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freshmen year i was a hot mess, but at least i dressed cool. lol.

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freshmen year i was a hot mess, but at least i dressed cool. lol.

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sophmore year, with my old group of friends. my birthday.

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sophmore year, with my old group of friends. my birthday.

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this song is something i can never get over. i love it so much.  she seriously is someone who inspires me

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this song is something i can never get over. i love it so much.  she seriously is someone who inspires me

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Jonestown:  Life and Death of Peoples Temple (Documentary)

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watched this last year, one of my favorite movies 

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watched this last year, one of my favorite movies 

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i was always on some crazy shit, i was cute.

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i was always on some crazy shit, i was cute.

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hes so great, i love this dude gahhahahah (insert heart emoji

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ricardo has been there for me since 2015, here is our very first conversation back in 2015, lol 

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ricardo has been there for me since 2015, here is our very first conversation back in 2015, lol 

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1. shane dawson
2. david dobrik
3. ACE family
4. jenna marbles
5. Trisha Paytas
6. garrett watts
7. daisy marquez
8. h3h3 productions
9. tammy hembrow
10. drew monson

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one of my favorite shows,  i always use to watch this when i was little

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one of my favorite shows,  i always use to watch this when i was little

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something i try to remember from time to time.

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something i try to remember from time to time.

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junior year was pretty weird, i learned a lot about myself and grew up. a little, heh.

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junior year was pretty weird, i learned a lot about myself and grew up. a little, heh.

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"if they took back the pain they caused, you'd lose the strength you gained."

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"if they took back the pain they caused, you'd lose the strength you gained."

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When I was little I use to have this picture of my mom & my dad when my mom pregnant and me in her belly. Before they divorced obviously they were together, but when they did separate I was fairly young and I would sleep with their picture by my side at night. My sister would tell me I would cry next to the framed photo and carry it around with me everywhere. It has a lot of meaning to me because it’s the only photo I have of my parents next to each other. I believe my sister gave me this photo and I just kept it ever since. It’s somewhere in my room, and when I look it at it reminds me of me when I was little and how much that meant to me. I love printing photos and having a collection of them everywhere. It’s way better than just actually having photos on your phone. I print the ones that have the most meaning to me and ones that were fun and I love to think about.

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Girl or boy, whatever you may be. I just want to let you know that high school is going to be a damn ride, I met a lot of people I’ll never forget, and I met people I haven’t forgotten quick enough. All you need to know is it goes by before you know it. And just embrace it. Be a kid, go out, have fun, actually study and do your homework but let it be just about that. Because when you’re a teen you’re just suppose to have fun with friends who you’ll probably never talk to after you graduate but will always have memories shared with them. Always be yourself and never change for anyone else. Keep to yourself and if girls are about drama then just be your own damn friend because if not your high school career is gonna suck. Also if you do drugs, let me know what you’re doing and if it’s smoking weed fine but none of that hard shit. I’ll home school you. Also just, embrace it. Learn it. And don’t give teachers a hard time. I always hated those students.

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I hope I’m happy. My entire high school career it felt like I was waiting for something, but like I wasn’t really sure as to what it was. I hope I become successful and happy. I know struggle is coming for me, but I try to remember it builds character and it helps you grow as a person. I also never want to see these people ever again. It’s not that I hate them, but the environment is so toxic and it’s always people worrying about the future which is something I already worry about as it is. I use to be such a pessimist and had the worst mentality thinking negative all the time . However coming here, being surrounded by people who care WAY too much has allowed me to become a positive person and not want to head down the path of worry every single day.