highlight can be: PQP response, COPS response and the Golden Line method. Refer back to the google slides for information about these.

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Marta is a sophomore college. She is working on a degree in Special Education. She works as a camp councilor every summer. The camp is a special camp for children with physical and mental disadvantages. Marta helps the kids get exercise and make better their social skills. She takes the kids swimming every afternoon in the summer. They goes bowl once a week. The children really  like the camping out in tents. Marta always have wanted work with kids with disabilities. She is looking forward to a career in Special Education.