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10 skills that are hard to learn but will pay off forever.

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10 skills that are hard to learn but will pay off forever.

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10 Skills That Are Hard To Learn But Will Pay Off Forever

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The Importance of Life Skills in Education

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Life skills: definitions, examples & skills to build.

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Life skills: definitions, examples & skills to build.

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What are life skills and how do we build the ones we need for a successful life? Here, we'll talk about the science behind life skills and offer lots of examples of life skills for you to explore.

*This page may include affiliate links; that means we earn from qualifying purchases of products.

Have you ever wondered why some people get ahead and others do not? Have you noticed that the smartest people are rarely the ones in charge? That's because "smarts" are just a small part of what is required to live a happy and successful life. We also need to develop life skills , which include a mixture of psychological and behavioral skills. In this article, we'll talk about what life skills are, provide examples of life skills, and talk about how to build the most important life skills.

​Before getting started, we thought you might be interested in our free well-being quiz. ​

And if you're a well-being entrepreneur, coach, or consultant, check out our free Wellness Business Growth eBook to get expert tips, tools, and resources to grow your wellness business fast.

What Are Life Skills? (A Definition)

Life skills can be defined as abilities that enable humans to deal effectively with the demands and challenges of life. They may also be called psychosocial skills, as they are psychological in nature and include thinking and behavioral processes. Others define life skills as behavioral, cognitive, or interpersonal skills that enable individuals to succeed in various areas of life (Hodge, Danish, & Martin, 2013).

To clarify, life skills are often broken down into three types (​​Prajapati, Sharma, & Sharma, 2017):

Thinking skills : This might involve being able to think of multiple solutions to a problem or develop new innovations in a creative way.

Social skills: This might involve knowing how to develop healthy relationships, how to communicate in effective ways, and how to interact with others successfully.

The Importance of Life Skills

Research suggests that developing life skills may help reduce drug, alcohol, and tobacco use. It may also reduce aggression and violence (Botvin & Griffin, 2004). In addition to these bigger outcomes, life skills can just make life a bit easier. When we can regulate our emotions effectively and develop enduring, supportive relationships, we're happier and healthier. This is why developing life skills is key not only to being successful in life, it's key for our health and well-being.

Examples of Life Skills

According to several key organizations including UNICEF, UNESCO, and WHO, the following are the basic life skills (​​Prajapati, Sharma, & Sharma, 2017):

Of course, these skills overlap, with each of them aiding and supporting the others. There may also be other life skills and there may be subcategories of life skills within each of these basic life skill types.

Basic Life Skills

Let's talk a bit more about the basic life skills mentioned above. What exactly do they involve and how do we build them?

Self-awareness
Self-awareness is conscious attention directed towards the self (​​Wicklund, 1975). To cultivate self-awareness, we may engage in reflection or introspection. When we have this life skill, we often find ourselves pondering why we are the way we are or why we do the things we do.

Critical thinking
Critical thinking can be defined as reflective thinking that focuses on deciding what to believe or do. It may involve organizing facts, analyzing ideas, and evaluating arguments. Overall, having this life skill means we use disciplined thinking to make the best judgments we can and take actions that make the most sense given these judgments (Huitt, 1998).

Creative thinking
Creativity involves the ability to understand a problem and also to redefine it, transform thoughts, reinterpret information, and ignore existing boundaries to find new solutions (​​Kim, 2006). Creative thinking involves fluency, originality, and elaboration. Fluency is the number of relevant ideas that you can come up with. Originally is the number of rare or infrequent ideas you come up with. Elaboration is the number of added ideas you can come up with to build on existing ideas. This life skill may also include 'resistance to closure'-or in other words, keeping an open mind (​​Kim, 2006).

Decision making
Decision making can be defined as identifying and choosing from alternatives. Our decision making process depends on our values, beliefs, goals, etc... This life skill involves tasks such as defining a problem, determining the requirements of an effective solution, establishing the goals of the decision, and identifying alternatives (Fülöp, 2005).

Problem Solving
Problem solving may be defined as a thinking process where we use our knowledge, skills, and understanding to manage an unfamiliar situation. But keep in mind that problem solving is not like an algorithm. A problem simple enough to be solved with a series of "IF-THEN" statements (as is done in an algorithm) has no need for the life skill of problem solving. When it comes to the human mind, it is capable of much more complex problem solving (​​Carson, 2007).

Effective communication
Communication might be defined as the act of disclosing, unmasking, or explaining something in detail (Rowan, 2003). Researchers suggest that we can improve our communication in four ways:

Use common, everyday words

Use "you" and other pronouns

Use the active voice

And use short sentences

This life skill also involves achieving a goal with our communication. For example, we might wish to inform, persuade, or communicate assertively (Rowan, 2003).
Interpersonal relationships
To have successful, healthy relationships, we need a variety of social skills. These life skills might include things like sensitivity to nonverbal cues, low fear of rejection, and the ability to easily adapt when moving from one social situation to the next (Riggio, 1986).

Empathy
Empathy refers to our ability to understand and share the feelings of another. When you are empathetic, you put yourself in another person's shoes, make an effort to see the world from their perspective, and feel the emotions that they feel.

Coping with stress
​Our ability to have resiliency in the face of stress is another key life skill. This might involve developing healthy coping skills, engaging in stress management strategies, and using self-care.

Coping with emotion
Coping with our emotions-for example by tolerating distress and regulating emotions -is another type of life skill. This is especially important for our well-being but skills of this type also have important impacts on our relationships.

Video: 10 Skills That Are Hard To Learn But Will Pay Off Forever

Other Important Life Skills

There are many other important life skills that fall within the larger life skill categories and that are key to well-being. They include the following:

Life Skills for Teenagers

Although all of the life skills we've discussed so far are important for people of all ages, we may have an easier time learning specific life skills (and benefiting from them) at different ages. It all has to do with the kinds of challenges we are facing at different times in our lives. A teenager, for example, is dealing with changing hormones, peer pressure, and identity formation. Here are some life skills that might be good for teenagers to focus on:

Learning how to say "no"

Setting a schedule

Allotting time for adequate sleep

Time management

Learning to communicate with adults

Tolerating rejection

Managing peer pressure

Making their own decisions

Expressing their true feelings

Being authentic

Stress tolerance and reduction

Making new friends

Life Skills for Kids

Unlike adults and teenagers, kids are just beginning to develop social and emotional skills. Therefore, their focus should be on more basic and fundamental processes that aid the development of more complex life skills later on. Here are few life skills that kids need:

Life Skills Activities

It is difficult to build life skills simply by reading about them. Building life skills often involves engaging in activities that require the skill. With time and practice, these activities help you get better at the given life skill. So, here are a handful of activities that can help you build life skills that lead to well-being.

Try loving-kindness meditation. Loving-kindness meditation is a type of meditation that focuses on imagining sending love to the self and others. It can help cultivate life skills like compassion, kindness, love, and other important relationship skills. You can try several Write a gratitude journal. Writing a journal with lists and stories of the things you're grateful for is a great way to build your emotional coping skills. And, gratitude is one of those skills that actually sticks (Davis et al., 2016). Once you've built this skill, your brain can find it easier to be grateful even when you're not trying. Learn more about loving-kindness meditations here.
​ gratitude journaling here.

Use affirmations. Affirmations are when we say a positive statement, usually about ourselves, out loud. This can help us develop more positive feelings about ourselves, boost our confidence, and improve our sense of self-worth. You can learn how to do positive affirmations here.

Video: Teach Life Skills and Change Our World

More Articles Related To Building Life Skills

We've already linked to a ton of other articles on life skills in this article. But here are a few more articles related to building life skills that you might find interesting.

Books on Life Skills

Here are some books to explore if you want to learn more about life skills and how to keep building them.

Final Thoughts on Life Skills

There are so many life skills we could build that improve our lives. It can often be hard to know where to start. Generally, we benefit from building the skills we're worst at-that way, we can see the biggest gains. But, if you're having a hard time getting started, just pick something easy and enjoyable. Then you can move on to more difficult life skills later on.

References

Botvin, G. J., & Griffin, K. W. (2004). Life skills training: Empirical findings and future directions. Journal of primary prevention, 25(2), 211-232.

Carson, J. (2007). A problem with problem solving: Teaching thinking without teaching knowledge. The mathematics educator, 17(2).

Davis, D. E., Choe, E., Meyers, J., Wade, N., Varjas, K., Gifford, A., ... & Worthington Jr, E. L. (2016). Thankful for the little things: A meta-analysis of gratitude interventions . Journal of counseling psychology , 63 (1), 20.

Fülöp, J. (2005, November). Introduction to decision making methods. In BDEI-3 workshop, Washington (pp. 1-15).

Hodge, K., Danish, S., & Martin, J. (2013). Developing a conceptual framework for life skills interventions. The Counseling Psychologist, 41(8), 1125-1152.

Huitt, W. (1998). Critical thinking: An overview. Educational psychology interactive, 3(6), 34-50.

Kim, K. H. (2006). Can we trust creativity tests? A review of the Torrance Tests of Creative Thinking (TTCT). Creativity research journal, 18(1), 3-14.

Prajapati, R., Sharma, B., & Sharma, D. (2017). Significance of life skills education. Contemporary Issues in Education Research (CIER), 10(1), 1-6.

Riggio, R. E. (1986). Assessment of basic social skills. Journal of Personality and social Psychology, 51(3), 649.

Rowan, K. E. (2003). Informing and explaining skills: Theory and research on informative communication. In Handbook of communication and social interaction skills (pp. 421-456). Routledge.

Wicklund, R. A. (1975). Objective self-awareness. In Advances in experimental social psychology (Vol. 8, pp. 233-275). Academic Press.

Key Articles: Content Packages:

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Life Skills: Definition, Examples, & Skills to Build

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What are life skills and how do we build the ones we need for a successful life? Here, we'll talk about the science behind life skills and offer lots of examples of life skills for you to explore. *This page may include affiliate links; that means we earn from qualifying purchases of products.

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After 14 years, we've closed the doors to Living Well Spending Less®. But don't worry, we've curated a collection of our favorite posts that will help you with goals and productivity, healthy living, starting a business and more. Explore our curated collection of handpicked posts below.

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Living Well Spending Less® has closed it's doors, but here is a collection a collection of our favorite posts that will help you with goals and productivity, healthy living, starting a business and more.

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The following section aims to empower and enable children, young people and their families to live their lives as independently and easily as possible by supporting them to develop life skills.

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What are life skills and why teach them?

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What are life skills and why teach them?

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What are life skills and why teach them? | British Council Greece

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Life skills is a term used to describe a set of skills that enable us to effectively handle issues commonly encountered in daily life. They do not develop unaided and have to be learnt.

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Are you preparing your child to be independent? Teaching your child life skills is not only important for self-care and sufficiency - but it also allows him to feel empowered, works on socialization and reasoning, and helps develop healthy self-esteem. While you likely want to keep your kid little forever, helping prepare them to be responsible adults is part of our job as parents.

This list of life skills will help prepare your child for each stage of his life from preschool until the day he flies the coop. You can foster many of these skills at a young age, but adjust expectations as your child grows. The more they get to put skills into practice, the more independent they will become.
More: 8 Life Skills You Can Teach Your Kids At Home During Quarantine
1. Decision-Making Skills

You may not have realized that decision-making skills for young children are something that needs to be learned. Making independent decisions is an important skill to have so that as your child gets older, they can confidently make decisions without relying on someone else.

Allow younger children plenty of opportunities to make decisions like what to wear for the day, what to eat for a snack, etc. Natural consequences, such as choosing a pair of shorts on a winter day, or choosing a fruit snack and feeling hungry again, will help reinforce what are appropriate decisions to make. Kids like feeling in control and having choices offered to them, rather than just being told what to do.

By elementary school, kids will be deciding who to have as friends, what activities to participate in, how to spend their time, etc. Adolescents will be deciding how to spend their money, who to date, what they want to do in the future, etc. This will lead to confidence in young adults deciding about colleges, careers, life partners, etc.

2. Independence

Independence is another skill you may not have realized needs to be taught to kids. As parents, it's easy to complete tasks for our kids because it's faster, less messy, less stressful, etc. But if we want our kids to turn into strong and independent adults, then they need opportunities to develop this skill.

They should know how to complete tasks independently, finish their own school work, tidy their room on their own, and be responsible for their personal belongings. Provide opportunities for independence where your child can be successful and gain confidence in themselves. Typically by the ages of 10-13, your child is ready to stay home alone for small periods of time as they gain independence and you gain confidence that they can be safe on their own.

Your child will need to know how to support herself when she goes away to college or moves out. A great way to practice independence before that milestone is by having him schedule his own doctor and dentist appointments and other important health-related appointments. Before heading to college, make sure your teen can master these six life skills.

3. Basic Hygiene

Teaching kids hygiene skills will vary in level of supervision based on the age of your child, but eventually, you want them to be able to take care of personal hygiene without being told to do so. Basic suggestions for personal hygiene for young children are getting dressed, brushing teeth, washing face, bathing or showering, combing or brushing hair, and independently determining when clothes need to be washed. Pre-teens and teens will have additional personal hygiene skills that should be mastered as they enter puberty, such as learning when to start using deodorant.

4. Cleaning and Household Chores

Getting kids to do chores doesn't have to be a struggle or a punishment. Having kids help out around the house, not only makes mom and dad's lives easier, but can also be a fun and rewarding activity for kids. To start asking your kids to do chores without a fight, make sure you choose tasks that are appropriate for their age, and encourage them when they do a good job. Some parents may want to give their kids an allowance for completing chores, but money doesn't have to be the only reward.

You can start with really basic chores that not only help you out at home but teach your child what is required to keep a tidy and presentable house. Create a checklist or a chore chart to set expectations based on how you need your child to contribute to the household. Then have your child earn stickers or an extra hour of playtime time based on what tasks they complete.

Some suggestions increasing by age are to help put toys away, put dirty clothes in the hamper, clear plates after a meal, help set the table, dust easy to reach places, feed a pet, wash the dishes, vacuum, make their own bed, sweep, and take out the trash.

As your child gets older, typically in teenage years, you can introduce using the washing machine, safely using household cleaning products, filling the gas tank, mowing the lawn, and helping with household projects. Teaching kids real-life skills will mean that you can confidently send them off knowing they can fend for themselves.

5. Preparing a Meal

Learning to cook for themselves will set children up for success in adulthood. Even if it's something basic, being able to independently prepare a meal is a huge life skill. By ages 6 to 7 kids can start to help with cooking meals, and can learn to mix, stir and cut with a dull knife, make a basic meal, like a sandwich, and help put the groceries away. There are many kid-friendly recipes available to help young children learn basic cooking skills.

As your children become more confident in the kitchen, assist them in learning how to follow a recipe and prepare a simple meal for a family dinner. Teenagers can assist with choosing a meal, preparing a grocery list, and using the oven. Parents of teenagers will love being able to assign one night a month, or week, where kids are on kitchen duty.

6. Basic First Aid

Basic first aid, including knowing how to call 911, is a huge life skill that should be learned. Whether your child gets hurt when you're not around, or they are witnesses to an emergency, having the skills and abilities to handle the situation until help arrives is essential. Before a child is allowed to stay home alone, make sure they know their address and your phone number. Talk about what is in a first aid kit and where they are located in the house. Lessons in basic fire safety to how to clean and bandage are all essential first aid skills kids should know.

Practice role-playing calling 911 and remaining calm until help arrives. Anything you can do to help give your child confidence in stressful situations will prepare them for future success. In order to be confident in allowing kids to look after younger siblings or neighbors, you need to be confident in their ability to handle basic first aid.

7. Problem-Solving and Learning to Adapt

Problem-solving and adaptation are skills that even adults can struggle with. Resilient kids will make resilient adults, and in an ever-changing world that can be essential. Practice problem solving and handling challenges appropriately with everyday situations. Kids may get frustrated at first, so teach them how to handle their emotions, and walk through a challenge step-by-step.

Have patience and stay positive so that you help kids learn to persevere through difficult times. One of the best ways to work on developing resilience and adaptation is by modeling appropriate behavior. When things don't go the way you want them to, remember that your little ones are watching your every move. It can be hard to practice what we preach, but this is the perfect time to do it.

8. How to Appropriately Interact with People

We live in a day and age where being open-minded, accepting, and polite can go a long way. Teach your children how to respectfully address people, use good manners especially (please and thank you), have patience with others, to tip their service providers, stop and hold a door, offer help and assistance when they see someone struggling, and hold themselves accountable. The saying of "treat others how you would want to be treated" is the perfect motto when it comes to appropriately interacting with other kids and all people.

Teaching kids manners will help them impress their teachers and set them up for future success in the workforce. When you teach kids table manners, how to eat with their mouth closed, and share with others, grandma and grandpa will be so impressed with how polite your child is at the holiday dinner table!

9. Managing Money and Financial Literacy

You can begin financial awareness at an early age and expand upon these essential life skills as your child gets older. Learning the value of a dollar, spending versus savings, how to identify bills and coins, and how to earn money are all useful skills. Before your child heads off to college they should have a basic understanding of finances, and be able to manage his bank account, pay a bill and use a credit card. While many people and families find the topic of money taboo, the more open and honest you are with your child, the more responsible they will become.

10. Self-Defense Skills

A skill you don't want your child to have to use, but self-defense is extremely important for youngsters to have a basic understanding of. Self-defense classes for kids have become more popular as parents worry about protecting their kids from being abducted or kidnapped. Basic self-defense tactics, including learning how to verbally de-escalate a situation, are also useful for kids to defend themselves against bullies and feel more secure.

Whether you worry about your child being approached by a stranger when walking home from school or a teenager with a job that keeps them out after dark, having self-defense skills will put your mind at ease and give your kid the confidence they need to stay safe.

11. Time Management Skills

Time management is a skill that is always going to be important, so getting started early is key. Kids these days are busy, from school, homework, athletics, extracurriculars, family time, and wanting to be with friends, they are pulled in a ton of different directions. And that doesn't change as they get older, we as parents know how much we have to juggle. Work on creating reasonable routines, block schedules, priorities, and time limits. Once your child gets the hang of things, give them the freedom to manage their time while you intervene when necessary.

We've broken down what your children should be able to do. Now, how do you get them there? Check out our five tips to make your child self-sufficient.

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A parent's guide to the most important life skills for kids by age, from pre-schoolers to teens.