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Dorchester, Boston

Joan Frances MacDonald was born on June 19, 1936 to Mabel and Allan (Mac) MacDonald, who had met and fell in love in the youth group at St. Mark’s Episcopal Church, Dorchester, Boston.  Joan grew up in a walk-up flat, living nearby her maternal uncles, aunts, cousins, and grandparents.  She was an only child and was very close to her cousins. In her early childhood, the country was gripped by the Great Depression.  Her father was a laborer and a truck driver, and he was employed for a time by President Roosevelt’s WPA (Works Project Administration).  Her mother worked as a clerk in small retail businesses.  Joan spent time with her mother after school while she worked in a bakery and in a movie theater. Her grandfather drove a milk delivery truck, and sometimes Joan joined him on his rounds.

Joan was a natural athlete, playing baseball and going to Boston Red Sox games in Fenway Park with her father.  She always wore her mitt, just in case.  At one game, she caught a home run! The family remained active at St. Mark’s.  Joan attended Boston Latin School, the first school founded in the United States.  In 1954, she was the first in her family to attend college and enrolled at University of Massachusetts, Amherst with an interest in botany.

In the meantime, a new seminarian had begun to work at St. Mark’s, assisting the rector.  Mabel and her best friend, the rector’s wife, grew fond of this young man and thought he would be perfect for their beloved Joan.  Joan came home to visit in early March, and the family headed off to St. Mark’s for a Shrove Tuesday pancake supper.  When supper was over, they managed to get everyone out of the kitchen except Joan and the new seminarian, whom they put to work washing a mountain of dishes.  A romance was ignited, and the couple – Alec and Joan – married three and a half months later in 1956, just after Joan turned 20.

Joan would later say that Alec showed the world to her.  At the time of their marriage, she had barely left the state of Massachusetts.  In contrast, Alec had lived in New York City, studied at Harvard and in Zurich, and sailed around the world.  After their wedding, Alec introduced Joan to New York City before they drove across the country so that he could attend his final year of seminary at CDSP in Berkeley.  Joan got a job teaching preschool at the Claremont Day Nursery, which launched her decades-long teaching career.

The Southwestern High Desert

After Alec’s ordination, the couple moved to the Navajo Nation in Southwestern New Mexico, where Alec was a curate and Joan a volunteer teacher.  They worked there until Alec was called to become the new vicar at St. Anne’s Mission, in El Paso, Texas, near the border of Juarez, Mexico.  The couple really enjoyed developing the church community.  At the same time, Joan completed her bachelor’s degree in education at the University of Texas at El Paso.

After the birth of their first child (Mary) in 1962, Joan and Alec moved to Costa Rica for six months to learn Spanish and to work in the Afro-Caribbean Anglican churches on the country’s east coast. They returned with their new baby - now eight months old - and welcomed Joan’s parents, who had moved from Boston to El Paso to be close to them.  Alec’s mother, brother and his family also lived in El Paso, and they were delighted to be surrounded by extended family in the southwest.

Alec then accepted a call to become rector at St. John’s Episcopal Church in Alamogordo, NM.  Joan enjoyed 1960s and 1970s fashion and began wearing her iconic mini-skirts.  She had three more children -- Anne, John, and Peter.  Joan was a pioneer during that time period insisting on natural childbirth and in breastfeeding her children.  She loved playing and roughhousing with her kids.  Joan was also committed to gender-neutral parenting, giving dolls to her sons and toy trucks to her daughters to play with.

In addition to  caring for her growing family, Joan returned to teaching and worked at the Zia School, teaching children with disabilities.  In their free time, Joan and Alec explored the nearby Sacramento mountains.  They bought some undeveloped land at 9,000 feet elevation adjacent to a national forest outside the village of Cloudcroft.  Over a ten year period, they designed and built a beautiful mountain house, with floor-to-ceiling windows and wrap-around porch.  The house was frequented by family and friends, as well as served as a base for church retreats.

After about six years in Alamogordo, the Blairs moved to Las Cruces, where Alec accepted a call as the Episciopal chaplain at New Mexico State University’s Canterbury Center.  This was a heady time.  Joan and Alec quietly attracted a community of student activists, artists, and community leaders eager for social change.  They opposed the Viet Nam War and supported civil rights and feminist movements on campus.  They helped create an environment in which all were welcome and encouraged to creatively participate in a beloved community.

During this era, Joan earned her Masters Degree in education from New Mexico State University and got a teaching credential in special education.  She then taught special education classes at Gadsden Jr. High in Anthony, NM.  In her view, many of her students did not have specific learning disabilities.  Rather, they had not started first grade learning to read in their native language, and so had struggled and fell behind.

The California Years

In 1977 Alec and Joan decided to move to Berkeley so Alec could pursue graduate study in theology.  Joan landed her dream job teaching first grade in a bilingual classroom at Gehringer School in Oakley.  Joan was a beloved teacher.  She believed that children could learn to read more quickly and independently if they mastered phonics.  Even after the school district changed philosophies and curricula, Joan continued to teach phonics-based reading very successfully, purchasing class materials out of her own money.  She stayed in touch with some former students and their parents throughout her life.

Joan and Alec bought a house in Berkeley, and Joan’s parents, Mabel and Mac, moved nearby, their second relocation to be near the family.  Alongside raising their own four teenagers, Joan and Alec also welcomed foriegn exchange students into the home for summer or year-long stays. In total, the family hosted two Swedes, one Greek, one Brazilian, and a French student, many of whom remain dear friends to this day.

Joan and Alec’s involvement in All Souls Parish, Berkeley was central to their social, community and service lives.  They made wonderful friends.  Joan sang in the choir and served on the vestry.  She was involved in outreach efforts, including supporting refugee families.  She was proud that all four of her children were acolytes.

In 1988 after Alec finished his graduate study, Joan and Alec moved to Antioch, to be nearer to Joan’s school in Oakley as well as Alec’s new congregation of St. Albans, Brentwood.  Joan’s mother Mabel joined them as Allan had passed away in 1987.  Joan and Alec developed strong ties in their St. Alban’s community and Joan relished the shortness of her commute and living close to the school community.

In 1995, Joan and Alec decided to retire, and they returned to their house in Berkeley.  They enjoyed a long, fruitful retirement together.  Joan had always been artistic but now had time to devote to drawing and painting classes. She worked primarily with pastels and created beautiful icons.  Joan and Alec reconnected with their cherished community of All Souls Parish.  For years, Alec led a weekly Bible Study and presided at a healing Eucharist.  They faithfully attended weekly “Lunch Bunch,” and Joan became famous for her chicken enchiladas, Mediterranean salad, creamed corn casserole, and exquisite lemon meringue and apple pies.

Their children returned from college and pursued careers in California. Peter, John and Anne bought a large Victorian triplex together in San Francisco in 1997.  Mary settled in San Diego and visited often.  The six grandchildren began arriving.  Like her own parents had been, Joan was indispensable in helping to raise the next generation.  She cared for the San Francisco grandchildren regularly, and she and Alec traveled to San Diego to spend a week each month when Mary’s son was young.

As Alec became older and more frail, Joan spent most of her time with him.  They loved having their family and friends visit.  They enjoyed taking their coffee breaks in the backyard sun and listening to Baroque music together evenings in the living room. In June 2020, after a duration in hospice care, Alec died peacefully at home, surrounded by family.  He was 95.

Joan’s children in San Francisco created a studio garden apartment in their Victorian building.  Joan moved in and had a wonderful new chapter, living in close proximity to three children and their spouses, five grandchildren and multiple grand-dogs.  She loved being in the mix and walking in the Mission District.  Joan was diagnosed with CMML leukemia as well as a heart condition. Nonetheless, she enjoyed traveling to her daughter’s  cabin in the Sierras and participating in family weekends at the coast and at Bishop’s Ranch.  She managed the health conditions valiantly for nine months and had an excellent medical team.  Despite her declining health, Joan remained connected, engaged, and empathic toward everyone she came across.

On January 17, 2022, after a short period of hospice care, Joan died peacefully at home, surrounded by family.  She was looking forward to joining Alec and her parents.  We miss her so much, yet her spirit and creativity live on through all the people whose lives she touched.

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Joan relaxing in comfort at Romero's cabin

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Joan relaxing in comfort at Romero's cabin

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At Josie’s birthday celebration - she has a lot of change to count!  

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Joan with her granddaughters Maddie and Josie 

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Joan with her granddaughters Maddie and Josie 

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Peter losing at ping pong to Joan, with Luana as referee

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Peter losing at ping pong to Joan, with Luana as referee

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One more: Mrs. Blair’s Class’ Family Graph- The Laituri Family

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One more: Mrs. Blair’s Class’ Family Graph- The Laituri Family

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I loved this 2”x 6” keepsake from the family graph & framed it. As an only child, Dominic’s family was the smallest by far & a curiosity amongst his classmates, one of whom had 10 kids at home & asked me, “Linda, why do ya just got one kid?” 🤣

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My son, Dominic, with Joan, the teacher he will never forget because she became a family friend, & because she taught him to read! I thanked her endlessly for having the courage to buck our school district’s rejection of traditional phonics in favor of “modern” reading methods. At some point, the district returned to phonics!
Academic Olympics Award Night- 1990
Linda Laituri

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December 1990- The kids got to decorate fabulous egg carton Christmas trees & Joan put out an all call for baubles & beads. My son & I went to a thrift store & found a gallon sized ziplock bag of gems & jewels! He zeroed in on the large piece at the bottom of his tree & wanted it in the worst way. Joan snuck it to him in secret! This JB treasure has graced my mantle every Christmas for 31 years!
Linda Laituri

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Piñata Time! Cinco de Mayo celebration for Mrs. Blair’s class- May 1991. Our families brought in scrumptious tortillas, beans, & rice all made from scratch!

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Piñata Time! Cinco de Mayo celebration for Mrs. Blair’s class- May 1991. Our families brought in scrumptious tortillas, beans, & rice all made from scratch!

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Linda Laituri

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Fabulous First Grade! Spring 1991- Mrs. Blair with her kids on a  field trip to the Oakland Zoo. 

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Fabulous First Grade! Spring 1991- Mrs. Blair with her kids on a  field trip to the Oakland Zoo. 

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Linda Laituri

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From Elena Ramírez, Joan's dear friend at All Souls Parish

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From Elena Ramírez, Joan's dear friend at All Souls Parish

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Elena asked me to post this on her behalf, as she was asked to speak at the Memorial, but she felt she would get too emotional.
"I am here today to pay my respects to my dear friend Joan MacDonald Blair, a mother, a grandmother, a faithful sister in Christ for all her life, a wonderful friend. She was blessed with a long life and many years of service to her Lord.
I had the privilege of meeting Joan 12 years ago at All Souls Parish, in 2010, when  I was asked to join a group of leaders teaching Spanish to a group of members and neighbor Episcopalians from St. Alban's Parish, so the members could practice conversational Spanish. When this group ended, Joan approached me wanting to continue meeting with me, to remember and practice her well-known Spanish language. Subsequently, Joan, her husband, Fr. Dr. Alec Blair, and a friend of Joan met at my home every Tuesday afternoon, for tea and conversation in Spanish, for 5 years! (Joan called this gathering "High Tea"). We talked, we ate, we sung, we laughed, sharing our experiences, as we were almost from the same decade. Joan being from the North East of this country, and I from a small country in South America, the last point on Earth. I greatly enjoyed the lovely evenings with them. The afternoon gatherings ended, but our friendship continued, becoming deep in love, and sharing experiences as priests' wives.
Joan invited me to attend All Souls'. Thursdays healing services at noon, followed by the famous "Lunch Bunch". However, my first day at the lunch I was somewhat unwelcome, because somebody approached me in a demanding manner saying "What did you tell Joan to make her say that she will stop cooking and bringing food for the lunch bunch?" I was totally surprised, not remembering what I had said to Joan. Later on, it was clarified that I had given a suggestion to Joan to give up some of her cooking for the church, since she had done it for so long, as myself, and we both shared that we were somewhat tired of it. Anyway, I was welcomed to Lunch Bunch, and Joan and I continued preparing food to bring to the church for many more years.
Joan is now free to rest in God's eternal love.
By Elena C. Ramírez
Saturday 02-29-2022

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Mrs. Blair, First Grade Teacher Extraordinaire- January- 1991. Celebrating the 100th Day of school!  On this day, Joan brought out tubs & tubs of buttons, crayons, rubber bands, marbles, bottle caps, & more for the kids to practice their counting skills. Linda Laituri

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Mrs. Blair, First Grade Teacher Extraordinaire- January- 1991. Celebrating the 100th Day of school!  On this day, Joan brought out tubs & tubs of buttons, crayons, rubber bands, marbles, bottle caps, & more for the kids to practice their counting skills. Linda Laituri

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Texas Western Graduation in 1962 when Joan was pregnant with Mary 

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Texas Western Graduation in 1962 when Joan was pregnant with Mary 

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Visiting St. Marks, Dorchester, in 1956 and 2001

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Visiting St. Marks, Dorchester, in 1956 and 2001

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Joan and Alec at St. Anne's Mission in El Paso  

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Joan and Alec at St. Anne's Mission in El Paso  

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One of these two were looking pretty stylish!

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One of these two were looking pretty stylish!

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Mary looking up at Mama - cropped - Copy

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Luana and Joan about to eat a strawberry-kiwi cheesecake!

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Luana and Joan about to eat a strawberry-kiwi cheesecake!

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Marion came to visit in Berkeley soon after the family arrived in 1977

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Marion came to visit in Berkeley soon after the family arrived in 1977

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Joan, Alec and Mabel, costume party at St. Francis, Novato 1989

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Joan, Alec and Mabel, costume party at St. Francis, Novato 1989

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Joan, Alec, Mabel at costume party, St. Francis Novato 1989

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Joan and her kids at her 50th birthday party in Berkeley 

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Joan and her kids at her 50th birthday party in Berkeley 

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Joan with Anne, Carla and baby David  at the Russian River in 2004

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Joan with Anne, Carla and baby David  at the Russian River in 2004

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Alec, Mary, Joan at Mary's ordination, 1988

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Alec, Mary, Joan at Mary's ordination, 1988

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The remarkable magnolia tree in Berkeley 

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The remarkable magnolia tree in Berkeley 

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The coveted family portrait that Joan always wanted in Berkeley 

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The coveted family portrait that Joan always wanted in Berkeley 

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Remembering Joan's friend, Anne Jordan, who helped make it possible 

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Touring recently completed Jordan Court Senior Housing at All Souls

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Touring recently completed Jordan Court Senior Housing at All Souls

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Joan with Carla before she left for her first year at college

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Joan and Peter at the SF house- from 1998 and 2020

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Joan and Peter at the SF house- from 1998 and 2020

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At Peter's birthday party as he passes the half century mark

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At Peter's birthday party as he passes the half century mark

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Elena Ramirez and Joan at Barney's, after church at All Souls (2021)

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Elena Ramirez and Joan at Barney's, after church at All Souls (2021)

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with Elena Ramirez eating lunch at Barneys after church at All Souls, 2021.JPG

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Olivia is the daughter of Anne's god daughter 

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Joan at dinner with her niece Sue Blair 

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Joan at dinner with her niece Sue Blair 

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San Jalisco - best Chile Rellenos in the neighborhood - like the old days in El Paso

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Joan, Mary, Maddie at Joan's 85th in SF backyard, 2021

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Joan, Mary, Maddie at Joan's 85th in SF backyard, 2021

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85th birthday garden party with chicken enchiladas! 

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85th birthday garden party with chicken enchiladas! 

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Joan & Alec & grandkids, Mother's Day 2019

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Joan & Alec & grandkids, Mother's Day 2019

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Joan in sunny Berkeley back yard reading 

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Joan in sunny Berkeley back yard reading 

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Joan reading Louis' baby book in back yard, Berkeley

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Joan and Mary walking at Heron's Head Park, SF

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Joan and Mary walking at Heron's Head Park, SF

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Joan and Mary walking at Heron's Head Park, SF

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Joan loved being up at Anne & Michael’s cabin in Sierras, which reminded her of the beautiful house she and Alec built in the Sacramento Mts in Cloudcroft, NM