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Hi Madi! I really liked your transition words sprinkled throughout your story. For example, you used words like “Undoubtedly” and “Additionally.” I also liked your evidence because it was well thought of and detailed. Something you could work on is maybe not using the same sum it up and claim sentence because I noticed you did, and then just added one more sentence to it.

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hola madi, i like your evidence connected to your theme it makes your writing amazing.  I like your explanation it explains your evidences great. I also like your transition word through out the writing.  I see that you have the word but as a transition word. I’m think but us not a transition word.

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Hi Madi! Something I enjoyed from your paragraph was that the explanations were the perfect size and you added in all of the details we needed. To add on, i also liked how you chose unique words for your claim and sum up. My wish is, i feel like in your explanation the sentences were too long. Not all of them but some were long.

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Hi madi ⭐️ Think your go to the heart is really good it is show is some thing that can happen if you don’t like school uniforms and if someone was reading this i think they would agree with you. ⭐️ I think your antidote are really amazing they show what can happen in a really good way. 🧞‍♂️It look like you have your this mean in the end of the evidences the evidence is showing the reason and the this mean show what it mean in your words.

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Hi Madi! A strength in your essay, “Is Uniforms Really The Best Option?” is the way you really describe what the girl looks like in her skirt and how you said, “like beats about to attack.” You really did an amazing job with describing what everyone looks like. Another strength in your essay was how you stated all of your reasons and why school uniforms should not be in place. You showed us how they can affect a child's life by bullying or feeling uncomfortable. One thing I think you can work on is working on putting different questions in your essay. You did, “Has this ever happened to someone before? Or “Would teachers report a problem like this if they saw it happen? I think adding different questions would make your piece stronger and even better. Overall, you did a great job!

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⭐️: I really like how you have her waking up and finding out she was dreaming. ⭐️: like the nice meaning. 🧞‍♂️: when you put the meaning maybe you can do some different ways of saying it

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I really liked your story and how you explained everything in a lot of details, that really helps the reader understand what everything looks like. I also liked that you showed that sally was curious to see what's was in that room. I dont have any wishes because your story was amazing!

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One strength in your memoir “It was all a dream” was how you built suspense. I loved how you added that Aunt Sarah had a room Sally was forbidden to go in. It really made the reader wonder what was in that room. Another strength in your story was how  you had a lot of inner thoughts for Sally because it really showed the reader what she was thinking and helped them connect with her.  One more strength in your story because I couldn’t find anything I wanted you to change. Another one is how much detail and description you had. You did a great job showing not telling!

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⭐️: I really like how you have her waking up and finding out she was dreaming. ⭐️: like the nice meaning. 🧞‍♂️: when you put the meaning maybe you can do some different ways of saying it

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I liked how much you used inner thought. Your story was mostly inner thought and it helped me understand your perspective of the moment and less of everyone else’s. I think that’s a good thing for a memoir to have.I also liked how short the moment you chose was but how much you elaborated on that moment. Most people would think that a moment like that wouldn’t be able to be a memoir, but you found a way to make one. It turned out great.On the other hand you did forget a space after one or two of  your periods so just make sure to quadruple check next time. Overall I loved your story.

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A strength in Madi's memoir was that the ending really hit me like honestly she’s right and it's a little sad that humans changed it but it can’t always stay the same. Another thing I liked was that in the beginning she didn’t tell us where she was right away so it made me want to keep reading to find out. One thing I think you can improve is to add a little more supeance but other than that I think your story was great.

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⭐️: I really like your onomatopoeia and personification. I liked that you had a lot of good inner thought. ⭐️: I like what you described a lot of what you saw.🧞‍♂️:you should describe what people are wearing of what they look like. 

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⭐️: I really like your onomatopoeia and personification. I liked that you had a lot of good inner thought. ⭐️: I like what you described a lot of what you saw.🧞‍♂️:you should describe what people are wearing of what they look like. 

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Your memoir is full of figurative language! But in some spaces, you forgot to type a space after a period.