# data[].attributes.body
Date: 08/23/24

The first thing I remember buying is a bra. Looking back to this experience with buying this item was personal. The feeling I felt was excitement. Excitement because I know I was growing up. It represented physical change. I was in eighth grade when I started working (under the table) at the Flea Market on the weekends. This is where I get the money to purchase anything that I need. The satisfaction I felt was a strong sense of achievement and ease in wearing something that made me feel what maturity looks like. Over time when I started purchasing more the satisfaction  become less especial as I discoverd that there's more item  more comfortable and fitting. Social pressured played a big role to my desicion on buying my first bra. As a female body changes over time. I started looking at my self-image. The social-physical expectation around me; school, friends and family created the sense that having and wearing a bra is one of the important essential of a female body.

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Contrasting Marxist and Durkheimian perspectives

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Contrasting Marxist and Durkheimian perspectives

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Date: 08/23/24

One food that serves as a totem in my life is rice, white rice especially. Growing up in  Asia (Philippines,) rice was eaten in a daily basis. It's a staple. We consume it every day;  breakfast, lunch and dinner. I look at rice more than just a food item. To me this symbolized unity and bring comfort and culture identity. The rituals surronding rice include the day to day preparation, where everyone gathers around the table and have an understanding of one another that rice is a requirement item of almost every meal. This represents tradition all over Asia. Everywhere you go in the Philippines, whether in a restaurant, street foods, or store around the corner, you will find rice. Even in the pictures I have looked at before my time, you will find rice on the table. It is associate to my ancestors who depend on rice as part of thier diet. The process of cooking rice requires balance, (rice, water and fire) attention and love. Through a Marxist lens, the material context of rice holds a connection that concealed by the the culture importance. My grandfather was a farmer. I witness how rice was planted, cared and harvest. People who do the hard work (labor) that pertain to producing rice are often from lower socioecomonic, like my granfather. He had his own land (landownwer)  so it is safe to say he was able contol the means of production. The hardship that was put in was taken for granted by the consumers.
Lastly the relationship and practices that I have been concealed is the culture backround of rice. Fucosing on tradition and how much we enjoy eating rice. Additionally, the ritual of eating rice together , hides out that fact this was prepared by women. In the Philippines culture, women are one responsible of preparing food or also known as domestic task.

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Date:08/23/24

There's a three reason why Im taking this class. Firstly, this class is one of prerequisites that  I have to take to attend Nightigale College in the future. Secondly, researching what is Sociology online beore taking this class to graped what Im getting into. I was fascinated. I want to see what this class can offer me and apply it to my daily basis; to gain "sociology imagination," broader and more systemic understanding of the worl around me. Lastly to learn how individual behavior/s, practices and factors or the outcome from everyone's experience.

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Date: 09/14/2024

I went to Strabucks in Valley Spring, more like stop over. When I walked in, the atmosphere was relaxing and welcoming. The staff greeted me and other customers that came in. The music (Bruno Mars playlist) was playing and people around me are smiling, making eye contact and some of them are focused on thier phone and laptop. The interaction among stranger are polite. They say 'hi' to each other and twiced that it turned into a longer conversation for the time that I was there. I noticed that people doesn't seem to be bothered that they sit close to each other. I observed that most customers are mix of ages between 20-65 years old who dressed casually. The race and ethinicities that came in was diversity, they came in with a group of people, mostly couples. I also notice that some customers are regular, I say this because when the customer's turn to order, the staff asked "the regular?" and the customer responded "yup, you got it!" with the smile.

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Doing Sociology Research and How Sociology Do Research

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Doing Sociology Research and How Sociology Do Research

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Date: 09/16/2024

I gathered few educational things about this chapter.
Why man rape. I agree that men doesn't rape because of revealing clothes. But I do think it plays a part of men imagination. If this doesn't have to do with the clothes that women wear, why do men tell their female loves one to go change because the clothes she's wearing is ''too reaveling?'' They know how some men thinks because they share the same logic.
Most rapist, when they get caught, often this is the axcuse they use "her clothes."

I wished the chapter talked about how the victim effects her everyday life. I would think that women will not want to talk about what happened to them. This women needed to voiced thier experience to feel better but the research didn't state anywhere if they also talk about this experienece to their close friends or significant other. I believe they would act differently or just say " I dont want to talk about it."

The ''taking a role of others," might play a role. People act certain way and talk when they closely know this  person. Maybe the victime doesnt want to talk about it after all because the mom would cry and yell, while the dad might do something that he might regret.
Going back to why men rape. Drugs can be a role like the whisky that was mention in the book, but what about any other drugs? such as marijuana.

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Date: 9/16/2024

Before reading the chapter, the title would you hire and ex-convict? I answered to myself, yes! depending on what is the crime? and what age did they commit this crime? what education did they finish?
While reading the first page, I came to realization that I am part of this social studies. I am one of those people who gets closer to the light because I thinking the light will turn green faster. In my head maybe the sensor will pick it up that there's an object.
Devah Pager didnt really talk about the crime itself but focuses on African American and American (black and white,) who will more than likely to get hired. It sad to read that until this day there's still a racial discrimination. I find it unfair that African American will less likely to get hire even when a white person have a recond of felony conviction.
Thinking outside the box, I question myself again. Does this black person have the qualification to get hired? such as education and experience. What if they hire the white person because his better at communicating. I have a brother who has a record. When applying for a job the application will ask you if you have a criminal record. Once it's reviewed the hiring manager will ask on the job interview when and how. The applicant can give a explanation to why they commit the crime. I say to myslef, maybe the white person is just like my bother, if they regret doing it and express it anf the hiring personel convice that you will deserve the chance to turn your life around, will hire you before anyone who doesn't have the experience and education.
Employer often refuse to hire people who has record because the risk.
Few years ago I read something online that prisoners somewhere in Europe receives experience and education while in prison, so when they get out they can look for a stable job.
Here in United States the system is far different. Ofcourse the percentage of getting reoffend is more than likely will be higher! Especially if the person who has record can find a job. Now days some company accepts convict felonies but depending on how serious the crime is. We should have a warehouse company who only hires people who has records.
One question I have after reading this chapter on page 65, where is stated "black men have the likehood," about 28 percent. How do they know? what research did they use?

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Date: 09/16/2024
The first page I gathered that Ads promotes or play a role why consumers buy the merchandise. This because the belief that this will bring them happiness. Im one of them.

When it talked about the advertisement about cleaning product, man was present. They did this because they want higher sell? or they dont have to look like there's sexism?
Nature of Empirical Evidence. It's fastinating how it explained how information derived from observing, experimenting and maybe experiences. This can be theory or just people/person trying to solve something logically. In sociology, how many people they need to inteview or survey to form a solid analyses and conclusion. Is this accurate? Jut like the book stated about philosophy. There's no right or wrong , good or bad. The questions arise when there's an answers but not enough evidence. Just like anecdote evedice. But for the evidence to be empirical there's need to be verifiability. What happpened when all of the interviewer have a person who falsies?
On page 405 explained  the idographic and nomothetic. I dont see the difference. It the same to me. The goal is to simplify but detailed. Methods is to interview and survey.
Ethnography is a term of being present to observed people around. The culture, age, how they dress and ther behaviors. Just like the required entry this is a lived experiment.
Standardized question can be a good thing or bad. This depends of what kind of question is bieng ask. Yes or no questions. This may lead to lack of depth. But it can help researchers get a somewhat accurate data.
Having to take online class for the first time,  due to working a full time job and to provide and care for family. This confirmed that Im one of the experiments. Because Im navigating to learn new teaching methods.

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Goffman, The Presentation of the Self in Everyday Life

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Goffman, The Presentation of the Self in Everyday Life

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Date: 9/17/2024
In the beginning of the book he used the methaphor of the theater by Willian Shakes Spear to explain how people present themself in social interactions. From what I gathered he was talking about people on the stage, which we see everyday, like myself or yours. Just like actors and actresses they put on a role while they are doing the job. As soon as the curtain closes, thats when they can be at ease. We as individuals, when we go to work we leave our personal lives behind but when we get home we can be ourselves and relax.
The second thing I gathered from this Chapter is when people dress themselve, how they act and talk. By dressing yourself alone people will judge you. There's a saying "dont judge a book by its cover." Sometimes Im guilty, I cant help it but to judge someone. It's just a natural thing. When you meet someone the firt thing you see is the appearance. For example: when you see a women in a long skirt with thite long sleeve and black stiletto that match her purse. You would think shes a business woman or work in school or some type of law.
Lastly, I gathered that people change or adjust their behaviors accordingly to the people they are interacting with. I learned that next time I will watch closer on how the other person affects me because Im able to break from it, especially if it gives me anxiety.

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Thompson, Handling the Stigma of Handling the Dead

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Thompson, Handling the Stigma of Handling the Dead

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Reading this Chapter made me understand why morticians and the funeral directors would want to keep their occupation on the low. Now days people think that death is taboo and this type of work is dirty or disturbing.
Keeping it professional is the key for this job. I am a true beliver that you should still respect the dead bodies.
Using humors on the job to make it easier to deal with what you do, I would find it difficult.
As a CNA, I some what have a grasp on how workers from funeral home feels. I have witness five deaths while doing this job. The first thing I have to do in make sure that they have no pulse and inform the charge nurse. When it's confirm. I have to change and clean the dead body. I have to make them look presentable for their love ones when they visit.
To work in a funeral home, especially to be a embalmer or mortician, I believe I would be able to perform the role. The only problem is that, I wont be able to separate my work life and personal life. Over time maybe I will but this will cause me to be numb.
What I find it funny in this chapter  is the qoute, "pay now, die later." How can you really advertise? People needs to wake up and start planning, because we dont know what tomorrow brings us.
If I was  the funeral director and I run my own business. I would not care what anybody thinks. I would take pride that my business is successful. I help families for their love ones, to see them one last time (presentable.)
I don't think it's faunting when you have nice things. I would tell myself I deserve this

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Date: 09/19/2024

In the beginning of this chapter, it caught my attention when it was talking about everybody wanting to be unique. That there are no two snowflakes the same. This is true. Who doesn't want to be unique? I know I do. But realistically, nobody is truly unique. I've met two people who similarly have the same food taste, dress, and attitude as me. Although we are so similar, yet so different.

The word paradox, although the book gave a definition and example, I had to re-read it because from my understanding, there is no false or true about something. You can determine it and still be unsure.

While I kept reading, pg. 278 just proved my point above. People are similar but yet so different. All of us share the same traits, humor, and other personalities. A good example would be: a person who is a CNA and the other is a teacher. They share common personality traits. They both need to be patient.

Dramaturgical, this is a long word. With my accent, I can barely pronounce it. It's a metaphor! I'm not good at metaphors. But this one I couldn’t agree more with. Whenever my dad comes around, I feel like a little girl, but when I hang out with my mom, I have to act like a grown adult. Otherwise, I will hear something like, "Act your age, use your brain."

This book also talked about gay and lesbian. It's insane how this was classified as a mental illness back in the day. Nowadays, people are more open, even though some are still homophobic and don’t agree with the LGBT community. I am proud that people can be so accepting these days.

On pg. 284, dressing well is not just for yourself but for people around you. I went on a job interview last week. I got the job! Imagine if I went in with sneakers and ripped jeans with a T-shirt that has symbols? I don’t think this hiring manager would hire me. Dressing well plays a role, but often it goes beyond that; it also plays a role in how you engage with others in social and professional settings.

Brand and the self. The brand that I like the most is called Mandala. They have vibrant colors and features like lots of pockets! The colors allow me to express my personality freely. The brand that I stay away from is the brand called Figs. I feel frustrated by this brand. They don’t offer sizes that fit me. I feel like they only cater to certain body shapes. They failed to overlook and neglected the diversity of their customers.

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Date: 9/19/2024

One of the assignments from this class, I can recall it asked us what is similar about buying something to fit in. I chosed a luxury purse. This chapter talked about brands. People buy luxury items to signal social status, but from what I learned, buying this purse to fit in was not the case. It has to do with relationships. Once I established it, I realized that the reason I felt left out was because I didn’t grow up with my cousins. I do see some people splurging on high-end products to make themselves feel satisfied and show others their social status. But sometimes, some people buy these things and are broke. They spend like they have wine money, but in reality, they only have beer money.
People shop in different grocery stores. For me and my boyfriend, we shop at Walmart, Winco, and Food 4 Less. We don’t really care for organic stuff. We do, but it gets expensive, especially having two kids.
When I was younger, my friend and I liked to go to the mall and hang out for a while. We would look around, and our favorite store at the time was Forever 21. They had clothes with different styles and affordable prices. Now that I’m older, I don’t like to be in a place and look around. It’s easier to just go online and search for what you are looking for, and it comes to your door 3-5 business days later, sometimes overnight.

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Date: 9/19/24
Opening up this book and reading the title, "If Hitler Asked Me to Electrocute a Stranger?" my answer is NO. It's insane how people participate in an experiment like this. Following someone because of their authority is dangerous. But when I look at it in the context of how we act today, an example that I can provide is my job. A nurse asked me to change a colostomy bag. I knew that it was beyond my scope, and the rules have recently changed so that CNAs can no longer perform this task. I felt pressured, but I didn't want to risk my license, so I said no. Later on, she asked another CNA to do it, and she did it. Her reason was that she didn’t want the nurse to be upset with her because she’s the charge nurse, and she felt like she had to do it.
Guards in prison act a certain way because they have to watch their backs; I get it. But why? Because inmates can be violent? If you really think about it, maybe they act the way they do because those guards are too aggressive and abuse their power. They call it a power trip.
Growing up, I felt like I was the parent for my two younger siblings. Before my mother left us to work far away and my dad had another family, they both trained me to be kind and treat my siblings well. Because if I didn't, there would be consequences. I feared what the punishment would be. As a kid, the tension was there.
People will always come across situations where they make choices because of someone who has authority and are influenced by them.

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Date: 9/19/24

I remembered a time I purchased a designer bag in Italy while visiting my mom. I bought it because everyone around me; family and  friends owned high-end  purses, and I always felt left out when I spent time with them. Almost as if having a high-end purse was a requirement to fit in. This purse became a symbol of fashion but more of status of life. Having the purse made me feel more included and blended in. However, the satisfaction went away when I realized that connecting with my family members and friends was based on deeeper bonds, not just the items we owned. I didn't grow up here in United States, communicating was challenging for me. People around me was tired of me asking  them to paused conversations so I can look up the defenition or Google Translate. I read books everyday, watch movies, pay attention to every sign I saw during walks or drives, even mimicking voices to improve my language skills. My experience have shaped me to have a deeper understanding of what's important in relationships: connecting with people rather than a item that symbolizesof fashion or status.

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Date: 09/23/2024

In the beginning, the book talked about middle-class people. I said to myself, "Oh! I'm part of the middle class." While I kept reading, realization hit me. I'm poor. I have a full-time job, the company pays for sick and vacation hours, and I pay for health insurance. I don't drive the latest car model. Yes, I can get a credit card, but I'm in debt. I worry about how expensive groceries are these days. For me, Ehrenreich is a rich woman, not middle class.
I can't see myself leaving everything behind just to experiment with what it's like to be poor. Again, only rich people would do something like this. The idea of leaving everything behind is scary. Maybe, just maybe, if I had to start this experiment with a place to sleep. This world can be cruel sometimes. I'm a girl, and I can’t be on the street late at night.
After a while of reading this, Ehrenreich decided to work for herself and pay herself $7 an hour. I thought to myself that this is a great idea, but this experiment would be useless. She managed to find a job as a waitress. Being a waiter isn't that bad. I was a waiter before. Since I wasn't the only one, the tips we got from customers would go into a jar by the kitchen, and we split it with everybody at the end of our shifts.
I work a full-time job and often have to pick up extra shifts to cover all my living expenses. I can relate to the book itself. Having multiple jobs isn't enough to pay for all the basic necessities.
Having two jobs affects not only my physical health but also my emotional well-being. My body is tired all the time, and my mind, sometimes it can’t function properly (I get forgetful). I'm in school, struggling to find time to study and navigate life in general.
Ehrenreich talks about calculating and budgeting. If people knew how to budget just like her, for sure we would have money in our savings accounts.
As a person who did not grow up in the United States, I sometimes think the American system is broken. For example: a person working in a warehouse, getting paid minimum wage. Most apartments require 2.5 to 3 times the monthly rent amount on your paycheck stubs. They call it the 3X rent rule. With this salary, how can a person get an apartment?
Let's talk about government assistance. To qualify, you need to make less than $900 a month to get help with food, housing, cash, and many other things.
I was excited about coming to America because I thought it was true what I'd heard: "The American Dream." America taxes everything, and by the end of the year, you don’t really get a lot from income tax. For some people, they even have to pay.
In the book, it covered people struggling to keep up with the cost of living, and the issue with the system. I agree with both of these points. As the reader, this was well put together. I was able to visualize what was being delivered

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Date: 09/28/2024

According to Leidner, she stated that often managers in McDonald's micromanage the workers to make sure they are doing a good job. But this is sometimes is not a good thing. I have worked in a facility like this. This can lead to employee turnover. Micromanagement can drive a good employee away. If they feel suffocated by lack of freedom or manangers hoovering over their shoulders, they may leave the company. Micromanaging can also cause burn out for both managers and employees. Employess may fee overwhemed and manager may burn out from over involvement in day-to-day operations.
Just like any other job, Mcdonal's provides breaks to their employees to make sure they remain productive and consistent thoughout their shifts.
Working in this type of environment, often, you need to leave your personal life behind. In this type of environment, you constantly needs to smile and be friendly, managing the same emotion during their shifts.

I understand why people leave the job in a short period of time, because the room to excel is limited.

Mcdonalds has a dispensery machine on how much ketchup can be can be in a hamburger, I wish I can say this is impressive.
What's impressive is that Mcdonal has a University called, "Hamburger University." The workers here that trained people are called the doctors of hamburgerology. I've never thought theres such thing! The company broke the job down step-by-step, almost like a idiot-proof. This is almost insulting. They also made it easy for the workers (cash registers) so that way, you don't have to compute. When I was youonger I applied, I was given a accessment (basic math) before you can get the job. Im not sure if they still do that. Manager is always doing inventory, when they are missing goods, they suspects either they are giving it away of taking it.

Both manager and worker of Mcdonals are not always following the rules. I feel like its like this with any other job, we dont always obey rules. As long as your not bending the rules that will cause you to harm other or yourself.

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Date: 09/28/2024

Pick a corporate brand that you connect with or that seems meaningful in the lives of those around you. Discuss how this corporation might seve as a cultural pedagogue, teaching consumers specific lessons about thier lives, messages be considered ideological, especially in regard to how the firm pays its worker? Have any of these ideological messages reach the level of hegemony - that is, come to be seen as common sense

I pick NFL clothing  as a corporate brand that I connects with me.  National Football League, its a branded clothing but also serves a cultural force in my life, family and friends. NFL clother which includes sweaters, hats, jersey and other apparel emblazond with the team logos and colors. For me and the people close to me, this  more than just a clothing (sportwear). It's a represent loyalty. The NFL teach consumers values and loyalty. It also carry a message of ideological weight that can reach of hegemony. Football is widely accepted in American culture. Representing your team is part of indentity and became natural, ways to express that also practices hegemonic.

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The fast food campaign, workers are fighting for $15 minimum wage and the right for fast-food worker to unionize. Back then I can say Im able to relate to this movement. Im all for quality and workers' right. But in today's new wage, fast food workers makes more than I do.

I can agree about the little job security, low benefits and most of the time in fast food restaurants they don't let you choose what dates you want to pick up. With the unpredictable schedules, workers are often try to find a better job and this cause hight turn over rate. This is one of the reason why I only last 2 weeks in Jack in the Box when I used to for for them when I was 17 years old. I hated the schedule. I was a teenager with no life.

The campaign argues that paying workers equal will improve their lives and reduce goverment assistance to balance local economy.
Being with the union, you would think, they would give you higher pay, better benefits, health insurance and give worker's  more consistent schedule.
This movement can be succesful with public support.

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Date:10/05/2024

When readingChapeter 3:Fast-Food Blues:Work in a Global Economy, I couldn't help but apply my own personal experience working in a low-wage job when I was younger at Jack in the Box. I can relate to the struggles they experiences, as I worked a similar role in the fast-food industry. The chapter talks about how the low pay and limited opportunities for advancement makes it  difficult for employees to have a better future. Without education or training, moving into higher positions is impossible. Sure, if you work for a company long enough, you might have a shot at becoming a manager, but that’s about as far as most employees can 'realistically' go.
Looking back on my own experience atJack in the Box, going in every day felt like I was trapped in an endless cycle that would never change. The first thing is to clock in and then after it was always the same. I already knew what to expect from the manager and my daily responsibilities. My roles included cooking, taking orders, and dealing with rude customers. I had to constantly remind myself that the customers were always right, no matter how unreasonable they might be. This expectation forced me to put on a cheerful face and be friendly, all while trying to manage the stress that came with the job. It felt like I was performing for an audience that never fully appreciated the effort I put in. I was doing all this for a paycheck that was barely enough to cover my basic bills (wifi, phone bill, and gas money) which only added to my frustration  with the job.

The book stated the issue of benefits, which is an aspect of the fast-food industry that I experienced firsthand. Many workers, including myself, were part-time employees, and this limited our access to benefits like health insurance or paid time off. Only the managers were the lucky one, enough to receive benefits. This lack of support from the company made it  challenging to see a long-term future at Jack in the Box. Who would want to stay with a company for years, investing time and energy into a position that only pays low wages with no real acknowledgment or reward?

The chapter makes it clear that fast-food restaurants are designed to keep costs low and profits high, which often comes at the expense of employee welfare. While I understand the business needs to make money behind this structure, it feels like that company prioritize their profits over  their workers. A simple gesture to say thank you, such as providing free meals from their menu, could s improve employee  loyalty and keep doing a good job. By doing this, it could make a world of difference in how employees feel about their jobs and the company.

My experience is more than just a personal, I realized it in a broader context after reading this chapter. It helped me see that I am part of a larger issue and that many people working in the fast-food industry. The high turnover rates in these restaurants are not the result of individual choices but the broader systemic issues within the industry. Many workers find themselves trapped in a cycle  just like I did. Searching for better opportunities elsewhere. Reading this chapter provided me with insights into why so many employees come and go in these roles, seeing light on the challenges we all face.

Overall, my experience in the fast-food industry aligns closely with the points discussed in Chapter 3. It made me more aware of the systemic issues at play and helped me understand the larger economic forces that shape the conditions of low-wage workers. This reflection has not only allowed me to better comprehend my own struggles but also to appreciate the collective challenges faced by others in the fast-food sector. The chapter reinforced the idea that change is necessary and that it is crucial to advocate for improved working conditions and fair compensation for those who dedicate their time and efforts to such demanding roles.

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Date: 10/05/2024

Growing up in my family, taking care and other duty to family is part in our culture. In the Philippines, it's common for children to take care of thier parent when they get olde, and this followed me even after moving to United States. I have experience this when my grandmother was sick, and it was mostly my aunt who took care of her. Some of my family still in the Philippines even rely on thier older siblings financially. This responsibility for family members is something that has been there as long as I can remember. It's as if your whole life revolves around fulfilling the expectations set by your parents, siblins and the older generation. The same was true for my aunt and me when it came to our grandmother's care.

As much as I loved my family and wanted to help, there were times when the burden became overwhelming. I still remember hearing the words, "My husband and I are the reason why you got here in the United States," whenever I resisted working in my aunt’s business on the weekends. That phrase was used as a constant reminder of the sacrifices my family had made to bring me here, as if that meant I was indebted to them and obligated to take on any role they needed me to, no questions asked. It didn’t matter that I was balancing school, taking care, and growing up, I was expected to work for the family.

This obligations some what dragged me, especially when it came to caring for my grandmother. My aunt and I had to go around our lives for her needs. It was frustrating because I can see that my aunt couldn’t focus on her own life, work, or love life. She sacrificed so much of her time, and I watched her struggle with that sacrifice. In a way, it mirrored what I was going through as well. I was juggling school, my responsibilities at home, and helping take care of my siblings. I barely had time for myself, and I didn’t get to enjoy my childhood the way other kids did. I was consumed by the feeling that our family expected us to do everything, especially since my grandmother lived with us.

It got to the point where I didn’t even go out with friends anymore because I was constantly worrying about what was happening at home. If I left, I’d find myself thinking, “What if my aunt needs help with my grandma?” I couldn’t relax or enjoy my time away because I felt this unspoken obligation to always be available, always ready to step in and help. I cared deeply for my family, but it felt like the weight of responsibility was always on my shoulders.

Mary Wishard's essay, "Caught Between the Ager," are similar  with me because it reflects my own experience. Wishard describes how middle-aged adults are often stuck between caring for their aging parents while also managing their own lives and sometimes still raising children. In my case, although I was younger, I felt caught between the needs of my grandmother, my siblings, and the demands of school. It was this constant juggling act that left me feeling exhausted and emotionally drained.

In Wishard’s essay is talked about the concept of role conflict, the stress that comes from being pulled in so many different directions. That was exactly how I felt. I was trying to be a good student, take care of my siblings, and be there for my aunt and grandmother, but it seemed like no matter what I did, I was always falling short somewhere. I couldn’t give my best to any one area of my life because my attention was always divided. This made me feel alot of frustration and guilt. I wanted to do well in school and have a normal childhood, but I also felt obligated to fulfill my family’s expectations.

Wishard’s , stated about how middle-aged caregivers often feel they’re sacrificing their own lives to meet family obligations, and I saw this happening to my aunt. She had her own career and personal life, but it was always on hold because of her role as my grandmother’s primary caregiver. It was her job to take care of my grandmother, just as it was mine to help out wherever I was needed. This pressure wasn’t explicitly spoken, but it was felt deeply, especially by the women in our family.

One of the hardest parts for me was the emotional isolation  that came with taking care of my grandmother. While other kids my age were enjoying their weekends, spending time with friends, or focusing on themselves, I was helping at home. I didn’t resent my grandmother or my family, but I felt incredibly alone. It was like no one understood how hard it was to balance everything. When you’re in a situation like that, it’s easy to start feeling isolated and to believe that you can’t complain because you’re “just doing your duty.” But the reality is, I was struggling.

Wishard also talks about how caregivers often feel overwhelmed and burned out because they don’t get enough support. That was something I definitely felt. It was just my aunt and me for the most part, and we were expected to handle everything. No one really acknowledged how much we were sacrificing or the toll it took on us. There wasn’t much space for us to ask for help or take a break because family obligations were seen as non-negotiable.

This constant pressure led to what Wishard would call caregiver burnout. For my aunt, it was about not having time for her own life, and for me, it was about missing out on a childhood that should have been more carefree. I often felt torn between wanting to live my own life and feeling guilty for even thinking that way. It’s hard when you’re expected to be selfless and available at all times, and it took a real toll on my mental health.

Looking back, I understand that my family’s expectations came from a place of love and duty, but that doesn’t change the fact that caregiving can be incredibly demanding. Wishard’s  helped me see that I wasn’t alone in feeling caught between different roles and responsibilities. It validated my experiences and gave me a way to understand why I was struggling so much at the time.