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What are Gross Motor and Fine Motor Skills?

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What are Gross Motor and Fine Motor Skills?

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Paediatric Acute-onset Neuropsychiatric Syndrome.

Paediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorders Associated with Streptococcal Infections

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Researcher interview - Dr Cheryl McQuire discusses Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder

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Researcher interview - Dr Cheryl McQuire discusses Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder

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Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder

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Enlist your child's help in setting up an obstacle course in the garden. Get creative with what you have available to make it fun and challenging. Use garden stones or an old 2x4 to create a balance beam, mark a pathway for them to run or ride their bike on, set up a big bucket for them to throw a ball in.

If you don't have an outdoor space, you can still turn a playroom, garage, front room, or even your kid's bedroom into an obstacle course. Set up different stations like pillows for them to jump over, a row of chairs for them to crawl under, or a line made from painter's tape on the floor for them to walk or run on while balancing a cuddly toy on their head!

We're Going on a Bear Hunt | A Cosmic Kids Yoga Adventure!

Yoga, mindfulness and relaxation designed specially for kids aged 3+, used in schools and homes all over the world.

A Cosmic Kids yoga adventure for younger kids based on the lovely story by Michael Rosen, We're Going on a Bear Hunt. Join Jaime as we try to catch a big one. We can't go over it...we can't go under it!

TROLLS kids dance class with Oti Mabuse

Now, I am a Strictly Come Dancing super fan and have heard that we have some budding dancers in Year 2! Why not have a go at learning this Trolls inspired dance with Oti Mabuse - a challenge for the whole family.

Here's where the paper chains come in from the fine motor skills activity. Leaving just small gaps for the kids to climb through, see if they can make it through the course without tearing the paper!

Alternatively, you could use long strips of paper or string.

Animal Walks

Here are a few animal positions you could have a go at. I'd love to see some photos of you trying them (or even some brothers, sisters or grown ups)!

Can you think of your own animal walks?

Frog Jump -

Caterpillar Crawl

Start in the Bear Walk position

Walk hands out to plank

Walk feet back in to Bear Walk position

Kangaroo Jump

Feet together

Hands to chest

Small jumps with both feet, keeping hands and arms still

Superhero Dance

Get your hearts pumping and learn all the actions!

Kids Superhero Song - Let's Be Superheroes | Action Songs for Kids - Bounce Patrol

Let's be superheroes and save the day! Learn all the hero dance moves - fly like Superman, stomp like the Hulk, run like the Flash, climb like Spider Man, la...

This was a classic play ground game which isn't as often played anymore, which is a real shame as it teaches children co-ordination and timing. You can play this with your child using two skipping ropes tied together if one isn't long enough. You can even play it with only two people if needed as each turner can take it in turns to jump in and out while still holding the rope. I have included a link with lots of different ideas but I didn't spot the one I remember particularly from my childhood so I wil include it here are it has lots more actions for you to do while jumping which makes it more difficult. Mrs Burton used to be able to complete this rhyme, can you? Happy jumping.

Oliver, Oliver, Oliver Twist,

I bet you five thousand,

You can't do this!

Number 1, suck your thumb,

Number 2, touch your bum,

number 3, touch your knee,

Number 4, touch the floor,

Number 5, do the jive,

Number 6, pick up sticks,

Number 7, look to heaven,

Number 8, you're doing great,

Number 9, you're doing fine,

Number 10 Start again.

Did you enjoy the staff's version. Here is a video which will teach you a basic dance which goes with the video. Looking forward to seeing videos of this!

Kids Learn a Dance to "Can't Stop the Feeling" by Justin Timberlake!

Dance along with Dance It Out® Master Trainer, Rae as she takes you through some fun choreography to Justin Timberlake's "Can't Stop the Feeling"! Rae will t...

A simple home made projectile can lead to so much play opportunities for developing handeye coordination skills (little tip- put some blutac or playdogh in the nose to get it to throw straighter).

I have shown one way of making the target but you could incorperate measuring by marking out metres and seeing how far you can throw the paper plane or try to get the paper plane into a hoop/ box or marked out bullseye.

This game can be played with 2 or more people and relies on hand eye co-ordination and balance.

Take it in turns to throw the ball to each other until the ball is dropped. Each time the ball is dropped the person who has dropped it is handicapped. You can either play the game as the person is permanently handicapped and can only lose more limbs, or you can play it that for each sucessful catch after a drop they gain back a limb.

1. One arm behind back

2. One arm behind back, stood on one leg.

3. One arm behind back, on your knees (both legs lost), limited mobility.

4. One arm behind back, on your bottom, no mobility.

5. You have lost the game.

This is a good way of introducing a competative element to the game and children love seeing their parents trying to catch a ball standing on one leg!

Giant Naughts and Crosses.

This is a really flexible game, all you need to do is mark out the grid indoors or out using masking tape, electrical tape or anything else that comes to hand. In one attempt my husband came up with the idea of rolled up tea towels (this is actually better depending on what you are using for your naughts and crosses as prevents rolling). Then get creative with what you would like to substitute for your naughts and crosses. We found pennies or counters from a connect four worked well. Outside balls work well (tea towel grid comes into it's own here) we also found balled up socks worked well indoors as soft...

Once you have the game set up then its like a normal game of naughts and crosses, apart from the fact that you have to stand away from the grid and rely on your coordination to get your item into the intended square on the grid. Fun and competative for all ages!

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Supporting Parent Carers’ Emotional Wellbeing

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Supporting Parent Carers’ Emotional Wellbeing

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Child Grows Up Blind -- The Planson Family -- Our Special Life -- Episode 2

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I have Tourette’s but Tourette’s doesn’t have me.

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I have Tourette’s but Tourette’s doesn’t have me.

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Fine motor skills involve the use of the smaller muscle of the hands, like using pencils, scissors, construction with lego, doing up buttons and opening lunch boxes.

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Fine motor skills involve the use of the smaller muscle of the hands, like using pencils, scissors, construction with lego, doing up buttons and opening lunch boxes.

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The ways that your child will cope with their deafness will vary greatly. An older child or teenager may take a long time to accept their deafness, whereas a younger child will probably take it all in their stride.

If you have a good understanding of your child's deafness, it will help you when you're explaining it to them.

Although many children will develop a positive attitude towards their deafness, your child might be feeling frightened, angry, confused or depressed at first, so it's important that you give them time to understand how their deafness will affect their life, and to talk about how they're feeling.

They may need some additional emotional support to come to terms with their hearing loss - speak to your GP about any concerns you have about your child's wellbeing.

If your child has become deaf quite suddenly, you may find that their behaviour has changed. Their attention span may be shorter, or they may have temper tantrums or become clingy.

For some, this may be as a result of frustration caused by difficulties communicating, or for others, be related to having been through a serious illness. If your child has had a hearing loss for a while but it's only just been diagnosed, they might have been showing these behaviours for a long time.

Other children in the family may also become unsettled if your child is getting a lot of the family's time and attention so ensure you explore with them what they're feeling too.

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My child has a hearing loss | Newly diagnosed deaf child information

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We can offer you deafness resources, support, tips and a sense of community if your child has been diagnosed as deaf - you're not alone, we are here for you

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Sensory exercises for students with ASD/ADHD

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Sensory exercises for students with ASD/ADHD

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Starting the Day for Kids with Autism: SENSORY CIRCUITS 1

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From the National Autistic Society

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A general introduction to what is meant by SLCN. Types of SLCN need are shown in their own section.

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A general introduction to what is meant by SEMH. Types of SEMH need are shown in their own section.

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What is Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) and Tips for Managing it Oppositional Defiant Disorder in Kids

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What is ODD and how can I manage my child's behavior?

Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) is a behavioral disorder in children characterized by a clinically significant level of negative, disobedient, and defiant behavior. For a child to be diagnosed with Oppositional Defiant Disorder, symptoms must be present for more than six months. Behavior must be markedly different than typical children of the same age and developmental level and must not be better explained by another disorder or event.

A child with significant behavioral issues may exhibit signs of anxiety, have frequent and severe tantrums, be manipulative, and/or be repetitively defiant towards those in authority. Often these children are labeled by teachers, peers, and parents as disruptive, frustrating, mean, or even "bad."

If your child exhibits behaviors associated with Oppositional Defiant Disorder, manage his or her behavior with the following strategies:
1. Use a calm voice when dealing with ODD in kids.
A child with Oppositional Defiant Disorder is often hoping to engage his or her parents in a battle of wills. Explain in as few words as possible your position or parental requirement then do not continue to discuss the issue. It is difficult for kids to argue when they have no one to argue with them! If you engage in a back-and-forth argument with a defiant child, you have given the child the power to control the exchange. Remember, the house rules apply to everyone in your home. If you break one of the house rules, give yourself a consequence like apologizing or taking a short time-out to gather your thoughts. Since kids with ODD often see themselves as victims, lead by example to show your child that you aren't too proud to apologize and that the house rules apply to everyone in the family.
2. Celebrate your child's successes.
Kids with ODD have trouble regulating their emotions, which can lead to the severe outbursts and tantrums associated with the disorder. If your child is able to successfully manage his or her behavior for a a longer than usual period of time, celebrate those successes with a family dinner at a favorite restaurant or some other fun family activity. Let your child know you notice and appreciate the extra effort. Make time to have fun and connect with your child when he or she is calm and functioning well.
3. Create a structured environment.
It's no secret that when children are well-rested, physically fit, and get sufficient nutrition, they are better able to regulate their emotions. Make exercise, healthy meals, and adequate sleep a priority. A structured, healthy lifestyle will not only benefit a child with Oppositional Defiant Disorder but your entire family!

4. Set a few non-negotiable house rules and enforce them with consequences.

Kids with ODD are often anxious and have an overwhelming need to control their environment and others. Keep house rules simple and limited so kids don't feel stifled or overwhelmed. For instance, rules may include, "We don't hurt ourselves, others, or property. We use kind language and don't raise our voices." Display house rules and decide ahead of time on consequences for breaking a rule so kids know what to expect if they do. Once your child has completed the consequence, move on from the incident. Show your child that each new day is a chance to make better choices.
How Brain Balance Can Help Children with ODD
If your child exhibits oppositional defiance or is unable to regulate his or her emotions in an age-appropriate way, we invite you to consider the Brain Balance Program.

Is your child disruptive or do they struggle with behavioral issues that inhibit his or her daily functioning? Start with our preliminary online assessment quiz.
Disclaimer: The information presented on this web site is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. All information is intended for your general knowledge only and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment of specific medical conditions. Discuss this information with your healthcare provider to determine what is right for you and your family.

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# Tips For Managing Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)

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Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) is a severe and consistent behavioral disorder in children. Use these four strategies to better manage your child's behavior

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The Window of Tolerance Animation by Beacon House

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The effect of trauma on a child’s brain 

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The effect of trauma on a child’s brain 

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The Window of Tolerance Animation by Beacon House

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Living with FASD from the perspective of two young people.

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Living with FASD from the perspective of two young people.

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Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder: Daniel and Jakob

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There are certain learning and thinking differences that can affect motor skills. These include dyspraxia, visual processing issues, and sensory processing issues. Tweens and teens with these issues may still need to work on strengthening their motor skills.

Here are 14 fun activities suited for older kids to help them build gross and fine motor skills without making it seem like more work.

Activities to improve gross motor skills

1. Trampolines: Jumping on a trampoline is a great activity to improve balance. It can also be part of a sensory diet for sensory seekers. Going to an indoor trampoline park can turn practice into a social event with friends. You can also buy a mini-trampoline to use at home. (If you do, it's important to follow safety rules, such as having a jump bar.)

2. Bowling: Aiming for targets and rolling a bowling ball is another way to work on gross motor skills. If you don't have a bowling alley nearby, you can always set up water-bottle bowling at home, using empty plastic water bottles and a soccer ball.

4. Swimming: Swimming is a whole-body activity in which your child's body has to work against the resistance of the water. It not only builds gross motor skills, it also helps with proprioceptive awareness (knowing where your body is in space).

Activities to improve fine motor skills

9. Building: Put kids to work if they like to work with their hands. Let them help with home repairs. Working with tools like a hammer and a screwdriver allows kids to make use of the small muscles in their hands. It also improves hand-eye coordination. Completing projects successfully can help boost self-esteem.

11. Playing a musical instrument: Playing an instrument can help build fine motor skills, especially piano, woodwind instruments and guitar. Even if kids had trouble playing an instrument when they were younger, it's worth trying again if they express an interest. If you can't afford private lessons, talk to your child's school about band or orchestra as an elective or extracurricular activity. (See a list of instruments and the motor skills they require.)

About the author

About the author

Amanda Morin is the author of "The Everything Parent's Guide to Special Education" and the former director of thought leadership at Understood. As an expert and writer, she helped build Understood from its earliest days.

Reviewed by

Reviewed by

Keri Wilmot is an occupational therapist who works with children of varying ages and abilities in all areas of pediatrics.

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Many activities to build motor skills are geared toward younger kids. But older kids may need help with motor skills development, too. Try these 14 activities.

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OCD is a persuasive disorder, and I know many people joke they have OCD because they are very tidy or worry a lot. Many people worry, and some worry a lot. That does not necessarily mean you or your child have OCD. Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder is a severe anxiety-related condition where individuals suffer frequent obsessive and intrusive thoughts, often followed by uncontrollable urges and compulsions.

Here are some examples of obsessions:

Worrying that they or other members of the family or friends are contaminated

Worrying something terrible will happen to family members

Feeling that you or others may become ill.

Suffering from violent and sexual images

Need everything neat.

Suffering from these thoughts can make your child feel unsafe, sad, and unhappy. Your child may then think they need to do certain things to help them feel safe, and these are called "compulsions". We often call them safety behaviours.
Examples of OCD Compulsions:

Washing your hands lots of times or in a certain way

Counting or saying things in your head, often this can be a specific number; a child I worked with had to do everything in three's

Asking the same question repeatedly

Avoiding specific numbers when counting

Tidying your room lots of times, even though it already looks nice and tidy

Checking lights switch lots of times

Checking the door is locked

The compulsion often seems illogical, and the sufferer knows this, so it's important to recognise this. Suffering from OCD does not mean your child is being naughty or cannot receive help.

How can OCD make you and your child feel?

Children feel out of control, and it's often the boss of their lives. For parents, this can be hard, too, as the parent can become involved in the OCD. Remember, your child will only be diagnosed with OCD if they suffer from each symptom, thoughts, and compulsion.

The Royal College of Psychiatry reports that OCD can affect people of all ages, regardless of class, religion, or gender. It usually starts in childhood. It is thought that 1-2% of the population has OCD. This means at least 130 000 young people suffer from OCD.

What causes OCD?

We do not know the cause of OCD for sure. Research suggests it may be due to an imbalance in a brain chemical called 'serotonin'. It may also run in families and people with tics (jerky movements) in the family. Sometimes, OCD can start after an illness. It can also occur after a difficult time in their life, like an accident.

When do I need to worry? Red flag!

Many children have mild obsessions that do not interfere with their everyday life or level of distress. Seek help if you respond yes to the following questions.

Do the compulsions upset and distress your child?

Do they interfere with the child's everyday life (e.g. school, friends, etc.)?

Have they been present for over six months?

If this is the case, seek help via your GP or contact me for a consultation.

Here is a list of great resources at the Royal College of Psychiatry and

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Does my Child have OCD? - Bristol Child Parent Support

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OCD is a persuasive disorder, and I know many people joke they have OCD because they are very tidy or worry a lot. Many people worry, and some worry a [...]

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Based on what parents would like to know, this section includes practical advice, ideas and contacts for parents and families of children with vision impairment.

Your child and vision impairment - first steps

We know it is a worrying time - there's no "normal" response to finding out your child has a sight condition - people respond in different ways. Here you will find important contacts and information to guide and support you with those  first steps.

Our information and advice for parents is also available in a downloadable booklet for those who prefer offline or hard copy material:

Starting Point

Starting Point is a leaflet for parents of babies and children who are newly diagnosed with an eye condition. It has been produced by a collaboration of support charities and introduces  Sight Advice FAQ  which you can use to ask questions about your child's diagnosis and the support and services available to you. Starting Point is given to families in eye clinics.

If you are a professional who would like to distribute the Starting Point leaflet to families you support please contact Guide Dogs at [email protected]  to order copies.

Encouraging independence

There are many ways you can  encourage independence, and help your child to move around more confidently, begin to look after their own needs and feel more confident at mealtimes. Your child may need to be taught skills that others do by imitation, and we tell you about the people who can help with this.

Learning and school

Children with vision impairment are entitled to support for their learning from birth onwards by a specialist teacher called a QTVI. If your child has complex needs, they will usually be supported in a special school in your local authority - find out more on  education and learning.

Financial support

Find out about  financial support, grants and allowances  for families of children with a vision impairment.

Into Adulthood

We have advice and guidance for young people as they make the transition from school into further or higher education, employment and adult support services. See our  Transitions section for more details.

We're here for you

If you have a question about living with sight loss we're here to offer support.

Call 0303 123 9999

"Alexa, call RNIB Helpline" on Alexa-enabled devices

Living with sight loss

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Information for parents of children with vision impairment

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Based on what parents would like to know, this section includes practical advice, ideas and contacts for parents and families of children with vision impairment. Your child and vision impairment - first steps We know it is a worrying time - there's no "normal" response to finding out your child has a sight condition - people respond in different ways.

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Dyslexia | How Do Dyslexics Learn? | Think How You Learn

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Emotional health and wellbeing for families of deaf children

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We believe the most important influence on a deaf child's life is their family, so the emotional health and wellbeing of everyone in the family is crucial

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How to make a Sensory Bottle | Easy + Quick | DIY

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A child-friendly explanation.

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Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)

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Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a condition that affects people's behaviour. People with ADHD can seem restless, may have trouble concentrating and may act on impulse.

Symptoms of ADHD tend to be noticed at an early age and may become more noticeable when a child's circumstances change, such as when they start school.

Most cases are diagnosed when children are under 12 years old, but sometimes it's diagnosed later in childhood.

Sometimes ADHD was not recognised when someone was a child, and they are diagnosed later as an adult.

The symptoms of ADHD may improve with age, but many adults who were diagnosed with the condition at a young age continue to experience problems.

People with ADHD may also have additional problems, such as sleep and anxiety disorders.

Getting help

Many children go through phases where they're restless or inattentive. This is often completely normal and does not necessarily mean they have ADHD.

But you should discuss your concerns with your child's teacher, their school's special educational needs co-ordinator (SENCO) or a GP if you think their behaviour may be different from most children their age.

It's also a good idea to speak to a GP if you're an adult and think you may have ADHD, but were not diagnosed with the condition as a child.

What causes attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)?

The exact cause of ADHD is unknown, but the condition has been shown to run in families.

Research has also identified a number of possible differences in the brains of people with ADHD when compared with those without the condition.

Other factors suggested as potentially having a role in ADHD include:

being born prematurely (before the 37th week of pregnancy)

having a low birthweight

smoking or alcohol or drug abuse during pregnancy

ADHD can occur in people of any intellectual ability, although it's more common in people with learning difficulties.

How attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is treated

For children with ADHD, although there's no cure, it can be managed with appropriate educational support, advice and support for parents and affected children, alongside medicine, if necessary.

For adults with ADHD, medicine is often the first treatment offered, although psychological therapies such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) may also help.

Living with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)

Parents of children with ADHD

Looking after a child with ADHD can be challenging, but it's important to remember that they cannot help their behaviour.

Some day-to-day activities might be more difficult for you and your child, including:

getting your child to sleep at night

getting ready for school on time

listening to and carrying out instructions

being organised

social occasions

shopping

Adults with ADHD

Adults with ADHD may find they have problems with:

organisation and time management

following instructions

focusing and completing tasks

coping with stress

feeling restless or impatient

impulsiveness and risk taking

Some adults may also have issues with relationships or social interaction.

Page last reviewed: 24 December 2021
Next review due: 24 December 2024

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Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)

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Read about attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), a condition that affects people's behaviour.

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Introduction to Social, Emotional and Mental Health Needs

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What is Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA)?

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Version en Español
Raising a child with oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) can be extremely frustrating because you feel like everything is a constant battle. You just want your child to do their homework, pick up their toys, get dressed for school, etc. and you are constantly faced with refusal.

As a behavior specialist and school psychologist, I have had many parents and teachers ask for behavior strategies to help a child with oppositional defiant disorder or behavioral challenges.
Recommended Book: The Explosive Child: New Approach For Understanding And Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children
In my training, I learned a lot about positive behavior support strategies and have used them with my clients and students for the past 21 years, and now with my own children (ages 7 and 3).

I can tell you firsthand that these strategies are extremely effective. They work when I use them and when I teach others how to use them with their children or students.

People often think that positive behavior support is simply giving rewards for good behavior, and when that doesn't work they think that the system doesn't work.

While a piece of positive behavior support is allowing children to earn privileges rather than taking them away, it is so much more than just that. It is a scientific way of speaking, acting, and responding to behavior.

Related Article: How to Use Natural and Logical Consequences to Improve Children's Behavior

FYI: These tips are effective for all kids, not just those diagnosed with oppositional defiant disorder.

1. Set up expectations ahead of time.

Your child should know what you expect of them each day. This can be communicated through a checklist, visual schedule, video recording, etc.

Your child will want to do things that are fun and instantly gratifying. Boundaries are important when enforcing expectations. "Yes, you can do that! But you also need to do this."

This is much more effective for encouraging compliance than punishing your child or taking away privileges when they don't do what you want them to do.

Let your child have a say in what they want to work for. Allowing children to earn privileges by following their expectations (e.g., self-care, kindness) puts the ball in their court.

They know what is expected of them and they know what they have to do to earn the things they enjoy. They also feel a sense of pride when they earn what they worked for.

When your child starts getting off track, remind them of what they are working towards rather than telling them what you will take away if they don't listen.

Research shows that children and adolescents are much more likely to do what is expected when they have the power to earn something, than when being threatened that you will take something from them.

Want to read more about this research? Check out the following research studies:

Related Article: Do Rewards Make Sense? What Can Your Children Earn?

2. Use transition warnings to let your child know what is coming next.

Here are examples of transition warnings, "In ten minutes it is time to turn off your video games and come eat dinner" or "After this show, it is time for homework." Give some more reminders as the time is winding down (e.g., in two minutes it's time for dinner).

A timer or visual timer can be helpful for children who don't have a concept of time.

Related Article: 3 Ways to Use Timers to Encourage Homework and Chore Completion

3. Use empathetic statements to show your child you understand how they feel.

Imagine how you would feel if someone came into your room and said "get off the computer and go to bed." Although they are kids and are expected to follow adults' rules, they still have the same feelings you would have in that type of situation.

You can show them you understand how they feel with a statement such as "I know you are really enjoying your computer time and you don't want to turn it off, but you need to get rest for school tomorrow. You can have some time on the computer again tomorrow."
Recommended: Become a Certified Self-Esteem Coach for Children
4. Phrase directives in the positive and remove the word "can."

For example, instead of "stop jumping on the furniture" or "can you stop jumping on the furniture?" try something like "sit down" or "come down off the couch " in a calm, but confident tone.

If possible provide an alternative activity or redirect them to something they like to do like "let's do jumping jacks together" or "here are some puzzles/blocks to play with."

Children respond much better when you tell them "what to do" rather than "what not to do." Anything you want your child to stop, you can phrase in the positive by giving them a clear direction of what you want them to do. Giving an explanation such as "you can fall" or "that can damage the couch" is often helpful as well.

Related Article: 17 Ways to Get Your Kids to Listen to You and Show You Respect

5. Use specific praise when your child follows your expectations or listens to your directions.

Some examples of specific praise include "excellent job picking up your toys," "you were so focused during homework tonight," "nice job listening to directions" etc. Specific praise or acknowledgment of healthy behaviors reminds the child of what behaviors you are looking for and reinforces those behaviors.

6. Pick your battles.

If your five-year-old is playing in the dirt and you find it disgusting, let them. As long as they are safe, not hurting or disrespecting themselves or anyone else, and not damaging anything, try to give them as much freedom as possible.

7. Give your child choices when possible.

Research indicates that providing children with choices leads to improvement in behavior. Examples include, "Do you want to wear the green or red shirt?" "Do you want to do your math or reading homework first?" "Do you want to set the table or take out the garbage?"

8. Say what you mean and mean what you say.

If you tell your child that he needs to pick up his toys before he can play outside, make sure you follow through on your rule and honor your end of the bargain.

Stay away from empty threats (punishments that you will never follow through on). Your child will come to learn the value of your words. If you don't mean what you say, they won't take you seriously. The National Association of Child Development is with us on this one!

And research indicates the need for consistency when implementing positive parenting practices. Consistency includes integrity, honesty, and respect.

You can build in chores, homework (if applicable), self-help tasks (shower, brush teeth, etc,), and fun activities. Have your child participate in creating the schedule. Embed the fun activities into the schedule so that your child alternates between preferred and non-preferred activities. One part of the schedule needs to be complete before moving on to the next part.

Recommended: Study: Daily Routines Impact Childhood Development

Some children benefit from mini-schedules, which is a shortened variation of a typical schedule. Mini-scedules can include as few as two or three steps.

Also, keep in mind that children with idle time on their hands are looking for things to do, so structuring their time can alleviate some impulsive behaviors like running/jumping in the house.

Related Article: How to Use Schedules to Promote Positive Behavior in Children
10. Avoid arguing, long lectures, or sarcastic remarks about your child's behavior.

Stick to your rules and don't negotiate, go back and forth, or argue with your child. However, also consider your own rules and whether they are appropriate for your child. For instance, you wouldn't expect a three-year old to "never jump in the house" because jumping, and movement, in general, are developmentally appropriate for a three-year-old.

Once your rules are in place and your child is aware of them, state them as needed. If your child starts to argue or tantrum after you have stated the rule and given empathy, let them know that you are not going to discuss it anymore. Do not give in to a temper tantrum.

Recommended: How to Handle Temper Tantrums

Once the tantrum is over you can praise your child for calming down, provide empathy again if needed, and listen if your child wants to talk about his/her feelings. Then direct your child back to the task he/she is expected to do.

If your child is acting unsafe, protect him/her and others from harm but do not try to negotiate with your child or give in to the tantrum in order to make it stop. This will only lead to more tantrums in the future. If you are ever concerned for the safety of your child or anyone else, contact the crisis center or emergency number in your area.

While there is no one method that works for every single child, these are the methods that are backed by research, and personal experience has proven just how well they work.

Research suggests that children with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and Oppositional Defiant Disorder who display impulsive behaviors (e.g., acting without thinking), show improvement when positive behavior support strategies such as the ones discussed in this article are used in conjunction with strategies that teach pro-social behaviors (e.g., how to conduct oneself in different situations, how to identify problems and brainstorm solutions, how to recognize which behaviors may be undesirable in certain situations and why).

For more on these research studies see 6 Research-Based Interventions for the Treatment of ADHD in Children and 5 Research-Based Strategies for Treating Youth with Oppositional Defiant Disorder.

For strategies to decrease impulsive behaviors check out 9 Practical Strategies for Decreasing Impulsive Behavior in Children. Impulsive behaviors may include hitting, yelling, blurting something out, taking something without asking, breaking something, etc.

We offer a free five-minute behavior consultation via text for parents, educators, or other interested parties. Please text 484 201 3815 or email rachelwise@educationandbehavior.com for more information.

Video Presentation:

Sometimes toddlers have communication difficulties that interfere with their ability to understand or express themselves. This can lead to behavioral challenges. Toddler Talk: Techniques and Games might be a helpful book for you if you find yourself in this situation with your toddler.

Recommended Articles:

Education and Behavior - A Free Resource for Parents, Educators, Counselors, and Therapists! Keeping Us On the Same Page!

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Try These Top 10 Behavior Strategies for Children with Oppositional Defiant Disorder

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Practical research-based behavior strategies for treatment of a child with oppositional defiant disorder or related symptoms. Shared by a licensed behavior specialist and certified school psychologist.

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Dyslexia Explained | What's It Like Being Dyslexic? | Understand Dyslexia

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Ten things you need to know about Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA)

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Describing some of the main aspects of Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA)

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Information and lists from the British Dyslexia Association

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A checklist cannot tell you if someone is dyslexic. It is a tool used to help understand whether there is a likelihood of dyslexia, and whether further investigation should take place.

Dyslexia can only be diagnosed through a formal Diagnostic Assessment. Find out more on the BDA Assessment webpage.

Adult checklist

The Adult Dyslexia Checklist contains questions that help predict dyslexia. The scores for each answer show the relative importance of that question.

Alongside each line you can keep a tally of your score and at the end find your total.

Checklists for learners

Checklists can't tell you whether a learner is dyslexic. They are useful because they outline your learner's strengths and weaknesses, and can help to inform a supportive teaching strategy.
Understanding Neurodiversity: A Guide to SpLD (2nd edition)
Appropriate support should be put in place as soon as a need is identified. A formal diagnosis is not required for support in the classroom. However, a formal diagnosis would help to give a clearer picture of your learner's areas of strength and weakness.

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Dyslexia checklists - British Dyslexia Association

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A checklist cannot tell you if someone is dyslexic. It is a tool used to help understand whether there is a likelihood of dyslexia, and whether further...

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Activities to Promote Handwriting Skills

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A conversation between parents and daughter

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A conversation between parents and daughter

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Part 1: Teenager Who is Deaf Talks to Mom, Dad About Wanting Her to Hear

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Affiliate and Referral links are used below to promote products I love and recommend. I receive a commission on any purchases made through these links. Please see my disclosure policy for more details.
I want to welcome Sara, an Occupational Therapist to the blog today to share about sensory processing and the teenage years.
Children with sensory processing disorder continue to grow up and age into teenagers and adults. Do you wonder what happens to kids with sensory processing disorder as they age into teenagers? Like we know, all children are different and unique, but some of these children may still have difficulty with sensory processing as they become teenagers.

Sensory Processing and the Teenage Years

Teens are presented with new experiences and expectations. Typically they want to gain more independence and control over their life, they are going through hormonal changes through puberty and they are presented with new social experiences.
How do we support teens with sensory processing difficulties?

As the parent, teacher, or therapist you need to be able to change your mindset for teens. They are no longer your little child that needs all of your help to help them with their sensory challenges. You need to help foster where they are developmentally and help them through these new situations.

Allow them to make their own choices: They are going to want to explore more independence and make their own choices. We can get so used to making sensory choices for our kids (especially if they weren't able to verbally tell us what they needed), but as they get older they may want to be able to make their own choices.

In the moment they may need extra guidance and support from you to help them make that choice. For example, if they are starting to get frustrated and show some signs of anger, having choices laid out for them to help them calm down can be helpful. Present accommodations and activities to teenagers and let them decide which they would like to use. Honor and respect their choices and encourage them to engage in problem-solving with you.

Self-Regulation and Self-Esteem: Learn to respect that teens may be more emotional during this time of life. Learn to recognize signs of anxiety and depression and seek out medical advice from a health professional with any concerns. Try these activities to help with emotions: deep breathing, mindfulness, yoga, spending time outdoors, Tai Kwan Do, and meditation.

The Environment: Teens may start to have a little more control over their environment and let you know what upsets them in their environment. Consider the lighting, sounds, and smells in the environment that the teen is in. Do they let you know that certain sounds are distracting to them? Talk with your teen and listen to them. Together you can problem solve how to best set up their environment to help with attention and focus and help them complete everyday tasks.

Find sensory strategies that are meaningful to teenagers: Teenagers have different views on what they will like compared to when they were younger. Teens may develop different sensory preferences and may need different sensory activities presented to them. The best way to find out how to support your teen's sensory needs is finding an occupational therapist or professionally trained in sensory processing to help your teen with one on one treatment and evaluation.

Movement activity ideas:

Getting involved in group sports activities

Running

Yoga

Pilates

Skateboarding

Skiing

Gymnastics

Going on amusement park rides

Swinging in a hammock

Bike riding on a trail

Calming Activity ideas:

Swinging

Rocking

Yoga

Going for a walk

Chewing gum

Spending time in a quiet, dark space

These are just a few sensory activity ideas for teens to try. Check out these and many more in the ebook Making Sense of the Teen Years: A Sensory Processing Guide.

Teenagers are going through new changes and we need to learn how to best support their sensory needs during this time of life. Check out how to best support them in the ebook Making Sense of the Teen Years: A Sensory Processing Guide.

You can also find these two free guides:

Sara is a sister to a teenage brother who is on the autism spectrum. Her family created the blog called www.learningforapurpose.com to share valuable resources they have learned as a family on their journey to help her brother become an independent adult. She currently works as a pediatric occupational therapist and her mother is a special education teacher who now homeschools her brother. Together they provide professional knowledge and their family's experiences to provide you with resources to help you in your everyday life adventures. You can find Sara and her family's blog at Learning For A Purpose and on Facebook and Pinterest.
You May Also Like:

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Sensory Processing and the Teenage Years

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Sara, an Occupational Therapist, shares tips and strategies for sensory processing and the teenage years. Includes links to resources and toolkits for teens

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Understanding Autism, Asperger’s and ADHD - Free courses - University of Derby

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This free short online course will encourage you to challenge your own definitions and perceptions of autism and ADHD. You will get an opportunity to examine several key themes around both autism and ADHD in order to obtain skills to help people with these conditions.

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Lots of information, videos and guidance from this organisation.

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ADHD Videos - To help explain ADHD better | ADHD UK

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ADHD Videos - To explain ADHD we’ve made a series of videos with different categories for those wanting to understand more and those that aren’t familiar with it

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​​​​​Grandparents, friends, or neighbors who are worried about a child's speech and/or language development may hesitate to bring it up for fear of upsetting or offending a parent. While raising any concern to parents about their child is difficult, it is in a child's best interest to have any speech and/or language issues identified and treated as early as possible.

Below are some do's and don'ts for talking respectfully and productively about a potential communication delay.

DO'S

DO learn developmental milestones. Before sounding the alarm, refer to a list of speech and language milestones by age. Also look at the early signs of speech and language disorders. There may be no reason to worry. Share the milestones and your concerns with parents, especially if a child is not doing what is expected.

DO know that not all children are the same. At 12 months, one child may be saying one word while another may be speaking 10 or more. This variability is typical-not every child has the same communication skills at the same age. The developmental milestones account for an expected range in skills.

If a child is learning more than one language, be sure to count words in both languages. His or her development may be different than children who are only learning one language. Also, note that learning more than one language does not cause or worsen speech or language delays.

DO be sensitive when raising the issue. Try saying,"I saw a story on the news about children's speech and language development...," or phrasing your concern as a question, e.g.,"What do you think of Tommy's speech? Has he been using new words?"

DO share your family history of speech and language disorders, if known. Some disorders have a strong genetic component (a good example is stuttering), so this is important information to share.

DO tell parents to ask for professional assistance. Encourage parents to set up an appointment with their child's doctor to discuss concerns. If concerns are confirmed, the doctor will make a referral for a speech and language evaluation. If the doctor is not concerned but the parents still are, the parents should trust their instincts and get a second opinion or have their child evaluated by a speech-language pathologist. A certified speech-language pathologist may determine there is no need to worry, and then the result is peace of mind. However, if there is a speech and/or language delay, it can be treated in a timely manner.

DO provide resources to find help, if the child's doctor has not made any referrals for a speech and language evaluation.

If the child is less than 3 years old: Parents can access their state's early intervention program. for a free evaluation. See What is Early Intervention?.

If the child is 3 years or older: Parents can contact a local elementary school and ask to speak with someone who can help and have their child evaluated - even if their child does not go to that school. This is a free service provided by local school districts.

For the assistance of a private speech-language pathologist: Search the ASHA ProFind database.

DON'T compare siblings to each other. An older child may have been advanced for his or her age, resulting in concern when the second child is developing in a typical way. Again, look more broadly to expected developmental language milestones.

DON'T place blame. Parents don't cause speech and language disorders. It is inaccurate and hurtful to tell a parent he or she should have done something differently.

DON'T give labels. Do not try to diagnose the child. Instead, describe what you see. Leave a diagnosis to a speech-language pathologist, who is specially educated for identifying communication disorders. Share what the child does well also (e.g.,"I know Sarah uses a few single words, and I was curious when she should starting putting multiple words together.")

DON'T assume treatment is too expensive. Services may be free through the state's early intervention program or school system, offered on a sliding scale, or may be covered in part or full by insurance. There are options for families.

DON'T "wait and see" if the child outgrows the problem. This is probably the most important point. Speech and language delays are highly treatable. The best outcomes occur when a child is seen by a professional early. Ideally, children will be treated long before entering kindergarten-and even before age 3, when children are in their most rapid period of development. Acting early can improve academic and social success, so speak up early.

DO be sensitive to the family's values and norms. Individuals handle concerns about developmental delays differently based on their background, family values, and norms. There may be different approaches to how children are being raised. Be mindful and respectful of those differences as you consider talking with people outside of your family (e.g., neighbor, friend).

DON'TS

Still Have Questions?

Contact the American Speech Hearing Association (ASHA) Consumer Action Center at 800-638-8255 or contact the ASHA National Office.

Additional Information:

Copyright © 2016 American Academy of Pediatrics and American Speech-Language-Hearing Association

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communication delay~ late talking~ slow talking~ speech development~ speech milestones~ not talking yet~ toddler speech~ language delay~ language milestone~ concerned about development~ slp~ asha~ grandparent concerns~ neighnor concerns~ friend concerns

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How to Raise Concerns about a Child's Speech and Language Development: Do's and Don'ts

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​​​Grandparents, friends, or neighbors who are worried about a child's speech and/or language development may hesitate to bring it up for fear of upsetting or offending a parent. Here are some do's and don'ts for talking respectfully and productively about a potential communication delay.

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Introduction to PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance)

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Great resources for families from FASD Network

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Great resources for families from FASD Network

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Developmental co-ordination disorder (DCD) cannot be cured, but there are ways to help your child manage their problems.
A small number of children, usually those with mild symptoms who are diagnosed early, may be able to learn how to overcome their difficulties.

However the vast majority of children need long-term help and will continue to be affected as teenagers and adults.

Once DCD has been diagnosed, a treatment plan tailored to your child's particular difficulties can be made. This plan may involve a variety of specialists.

A treatment plan, combined with extra help at school, can help your child manage many of their physical difficulties, improve their general confidence and self-esteem, and help them to become a well-adjusted adult.

Healthcare professionals

Several healthcare professionals may be involved in your child's care.

For example, your child may need help from a paediatric occupational therapist, who can assess their abilities in daily activities, such as:

using cutlery

dressing

using the toilet

playing

fine movement activities such as writing

A therapist may work with a child, their carers and their teachers to help find ways to manage any problems.

Your child may also receive help from a paediatric physiotherapist. They can assess their abilities and create a therapy plan especially for them, which may include activities to improve walking, running, balance and co-ordination, among others.

Other healthcare professionals involved in your child's care may include:

a paediatrician - a doctor who specialises in the care of babies and children

an educational psychologist - a professional who helps children who are having trouble progressing with their education because of emotional, psychological or behavioural factors

Some of the interventions these health professionals may provide are outlined below.

Activity-oriented approach

One of the main types of intervention used to help children with DCD manage their condition is known as an activity-oriented approach.

This involves working with you and your child to identify specific activities that cause difficulties, and finding ways to overcome them.

For example, a therapist can help improve difficulties with specific movements by breaking the action down into small steps. They then teach your child to plan these individual movements and practice them regularly.

Your child may also benefit from adapting tasks to make them easier to do, such as adding special grips to pens to make them easier to hold, or wearing shoes with Velcro fasteners rather than shoelaces to make dressing easier.

Your child may be encouraged to exercise regularly as well, as this is generally considered to be beneficial for children with DCD.

Body-function-oriented approach

An alternative method to the task-oriented approach is the body-function-oriented approach. This is based on the theory that problems with your child's senses or perception of their body may be contributing to their movement difficulties.

A body-function-oriented approach may involve activities aimed at improving your child's general movement (motor) skills, rather than helping them with a particular task or activity.

However, this isn't thought to be as effective as the activity-oriented approach.

Treating other conditions

Children with DCD often have other conditions as well, which may need to be treated separately.

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)

If your child also has attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), they may benefit from taking medication to help them concentrate better, be less impulsive, feel calmer, and learn and practise new skills.

Find out more about treating ADHD.

Dyslexia

If your child also has dyslexia, they may benefit from special educational interventions designed to improve their reading and writing.

Find out more about treating dyslexia.

Autism

If your child also has autism, they may benefit from special programmes designed to help improve their communication, social interaction, and cognitive and academic skills. This can help children who have autism with everyday life.

Speech and language problems

Speech and language therapy may be useful if your child also has problems with their speech.

A speech and language therapist can assess your child's speech and help them find ways to communicate to the best of their ability.

This may involve exercises to move the lips or tongue in a certain way, practicing producing certain sounds, and learning to control their breathing.

Treatment as your child gets older

Although the physical co-ordination skills of a child with DCD will remain below average, this often becomes less of a problem as they get older.

During adolescence, difficulties in school - particularly producing written work - may become much more prominent.

Further treatment with an occupational therapist for handwriting problems may be helpful when your child is a little older.

Teachers may request older children be allowed more time in exams. Having access to a computer can make homework easier, and some schools will provide a laptop.

A young person may have 1 or more of the additional symptoms associated with DCD which adversely affects their behaviour, socialisation and school achievement.

These young people often require a significant degree of parental support in addition to the treatment they receive.

Alternative therapies

Because of the limitations of available treatments for DCD and the fact it cannot be cured, some parents may look into alternative therapies that claim to cure or greatly improve the condition.

But there's usually no scientific evidence to support the use of alternative therapies, and they can be expensive and time consuming.

It's also important to bear in mind that sometimes the physical co-ordination problems associated with DCD will naturally improve over time.

Support groups

Looking after a child with DCD can be difficult. You may find it helpful to contact local or national support groups, such as the Dyspraxia Foundation.

The Dyspraxia Foundation has information and advice for parents of children with dyspraxia that covers many of the issues that may arise as your child gets older.

Contact the Foundation's helpline on 01462 454 986.

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Developmental co-ordination disorder (dyspraxia) in children - Treatment

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Read about treating developmental co-ordination disorder (DCD). Although it can't be cured, there are ways your child can be helped to manage their problems.

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What is dyslexia? - Kelli Sandman-Hurley

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How Tourette’s Action supports families 

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How Tourette’s Action supports families 

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Why are the signs and symptoms of Dyslexia?

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Why are the signs and symptoms of Dyslexia?

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Dyslexia is a common learning difficulty that mainly causes problems with reading, writing and spelling.
It's a specific learning difficulty, which means it causes problems with certain abilities used for learning, such as reading and writing.

Unlike a learning disability, intelligence isn't affected.

It's estimated up to 1 in every 10 people in the UK has some degree of dyslexia.

Dyslexia is a lifelong problem that can present challenges on a daily basis, but support is available to improve reading and writing skills and help those with the problem be successful at school and work.

What are the signs of dyslexia?

Signs of dyslexia usually become apparent when a child starts school and begins to focus more on learning how to read and write.

A person with dyslexia may:

read and write very slowly

confuse the order of letters in words

be confused by letters that look similar and write letters the wrong way round (such as "b" and "d")

have poor or inconsistent spelling

understand information when told verbally, but have difficulty with information that's written down

find it hard to carry out a sequence of directions

struggle with planning and organisation

But people with dyslexia often have good skills in other areas, such as creative thinking and problem solving.

Read more about the symptoms of dyslexia.

Getting help

If you think your child may have dyslexia, the first step is to speak to their teacher or their school's special educational needs co-ordinator (SENCO) about your concerns.

They may be able to offer additional support to help your child if necessary.

If your child continues to have problems despite extra support, you or the school may want to consider requesting an in-depth assessment from a specialist in assessing specific learning difficulties (SpLD), an educational psychologist or a speech and language therapist.

This can be arranged through the school, or you can request a private assessment by contacting:

Adults who wish to be assessed for dyslexia should contact a local or national dyslexia association for advice.

Read more about how dyslexia is diagnosed.

Support for people with dyslexia

If your child has dyslexia, they'll probably need extra educational support from their school.

With appropriate support, there's usually no reason your child can't go to a mainstream school, although a small number of children may benefit from attending a specialist school.

Techniques and support that may help your child include:

occasional 1-to-1 teaching or lessons in a small group with a specialist teacher

phonics (a way of teaching children to identify and process the smaller sounds that make up words) combined with other techniques

technology like computers and speech-recognition software that may make it easier for your child to read and write when they're a bit older

Schools and colleges must offer support to students with a specific learning difficulty like dyslexia, and have access to specialist staff who are trained in helping students with special education needs.

Assistive technologies such as speech-recognition software, word processors and electronic organisers can be useful for adults, too.

Employers are required to make reasonable adjustments to the workplace to help people with dyslexia, such as allowing extra time for certain tasks.

Read more about how dyslexia is managed.

Support groups

As well as national dyslexia charities such as the British Dyslexia Association (BDA), there are several local dyslexia associations listed on the BDA website.

These are independently registered charities that run workshops and help to provide local support and access to information.

What causes dyslexia?

People with dyslexia find it difficult to recognise the different sounds that make up words and relate these to letters.

Dyslexia isn't related to a person's general level of intelligence. Children and adults of all intellectual abilities can be affected by dyslexia.

The exact cause of dyslexia is unknown, but it often appears to run in families.

It's thought certain genes inherited from your parents may act together in a way that affects how some parts of the brain develop during early life.

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Read about dyslexia, a common type of learning difficulty that can cause problems with reading, writing and spelling.

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Self-Help Resources

A Sensory Diet is a controlled program of interaction with sensory input throughout the day, that help us to be alert and adaptable, so we are able to function to the best of our abilities in our environment.

They may be developed independently or with the help of an occupational therapist, and may be used in conjunction with other programs, as a transition to or from other programs, or as a primary maintenance and accommodation program.

We all have sensory activities we perform to help keep us regulated and focused. You may be able to think of a few already: drinking your morning coffee or going for your evening run. Sensory diets are just another way of structuring many of the things you already do.

Download the 'Developing Your Own Sensory Diet' kit below for worksheets and tips on how to identify your own sensory needs and build your own sensory diet!

Download 'Developing Your Own Sensory Diet' (ZIP)

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Adults and Adolescents Toolkit | SPIRAL Foundation

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A Sensory Diet is a controlled program of interaction with sensory input throughout the day, that help us to be alert and adaptable, so we are able to function to the best of our abilities in our environment.

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We’re here to support autistic people into sustainable and fulfilling employment I am an autistic person Look here for guidance on finding and keeping work, from job search through to retirement. I am an employer or work provider Look here for information on how to recruit, manage and support

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Information for young people about ADHD

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A person with ADHD has differences in brain development and brain activity. Put simply, your brain works differently compared with someone who doesn't have ADHD, so you learn in a different way, and you may sometimes behave differently. You can't change it, but you can learn to manage it, and it can even give you certain advantages!

Growing up isn't easy. You have to take on responsibilities, schoolwork is harder, and you get more homework. On top of this, changes in your body can affect your emotions and your self-confidence.

If you live with ADHD, growing up can be even more of a challenge. You could find you get angry or frustrated, you might react badly or get irritated if things go wrong, and you may find it difficult to be motivated. In fact, most people of your age have similar feelings - but with ADHD, everything can seem more intense and harder to handle.

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What is ADHD? | I am a young person with ADHD

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Your brain works differently compared with someone who doesn't have ADHD, so you learn in a different way, and you may sometimes behave differently.

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My Pathological demand avoidance and autism at age 10 Q&A PDA

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There is also a link to checklists for primary and secondary aged children.

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Perception includes vision, hearing and proprioception, or the awareness of where your limbs are in space. There may be developmental delays in some areas but heightened sensitivities or abilities in others. Dyspraxia exists as a condition on its own but is often found together with hyper mobile joints, Dyslexia, Dyscalculia, ADHD or Asperger's Syndrome. This is why a diagnosis at an early age is important.

The BMA Family Doctor Book "Understanding ADHD, Autism, Dyslexia and Dyspraxia" advises GPs to refer people with Dyspraxia to an Occupational Therapist, who will take a medical and social history, and use a variety of Standardised Tests including motor skills, handwriting, visual-motor co ordination and sensory processing.

Once a diagnostic report of Dyspraxia and recommendations for 'reasonable adjustments' have been made (Equality Act 2010) this will help a child or adult in school, college or the work place to achieve their full potential.

The secondary effects of undiagnosed Dyspraxia in children and adults may include: temper tantrums, anxiety, depression, panic attacks, addiction, frequent job changes or long term unemployment.

Dyspraxia UK was set up to help children, young people and adults by providing a detailed diagnosis and practical strategies to get people successfully through their studies and into work.

We have specially trained Consultant Occupational Therapists in most parts of the UK.
Contact us with any queries or to arrange an assessment.
Dyspraxia UK have been professional, kind and supportive throughout. The report has given me a number of really helpful pointers towards an easier life.

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Dyspraxia UK offer a specialist occupational therapy service with high quality diagnostic assessments for children and adults in school, university and work

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Information for children and young people.

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Information for children and young people.

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What to do if…?

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"I can't handle the smell of the food you are cooking..."

"This food is disgusting... "

"I hate going to the mall, it is too loud and there are too many people..."
"Ahh, I can't handle this!"
Sound familiar?

When your child with sensory processing disorder becomes a teenager, it can be pretty terrifying... You start searching for ways to help them handle these new sensory situations...

You might feel lost, and like you don't even know where to start...

That's why I'm so excited that my friend Sara, an occupational therapist and sister to a teenager with autism, agreed to share with us some strategies to support your teen with sensory processing difficulties!
*This post includes affiliate links, please see my full disclosure for details.
Teens with sensory processing disorder have more emotional meltdowns and its hard to know how to support their sensory needs anymore. They seem to have grown out of the sensory strategies and tools that worked so well when they were younger.
I get it.
As a caregiver, I understand how you feel overwhelmed and not knowing how to support your teen in this new stage of life. As an occupational therapist, I am always working on learning new strategies and resources to support teens with their sensory processing needs.

I have a teenage brother with autism and as a family, we are always working to find sensory strategies that work for him know. He is a different person than when he was younger and he has new sensory preferences.
Teens are presented with new experiences and expectations.
Typically they want to gain more independence and control over their life, they are going through hormonal changes through puberty and they are presented with new social experiences... Sensory processing difficulties can make all of that a bit more difficult.

How do we support teens with sensory processing difficulties?

#1 Change Your Mindset:

As the parent, teacher, or therapist you need to be able to change your mindset for teens.

They are no longer your little child that needs all of your help to help them with their sensory challenges. You need to help foster where they are developmentally and help them through these new situations.

#2 Switch Up Your Sensory Activities:

You need to think of sensory activities that they will enjoy in this stage of life.Find sensory strategies that are meaningful to them. They may develop different sensory preferences and may need different sensory activities presented to them.

#3 Foster Independence:

They will want to explore more independence and make their own choices. They still may need guidance and support from us, but presenting sensory activities for them to choose from and let them decide what they would like to use will help them gain more independence.

Honor and respect their choices and encourage them to engage in problem-solving with you.

#4 Prepare for the Emotions:

Learn to respect that teens may be more emotional during this time of life. It's really helpful to recognize signs of anxiety and depression and seek out medical advice from a health professional with any concerns.

#5 Get Ready For New Social Situations:

They will be going through new social experiences and these may be more difficult for teens with sensory processing difficulties. They will be presented with more opportunities to go out to public spaces such as restaurants, the mall, or the bowling alley, for example. And in those new situations, they may be exposed to new foods, smells, sounds, or clothing textures and they may not know how to cope.

That is where the ebook, Making Sense of the Teen Years: A Sensory Processing Guide comes in. This ebook helps walk you through what your teen may be experiencing and find practical strategies and tips that you can use today to help your teen with these everyday situations.

The teenage years can be challenging and overwhelming... especially for teens with sensory processing difficulties. We hope to provide you with resources and strategies to help make your life a little less stressful to better support your teen.

Making Sense of the Teen Years: A Sensory Processing Guide was written from a unique perspective from a sister, mother, occupational therapist, and special education teacher on how to best support teens. We have poured our hearts and soul into this ebook because we know there are not many resources to address this topic for families.

Looking for other great resources to support your teen with sensory processing difficulties?

Check out the Free Calm Down Toolkit Guide for Teens to help you find out information about sensory meltdowns, self-regulation skills, calm down strategies, and what to put in a calm down toolkit for teens!

The Free Personal Hygiene Sensory Strategies Toolkit for teens is a quick go-to guide to find specific strategies to help teens be more independent with bathing, showering, brushing teeth, washing face, shaving, hair cutting and more!

For more adventures in teens and tweens, check out:

More Resources For Dealing with Sensory "Issues"

To help you remember some of these strategies and understand sensory behavior and what to do in the moment, I've put together this amazing poster set on how to understand your child's sensory struggles and discipline sensory meltdowns.

These posters give you tips on how to help your child regulate their sensory needs, and identify what your child's behavior is really telling you!

There's also a list of 7 common myths about sensory behavior. I dispel these misconceptions so you can gain a deeper understanding of what sensory really is.

Ok, you might be thinking...

This all sounds great but...

What should I do when my child is having a meltdown?

How do I create sensory strategies that are going to help my unique child?
And,

How exactly do I get them to use those strategies in the moment?

In my next blog post, I'll share how to create sensory tools that are going to help your specific child. I'll also tell you what to do in the moment when your child is in sensory overload and having a meltdown!

But right now, download your FREE Handle Any Sensory Challenge posters so you can get a deeper understanding of sensory and start implementing some sensory activities and routines with your family!

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5 Things You Need to Know to Support your Teen with Sensory Processing Difficulties

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How do you support your teen with sensory processing difficulties when the sensory strategies they've loved their whole life don't work anymore?

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It is a Sensory Issue? Symptoms and Signs of Sensory Issues in Children

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It is a Sensory Issue? Symptoms and Signs of Sensory Issues in Children

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Jessica processes sensory information differently

Her brain is interpreting the touch input from brushing her hair and cutting her nails more intensely (and potentially more painfully) than other people do.

She finds certain noises unbearable. This stops her from being able to participate at lunchtime. It seems that Jessica's brain is interpreting sound more intensely than others too. This is a sign of auditory sensitivity.

Jessica presents as having difficulty with modulating touch and noise sensory inputs. Therefore, it is likely she has over-responsivity (sensitivity) in both touch and hearing. There may also be some sensitivity with her vestibular system.

She finds learning new activities hard and struggles to plan and organise. Some sensory messages from her body aren't connecting smoothly to allow her to join in. This could mean she also has dyspraxia.

Signs of Sensory Issues - SPD Symptoms and Checklists

As we outlined on the page, unfortunately, SPD does not yet formally exist as a stand-alone diagnosis. Many of the challenges and behaviours we list in these checklists occur alongside other conditions. It is important to remember every child (or adult) who experiences sensory issues is different. There is no one size fits all. This also means there is not one treatment strategy that fits all. It is hoped that these checklists provide a starting point for you to consider if a behaviour might be linked to an underlying sensory issue. We always recommend you seek out extra support from professionals rather than using these lists to self-diagnose. In addition, we recommend you look at the additional resources and references below for more information.

This table gives examples of behaviours you might observe for the different types of responses. Use the tabs to look at the different responses. There are also sensory checklists at the bottom which you can also download.

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It is a Sensory Issue? Symptoms and Signs of Sensory Issues in Children -

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We describe the common signs of sensory issues you might see in children and adults. There's checklists for different sensory challenges.

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How to make life easier for yourself living with ADHD and those around you and how to find out more about your condition.

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Special Education and Inclusive Learning

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Sensory Learning Activities: An A-Z. Beyond Sensory play

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The ultimate A-Z list for teachers of sensory learning activities to use with your child or classroom. Taking learning beyond play.

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CHROMOSOMES R US - a celebration for World Down Syndrome Day

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CHROMOSOMES R US - a celebration for World Down Syndrome Day

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What is Dyscalculia? - The Dyslexia Association

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What is Dyscalculia? - The Dyslexia Association

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Developmental Dyscalculia, like dyslexia, is one of a family of specific learning difficulties.

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Referral information (ADHD pathway) - East and North Hertfordshire NHS Trust

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Your first point of contact is your GP, who will provide you with information and (if appropriate) make a referral to a specialist.

More information can be found on the link.

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Referral information (ADHD pathway) - East and North Hertfordshire NHS Trust

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We accept referrals from health professionals including GPs and school nurses/health visitors. Any concerns raised by schools about a child/young person should be communicated to the relevant health professional who will assess the child/young person and refer to the specialist services if appropriate. ADHD Pathway PDF Quick ADHD pathway Reference Guide PDF Click here for [...]

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Sometimes referred to as School Refusal

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Strategies for PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance)

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Pathological Demand Avoidance is a type of Autism characterised by extremely high levels of anxiety. People with PDA are generally best supported using 'non-typical' parenting strategies which I explain in more detail below.

These strategies can help both at home and school for children with PDA. I need to first of all give you this disclaimer though: I don't own a magic wand.

I wish I could personally help everybody who is facing these struggles at home, and I wish I could say that what works for us will work for you, but if you read on you'll see that one of the key messages about PDA is that what works today may not work tomorrow...

Nearly seven years on from diagnosis, I would say I'm an expert in my own girl with PDA. At times though, such as over the last few weeks when my catalogue of strategies seems to be wearing thin, it doesn't feel like I am any kind of expert. Times change, and you have to roll with it - that's true for parenting any child. Working out what works for children with PDA though can be a different level of exhausting.

So, my starting point for advice is....

Read more; understand the condition.

There's plenty of advice on the PDA Society website (incidentally, the PDA Society is formed of a group of parents who all have children with PDA themselves, and they all volunteer for the PDA Society to help others).

Cast aside any notion you have that typical, or stricter, parenting will work. In a previous post I've discussed in detail the difference between PDA and ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder), so I'd highly recommend reading that to understand more. In a nutshell, children with ODD will benefit from more rigid boundaries and good use of reward and consequence schemes; children with PDA do not respond in the same way. In PDA, the avoidance of, and refusal to comply with, everyday demands is driven by high anxiety. It is not caused by an inherent desire to be oppositional and gain attention.

Sure, a sticker chart or promise of a reward may work in the short term, but then again, it may not. So I totally understand when others are confused - 'but if she's done that once, why won't she do it again?'. The not-so-simple answer to that is that children with PDA are very complicated; they are spending a huge amount of time trying to cope with different pressures, some of which you can see and some which are not so obvious to those of us who don't have the same struggles.

Now onto the strategies...

Of course there are times when it might be totally necessary to use the word 'no' - a good example is when there may be danger involved. So yes, if a child is about to run in front of a car then an urgent 'stop' or no should be used, but it's important to save this kind of language for when the situation is most drastic. The child is then far more likely to listen and trust that it's important.

Direct demands should be removed from language wherever possible; there's a need to rethink all the words used to communicate. So no 'need, must, have to' and instead much more of 'may, could, would you like, how about' etc. More of 'I wonder if we might be able to..' or 'I'm not sure how to do this, do you think you can show me?'

Actions can be also phrased as a challenge or fun game rather than a direct demand. So instead of 'time to brush your teeth' we might say 'I bet you can't finish brushing your teeth before I've finished mine' or 'race you to the bathroom' (bearing in mind that children with PDA need to stay in control and therefore you are never allowed to win the game/race).

There's also the option of using a third (invisible) person to enforce rules for example - 'I don't think it's the best idea myself, but the health and safety people say it's very important' - as then the demand is not coming direct.

Use humour

This strategy kind of falls under the type of communication used as above but deserves a point all of its own I feel. We wouldn't achieve half of what we do with Sasha if we didn't act the clown occasionally, or phrase requests (not demands) light-heartedly.

So an example might be calling yourself stupid as you pretend not to see the pair of shoes which need putting on right in front of you. Humour can de-escalate a tense situation, or provide a distraction.

Reduce demands

Have you ever thought about how many demands are made in an average day? Before even leaving the house: wake up, get up, toilet/wash/brush teeth, get dressed, eat breakfast, get bag ready, then putting shoes and coat on. There's probably many more which could be added which we do on a daily basis. For a child who is worried about getting any one of those activities wrong, that's a whole heap of extra demands that need to be juggled. Add in any sensory issues, any difficulty with processing information and anxiety about time pressures, all of which are fairly common with autism, and the coke bottle effect is likely to come back into play.

Of course I'm not saying that we can just forget about doing any of these actions and just stay in all day (although sometimes, that's as bad as it gets), but we can appreciate the difficulties involved with these cumulative demands and try to make them easier. Sensory issues, and socks are never right? Maybe seamless socks could be considered. Having to leave by a certain time? Try to allow more time for getting ready, or alternatively consider whether that time for leaving can be pushed back in any way.

Pick your battles (or choose your challenges)

This is not the same as lowering your expectations, although that may also apply in many cases. It's a case of weighing up what matters more to you - is it clean teeth or leaving the house calmly? Obviously most of us would prefer both of those things to happen, but given that they won't, which do you choose?

If you drop the teeth brushing (not that I'm advocating that, in case my dentist is reading...), are you more likely to be able to leave the house on time in the morning because the rest of the routine runs smoothly?

It might be the choice between your child sitting at the dinner table for a meal, or them eating food with good nutritional value, wherever in the house they choose to eat it. It could be letting them choose to wear no coat in winter because they literally won't leave the house with one on.

For every family, the battles will be different, and for every family with a child with PDA, the scope of the battles is likely to change frequently (see point below about being spontaneous).

Tread carefully with routine

Routine can be good...except when you need to be spontaneous. For children with PDA and autism in general, there can be some comfort in knowing what is expected to happen as that reduces anxiety. Conversely however, being expected to do the same thing every day can be seen as a demand in itself and the child who wishes to retain control to manage their own anxiety levels may need to break this cycle in order to feel they are in control.

Told you it was exhausting, didn't I?!

I know that these are only 'topline' strategies and I wish I had the time to answer every individual query, such as 'what do I do when he won't leave the house?' or 'how do I get her to turn the iPad off and go to sleep?', but it would need to be an extremely long blog post to explain all the steps you'd need to try to get there. I'd maybe start by figuring out how important it is to you for your child to turn the iPad off at a certain time, and then think of maybe using all of the above strategies in order to try and achieve it. Being perfectly honest though, as I pointed out at the start of this post, it may work one day and not the next....

I'm well aware that some people will read this post incredulously, and use some hideous phrases such as 'picking and choosing too much', and 'what that child needs is some stricter boundaries'. I've heard them before sadly. I sigh, and I wish that I could invite them all to come and live with us and understand what it is that makes our younger girl different from our older girl. We see and live the difference every day.

I do feel extremely lucky in some ways that we had our other, neurotypical (typically developing, not autistic) girl first, as it made the different reactions from our youngest girl clearer for me to see. I'm also lucky that Sasha has mostly acted the same way in school and other environments as she does for me at home - she doesn't yet do the 'masking' which many other autistic girls seem to use as their own coping mechanism. Many children with PDA have the added fear of breaking the rules, so they do their best to conform at school all day. Sadly the effect this has is similar to a pressure cooker; when they are home again, where they feel comfortable, they are more likely to explode at even the smallest demand.

Half of the battle though is understanding. When you accept that your child is not doing this to you just to be oppositional but rather because of an underlying extremely high level of anxiety, then you can start to work around it and let go of some of the traditional parenting techniques which simply don't work. It may just lead to a calmer life all round.

Since writing this post I've shared a guest post on my blog, from a mum who also happens to be a specialist teacher, with some strategies aimed at those trying to educate these children. You can find that at Pathological Demand Avoidance: Strategies for Schools. For now though, I'm going to leave you with a link to the Positive PDA booklet which is aimed at schools and offers lots of practical examples of how to approach working with these children.

For more reading, please visit the great resources page which the PDA Society has produced.

For more information about PDA, please read the book shown below:

* this is an affiliate link and I may receive a small commission if you click and go on to buy anything. It won't cost you any extra.

(Other PDA books can be found in my

To find out more about our experiences, please check out our ' About Us' page or the summary of our experience in Our PDA Story Week 35. If you are looking for more online reading about Pathological Demand Avoidance, the posts below may help.

To follow me on other social media channels, you can find me at the following links or click the icons below!

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Strategies for PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance)

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Pathological Demand Avoidance is a type of Autism characterised by extremely high levels of anxiety. People with PDA are generally best supported using 'non-typical' parenting strategies which I explain in more detail below. These strategies can help both at home and school for children with PDA.

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A free online resource:

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Learn touch typing online using TypingClub's free typing courses. It includes 650 typing games, typing tests and videos.

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100 words that children in England are expected to be able to spell by the end of Year 6 (age 11)

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100 words that children in England are expected to be able to spell by the end of Year 6 (age 11)

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Sleep hygiene in children and young people

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If your child is routinely waking in the night, it is important that they learn to self-settle rather than seeking a parent or joining a parent's bed. This can be difficult to enforce, and may be emotionally challenging, for both child and parent, but parents should remain firm and assertive.

If your child leaves their bed and seeks you out at night-time, try not to engage them in conversation, but lead them quietly and immediately back to bed. This may need to be repeated several times each night, but it is important that your child learns that they will receive the same response from you each time.

If your child is anxious, the use of a night light, cuddly toy or baby monitor may help them to feel safe and learn how to self-settle.

Praising your child in the morning for staying in bed at night can help reinforce good behaviour; this can be aided by the use of a reward chart or stickers, with a small token prize when a certain number of stickers/rewards have been won.

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Sleep hygiene in children and young people

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This information sheet from Great Ormond Street Hospital (GOSH) explains about sleep hygiene. The lead-up and routine around your child's bedtime is referred to as 'sleep hygiene'. Having good sleep hygiene can help your child both to settle to sleep and

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Handwriting in Year 5 (age 9-10) | Oxford Owl

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In Year 5, your child will develop fluent joined-up writing, written in the appropriate way for different contexts.

Read on to discover the National Curriculum expectations for handwriting in Year 5, and to find out how you can support your child at home.

What your child will learn

In Year 5 (age 9-10), your child will learn to:

choosing which shape of a letter to use when given choices and deciding whether or not to join specific letters

choosing the writing implement that is best suited for a task.

How to help at home

There are lots of ways you can help your Year 5 child with handwriting. Here are our top ideas.

1. Try arts and crafts

Give your child opportunities to do arts and craft activities that allow them to experiment with a wide range of materials. For example, see if they can write with chalk, paintbrushes, felt tips, or crayons.

If you're at the beach, you could try writing in the sand. This gives your child lots of freedom to try different things without the pressure of having to get it right first time - if their handwriting isn't perfect, they can just wash or brush it away and start again.

2. Read a variety of books

Choose texts for your child that show a wide variety of formats and layouts. Be sure not to neglect non-fiction texts, such as magazine articles, brochures, adverts, newspaper columns, signs, and notices.

Showing your child these kinds of texts will give them experience reading in a real-world context, and will also prepare them for national assessments where they are expected to engage with a wide variety of text types. Make sure you talk together about how the texts are presented - the writing may look different depending on what kind of text you are looking at.

3. Write, write, write

Be on the look out for everyday opportunities for your child to practise their handwriting. For example, they could write out the shopping list that you dictate, mark events on the calendar, make greetings cards for family members, write out recipes or song lyrics, and so on. Try to find opportunities that link to their interests.

Be sure to find out what handwriting style your child is learning at school. Consistency is essential at this stage, so it is important not to correct something that you think is an error but that is actually part of the style your child is learning.

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Handwriting in Year 5 (age 9-10) | Oxford Owl

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In Year 5, your child will develop fluent joined-up writing, written in the appropriate way for different contexts. Read on to discover the National Curriculum expectations for handwriting in Year 5, and to find out how you can support your child at home.

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Handwriting in Year 6 (age 10-11) | Oxford Owl

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In Year 6, the National Curriculum guidelines for handwriting are very similar to what they are in Year 5. So, your child will develop fluent joined-up writing, written in the appropriate way for different contexts.

Read on to discover the National Curriculum expectations for handwriting in Year 6, and to find out how you can support your child at home.

What your child will learn

In Year 6 (age 10-11), your child will learn to:

choosing which shape of a letter to use when given choices and deciding whether or not to join specific letters

choosing the writing implement that is best suited for a task.

How to help at home

There are lots of ways you can help your Year 6 child with handwriting. Here are our top ideas.

1. Try arts and crafts

Give your child opportunities to do arts and craft activities that allow them to experiment with a wide range of materials. For example, see if they can write with chalk, paintbrushes, felt tips, or crayons.

If you're at the beach, you could try writing in the sand. This gives your child lots of freedom to try different things without the pressure of having to get it right first time - if their handwriting isn't perfect, they can just wash or brush it away and start again.

2. Read a variety of books

Choose texts for your child that show a wide variety of formats and layouts. Be sure not to neglect non-fiction texts, such as magazine articles, brochures, adverts, newspaper columns, signs, and notices.

Showing your child these kinds of texts will give them experience reading in a real-world context, and will also prepare them for national assessments where they are expected to engage with a wide variety of text types. Make sure you talk together about how the texts are presented - the writing may look different depending on what kind of text you are looking at.

3. Write, write, write

Be on the look out for everyday opportunities for your child to practise their handwriting. For example, they could write out the shopping list that you dictate, mark events on the calendar, make greetings cards for family members, write out recipes or song lyrics, and so on. Try to find opportunities that link to their interests.

Be sure to find out what handwriting style your child is learning at school. Consistency is essential at this stage, so it is important not to correct something that you think is an error but that is actually part of the style your child is learning.

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Handwriting in Year 6 (age 10-11) | Oxford Owl

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In Year 6, the National Curriculum guidelines for handwriting are very similar to what they are in Year 5. So, your child will develop fluent joined-up writing, written in the appropriate way for different contexts. Read on to discover the National Curriculum expectations for handwriting in Year 6, and to find out how you can support your child at home.

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What is Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA)?

EBSA is a term used to describe a group of children and young people who have severe difficulty in attending school due to emotional factors, often resulting in prolonged absences from school.

School avoidance can be seen as a coping strategy, a behaviour seen in pupils who, for whatever reason, are finding being in school difficult.

For some, an avoidant strategy might be used to miss particular lessons, whilst others might resist attending for longer stretches.

Where 'fight or flight' are the two most common basic responses for dealing with threat, this avoidant type of behaviour can be seen as 'flight': a way of getting away from the source of threat.

Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA) or "Anxiety Based School Avoidance" (ABSA) are two phrases commonly used to describe those students who are avoiding all or parts of school life, as a result of worry or anxiety.

What causes Emotionally Based School Avoidance in children?

There may be just one underlying cause, but of course there are more likely to be several, with EBSA often resulting from a complex interplay between home, school and within child factors.

Some examples could be to do with:

Social anxiety - fear of ridicule, isolation, social rejection, loneliness.

Anxiety around learning - fear of failure, ridicule, letting others down, a bleak future.

Health anxiety - fear of not being well, difficulty coping with physiological effects of being in school (e.g. sensory sensitivities), fear of loss or change.

The Psychology & Therapeutic Service would like to say a huge thank you to everyone who has contributed to the Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA) guidance and resources on these pages.

We are continually updating these pages and resources to broaden accessibility and ensure the information best meets the needs of children and young people and those who support them.

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EBSA is a term used to describe a group of children and young people who have severe difficulty in attending school due to emotional factors, often resulting in prolonged absences from school. School avoidance can be seen as a coping strategy, a behaviour seen in pupils who, for whatever reason, are finding being in school difficult.

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Dyspraxia or Developmental Co-ordination Disorder (DCD)

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Introduction

Dyspraxia or Developmental co-ordination disorder (DCD) is a condition affecting physical co-ordination which results in a child or young person having difficulties with daily activities. The activities that a child or young person may present difficulties with include self-care, writing, riding a bike and play as well as other educational and recreational activities which cannot be explained or attributed to any other medical cause. Developmental coordination disorder is not diagnosed in children less than 5 years of age. Not all children and young people with difficulties listed above will be given a diagnosis of DCD.

How is dyspraxia diagnosed?

You may contact your child's Health Visitor (if obvious concerns less than 5 years of age) or school nurse or GP to discuss developmental issues. If the school staff notices difficulties they would normally provide additional support before they seek a referral for further assessment. For many children this additional support may be enough to improve the required area. If there are no changes despite the school intervention, then you may be asked to seek a referral via your GP or the school nurse to the Children's Occupational Therapy Service or the Community Paediatrics Team. It is important to include with the referral as much information as possible about the support your child receives at school.

Following this referral and depending on the needs of your child, the Occupational Therapist may suggest carrying out specified activities from their website for a period of time before you are offered an assessment with a therapist.

In order for your child to be formally diagnosed with DCD, he/she will need to be assessed by a Paediatrician as this diagnosis can only be made by a doctor.

After assessment, appropriate guidance on managing his/her day-to-day difficulties would be recommended. This advice can be implemented into the school's existing strategy to support the child/young person.

Support groups

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Dyspraxia or Developmental Co-ordination Disorder (DCD)

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Dyspraxia or Developmental co-ordination disorder (DCD) is a condition affecting physical co-ordination which results in a child or young person having difficulties with daily activities. The activities that a child or young person may present difficulties with include self-care, writing, riding a bike and play as well as other educational and recreational activities which cannot be explained or attributed to any other medical cause.

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There are four levels to play, each divided into three stages.

You start by learning the home row keys. Each stage builds on previous lessons, introducing new letters as you progress and giving you plenty of touch type practice. You'll soon be touch typing like an expert! At the end of each level you can test your typing speed and get a fun reward.

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There are four levels to play, each divided into three stages. You start by learning the home row keys. Each stage builds on previous lessons, introducing new letters as you progress and giving you plenty of touch type practice. You'll soon be touch typing like an expert!

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Selective Mutism Training | Services for Schools North East

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Selective Mutism Training | Services for Schools North East

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A practical introduction to achieving meaningful outcomes for children with Situational Mutism in the school settings

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Emotionally based school avoidance (recording) - ACAMH

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Emotionally based school avoidance (recording) - ACAMH

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This webinar discussed Emotionally based school avoidance (EBSA) a term used to describe young people who have difficulty attending school due to emotional needs. Dr. Cat Halligan and Jemma Michelson who have developed and delivered the Royal Free Children’s Hospital School’s ‘LinkEdUP’ online reeng…

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School Anxiety and Refusal | Parents' Guide to Support

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It's normal for children and young people to feel worried about something that's happening at school - for example, when starting a new school or during exams. Sometimes, however, school can become challenging, stressful or distressing over a much longer period of time.

If your child is feeling anxious about school, or not able to go, it can be exhausting for both of you. Mornings in particular can become really stressful for the whole family, as you try to juggle your child's feelings alongside the need to get them to school and get on with your other responsibilities such as work. Even if you manage to get your child to the school gate, you might know how difficult they're going to find the day - or know that you'll be facing the same problem tomorrow morning.

If you're in this situation, we've got advice to help you explore what's going on with your child, make changes at school that can help, and find the support you need if your child can't go to school.

Young people can feel anxious about school for lots of different reasons. They might be worried about making friends or fitting in, find schoolwork or lessons confusing, feel pressured to learn in a certain way or find their relationships with teachers difficult.

Sometimes, going through difficult experiences outside of school - such as bereavement, an illness in the family or being a young carer - can also make it harder for a child to feel settled at school.

For some young people, the school environment isn't right for them, and trying to fit into it can create a huge amount of stress. This might be the case if they are struggling with their mental health, or have a neurodiverse condition or Special Educational Need (SEN) such as autism, ADHD, dyslexia or dyspraxia. This can make the school environment anxiety-provoking and exhausting, especially if their condition or need is undiagnosed or not being well supported.

Young people might show they're feeling anxious about school by:

not wanting to get up and get ready

saying they can't go

worrying a lot about small issues, such as having the right equipment for a lesson

feeling sick, or having stomach aches or headaches

not sleeping well

not doing schoolwork, or their grades dropping

being angry or upset, or acting out - at school or at home

withdrawing - seeming low, quiet or depressed

It's often difficult for your child to articulate the problem. They may be in a heightened state of stress and not know why or feel able to explain. Your child probably wants to feel able to be in school, just as much as you want them to be there. In many cases it just doesn't feel possible.

Sometimes it can be difficult to work out what's making your child feel anxious, and the first step is often helping them to identify exactly what's worrying them. Once you understand the problem, you'll be in a much better position to make changes that can help.

Young people can find it hard to explain what's causing their feelings, and might not be able to answer direct questions like 'what's going on?' Using an anxiety iceberg can help to open up the conversation - giving you a more relaxed way of exploring together what's causing their anxiety.

Watch our video to find out how to make an anxiety iceberg with your child.

If you're making an anxiety iceberg with younger children, you might want to draw images on the iceberg, or encourage them to write simple words. With older children and teenagers, you can ask them to write key words and phrases on the iceberg, or do this as a mind map, with 'school' in the middle and all the things they're finding difficult around the outside.

Through this exercise, you might identify worries such as arriving at school, finding the environment noisy or overwhelming, finding lessons confusing, feeling lonely through the day, or feeling uncomfortable during specific subjects.

Once you understand what's going on for your child, you can use their anxiety iceberg or mind map to communicate with the school and ask for specific changes.

Follow these steps to start a conversation with the school:

Here are some examples of things you can ask the school for:

Remember that even though this situation can be really tough for you and your child, it's a good idea to maintain a positive relationship with the school. Recognise the support they're offering and any changes they're making. This will help you work together to make things better for your child.

Building a relationship with the attendance team at my son's school was hugely helpful, we were talking with them each day.

If your child isn't going to school at the moment, it might feel incredibly stressful and tiring. You might be worried about when they will be able to get back to school or the impact on their education. Or you might feel overwhelmed because you're juggling this alongside work and other family commitments. Things are probably feeling tough for your child too.

During this time, it's important to keep working with teachers and other staff to try strategies that can help your child get back to school. Keep encouraging them to take achievable steps towards attending too. When the right support is in place, it's often easier for a young person to get back into their usual routine if they can return to school as quickly as possible.

If your child's anxiety about school has built up to the point where they can't go, it's a good idea to get them some professional mental health or SEN support. Find out how to do this further down the page.

Alongside requesting professional help, try to:

The school's SEN and attendance policies should be on their website. Knowing what these are can support you during meetings with the school.

This can help if your child is unable to go to school for a longer period of time and you need to ask for more support, including provision of alternative full-time education.

Encourage your child to get up, do some studying and stop for lunch at the same times they would if they were in school. This will make adapting back to school easier. Explain to your child that if they cannot go to school, they will need to study at home - at least until alternative arrangements are put in place. Ask the school to help you facilitate tasks and activities your child can do and use online resources such as BBC Bitesize.

Not going to school could leave your child feeling really isolated. Make sure they stay connected to the outside world by seeing friends and family, doing activities they enjoy and getting outside for walks and exercise.

Speaking to friends online can be really important if your child is feeling isolated at home. Sometimes, however, you might notice that your child is spending lots of time gaming or on their phone, and that this is getting in the way of important daily activities like spending quality time with family, learning, or sleeping and eating well. If this is becoming a problem, have a look at our guide to gaming or guide to social media for more information and advice.

Local authorities must provide alternative education if a child of compulsory school age is unable to attend school over a longer period of time. If your child cannot attend school because of a mental or physical health issue, the local authority should provide an alternative as soon as it is clear that they will be away from school for more than 15 days (either consecutively or over time). Find out how to request alternative education.

Getting back to school after weeks or months may feel extremely difficult for your child, but you and the school can help make it more manageable. Here are some things you can do to help:

Set small, achievable targets, such as visiting the building outside school hours or attending one lesson.

Request a home visit from a school staff member so your child can check in while feeling safe, see that the school cares and discuss any strategies that might help them.

Ask for a reduced timetable, with regular reviews to discuss building back up at a manageable rate.

Discuss changing classes or sets if your child thinks this would help.

Focus on qualifications needed for what your child wants to do next, perhaps dropping a less relevant GCSE to reduce stress.

My son wasn't questioned about his absence when he did feel able to pop in for favourite lessons, helping to ease him back into full days of education.

If your child is struggling with anxiety and it's affecting their day-to-day life, learning or relationships, it's a good idea to find some professional support. Speaking to the GP and finding them a counsellor or therapist are two good places to start. You can find more information about GPs, counsellors and other mental health services in our guide to getting support from mental health services.

If there is no other obvious reason for your child's inability to attend school, they may have an undiagnosed Special Educational Need (SEN) such as dyslexia, autism or ADHD.

If you think this is the case:

Speak to the school's SENCO or your GP to ask for a referral for an assessment.

While you are waiting for an assessment, you can also ask the SENCO to refer your child for support from other professionals, such as an Educational Psychologist or Speech and Language Therapist. These professionals can identify specific needs and make recommendations for additional support the school can put in place - even if your child hasn't had a formal diagnosis yet.

SEN support at school
If your child is diagnosed with SEN, extra support and adjustments should be put in place at school to help them attend and learn. This is called SEN support, and should be available within the school's existing resources. Speak to the school's SENCO in the first instance about how the school will support your child.
Education, Health and Care (EHC) plans
If you do not think your child's needs can be met by the school's existing resources, you can ask the local authority to carry out an Education, Health and Care needs assessment (EHC needs assessment). If the local authority decides your child needs additional support, they will then make an Education, Health and Care plan (EHC plan). This outlines how the extra support they need will be provided. Find out more about EHC plans.
Your Local Offer
Your Local Offer is the information, support and services available for young people with SEN, and for their parents and families. You can find out what support is available in your area by going to your local authority's website and searching for their Local Offer.

While we take care to ensure that the organisations we signpost to provide high quality information and advice, we cannot take responsibility for any specific pieces of advice they may offer. We encourage parents and carers to always explore the website of a linked service or organisation to understand who they are and what support they offer before engaging with them.

We have more tips and advice on supporting your child with school, and information about how you can get in touch with our Parents Helpline.
This page was reviewed in December 2022. It was created with parents and carers with lived experience of supporting their child or young person with school anxiety. We will next review the page in 2025. YoungMinds is a proud member of PIF TICK - the UK's quality mark for trusted health information.
Whether you love the page or think something is missing, we appreciate your feedback. It all helps us to support more young people with their mental health.

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School Anxiety and Refusal | Parent Guide to Support

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If your child is anxious about school, or refusing to go to school at all, read our tips and advice on how you can support their mental health.