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Notice she uses an academic point of view (no “I”, “me”, “you” ). Her response demonstrates that she has read and understands the lesson we had on tone; she finds examples from both sources that best support her claims and analyzes them. She also shows that she understands there is a difference between citing a quote from an article versus a video based on her citations.

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The strength of this draft introduction is that the writer creates an interesting hook that connects the text to real life. She also gives a brief summary of the points she will elaborate on in different body paragraphs of her paper. It would make a great rough draft for the research paper introduction paragraph.

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"Hello Emily, I usually struggle answering prompts, and that leads me to resort to answering with something unrelated, so I applaud you for tackling both questions in the prompt and also highlighting the argument by character used (ethos) in your thesis. One thing I think you can do to improve your introductory paragraph is something I heard from our professor in Module 7.3, which says to start off by making a connection to real life at the beginning to hook the reader (0:38). Nonetheless, I think you have a great introductory paragraph."

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This writer shows that they have read and understand the lesson on connotations in this post by finding an example of one from the text (although it is important to note the chapter referenced is from the point of view of Kimmerer's daughter, not Kimmerer herself). Notice, too, how he uses academic point of view by not using first or second person pronouns (“I”, “me”, “you”). The writer analyzes word choice from the text to make an inference and show critical thinking. This is a skill that will be needed in our essays.

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Emelly's paper can actually be under any of the other headings here as a good example! In particular, note that she related the essay topic to real life then gave a summary of the text to move into the specifics of her  thesis by the end of the introduction paragraph. Because the hook is related to real life and poses a question, it is more likely to be interesting to readers. The thesis is great in that is serves as a map for her paper. One area we are working on is making sure none of our paragraphs go over a page -- to do that in the intro specifically, we can make the summary of points in the thesis a bit more concise.
Her body paragraphs are strong because she selects relevant quotes that she breaks down and analyzes very well in each paragraph. Notice that the quotes do not take up more space in her body paragraphs than her analysis. In other words, her essay demonstrates her ability to go beyond summary and really dig into critically thinking about the text.

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Spotlight on...More Anonymous Feedback =) 

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Spotlight on...More Anonymous Feedback =) 

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"A glow that I noticed in your introductory paragraph is how you mentioned the importance of the teachings educators practice and how it affects the new generation of students. A grow that I would suggest you add is a brief summary of the chapter you are analyzing including the textbook title and author. Also, reference "Preparing for Week 7: Essay #2" to ensure that the chapter you selected to analyze can be used to complete this essay. A glow that I noticed in your thesis statement was the reasoning you provided to support your stance such as self-restraint, how to show gratitude, and reciprocity. A  grow that I suggest you can make is to include the last sentence of your introductory paragraph as the "so what" in your thesis. Also, evaluate how Kimmerer establishes ethos with her word choices and how the chapter communicates what there is to learn from "Tending Sweetgrass" to ensure that you are answering the prompt fully. Overall, Great Job."

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She demonstrates her skill in determining fact from opinion, as well as using in-text citations. Both skills will come in handy when she analyzes textual evidence in her essays. Notice that her responses to others don't just agree with others but provides also provides relevant examples to support her replies.

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A great example of what an MLA formatted page looks like, including 12 pt font in Times New Roman font, double spaced (no random extra spaces between paragraphs), headers with last name and page number. The textual evidence is cited/punctuated carefully. It meets the minimum requirement of 4 full pages of this assignment.

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This essay also demonstrates great organization of body paragraphs and the textual analysis in each body one. Writer  gives context/introduction for quotes, then breaks down the textual evidence making sure to link it back to the topic sentences in their respective paragraphs. Notice that these strategies help them make sure they are very clearly answering the Essay prompt throughout the essay.