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I made something special for Kijani! ^w^

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Tomorrow is Kijani and I's anniversary! ^w^ I'm excited!!!

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No one sees, but its always December in me

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I think it could be happening again but... I don't think it is... I don't know...

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I'm having that... Weird feeling again... Could it be?- No...

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I dunno how I feel anymore

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*Cries*

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I want a hug :(

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I dunno how I feel anymore

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I feel like screaming till I can't breathe anymore

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I haven't posting any recent thoughts because the only thoughts I've been having lately are BDSM cause I'm a horny little shit-

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I think I want a girlfriend- (Along with Alixx, I would never leave Alixx)

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Fucking wanna beat the shit out of something

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I feel fucking great :)

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CONFUSED ABOUT MY FUCKING FEELINGS AGAIN, okay so for a fucking LONG TIME I've had a crush on Cam, I told him last year and he told me he had feelings for me but we never got together cause even tho Cam was Polyamory, I wasn't and I was with Christian plus his girlfriend Bria has so many things going on we felt it would be too much, so we never actually did anything and we pushed our feelings away and held them down under water till they stopped living- Yes I know what I said, but thats how it felt, it felt like we killed our feelings, but right now (For me at least) FEELINGS ARE BEING REVIVED and its making me take my anger out on people cause I'm trying to put my feelings back under the water but they keep coming up to the surface for air, I'm trying to push them down and down but they keep coming up for air, I want them to stop so I don't ruin his life and/or ruin our friendship, I wanna scream and cry and slam my head against something, I'm so scared, I'm confused, what the fuck do I do?...

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Kinda wanna dai

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Not that sad today, I feel better ^^

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Had a mental break down, I feel better now, I'm way fucking better now, all my emotions are out and I'm a little happier venting to a new friend

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I never fucking wanted to kill myself so fucking bad, it hurts, I fucking hate dumbass cunts, I fucking hate life, I'm sick of everyone pushing me the fuck around

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So FUCKING pissed right now, I wanna yell at the top of my fucking lungs and scream at everyone I see but I can't FUCKING do that because its bad to take your anger out of others who didn't do jack shit to you but its fiiiiiiiiiine I'll just bottle my emotions anyways not like any of it matterssss it was his cousinnnnnnnn BITCH SHUT THE FUCK UP IF YOU DON'T WANNA BE WITH ME AND JUST WANNA FUCK THEN GO FUCK YASELF CAUSE I AIN'T DOING THAT SHIT LIKE WHAT THE FUCK I'M SO FUCKING ANGRY I COULD JUST CHOKE MYSELF- Anyways y'all have a good rest of your fucking niiiiiiight, I'mma be in a Google Meeeeeeeeet so I don't OD