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It started when I was about 2 years old. My mom always tells me that I was a “Mommy’s baby.” My dad never took care of me unless he absolutely had to. It was mainly all my mom. This exhibits Erikson’s first stage of the psychosocial stages, basic trust versus mistrust. This stage is typically seen in infants to two years old. In this stage, they start to decide whether they can trust a person and/or object. With my mom always being the one taking care of me, I attached to her more due to me trusting her more.

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As the years went on, it got a little difficult. Around three, my mom got a job. That means she left me with my dad more often. When under my dad’s care, I was constantly in a play pen, but as soon as my mom got home from work, I was able to do what toddlers do. This point in my childhood was very confusing. I hadn’t quite figured out the second stage, autonomy versus shame and doubt. In this stage, from ages two to four, children start to balance their self-determination and being controlled by others.

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Moving into about age 5, my mom finally moved out, and took my sister and I with her! She allowed me to do the things that kids do, feel the things that kids feel, and I flourished! Although I wasn’t always an angel child. A little after we moved out, I started to miss having my mom in the home because my dad wasn’t there. I started to act out, and even took it to lengths of cutting my own hair while under the care of my grandmother. I just wanted to see if this would get my mom’s attention. It did, and I got in a lot of trouble. This led me into Erikson’s third psychosocial stage, initiative versus guilt. In this stage, children learn they want and can do more, but not always is the “more” acceptable. My mom giving me full range to be a kid gave me initiative but cutting my hair and seeing how upset it made her made me feel guilt.

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After a few years, everything was fine, and then I started middle school. Everything started to go downhill from here. I started to get bullied, but I kept myself in sports to keep my mind away from it. My dad never came to any of my games which caused me to fall out of sports. Falling out of sports caused me to fall into the bullying, and I was diagnosed with depression. I had to change schools and start therapy. Everything flipped upside down for me. I felt inferior to everyone I came across. This brings me to the fourth stage, industry versus inferiority. This stage typically begins at age 5 and continues through age 12. In these ages, children start to learn the skills or customs in their society. At first, I started with industry, but then everything went south into inferiority. With going to therapy and changing schools, it helped me out a lot.

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Growing up with only my mom, you’d think I’d have some sort of identity crisis, but this was never the case. My mom always gave me free right to be who I wanted to be. Because of this, I’ve always had a sense of who I am or who I want to be. She has always supported every decision I’ve made, whether it was good or bad for me, and that means the most to me. It impacted my values and how I look at life. Most importantly, it allowed me a safe space to fall back on just in case it wasn’t as I planned. This exhibits Erikson’s fifth stage, identity versus role confusion. During ages thirteen to nineteen, adolescents start to develop their sense of self, sexual identity, values, occupation, etc. I feel as though my mom always gave me free range to try to be whatever I wanted to be. For this, I have an identity.