# data[].attributes.body
The text could benefit from the use of transition words and phrases to connect ideas and improve the overall coherence. Including words such as"furthermore" can help guide the reader through the argument more effectively. By addressing this writing problems, my text can become more cohesive, persuasive, and engaging for the reader.

# data[].attributes.body
I think I spend too much time reading articles, so I need to strengthen my skimming skills. Skimming and scanning are important techniques for quickly finding information in a text. Practicing these techniques can help you save time during the exam.

# data[].attributes.body
Writing could benefit from smoother transitions between paragraphs to enhance the overall flow of ideas. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph directly relates to your main argument and supports it effectively. There are a few grammatical errors and awkward sentence structures throughout the essay.

# data[].attributes.body
Introduction: The professional manpowers who participate in the work like doctors and teachers in poor countries are leaving for a better life in more developed countries.

Problems: This kind of situation can cause the outflow of talent which can leads to the issue of destroying a country in many perspectives.

Solution:  I personally think if the government want to deal with the problem, they should promote some more beneficial policies for the talents.

Conclusion: The outflow of professionals are searching better living standards in better countries could lead to many problems.

# data[].attributes.body
There are several grammatical errors and awkward sentence structures throughout the article. For example, the sentence "From the bar graph, we can discern a dramatic rise in both the numbers of overseas visits by Australian residents and visits to Australia by overseas residents" could be revised to "The bar graph reveals a significant increase in both the number of overseas visits by Australian residents and visits to Australia by overseas residents."

# data[].attributes.body
I sometimes make generalizations and assumptions without providing sufficient reasoning or evidence. For instance, the passage assumes that if the government controls scientific research, it will automatically improve ethical standards. It is important to provide more specific explanations and evidence to support such claims.

# data[].attributes.body
The passage contains several sentences that are unclear or lack coherence. For example, the sentence "According to the chart, the main cost of the whole process of studying is especially most expensive for individual that accounts for about 40%" is confusing and difficult to understand. It is unclear what "individual that accounts for about 40%" refers to.

# data[].attributes.body
Compared to the paragraph before I rewrote it, I feel that I could have used more different sentences.Moreover, I also need to use more different vocabulary to help me improve the reading level of my essay. Most importantly, of course, I think I need to make my handwriting as nice as possible before I take the test.

# data[].attributes.body
The passage switches between past and present tense. It's important to maintain consistency in verb tense throughout the passage. The passage mentions a "slight decrease" and a "sharp increase" in the number of meetings, but it does not provide specific numbers or percentages to support these claims. Adding specific data from the graph would enhance the analysis.

# data[].attributes.body
After I finished my ELSS IELTS practice, the examiner said I could have been more varied in my word choices. Secondly, of course, all pauses in speech need to be noted. However, overall my speaking part was pretty good and I didn't have too many problems with grammar.

# data[].attributes.body
I should work on enriching your vocabulary, especially in areas commonly covered in the IELTS speaking test, such as describing people, places, experiences, and emotions. Moreover, Using appropriate intonation and stress in my speech to convey meaning effectively. Staying updated on current events and global issues is important, as these topics are often included in the speaking test.

# data[].attributes.body
The description switches between past and present tense. It would be more consistent to use past tense throughout since the changes are being described in relation to the past (from before to now). The description could benefit from the use of transition words to improve the flow and coherence of the sentences. For example, using words like "Furthermore" or "Lastly" can help connect ideas and make the writing more cohesive.

# data[].attributes.body
Inconsistent Verb Tenses: The description switches between past and present tense. It would be more consistent to use past tense throughout since the changes are being described in relation to the past (from 2020 to 2023).

# data[].attributes.body
In the second paragraph, the sentence "There are numerous examples of tourism significantly benefiting the local economy, especially in impoverished nations" could be improved by specifying some of these examples to add more depth to my argument. For example, I could mention specific countries or regions where tourism has had a significant positive impact on the local economy.

# data[].attributes.body
I have used some words for many times such as 'milk' about 12 times. It's hard not to repeat key terms in Academic Task 1, but check to see if it's possible to replace some instances with synonyms. Moreover, a better balance of common and advanced cohesives will help me improve my range of sentence types.

# data[].attributes.body
I have only used two sentence types. I should include a variety of simple, compound, and complex sentences. Also, revise fragmented sentences to include a conjugated verb. Moreover, my grammar still need some more improvement

# data[].attributes.body
I am still not able to understand some of the words that appear in the text so I should strengthen my vocabulary skills so that I can understand the text better. Secondly, I think I can strengthen my vocabulary by writing down the words I don't know in my notebook every time in the future. Multiple choice questions are also an area that I need to strengthen.

# data[].attributes.body
I think I still have a lot of room for improvement in this speaking test because it has been a long time since I last took the IELTS test. I think the most important thing that I need to improve on is the pause in my answers, when I should try to continue rather than making the "uh-uh-uh" sound. I think the most important thing that I need to improve is the pause in my answers.

# data[].attributes.body
In this IELTS test practice, I think my biggest mistake was the spelling of the words because a lot of words were clearly heard but misspelled. Secondly, I think I need to work on my listening accuracy because I accidentally wrote the answer to one question into the next blank, which shows that I "lost" more listening during the listening process.

# data[].attributes.body
What I think I need to enhance and improve in this IELTS Writing Part 2 is that when I am writing my counter-arguments and pro-arguments, I should give more examples to help me further my arguments.

# data[].attributes.body
Since this is the first writing task in the classes and I haven't attend the IELTS test for a long time. There's also a serious problem in my sentence structure. What I think I also need to improve in this IELTS writing exercise is the repetition of vocabulary and sentence structure.