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One thing this essay did well was make their point clear on what side they were on. But one thing the writer could've done better would be to better explain the reason why they picked that side in better detail. I give this essay a 2

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They indented which pretty helpful but their essay wasn’t good enough. They could’ve made a better body and thesis statement because it didn’t help their point and they were just going on with the same thing. I give them a 1

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One thing it did well was that the person chose a side and stuck to it.
One thing it could do better is that the person can be less repetitive.
The score I would give it would be a two.

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It had a good thesis,but it should’ve added more details . The score I would give it is a 2

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One thing it did well
It gave clear examples and tried to explain credible information.
One thing it could do better
Add another paragraph and put some more effort into the details.
What score I think it recieved
2.

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The essay had a good thesis. The essay wasn’t very good because it seemed like it just kept repeating itself saying the same example in both paragraphs and the example that was in the intro. They could use different examples and use more of the paper up. I think this essay deserves a 1

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One thing they did not do well was they didn’t have four body paragraphs and didn’t fill the whole paper. One thing they did do well was they did give a lot of detail on the first example paragraph. I would say it is a 2.

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They indented,
They could of added more information.
2

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What the person could've done better with the essay is not leave a lot of extra space towards the end of the essay. The body paragraph could've used way more details. There were really no details in the body paragraph. What it did well was the introduction it had a thesis statement, and it also had a because. The person also didn't have a second body paragraph . Score: 1

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The one thing it did well was a straight-to-the-point thesis, and it even hooked me in a little. The one thing that they did badly was the body of the essay; the first paragraph didn't give a "so what"; and it didn't even have a second paragraph, giving the essay a whole set back. I would totally and truthfully give this essay a two for its absence of the second paragraph and no "so what".

Essay score - 2

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I think their explaination of how knowledge could be used was great, i just wish they used more paragraphs and details.
I think this essay got a 2

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Good - It stated it’s position and did not stray from his initial thoughts throughout the essay
Could Do Better - I’m not sure if I didn’t pay attention but I’m pretty sure they only had 1 example which means they could’ve added another one to make it an overall stronger piece, and they tended to repeat themselves throughout the essay which could be improved.
SCORE - 2/3

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Marlon Gonzalez

It kinda explained the prompt good but the essay what too short and could’ve extended the essay a little more. I think it got a 2.

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They did well on the thesis. They could have done a better job with the handwriting. I think it got a 2

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Coming up with negative outcomes for learning can be pretty hard, so the writer of the essay did pretty well on that note.
But what they could have done better was give different examples, and detail them in a way which would persuade the reader to agree with what the writer is telling us. Overall score I’d give this essay would be a 2, because this person could’ve definitely done so much better.

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It described about hot wiring cars and the information was decent
2

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1.gave some detail
2.could give better details or example
3) 2

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The paragraphs structures had a complete ideaa an share an exact point of view of one side. But the examples and conceptualization didn't give that enough details. Making her argument weak and idea.  Also the lack of information made the conclusion even smaller.

Score: 2

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Johana meza
He did good the entry. And he should fill the whole page

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1.was clear and easy to understand
2. us more space
3.

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They didnt have a good conclusion and didnt go into so what for the help examples
2

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His thesis was good but he could've actually stated his position, and he could've filled the whole page.
He indented
I would give this a

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One thing the essay did good was provide two good examples and details on how learning isn’t always positive in outcome.

The essay could provide a better conclusion and “so what?”. They could’ve used more lines.

This essay probably received a 2.

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They gave good details that gave a good example to why learning isn’t always good
They could have added one more paragraph, no one ever complains about not having to much
I would give this a 3

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where's the conclusion it could've had a better so what it didn't have a call to action  i like the details about criminals and stuff  but it was boring and i wasn't hooked to the essay.....it provided a lot of examples